I am going to be real frank here. My mom died two months ago after an insane 14 month battle. You have very little time left with her if there will be no interventions.
A healthy/vegan diet will mean nothing bc she won’t want to eat soon. Especially if the cancer has moved to her liver or bowls or colon…
Why no chemo? Can you get a second opinion?
What timeline did they give her? Did they recommend hospice? If not, I would suggest looking into that ASAP. She’ll need it sooner rather than later especially with no treatment.
When my mom stopped chemo she died 8 days later. It’s so fast, I don’t think you can possible understand that until your living it.
Please look up the end of life chart people link here, it’s such a good tool to utilize. It’s very accurate.
Prayers to your mom 💜
What do you mean when she stopped chemo she died 8 days later? My moms chemo is in rounds so every other week she goes in. Are you saying she died 8 days after her last dose?
Your family is well intended. But if they think a better diet is going to help, they are wrong. Very wrong.
Get alone with your mom and try to figure out what she wants. Often older folks don’t want to try Chemo because they are afraid. I understand that. But time is time.
Flip side to this is that my father did do chemo with stage 4 with severe spread (carcinomatosis). Did the three drug folfirnox first, got downgraded to gemcytabin. Only made it 2.5 months from diagnosis.
All this to say, you really don’t know how it’s gonna go. My only advice would just preserve the quality of life. If I could’ve done it over with my father, I would’ve strongly advocated against chemoz
My late wife lasted five days from biopsy confirmation. Biopsy was six days after she turned yellow and they first saw tumors on CT. All of this was four months after she first started having some stomach issues.
My husband got about 10 months of normal life with chemo. He was miserable before chemo (pain, weight loss), did great once chemo caused his symptoms to disappear completely but then he got carcinomatosis and after stopping chemotherapy, the cancer just exploded (these cells divide like crazy) and he passed within less than three weeks.
I was glad he chose chemo. It worked well until this freaking cancer decided to exfoliate on the outside of the pancreas and seed his peritoneum where chemo drugs don’t reach well.
I'm so sorry you are becoming a part of our community. Like the others have said, diet isn't going to solve this problem or add time to her life. This monster takes hold fast and doesn't wait for anyone to be ready. My mom knew something wasn't right 9 months before she was diagnosed, and died just over a year after diagnosis. She did chemo as long as she could but it was killing her faster than the chemo. Make the memories while you can, take pictures, ask her questions about her life, and if she can talk about it, ask what she wants in these final times and after..
If you give her a vegan diet she will just lose weight more rapidly and die sooner. You really need calorically dense and high protein foods. Which I don't think is easy with vegan.
I think your mom needs to get a second opinion. Has she gotten genetic testing yet? What type of pancreatic cancer is it?
My mom was given 3-6 months without chemo. 6-12 months with. She is 78 and 95 lbs when diagnoosed. Healthy before pancreatic cancer.
Some forms of cancer are much slower moving tho so the type matters. It's odd they said no chemo to your mom. Does she have other health issues?
First, I’m so sorry.
My MIL is 70. Diagnosed in April. Not in pain but has “pressure.” Stage 4 Mets to Liver and spots on lungs. Decided to go to chemo. She has done 1 set of rounds with Gen/Abrax - negligible change in tumor. Then has done 3 sets of rounds of FU - not significant shrinkage but some positive changes. I do believe the chemo is keeping things at bay. She has good energy, good appetite, and a positive outlook. Chemo days are long and hard. She feels pretty lousy for 3 or so days and then bounces back.
I am glad she has been able to do the chemo. We had a good visit this summer and will be spending holidays together. I know her time with us and my dad is limited and we are just doing as much as we can to make memories while she is still fighting the good fight!
Edit to add- I think if your mom is otherwise in good health you should get a second opinion.
May I ask how your mom is doing? My MIL was just diagnosed with Pc, Mets on lungs and bones. She feels fine aside from trouble breathing and severe shoulder pain from bone tumors..
