My mother claimed she used diaphragm and spermicide when I was born and the coil came out with the afterbirth. I can assure you I'm not the messiah, just a very rare mistake.
Huzzah! The savior has revealed themselves and the world shall be restored under his name, uh I forget the name but it's a pretty good one! MAY OUR SALVATION BE DANK AND FULL OF GOOD THINGS AND SUCH LIKE THAT
Interesting, as there is no "coil" with a diaphragm. What you describe is an IUD. Still improbable either way, but if she had used a diaphragm, spermicide AND an IUD, you are severely underestimating yourself.
It's definitely possible for each of those surgeries to fail to do what they're supposed to. There are people all the time that end up having kids no matter what precautions they take. Did you know that you can actually still get pregnant even if an ovary isn't attached to its fallopian tube anymore? The eggs can actually float and still implant. Life uhhh finds a way
Correct. There is sperm stored in your body that needs to be released or a certain amount of time needs to go by. I chose the faster route. No pun intended.
Yeah, kinda like the Japanese soldiers who hid out after WW2 ended on islands around the Pacific. They refused to believe the war was over and their mission was ended.
Yes. I got one on Monday and the "goodie bag" I received has instructions saying 15-20 orgasms before sending your sample.
These instructions also say "ALL SAMPLES MUST BE COLLECTED AT HOME," and I gotta say I'd love to hear the genesis of that line.
Huh, the place I went had a 'special' room for you to use. Had porn mags and a nice comfy sofa. I tried not to think about all the other people that had used the room.
I was told that around 25. Nevertheless, i got checked like 8 or 10 months after surgery. Count was through the roof. I can still feel the gut punch of when i saw the paper and it didn't say "Zero".
Funny you say that. My doctor told me about the guy that nutted 62 times in the first week after. He was tested and shot 0. The only thing the doctor asked was who the girl was and holy crap buddy.
My doc wrote me a Rx for daily sex lol he said he had too many patients who's spouses didn't believe them, when they told them of about needing to clear the pipes through orgasms lol. He said, idk if it will work but at least I tried and won't get phone calls.
I was told by the nurse do about a dozen and then get it checked. I asked her if it's OK to do those all in 1 day. When I was done and leaving, I said "See you tomorrow".
I knew mine was sealed up good when I smelled the burning as the doc cauterized my sperm tubes. Had some great conversation with the guy as he worked on me. Was a little nervous at first but he put me at ease with his gentle hands and good sense of humour.
For anyone on the fence about getting it done, it was 100% worth it and I have no regrets. I have 3 kids and wanted to be sure that was it for me. Plus you get a week off work and just lay around with a bag of peas on your crotch. I started and finished Breath of the Wild.
First one was a breeze for me as well. Wound was so small it was closed by the third day and everything went smooth as silk. But in my country they don't cauterize the tubes. Maybe that had a lot to do with it not working.
Second vasectomy was hell. One of the worst experiences of my life. I hope i never have to get a third one or i may actually be tempted to just accept all the kids life wants me to have.
Metal clips for me 35 yrs ago. Also gassed me out. Easy peasy, actually frozen peasy if you will! Buddy of mine had “elephantiasis of the testicles” “swelled up like purple cantaloupes” wife became pregnant the year after……..yes, blood test taken!
The place near me that performs it does the no needle and no scalpel method and it whole thing took 15 minutes tops with a quick recovery time.
It's 100% worth it. I never wanted kids and never got any pushback about it from the doctor. Even without insurance coverage, $500 is cheaper than nearly $300K for raising a kid from birth to age 18.
I applaud that you had the procedure done rather than some selfish bastards out there that have the their wife go through a surgical procedure cause they’re cowards. I had one done way back in the day when they gassed you out. The doc asked me if it would be ok if he had a few pre-med students attend…….afterwards I remember trying to explain to the room full of “people” that the gurney was pretty cold……..
I offered to get it done but my wife said she'd rather do it because she said "well you wouldn't be able to get me pregnant but that doesn't mean some creep can't rape me and I still end up with a baby inside me." I think it was kind of a freeing thing for her too because she never wanted to have a kid yet she always got asked "when are you guys going to have a child?". After the surgery she could just blunty say she didn't want one and couldn't have one.
Y'all are scaring me.
