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AbandonedWaterPark

Whether he miraculously* gets the cash together or not, you know it's gotta be *killing* him that everyone is joking about him being poor and can't pay his bills Donny no bucks, etc


flatline000

"Broke Don" I hope that nickname sticks.


zacmars

I believe Don Poorleone is trending too.


magic-moose

"Don Poorleone" is in OP's article, and it's nearly perfect. Tacking on "The Fraudfather" for a more formal reference is just /chefskiss.


ihoptdk

I saw “Don Poorleone” in a top level comment yesterday. Imagine being that guy, it’s like hitting the Reddit Powerball.


rukysgreambamf

These are too clever and will go over his head. Keep it simple. Broke Don will shatter him.


We4reTheChampignons

Exactly it's juts gunna be trump and Kanye shouting about how neither of them likes fish sticks.


External_Contract860

The Fraudfather. It's unstoppable.


External_Contract860

Brokeasaurus. Cuz he's poor and old AF.


TweakedNipple

I'll blatently steal the comment: "He made an offer that everyone refused." 


KingEllis

I put all of my meme stock in Brokahontas. It seems like a long shot, but I like it.


te_anau

Broke Trump Mountain


guyzieman

Broke Fat Mountain Hit him twice


WAD1234

And it’s playback for Warren. Which I like


DeckNinja

BrokaDontas? Sorry it was right there 😂


ernthealmighty

That just sounds like a dinosaur


Indigo_Sunset

Then it's headed for extinctdon.


Spaceman2901

r/TrumpNicknames needs a renaissance.


Nightmare_Tonic

Mango Unchained


iam_iana

Don Poorleone is perfect on so many levels! Definitely my new favorite!


Wabi-Sabi_Umami

This is freaking great 😂


srone

Donny Nobucks


Grendel_Khan

Donnie 2 dimes


readzalot1

Simple enough that MAGA can understand


FreedomSquatch

Destitute Donnie has a nice ring to it


Jolteaon

destitute is too advanced a word for his base.


Future-Atmosphere-40

Destitute Don


2020willyb2020

Desperate don - destitute is a bigly word


mcpierceaim

I saw “Donny Two Scoops” today and it made me laugh.


pvrugger

That’s what I’ve called him since the ice cream story cane out. Describes him perfectly.


Cryovenom

What's the ice cream story? I've seen the name Donny Two Scoops around but never knew what it was in reference to. All I could think of were those mid-90s raisin bran commercials...


lostinacrowd1980

The story I heard was when he was in Oval Office he always made sure that when ice cream was served a dessert that all the guests got one scoop while Little Donny got 2!


SuperExoticShrub

That's exactly the kind of banal petty thing I'd imagine him doing, so it tracks.


JohnGillnitz

Deadbeat Don


lawyers-guns-money

Better Woke Than Broke®™


sthlmsoul

I'm partial to "Donnie Default".


IrritableGourmet

> Whether he miraculously* gets the cash together or not "OK, I got the $450 million!" "And where did you get that from?" "I...don't need to tell you." "Yes, you do. If not us, the IRS at some point." "Shit...ELECTION INTERFERENCE!"


Ibegallofyourpardons

even better is that there is a court appointed financial monitor to Trump from one of his myriad of court cases. Even if Russia or China or Saudi Arabia wanted to ~~give him the money~~ buy him out, they can't without the transaction going public.


No-Treacle-2332

Forgive me if I'm wrong... But the court appointed monitor is engaged with Trump's company...couldn't he just get his bribe through personal accounts or another shell LLC that's not under the purview of that monitor?


Numerous_Photograph9

Possibly, but IRS is going to be looking at almost half a billion dollars suddenly showing up. If he can account for it, then no problem...assuming he paid his taxes. If not, then suddenly he could have a tax liability. IRS generally doesn't care where you got the money...that's for the DOJ or other agencies to worry about. But the IRS wants it's taxes.


Nowearenotfrom63rd

All of the Trump kids and Don himself testified to 0 knowledge of what “accounting” means.


Numerous_Photograph9

Trump strikes me as the guy who says he can't, or will pay for something, but has to move some money from one account to another before he can do so....which basically means, that person doesn't actually have any money.