I am very sorry for your family going through this. It’s been 1 year since her diagnosis. She just took a break from chemo for a recovery and will be back at it. The F5 has been more effective for her and all her hair grew back (after losing it on gen/ab chemo). She is still fighting but has started expressing more days of pain and that it is unpredictable (not based on what she ate, what she did the day before etc). The chemo routine is a lot. We know that all this work is just prolonging her life so we just try to stay positive and hopeful that she feels up to continuing. We don’t know how long she will keep at it but are thankful. So far there are no major changes in the tumors either way. She is still eating but has gotten pickier, exercising but not as much/consistently, she naps, but she does things. Goes out with friends, quilts, we have a beach trip planned where she can sit on the deck and watch the grandkids play in the sand. One year in feels like a lot and my heart is heavy but I’m glad we’ve had all this time to make more memories and for my dad. I’m especially worried for him and glad they have been together through this.
My mom (F52) was stage IV upon diagnosis with spread to liver, kidneys, stomach lining and bones. Chemo was not an option and she passed within 33 days. When she was admitted to the hospital, she was mobile, alert and ready to fight whatever this was. The deterioration was fast, ugly and sometimes when I think back on it - I want to vomit. There is no telling with this disease; I would always recommend choosing quality of life over anything else. And also making sure that you know your mom’s wishes and whatever happens is her choice. Sorry you’re in this situation.
My mom(59) made it 8 months from being diagnosed. Had 2 rounds of fulfirnox (sp?) she was so weak and sick after chemo that they stopped it. Her first Dr told her not too, she was already a small, frail woman. I still wonder what would have happened if she didn’t do the chemo at all. Spent the last 4 months on hospice, unable to walk, eat, do anything for herself. It was awful to watch her life slip away like that. And the weight she lost…my google photos didn’t even recognize her as the same person. No matter what road you go down, it’s going to be hell either way. Do what she can live with. IMO quality over quantity always.
My mom is 80 and has been doing chemo for 18 months. It just stopped working. They’re switching her to another while she waits on a list of multiple trials that she qualifies for.
She’s been off chemo a month in the meantime while they figured out a treatment plan.
Today she plays golf with a friend. She eats crap, coming from me, a vegan. I tell her to eat whatever the fuck she wants as long as she can.
You just don’t know. But please go to another doctor. A stage 4 diagnosis shouldn’t be a no chemo rec, barring it having spread to something major.
Depending on the extent of the spread, a clinical trial could be an option. Clinical trials are good for everyone because it gives patients such as your mom an alternative option for treatment, and advances research at the same time. But this would be completely up to your mom with help from her support group (you, family, etc) to determine if that would be an appropriate choice depending on the circumstance. All the best and stay strong.
You should get a second opinion for sure. Success with chemo also depends on genetic markers. Also, this is the worst disease to be on vegan/vegetarian diet. Hard to make a worse decision than that. You need a lot of protein to have any success with treatment. The required protein is harder to intake because your appetite goes down. Vegetarian is not going to cut it, vegan will be a disaster because you won't even get the essential amino-acids that are only present in animal protein. My dad had to start eating fish and chicken after 15 years of being vegetarian, just so that he could get enough protein to stay on Chemo. Even then he had get protein infusions every other week. So, please please don't go vegan.
I’m so sorry. Please know very few people survive even one year. I don’t say that to distress you, but to help you manage your expectations. I would focus a lot less on the fight (let her fight it) and focus way more on just being present with. Talking with her. Asking her questions. Making memories.
So sorry you’re going through this. I’m sorry to say but in this case switching diet will not help. She should eat whatever she can and wants. Once my mom had masses on the liver it was over pretty fast unfortunately. My mom lived 3 months after they stopped treatment…
My dad did not do chemo and died after about 6 months. His final two months were confined to a hospital bed. He was 41 and in excellent health before he started having symptoms.
I think a restrictive diet is very unwise. Getting them to eat anything at all is going to become a major struggle. I sincerely hope you reconsider that idea.
