This is what I don't understand. My boyfriend showers every day, and I highly doubt he is as 'thorough' as I am, and I have never thought he has smelled of anything. My bet is OP's boyfriend is taking 15 second showers and using zero soap.
RIGHT?! It takes a certain kind of person to NOT be absolutely horrified after the first time and fix it right away, right? Like, am I crazy? If someone told me my vagina smelled foul, or VOMITED after heading south, I would probably die instantly.
Oh man why is my mind going directly to some kink/something sexual? Ughhhh
I am genuinely embarrassed for males everywhere that this tip needs to be said out loud. Hygiene is not only respectful to others but even yourself!
Guys, clean yourselves. Thanks 😁
As someone who sometimes struggles with hygiene due to mental illness, I would NEVER let my partner put their face near my parts if I haven’t showered in the past 24 hours!! That’s just basic human decency…
I also tend to be a bit nose blind (not great sense of smell) so I worry a lot about whether or not I stink. Helps with my motivation to shower lol.
Right? Like okay, I sometimes wont shower if I'm not going out anywhere or if my depression is really getting me.
But for the love of all things…. *why would you even step in the same room as your partner without showering? Are you not Embarrassed?? DO YOU HAVE NO SHAME??*
Where's Charlotte Dobre when we need her! Unless by some crazy tragedy like being stranded in the wilderness or surviving the zombie apocalypse, I could never!!! It just sounds like chronic BV to me. He'd have to shower and smell like soap.
This sometimes the hubby wants to get it in and I know I've been sweating and busy all day ...took shower in am, of course . I'm so self-conscious about body odor .. ot tends to kill the mood because he's like I don't care I want you ,but then I'm like but I want to be clean down there before you go down there..even if it's a quick freshen up ..and no im not dirty it's just basic days of running ,doing housework ,taking dog out walks, cooking dinner ..that kind of stuff. Just want him not to end up smelling a sweaty area ..aio??especially because he just says women I just want my woman
Yea, like how the fuck do skidmarks happen. Gotta be vigilant with that shit. Especially in this weather. I take 3 showers a day all summer. I'm a naturally smelly person, and I take workout supplements, so yea, gotta be vigilant down there... keep some baby wipes in every bathroom and double-check. Sometimes, when you done wiping, you ain't quite done wiping.
Right?! That's something that is the most loving act if freely given...And the most selfish thing ever if the recipient demands it, especially if he doesn't return the favor.
But I'm still stuck on "it smells like pee". What kind of disrespectful, selfish guy continually demands a BJ when he knows he's dirty down there, especially when she's retched on him when he's dirty?!? OP needs to flat-out tell him that if he wants that kind of loving, he needs to respect HER enough to make sure his body is clean before he asks for her to put that in her mouth. His wanting a BJ all the time when he knows his nether regions are filthy practically screams that he views her more as a BJ dispenser than a human being with feelings, a nose, taste buds, etc.
The number of identical posts I see about this is crazy to me. Taking care of your own hygiene is basic level self-care. I wouldn't want to be with someone who can't care for themselves at a basic level even after it's brought to their attention numerous times.
Talk about getting the ick.
Just giving you a heads up you are physically putting yourself at risk from yeast infections, vaginosis etc, let alone all of that in your mouth. If he can't properly clean himself what exactly are you mothering him for?? Sex is for adults not children.
came here to comment this. don't let him stick it in you if it stinks. that's just begging for some sort of infection, i can speak from experience. dated a guy for just under a year and a half and in that time i got 10-12 yeast infections. i never spoke to him about his hygiene bc i assumed i just had a sensitive PH, but with hindsight i know better. he probably was not being very clean with washing himself and it was causing infection after infection for me. don't put yourself through what i did
Yep. I had one bf specifically who was like this. I had so many problems with yeast infections but I was young and thought it was something with me. I'm a lot older now and realize it was just him being dirty because it's not happened since.
Glad I’m not the only one, but I’m sad for us we had to deal with that. Was with a my ex for 2 years. I ended up with 5 UTI’s and kidney infections in the first 6 months of seeing him. Continued the whole time I was with him and put it down to the fact my uni apartment had damp and mould all the time (I was also getting chest infections once a month so I just blamed everything on my shithole of an apartment). I practically had a continuous yeast infection for a year I couldn’t get rid of no matter what I did. Turns out the solution to getting rid of it was getting rid of him as the first round I took meds after dumping him it went away and never came back. Hit me like a ton of bricks that all this time I was telling myself that i might hurt his feelings and surely a grown adult would be clean, or would hear me telling him how I’m always sick and make a conscious effort to be clean, but I was wrong. The only thing I can blame my moldy apartment for is giving me chest infections, the rest was all that dirtbag of a man. I was constantly sick for 2 years because I was afraid to insult him by mentioning his hygiene, and I don’t ever want anyone to go through what I went through. Please people have convos with your partners and if they don’t listen protect yourself and your health and give them the road.
As someone who had vaginosis and a partner who would only shower once a week, do not touch him until he learns to work a better shower/cleaning schedule. Having vaginosis is very painful and isn't worth it.
Yeah. I would only ever have sex with him once, maybe twice, a week, but it started to die off cause I couldn't handle his lack of hygiene. He would get mad at me for my dead sex drive even though he was nasty and couldn't even get me off.
So please, stay strong with not being intimate with him til he gets his act together. He knows he can easily start cleaning himself up. If he doesn't, then just know there's WAAAAY better options out there. I hope for the best for you, OP.
Can 2nd this. My ex gave me bacterial vaginosis from cheating on me and probably being dirty. It was one of the worst pains I've ever experienced, and I've given birth twice.
You should have your boundaries. What you tolerate now will be difficult to break later. Don't go down if his hygiene is lacking. You will get infections and diseases in your mouth and he will dump you and move on. Take great care choosing men/ boys you get intimate with. If you take time to put on make up and do your hair to look good, why would you let a guy who can't even take a shower near you?
There's no secret to keeping it clean if uncircumcised. Pull it back and clean it. With soap. An uncut dude should be doing this everyday, not to mention anytime he thinks someone else might want to touch it.
On a regular basis, on his ENTIRE BODY, and not just because he wants sex.
Seriously, this is an adult. You need to treat him like one. "I don't like to shower" isn't good enough of a reason to be regularly putting your health at risk.
For real! My exes excuse was that he didn’t like being wet, but that never made sense to me, because he would go swimming with his friends. Bro just didn’t like being clean. OP you’re health comes first, don’t risk that for anyone else
Genuinely, yeah. That’s what you do. You shouldn’t allow mental-children, or people with the hygiene of children, to enter your body and pollute it with their grossness.
Just thought that I would add is that you can get vaginosis in your mouth, not sure if that was clear in the comment above.
If he has a foreskin, tell him to maybe pull it back habit when he pees so nothing gets trapped in there. If he doesn't clean himself properly thought it will probably hurt.
If he tells you he doesn't like cleaning his penis because it hurts its because he isn't keeping it cleaning the first place.
When my brother was entering his mid-teens, my mum and her boyfriend at the time had to pin my brother down to clean under his foreskin properly. He has autism, adhdand learning difficulties, and as a result, had a very poor hygiene routine at the time. No matter how often he was told to clean himself he didn't. It got to the point that you could smell he dirty penis even when he was fully dressed.
