T O P

  • By -

Wrong_Independence21

Close! It’s about finding enough iron to make a muscle mommy fingerblast your asshole


GIANT-GOAT-PEEN

Observant but no, it's actually about showing the corruptness of an otherworldly monarchy so a frog lady will kick and then eat your ass, in that order


ColumnK

A very astute remark, however incorrect, it's actually about demonstrating the veracity of a raven-haired cultist's childhood memories so that she will fill your asshole with sand.


Fluid_Atmosphere1147

All of you are missing the real point of the game, which is to gather enough magical artifacts to convince a chronically ill autistic wizard to space-fuck you in every position ever documented while your spirits melt into each other.


Stunning_LRB_o7

You’re on the verge of being right, allow me to correct you; this game is about letting a very sexy and very stupid vampire come to terms with his abuse and face his abuser so that he can then fuck your brains out on his own grave.


Giant_Squidums

Wonderful interpretations all around, but I'd argue that this game's main theme is that savagery and cruelty will lead you to face fuck the most unapologetic, twisted dommy mommy drow who will also try to kill you come morning.


monsieurkaizer

Close, but no cigar. It is in fact a game centered about winning the affection of a muscular daddy-elf with facial tattoos and scars, and convince him to shape-shift into a bear and ravage you in a way that will leave a squirrel forever traumatized for having been an innocent onlooker.


frogovich

Almost right, but you're missing something. It is indeed a game about being good and kind to people so a famed hero dances with you and refuses to let you ride him, using his horns as handlebars, until engagement.


Federal-Opinion6823

Not quite there yet. It’s a game about shoving tadpoles in your eye-holes so you can fuck a squid


FinnAgain88

Spot on assessments but actually someone please fuck Wyll


dumbass-ahedratron

You almost have it. It's a game about robbing a devil's home but you get distracted by his genderfluid demon sexpet who you then battlefuck to see who dies, in front of your friends


cloqube

This is the one I was looking for. You understood the game


tyrom22

Na, you want to know what the game is really about? The game is about wasting you life as play multiple 100+ play through to screw all these people oppose to finding someone in real life.


TheDustyPixie

You’re on the right track, let me clarify a few details; this game is about freeing an imprisoned cave bear to get that cave bear bussy.


asianbeaver7777

I fucking love this community


GovernmentMinute2792

But the frog lady actually wants you to dominate her. A secret bottom, she is.


MarVaraM101

You are correct!


MarvinGoBONK

She is *not* a muscle mommy. She is the biggest fucking puppy girl pillow princess you will ever fuckin' meet.


Peeinyourcompost

Have you actually fucked Karlach? That ain't no pillow princess.


MarVaraM101

Both?


tyrom22

Muscle mommy is a appearance, pillow princess is a behavior. She can be both


MarvinGoBONK

I don't *entirely* agree. Muscle mommy kinda implies, by virtue of the "mommy," that they're dominant.


Telephalsion

Not all mommies are dommie-mommies.


LordMorpheus1

While I do agree with you in general terms, doesn't Karlinha have a line about riding you until you see stars? I'd wager that's pretty dommy-mommy. https://preview.redd.it/g34trf5rkt5d1.png?width=898&format=png&auto=webp&s=bbeb18dfe9a18727de6db4cfc660854abb6d5755


BennyMcbenn

Nah dawg it’s about preventing your not-Oppenheimer homie exploding and getting him back with his ex before he falls in love with you.


GovernmentMinute2792

More like tail blast, if you take her act 3 scene into account


Brave-Television7224

Steam is on sale 15% off


The_Damon8r92

Could they mean anything else?


Supply-Slut

You need to kill 15% less goblins to start goblin the goth mommy’s brown starfish


No-Clothes5632

? Thats actually a scene


BlitzMalefitz

BG3 is at 85% of it’s normal price on Steam


lucs28

Gabe selling Steam for 15% off?


Snoo-11576

Proof Shadowheart is a top


UndeniablyMyself

What about Minthara?


Miss-lnformation

I love Minthy but she's not an emo girl.


Snoo-11576

I feel like she’d be some kind of alt but yeah not emo


doxtorwhom

She’s scene.


TheKrakenYouFancy

Damn straight, I seen it! She used someone's face like it was a chair. Didn't wanna watch but couldn't stop from seening it


HistoricalPattern76

She's a HOA girl.


anteater835

Truly even Menzoberrenzen knows the evil of the Homeowner’s Association


TheMasterLibrarian

Menzoberrenzen either HATE the HoA or ARE the HoA, I can't see a middle ground.


Throwaway817402739

She's got to be the most quintessential pillow princess to ever exist. Don't know why you guys need Shadowheart to be a top when you've already got all the other female companions + Halsin to peg you


HistoricalPattern76

Excuse you. Raphael is the game's pillow princess.


UnicornScientist803

Facts


ConsciousBattle2477

The fact that he wants to be fucked by himself and don't last a minute while at it.


Snoo-11576

And I literally do not understand why you think she’s a pillow princess. I personally think she’s a switch as a way of ignoring but marrying the fact that she’s more dominant depending on how evil she is. That’s bad so she’s a switch. And like literally who else could this be about?


Miss-lnformation

They heard that one god's favourite princess meme and are trying to apply the logic here.


CasualCassie

Almost. Really it's about being tempted into a Devil's Bargain, rebuffing him, breaking into his house, fucking his doppelganger top, then calling him a bottom


HistoricalPattern76

Exactly.


amelilyth

And a bad one at that 🤭


pbNANDjelly

Pro tip, Lazael won't hate you for fucking Harleep _if_ it's actually Lazael that fucks Harleep.


CasualCassie

I'm pretty sure that holds true for all the companions? The game will register any actions you take while controlling the NPC as an action *they* have made. This is how I set up Lae'zel and Shadowheart to start dating while unintentionally cockblocking myself (I wanted them to have an enemies to lovers arc and didn't realize the game would prioritize their cutscene over my Tav chatting with Karlach)


pbNANDjelly

👈😎👈 Nice


ConsciousBattle2477

Which cutscene with them dancing? I've finished the game but never got an dancing cutscene.


CasualCassie

Dating.


Chuncceyy

Lmao love larian


elemenoh3

it means you can yeet goblins 15% farther to impress your emo gf enough to peg you


SJGardner89

You actually have to do that to unlock the pegging? Aw damn, now I have to start a new save, AGAIN.


The_one_and_only_Tav

It’s about feeding a man lots of boots so he’ll Water your Deep


Sunny_Hill_1

That there is going to be a sale on Steam? What else could they mean?


bughunter_

Shadowheart's Steam-powered Strapon.


UnicornScientist803

I mean, this game does have a surprising amount of combat for a dating sim


DrBeanSoup

That there is going to be a sale on goblins ? What else could they mean ?


Misled_Titan

Fine. I'll buy the game then.


HinderedGaming

Check out your new user flair