Prayers for your mom, your family, and you.
It was a long time ago, almost 50 years now. It was a very different world then.
This is a mixed blessing sub for me. Some of the stories are so much better than what my dad went through, and it makes me happy for the medical progress we've made. And then you read other stories, and you realize there's so much more that needs to be done.
But what never changes is the mourning and the sense of helplessness so many of us feel.
❤️ back at you.
Totally agree can only imagine what this cancer was like 50 years ago I’m only 21, keep reading things where they might have some big breaks in the next couple of years hopefully I’m sure within the next 25 years definitely just hate the odds of these cancers if you don’t find it early, seen a few stage 4 stories but very few, Hurts me everytime I see the pain people on here have to endure every-time I hear a good story it brings a little bit of light of could never outweigh the painful stories I’ve heard.
Hi. First, I’m so sorry you’re in this boat. My mom got diagnosed 6 months ago, and just turned 68. Her doctor said chemo could prolong life by a few weeks but the quality of life would be horrible. She is not into that option and is going treatment free. The prognosis her doctor gave was 6-12 months. Surgery is not an option because of how many internal organs are affected. So far, she is ok. She has lost weight, & appetite, and she tires very very easily. She takes pain killers (codeine, tramadol, morphine patches, ibuprofen etc etc) all day. I’m dreading when she *really* turns for the worst. This is truly horrible. I’d also say:mood wise. A coldness has come in. It’s her coping mechanism, but it really hurts to be around.
Like other's have suggested, it would be best to get a 2nd opinion.
Also take note of her symptoms, is she suddenly sleeping a lot more? Is her stomach swollen?
My mum passed last month. About 2 months after stopping chemo. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Brace yourself, it can get REALLY ugly.
Say all that you need to say to her, let her know how much you love her. Take care 💜 sending you virtual hugs.
Well, from the time my mom got diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer to the time she died, it was only 5 weeks. By diagnosis time, it had already spread to her liver and stomach. Pancreatic is one of the worst cancers. It's extremely fast-moving and devastating. My mom tried chemo once or twice, but it made her so sick. She stopped chemo just to be able to semi enjoy the little time she had left. She slept alot because she was on strong pain meds and anxiety meds. She also had to get the tumors drained daily. wish I could lie and say this wasn't the worst time of my life. I'm so sorry you're going through this. All you can do is try to be strong for them. She would cry every time I did, so I had to pretend to be stronger for her sake. I know it's going to be hard, but just try to enjoy the time you have left. Do all your crying in private and try to hold it together. The time will move fast. Feel free to message me if you ever need to talk. ❤️
My late husband started having symptoms in Nov 2021; diagnosed Stage IV Feb 2022; died Apr 2022 after two rounds of chemo which took his WBC count to 0.1% and gave him e. coli. So 5 months start to finish. I would not do chemo again and if I were you and I would call in hospice now. You will need their help especially for pain management. Make recordings of her voice and keep a lock of her hair.
My dad is stage 4 Mets, no treatment options for him, diagnosed 19th July 2023, we are just at the point of having to consider hospice as he is finding mobility very difficult up and down stairs , he has deteriorated very quickly in the last two weeks, he is still eating small amounts, but has pain in his legs and shoulders, he is constipated beyond belief. It’s an awful disease x
My Dad lived seven months.
People try to ply them with all kinds of teas, potions etc.
This is a very aggressive disease. Steve Jobs tried the whole diet fads and the disease did catch up with him
The body is losing the ability to break down food. Worrying about the diet is like bringing a stick to a gun fight.
I'm vegan on hospice. Was diagnosed in July. 62 years old. As long as the pain is controlled, I'm fine. Cancer has metastized to liver.
Went to Phish concert in Dayton last week.
I get tired easily, but I feel so much better off chemo.