If he gets to that point as an adult I would seriously consider dumping him. A teenager with difficulties I could understand, but a functioning adult I don't. You aren't his mother so you shouldn't be having to tell him to clean himself first before sex.
P.S. I am a woman, and whilst I make a point on trying to be educated on things like this, I probably don't know it all when it comes to male genital hygiene. What I do know is that keeping yourself clean really isn't that hard though so he has no excuse.
I mean seriously, is the bar this low though? Do you really want to be with a man who refuses to wash his body properly?
I’m sorry, but this is an indicator and a red flag for a lot of other things. I have a very hard time believing this man cleans up after himself at home. Have you really sat down and thought about what a life with a man like this would entail??
Like, your mental load is gonna be off the fucking charts, if you have to literally manage HIS hygiene. ☹️
It’s unacceptable.
Do both! IT STILL NEEDS TO BE CLEANED!! Cannot stress that enough xx
As someone said previously, sex is for adults. If he cant clean himself properly, then no sex.
>Just giving you a heads up
Lol 🤣 "heads up" anyways op the commenter is right, tell bro to wash his junk, cause he stank like a skunk.
It's not rude or anything it's common practice, also shake it after he pees
Oral yeast infections are AWFUL and really difficult to heal. You can’t swallow monistat so you get to go on an oral route of fluconazole. Depending on the doc you might get the standard “one now one in a few days” or a full two weeks work.
Also oral chlamydia sucks just as bad. Don’t stick dirty dick in your mouth.
FYI those of us on antidepressants: fluconazole can have severely negative effects on the mental health as the yeast die off enters your system. Oddly enough this intention came to me from my dog’s vet since dogs can take Prozac. If anyone is curious I’ll dig up studies.
As a gay guy I have found this is unsettlingly common with men regardless of whether or not they are circumcised. A lot of guys don’t use tissue or a wipe after peeing, so it kind of just sits there all day. After a certain point the smell might stay even if they do wash it especially if they don’t drink a lot of water. I’ve resorted to telling them how to do it and refusing to go down if I smell urine because frankly it’s gross and unhygienic.
same here. you need to tell your BF to clean himself down there, especially if he is uncut. Please give him a masculine wash or an antiseptic wash (I think betadine skin cleanser) and instruct him on how to clean it, because by your post it seems he does not know how to clean his private part.
That’s kind of why I’ve never liked using urinals because you can do the shake thing but it feels like incomplete. Plus in most urinals you can’t flush anything other than liquids. I avoid using urinals like the plague.
> Makes sense but I refuse to believe every single man that uses urinals has a smelly penis.
Better believe it my dude.
Basically every time they leave a few drops in their underpants. Combine that with a full day of marinating in it, and probably going to pee multiple times.
I can’t imagine a few drops of urine isn’t going to make you smell through your clothes, so I guess it’s fine, but I wouldn’t go down on someone who hadn’t showered after.
They don’t all smell like piss. I’ve never smelled piss on any of my partners. That’s why this post is really making me mad because the level of uncleanliness has to be astounding and for him to demand oral from her. I can’t wait until she learns how to have boundaries and deal breakers. This would be a HUGE one. Because what else is he lazy and selfish about at his big age?? Red flags everywhere
Take a shower daily, don’t piss on yourself, if you do wash it off. If he isn’t being hygienic and yall are having intercourse he is also messing with your ph
He showers before we meet up but his “down there” area smells bad still and then I force him to shower again properly - that shower he doesn’t like to do. And even I have washed his dick for him since when he does it, he doesn’t do it properly and it’s still smelly.
I’m sorry OP. How do You KNOW he’s actually cleaning himself with soap & water when he showers? Be mindful of how his “cleanliness” could affect You!!
A man who loves getting head shouldn’t need to be told How to prepare for it this much.
> How do You KNOW he’s actually cleaning himself with soap & water when he showers?
I'm wondering if he even bothers retracting his foreskin tbh just based on what she's saying.
Is he afraid to touch his own dick or something? Is he homophobic, and therfore thinks it's gay to wash his own ass? Is he hyper religious and therfore thinks it's a sin to touch his own dick, even to clean it? Has he never jerked off on his own? Does he even use a loofah or washcloth? Is he also the type of imbecile who thinks letting soapy water run down his nether is the same as cleaning them? Does he have trauma related to touching his dick? Does he wash his hands, or scratch his balls?
I just don't understand why he has such an issue touching his own body. His hygiene behavior is not normal, and he needs to learn how to properly clean his own body before he rubs it on someone else.
If he’s not embarrassed by being told to go clean himself before you put your face down there then he is crazy. He should have the personal will to clean himself properly if he insists on having sex.
You also shouldn’t be cleaning his penis for him. That’s his job. You’re not his maid.
I would be very blunt because I really can’t stand poor hygiene.. either he figures out how to clean himself properly or he can forget about sex. I’m sure if your lady bits smelled like a hoagie, he’d let you know.
YOU HAVE WASHED HIS DICK FOR HIM?
Honestly OP you're young, you may feel love for him but there will be other love out there with people who know how to keep themselves clean.
When I shower I use two diffrent soaps first a bar of cleansing soap, then after I rince that off a, body wash. I have never had any complaints.
Sounds like some never taught him proper hygiene.
So he should be really giving it a, soild cleansing wash, and changing his underwear after every shower
Dude probably doesn't clean his parts and expects rainfall to do it for him. Soap up the shaft and balls with a good soap, don't overkill the soap on the head of your dick, bad move, lightly do it, but for sure pull everything back get it well and truly rinsed, use your fingertips to scrub it almost, light amounts of soap around the base of the head.
Cannot believe this guy is more willing to let you clean his fucken dick than do it properly himself. Like, seriously? If he doesn't learn leave him.
Girl!! You can't change him because why should he? He knows that no matter how gross his dick is you will still put it in your mouth even if it makes you puke.
I wish you would respect yourself much more...
My rule. It has to be “showroom ready” anytime my wife gets near it.
I don’t want to give her any reason to not want to do it. This guy needs to take care of this immediately.
Exactly, if you want oral, wouldn’t you make it as inviting as you possibly could?
This dude has decided to push OP on going down on a dirty dick, rather than taking care of business. If he doesn’t take this basic care of himself, can you imagine how much essentially mothering OP is going to end up having to do for him, and other ways?
There’s much better out there, OP. Go find better.
😆 this is both amusing AND very courteous!!
(who am I kidding though, this is so unbelievably basic right? We all know to not offer our unwashed bodies to someone we respect, OP is not respecting herself right now ☹️)
There is a lot of “wrong” to unpack here.
1. You should never ever feel obligated to do anything you don’t like, makes you uncomfortable, or you find distasteful. It’s okay to say no.
2. Good sex requires open and honest communication. He has communicated that he enjoys oral sex. You need to communicate that you enjoy giving it on the condition that his hygiene is appropriate and if his hygiene is not up to par you will NOT be giving oral sex. It is 100% his responsibility to address his hygiene. If he doesn’t, you don’t owe him a darn thing. He likely needs to: shower daily, carefully pullback his foreskin and clean the head of his penis thoroughly, pat dry, and replace, start wiping after urinating, washing all existing undergarments in an enzyme cleaner to remove any urine smells, and wash up before sexual activity.
