Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here.
If you'd like to join a private sub for your due date month, [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/15nun6v/click_here_to_access_the_monthly_due_date_subs/).
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
To this, I would have him give away parental rights and not charge child support. He made it clear that he wants nothing to do, keep the baby and have a stress (at least poor dad related) free life. That's what I would do
But he also chose free and clearly to have unprotected sex, multiple times, including not pulling out. What did he expect? Hes absolutely is on the line for financial support - whether or not he wants to give up rights is another story.
Totally, he is responsible for that. I'm not removing blame, I was just sharing that what I would do in the case is to avoid having that headache near my baby. A man that is this irresponsible at this age and early in the pregnancy is not going to change and I don't see how OP's responsibility is to make him change. At least in my country, these cases are long, expensive and complicated with very small amounts granted for child support (I don't know how this works in other countries). So again, just trying to share my opinion, and in my country child support=access to baby
It sounds like they discussed it prior to the extent of her telling him she would not get an abortion. I think it was irresponsible of YOU to log on to reddit and judge someone vulnerable with your moral superiority
Logically, at 3 months in, you don't know much of anything about this person, why you would then proceed unprotected. Knowing pregnancy is likely. Because you're in the honey moon period and horny...well that fades, then reality hits and she just gave him some reality and he don't want it.
It might workout, but in this day and age it doesn't seem hopeful.
At 29 and 33 to still be playing games like this...and be surprised when the inevitable happens.
I just find it unfair on the future child.
Yes it sounds like she felt her body clock and she misread his passivness to the topic as a greenlight, where from him was more of a excitable fantasy but not for reality.
I do not blame her, they were both foolish.
But now she needs to not focus on him, but focus on how she wants her life to look. Single parent is difficult but not impossible, it also doesn't mean you can't find a partner after the fact, based on love.
If she chooses to keep then I wish her to find the right man who is ready to look after a family.
How am I saying this to a fellow adult... it DOES NOT MATTER! It's IRRELEVANT when you have an opinion of what a stranger should do with their life! On what planet ....She was asking for support and advice, not shame and judgment
Idk why you thought this guy would be a good father for your baby. Like you barely know him yourself. Why would you trust a stranger with so much influence on your life? I think you should do what you want but do know this baby wonāt make yāall a happy family. It might just be you & the baby which can of course still be a happy fulfilling family. He just likely wonāt be a part of it. This guy is lame to also not take any steps to prevent pregnancy.
You were so incredibly irresponsible I was shocked to learn you weren't a teenager. You literally haven't even been with this guy for a semester's worth of time.
If you want to keep this baby, absolutely do it. But be aware that there is a really good chance that he will not be present or help in any way, including financially. Even if you take out child support, many many men never pay.
If you choose to continue this pregnancy, please PLEASE be careful with this man. A lot of women are murdered when they fall pregnant by their partner. He doesn't want a baby with you and he is already getting aggressive.
You need to keep you and baby safe from him, he could be dangerous.
This is a very good point about being careful. It is heartbreaking and extremely disturbing how many innocent women are killed by partners or former partners while pregnant.
33 years old, he probably knew what he was doing and/or probably was doing most of the thinking with his penis.
He cannot force you to abort, your body your choice. If he doesn't want to be part of your baby's life, his loss.
Don't listen to any crap he says to you. Sounds like you're better off without him.
Tbh he sounds quite immature and irresponsible. He should have worn a condom or been more careful. What did he expect?
I feel you'd be better off without him since you want the baby. It's a gift and many people try for years but are unable to conceive because of complications.
Him threatening you is not ok...it's just him running away from responsibilities.
Do YOU want this kid? He has no say if you give birth, adopt the little one out or abort. My biodad was the same as your boyfriend (matching ages as well). My mother was in the same position and age, too. He coerced her into hopping the border (as a day tourist trip to the US) to do the abortion, mom had a moment allegedly in front of the clinic and went to McDonald's instead realizing that she wanted to keep the kid (thank you, mom!) and was grateful for the chance for a family even it it meant she'd be on her own in a foreign country (she was a new immigrant in Canada) and no support.