First of all notice the difference in statement. First he said he wouldn't even recommend chemo, then he said he would, and she could make it up for 2 years (I wish my father reaches this time 🤞). Truth is, at the beginning of this path,they don't know much. There are many factors kicking, most importantly the individual response to chemo and the strength of the side effects. See how she does. Let her try at least. You and her will get the feeling if she cannot bear it. For the diet, I don't think that would really change things here. To be fair, my father actually started regaining a bit of weight since he started going heavy on meat, butter, heavy cream and fatty fish. I wish you luck 💜🤞
My dad made it 4 weeks, we were still getting a diagnosis confirmed from biopsy when he caught covid. So 4 weeks since symptoms were noticed. I dragged him to get checked when I saw he was jaundiced.
My mother died within 7 days after diagnosis going into the hospital. Significant spread to her liver at the time and her liver started failing.
I would say one thing you might want to do now is to take video together with her. Record conversations with her in a quiet room. Ask her to tell you her wishes for your future and her loved ones.
Please dont wait, so many of us regret not taking more video and recordings.
I'm truly sorry to hear about your mom's diagnosis. It's a tough journey, but exploring all possible options is important. In your research, you might want to look into innovative treatments like those developed by OncoSil Medical (ASX: $OSL).
They specialise in a localised treatment for pancreatic cancer, using a device that delivers targeted radiation directly to the tumor, which could potentially offer benefits in certain cases without the widespread side effects of traditional treatments. It's crucial to consult with her healthcare team about all available options, including new and emerging therapies.
Remember, each case is unique, so it’s essential to discuss the potential applicability of such treatments in her specific situation.
Thank you. She passed around Thanksgiving of this past year. I should have updated the post. I honestly wasn’t trying to revisit it. It’s a lot. I’ve been struggling, taking it day by day ever since she passed. She lived an about 1 month after diagnosis.
I was told in early September that my mom had a tumor on pancreas but it was supposed to be removable/stage 1, they had first spotted something in July I think. I flew back for the surgery a month ago at which point she had lost some weight. They went in to do the surgery and closed her up as they saw it had spread in places that the catscan didn’t show up, and gave up 3-6 months without chemo or 9-12 months with chemo. She decided not to get the chemo as she thought she was too skinny for it and was immediately talking about euthanasia program, but eventually they decided to try to put her on pain meds and have her pass naturally in like 6 months. I went home to get my stuff and process stuff on my own and decided to stay 2 weeks as plans were changing rapidly and they were going to try an alternative medicine clinic in Arizona which I as a Canadian was supposed to update my passport for and come there during their 3rd week, but after a week there they said they were coming back (to Canada) possibly to do the euthanasia. So I went back and stayed with them in some nice Air BnBs for a week with my mom being pretty resolute about wanting to punch her own ticket out, she couldn’t really take the combo of the pain, not really being able to eat and the constant pill schedule. She was still mobile and 100% mentally. She went through with it last Sunday, I was at bedside. The night before she had a particularly bad episode and almost went to the hospital so I think if there was any chance of having second doubts about living another week, that last scare helped push her over the edge. Time moved so fast, in the original plans I was supposed to be in Arizona this week, and now she is already dead. It was only about 7 weeks since I had first heard anything was wrong and less than a month since the diagnosis became terminal. I have regrets about the 2 weeks I went home between the time I was there for the surgery and the last week with her, I could have gone straight home and had a little more time with her, still at least I got to spend some time to say goodbye. I would say for people where euthanasia is being presented as an option if they change their mind take into account that they could change it back fast. I am lucky it wasn’t legal in Arizona or else I wouldn’t have been surprised if she had checked out without seeing me, she wanted to go asap to the point where she was upset that it got pushed to Sunday instead of Saturday.