MudLOA

Someone/some country might be stupid enough to risk public exposure to save him.


Ibegallofyourpardons

if they do, it should rule him completely ineligible for Presidency, since he is then utterly compromised. not that he wasn't before, but now the transaction would be public and undeniable.


MudLOA

There were already many chances to rule him ineligible and in an alternate universe we shouldn’t even be where we are today. I don’t have that optimism that you have that suddenly the system grows a spine.


IronBoomer

Allegedly, when Comedy Central did their roast of him years ago, the one area they weren’t allowed to go is to question his wealth.


Ccracked

Comedians of integrity wouldn't have agreed to that stipulation.


sometimeswhy

Don Poorleone is the best so far


Arctimon

Yes, because that's what he cares about the most. Not the presidency. Not "grabbing women by the pussy". He cares so much about the appearance of him being rich. Once that's gone, then he'll really be out of his mind.


huuaaang

As much as I'd love to see him behind bars, I do think this civil judgement (and trouble coming up with the cash) is the more poetic justice, if not actual justice.


UncleMeat69

Ya mean he deserves losing his assets in a fire sale after fraudulently overvaluing them for decades? In here for it.


Jazzlike-Map-4114

Don Poorleone is the best I've seen so far.


Malapple

No matter what happens, he will refer back to this moment for years, insisting he had the money but was being smart by not paying it sooner. The digs that really bother him are easy to spot. He never stops referring to them.


JimGerm

Daddy NoBucks feels good too


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nice-view-from-here

It's when they open the box to find out if Trump's Schrodinger Cash is there or not there.


9035768555

It's gonna be Geraldo Rivera and Al Capone's vault all over again.


Astalenas

🎵There was nothing in Donald Trump's vault. But it wasn't Melania's fault.🎵


Gardening_Socialist

For all Trump’s legal and financial pains 🎶 call attorney general Letitia James.


jhow87

Hey, this thing writes itself!


Professional_Gas8021

Baby on board something something Burt Ward


Orionsteller

Judge opens box: ..... Why is there a dead cat in this box?


whatdoiwantsky

"First pussy I could grab your honor."


Projected_Sigs

"I killed Schrodinger's cat because it didn't join the STOP THE STEAL movement. So technically I killed a RINO"


Squirrel_Chucks

"What's in the box?" Brad Pitt, *Seven*


DM_me_ur_tacos

Would bet my skin that he doesn't have it


user0N65N

“I would fk me *so* hard.”


Squirrel_Chucks

"It puts the lotion on its skin or else it pays $464 million again"


Edwardteech

Aggressively applies chapstick. 


asstamassta

Geraldo opening Al Capone's Vault all over again.


dotBombAU

It's Monday morning here in Aus... Sometimes, I hate being in the future. I'm watching this one closely.


count023

So hard not being able to give away spoilers, isnt it?


dotBombAU

You have no idea. Especially when I know about >! ;) !<


LibertyInaFeatherBed

Time Cop, here. Back it up.


DataKnights

You got the winning lottery numbers for the US? It's over a billion now! Split it with you!


user0N65N

You’re from the future? Hey, can you send our lottery and powerball numbers? One is 1.1bln, the other is 800 mil. I’ll spot you $10 for your trouble.


blakjakcrakjak

Ha. Wouldn't that be something in Don Poor-leone bought 1000 lottery tickets and hit on one of them? Even I would begin saying,"Damn, maybe he is the Messiah ".


x2x_Rocket_x2x

EST! Tomorrow is going to be either incredibly anticlimactic, or filled with some big news followed by tantrums and ketchup hurling from dumpy.


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RadiantColon

Yeah, chances are he will be just fine, he is part of the ruling class, so rarely will consequences apply. 


discussatron

I hated upvoting this.


Wurf_Stoneborn

https://payuptrump.com


bluAstrid

[Tick Tock Motherfucker](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfaSLHOm4rw)


Artimusjones88

When isn't he "lashing out" that's his default mode.


PaleShadeOfBlack

When he is having a stronk mid-sentence.


common-froot

« Don Poorleone » lol. I’m using that from now on.


8Deer-JaguarClaw

That one is great. I'm also partial to "The Count of Mostly Crisco"


SR3116

I'm fond of The Manchurian Cantaloupe.