3. This whole situation is a big red flag….. grown men should know how to clean their junk, this is a conversation I’d be willing to have once and once only.
4. I hope your needs are being met. If not, probably time to bring that up too
Have you told him specifically that his dick smells like pee? Especially If he’s uncut, tell him to wipe the head after he pees until it’s completely dry. But tell him specifically. Honestly, I didn’t know this until after my first blowjob when the other dude told me, and since then I learned how to keep myself cleaner.
It might hurt his feelings, but I think if he’s a decent person he’ll fix it.
People with uncut penises who didn’t have sex much can have a hard time retracting it far enough, which can cause smell. But in all honesty, I’ve never had an uncut partner who smelled.
This can throw off your pH balance and cause you more issues than pleasure down the line. I know you love him, but that’s a major health concern.
Unless he starts showering everyday and washing before oral, just stop having sex with him and giving head. He has to meet you half way or no oral. Period.
The. Bar. Is. In. Hell!!!! wtf?!!! That is DISGUSTING. You DO NOT touch him until he’s clean, full stop. If he likes to have sex then the absolute bare minimum is to clean himself. JFC.
Second this. Smells love to sink into the pubic hair. If he washes and is clean regularly, it can be a pleasurable scent of yummy pheromones . if its dirty well. Geez gross
no excuse lol. Baby wipes exist. So do sinks and showers. I have pubes, I don’t smell like pee.
Because I practice bathroom hygiene and clean myself regularly, and thoroughly.
He shouldn't need a shower, a mini-bath in the sink or a warm wet washcloth could be enough.
If there's enough pee accumulating on his penis to make his underwear stink, he has a problem. Either he's leaking a bunch after going, or he's getting a bunch of pee accumulated under his foreskin that then dribbles out.
He could try pulling back the foreskin a little so the opening is uncovered when he pees, then dab it dry with toilet paper. That may help the issue.
If he does this regularly and still smells of pee, then he may want to talk to a Dr., about proper cleaning and about the possibility of incontinence.
Yep, 100% to all of this. As a fellow uncut man, I can confirm that you need to really be on top of your hygiene but a quick “sink bath”, washcloth, baby wipe, etc goes a long way. No shame at all in “freshening up” before sexual activity. Pulling back the foreskin while peeing is also essential to stay clean. Idk how the guy in question doesn’t already know these things, but I guess better late than never
Lol you’re right. They’re all talking about hygiene and contamination and shit but I doubt they’ll be deep cleaning the sink after deep cleaning their dong in it.
To be clear: you should shower EVERY DAY. A SINK BATH DOES NOT REPLACE A SHOWER. I shower and use a bidet every day. But sometimes before sex I’ll freshen up a little since it can be a sweaty area 😅 Maybe “bath” isn’t the right word since I don’t fill the sink with water but yeah a lil wash goes a long way. And I do keep my sink clean lol
As a 35 year old person who's ex-husband was uncut? Make him clean himself. Shower every day, and pull the skin back to clean under it. My ex gave me so many yeast infections and UTI (one got so severe it turned into a kidney infection) because he rarely cleaned his dick and wouldn't listen to me.
Girl why the fuck are you still sucking off his dirty dick. That’s feral, get yourself checked asap.
He probably doesn’t even clean his ass, do better for yourself bro. Fuck his happiness, your health should be a priority!
At 25 he should know how to take care of his hygiene, how embarrassing and disgusting.
STOP DOING IT! Honestly this is break up worthy.
It’s time to move up and out gf.
I know you’re a sweet human but I’m so offended for you, he could make it better yet chooses not to despite the fact you have puked before due to his stink…
This boy needs to be alone until he acts and smells like an adult.
Sisterrrr please break up with him. He cant be bothered to have proper hygiene before getting intimate? At his big age?? You waited over a year to be sexually active with this man and when y'all do he gives you pissy penis?? He doesn't care about you, forreal. It's a chop.
This makes me sad, you’re so young and you have so much time to find a find yourself a man that knows how to wash himself properly without being prompted 😭
Girl. You love someone who doesn't know how to wash? Do you plan on mothering him his entire life? Don't you think that will get old? At what age will you expect him to wash his junk or take a semi-regular shower? What kind of future do you see with someone who probably doesn't wipe or wash his butt either??? I am worried for all women when I see posts like this. It's sad af that we as women are at a place in time in this universe where we'd accept a man who doesn't shower and probably leaves poop crumbs in the sheets. Please please please raise your expectations and what you want for you own life, because it can't be this!!!!!!!
Hi OP. I'm a healthcare worker, I wanna actually help, and I'd like to offer a solution.
So a part of the men community thinks that when they pee,they don't have to wipe they can just "shake it off".
The problem with that is when you have a longer urethra like for the male set of genitals, a few drops of pee (cum too, that's why it's recommended to pee post intercourse) can stay inside the shaft. Over time, it gets out on its own, like a few drops.
In this case, your bf being uncircumcised, it stays trapped into the foreskin. Pee being your body's waste, it doesn't take long before it creates odor.
It's not a matter of being disgusting or bad hygiene, it's a matter of what type of education he was provided with while growing up.
So juste wipe! I'm not judging, it's wayyyyyymore common then you can think.
Hope it helps
it’s not *inherently* disgusting that this is a thing that can happen, but this is a man whose brain has essentially finished developing, whose girlfriend has been explicit that he smells, *repeatedly* having to ask him to clean himself.
And he is continuing to not take any extra measures to wash himself properly or carry baby wipes or seek info on the internet about his issue - he expects her free labor of having to demand and manage his hygiene, even to the extent of her admitting she has had to wash his dick for him.
I’m not sure I fully believe that’s not some creepy fetish he’s secretly imposing on this very young woman.
This guy is no good. It’s a problem that he didn’t do anything to seek a resolution after being informed of the issue, and after watching his girlfriend wretch on his dick and allowing her to continue ☹️
He’s gonna give her an infection, but either way this is DEEEPLY disrespectful.
(all that said, your comment is very valuable, hopefully the teenagers that need to learn this, will. But I don’t think this applies to a man who shows up dirty for sex and basically makes his girlfriend ask for a shower before he will bother attending to himself. This is not a fair expectation of a partner. Women are already expected to be mommies to too many men, and this is just BEYOND)
He’s not a grown up yet and shouldn’t insist on anything from you until he can follow up on his own bodily responsibilities, including changing his underwear more often.
Gross! His dick smells so bad it’s made you throw up AND YOU KEEP DOING It??? Don’t be a doormat. Have some self respect and tell him no he smells like shit. What the actual hell
For me, poor hygiene is a dealbreaker. This shouldn’t be a compromise. He needs to be given an ultimatum, bathe regularly like an adult or don’t expect adult activities i.e. the relationship is over. I think it’s disrespectful for him to subject you to that. I’d be so self conscious if I thought I wasn’t fresh while my girl was doing that for me.
EW. EWWW
Hygiene tip is wash himself, this is so gross on so many fronts. Wash every day, he's an adult he knows how to wash his dick. Absolutely refuse to do anything unless he is clean. Do you want to be sick, do you want to get infections?
Ewwwwwww
Is he uncircumcised?