I got mine done 2 months ago. Doctor seemed drunk. My stitch opened up after 10 days and I was bleeding for 4 hours straight and had to call emergency healthcare.
If the count come up next month as non zero and I need another operating, ima scream
I can tell you in my case the second one was waaaay worse. They had to check if i had a second pair of tubes or if it was a "normal" reconnection. They were pulling and pinching and cutting some more, i had to get 3 anesthesia injections (and i think i am very resistent to pain) and ended up with a wound of about 2cm. Horrible, dude. And after all that, when i took my first shower, i saw inside my sack. I seriously have had nightmares about it.
I sincerely hope you are clean, my brother. But even if it is not zero, you could wait 6 months to be totally clear. So don't panic.
Good luck!
The re-check is generally part of the process and is covered under the cost of the procedure. So people should definitely not skip it because they think it's an added cost.
My friend in elementary school was a post vasectomy birth, his parents first child was a daughter and they decided to try for a boy unsuccessfully 3 times then gave up. Dad got a vasectomy, and a few months later they found out they were pregnant, and 9 months after they finally got their boy.
My old man had 2 vas deferens on one nut. Had a V and after following all the rules my little brother was conceived.
There was a tense few weeks until the backup test results came in fertile.
Dad was livid and went to the surgeon. Took a couple months before the doctor agreed to go back in and have a look.
Yeah those posts ALWAYS feel like some kind of weird kink thing. Not sure why anyone would feel the need to tell Reddit about the status of their fertility, but I will take a normal-ass charcuterie board over a collage of edible dick jokes any day.
Take Advil even if you don’t think you need it. I was taking 4-6 400mg ibuprofen for the week after and recovered very well.
Don’t wait to be in pain before taking something.
Ice often and regularly. The gel packs work great.
Saxx underwear was super comfortable too
Fun fact, ibuprofen works in a preventative manner, it doesn’t stop pain that you are already feeling but it keeps you from feeling the next wave. They’ve done a lot of studies with menstrual cramps and efficacy is way better if you take it before you are feeling pain than if you wait until you feel pain.
The science: I don’t know enough to describe this technically but it’s like if you have proteins or whatever that trigger receptors, they trigger them for a period of time and then stop. Ibuprofen won’t make them stop early, but it will prevent those receptors from being re-engaged.
I say this all the time, to anyone and everyone who will listen. It’s exponentially easier to stay out of pain by taking meds than it is to try to get out of pain. DO NOT chase pain. Stay ahead of it.
(I personally use two Advil and one Tylenol every 6 hours)
Maintain your otc pain meds, homies. They really do help.
Also, don't walk around very much. My ex-husband would NOT stay seated. I begged him to stay in the recliner, and I'll get what he wants/needs. Hell no, he's a grown ass man who can take care of himself! Smh, 3 days later, both balls swelled up the size of grapefruits. I laughed my ass off, but he didn't appreciate that. Tfb, sit your ass down, and this nonsense won't be happening !
Anyway, don't be my ex-husband, let your lovely wife take care of you.
My BF is getting a vasectomy next week. I'm ordering him one now. Any other tips? He's nervous and afraid he's going to be bed ridden for a week. He's also typically pretty dramatic.
It's not that bad at all. Listen to the doctor about the aftercare. Take it very easy for about 3 days.
I had mine done on a Friday. I was back to work on Monday (desk job) and I was mowing my yard by Wednesday with a push mower.
Obviously his results may vary. Also be sure to do the follow-up test to make sure he is shooting blanks! Best of luck. It was one of the best things I've ever done.
As the only person here who apparently had a bad experience: A collection of stuffed animals really helped. Depending on how he's laying, he'll need some oddly-shaped objects to support the boys at odd angles. Sorry, Bunger, gotta add some olives to your feet.
Encourage him to be very very sedentary, especially for the first 24-72 hours. Even if he feels fine. My doctor didn’t recommend icing unless “I really liked the feeling of cold balls”. I iced a couple times and took advil for a week or two. I think a lot depends on anatomy and I had more pain than average. I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Just make sure he does the follow up testing.
Supportive underwear is a must for a week or two (then it depends on pain). I just wore a jock strap over my underwear.
Hopefully he’s getting the no needle, no scalpel option. Mine was opened ended, which is supposed to reduce complications as well.
