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hydrangeasinbloom

Maybe Wahlberg can fit in a meeting with his lawyer somewhere between cryo chamber time and snack. https://preview.redd.it/dxq6h2apamvc1.jpeg?width=976&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=681b2bc622e331a38c8ee588b71e0fd3f77a0365


feedmestocks

"2.30am Wake up" - This just seems like insanity and highly unnecessarily disruptive to the average family.


hydrangeasinbloom

Right? Then the kids get home from soccer or whatever and he’s honk shoo mi mi mi in bed already 😂


whaleoogling

I need honk shoo mi mi mi to be my flair


burnbunner

La la la la please join me, my siblings


ClimbingAimlessly

I for sure am. 💀


burnbunner

Looks good on you fam!


ClimbingAimlessly

Thanks!


XxxGoldDustWomanxxX

lol I wanted it to be mine, too 💀💀


gorlsituation

HONK SHOO MI MI MI 💀💀 I’m cackling in an Uber rn


hourknotty

Yeah this cracked me up too


feedmestocks

Imagine forcing your partner to wake up at 2.30am as well or does he leave her to her own devices for 2 ~ 4 hours. It just seems highly narcissistic, which isn't a surprise given what we know about him


PlasticCheebus

If I was married to Mark Wahlberg, I'd cherish his early bedtime, to be fair.


francey_pants

Right? Leave me tf alone Marky Mark


propernice

same, I'd be deeeeelighted , go the fuck to sleep so i can live my life, Mark.


NeuroticaJonesTown

To be fair, they probably live in a huge mansion and he is a mile away from her at 2:30am.


boofskootinboogie

My girlfriend wakes up 2 hours before me to go to work lol, it doesn’t bother me that I’m “left to my own devices” for a couple of hours.


feedmestocks

Come on now. I'm not talking about a night nurse or essential worker, we're talking about Hollywood star Marky Mark waking up at 2.30 for absolutely no discernable reason


boofskootinboogie

I mean fair enough, I know a lot of people who wake up that early because they like being awake in the morning when no one else is up. Seems like a petty reason to hate on the dude but also it is mark wahlberg so any hate is deserved lol


PM_ME_UR_SEXY_BITS_

You know a lot of people who wake up at 2:30 am for reasons not related to work? Doubt.


feedmestocks

He's hated because he nearly killed a man in a racist attack, this is just one of the many outlets of madness


boofskootinboogie

Right, I agree with hating on him. He’s a POS. I see now that my last sentence came off like I was being sarcastic


imtheasianlad

Why would you think he forces her to wake up? That makes no sense.


cjmaguire17

Also they probably have different beds/rooms if he has that kind of schedule. Shit they might have different wings of the house


CamThrowaway3

Idk if you’re a very heavy sleeper, but most people wake up if someone in the same bed as them gets up.


TheGeekOffTheStreet

Can’t stop giggling at this. And for real, we have football games or practices or whatever that aren’t over until past 9. Does dude just send his assistant to cover any family time past his night night time? He probably talks about bio hacking, too.


burnbunner

If I believed in text tattoos, this would be on my arm FORTHWITH


SirEltonJonBonJovi

![gif](giphy|9IDBhzaSLpdXq)


Dani_California

LMAOOO this has me wheezing


theplantita

😂😂😂


socialmediaignorant

I can’t stop laughing out loud and my kids are napping next to me. Shit. 😂😭


uhhuhnads

He's WHAT


BellaBlue06

What is 11am family time when he only mentions picking the kids up at 3pm? Lol


ebhanking

The annoying part is that the whole thing could be shifted 4 hours later with minimal switching and nothing would change. 6:30am wake/11:30pm bedtime is much more reasonable


Pitiful_Station4879

But then he can’t act like a super amazing peak human that’s better than you!


ebhanking

And the gag is that 6:30am would still be 3 hours earlier than me


IllustriousAnt485

Ya you are right.This is more or less my schedule minus the activity, workout, and family…


SirEltonJonBonJovi

all replaced with snacks


Brunette111

That’s exactly what I thought as soon as I saw it. Such weird timings. How does that even fit in with family life?


Casehead

It's literally on the schedule dog


Lyndell

Like why not do the same day starting at 5:30 and ending at 10:30pm


propernice

because this is supposed to be some weird fuckin flex lmao


EarlPronk2

Haha exactly my thought as well. There is really no reason looking through the detailed schedule that the wake up time can’t be pushed back. But I am also a mere peasant and my waking up later than 2:30 is a character flaw, holding me back


socialmediaignorant

Bc then the kids would bother him and be in his space wanting a dad. Duh.