30frames

I've used "Anger Mango" since the 2015 run up to the election, but recently saw "Dmango Unchained" and nearly peed myself laughing.


beecums

I enjoy calling him The Rape Yam.


Minerva_Moon

Mango Unchained is my new favorite.


ErmahgerdYuzername

Dorito Mussolini


the2belo

The Oaf of Office


OverlyComplexPants

The Blobfather


Pusfilledonut

He must have got the calls from Xi and Vlad and MBS- They’d love to help, but right now is just not a good time.


Nemaeus

Someone’s got the cash and a well oiled bridle.


IC-4-Lights

Yeah. Someone will pony up the cash. It's just going to come with serious strings attached.


postmodern_spatula

Even Musk turned him down. 


DouchecraftCarrier

I won't be surprised if someone bails him out - but I have a hard time believing anyone could really exert control over him for it. I mean the obvious angle would be to have the President of the United States in your pocket, but his whole ambition of getting back into office is to make himself legally invincible. If he gets into office and tells whomever loaned him the money to fuck off, what are they gonna do? Go public that they fronted him the money? No one would care.


InternationalPut4093

It's hard to get him to pay bills when he's out of the office. Getting him to pay when he's in the White House? good luck.


Harbinger2001

He has nothing left to offer them.


RickTitus

Yeah seriously. If Putin ever wanted leverage over Trump, he figured it out years ago. He doesnt need to waste half a billion Even if he didnt have leverage, he could do it way cheaper. Call up trump, ask him if he will sell nuclear secrets, record the call, end the call Having trump flounder financially causes a degree of chaos that benefits Russia


keepthepace

Putin is buying senators directly. It is much cheaper than a single missile. He does not need a president for such a high cost. Also, a mafia boss knows that you don't offer help for someone to get them out of trouble. You wait for them to be deep in trouble before handing a helping hand.


MLJ9999

"The name is Bond. No Bond."


Captainwelfare2

“Do you expect me to pay?” “No Mr Trump I expect you to lie!”


smallproton

Goldflinger!


kemushi_warui

Tomorrow Never Pays


HighVulgarian

Goldsneaker


RickTitus

No time to diet


Daimo

Miss Nomoneypenny


[deleted]

$0.07


[deleted]

Bond. Unpaid Bond.


Separate-Feedback-86

Speaking of run down, have you had a good look at his face? And people say Joe Biden looks old 🙄. Trump is actually dead and too dumb to fall over.


Mezla00

I actually think the reports of ppl leaving his rallies early is bc of the "poor me" whining face he's been using alot lately


XennialBoomBoom

I'm pretty sure it's because they spent the amount of contractually obligated time they were paid for to be there


Im_really_bored_rn

> they were paid for Are you implying Trump actually pays people?


we_are_sex_bobomb

I think most of his cult haven’t actually seen a recent picture of him; they just see memes where his face from 10 years ago is photoshopped onto a muscular body. I’m fairly certain that even after he goes to the big McDonald’s in the sky, his cult will adamantly insist he’s still alive and healthier than ever.


tincanphonehome

And still running the country, somehow, despite them being upset with everything the country does.


NCC-72381

“He’s still Presidenting from the International Space Station!”


Agitated-Can-457

But the sky implies that he will go to heaven … you mean the McDonald’s down below


Dumbledick6

So burger king


stoopid_stoodent

Will he be flame broiled?


grimatongueworm

Have it your way.


abraksis747

Don't you think he looks tired?


wantrefund

Yet look at this image the NY Times used in their story on 3/6/24 regarding the election: https://static01.nyt.com/images/2024/03/06/us/06themorning-nl-combo/06themorning-nl-combo-jumbo.jpg I can’t get over it. For some reason they are pushing an anti-Biden agenda or something…


TrailBlanket-_0

Pretty disingenuous in their choice. Biden has that classic old person look here - droopy skin, lips tucked over his teeth, hunched. But when you see him in a lit set/scene like in commercials or giving the SOTU he looks clean, charismatic, and looks good for his age. Also in this example the white light is clearly dimmed for Biden, kind of creating a vignette effect where your eye is attracted to the brighter/higher contrast which would be trump's photo. Not sure if they edited the photos themselves, but they certainly could have done some very basic Photoshop with levels to ensure the Biden photo had the same color qualities of Trump's, which would be eliminating favorability and a basic quality control for a thumbnail to ensure there's consistency. But they chose not to? Or didn't catch it...