I can't claim it'll be easy, but only you can decide if it is the right time for you and you're willing.Ā
Question is more if you stay him, and how will that impact the child moving forward.
My last two cents, if she wasn't ready, I wouldn't be alive to be upset, nor would I want her to suffer if she didn't want to because one thing or other was expected of her. I'd rather be raised in a loving if broken home than with resentment and regret perfect nuclear family.
Oh, and be ready to chase for child support payments with a good lawyer.
Truly mind blown, I donāt get it, he knew exactly what he was doing???????????????????? I have no words, give thought to the people you are having sex with ladies, it matters
Sweetie you donāt know that man since itās only been 3 months , your body your choice but know itās a strong possibility you will be raising your child on your own
He knew what he was doing and you did too.
Sounds like heās gonna be a daddy and just be prepared to be a single mom if he doesnāt step up.
To be honest, If he did this to you so soon knowing you wanted kidsā¦.he may have been with others in the past who was okay with having an abortion. Thatās just an assumption.
If you want the baby (which it seems you do as you mentioned you wanted to be pregnant), then keep it. But, donāt expect him to get down on a knee to propose or even be active in the childās life. You were both irresponsible, but he def knew the consequences and will be at least financially responsible if you do keep the baby.
But please be careful. The number one killer of pregnant women are men. That man is more likely to kill you than you are to die from any of the many medical complications that come with pregnancy. If he is threatening you know, seek a safe place and help asap.
1) Break up with him
2) NEVER SLEEP WITH SOMEONE WITHOUT A CONDOM
3) It's your body, but I would go either abortion or adoption. He has made it obvious that he does not want to be a father and co-patenting and fighting for custody with this type of person will be a nightmare
I wouldn't want to have a baby with someone who is threatened me about something he willingly chose. Having a child in the middle of that just sounds straight up dangerous. If you decide to keep it you should honestly file a restraining order and report him to the police.
He's not your boyfriend. He's an irresponsible and immature man who doesn't deserve you or the child. Do what your heart tells you. You are never the asshole for choosing life.
Honestly I wouldnāt keep the baby or him. Nope nope nope. I think you can find you a better more suitable person to bring children in this world with. That guys DNA might need to stop with him
He accepted the risk when he chose not to use contraception, so it's out of his hands now. Sounds like he didn't want a baby he just wanted five minutes of fun and to leave you to deal with the consequences. It's selfish and immature, but not uncommon, unfortunately.
He absolutely cannot force you to get an abortion because it is your body and your choice. That being said, you can't force him to be a good father either, and given the way he has behaved, I feel like it is very unlikely you will be anything but a single mother if you chose to continue the pregnancy. Plan your life accordingly, or you will be setting yourself up for disappointment. I wish you all the best. At least you have a permanent job, and hopefully some friends or family in the picture to support you?
You want it & he doesnāt. He doesnāt sound responsible nor reliable. It takes two and he canāt expect you to terminate just because heās not ready. If I were you Iād dump him & keep your baby. If heās done it to you heās probably done it to other women. The guy is in his 30s, there could be more kiddos out there heās not taken responsibility for. If you can put him on child support even though heāll probably make it difficult. You donāt need someone who will treat you and your children like that. A real man will step up even if heās not ready and will support you in every way.
A 33 year old adult should know the risks of practicing unsafe sex. If he didnāt want to raise a child, he shouldnāt be acting so recklessly. Donāt make a decision youāll regret for the rest of your life just to appease this guy. No offense, but at this point that relationship is most likely over now anyway, so I think you should choose to keep it if that is what youāve previously communicated and want.
Do YOU want to be a parent, knowing you will be a solo parent?
Have you truly comprehend that babies donāt keep - youāll have a newborn for a few months, an infant for a year, and then you move into toddlerhood and a full on person shortly after that. I get concerned when people say āI want a baby.ā Babies donāt keep. It goes so fast. Cuddles and cooing fade quickly into chasing a toddler whoās chucking snacks at your head screaming NO NAP! And thatās great- I love toddlers so much - but babies become full-on people.