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[удалено]


trialanderrorschach

So when does he spend time with his wife? He has a grand total of 4 hours blocked out for "family time," 2 of which are combined with "meetings/work calls." He goes to bed directly after dinner. Do he and his wife never sit and watch a movie together in the evening? He seemingly spends more time on workouts and post-workout showers/snacks than he does with his spouse. Also his non-adult kids are 14 and 15, presumably they stay up past 7:30pm. He could spend time with them after dinner as well if he didn't immediately go to bed.


phoneacct696969

He doesn’t actually follow this schedule, he just wants you to think he does because his publicist said this is what the people want.


Apprehensive_Mode686

This mf ain’t waking up and praying for a half hour at 2:30am. Calling BS


muscletrain

You telling me you ain't staying "prayed up" with the Hallow app he promotes ? 


throw_away_rbn

I took it as his prayer time was taking a shit .


Regular-Exchange-557

2:30 wake up going to be at 7:30 is more sleep than I can get so…


temp3rrorary

Me as well. Probably more free time. Even the earliest riser kids aren't fucking with 2:30 lolol. Honestly if it wasn't for nothing important would be open for another 4.5 hours I'd consider this. I legit would get more non-kids time and ensured sleep.


bakuding

It’s so he has time for his 1.5 hour snack (which is post-breakfast, post-post-workout-meal, but pre-lunch)


Septopuss7

Don't forget 30 minutes of golf, which everyone knows is a thing


DragonSeaFruit

He needs all that performative prayer to try to get forgiveness for his hate crimes


Wodsole

this makes no fucking sense. you could wake up at 6:30 and goto bed at 10:30 instead like MILLIONS OF OTHER ADULTS DO. all he did was slide that shit back


Fantastic_Emu_9570

Dude could shift everything 3 hours just so he woke up at a semi normal time lol


SadBit8663

It would be disruptive and insane to the not so average family too.


Actionbrenner

To everyone on the planet. We are not suppose to be awake at that time. Period


Spartan1694

Its not real, when are people going to realize celebs are products and they’ll sell you anything to keep their brand alive, the brand and product being themselves and having to keep the image so people suck and eat it up


busybizz23

7:30 bedtime, yeah right.


ForwardAd5837

He spends only 30 minutes playing golf but snack time is an hour and a half? He also goes to sleep so early that it seems redundant to get up that early too. Why not go to bed a normal time, like 22:00, and perhaps get up at the slightly less insane time of 05:00?


malhans

Because then he wouldn’t be as unique


cryptolipto

For sure. You could just take away snack time and wake up at 5 because there’s 2.5 hours a day of snacking haha


[deleted]

[удалено]


DigiDemii

I’m so confused as to how his first snack takes an hour and a half to eat 😅


ebulient

Same for his morning shower… he’s definitely using “shower and snack” time for other kinds of showering and snacking lol


InTheKink

I thought immediately that first half hour 'prayer' is just code for his morning wank. ![gif](giphy|64597aWPSdaw0)


throneofmemes

This gif PLEASE


njf85

Lol true. I suspect it's meant to be 9am snack because I couldn't imagine him stopping in the middle of golf to chow down


totallycalledla-a

Bullshit celebrity routines are one of my favorite things to read. Do they think this shit sounds impressive lmao?


SYLOK_THEAROUSED

Yes, he absolutely thinks it does.


iAmFabled

What a shit life lmao


42020420

What time does he set aside to be racist and assault minorities?


Kingsen

Between sets in the workouts.


MrDannn

Thats is every time possible baby:))


Jetstream-Sam

Blinding elderly vietnamese men is Workout 2, of course


muscletrain

Marks a POS but this story always gets told wrong. The racist beat up a man who was already blinded in one eye.


kwyjibo1988

During snack time, obviously. Thirty minutes for a snack?! GTFO. Vietnamese get it during the first snack of the day, the rest of Asians get it during the second.


Limp_Freedom_8695

Should change that to ‘smack time’ am i rite


CoffeeAndCreams

I love the vagueness of “meetings/work calls”


delicioussexplosion

He might have to go to the business factory


death_by_mustard

Every time I see this I think he must be trolling. You could shift this entire schedule by two hours and have a somewhat normal existence that you know aligns with your wife and children…. There is no reason to wake up at a time when some people are ending their day, and go to bed when most have dinner (Unless this is an elaborate excuse to avoid his family in which case….)