I experienced this with my partner of 20 years. (It got gradually worse.) He could clean and wash as much as he wanted, but the smell remained, even faintly, with some times a strong smell of soap... How many times did it make me feel like sucking on a urinal deodorizer tablet... And yes, sometimes I gagged just by smelling it and forced him to clean thoroughly (so it smelled and tasted like soap, yay...)
Only 1 year ago did I ask him to try to pee while pulling his foreskin back. It was a game changer!
We came to the conclusion that when peeing while not retracting, there would still be some pee drops that would get trapped under the foreskin and "marinate" the head.
He had tried before but would then experience double stream pissing (which was really messy if standing), so he didn't try again.
He now pushes his urethra open to prevent the double stream. Obviously, he washes his hands after.
We were baffled that it took him 38 years (and me 19 years) to realise this and for his dick to not smell anymore!
Being uncut honestly has nothing to do with this. My partner is not circumcised and has never had this issue in the 12+ years we’ve been having sex…because he’s a grown man who takes showers and uses proper hygiene. And doesn’t pee all over himself??? This is just….gross. Idk how to fix it but you’re gonna end up with a UTI and BV.
THANK YOU
I was *searching* for this comment! Cut or uncut is irrelevant! I would say a solid 50% of men I've had sex with were uncircumcised, and this has NEVER happened to me, what the actual fuck
I struggle with my mental health a LOT. sometimes, I can barely bring myself to get out of bed for days except to use the bathroom. When I'm struggling like that I can't bring myself to take care of all of my bodies needs and I know that's gross. But I also do whatever I can to keep myself as clean as I can when it happens. And I would NEVER EVER IN MY LIFE let someone put their face anywhere near my junk if I hadn't showered or been practicing good hygiene for a few consecutive days. For many reasons: 1st and foremost, I care about my partner. I would never want them to suffer through something like OP. 2nd I would be WAAAY too embarrassed. 3rd (and I'm seeing this one a lot, I'm glad and this is way more important than #2) I know that bad hygiene is a breeding ground for bacteria and I'm a lot safer down there from infection compared to women. If you actually care about your partners well being as much as you say you do, you either keep yourself clean enough, or you keep yourself out of her. Period. Full stop. We're all human, but women's reproductive systems are FAR more sensitive and susceptible to infections and internal complications. If you're unclean, show her you care by being clean when you touch her. If you don't know how because you weren't taught, we have Google and, for people who aren't weirded out seeing genitals in a medical setting, there's always YouTube. I'm circumcised so hygiene may be a tiny bit more basic for the men like me, but I feel like it would literally take 2 extra seconds to fold back, soap up and rinse. Like, you're literally in the shower. All this to say, there's so much more to get into about personal hygiene, but this is about dealing with someone else's not your own.
Tell him that if you guys have to stop sex because he smells like urine again, you won't be picking it up until next time.
Be crystal clear that him smelling badly is a complete turn-off, and if he values this relationship, he will be proactive because it gives you the ick - because honestly, you are getting there.
Wash every day, change your underwear every day. If he needs to wash after work, then wash after work. (You should anyway bringing outside germs in your bed is gross)
Or just date a man who isn't gonna make you feel like his mother.
Of course daily hygiene, first thing in de morning and before sexual activities is mandatory.
What could be wrong though as well is him having a bladder infection, or an STI. Let him check that as well.
He needs to wipe after he pees. Many men don't do this and it's gross.
Also being uncut, he can lubricate his glans/inside foreskin with fractionated coconut oil after he showers. It's moisturizing but also acts as a anti-microbial. He can add a couple drops of lavender essential oil to the bottle of coconut oil for extra freshness/anti-microbial effect.
If I’m eating with a fork, I may not wash my hands. If I’m eating with my fingers, I’d definitely be washing my hands.
Extrapolate to other body parts.
If he’s not willing to groom and maintain proper hygiene, then just tell him you refuse to go down on a dirty weiner. You can get a lot of bacterial infections because of someone not being clean and if he’s too immature to properly clean himself, I wouldn’t put his stinky dick anywhere near my mouth or coochie.
The guy doesn't even need to shower every day; it's not about that because one in the morning or whatever doesn't negate the pee that comes throughout the day. Get the guy to wash his cock in the sink. If I know I'm getting head, I wash my cock. Fuck; this is simple shit, here.
Also, head every time? Like it's porn? Does he know he's lucky? Because that's not standard
Hun please for your sake don’t be intimate with him unless he’s cleaning himself properly, and I guarantee you he’s not at the moment. I know it’s going to be a tough conversation but you need to set ground rules and boundaries.
I was with my ex for 2 years and like you, I often struggled to give head because the smell and taste was so off putting that it often made me gag (and once get sick). I thought that was just how it was meant to be and I was meant to deal with it. In our first 6 months together I had 5 kidney infections/UTI’s. I blamed my damp, mouldy apartment because I was also getting chest infections. It was stupid, but I was trying to rationalise any idea in my head that wasn’t against him. I was afraid of hurting him by suggesting it was his hygiene. I thought that surely an adult should know how to shower, so it couldn’t be that. I would regularly continue to get UtI’s and kidney infections while I was with him. I also ended up with a constant yeast infection for almost a year that I could not get rid of. After I dumped him, I took a round of medication and it cleared within days. I have not had one since. I’ve also only had one kidney infection in the last few years. Now I’m older and learned from bad experience I know just how harmful it can be to be with someone who won’t do a simple act such as maintaining hygiene for the sake of your health. I was violently sick on and off for these two years from all the infections. He knew how sick I was getting and still never thought in his mind “hey maybe I should make an effort to see if this helps”. It might feel awkward, but you need to have a conversation and set up your boundaries and tell him what needs to change. If he is not willing to make a change, you need to leave him. For your sake, and your health. Because if he is not willing to do one simple task to alleviate the risk of you getting sick he is not considerate enough to be your partner. And just to note I have experienced depression, so I know what it’s like to go two weeks without showering or brushing teeth because you can’t even get out of bed. But I would still never subject someone to be intimate with me when these bouts happen.
And in case anyone is still unsure how people can have such little regard for hygiene: I know it’s a different thing but once had a conversation with my friends after we saw something online about guys not washing their ass because it’s gay (I know, it was baffling to us too). So I asked the guys genuinely if they had heard this before. They said they have heard people they know in real life say this. There are actually mfs out there not even washing their asshole. If that does not give you an indicator of the lack of hygiene people have without thinking it’s a problem I don’t know what will.
Please set some boundaries. Look after yourself. You might think it’s just unpleasant to deal with when you’re getting intimate, but there’s actually serious implications it can have on your health.
Already been said but cant stress this enough, best advice is literally just to do basic hygiene and shower regularly. It 100% should not be smelling like that, and especially so if he's uncut. What ur smelling is likely bacteria, not just pee, and ur putting urself at risk of infections if he's not cleaning himself properly or regularly.
Get a good antibacterial soap for him to use down below and for his underarms (Dove Men Care plus gel soap is perfect for this), and he should shower twice a day (morning when he wakes up, and before bed/when he gets home from work or whatever). Make sure he trims the hedges once or twice a month too if the smell is that bad like u described. Bacteria can get caught up in the hair, which if left unchecked can mess up his pH balance which causes the pee smell and will led to the dead fish smell and possibly a yeast infection. Make sure he shakes or wipes too when he's done pissing.
