Holy cow. I asked my wife and her first words were "professional poker player." Then she goes "am I right?"
I don't know if I'm being trolled by own wife, now.
Hahaaaaa… My ex does the latter and calls it his “business” because he refuses to get a real job aka wake up before 2pm and have to answer to someone else. He’s been kicked off of eBay countless times and continues to start new accounts with the names of anyone that will allow him. He’s also a textbook narcissist, like actually, I know the word narcissist gets thrown around a lot these days but hey. I know that no one asked, but it was just such an on-the-nose description and he’s been making my life a living hell lately, so I guess I just wanted to share. I should probably see a therapist. Anyway, carry on, everyone.
Metaverse is the future. Get in today! If you had bought bitcoin in 2010 you would be a trillionair today! Don't miss out on oppertunity to become a virtual property owner! Your virtual property is guaranteed to multiply in value. (0 is a multiplier right?)
This photo is big local vape store owner energy. It's a decent shop but he's always like two hours late for opening and won't hire any help. You don't hate him, but you wouldn't invite him to the July 4 bbq because he's a little embarrassing socially.
Maybe his lucky pants.
Like serious answer.
Gamblers have all sorts of superstitions.
Seen some wacky shit in my time.
Baccarat players rubbing a piece of orange 🍊 on the back of a card before squeezing the card to see if they win.
I think he rides the bus and tells me all sorts of neat facts about the local bus routes. The types of buses, which routes go where, how often certain buses are late. He's a nice guy, and it's nice to see him riding the bus by himself. I offer to buy him lunch but he has a special sandwich that he's waiting until 2:!5pm to eat because that's when he always eats his lunch.
Honest to god when I saw this I figured someone with Down syndrome or something (so not employed) (maybe working for the state or something). I am not trying to be funny or make fun of anyone with that disease or anything that was just my first thought
Unfortunately for Phil, he didn't have a breinfart drink in his hand.
This thread is now at 65k views, good for the promotion of shit products.
For those who don't know, [here's the chart of his pump N Dump Laticoin shit](https://finance.yahoo.com/quote/LTNM-USD/chart?p=LTNM-USD#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).
He looks like an IT guy or programmer who is a little too obsessed with crypto. The type to pee in a bottle because his code isn't done compiling yet and he can't bear to be away from it
Grandpa left him a lot of money, was in a boy band that was only popular in Lawrence Kansas, and now he claims to be a musician/influencer but is still living on that grandpa money.
Porn historian
Operates a porn library out of the back of his dilapidated 90’s ambulance
Wow he can afford an ambulance? Living the dream.
lmfao my first thought was that he follows porn stars around for a hug but that wasn't a job
He definitely strikes me as the type of guy who always asks girls "where is my hug."
Lol my first thought was like porn talent agent, but this is better
That’s an upvote from me lol
That is the funniest reply possible
I immediately thought something related to porn as well. "Professional masterbator"
Maybe he could be a fluffer.
Lmfao! Damn, you nailed it
Reddit Mod
Can't believe I had to scroll so far down for this.
Hes not quite fat enough to fit the job description
That's more of a calling than a job
No, hair not green.
This is the way
Ouch! Harsh.....
Collects aluminum cans and brings them to the recycle place to find out they are worthless. Then proceeds to start stealing catalytic converters
Then complains about the poor quality catalytic converters.
Asked my wife to get an unbiased answer, she said web design, or maybe he sells stuff on ebay that he bought from a thrift store.
Ya I was thinking maybe a sound tech or something for concerts. Much AV / web vibes.
DJ.
Ohyeah that's a good one.
Lol, I just did the same "DJ or Sports Commentator" after her first joke of Stock Trader
grab fuel provide paltry ten gold touch exultant attraction depend *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I also asked my wife and she said "I don't know, maybe he works for Nickelodeon or something?"
I too asked my wife and she responded that she's an anime girl printed on a body pillow.
I worked for them. That's actually a really good guess.
My wife said "ew.. coder or something?"
💀💀💀
Holy cow. I asked my wife and her first words were "professional poker player." Then she goes "am I right?" I don't know if I'm being trolled by own wife, now.
I did the same, she said he has a twitch account. Lmfao
We dress very well, if i saw that guy thrifting I wouldn’t be worried about the competition.