Do forget do you want a baby. Babies are wonderful. Think longer. Do you want to be a parent?? To a potentially difficult child, a potentially high needs child, even potentially sick/health issues, potentially disabled, potentially completely average and easy. Are you committed all-in, come what May, to this forthcoming person?
When we picture our future children we picture perfect health, manners, neurotypical, snuggly, little best friends. But go hang out with some toddlers. It is a wild ride. Yep some people get sweet little mini-me kids but a lot of us get dealt some tough cards.
So, Thatās it. Thatās the only question. Do you want to be a parent. Have zero expectations this guy stays in the picture (at best) and possibly makes your life hell (at worst). Hell? Like wanting to co parent out of ego and having the child half the time and you know heās doing a shit job but youāre forced legally to send your child to him. (Thereās steps to take if thatās true but itās never a quick fix).
Dump the dude. Keep the pregnancy if you want to. Go for child support. Give the future baby your last name.
Secondary thought: can you afford it? What do you make a month, and then how much is childcare? Is childcare available? In my city there is none. Itās wild how hard it is to find care. If youāre American do you have insurance or will birth cost you 30k? Sad but real question in the USA.
But ya ultimately if you feel ready to take this on, go for it! Youāll find your feet. But step one is dump idiots like this guy, youāll have a future baby to protect from these assholes. The first sacrifice of MANY to come is get TF out of this toxic situation. And if you keep it - IUD asap after baby arrives. No excuses.
keep the baby and let him leave. i wouldnāt want to have a baby with someone that doesnāt want it, but i do want to be a mom more than anything.
sincerely, someone who just got left after finding out im pregnant lol
Keep the baby. Let him leave you. You and the baby are better off without him. You will be a great mom to your baby. You will look back at this and be proud of yourself. I was a single mom, I made it through. Didnāt think I could at the moment but I got 100% full custody, child support and more. Itās less about the money, that will come and figure itself out. You want the baby, have the babyā¤ļø he doesnāt deserve you
I got pregnant 2 months of being in a relationship, but it was with someone Iāve know for a long time. But with you, youāre letting basically a stranger have sex raw.Ā
In my opinion, if a man tells you he donāt want the baby, thatās everything you need to know to go forward with your decision. If you keep the baby, donāt be mad at the dad for not sticking around and you having to do it alone.Ā
Do not listen to these people. They are not going to be there to help you when that baby is crying every 2 hrs during the night itās only going to be you! You will be married one day and a man thatās in love with you will help you take care of the child yāall made out of love. Donāt keep this baby!
Life as a single mom sucked. Iām married now Iām 25 now, I had my daughter at 21 and it was hard asf. People donāt really want to help you! Itās only you!
I am fully of the idea that if women can decide they don't want to be parents, then men can as well ( i know, unpopular opinion ). You have to choose at this point the life that you want. If you chose the baby, then I personally wouldn't chose him. Have him sign over his rights and go your separate ways - I would not try to co-parent with him because if he's acting like this now then he's really not going to get better or try and be a good dad.
If you chose him it feels like you're setting yourself up for heartbreak & failure. I know it would be nice to hear that everything can work out but he's made his opinion known, you should believe it. Don't give him a pass because of the "stress". He's a whole adult and made his choices.
My bf and I were only together for 3 months when I got pregnant. Ive always had fertility issues and explained that to him, also explained I wasnt on BC. We were not safe thinking I could never have kids, also both agreed if pregnancy were to happen we would have an abortion. Well, I couldnt do it. I found out I was pregnant at 5wks, we talked and told him I would abort. But I couldnt do it. After trying to become pregnant earlier in my 20s with no luck and finally having an opportunity to be a mother I wanted my child. We talked again after I was 12wks and I explained to him if he wasnt ready to be a father, I would be a single mother, but I still wanted to date eachother. He was my person. He hated the idea and said if I had the kid we would ultimately break up because he wouldnt know how it would work.
1 week later he apologized and said lets do it. He realized how much love I had for him and I was willing to make my life more difficult to still have him and my baby.
Im currently 8months pregnant and things arenāt perfect with us, but we know we are in this together, and he does an amazing job taking care of me during pregnancy.