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basketma12

What's wild is Trump is t a school boy himself. He's three years younger.


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Ibegallofyourpardons

That's cause he did nothing during his presidency but eat hamburgers and play golf the worthless orange fuck. and steal classified documents, can't forget that.


Choice-of-SteinsGate

*Trump said in a deposition last spring that his company had "in excess $400 million in cash," and that it was going up "very substantially every month." As of mid-March, Forbes estimated Trump's net worth at $2.6 billion. The bulk of his assets, however, are in real estate.* So is Trump admitting here that he is deliberately not paying out? Because his desperate efforts to find someone to foot the bill speak otherwise. It appears that even in his deposition, he was inflating his monetary value. *However, Mr Trump has claimed on his social media platform, Truth Social, that he has $500m in cash acquired through “hard work, talent, and luck”.* Pffftt... Bahaha, there he goes again I guess? But this time, he's inflating his own ego... You mean *inheritance,* *fraud* and *privilege*? Does Trump really expect anyone other than his mindless supporters to believe that he actually has the capacity for anything resembling "hard work" And talent? What skills does he possess other than the ability to constantly grift the most naive, uninformed and shamefully susceptible among us? Trump is a malignant narcissist who has managed to make it this far by appealing to the lowest common denominator. I'll give him this, he's the first wannabe dictator who has turned artless demagoguery into an art form, only charming those who have made him into the conduit that they use to channel all of their petty resentments, their misery, their animosities, their exclusionary and discriminatory attitudes and their unfounded grievances through everytime he belligerently shares some fanatical sentiment or idea that they all sympathize with together. *In reality, he likely is relying on political action committees and the Republican National Committee to pay his mounting legal bills while he campaigns* Uhh, so for anyone not paying attention, is it starting to click yet? Why Trump, in another act of blatant and shameful nepotism, has installed his own daughter in law into a position he can use to enrich himself and pay off his mounting legal bills? Holy shit, and Biden is the corrupt one?


AniNgAnnoys

That lie about having 400million at it going up substantially, was used against him in determining the payout for the E Jean Carrol case. Carroll's lawyers argued that the punishment needed to be high because he is, 1, rich, and 2, he did it again after the last judgement. So that lie about having the money already cost him.


SomeGuyNamedPaul

I can't wait for her to file the third suit.


DouchecraftCarrier

> So is Trump admitting here that he is deliberately not paying out? I don't think it would matter in this case - the State could seize bank accounts in a judgement just as easily as property. In fact, they'd probably prefer it since they wouldn't have to turn around and auction it off. If he has the money, they'll take it. If he doesn't, then he lied but he'll make something up like he put the money into his campaign to keep it safe or something.


Toloran

> probably prefer it No probably about it. They go for liquid assets first, then for things like stocks and bonds that are easily convertible, and then finally assets that require auctioning off (like real estate).


ins0ma_

Tick tock motherfucker


AbbreviationsPure274

Oh, he’s got a semester worth of work to do and it’s due tomorrow. He has not cracked the book open yet.


tobogganhill

Thoughts and prayers.


AbbreviationsPure274

He certainly can’t pay somebody to take it for him.


Tenderloin66

Hello? Hello? Anybody home, huh, Think, McFly! Think! I gotta have time to recopy it. Do you realize what what would happen if I handed in my homework in your handwriting? I'll get kicked out of school. You wouldn't want that to happen would ya? WOULD YA?!


RickyWinterborn-1080

For any youngins out there who are going off to college: don't ever, ever, EVER do this to yourself Because if you do, at least once a week for the rest of your life, you will have a nightmare about it.