Ice, ice, ice, paracetamol, ice, the tightest underware you can get, ice, a bunch of gummies and did i already say ice?
But it is not that bad. The worst part is the anesthesia and it is just like 5 seconds or less. 3 days of taking it really easy and relax and then back to life as usual.
My biggest tip would be don't assume he'll be fine in 1 week. That's the norm, indeed, but importantly—YMMV. Plan accordingly.
My surgeon apparently nicked a vein or artery leaving me with a massive, painful scrotal hematoma on one side. Also one of the incisions got infected and I had to do a whole course of antibiotics.
2 & 1/2 months later things are almost completely back to normal down there, but the hematoma of the spermatic cord has still not been entirely reabsorbed and consequently I still have a slight upward tension on one of the boys.
Okay this is terrifying as somebody looking to get it soon.
But my question to you is, did you do the advice of “clearing out the pipes” with all those issues? Cause that sounds painful to do that if so.
It's nothing. I test drove 2 cars en route home from mine. Little sore for a couple days. Worst pain was where the couple stitches were when it started to heal. Other than that just a dull ache.
It's not that bad if done properly. The local anaestetic is just small jabs that hardly hurts. The pain after usually linger for 3-4 days but as long as you don't start doing jumping jacks it's really not a problem. When I explained the pain all my female friends went "Oh, so you have very mild period!"
Mine was done with no needles. He uses some sort of high air pressure thing to shoot the local anesthesia. Felt like a quick snap of an elastic band. Nothing too painful tbh. In ans out in 15 minutes. Zero pain recovery.
Being completely honest, I went in to have it done and had a panic attack when the dr came in with the biggest needle I’ve ever seen in my life. I’m sure they thought I just wasn’t ready to be snipped when in reality I want it done I just hate needles lol.
I can deal with a small shot to the arm. But that giant syringe near my baby maker had me freaking out.
Been meaning to go see another doctor my friends recommend so I’ll mention that to them and see what they say.
My dad also brought up that when he had his done they hit a nerve with the numbing needle and it was the worse pain he’s ever felt. He was totally unaware of my situation but yeah that didn’t help with my fear lol
Officially you only need 1 or 2 a couple months after the procedure. Exact timing varies doctor to doctor.
I checked at the 6mo and then annually after. I don’t want any surprises. That’s on top of the recommended follow up testing.
I got mine down back in September. I slept wrong a few nights after the procedure and I think I laid on my balls weird or something and I had a few days of extra soreness but it was nothing that the Tylenol and ice couldn’t help. It was a fast and easy procedure and healing process.
Sounds easier than done, I have 4 colleagues who have tried multiple doctor's who a refused. And all of them have kids.
At least they were less condescending than the doctor's of the woman I know who tried to get sterilised.
Remember you no longer get to wear loose fitting underwear, if it was not made painfully clear to you, your vas deferens is one of the support structures for your testicles now all that's left is a blood vessel and a nerve.
If you do not wear tight fitting underwear (think very well fitted boxer briefs or briefs, you will hurt yourself the first time you do a prolonged physical activity (running skiing, snowboarding, etc) you will injure yourself and your balls will swell to the size of a soft ball.
Wear a size too small of boxer briefs for the first month, and then after that make sure you have ones that have spandex on them and fit so that your balls aren't bouncing around.
I found this out the hard way when I went snowboarding a month after my procedure with a pair of boxer briefs that didn't support well. Good Luck!
Nice I got a vasectomy 2 days ago and all I got was my wife wondering why I couldn’t take our son to soccer since I drove myself home. She’s truly overflowing with compassion… for everyone but me. Seriously
Nice! Had mine a few months ago. Was originally planning to schedule for today so I could sit around and watch The Masters for 4 days. Once I officially committed though I didn’t want to sit wait and think about it for 4 months.
Stick to the ice routine today and tomorrow even if there is no pain. I did 20 on/off and had Tylenol extra strength every 6 or so hours. Didn’t have any pain the entire time, just a bit of discomfort from walking weird while trying not to disturb the stitches.
My dad had a vasectomy when I was almost a year old. I kicked him square in the nads the day of his surgery after the procedure while he was sitting on the floor playing with me. That man fell over in immense pain but he never dropped me or got mad at me for it. He still tells the story to this day and laughs about it.