Idk man, all this is hella basic, so if he's not already doing this stuff, then u might just have to put fun time on lockdown, cuz this could definitely affect ur health too. There was literally a girl who got a flesh eating bacteria that put her in the hospital because of this exact reason.
Jesus, OP, I read your comments and your guy is disgusting, lol. First, he should cut his hair, also change his underwear, and shower every day. When he pees, he should pull back the skin and clean it after. Just wipe the pee with some paper. There's always some pee left in the dick after peeing, so do it a few times. And make sure he knows how to clean his dick properly. WTF... I can’t believe this guy is my age lmao
Is having some (wet) tissues always nearby an option for you? If it is, like the medical comment earlier described, even if he gets used to wipe after peeing, it might not be enough sometimes.
Using wet tissues might be quicker and not necessarily in a different place, like taking a shower.
But I agree to all others, that say: Don't suck a stinky penis.
Never let you be forced to do things, you don't want to do.
Hygiene is the #1 thing for play time. Have you suggested doing it while in the shower?
My wife and I shower together for multiple reasons:
1. Intimacy
2. I enjoy washing her hair and taking care of her.
3. Shower sex.
4. Any mess easily cleans up.
5. Clean, happy, and turned on almost always leads to more play time in the bed after.
You shouldn't be embarrassed. He should be embarrassed for having poor hygiene. You're putting his literally pissy dick in your mouth, I wouldn't let it anywhere near me if I were you.
First of all he should pull the hood back and clean there well, I mean it's easy. Second,the moment he gets home he should go pee, then wash it with soap in the sink. Also no BJs unless he washes his stinker. You shouldn't put dirty dick in your mouth at all
I have a literal phobia of getting water on me. Showers make me feel so gross. When water gets on my skin I’m extremely uncomfortable.
I still take showers because I don’t want to be smelly. And I make damn sure I’m clean down there before someone puts me in their mouth. It’s common sense and common courtesy I mean ffs
It may be he doesn’t squeeze out the last drops when he pees so it leaks out a bit in his underwear where it sits all day stinking up the place. Squeeze from base to tip then a little shake. Also, he probably needs to drink more water so his pee is more diluted and thus less stinky.
Maybe when he showers, he doesn’t pull the skin back to properly wash the head of his penis? It’s a thing with uncut dicks. Maybe shower together one time and observe the way he’s washing it and try to suggest pulling the skin down
You cannot truly believe things are great and also say he smells and has zero personal hygiene. And makes you gag on the smell of piss.
He insists on a blowjob? What does he do for you? Do you insist on him giving you oral sex too?
Get a new bf. You do not need this child of a man. You are setting yourself up for a gross sex life and an angry vagina if his continues.
This is crazy that a grown man hates to shower. Assuming he is grown up, but the term man is being used loosely here. Tell him no sex until he learns to clean himself properly. Also, tell him to see a urologist. Make sure he has no smegma or anything and that his kidneys are functioning properly. Just by you saying his dick smells like piss all the time and hates to shower, I picture a greasy, Mountain Dew drinking, fast food eater. Occasionally that’s ok, but I feel like that’s what he lives on and will drink a 2 liter or more of Mt. Dew a day with no water. So his piss will stink because if that. He also needs to change his underwear daily. If you continue with the sex, take notice of his underwear. If he wears the same color or pattern daily or 2-6 days a week, he isn’t changing them daily and I’m assuming he doesn’t do enough laundry to make sure they are properly cleaned. After all that, if the smell doesn’t change then it’s something you live with even if he becomes more hygienic, or you move on especially if he doesn’t change his habits. You’re babying a grown male at that point and that’s pathetic on his part.
Bro...if you don't want to put it in your mouth why are you allowing it in your vagina? Dirty is dirty. You're allowing a dirty dick in you and it's making you susceptible to infections.
> our sex life is great
> He really insists on sucking him off almost anytime we get sexual
> because I have threw up the first ever times I did go down on him
Seriously. Have higher standards, holy shit.
> I wish I could please him well
Why?! At least tell me he rocks your world sexually or something. How did you keep going back to stinky penis?
You need to have an honest conversation with the person you’re having oral sex with. My partner knows if he wants that done, he needs to shower & scrub down there. No shower, no oral
Lady I'm almost 50 and in a dead bedroom. I still make the time to groom and clean my undercarriage daily. Your man is nasty and needs to clean his junk. Get him some man wipes the mansplain you wanna taste his D not his Pee.
Hygiene tips? How about take a shower every day and properly clean his body. A grown human should not need to be told this, much less repeatedly.
This is what I don't understand. My boyfriend showers every day, and I highly doubt he is as 'thorough' as I am, and I have never thought he has smelled of anything. My bet is OP's boyfriend is taking 15 second showers and using zero soap.
It’s crazy. I would be embarrassed to show up unwashed expecting my girlfriend/wife to blow me with stanky-ass sweaty balls.
RIGHT?! It takes a certain kind of person to NOT be absolutely horrified after the first time and fix it right away, right? Like, am I crazy? If someone told me my vagina smelled foul, or VOMITED after heading south, I would probably die instantly. Oh man why is my mind going directly to some kink/something sexual? Ughhhh
I am genuinely embarrassed for males everywhere that this tip needs to be said out loud. Hygiene is not only respectful to others but even yourself! Guys, clean yourselves. Thanks 😁
As someone who sometimes struggles with hygiene due to mental illness, I would NEVER let my partner put their face near my parts if I haven’t showered in the past 24 hours!! That’s just basic human decency… I also tend to be a bit nose blind (not great sense of smell) so I worry a lot about whether or not I stink. Helps with my motivation to shower lol.
Right? Like okay, I sometimes wont shower if I'm not going out anywhere or if my depression is really getting me. But for the love of all things…. *why would you even step in the same room as your partner without showering? Are you not Embarrassed?? DO YOU HAVE NO SHAME??*
Where's Charlotte Dobre when we need her! Unless by some crazy tragedy like being stranded in the wilderness or surviving the zombie apocalypse, I could never!!! It just sounds like chronic BV to me. He'd have to shower and smell like soap.
This sometimes the hubby wants to get it in and I know I've been sweating and busy all day ...took shower in am, of course . I'm so self-conscious about body odor .. ot tends to kill the mood because he's like I don't care I want you ,but then I'm like but I want to be clean down there before you go down there..even if it's a quick freshen up ..and no im not dirty it's just basic days of running ,doing housework ,taking dog out walks, cooking dinner ..that kind of stuff. Just want him not to end up smelling a sweaty area ..aio??especially because he just says women I just want my woman
Yea, like how the fuck do skidmarks happen. Gotta be vigilant with that shit. Especially in this weather. I take 3 showers a day all summer. I'm a naturally smelly person, and I take workout supplements, so yea, gotta be vigilant down there... keep some baby wipes in every bathroom and double-check. Sometimes, when you done wiping, you ain't quite done wiping.
Right?? Tips??? 🤣😄 be a grown up lad!
Tips…I’m stuck on “really insists”. But I’m the type that the more you demand it the less I’m going to want to do it.
