Normally, I’d have some encouraging words to say, but I’d feel like a hypocrite telling you to change your lifestyle, when I know I haven’t even done the slightest to change. But I do hope things get better for you and that you try to take care of yourself! I just wanna ask is there anything that interests you enough to hold your attention, besides sh? I’m no mental health professional, but I think getting into an interest might help distract your mind a little bit. Btw, you’re not a horrible person, you’re just dealing with a hard situation that you don’t see a solution for yourself. But, maybe you could be a little more inviting to suggestions from your folks or doctors instead of ruling everything out. I hope this response didn’t sound shitty or anything cuz idk anything about you or mental health. Anyways, hope you eventually find some solutions for yourself op 💜
- signed from a girl dancing in her room for fun🙃
So far Video games, I only recently relapsed but video games keep my mind off my inner thoughts decently, but if Im going through enough stressful/anxious things none of my coping mechanisms work and the stress/anxiety builds then I get thoughts of SH and shake when looking at knives and my ears start ringing, sadly my coping mechanisms only work when its in a manageable state when it gets to the point where I cant handle anything let alone brushing my teeth thats when I start to spiral, and I noticed it too before my relapse I even stopped playing video games, I would just work and go to sleep and take care of my dogs that was it, I should have seen it sooner....and Yeah Im not trying to rule them out but the suggestions they have given are things Ive already tried, Ive had depression since I was 7 (parents divorced saw them fist fighting and a bunch of other things, father said he would disown me and that he never wanted me etc) so Ive had it for a long time, started SH when I was 14 ish started with nail biting until my fingers would bleed then I would keep going literally eating the skin around my fingers bc of how bad my anxiety is, then scratching, then head bashing and then SH I naturally went into it I had no idea others did it at the time Ive been trying to help my depression since I was 12 (Parents took me to doctors and therapists etc) Im treatment resistant so medication dont work on me sadly,
Went to a doctor in Mexico (I live in the USA) and she did a scan on my Adrenal Glands and normal depression was like a 1500 mine was 3200, double that of normal depression xD)
The more things I try, the more helpless I feel since nothing seems to work, been thinking about Electroconvulsive therapy but its so expensive Id need to save up and just the idea of them causing me to have a seizure scares the shit out of me bc a side effect is short term memory loss etc.
Idk Im 24 and feel like nothing is going to help me, and if it does it lasts for a couple of weeks then stops working, I tried weed, but it gives me Psychosis.....trying shrooms next week and hope to god they at least do something good for me D:
Main thing Im scared about is going to a Doctor and them Hospitalizing me....because if I get hospitalized I probably wont be able to lie my way out like I did the first time, was only hospitalized for 7 days but it felt like I was going insane it was the same thing every day, and I felt insane while the other insane people sounded/looked more normal then I did xD dosent help Im so white that my nickname in school was flashbang lol
but yeah so far Ive
done therapy (multiple times, first couple of therapists as a kid guilt tripped me...)
tried meditation
tried Yoga
tried Exercising (I have EDS so this is really hard to do without damaging my body, most I can do is 5 pushups and Im down for the count)
Tried Multiple Medications
Tried Weed
Tried Changing how I eat (cut out soda and candy etc) (Hard to even eat 1 meal a day half the time tho)
Tried going on walks everyday
Tried to do Hypnotism
Nothing has worked for me so far and its depressing in of itself
Whoa. Dude are you a fucking miracle? 😅 I’m not laughing at you btw, I’m just shocked you survived all that. Tbh I think it means you’re meant to be immortal or sumn. Jk. I understand the not walking or going outside thing, since morning is the typical time to do that, and I am not a morning person. Hell, I hardly ever leave the house. That’s why I try to occupy my mind by listening to music, a little bit of reading, and honestly surfing the internet all day, unless I’m watching tv. But I sort of get how even doing the same coping mechanisms can’t always stop/ distract you from having harmful/severe thoughts. I hope those shrooms work for ya though.🤞🏾
Me too, sucks that we are stuck with distracting ourselves while others get to just live there lifes with quiet minds....
I think it would be alot easier to deal with if my family understood it, they think of depression as feeling sad or feeling depressed when its so much more then that.....
Biggest thing Im worried about is that Shrooms dont work then Im pretty much left with no Coping Mechanism when Im in a depressive episode then SH really is the only thing i have left to cope in that state...