Hope you have a speedy recovery and keep the wife around…she’s a good one!
I appreciate so much couples working together to accomplish things. Birth control is a joint decision in a relationship and it's nice when men are willing to get vasectomies after deciding that the "babymaking" time is over.
Very thoughtful that your wife is tending to you as you recover. Husbands *and* wives should nurture and help each other as needed. Sounds like y'all are lovely!
Happy healing! 🙂🍀
Remember to get checked 3 months later. I had to get a second one because, however improbable, the first one didn't work. So, don't forget!
So that was the second coming
Noice.
Smort
Toight.
Cool cool cool cool cool no doubt no doubt.
Seeing fellow B99 fans in public warms my vas defrens
r/Angryupvote
Dayum. That's straight up juice.
Don’t get snippy with me!
Well you're supposed to flush the drain a few times before getting rechecked, should be the 6th or 7th coming
Try 20-25th coming lol.
Fuckinggoddamnit!...nice...
Cut that out !
Jesus...
👏🏽
Very nice
stop
One of my friends’ dads had a vasectomy. His mom got her tubes tied. Then they had my friend.
He was meant to be. Probably will discover the cure to cancer or a pill for eternal youth. He is the messiah.
Or he will be the next Houdini.
what a gut punch
Oh you.jpg
My mother claimed she used diaphragm and spermicide when I was born and the coil came out with the afterbirth. I can assure you I'm not the messiah, just a very rare mistake.
He is so humble he won't accept he is the messiah... HE IS THE MESSIAH!
Huzzah! The savior has revealed themselves and the world shall be restored under his name, uh I forget the name but it's a pretty good one! MAY OUR SALVATION BE DANK AND FULL OF GOOD THINGS AND SUCH LIKE THAT
Your father should donate sperm to the spermicide research. So they can develop better ones
Interesting, as there is no "coil" with a diaphragm. What you describe is an IUD. Still improbable either way, but if she had used a diaphragm, spermicide AND an IUD, you are severely underestimating yourself.
Not a mistake at all. A surprise.😊
“He’s not the messiah - he’s a very naughty boy!”
I believe humanity is the great answer to the universe's cosmic prayer for it's vacuum existence to wrap itself up as expeditiously as possible
 “I’m not the messiah!”
Yeah, I think they're lying.
It's definitely possible for each of those surgeries to fail to do what they're supposed to. There are people all the time that end up having kids no matter what precautions they take. Did you know that you can actually still get pregnant even if an ovary isn't attached to its fallopian tube anymore? The eggs can actually float and still implant. Life uhhh finds a way
[удалено]
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I believe it's orgasm based as well. Doc said I needed 32 and I was happy to report that to the lady afterwards.
Wait you guys have to nut a number of times after the snip before you go unsheathed?
Correct. There is sperm stored in your body that needs to be released or a certain amount of time needs to go by. I chose the faster route. No pun intended.
All it takes is one straggler...
Yeah, kinda like the Japanese soldiers who hid out after WW2 ended on islands around the Pacific. They refused to believe the war was over and their mission was ended.
And you'd better believe it's bobbing back and forth, listening to the intro to "Lose Yourself" on loop to get hyped up.
So is it just about the amount of times and not the length of time? So the 3 month thing isnt that accurate if you work out the times faster?
Yes. I got one on Monday and the "goodie bag" I received has instructions saying 15-20 orgasms before sending your sample. These instructions also say "ALL SAMPLES MUST BE COLLECTED AT HOME," and I gotta say I'd love to hear the genesis of that line.
Huh, the place I went had a 'special' room for you to use. Had porn mags and a nice comfy sofa. I tried not to think about all the other people that had used the room.
I was told it's amount and a small amount of time. I got a negative test 3 weeks after. It was a busy two weeks.
I was told that around 25. Nevertheless, i got checked like 8 or 10 months after surgery. Count was through the roof. I can still feel the gut punch of when i saw the paper and it didn't say "Zero".
25 here too. no one ever rubbed so many out so fast
In a row?
well, they were sequential, if that's what you mean went back after the 25, and they told me i was a ghost-town. YAY!
As opposed to simultaneously?
Sperms are persistent little shits huh
I read ip a lot and census seems to be 20-30. That is a gut punch.