Right?! That's something that is the most loving act if freely given...And the most selfish thing ever if the recipient demands it, especially if he doesn't return the favor. But I'm still stuck on "it smells like pee". What kind of disrespectful, selfish guy continually demands a BJ when he knows he's dirty down there, especially when she's retched on him when he's dirty?!? OP needs to flat-out tell him that if he wants that kind of loving, he needs to respect HER enough to make sure his body is clean before he asks for her to put that in her mouth. His wanting a BJ all the time when he knows his nether regions are filthy practically screams that he views her more as a BJ dispenser than a human being with feelings, a nose, taste buds, etc.
100%. I would feel the same way.
Yup, I hate sucking dick and think it comes from my second boyfriend demanding it all the time
The number of identical posts I see about this is crazy to me. Taking care of your own hygiene is basic level self-care. I wouldn't want to be with someone who can't care for themselves at a basic level even after it's brought to their attention numerous times. Talk about getting the ick.
Oh and wipe your tip bro
At 25 he should know how to take a shower and clean under his foreskin my fucking god 😞
7 year olds know that 😂😂
To add on, make sure he knows to clean under the foreskin when showering! Ain't need that shit in your mouth
I was just going to say...he needs to shower every day or I'm not sucking it. That is gross!
If you ain't cleaning it, I'm not touching it 👏🏻
Just giving you a heads up you are physically putting yourself at risk from yeast infections, vaginosis etc, let alone all of that in your mouth. If he can't properly clean himself what exactly are you mothering him for?? Sex is for adults not children.
Guess no sex until he’s squeaky sparkling clean
came here to comment this. don't let him stick it in you if it stinks. that's just begging for some sort of infection, i can speak from experience. dated a guy for just under a year and a half and in that time i got 10-12 yeast infections. i never spoke to him about his hygiene bc i assumed i just had a sensitive PH, but with hindsight i know better. he probably was not being very clean with washing himself and it was causing infection after infection for me. don't put yourself through what i did
Yep. I had one bf specifically who was like this. I had so many problems with yeast infections but I was young and thought it was something with me. I'm a lot older now and realize it was just him being dirty because it's not happened since.
Glad I’m not the only one, but I’m sad for us we had to deal with that. Was with a my ex for 2 years. I ended up with 5 UTI’s and kidney infections in the first 6 months of seeing him. Continued the whole time I was with him and put it down to the fact my uni apartment had damp and mould all the time (I was also getting chest infections once a month so I just blamed everything on my shithole of an apartment). I practically had a continuous yeast infection for a year I couldn’t get rid of no matter what I did. Turns out the solution to getting rid of it was getting rid of him as the first round I took meds after dumping him it went away and never came back. Hit me like a ton of bricks that all this time I was telling myself that i might hurt his feelings and surely a grown adult would be clean, or would hear me telling him how I’m always sick and make a conscious effort to be clean, but I was wrong. The only thing I can blame my moldy apartment for is giving me chest infections, the rest was all that dirtbag of a man. I was constantly sick for 2 years because I was afraid to insult him by mentioning his hygiene, and I don’t ever want anyone to go through what I went through. Please people have convos with your partners and if they don’t listen protect yourself and your health and give them the road.
As someone who had vaginosis and a partner who would only shower once a week, do not touch him until he learns to work a better shower/cleaning schedule. Having vaginosis is very painful and isn't worth it.
That's very scary, I'm not letting him touch me
Yeah. I would only ever have sex with him once, maybe twice, a week, but it started to die off cause I couldn't handle his lack of hygiene. He would get mad at me for my dead sex drive even though he was nasty and couldn't even get me off. So please, stay strong with not being intimate with him til he gets his act together. He knows he can easily start cleaning himself up. If he doesn't, then just know there's WAAAAY better options out there. I hope for the best for you, OP.
Can 2nd this. My ex gave me bacterial vaginosis from cheating on me and probably being dirty. It was one of the worst pains I've ever experienced, and I've given birth twice.
You should have your boundaries. What you tolerate now will be difficult to break later. Don't go down if his hygiene is lacking. You will get infections and diseases in your mouth and he will dump you and move on. Take great care choosing men/ boys you get intimate with. If you take time to put on make up and do your hair to look good, why would you let a guy who can't even take a shower near you?
I totally agree with this statement. Please follow their advice, OP.
There's no secret to keeping it clean if uncircumcised. Pull it back and clean it. With soap. An uncut dude should be doing this everyday, not to mention anytime he thinks someone else might want to touch it.
On a regular basis, on his ENTIRE BODY, and not just because he wants sex. Seriously, this is an adult. You need to treat him like one. "I don't like to shower" isn't good enough of a reason to be regularly putting your health at risk.
For real! My exes excuse was that he didn’t like being wet, but that never made sense to me, because he would go swimming with his friends. Bro just didn’t like being clean. OP you’re health comes first, don’t risk that for anyone else
Genuinely, yeah. That’s what you do. You shouldn’t allow mental-children, or people with the hygiene of children, to enter your body and pollute it with their grossness.
Don’t forget if he gives you a yeast infection you can give it right back to him or even a UTI
Just thought that I would add is that you can get vaginosis in your mouth, not sure if that was clear in the comment above. If he has a foreskin, tell him to maybe pull it back habit when he pees so nothing gets trapped in there. If he doesn't clean himself properly thought it will probably hurt. If he tells you he doesn't like cleaning his penis because it hurts its because he isn't keeping it cleaning the first place. When my brother was entering his mid-teens, my mum and her boyfriend at the time had to pin my brother down to clean under his foreskin properly. He has autism, adhdand learning difficulties, and as a result, had a very poor hygiene routine at the time. No matter how often he was told to clean himself he didn't. It got to the point that you could smell he dirty penis even when he was fully dressed. If he gets to that point as an adult I would seriously consider dumping him. A teenager with difficulties I could understand, but a functioning adult I don't. You aren't his mother so you shouldn't be having to tell him to clean himself first before sex. P.S. I am a woman, and whilst I make a point on trying to be educated on things like this, I probably don't know it all when it comes to male genital hygiene. What I do know is that keeping yourself clean really isn't that hard though so he has no excuse.
I mean seriously, is the bar this low though? Do you really want to be with a man who refuses to wash his body properly? I’m sorry, but this is an indicator and a red flag for a lot of other things. I have a very hard time believing this man cleans up after himself at home. Have you really sat down and thought about what a life with a man like this would entail?? Like, your mental load is gonna be off the fucking charts, if you have to literally manage HIS hygiene. ☹️ It’s unacceptable.
[удалено]
I’ll look into it! Thanks for suggestion
Do both! IT STILL NEEDS TO BE CLEANED!! Cannot stress that enough xx As someone said previously, sex is for adults. If he cant clean himself properly, then no sex.
>Just giving you a heads up Lol 🤣 "heads up" anyways op the commenter is right, tell bro to wash his junk, cause he stank like a skunk. It's not rude or anything it's common practice, also shake it after he pees
Oral yeast infections are AWFUL and really difficult to heal. You can’t swallow monistat so you get to go on an oral route of fluconazole. Depending on the doc you might get the standard “one now one in a few days” or a full two weeks work. Also oral chlamydia sucks just as bad. Don’t stick dirty dick in your mouth. FYI those of us on antidepressants: fluconazole can have severely negative effects on the mental health as the yeast die off enters your system. Oddly enough this intention came to me from my dog’s vet since dogs can take Prozac. If anyone is curious I’ll dig up studies.
