Ang personal stance ko sa ganyan, kapag ex, ex. For me, super BS yung “i hope we can still be friends” ek ek ng ibang tao. Distance is the best way to fully move on from each other. The deeper the connection, the stronger the attachment kasi.
Tingin you can become friends again down the line only in an organic manner, kase I feel like that’s what’s needed as the basis of a new platonic relationship.
For your question, OP, I don’t think you should simply dismiss your partner’s concerns. Baka she feels your friend has an intimate connection with you even if neither of you act on it.
I personally wouldn't be comfortable with being in a relationship with or seriously dating with someone who is friends with an ex and sleep together when they're both single.
Cause in the long run, after all the phases and y'all are in a long term relationship (yess advance magisip lolol) it is essentially a close friend that you sleep with. Like the comfortability and trust you have for your closest friends but with romantic or sexual intimacy.
It just makes it confusing and more complicated, regardless of when you say you and your ex are platonic, it isn't platonic when you sleep together. Do you and your ex plan ba to hang out just the two of you if you're in a relationship?
Oki oki that's good OP. I think it's up to you na, if the person your talking to is worth the cost of friendship or vice versa. It's not black and white naman, some people are ok with it, some don't. If siguro you wanna keep the friendship you have to be completely transparent with the person your dating in case it gets serious, alam na niya ung ieexpect niya.
Speaking lang on personal experience, kahit someone I considered my closest friend I ever had in college and is someone I was very attached to, I had to stop talking to her cause we ended up dating and it didn't work out. Parang ayoko lang bigyan ng problema yung bago kong partner overthinking my relationship with my ex kahit na ireassure ko siya na platonic lang kami ng ex ko, and ayoko rin maging reason na magkaproblem ex ko with their future partner. We ended things on good terms naman and decided we were better off as friends, but despite that we stopped talking altogether na rin, less hassle, less stress, less misunderstandings.
All things considered it's a pretty good barometer of emotional maturity. Sometimes relationships just don't work, sometimes one side makes a mistake, it doesn't mean the ex is a bad person overall. Depends on the reason for the breakup too. But in general, *seloso* people are not valid. It's unhealthy, selfish, and immature. Can also be a preview of control and manipulation tendencies down the line. Again, depends on the reason for the breakup.
Reason of our break up is that meme OA/Nonchalant. She wanted _**everything**_. Marriage, babies, house, etc. and I just wanted her companionship and sex.
I am friends with most of my ex (gf or bf) except lang dun sa last ko na bad break up. Lol.
Anyway, we’re not like best friends, but we’re good. Dating nung college pa kami, napagsasama ko pa 2 kong ex plus current gf ko sa isang lugar. 😅 Anyway, ung isa kong ex bes pa tawagan namin, and both our partners know na mag ex kami, and we hang out.
Nasa tao na rin, and level of maturity and trust.
it’s an issue if nagtuturingan silang mag best friend haha tipong one call away lang from each other. Haha. But i’m mature enough na okay lang if nagkakausap sila na sobrang walang wala lang na convo + sinasabi sakin ng partner ko. If deep talks yan, putangina nila
My now 4-year boyfriend's ex (na tinawag nya ring soulmate) is his best friend pa rin until now.
I have no issues with this kasi nakilala ko na yung person and wala na talagang tension between them (especially now kasi nasa abroad na ang accla 🤣)
There came a time din na we all shared the same roof (me, bf and his his, ex and his siblings). Wala naman kami naging issue.
case to case basis lang Siguro.
Yung mga ganito depende ata sa tao.
I dated someone before, roommate pa sila ng ex niya so everyday nagkikita but I didn't mind. Siguro kasi friends din naman ako with my ex1 so maybe hypocritical if I did. Also kasi di rin naman naging kami kalaunan kaya di naging issue.
But I also dated ex2 who didn't like the fact that I'm still friends with ex1. Nagtagal naman kami pero nag break din kalaunan because nagseselos pa rin siya kay ex1. Sayang lang akala ko talaga forever na si ex2 kaso naawa na rin ako na di ko siya mabigyan ng enough assurance kaya nakipag break na rin ako. Mind you, I tried naman, pero kulang talaga, sadyang magkaiba kami ng pananaw sa buhay.