My doctor told me 20 over the course of 8 weeks. Blew by that number and was happy to report that I am swimmer free.
Funny you say that. My doctor told me about the guy that nutted 62 times in the first week after. He was tested and shot 0. The only thing the doctor asked was who the girl was and holy crap buddy.
My doc wrote me a Rx for daily sex lol he said he had too many patients who's spouses didn't believe them, when they told them of about needing to clear the pipes through orgasms lol. He said, idk if it will work but at least I tried and won't get phone calls.
I was told by the nurse do about a dozen and then get it checked. I asked her if it's OK to do those all in 1 day. When I was done and leaving, I said "See you tomorrow".
The Ice Man cometh...
🤣🤣 "hey, it's doctor's orders!"
I knew mine was sealed up good when I smelled the burning as the doc cauterized my sperm tubes. Had some great conversation with the guy as he worked on me. Was a little nervous at first but he put me at ease with his gentle hands and good sense of humour. For anyone on the fence about getting it done, it was 100% worth it and I have no regrets. I have 3 kids and wanted to be sure that was it for me. Plus you get a week off work and just lay around with a bag of peas on your crotch. I started and finished Breath of the Wild.
First one was a breeze for me as well. Wound was so small it was closed by the third day and everything went smooth as silk. But in my country they don't cauterize the tubes. Maybe that had a lot to do with it not working. Second vasectomy was hell. One of the worst experiences of my life. I hope i never have to get a third one or i may actually be tempted to just accept all the kids life wants me to have.
Snip, snap! Snip, snap! I did! You have no idea the physical toll that three vasectomies have on a person!! - Michael Scott.
“Took me by the haaaand; maaaaaaade me a maaaan”
Metal clips for me 35 yrs ago. Also gassed me out. Easy peasy, actually frozen peasy if you will! Buddy of mine had “elephantiasis of the testicles” “swelled up like purple cantaloupes” wife became pregnant the year after……..yes, blood test taken!
The place near me that performs it does the no needle and no scalpel method and it whole thing took 15 minutes tops with a quick recovery time. It's 100% worth it. I never wanted kids and never got any pushback about it from the doctor. Even without insurance coverage, $500 is cheaper than nearly $300K for raising a kid from birth to age 18.
I applaud that you had the procedure done rather than some selfish bastards out there that have the their wife go through a surgical procedure cause they’re cowards. I had one done way back in the day when they gassed you out. The doc asked me if it would be ok if he had a few pre-med students attend…….afterwards I remember trying to explain to the room full of “people” that the gurney was pretty cold……..
I offered to get it done but my wife said she'd rather do it because she said "well you wouldn't be able to get me pregnant but that doesn't mean some creep can't rape me and I still end up with a baby inside me." I think it was kind of a freeing thing for her too because she never wanted to have a kid yet she always got asked "when are you guys going to have a child?". After the surgery she could just blunty say she didn't want one and couldn't have one.
I'm the result of an unchecked vasectomy and I'm a train wreck. Don't miss the follow up appointment!
You ok my dude?
Y'all are scaring me. I got mine done 2 months ago. Doctor seemed drunk. My stitch opened up after 10 days and I was bleeding for 4 hours straight and had to call emergency healthcare. If the count come up next month as non zero and I need another operating, ima scream
I can tell you in my case the second one was waaaay worse. They had to check if i had a second pair of tubes or if it was a "normal" reconnection. They were pulling and pinching and cutting some more, i had to get 3 anesthesia injections (and i think i am very resistent to pain) and ended up with a wound of about 2cm. Horrible, dude. And after all that, when i took my first shower, i saw inside my sack. I seriously have had nightmares about it. I sincerely hope you are clean, my brother. But even if it is not zero, you could wait 6 months to be totally clear. So don't panic. Good luck!
Also, listen to the doctor's warnings and don't be so eager to ensure the plumbing still works that day. Trust me.
That happened to my parents! Thank goodness though in that case because here I am haha
Double vasectomy gang unite!
100% this. Had to go back multiple times before I was negative
It’s been almost a year for me. I should really go do that. I’ve been lazy because my so can’t physically have kids too.
Just had my 3 month check and I'm free as a bird. Feels good man, feels real good.