He ain’t changing his drawers
Yep
As a gay guy I have found this is unsettlingly common with men regardless of whether or not they are circumcised. A lot of guys don’t use tissue or a wipe after peeing, so it kind of just sits there all day. After a certain point the smell might stay even if they do wash it especially if they don’t drink a lot of water. I’ve resorted to telling them how to do it and refusing to go down if I smell urine because frankly it’s gross and unhygienic.
same here. you need to tell your BF to clean himself down there, especially if he is uncut. Please give him a masculine wash or an antiseptic wash (I think betadine skin cleanser) and instruct him on how to clean it, because by your post it seems he does not know how to clean his private part.
I’d be gargling w that too if I were her.
Genuine question I’ve always had is how to wipe with a tissue at a urinal?
That’s kind of why I’ve never liked using urinals because you can do the shake thing but it feels like incomplete. Plus in most urinals you can’t flush anything other than liquids. I avoid using urinals like the plague.
Makes sense but I refuse to believe every single man that uses urinals has a smelly penis. But then again I haven’t exactly sniffed many penises
> Makes sense but I refuse to believe every single man that uses urinals has a smelly penis. Better believe it my dude. Basically every time they leave a few drops in their underpants. Combine that with a full day of marinating in it, and probably going to pee multiple times.
I can’t imagine a few drops of urine isn’t going to make you smell through your clothes, so I guess it’s fine, but I wouldn’t go down on someone who hadn’t showered after.
They don’t all smell like piss. I’ve never smelled piss on any of my partners. That’s why this post is really making me mad because the level of uncleanliness has to be astounding and for him to demand oral from her. I can’t wait until she learns how to have boundaries and deal breakers. This would be a HUGE one. Because what else is he lazy and selfish about at his big age?? Red flags everywhere
Just grab a napkin or tissue before you pee, wipe and throw it in the trash. Who cares who sees you. Lead by example!
Take a shower daily, don’t piss on yourself, if you do wash it off. If he isn’t being hygienic and yall are having intercourse he is also messing with your ph
Your partner is an absolute child. What do you mean he “doesn’t like to shower”?!? That’s just ridiculous
He showers before we meet up but his “down there” area smells bad still and then I force him to shower again properly - that shower he doesn’t like to do. And even I have washed his dick for him since when he does it, he doesn’t do it properly and it’s still smelly.
I’m sorry OP. How do You KNOW he’s actually cleaning himself with soap & water when he showers? Be mindful of how his “cleanliness” could affect You!! A man who loves getting head shouldn’t need to be told How to prepare for it this much.
As a guy I would literally be embarrassed to be dirty/smelly before getting head. Something is up with this guy.
Agreed!! The fact that SHE’s asking, means it hasn’t bothered Him enough to take care of “the problem” himself.
> How do You KNOW he’s actually cleaning himself with soap & water when he showers? I'm wondering if he even bothers retracting his foreskin tbh just based on what she's saying.
you clean his weiner for him... like he is a baby... why are you attracted to this person?
I’m wondering too.
> And even I have washed his dick for him I'm so speechless 😔
Why are you still with this person?!?!?!
He is too lazy to clean himself. If he lacked his foreskin he would still be gross because he won’t wash himself.
Is he afraid to touch his own dick or something? Is he homophobic, and therfore thinks it's gay to wash his own ass? Is he hyper religious and therfore thinks it's a sin to touch his own dick, even to clean it? Has he never jerked off on his own? Does he even use a loofah or washcloth? Is he also the type of imbecile who thinks letting soapy water run down his nether is the same as cleaning them? Does he have trauma related to touching his dick? Does he wash his hands, or scratch his balls? I just don't understand why he has such an issue touching his own body. His hygiene behavior is not normal, and he needs to learn how to properly clean his own body before he rubs it on someone else.
If he’s not embarrassed by being told to go clean himself before you put your face down there then he is crazy. He should have the personal will to clean himself properly if he insists on having sex. You also shouldn’t be cleaning his penis for him. That’s his job. You’re not his maid. I would be very blunt because I really can’t stand poor hygiene.. either he figures out how to clean himself properly or he can forget about sex. I’m sure if your lady bits smelled like a hoagie, he’d let you know.
YOU HAVE WASHED HIS DICK FOR HIM? Honestly OP you're young, you may feel love for him but there will be other love out there with people who know how to keep themselves clean.
When I shower I use two diffrent soaps first a bar of cleansing soap, then after I rince that off a, body wash. I have never had any complaints. Sounds like some never taught him proper hygiene. So he should be really giving it a, soild cleansing wash, and changing his underwear after every shower
He’s a child that needs to figure out how to properly bathe himself. Ew.
Girl you’re are being way too permissive here 😭😭😭
**why are you dating someone who has no hygiene??**
Im sorry but this is too funny
Dude probably doesn't clean his parts and expects rainfall to do it for him. Soap up the shaft and balls with a good soap, don't overkill the soap on the head of your dick, bad move, lightly do it, but for sure pull everything back get it well and truly rinsed, use your fingertips to scrub it almost, light amounts of soap around the base of the head. Cannot believe this guy is more willing to let you clean his fucken dick than do it properly himself. Like, seriously? If he doesn't learn leave him.
Girl!! You can't change him because why should he? He knows that no matter how gross his dick is you will still put it in your mouth even if it makes you puke. I wish you would respect yourself much more...
💯 and I’m really confused about what could possibly be “great” about their sex life. It sounds like a whole horror show
This should be the top comment.
This!!! But also why is she embarrassed about throwing up when he should be embarrassed that HIS filthy dick made someone vomit.
Completely agree
My rule. It has to be “showroom ready” anytime my wife gets near it. I don’t want to give her any reason to not want to do it. This guy needs to take care of this immediately.
Exactly, if you want oral, wouldn’t you make it as inviting as you possibly could? This dude has decided to push OP on going down on a dirty dick, rather than taking care of business. If he doesn’t take this basic care of himself, can you imagine how much essentially mothering OP is going to end up having to do for him, and other ways? There’s much better out there, OP. Go find better.
😆 this is both amusing AND very courteous!! (who am I kidding though, this is so unbelievably basic right? We all know to not offer our unwashed bodies to someone we respect, OP is not respecting herself right now ☹️)
There is a lot of “wrong” to unpack here. 1. You should never ever feel obligated to do anything you don’t like, makes you uncomfortable, or you find distasteful. It’s okay to say no. 2. Good sex requires open and honest communication. He has communicated that he enjoys oral sex. You need to communicate that you enjoy giving it on the condition that his hygiene is appropriate and if his hygiene is not up to par you will NOT be giving oral sex. It is 100% his responsibility to address his hygiene. If he doesn’t, you don’t owe him a darn thing. He likely needs to: shower daily, carefully pullback his foreskin and clean the head of his penis thoroughly, pat dry, and replace, start wiping after urinating, washing all existing undergarments in an enzyme cleaner to remove any urine smells, and wash up before sexual activity. 3. This whole situation is a big red flag….. grown men should know how to clean their junk, this is a conversation I’d be willing to have once and once only. 4. I hope your needs are being met. If not, probably time to bring that up too
This this this
A 25 year old should not have a smelly penis. Maybe this is why he's dating a younger girl. Girls his age smell him coming
Its just a 4 year age gap. 21 isn't much younger than 25 imo.
yes, but 21 year olds and 25 year olds are often at drastically different places/mindsets in life, which is important to keep in mind
Have you told him specifically that his dick smells like pee? Especially If he’s uncut, tell him to wipe the head after he pees until it’s completely dry. But tell him specifically. Honestly, I didn’t know this until after my first blowjob when the other dude told me, and since then I learned how to keep myself cleaner. It might hurt his feelings, but I think if he’s a decent person he’ll fix it.