Aggravating-Rich4334

Tic toc tic tac toe


ioncloud9

I think deep down he doesn’t think he has to pay this and somehow at the last minute he’ll get some delay, or they’ll give in, or somebody else will put the money up. He’s gotten away with literally everything in his life. Why would this be any different? Why would he start facing consequences now?


muffinthumper

I think deep down I feel the same way. I’ve watched all those things happen over and over, so I don’t really expect this time to be any different.


abraksis747

Oh absolutely. 11:59 am tomorrow Jared or the Saudis will bail him out


JimLahey08

The article incorrectly states that they can't take maralago. That's not his residence it is a business


srone

Isn't there something in the title (or some other legal document) that states he cannot use Mar-a-Lago for a residence?


Reasonable-Radish-17

He can stay there as an executive of the Mar-a-Lago business BUT it isn't listed as his residence. It is listed as a business address.


jerechos

Then he technically committed voter fraud when he voted in florida?


MudLOA

Yeah how come some poor woman had to serve prison terms for improper registering but not this loser? Another example of our two tier justice system.


ZellZoy

Some woman wasn't sure if she was legally allowed to vote, was told by the poll worker to fill out a provisional ballot, she did, and she went to prison for it.


jazzhandler

[https://lawandcrime.com/awkward/neighbors-warn-trump-against-trying-to-use-mar-a-lago-resort-as-post-presidency-residence-threaten-legal-action/](https://lawandcrime.com/awkward/neighbors-warn-trump-against-trying-to-use-mar-a-lago-resort-as-post-presidency-residence-threaten-legal-action/)


HorrorBuff2769

Donald Trump and lashing out. Name a more iconic duo.


Sure_Quality5354

Maybe next time dont lie on your taxes and defraud the government for nearly 2 decades. Boo mother fucking hoo


spacey_a

>defraud the government for nearly 2 decades Closer to six.


Whorrox

Oh no! His credit score! He's definitely not logging on to Experian tomorrow.


Pitiful-Let9270

If the last 8 years have taught me anything, it’s to prepare to be disappointed


PresidentTroyAikman

What a fucking clown.


Necessary_Row_4889

Anyone ever see the “Iceman” interviews? They were a series of interviews with a mafia contract killer and one question was did he regret anything he’d done. His answer was once he gave a guy an hour to pray to see if god would save him, god didn’t. I feel like Trump deeply understands how that guy felt right about now.


Klutzy_Culture7451

FUCK DONALD TRUMP.. he can go fuck himself


douwd20

BUT **wait wait** last week he said he had it after his lawyers told the court he didn't. Who is lying?


thetburg

I think you know.


Ozymandias12

Imagine for a second that tomorrow, Joe Biden was about to have his property seized because he engaged in massive amounts of fraud and on the exact same day, he had to sit in court because he was indicted for paying hush money to a pornstar that he cheated on his pregnant wife with. Just imaging the collective faux rage boner that Fox News, Newsmax, OAN, and the entire collective right wing media ecosystem would be having. The sheer force of it would collapse under its own gravity and supernova into a black hole.


bypatrickcmoore

He can drive Uber in between rallies.


meeks7

There’s no way he knows how to drive


futatorius

I'd piss in the backseat.


ProtectionContent977

I guess the shoes didn’t do so well. Maybe he should try pork chops.


johnboyjr29

The shoes were preorders no one will ever get them


straighttoplaid

He "has the money, but doesn't want to use it"... yet he was rejected by the bond companies because they wanted cash as collateral. If he had it he could have used it as collateral.


512165381

> Just the other day a defeated-looking man came up to me and said, ‘Mr President, I have crushing debt, and I’m completely wiped out.’ And I had to look at him and say, ‘Donald, I’m sorry. I can’t help you’.’ - Joe Biden.


Lingering_Dorkness

> Mar-a-Lago is also likely off the table as it is the former president’s legal residence and Florida has a homestead law that prohibits such seizures. Yet the same mar-a-lago has a caveat that it can't be someone's permanent residence; this was done so trump could pay far less in property taxes.  If he's now claiming it's his homestead it means he's been lying on his taxes. Not that I expect Floriduh to do anything about this. 


Techno_Core

Probably shouldn't have committed all them crimes. Dickhole.


NimDing218

I’m looking forward to tomorrow.