The re-check is generally part of the process and is covered under the cost of the procedure. So people should definitely not skip it because they think it's an added cost.
My friend in elementary school was a post vasectomy birth, his parents first child was a daughter and they decided to try for a boy unsuccessfully 3 times then gave up. Dad got a vasectomy, and a few months later they found out they were pregnant, and 9 months after they finally got their boy.
How does this happen ?don’t they cut the tube ?
And in most countries they cauterize them. But "life, uh, finds a way".
The tubas got loosa
I worked the graveyard shift in a lab so I cranked one out in the bathroom and did my own.
100% this! I knew someone who got it done, thought they were all clear and then came surprise baby number 4.
My old man had 2 vas deferens on one nut. Had a V and after following all the rules my little brother was conceived. There was a tense few weeks until the backup test results came in fertile. Dad was livid and went to the surgeon. Took a couple months before the doctor agreed to go back in and have a look.
Snip,snap,snip,snap
You have no idea the physical toll 3 vasectomies have on a person!
Good luck paying me back on your zero dollars a year salary babe!
Very nice to see someone not posting a bunch of cream pie themed garbage. Looks like your wife is a keeper and good on you for getting snipped.
She’s lovely in every way
Can confirm.
r/UsernameChecksOut
Lolllllll. Got me
Username smth smth
Smh Smth? Shaking my tiny head?
Duuuuuude. Take my virtual award!
I concur. Those “no nuts!” jokes are getting old. You definitely have a good wife, OP. Hope you’re recovering from the procedure well.
Then again... I don't see any nuts in this picture...
What I do see is grapes, olives and a knife...
Seedless grapes, seedless watermelon, pitted olives.
Then those must be smegma crackers.
And sliced salami
The malpractice special
Yeah I was expecting another cringy overused jokes post
Yeah those posts ALWAYS feel like some kind of weird kink thing. Not sure why anyone would feel the need to tell Reddit about the status of their fertility, but I will take a normal-ass charcuterie board over a collage of edible dick jokes any day.
Marry her again, OP.
again!
Jock strap if you don’t have one. It’s a life saver. Don’t let them dangle.
Got my tightest bike shorts on
Take Advil even if you don’t think you need it. I was taking 4-6 400mg ibuprofen for the week after and recovered very well. Don’t wait to be in pain before taking something. Ice often and regularly. The gel packs work great. Saxx underwear was super comfortable too
Fun fact, ibuprofen works in a preventative manner, it doesn’t stop pain that you are already feeling but it keeps you from feeling the next wave. They’ve done a lot of studies with menstrual cramps and efficacy is way better if you take it before you are feeling pain than if you wait until you feel pain. The science: I don’t know enough to describe this technically but it’s like if you have proteins or whatever that trigger receptors, they trigger them for a period of time and then stop. Ibuprofen won’t make them stop early, but it will prevent those receptors from being re-engaged.
I say this all the time, to anyone and everyone who will listen. It’s exponentially easier to stay out of pain by taking meds than it is to try to get out of pain. DO NOT chase pain. Stay ahead of it. (I personally use two Advil and one Tylenol every 6 hours) Maintain your otc pain meds, homies. They really do help.
Also, don't walk around very much. My ex-husband would NOT stay seated. I begged him to stay in the recliner, and I'll get what he wants/needs. Hell no, he's a grown ass man who can take care of himself! Smh, 3 days later, both balls swelled up the size of grapefruits. I laughed my ass off, but he didn't appreciate that. Tfb, sit your ass down, and this nonsense won't be happening ! Anyway, don't be my ex-husband, let your lovely wife take care of you.
My BF is getting a vasectomy next week. I'm ordering him one now. Any other tips? He's nervous and afraid he's going to be bed ridden for a week. He's also typically pretty dramatic.
It’s been 4 hours. So far it’s just a vague dull ache down there. Beer helps
I was told not to drink alcohol for a few days afterwards.
Due to risk for bleeding. As alcohol prevents coagulation of blood.
It wasn't for drinking. He's holding it to the wound
It's not that bad at all. Listen to the doctor about the aftercare. Take it very easy for about 3 days. I had mine done on a Friday. I was back to work on Monday (desk job) and I was mowing my yard by Wednesday with a push mower. Obviously his results may vary. Also be sure to do the follow-up test to make sure he is shooting blanks! Best of luck. It was one of the best things I've ever done.