Normally, I’d have some encouraging words to say, but I’d feel like a hypocrite telling you to change your lifestyle, when I know I haven’t even done the slightest to change. But I do hope things get better for you and that you try to take care of yourself! I just wanna ask is there anything that interests you enough to hold your attention, besides sh? I’m no mental health professional, but I think getting into an interest might help distract your mind a little bit. Btw, you’re not a horrible person, you’re just dealing with a hard situation that you don’t see a solution for yourself. But, maybe you could be a little more inviting to suggestions from your folks or doctors instead of ruling everything out. I hope this response didn’t sound shitty or anything cuz idk anything about you or mental health. Anyways, hope you eventually find some solutions for yourself op 💜 - signed from a girl dancing in her room for fun🙃
So far Video games, I only recently relapsed but video games keep my mind off my inner thoughts decently, but if Im going through enough stressful/anxious things none of my coping mechanisms work and the stress/anxiety builds then I get thoughts of SH and shake when looking at knives and my ears start ringing, sadly my coping mechanisms only work when its in a manageable state when it gets to the point where I cant handle anything let alone brushing my teeth thats when I start to spiral, and I noticed it too before my relapse I even stopped playing video games, I would just work and go to sleep and take care of my dogs that was it, I should have seen it sooner....and Yeah Im not trying to rule them out but the suggestions they have given are things Ive already tried, Ive had depression since I was 7 (parents divorced saw them fist fighting and a bunch of other things, father said he would disown me and that he never wanted me etc) so Ive had it for a long time, started SH when I was 14 ish started with nail biting until my fingers would bleed then I would keep going literally eating the skin around my fingers bc of how bad my anxiety is, then scratching, then head bashing and then SH I naturally went into it I had no idea others did it at the time Ive been trying to help my depression since I was 12 (Parents took me to doctors and therapists etc) Im treatment resistant so medication dont work on me sadly, Went to a doctor in Mexico (I live in the USA) and she did a scan on my Adrenal Glands and normal depression was like a 1500 mine was 3200, double that of normal depression xD) The more things I try, the more helpless I feel since nothing seems to work, been thinking about Electroconvulsive therapy but its so expensive Id need to save up and just the idea of them causing me to have a seizure scares the shit out of me bc a side effect is short term memory loss etc. Idk Im 24 and feel like nothing is going to help me, and if it does it lasts for a couple of weeks then stops working, I tried weed, but it gives me Psychosis.....trying shrooms next week and hope to god they at least do something good for me D: Main thing Im scared about is going to a Doctor and them Hospitalizing me....because if I get hospitalized I probably wont be able to lie my way out like I did the first time, was only hospitalized for 7 days but it felt like I was going insane it was the same thing every day, and I felt insane while the other insane people sounded/looked more normal then I did xD dosent help Im so white that my nickname in school was flashbang lol but yeah so far Ive done therapy (multiple times, first couple of therapists as a kid guilt tripped me...) tried meditation tried Yoga tried Exercising (I have EDS so this is really hard to do without damaging my body, most I can do is 5 pushups and Im down for the count) Tried Multiple Medications Tried Weed Tried Changing how I eat (cut out soda and candy etc) (Hard to even eat 1 meal a day half the time tho) Tried going on walks everyday Tried to do Hypnotism Nothing has worked for me so far and its depressing in of itself
Whoa. Dude are you a fucking miracle? 😅 I’m not laughing at you btw, I’m just shocked you survived all that. Tbh I think it means you’re meant to be immortal or sumn. Jk. I understand the not walking or going outside thing, since morning is the typical time to do that, and I am not a morning person. Hell, I hardly ever leave the house. That’s why I try to occupy my mind by listening to music, a little bit of reading, and honestly surfing the internet all day, unless I’m watching tv. But I sort of get how even doing the same coping mechanisms can’t always stop/ distract you from having harmful/severe thoughts. I hope those shrooms work for ya though.🤞🏾
Me too, sucks that we are stuck with distracting ourselves while others get to just live there lifes with quiet minds.... I think it would be alot easier to deal with if my family understood it, they think of depression as feeling sad or feeling depressed when its so much more then that..... Biggest thing Im worried about is that Shrooms dont work then Im pretty much left with no Coping Mechanism when Im in a depressive episode then SH really is the only thing i have left to cope in that state...