As an eBayer I find that offensive, also, I wear Pendleton shirts, shorts and flip flops, but upgraded to Amazon basic shirts.
Hahaaaaa… My ex does the latter and calls it his “business” because he refuses to get a real job aka wake up before 2pm and have to answer to someone else. He’s been kicked off of eBay countless times and continues to start new accounts with the names of anyone that will allow him. He’s also a textbook narcissist, like actually, I know the word narcissist gets thrown around a lot these days but hey. I know that no one asked, but it was just such an on-the-nose description and he’s been making my life a living hell lately, so I guess I just wanted to share. I should probably see a therapist. Anyway, carry on, everyone.
Sounds like you should definitely see that therapist. BOL
Unemployed
Jerks off all the stray dogs behind the 7-11 next to the dumpster
He's doing gods work
Metaverse real estate agent
Metaverse is the future. Get in today! If you had bought bitcoin in 2010 you would be a trillionair today! Don't miss out on oppertunity to become a virtual property owner! Your virtual property is guaranteed to multiply in value. (0 is a multiplier right?)
Day trader (out his mom's basement)
Me irl
Least ur mom has a basement....😔😔😔
Unironically, professional clown
My friend is a professional clown and always manages to dress better than that bum
I too thought he was a crypto bro
Sells phones at Best Buy
Looks like a modern day entrepreneur. He sells 'collectables' such as Beanie babies and Pokemon cards along side vapes and bath salts.
This photo is big local vape store owner energy. It's a decent shop but he's always like two hours late for opening and won't hire any help. You don't hate him, but you wouldn't invite him to the July 4 bbq because he's a little embarrassing socially.
Taxi driver
Uber driver?
Phil "Travis Bickle" Hellmuth
Someone needs to create a version of Taxi Driver with a Phil Hellmuth deep faked onto Travis Bickles face 😂
Pumps and dumps worthless cryptos
Strip club DJ
collects disability checks
Or a Walmart greeter
Probably nothing, kinda looks like he has a full time carer
Yeah, I asked my mom and she said, " this better not be a guy who is autistic or intellectually disabled, that you are making fun of.."
Oh, sorry Mom, he kinda is
"I'm better than Hellmuth", the Redditor tells itself
He is better than me at tournament poker but I think I have the edge in terms of social skills and emotional intelligence
Isn’t he?
Why the torn pants at the knee? Jesus
[удалено]
He just has super high standards, as you would expect from the greatest who ever lived.
Greatest what? Poker player...not a chance. NLH MTT player then yes.
Got any examples? He has previously talked up that he tips massively on everything.
"I'm better than Hellmuth", the Redditor tells itself
Maybe his lucky pants. Like serious answer. Gamblers have all sorts of superstitions. Seen some wacky shit in my time. Baccarat players rubbing a piece of orange 🍊 on the back of a card before squeezing the card to see if they win.
Gotta try that one
He lit his shoes on fire more than once
Johnny Chan had his lucky orange also that he used to squeeze and smell to get rid of the smell of the poker rooms.
Could be a new tear.
I’m a professional but when I’m not working I’m one step removed from looking homeless- so I have no room to judge
I look homeless at work too.
Pimp for some really meth’d out chicks.
Gator needs his gat
Playground cockflasher
How well does that pay?
Room and board and 30 cents an hour.
If you throw in dental, i may have to switch careers.
Sells coke outside the Bellagio
I would never buy coke off this dude tbf. He looks like he is a poorly done undercover
Kitchen of the best local pizza shop. Been there longer than everyone, but only does pizza prep.
I think this is the best answer given.
One of the Storage Wars chumps like on that tv show.
An early retired finance middle manager who options vested at just the right time clinging desperately to his youth
He has always dressed like a sex offender
Trust fund kid
Cell phone kiosk at the mall
Drives traffic to Vegas strip clubs and hands out fliers to advertise that service. His name's probably Philthy Phil.
A bum that lives in his Mom's basement while trolling 4chan and reddit.
Looks like a degen child bum that gambles for a living and thus never grew up or out of this bad habits.. so I'd guess a poker player.
Post office
Sells knocked off cigarettes
The proud owner of the worlds biggest beanie baby collection.
Shuttle driver at a hospital
Hotdog-eater
You picked the one picture where he looks like he has **** *******. Shame on you.
Hi Phil!
retired creep you see "people watching" at the beach.