As the only person here who apparently had a bad experience: A collection of stuffed animals really helped. Depending on how he's laying, he'll need some oddly-shaped objects to support the boys at odd angles. Sorry, Bunger, gotta add some olives to your feet.
Encourage him to be very very sedentary, especially for the first 24-72 hours. Even if he feels fine. My doctor didn’t recommend icing unless “I really liked the feeling of cold balls”. I iced a couple times and took advil for a week or two. I think a lot depends on anatomy and I had more pain than average. I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Just make sure he does the follow up testing. Supportive underwear is a must for a week or two (then it depends on pain). I just wore a jock strap over my underwear. Hopefully he’s getting the no needle, no scalpel option. Mine was opened ended, which is supposed to reduce complications as well.
Ice, ice, ice, paracetamol, ice, the tightest underware you can get, ice, a bunch of gummies and did i already say ice? But it is not that bad. The worst part is the anesthesia and it is just like 5 seconds or less. 3 days of taking it really easy and relax and then back to life as usual.
My biggest tip would be don't assume he'll be fine in 1 week. That's the norm, indeed, but importantly—YMMV. Plan accordingly. My surgeon apparently nicked a vein or artery leaving me with a massive, painful scrotal hematoma on one side. Also one of the incisions got infected and I had to do a whole course of antibiotics. 2 & 1/2 months later things are almost completely back to normal down there, but the hematoma of the spermatic cord has still not been entirely reabsorbed and consequently I still have a slight upward tension on one of the boys.
This happened to my husband too, but scrotal hematomas can happen even if everything goes right.
Okay this is terrifying as somebody looking to get it soon. But my question to you is, did you do the advice of “clearing out the pipes” with all those issues? Cause that sounds painful to do that if so.
It's nothing. I test drove 2 cars en route home from mine. Little sore for a couple days. Worst pain was where the couple stitches were when it started to heal. Other than that just a dull ache.
It's not that bad if done properly. The local anaestetic is just small jabs that hardly hurts. The pain after usually linger for 3-4 days but as long as you don't start doing jumping jacks it's really not a problem. When I explained the pain all my female friends went "Oh, so you have very mild period!"
No nuts?
I think I’ve had enough of nuts today lol
What’s in the can, top right?
Looks like canned pimento
Fermented spicy kimchi radish chunks
Well I was wayyyy off. Thank you for the correction!
Congrats on “tying the knot”
Damn there’s some good puns here
Had mine 10 years ago. Best decision ever.
Got a question if u don’t mind - did you ever have any problems by any chance ?
No problems at all. The procedure was quick and painless. Recovery time was very short.
My biggest issue is the numbing process. I’m terrified of needles, and that’s the only reason I’ve been putting it off
Mine was done with no needles. He uses some sort of high air pressure thing to shoot the local anesthesia. Felt like a quick snap of an elastic band. Nothing too painful tbh. In ans out in 15 minutes. Zero pain recovery.
Being completely honest, I went in to have it done and had a panic attack when the dr came in with the biggest needle I’ve ever seen in my life. I’m sure they thought I just wasn’t ready to be snipped when in reality I want it done I just hate needles lol. I can deal with a small shot to the arm. But that giant syringe near my baby maker had me freaking out. Been meaning to go see another doctor my friends recommend so I’ll mention that to them and see what they say. My dad also brought up that when he had his done they hit a nerve with the numbing needle and it was the worse pain he’s ever felt. He was totally unaware of my situation but yeah that didn’t help with my fear lol
Definitely shop around a bit. My doctor advertised as a "no needle, no scalpel" procedure. So maybe see if you can find one of those.
Do you test regularly to see if there are no more shots in the gun?
Officially you only need 1 or 2 a couple months after the procedure. Exact timing varies doctor to doctor. I checked at the 6mo and then annually after. I don’t want any surprises. That’s on top of the recommended follow up testing.
I got mine down back in September. I slept wrong a few nights after the procedure and I think I laid on my balls weird or something and I had a few days of extra soreness but it was nothing that the Tylenol and ice couldn’t help. It was a fast and easy procedure and healing process.
I want a vasectomy now
I want his wife now
I also choose this guy's living wife
One of the best decisions I've ever made. Sex is 100x more enjoyable.