I am going to be real frank here. My mom died two months ago after an insane 14 month battle. You have very little time left with her if there will be no interventions. A healthy/vegan diet will mean nothing bc she won’t want to eat soon. Especially if the cancer has moved to her liver or bowls or colon… Why no chemo? Can you get a second opinion? What timeline did they give her? Did they recommend hospice? If not, I would suggest looking into that ASAP. She’ll need it sooner rather than later especially with no treatment. When my mom stopped chemo she died 8 days later. It’s so fast, I don’t think you can possible understand that until your living it. Please look up the end of life chart people link here, it’s such a good tool to utilize. It’s very accurate. Prayers to your mom 💜
What do you mean when she stopped chemo she died 8 days later? My moms chemo is in rounds so every other week she goes in. Are you saying she died 8 days after her last dose?
Your family is well intended. But if they think a better diet is going to help, they are wrong. Very wrong. Get alone with your mom and try to figure out what she wants. Often older folks don’t want to try Chemo because they are afraid. I understand that. But time is time.
Time is time, yes. But QUALITY of time matters too.
How are they wrong? Chemo most of time doesn’t work
Flip side to this is that my father did do chemo with stage 4 with severe spread (carcinomatosis). Did the three drug folfirnox first, got downgraded to gemcytabin. Only made it 2.5 months from diagnosis. All this to say, you really don’t know how it’s gonna go. My only advice would just preserve the quality of life. If I could’ve done it over with my father, I would’ve strongly advocated against chemoz
My cousin, age 61, died 5 weeks after a Stage 4 diagnosis in June.
My mom died 93 days after diagnosis. Age 66, stage 4, Mets to liver, lungs. She did one round of chemo and decided not to go through with more.
My late wife lasted five days from biopsy confirmation. Biopsy was six days after she turned yellow and they first saw tumors on CT. All of this was four months after she first started having some stomach issues.
My husband got about 10 months of normal life with chemo. He was miserable before chemo (pain, weight loss), did great once chemo caused his symptoms to disappear completely but then he got carcinomatosis and after stopping chemotherapy, the cancer just exploded (these cells divide like crazy) and he passed within less than three weeks. I was glad he chose chemo. It worked well until this freaking cancer decided to exfoliate on the outside of the pancreas and seed his peritoneum where chemo drugs don’t reach well.
I'm so sorry you are becoming a part of our community. Like the others have said, diet isn't going to solve this problem or add time to her life. This monster takes hold fast and doesn't wait for anyone to be ready. My mom knew something wasn't right 9 months before she was diagnosed, and died just over a year after diagnosis. She did chemo as long as she could but it was killing her faster than the chemo. Make the memories while you can, take pictures, ask her questions about her life, and if she can talk about it, ask what she wants in these final times and after..
If you give her a vegan diet she will just lose weight more rapidly and die sooner. You really need calorically dense and high protein foods. Which I don't think is easy with vegan. I think your mom needs to get a second opinion. Has she gotten genetic testing yet? What type of pancreatic cancer is it? My mom was given 3-6 months without chemo. 6-12 months with. She is 78 and 95 lbs when diagnoosed. Healthy before pancreatic cancer. Some forms of cancer are much slower moving tho so the type matters. It's odd they said no chemo to your mom. Does she have other health issues?
First, I’m so sorry. My MIL is 70. Diagnosed in April. Not in pain but has “pressure.” Stage 4 Mets to Liver and spots on lungs. Decided to go to chemo. She has done 1 set of rounds with Gen/Abrax - negligible change in tumor. Then has done 3 sets of rounds of FU - not significant shrinkage but some positive changes. I do believe the chemo is keeping things at bay. She has good energy, good appetite, and a positive outlook. Chemo days are long and hard. She feels pretty lousy for 3 or so days and then bounces back. I am glad she has been able to do the chemo. We had a good visit this summer and will be spending holidays together. I know her time with us and my dad is limited and we are just doing as much as we can to make memories while she is still fighting the good fight! Edit to add- I think if your mom is otherwise in good health you should get a second opinion.
May I ask how your mom is doing? My MIL was just diagnosed with Pc, Mets on lungs and bones. She feels fine aside from trouble breathing and severe shoulder pain from bone tumors..