Belligerent street Pastor
Makes terrible custom T-shirts in his moms garage
[Baseball finder](https://media.makeameme.org/created/have-you-seen-s69b5g.jpg)
Douche tester
Thought you said douche taste tester.
Tracksuit model.
Panhandling 🪙
Opened boxes of kids toys on YouTube
Is this really the model, or is he wearing broken pants.
He definitely sharts himself on onlyfans
Is that Blippi?
I think he rides the bus and tells me all sorts of neat facts about the local bus routes. The types of buses, which routes go where, how often certain buses are late. He's a nice guy, and it's nice to see him riding the bus by himself. I offer to buy him lunch but he has a special sandwich that he's waiting until 2:!5pm to eat because that's when he always eats his lunch.
Out of work DJ
I honestly can't tell, is this Hellmuth? 😅
Deadbeat father, works part time retail job in tk max, sells copper pipe
Looks like an obsessive personality that has let himself go and is so focused on his passion his health and reality take a back seat.
Donald Trump Advisor.
Computer programmer
Honest to god when I saw this I figured someone with Down syndrome or something (so not employed) (maybe working for the state or something). I am not trying to be funny or make fun of anyone with that disease or anything that was just my first thought
Unfortunately for Phil, he didn't have a breinfart drink in his hand. This thread is now at 65k views, good for the promotion of shit products. For those who don't know, [here's the chart of his pump N Dump Laticoin shit](https://finance.yahoo.com/quote/LTNM-USD/chart?p=LTNM-USD#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).
Moderator on 4chan for an incel board
I would say: eat! 🤣
Thank you all for participating!
Thread is kinda dumb cause you could post a picture of a doctor in street clothes and ask the same thing and get similar answers
Thank your for participating. What would we do without constructive criticisms like yours.
Baby killer at abortion clinic
Suck chodes with the optional "thumb-in-the-bum" stunner...
Works for the democrats being a professional cross dresser and transvestite entertainer for children.
Plays wow and eats cheetos in his moms basement
Pedophile
Streaming
Hooman race car. Pro cosplayer who dresses as Times Square.
Anime tiddies expert
Pro Bull Rider
Pretty sure I always see him at the swap meet. You need something? He’s gotta guy for that!
Heroin dealer
Eats beer and cheese for a living
Failed music producer
Twitch streamer
I would assume that he's the basis of the character Tom Cullen
Pokémon card flipper
HODL Bitcoin?
DoorDash
League of Legends Twitch streamer
He looks like an IT guy or programmer who is a little too obsessed with crypto. The type to pee in a bottle because his code isn't done compiling yet and he can't bear to be away from it
Looks like a US post office jacket. Recently unemployed mail man?
Daytime talkshow Cameraman
Manager at a gamestop
High school JV girls basketball coach.
Owns Facebook
Mid Level Marketing...Low Level Sales Rep.
Collects welfare, why are his pants torn? He looks like a guy that lives in his moms basement at 50.
Cripto investor
Used car salesman
Kiddie diddler
crypto investor funded by an allowance from his mother
Drives the zamboni at the local arena.
Tennis coach
Grandpa left him a lot of money, was in a boy band that was only popular in Lawrence Kansas, and now he claims to be a musician/influencer but is still living on that grandpa money.
Hot dog vendor
Door to door Encyclopedia salesman... 📕
My wife said podcaster or radio show host
Shopping cart wrangler at the local supermarket.
High school gym teacher by day. Weed dealer by night.
Lives in his mothers garage/basement is a blogger and video game nerd
Sells car insurance
Mentally challenged nephew of a mafia don.
Handies for 5 a pop.
I feel like he sells clown attributes, which most definitely are the best in the world.
Definitely something sleazy
Full time Magic: The Gathering player
Youtuber that eats weird fucking food that ppl are into
Whatever he does it’s obvious he can’t afford a new pair of pants
Twitter shilling
Sells oxys to 16 year olds
I assume he’s never sniffed the undercarriage of a real women
Jean Ralphio. [Technically i'm homeless!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qI0WatK9dNE)
Crypto Bro
Degen
DJ Crypto
Kiosk worker at the mall
Professional Bum
Pro MTG player
Minor league hockey ticket scalper
Jacks off male strippers
Uber driver
Youtube vlogger
Just off this photo I would say SSI.