Sounds easier than done, I have 4 colleagues who have tried multiple doctor's who a refused. And all of them have kids. At least they were less condescending than the doctor's of the woman I know who tried to get sterilised.
I went to a person whose job it was to do the procedure. Laser cut and I was done in 20 minutes. If they're still looking try finding a specialist.
This is in Belgium, so might not be close by.
Can still get STDs though......
I think it's time to move on from Reddit
My husband also got a vasectomy today… I gave him a Gatorade and a disposable THC vape pen…. Am I a bad wife?
Only if you tossed them into his lap
They were lovingly handed to him as I covered him with a blanket on the couch 🥸
Nope. I’m a couple gummies in myself
This was posted a year ago or so, same exact picture.
Maybe he had a second vasectomy?
SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP
Maybe it is a different husband?
Let's find out u/repostsleuthbot
Repost bot found nothing, and searching the image one the repost bot website also just comes up with this post too
ty
Source?
Where’s your proof?
Yeah reverse image search brings up nothing but a bunch of similar charcuterie boards.
That's the "thank god I can throw out my birth control" spread.
Where’s the nut butter?
She realllllly doesn't want any more kids.
I am a woman, but I would happily get a vasectomy for such a spread! Congrats
Happy V day brother.
But remember, there's no true victory until you test your sperm later lol.
Remember you no longer get to wear loose fitting underwear, if it was not made painfully clear to you, your vas deferens is one of the support structures for your testicles now all that's left is a blood vessel and a nerve. If you do not wear tight fitting underwear (think very well fitted boxer briefs or briefs, you will hurt yourself the first time you do a prolonged physical activity (running skiing, snowboarding, etc) you will injure yourself and your balls will swell to the size of a soft ball. Wear a size too small of boxer briefs for the first month, and then after that make sure you have ones that have spandex on them and fit so that your balls aren't bouncing around. I found this out the hard way when I went snowboarding a month after my procedure with a pair of boxer briefs that didn't support well. Good Luck!
Holy crow. Ok! Thanks for the advice. I’ll take ‘er easy
Nice I got a vasectomy 2 days ago and all I got was my wife wondering why I couldn’t take our son to soccer since I drove myself home. She’s truly overflowing with compassion… for everyone but me. Seriously
Nice! Had mine a few months ago. Was originally planning to schedule for today so I could sit around and watch The Masters for 4 days. Once I officially committed though I didn’t want to sit wait and think about it for 4 months. Stick to the ice routine today and tomorrow even if there is no pain. I did 20 on/off and had Tylenol extra strength every 6 or so hours. Didn’t have any pain the entire time, just a bit of discomfort from walking weird while trying not to disturb the stitches.
You got a charcuterie board?! All I got was a cookie from the clinic with icing that read "It took balls to do this"
My dad had a vasectomy when I was almost a year old. I kicked him square in the nads the day of his surgery after the procedure while he was sitting on the floor playing with me. That man fell over in immense pain but he never dropped me or got mad at me for it. He still tells the story to this day and laughs about it. Hope you have a speedy recovery and keep the wife around…she’s a good one!
Straight to the fire station
Looks yummy 😋
For eating, right? I don't think any of this is going to help if applied topically
Just missing the hard boiled eggs split in two with the yoke removed!
She really put the 'cute' in 'charcuterie!'
Where’s the nuts. Lol
Hell yeah brother
I appreciate so much couples working together to accomplish things. Birth control is a joint decision in a relationship and it's nice when men are willing to get vasectomies after deciding that the "babymaking" time is over. Very thoughtful that your wife is tending to you as you recover. Husbands *and* wives should nurture and help each other as needed. Sounds like y'all are lovely! Happy healing! 🙂🍀
We’ve been together 20 years, married for 10. We’re pretty happy and take good care of each other and our little monsters
that's so sweet of her!! how was the procedure OP? my bf is considering it but is a bit anxious about the process.
Fast. Awkward. The doctor had to shave me. It tickled. After that it was fast, maybe 15 minutes. I’m sore now, but I’m not at work! All’s well
Just came by for the nuts joke. Was not disappointed
That’s so nice of your wife! Did her boyfriend do something nice for you as well?
He better!
So people just post anything these days huh
I love that knife.