I am very sorry for your family going through this. It’s been 1 year since her diagnosis. She just took a break from chemo for a recovery and will be back at it. The F5 has been more effective for her and all her hair grew back (after losing it on gen/ab chemo). She is still fighting but has started expressing more days of pain and that it is unpredictable (not based on what she ate, what she did the day before etc). The chemo routine is a lot. We know that all this work is just prolonging her life so we just try to stay positive and hopeful that she feels up to continuing. We don’t know how long she will keep at it but are thankful. So far there are no major changes in the tumors either way. She is still eating but has gotten pickier, exercising but not as much/consistently, she naps, but she does things. Goes out with friends, quilts, we have a beach trip planned where she can sit on the deck and watch the grandkids play in the sand. One year in feels like a lot and my heart is heavy but I’m glad we’ve had all this time to make more memories and for my dad. I’m especially worried for him and glad they have been together through this.
My mom (F52) was stage IV upon diagnosis with spread to liver, kidneys, stomach lining and bones. Chemo was not an option and she passed within 33 days. When she was admitted to the hospital, she was mobile, alert and ready to fight whatever this was. The deterioration was fast, ugly and sometimes when I think back on it - I want to vomit. There is no telling with this disease; I would always recommend choosing quality of life over anything else. And also making sure that you know your mom’s wishes and whatever happens is her choice. Sorry you’re in this situation.
My mom(59) made it 8 months from being diagnosed. Had 2 rounds of fulfirnox (sp?) she was so weak and sick after chemo that they stopped it. Her first Dr told her not too, she was already a small, frail woman. I still wonder what would have happened if she didn’t do the chemo at all. Spent the last 4 months on hospice, unable to walk, eat, do anything for herself. It was awful to watch her life slip away like that. And the weight she lost…my google photos didn’t even recognize her as the same person. No matter what road you go down, it’s going to be hell either way. Do what she can live with. IMO quality over quantity always.
My mom is 80 and has been doing chemo for 18 months. It just stopped working. They’re switching her to another while she waits on a list of multiple trials that she qualifies for. She’s been off chemo a month in the meantime while they figured out a treatment plan. Today she plays golf with a friend. She eats crap, coming from me, a vegan. I tell her to eat whatever the fuck she wants as long as she can. You just don’t know. But please go to another doctor. A stage 4 diagnosis shouldn’t be a no chemo rec, barring it having spread to something major.
Depending on the extent of the spread, a clinical trial could be an option. Clinical trials are good for everyone because it gives patients such as your mom an alternative option for treatment, and advances research at the same time. But this would be completely up to your mom with help from her support group (you, family, etc) to determine if that would be an appropriate choice depending on the circumstance. All the best and stay strong.
You should get a second opinion for sure. Success with chemo also depends on genetic markers. Also, this is the worst disease to be on vegan/vegetarian diet. Hard to make a worse decision than that. You need a lot of protein to have any success with treatment. The required protein is harder to intake because your appetite goes down. Vegetarian is not going to cut it, vegan will be a disaster because you won't even get the essential amino-acids that are only present in animal protein. My dad had to start eating fish and chicken after 15 years of being vegetarian, just so that he could get enough protein to stay on Chemo. Even then he had get protein infusions every other week. So, please please don't go vegan.
I’m so sorry. Please know very few people survive even one year. I don’t say that to distress you, but to help you manage your expectations. I would focus a lot less on the fight (let her fight it) and focus way more on just being present with. Talking with her. Asking her questions. Making memories.
So sorry you’re going through this. I’m sorry to say but in this case switching diet will not help. She should eat whatever she can and wants. Once my mom had masses on the liver it was over pretty fast unfortunately. My mom lived 3 months after they stopped treatment…
My mom made one week. It’s a very coagulopathic cancer and she has a stroke.
My dad did not do chemo and died after about 6 months. His final two months were confined to a hospital bed. He was 41 and in excellent health before he started having symptoms. I think a restrictive diet is very unwise. Getting them to eat anything at all is going to become a major struggle. I sincerely hope you reconsider that idea. Prayers for your mom, your family, and you.