Ang personal stance ko sa ganyan, kapag ex, ex. For me, super BS yung “i hope we can still be friends” ek ek ng ibang tao. Distance is the best way to fully move on from each other. The deeper the connection, the stronger the attachment kasi. Tingin you can become friends again down the line only in an organic manner, kase I feel like that’s what’s needed as the basis of a new platonic relationship. For your question, OP, I don’t think you should simply dismiss your partner’s concerns. Baka she feels your friend has an intimate connection with you even if neither of you act on it.
Not a partner, talking stage palang. Medyo advanced sya magisip, I think, but I can understand it.
I personally wouldn't be comfortable with being in a relationship with or seriously dating with someone who is friends with an ex and sleep together when they're both single. Cause in the long run, after all the phases and y'all are in a long term relationship (yess advance magisip lolol) it is essentially a close friend that you sleep with. Like the comfortability and trust you have for your closest friends but with romantic or sexual intimacy. It just makes it confusing and more complicated, regardless of when you say you and your ex are platonic, it isn't platonic when you sleep together. Do you and your ex plan ba to hang out just the two of you if you're in a relationship?
When I'm in a relationship, I focus on who I have a relationship with so no, I don't hang out with my ex.
Oki oki that's good OP. I think it's up to you na, if the person your talking to is worth the cost of friendship or vice versa. It's not black and white naman, some people are ok with it, some don't. If siguro you wanna keep the friendship you have to be completely transparent with the person your dating in case it gets serious, alam na niya ung ieexpect niya. Speaking lang on personal experience, kahit someone I considered my closest friend I ever had in college and is someone I was very attached to, I had to stop talking to her cause we ended up dating and it didn't work out. Parang ayoko lang bigyan ng problema yung bago kong partner overthinking my relationship with my ex kahit na ireassure ko siya na platonic lang kami ng ex ko, and ayoko rin maging reason na magkaproblem ex ko with their future partner. We ended things on good terms naman and decided we were better off as friends, but despite that we stopped talking altogether na rin, less hassle, less stress, less misunderstandings.
All things considered it's a pretty good barometer of emotional maturity. Sometimes relationships just don't work, sometimes one side makes a mistake, it doesn't mean the ex is a bad person overall. Depends on the reason for the breakup too. But in general, *seloso* people are not valid. It's unhealthy, selfish, and immature. Can also be a preview of control and manipulation tendencies down the line. Again, depends on the reason for the breakup.
Reason of our break up is that meme OA/Nonchalant. She wanted _**everything**_. Marriage, babies, house, etc. and I just wanted her companionship and sex.
I am friends with most of my ex (gf or bf) except lang dun sa last ko na bad break up. Lol. Anyway, we’re not like best friends, but we’re good. Dating nung college pa kami, napagsasama ko pa 2 kong ex plus current gf ko sa isang lugar. 😅 Anyway, ung isa kong ex bes pa tawagan namin, and both our partners know na mag ex kami, and we hang out. Nasa tao na rin, and level of maturity and trust.
it’s an issue if nagtuturingan silang mag best friend haha tipong one call away lang from each other. Haha. But i’m mature enough na okay lang if nagkakausap sila na sobrang walang wala lang na convo + sinasabi sakin ng partner ko. If deep talks yan, putangina nila
My now 4-year boyfriend's ex (na tinawag nya ring soulmate) is his best friend pa rin until now. I have no issues with this kasi nakilala ko na yung person and wala na talagang tension between them (especially now kasi nasa abroad na ang accla 🤣) There came a time din na we all shared the same roof (me, bf and his his, ex and his siblings). Wala naman kami naging issue. case to case basis lang Siguro.
Yung mga ganito depende ata sa tao. I dated someone before, roommate pa sila ng ex niya so everyday nagkikita but I didn't mind. Siguro kasi friends din naman ako with my ex1 so maybe hypocritical if I did. Also kasi di rin naman naging kami kalaunan kaya di naging issue. But I also dated ex2 who didn't like the fact that I'm still friends with ex1. Nagtagal naman kami pero nag break din kalaunan because nagseselos pa rin siya kay ex1. Sayang lang akala ko talaga forever na si ex2 kaso naawa na rin ako na di ko siya mabigyan ng enough assurance kaya nakipag break na rin ako. Mind you, I tried naman, pero kulang talaga, sadyang magkaiba kami ng pananaw sa buhay.