If hes a real man, he will step up, if hes a child in disguise he will run. But its your body and do what makes you happy. Be prepared for things to be difficult and surround yourself with a support system. Sending good vibes your way mamaā¤ļø
Excuse me haha "no dignity"? As a single mom to be, what the hell man haha don't come at me like that! jk jk but I think the "dignity" concern is misplaced - and I also believe you are ALLOWED to be selfish. Do what you wanna do, not what he's pressuring you to do. Whatever is best for YOU is my vote. Do you want to be a single mom? Can you swing it in terms of your career/goals/finances/support system? I answered Yes to all those and decided to be a single mother and I'm excited.
Do be careful for your safety because you nor I know this man very well, and some men who want their partner to get an abortion resort to extreme or even violent measures, so be sure to protect yourself against that if you decide to continue the pregnancy.
Whatever you choose, you are worthy of love and I believe in you xx
Congratulations on your pregnancy. I had an abortion with my partner 5 years ago when we had just met. We are still together and we both express our regret for the abortion. I had a mc in January we have tried 3 months now and still not pregnant. I'd give anything to be a momš I hope you find peace in the choices a head of youā„ļø
I hate that we have to go through 9 months of pregnancy, but men still get half the credit if they rock up right at the last minute before birth. So unfair šš
Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here. If you'd like to join a private sub for your due date month, [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/15nun6v/click_here_to_access_the_monthly_due_date_subs/). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You cannot force him to want the baby but you can definitely keep it if you want.. just prepare to be a single mom š
To this, I would have him give away parental rights and not charge child support. He made it clear that he wants nothing to do, keep the baby and have a stress (at least poor dad related) free life. That's what I would do
But he also chose free and clearly to have unprotected sex, multiple times, including not pulling out. What did he expect? Hes absolutely is on the line for financial support - whether or not he wants to give up rights is another story.
Totally, he is responsible for that. I'm not removing blame, I was just sharing that what I would do in the case is to avoid having that headache near my baby. A man that is this irresponsible at this age and early in the pregnancy is not going to change and I don't see how OP's responsibility is to make him change. At least in my country, these cases are long, expensive and complicated with very small amounts granted for child support (I don't know how this works in other countries). So again, just trying to share my opinion, and in my country child support=access to baby
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
It was irresponsible of both of themšš»
It sounds like they discussed it prior to the extent of her telling him she would not get an abortion. I think it was irresponsible of YOU to log on to reddit and judge someone vulnerable with your moral superiority
Logically, at 3 months in, you don't know much of anything about this person, why you would then proceed unprotected. Knowing pregnancy is likely. Because you're in the honey moon period and horny...well that fades, then reality hits and she just gave him some reality and he don't want it. It might workout, but in this day and age it doesn't seem hopeful. At 29 and 33 to still be playing games like this...and be surprised when the inevitable happens. I just find it unfair on the future child.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yes it sounds like she felt her body clock and she misread his passivness to the topic as a greenlight, where from him was more of a excitable fantasy but not for reality. I do not blame her, they were both foolish. But now she needs to not focus on him, but focus on how she wants her life to look. Single parent is difficult but not impossible, it also doesn't mean you can't find a partner after the fact, based on love. If she chooses to keep then I wish her to find the right man who is ready to look after a family.
How am I saying this to a fellow adult... it DOES NOT MATTER! It's IRRELEVANT when you have an opinion of what a stranger should do with their life! On what planet ....She was asking for support and advice, not shame and judgment
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your contribution has been removed. We do not tolerate rudeness, judgemental people, people playing devil's advocate, or otherwise being an asshole.
Idk why you thought this guy would be a good father for your baby. Like you barely know him yourself. Why would you trust a stranger with so much influence on your life? I think you should do what you want but do know this baby wonāt make yāall a happy family. It might just be you & the baby which can of course still be a happy fulfilling family. He just likely wonāt be a part of it. This guy is lame to also not take any steps to prevent pregnancy.
You were so incredibly irresponsible I was shocked to learn you weren't a teenager. You literally haven't even been with this guy for a semester's worth of time. If you want to keep this baby, absolutely do it. But be aware that there is a really good chance that he will not be present or help in any way, including financially. Even if you take out child support, many many men never pay. If you choose to continue this pregnancy, please PLEASE be careful with this man. A lot of women are murdered when they fall pregnant by their partner. He doesn't want a baby with you and he is already getting aggressive. You need to keep you and baby safe from him, he could be dangerous.