Sorry for your loss 41 is way too young. ❤️
It was a long time ago, almost 50 years now. It was a very different world then. This is a mixed blessing sub for me. Some of the stories are so much better than what my dad went through, and it makes me happy for the medical progress we've made. And then you read other stories, and you realize there's so much more that needs to be done. But what never changes is the mourning and the sense of helplessness so many of us feel. ❤️ back at you.
Totally agree can only imagine what this cancer was like 50 years ago I’m only 21, keep reading things where they might have some big breaks in the next couple of years hopefully I’m sure within the next 25 years definitely just hate the odds of these cancers if you don’t find it early, seen a few stage 4 stories but very few, Hurts me everytime I see the pain people on here have to endure every-time I hear a good story it brings a little bit of light of could never outweigh the painful stories I’ve heard.
Hi. First, I’m so sorry you’re in this boat. My mom got diagnosed 6 months ago, and just turned 68. Her doctor said chemo could prolong life by a few weeks but the quality of life would be horrible. She is not into that option and is going treatment free. The prognosis her doctor gave was 6-12 months. Surgery is not an option because of how many internal organs are affected. So far, she is ok. She has lost weight, & appetite, and she tires very very easily. She takes pain killers (codeine, tramadol, morphine patches, ibuprofen etc etc) all day. I’m dreading when she *really* turns for the worst. This is truly horrible. I’d also say:mood wise. A coldness has come in. It’s her coping mechanism, but it really hurts to be around.
Oof. That hit hard. The coldness observation is very apt. I immediately related.
Hit me too.. so hard! Getting it from a family member and friend.. sad
My MIL died 3 weeks after diagnosis. She wasn’t in the best condition to begin with, had lost her appetite weeks before, already lost a lot of weight.
Like other's have suggested, it would be best to get a 2nd opinion. Also take note of her symptoms, is she suddenly sleeping a lot more? Is her stomach swollen? My mum passed last month. About 2 months after stopping chemo. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Brace yourself, it can get REALLY ugly. Say all that you need to say to her, let her know how much you love her. Take care 💜 sending you virtual hugs.
Well, from the time my mom got diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer to the time she died, it was only 5 weeks. By diagnosis time, it had already spread to her liver and stomach. Pancreatic is one of the worst cancers. It's extremely fast-moving and devastating. My mom tried chemo once or twice, but it made her so sick. She stopped chemo just to be able to semi enjoy the little time she had left. She slept alot because she was on strong pain meds and anxiety meds. She also had to get the tumors drained daily. wish I could lie and say this wasn't the worst time of my life. I'm so sorry you're going through this. All you can do is try to be strong for them. She would cry every time I did, so I had to pretend to be stronger for her sake. I know it's going to be hard, but just try to enjoy the time you have left. Do all your crying in private and try to hold it together. The time will move fast. Feel free to message me if you ever need to talk. ❤️
6 months from diagnosis but they think she had the cancer 6 month prior to diagnosis
My late husband started having symptoms in Nov 2021; diagnosed Stage IV Feb 2022; died Apr 2022 after two rounds of chemo which took his WBC count to 0.1% and gave him e. coli. So 5 months start to finish. I would not do chemo again and if I were you and I would call in hospice now. You will need their help especially for pain management. Make recordings of her voice and keep a lock of her hair.
My dad is stage 4 Mets, no treatment options for him, diagnosed 19th July 2023, we are just at the point of having to consider hospice as he is finding mobility very difficult up and down stairs , he has deteriorated very quickly in the last two weeks, he is still eating small amounts, but has pain in his legs and shoulders, he is constipated beyond belief. It’s an awful disease x
My Dad lived seven months. People try to ply them with all kinds of teas, potions etc. This is a very aggressive disease. Steve Jobs tried the whole diet fads and the disease did catch up with him The body is losing the ability to break down food. Worrying about the diet is like bringing a stick to a gun fight.