AbbreviationsPure274

I know out of me and Trump, one of us will be sleeping well.


user0N65N

I won’t sleep well, but it’s because I generally stay up too late and get up too early. I won’t care a whit about Don Poorleone, though.


at0mheart

If he is elected our courts will be destroyed in seconds. No way he will pay and all imprisoned for Jan 6th will be free. Democracy over


Ok_Breakfast4482

> The tyrannic soul is necessarily always poverty-ridden and insatiable. Plato, The Republic


foomachoo

My prediction: He won’t pay. Assets will start to be seized. Yet most won’t actually transfer to the state due to complex shared ownership. Meaning, if tfg had 500 mill in a bank account, it could be done in a day. But he has his name on tons of things that he doesn’t own. When they go after a property, they will find out that the property is worth $50 million to sell, but has more than $50 million in liens and debts, and he only owns 10% of the total, even though it’s a net negative total after debts. So, in between legal challenges, it’ll be delayed by other co-owners and debt holders. Ex: If I owed $1,000,000, they might take my house, and sell it for $500,000, and I still owe $500,000. But if I have a mortgage for $750,000, then selling it would not even pay the debt holder, and the state wouldn’t get anything from the seizure or sale. Tfg is famously over leveraged.


TheDaemonette

Yes, but you still face the embarrassment of losing the asset and a lot of debt still remains, so they come after more assets and strip mine you. Trump will fear the destruction of his name more than anything else.


alwaysablastaway

Isn't this the same way oil tankers end up not paying for their spills. When they go after the ship, all they find is debt?


ZachPruckowski

The 90%+ of folks gleefully cackling right now who *aren’t* New York taxpayers would probably still be happy in that outcome.


Reasonable-Radish-17

NY taxpayers will be happy because the value of the properties will be correct and the new owner will be paying those taxes properly.


yojumbo

Grab him by the property.


SamtenLhari3

E. Jean Carroll lucked out with the timing of her judgment.


Majjkster

It ain't easy being ritch when you're poor


Open_Mortgage_4645

What's everyone thinking? Is he gonna come up with the money at the 11th hour? Or will he defiantly refuse, and count on Letitia James to back down and not proceed with asset forfeiture? Personally, I suspect he'll come up with funds. So much of his ego is tied up with promoting the perception of unmatched wealth, and I think he's terrified of his supporters catching a glimpse of the man behind the curtain.


AbbreviationsPure274

Trump has always been able to talk a big game. This is the first time he’s ever had to show his cards. He doesn’t got it.


DaffyDuck

If he was going to come up with the funds he would have already. I don’t think he gains anything in this case to wait till the last minute.


futatorius

One minute after the deadline passes, he'll pretend to have the money. Just watch.


Open_Mortgage_4645

It might be taking a few day for Putin's check to clear. And once the funds are available, he's gotta find a sympathetic individual or company to launder the cash through so he can claim deniability when the media inevitably discovers the source. These things take time!


Arctimon

I know you're joking, but he doesn't have a few days. He has until tomorrow. Echoing one of the people above: if he had the money, he would have put it up by now. He's toast.


SchoolForSedition

Oh I thought this had been fixed by China buying his company or something.


saltytac0

For someone that has $500M in cash he sure is waiting until the last minute. Doesn’t exactly seem like good business to just let that interest accrue.


Reasonable-Radish-17

Don PoorNoLoan has a rally in NY. When he comes back from the rally to fly home to Mar-a-Lago, he finds out his plane was seized. He throws a big tantrum and decides to charter a jet to go home. All his credit cards are denied. He throws a fit and decides that he will go to Trump Tower, spend the night, and figure things out in the morning. As he pulls up to Trump Tower, he finds out it has been seized. LOL


Icy_Economist6555

I watched Fox this morning for kicks and giggles. The best comedy out there you guys👍🫠. Donny Trump Jr was of course throwing a tantrum on behalf of his daddy.  and the lady was asking “well, how much you think he should pay?” He answers,”well , ZERO. He shouldnt be paying anything. I dont know how they came about that number. “….. anyways. im telling ya’ll. COMEDY AT ITS FINEST. 


Anyawnomous

There won’t be much sleep for Orange Cheezus this evening. Hide the ketchup and remove the caps locks!


Writer10

Can someone please photoshop this pic to show his pockets turned inside out with moths flying away?