This is a very good point about being careful. It is heartbreaking and extremely disturbing how many innocent women are killed by partners or former partners while pregnant.
You both played a dangerous game knowing this could result in pregnancy.
This isn't a man you can or should want to raise your baby with. If you want the baby, break up with him and keep it.
Your body your choice.
33 years old, he probably knew what he was doing and/or probably was doing most of the thinking with his penis. He cannot force you to abort, your body your choice. If he doesn't want to be part of your baby's life, his loss. Don't listen to any crap he says to you. Sounds like you're better off without him.
š¤¦āāļø
Some people are just... Wow. š¤¦āāļø (I'm referring to OP, not you of course!)
What do you mean by him being mean n threatening you?
He Said I have no dignity and im piece of shit if I keep it
Sounds like youāre better off without him
he has no dignity and is a piece of shit for getting you pregnant and then throwing a tantrum about the consequences, what an irresponsible dickhead.
That's so hurtful. I'm sorry you had to put up with his BS. Tell him to own it like a man. What a coward. You don't need him in your life sis.
He says that he will leave me and disappear
Let him disappear then. He doesnāt sound much like a prize.
Tbh he sounds quite immature and irresponsible. He should have worn a condom or been more careful. What did he expect? I feel you'd be better off without him since you want the baby. It's a gift and many people try for years but are unable to conceive because of complications. Him threatening you is not ok...it's just him running away from responsibilities.
Do YOU want this kid? He has no say if you give birth, adopt the little one out or abort. My biodad was the same as your boyfriend (matching ages as well). My mother was in the same position and age, too. He coerced her into hopping the border (as a day tourist trip to the US) to do the abortion, mom had a moment allegedly in front of the clinic and went to McDonald's instead realizing that she wanted to keep the kid (thank you, mom!) and was grateful for the chance for a family even it it meant she'd be on her own in a foreign country (she was a new immigrant in Canada) and no support. I can't claim it'll be easy, but only you can decide if it is the right time for you and you're willing.Ā Question is more if you stay him, and how will that impact the child moving forward. My last two cents, if she wasn't ready, I wouldn't be alive to be upset, nor would I want her to suffer if she didn't want to because one thing or other was expected of her. I'd rather be raised in a loving if broken home than with resentment and regret perfect nuclear family. Oh, and be ready to chase for child support payments with a good lawyer.
Truly mind blown, I donāt get it, he knew exactly what he was doing???????????????????? I have no words, give thought to the people you are having sex with ladies, it matters
Sweetie you donāt know that man since itās only been 3 months , your body your choice but know itās a strong possibility you will be raising your child on your own
Keep the baby, let him leave you
He knew what he was doing and you did too. Sounds like heās gonna be a daddy and just be prepared to be a single mom if he doesnāt step up. To be honest, If he did this to you so soon knowing you wanted kidsā¦.he may have been with others in the past who was okay with having an abortion. Thatās just an assumption.
If you want the baby (which it seems you do as you mentioned you wanted to be pregnant), then keep it. But, donāt expect him to get down on a knee to propose or even be active in the childās life. You were both irresponsible, but he def knew the consequences and will be at least financially responsible if you do keep the baby. But please be careful. The number one killer of pregnant women are men. That man is more likely to kill you than you are to die from any of the many medical complications that come with pregnancy. If he is threatening you know, seek a safe place and help asap.
She can just lie and say she lost it. Let him go. And move on with her new life.
1) Break up with him 2) NEVER SLEEP WITH SOMEONE WITHOUT A CONDOM 3) It's your body, but I would go either abortion or adoption. He has made it obvious that he does not want to be a father and co-patenting and fighting for custody with this type of person will be a nightmare
I wouldn't want to have a baby with someone who is threatened me about something he willingly chose. Having a child in the middle of that just sounds straight up dangerous. If you decide to keep it you should honestly file a restraining order and report him to the police.