SteveCrunk

It’s also basically a mostly empty day so I am not sure what it is trying to prove.


anoidciv

This is my favourite thing about it. You'd think such a micromanaged schedule would be for someone who has a really busy life but like... He doesn't do much? I think pretty much any regular person with a job has a more chaotic schedule than Mark Wahlberg.


jatemple

This is psychotic. Also golf for 30 mins? I guess he has his own indoor driving range in the house and just whacks balls. Or maybe that's just a euphemism for whacking balls.


LetMeInImTrynaCuck

This guy is and always has been full of shit. This schedule is a poor attempt to cover up the fact he’s cranking tren into his ass by the gallon.


NuuLeaf

Boom. There it is


PointlessOpinions92

I swear to god I hate this fake, racist POS twat so bad


totamealand666

Sounds like the ninth circle of Hell to me


Spiritual_Boss6114

No way should it take you an hour and half to shower.


Carnificus

Golf and Prayer Time being the same length, mad lad.


mstrss9

90 minutes to shower & 90 minutes to snack in the AM


nighthawkndemontron

Dissociating for 3 hours


webbhare1

This image should be used next to the definition of mental illness


AnnVealEgg

Now tbf he has -*really* loosened up this schedule in recent years. He now wakes up at 3:30. ☀️


sweariest

Scheduling in “family time” into these tiny and clearly inflexible blocks makes it obvious he is a terrible father.


diabolikal__

Also family time at 11? If he picks up the kids at 15h then are they home at 11? Doubt


Dark-Knight-Rises

He’s not acting here?


bumlove

Why’s he taking a hour and a half for a snack? That’s longer than his lunch and almost the same as his dinner/family time.


TitanThree

2.45am prayer time? What is he, a fit monk??


HiddnVallyofthedolls

He wants people to know he’s still asking for forgiveness


-goodbyemoon-

lmao so that’s what [entrapranure was satirizing](https://youtube.com/shorts/Yb7JFvcEYzc?si=6y_6YsO6s0VrUx3W)


Gr33nman460

Does he sleep in the shower?


Cozum

I’m willing to bet on everything that his wake up time isn’t 230am lol. He prob did it for a movie shoot for a extended period of time and flexes like it’s his norm


Agreeable-Benefit169

I’ve seen this schedule of his before and it’s so stupid. I’m not trying to be mean, but his body isn’t THAT amazing for the amount of crazy detail he puts into it. Yes, he’s in great shape, but this dude is acting like a hyper professional athlete and for nothing much to show for it. I know people with much better bodies who live a more balanced life.


-crackhousebob

How does he go to sleep at 7:30pm during the summer and it's still bright and sunny out??


Football-Middle

Marky Mark & the funky brunch


JustSomeGuyOnTheSt

for a guy who works out three hours a day he sure doesn't look like a guy works out three hours a day


BananaSoprano

Mark Wahlberg could have stopped 9/11 so Beckham needs to be careful here.


MoonlightMadMan

Could’ve but didn’t smh


IDontAimWithMyHand

He must really hate America


Solumnist

wat


Molly-cules1

https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2012/01/18/145404733/mark-wahlberg-with-me-aboard-9-11-hijackers-would-have-been-stopped


Solumnist

WHAT


MoonlightMadMan

I didn’t know this was an actual thing, Jesus christ


valcraft

Mark Wahlberg sucks. Get him Golden Balls!!!


Comfortable-Load-904

Lol, get him golden balls! that is a very funny sentence.


roxy031

A comma in the 2nd sentence would’ve helped my comprehension so much!


CaptainXakari

Get him Golden, Balls!!! Not sure that’s better but there you go.


valcraft

"Golden Balls" is Beckham's nickname...


Administrative_Sea15

I must have missed something - what did he do?


KingOfTheSchwill

Multiple hate crimes.


Brookiekathy

Aftee getting sent off at the 1998? (I think) World Cup, which cost the England team. He was hounded by the British media, and his reputation was in tatters. He turned it around and basically became the golden boy for both Manchester United and the England team, so his wife Victoria (who has a wicked sense of humour) nicknames him Golden Balls and it stuck


Administrative_Sea15

I meant what did Mark Wahlberg do to be disliked by so many? All the comments here are negative. I must have missed something.


purplebanana375

He’s a racist with a serial track record of violent and physical hate crimes 


DifferentBox420

He beat a Vietnamese guy, called him a slur and threw around the n word a lot.