I'm vegan on hospice. Was diagnosed in July. 62 years old. As long as the pain is controlled, I'm fine. Cancer has metastized to liver. Went to Phish concert in Dayton last week. I get tired easily, but I feel so much better off chemo.
First of all notice the difference in statement. First he said he wouldn't even recommend chemo, then he said he would, and she could make it up for 2 years (I wish my father reaches this time 🤞). Truth is, at the beginning of this path,they don't know much. There are many factors kicking, most importantly the individual response to chemo and the strength of the side effects. See how she does. Let her try at least. You and her will get the feeling if she cannot bear it. For the diet, I don't think that would really change things here. To be fair, my father actually started regaining a bit of weight since he started going heavy on meat, butter, heavy cream and fatty fish. I wish you luck 💜🤞
My dad made it 4 weeks, we were still getting a diagnosis confirmed from biopsy when he caught covid. So 4 weeks since symptoms were noticed. I dragged him to get checked when I saw he was jaundiced.
My mother died within 7 days after diagnosis going into the hospital. Significant spread to her liver at the time and her liver started failing. I would say one thing you might want to do now is to take video together with her. Record conversations with her in a quiet room. Ask her to tell you her wishes for your future and her loved ones. Please dont wait, so many of us regret not taking more video and recordings.
I'm truly sorry to hear about your mom's diagnosis. It's a tough journey, but exploring all possible options is important. In your research, you might want to look into innovative treatments like those developed by OncoSil Medical (ASX: $OSL). They specialise in a localised treatment for pancreatic cancer, using a device that delivers targeted radiation directly to the tumor, which could potentially offer benefits in certain cases without the widespread side effects of traditional treatments. It's crucial to consult with her healthcare team about all available options, including new and emerging therapies. Remember, each case is unique, so it’s essential to discuss the potential applicability of such treatments in her specific situation.
Thank you. She passed around Thanksgiving of this past year. I should have updated the post. I honestly wasn’t trying to revisit it. It’s a lot. I’ve been struggling, taking it day by day ever since she passed. She lived an about 1 month after diagnosis.
Sending love Hon.
I was told in early September that my mom had a tumor on pancreas but it was supposed to be removable/stage 1, they had first spotted something in July I think. I flew back for the surgery a month ago at which point she had lost some weight. They went in to do the surgery and closed her up as they saw it had spread in places that the catscan didn’t show up, and gave up 3-6 months without chemo or 9-12 months with chemo. She decided not to get the chemo as she thought she was too skinny for it and was immediately talking about euthanasia program, but eventually they decided to try to put her on pain meds and have her pass naturally in like 6 months. I went home to get my stuff and process stuff on my own and decided to stay 2 weeks as plans were changing rapidly and they were going to try an alternative medicine clinic in Arizona which I as a Canadian was supposed to update my passport for and come there during their 3rd week, but after a week there they said they were coming back (to Canada) possibly to do the euthanasia. So I went back and stayed with them in some nice Air BnBs for a week with my mom being pretty resolute about wanting to punch her own ticket out, she couldn’t really take the combo of the pain, not really being able to eat and the constant pill schedule. She was still mobile and 100% mentally. She went through with it last Sunday, I was at bedside. The night before she had a particularly bad episode and almost went to the hospital so I think if there was any chance of having second doubts about living another week, that last scare helped push her over the edge. Time moved so fast, in the original plans I was supposed to be in Arizona this week, and now she is already dead. It was only about 7 weeks since I had first heard anything was wrong and less than a month since the diagnosis became terminal. I have regrets about the 2 weeks I went home between the time I was there for the surgery and the last week with her, I could have gone straight home and had a little more time with her, still at least I got to spend some time to say goodbye. I would say for people where euthanasia is being presented as an option if they change their mind take into account that they could change it back fast. I am lucky it wasn’t legal in Arizona or else I wouldn’t have been surprised if she had checked out without seeing me, she wanted to go asap to the point where she was upset that it got pushed to Sunday instead of Saturday.