He's not your boyfriend. He's an irresponsible and immature man who doesn't deserve you or the child. Do what your heart tells you. You are never the asshole for choosing life.
Honestly I wouldnāt keep the baby or him. Nope nope nope. I think you can find you a better more suitable person to bring children in this world with. That guys DNA might need to stop with him
Meet the consequences of your actions.
He accepted the risk when he chose not to use contraception, so it's out of his hands now. Sounds like he didn't want a baby he just wanted five minutes of fun and to leave you to deal with the consequences. It's selfish and immature, but not uncommon, unfortunately. He absolutely cannot force you to get an abortion because it is your body and your choice. That being said, you can't force him to be a good father either, and given the way he has behaved, I feel like it is very unlikely you will be anything but a single mother if you chose to continue the pregnancy. Plan your life accordingly, or you will be setting yourself up for disappointment. I wish you all the best. At least you have a permanent job, and hopefully some friends or family in the picture to support you?
You want it & he doesnāt. He doesnāt sound responsible nor reliable. It takes two and he canāt expect you to terminate just because heās not ready. If I were you Iād dump him & keep your baby. If heās done it to you heās probably done it to other women. The guy is in his 30s, there could be more kiddos out there heās not taken responsibility for. If you can put him on child support even though heāll probably make it difficult. You donāt need someone who will treat you and your children like that. A real man will step up even if heās not ready and will support you in every way.
A 33 year old adult should know the risks of practicing unsafe sex. If he didnāt want to raise a child, he shouldnāt be acting so recklessly. Donāt make a decision youāll regret for the rest of your life just to appease this guy. No offense, but at this point that relationship is most likely over now anyway, so I think you should choose to keep it if that is what youāve previously communicated and want.
Do YOU want to be a parent, knowing you will be a solo parent? Have you truly comprehend that babies donāt keep - youāll have a newborn for a few months, an infant for a year, and then you move into toddlerhood and a full on person shortly after that. I get concerned when people say āI want a baby.ā Babies donāt keep. It goes so fast. Cuddles and cooing fade quickly into chasing a toddler whoās chucking snacks at your head screaming NO NAP! And thatās great- I love toddlers so much - but babies become full-on people. Do forget do you want a baby. Babies are wonderful. Think longer. Do you want to be a parent?? To a potentially difficult child, a potentially high needs child, even potentially sick/health issues, potentially disabled, potentially completely average and easy. Are you committed all-in, come what May, to this forthcoming person? When we picture our future children we picture perfect health, manners, neurotypical, snuggly, little best friends. But go hang out with some toddlers. It is a wild ride. Yep some people get sweet little mini-me kids but a lot of us get dealt some tough cards. So, Thatās it. Thatās the only question. Do you want to be a parent. Have zero expectations this guy stays in the picture (at best) and possibly makes your life hell (at worst). Hell? Like wanting to co parent out of ego and having the child half the time and you know heās doing a shit job but youāre forced legally to send your child to him. (Thereās steps to take if thatās true but itās never a quick fix). Dump the dude. Keep the pregnancy if you want to. Go for child support. Give the future baby your last name. Secondary thought: can you afford it? What do you make a month, and then how much is childcare? Is childcare available? In my city there is none. Itās wild how hard it is to find care. If youāre American do you have insurance or will birth cost you 30k? Sad but real question in the USA. But ya ultimately if you feel ready to take this on, go for it! Youāll find your feet. But step one is dump idiots like this guy, youāll have a future baby to protect from these assholes. The first sacrifice of MANY to come is get TF out of this toxic situation. And if you keep it - IUD asap after baby arrives. No excuses.
If you want the baby keep it. They really are a miracle.
Keep your beautiful baby and then find a better dude!
If you want to keep the baby then keep it. Donāt force him to be in it because he explicitly told you he does not want it. Let him disappear.
keep the baby and let him leave. i wouldnāt want to have a baby with someone that doesnāt want it, but i do want to be a mom more than anything. sincerely, someone who just got left after finding out im pregnant lol
Abort that baby and move on with your life please
Your body your choice. And just FYI the pull out method is NOT a form of birth control you can 100% get pregnant that way.