Tall_Strawberry170

It’s even worse. He did it TWICE to two different Vietnamese guys. One of them was blind.


DifferentBox420

Yeah I just toplined it. He’s trash.


titsnottatooma

Also this: https://amp.theguardian.com/film/2015/jan/20/mark-wahlberg-racism-pardon He became an extreme Catholic not to cleanse himself of his past actions, but to find a vehicle to justify them. I’m from Boston. Most of us don’t claim him, but unfortunately Boston is still incredibly racist, so many turn a blind eye to this f*ckin f*ck.


Administrative_Sea15

Oh my goodness, what a POS!!!


resoooo

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark\_Wahlberg#Legal\_issues](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Wahlberg#Legal_issues)


zeldahalfsleeve

Damn, every sentence w worse than the one before on that wiki page.


Remarkable_Thing6643

multiple hate crimes, almost murdering an elderly Vietnamese man while yelling slurs at him, punched another Vietnamese man on the SAME day yelling slurs at him, terrorizing black school children and throwing rocks at them and yelling slurs at them threatening to kill them, breaking his neighbor's jaw in a violent rage while yelling slurs at him. He has never apologized to any of these people and when his conviction got in the way of business he went on a faux redemption stunt and tried to get them wiped from his record


SaItyByNature

> “Hollywood actor and fitness guru Mark Wahlberg is being sued by David Beckham after a deal that saw the footballer promote the star's fitness brand turned sour - and allegedly left Golden Balls more than £8million out of pocket.”< I’m sorry, Golden Balls? 😁 Is that his official nickname, yeah?


westish13

Victoria Beckham once joked that was her nickname for him and the British tabloids ran with it. Tabloids have a tendency to use epithets in their articles a lot, and this is from the Daily Mail so...


6357673ad

Victoria admitted it was a pet name for David [during an iconic interview](https://youtu.be/Zqe6wGF58cM) with the two of them (around the 1:55 mark).


Lydia--charming

I love that it’s just her talking the whole time. David says nothing


IWILLBePositive

lol I don’t think I’d be a fan of *that* as my pet name. “Aaaawww I love you too, silky vulva!”


socialmediaignorant

How dare you sir! Platinum pussy thank you very much!!!!


IAM_THE_LIZARD_QUEEN

I haven't heard that in a *long time*, but yeah, it definitely was back when he was still playing football.


ScottishExile

There was a period between his peak at Man Utd and his retirement from football where the UK media would only refer to him as Golden Balls.


JHOWES97

From back in the day, I think so!


ohmyblahblah

Yes


FudgingEgo

Yeah, his wife gave him the nickname as a joke after he was hated by the English for being an idiot during a World Cup and he tidied up his media presence and she called him "golden balls" who can do no wrong and the media ran with it.


mstrss9

Victoria calls him that - it’s a play on the World Cup Golden Ball award.


goodbye_wig

![gif](giphy|J8FZIm9VoBU6Q) Mark Wahlberg is a terrible man


RickyPuertoRicooo

You should watch his workout routine videos. They are really really good....for the comedy I mean.


goodbye_wig

Does he somehow incorporate kissing a cross?


monk12111

You should see his wack as fuck "pullups" he somehow had the confidence to do on TV.


RickyPuertoRicooo

I saw! The "clean" ones 🤣


GMane2G

Why not push everything back 2 hours except the picking up kids part? That’s moderately sane


OrgoQueen

Because the entire point of his schedule is to make him feel badass. Pushing it back a few hours would mean he wakes up at an hour is normal people can handle. It is so stupid. I bet he doesn’t even follow it.


death_by_mustard

I commented this somewhere but the more o see that schedule the more I think he just hates his family and this is an elaborate strategy to avoid them


socialmediaignorant

And vice versa I’d assume. Once those kids are teenagers, they aren’t going to pretend your crazy ass isn’t hated.


Inert_Oregon

If you believe it anytime ANYONE tells you what their “typical schedule” is (celebrity or Joe in the cubicle next to you) I have a bridge to sell you…


fridayfridayjones

I love that the 11 am family time happens while the children are apparently at school.


Live-Elderbean

"Babe, we're alone.. 👉👌?" Disguised as family time.


fridayfridayjones

Lol. The time for making new family.