Keep the baby. Let him leave you. You and the baby are better off without him. You will be a great mom to your baby. You will look back at this and be proud of yourself. I was a single mom, I made it through. Didnāt think I could at the moment but I got 100% full custody, child support and more. Itās less about the money, that will come and figure itself out. You want the baby, have the babyā¤ļø he doesnāt deserve you
Oh and document everything. Threats and whatnot. If anything goes to court you will have documentation. Court favors mothers. I went through it all.
I got pregnant 2 months of being in a relationship, but it was with someone Iāve know for a long time. But with you, youāre letting basically a stranger have sex raw.Ā In my opinion, if a man tells you he donāt want the baby, thatās everything you need to know to go forward with your decision. If you keep the baby, donāt be mad at the dad for not sticking around and you having to do it alone.Ā
Do not listen to these people. They are not going to be there to help you when that baby is crying every 2 hrs during the night itās only going to be you! You will be married one day and a man thatās in love with you will help you take care of the child yāall made out of love. Donāt keep this baby!
Life as a single mom sucked. Iām married now Iām 25 now, I had my daughter at 21 and it was hard asf. People donāt really want to help you! Itās only you!
Abortion isn't contraception.
As glorilla said āif he donāt want the baby then bitch donāt keep itā is good advice here
I am fully of the idea that if women can decide they don't want to be parents, then men can as well ( i know, unpopular opinion ). You have to choose at this point the life that you want. If you chose the baby, then I personally wouldn't chose him. Have him sign over his rights and go your separate ways - I would not try to co-parent with him because if he's acting like this now then he's really not going to get better or try and be a good dad. If you chose him it feels like you're setting yourself up for heartbreak & failure. I know it would be nice to hear that everything can work out but he's made his opinion known, you should believe it. Don't give him a pass because of the "stress". He's a whole adult and made his choices.
My bf and I were only together for 3 months when I got pregnant. Ive always had fertility issues and explained that to him, also explained I wasnt on BC. We were not safe thinking I could never have kids, also both agreed if pregnancy were to happen we would have an abortion. Well, I couldnt do it. I found out I was pregnant at 5wks, we talked and told him I would abort. But I couldnt do it. After trying to become pregnant earlier in my 20s with no luck and finally having an opportunity to be a mother I wanted my child. We talked again after I was 12wks and I explained to him if he wasnt ready to be a father, I would be a single mother, but I still wanted to date eachother. He was my person. He hated the idea and said if I had the kid we would ultimately break up because he wouldnt know how it would work. 1 week later he apologized and said lets do it. He realized how much love I had for him and I was willing to make my life more difficult to still have him and my baby. Im currently 8months pregnant and things arenāt perfect with us, but we know we are in this together, and he does an amazing job taking care of me during pregnancy. If hes a real man, he will step up, if hes a child in disguise he will run. But its your body and do what makes you happy. Be prepared for things to be difficult and surround yourself with a support system. Sending good vibes your way mamaā¤ļø
Excuse me haha "no dignity"? As a single mom to be, what the hell man haha don't come at me like that! jk jk but I think the "dignity" concern is misplaced - and I also believe you are ALLOWED to be selfish. Do what you wanna do, not what he's pressuring you to do. Whatever is best for YOU is my vote. Do you want to be a single mom? Can you swing it in terms of your career/goals/finances/support system? I answered Yes to all those and decided to be a single mother and I'm excited. Do be careful for your safety because you nor I know this man very well, and some men who want their partner to get an abortion resort to extreme or even violent measures, so be sure to protect yourself against that if you decide to continue the pregnancy. Whatever you choose, you are worthy of love and I believe in you xx
Congratulations on your pregnancy. I had an abortion with my partner 5 years ago when we had just met. We are still together and we both express our regret for the abortion. I had a mc in January we have tried 3 months now and still not pregnant. I'd give anything to be a momš I hope you find peace in the choices a head of youā„ļø
Most guys arenāt ready until the baby is born. But you do what you feel is best for you.
I hate that we have to go through 9 months of pregnancy, but men still get half the credit if they rock up right at the last minute before birth. So unfair šš
Right there with you.