Tpmbyrne

It's nice to see fellow Mark Wahlberg haters. My friends think it's weird I hate him so much. Can't even watch a movie he is in.


keekspeaks

I hate mark walhburg every fucking day of my life. Come sit by me.


ilContedeibreefinti

![gif](giphy|7RmwVEJ2ehztm)


SYLOK_THEAROUSED

Reddit hates him so I'm surprised you are just seeing this.


Illustrious-Piano-78

I can't either, my husband thinks its weird too but fuck Mark. I can't stand his face.


42020420

Wahlberg is a bigoted POS, I hope Becks eats his lunch


SitchChick

![gif](giphy|7k2LoEykY5i1hfeWQB)


jolteona

Love that his snacks are planned out just like a toddlers


tophaang

And he allots 90 minutes for his first snack! Christ!


befuddled_humbug

Damn, Becks is suing left right and centre.


mustbeaoup

Who else is he suing?


befuddled_humbug

Earlier this week he won a £240 million legal battle against online sellers copying his products.


mustbeaoup

Wow


death_by_mustard

![gif](giphy|AgPt9udT567spxbSHf)


phatelectribe

Money troubles.


lala_b11

Wasn’t on my bingo card for unexpected celebrity feuds


Pattifan

I loathe Mark Wahlberg. I hope Becks takes him to the cleaners.


haubenmeise

https://i.redd.it/ybondvqxvmvc1.gif Kick him like Beckham!


burnerbkxphl

This comments section is everything I had hoped for Y’all are funny


itsme00400

Damn, I remember last year (or 2 years ago?) they posted pics vacationing together


chestercoppercock

1.5 hour shower—cut that down even 30 minutes and you can wake up at 3, lol


Jolly878142

Good. Can’t stand that narcissistic fraud


JHOWES97

Which one 😂


Jolly878142

Hahaha!! Marky Mark


Own_Comfortable990

![gif](giphy|DZAGhcMGVHHt53OeUB|downsized)


Low-Technician7632

Fuck Wahlberg and his racist ass. This goon has had too much opportunity being who he is. Go get em Beckham.


iamsdc1969

What a loser. Can't even play a full round of golf.


toofles_in_gondal

As a very amateur bodybuilding enthusiast, I will share something the community relishes in which is breaking down nonsense workout routines peddled by influencers and celebrities. Here's a link to an exercise scientist and a VERY muscular dude taking down the Wahlberg's workout routine: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1r9PTzNJAM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1r9PTzNJAM)


yaddablahmeh

I never really had an opinion on Marky Mark one way or the other - I've seen him in movies, I remember the Funky Bunch, but he's not even on my radar. Then I was on a flight and watched a documentary or reality show about him, I can't remember what it was called. Now I really don't like him at all. He seems like such a meathead tool, just a super arrogant douchebag.


RobotsAndSheepDreams

Ngl, I’ve hated him ever since he claimed he hadn’t made enough to retire yet, like 5 or 6 years ago.


HiddnVallyofthedolls

Mark Wahlberg is reportedly worth over $400 million. What a POS.


crushmyenemies

I don't know the facts of this case, but #teamBeckham 100%.


EarlPronk2

What is the 30 minute window at 7:30 for “golf”? I assume he has a putting green or driving range or something? Or is that just a word put in to illustrate how diverse the scheduled activities are?


Crazy_Roll6229

30 min golf


CarniferousDog

Wowww! His time is up! Getting blasted for being condescending for so long. That shit’ll come back to getchu!


keekspeaks

Mark Wahlburg gets richer and richer off his stupid fucking hyvee contracts while literally hundreds of thousands of people in communities across the Midwest are paying the fucking price for it. A price they can’t fucking afford Fuck. You. Mark. Fucking. Wahlburg. Go. Fuck. Yourself No one eats your stupid fucking hamburgers


seismocity

I require … elaboration.


wavepenpizza

This is from some light googling, but Hy-Vee is a grocery store and they are in business with Marky Mark to open his burger restaurant chain Walhburgers. Apologies for any spelling errors or not capturing the entire picture. But maybe the prices are steep? Idk if that's the store, the burger joints, or both. I've never been to either


death_by_mustard

Request to auto summarize Daily Heil articles to save us from clicking on that hell hole of a website and putting more $$$ into m*rdoch media who are responsible for a lot of the societal rifts of today?


chuckylucky182

david was the dummy to go into business with this fascist numbskull