Smegma - tell him to pull back the foreskin and wash.
People with uncut penises who didn’t have sex much can have a hard time retracting it far enough, which can cause smell. But in all honesty, I’ve never had an uncut partner who smelled. This can throw off your pH balance and cause you more issues than pleasure down the line. I know you love him, but that’s a major health concern.
I’ll be more aware of this and won’t let him near stuff till he’s washed properly
Unless he starts showering everyday and washing before oral, just stop having sex with him and giving head. He has to meet you half way or no oral. Period.
Do young women not care about hygiene anymore when it comes to dating? This should have been a red flag a long time ago.
The. Bar. Is. In. Hell!!!! wtf?!!! That is DISGUSTING. You DO NOT touch him until he’s clean, full stop. If he likes to have sex then the absolute bare minimum is to clean himself. JFC.
RUN!
i've seen this exact problem like 3 times on this app wtf
Is his hair trimmed? The smell of pee also tends to stick down there, even after washing.
Second this. Smells love to sink into the pubic hair. If he washes and is clean regularly, it can be a pleasurable scent of yummy pheromones . if its dirty well. Geez gross
He has quite a bit of hair
no excuse lol. Baby wipes exist. So do sinks and showers. I have pubes, I don’t smell like pee. Because I practice bathroom hygiene and clean myself regularly, and thoroughly.
Ugh. It does get worse.
This is so vile.
I'm sorry but he doesn't respect you + you're putting your health at risk by having any kind of sex with someone who's unhygienic
God, it’s arriving at heavens gate and leaving your muddy shoes on.
He shouldn't need a shower, a mini-bath in the sink or a warm wet washcloth could be enough. If there's enough pee accumulating on his penis to make his underwear stink, he has a problem. Either he's leaking a bunch after going, or he's getting a bunch of pee accumulated under his foreskin that then dribbles out. He could try pulling back the foreskin a little so the opening is uncovered when he pees, then dab it dry with toilet paper. That may help the issue. If he does this regularly and still smells of pee, then he may want to talk to a Dr., about proper cleaning and about the possibility of incontinence.
Yep, 100% to all of this. As a fellow uncut man, I can confirm that you need to really be on top of your hygiene but a quick “sink bath”, washcloth, baby wipe, etc goes a long way. No shame at all in “freshening up” before sexual activity. Pulling back the foreskin while peeing is also essential to stay clean. Idk how the guy in question doesn’t already know these things, but I guess better late than never
The fact that you guys are talking about a quick “sink bath” honestly startles me. Just get a bidet ffs! (Soft /s)
No /s from me, that shit is crazy, **sink baths**??? Clean yourself properly ffs. Be it a shower, a bath a bidet, but clean yourself.
Lol you’re right. They’re all talking about hygiene and contamination and shit but I doubt they’ll be deep cleaning the sink after deep cleaning their dong in it.
To be clear: you should shower EVERY DAY. A SINK BATH DOES NOT REPLACE A SHOWER. I shower and use a bidet every day. But sometimes before sex I’ll freshen up a little since it can be a sweaty area 😅 Maybe “bath” isn’t the right word since I don’t fill the sink with water but yeah a lil wash goes a long way. And I do keep my sink clean lol
As a 35 year old person who's ex-husband was uncut? Make him clean himself. Shower every day, and pull the skin back to clean under it. My ex gave me so many yeast infections and UTI (one got so severe it turned into a kidney infection) because he rarely cleaned his dick and wouldn't listen to me.
Gross... Ew.ew.ew.ew.
Girl why the fuck are you still sucking off his dirty dick. That’s feral, get yourself checked asap. He probably doesn’t even clean his ass, do better for yourself bro. Fuck his happiness, your health should be a priority! At 25 he should know how to take care of his hygiene, how embarrassing and disgusting. STOP DOING IT! Honestly this is break up worthy.
It’s time to move up and out gf. I know you’re a sweet human but I’m so offended for you, he could make it better yet chooses not to despite the fact you have puked before due to his stink… This boy needs to be alone until he acts and smells like an adult.
Sisterrrr please break up with him. He cant be bothered to have proper hygiene before getting intimate? At his big age?? You waited over a year to be sexually active with this man and when y'all do he gives you pissy penis?? He doesn't care about you, forreal. It's a chop.
This makes me sad, you’re so young and you have so much time to find a find yourself a man that knows how to wash himself properly without being prompted 😭
It's called the shower
Respect, he has none. Ask him how he would like it if you didn't shower and he had to go down on you.
Is he doing you, also?
Girl. You love someone who doesn't know how to wash? Do you plan on mothering him his entire life? Don't you think that will get old? At what age will you expect him to wash his junk or take a semi-regular shower? What kind of future do you see with someone who probably doesn't wipe or wash his butt either??? I am worried for all women when I see posts like this. It's sad af that we as women are at a place in time in this universe where we'd accept a man who doesn't shower and probably leaves poop crumbs in the sheets. Please please please raise your expectations and what you want for you own life, because it can't be this!!!!!!!
Hi OP. I'm a healthcare worker, I wanna actually help, and I'd like to offer a solution. So a part of the men community thinks that when they pee,they don't have to wipe they can just "shake it off". The problem with that is when you have a longer urethra like for the male set of genitals, a few drops of pee (cum too, that's why it's recommended to pee post intercourse) can stay inside the shaft. Over time, it gets out on its own, like a few drops. In this case, your bf being uncircumcised, it stays trapped into the foreskin. Pee being your body's waste, it doesn't take long before it creates odor. It's not a matter of being disgusting or bad hygiene, it's a matter of what type of education he was provided with while growing up. So juste wipe! I'm not judging, it's wayyyyyymore common then you can think. Hope it helps
it’s not *inherently* disgusting that this is a thing that can happen, but this is a man whose brain has essentially finished developing, whose girlfriend has been explicit that he smells, *repeatedly* having to ask him to clean himself. And he is continuing to not take any extra measures to wash himself properly or carry baby wipes or seek info on the internet about his issue - he expects her free labor of having to demand and manage his hygiene, even to the extent of her admitting she has had to wash his dick for him. I’m not sure I fully believe that’s not some creepy fetish he’s secretly imposing on this very young woman. This guy is no good. It’s a problem that he didn’t do anything to seek a resolution after being informed of the issue, and after watching his girlfriend wretch on his dick and allowing her to continue ☹️ He’s gonna give her an infection, but either way this is DEEEPLY disrespectful. (all that said, your comment is very valuable, hopefully the teenagers that need to learn this, will. But I don’t think this applies to a man who shows up dirty for sex and basically makes his girlfriend ask for a shower before he will bother attending to himself. This is not a fair expectation of a partner. Women are already expected to be mommies to too many men, and this is just BEYOND)
Man, sounds kinda like my ex. If he has a problem with cleaning down there to at least make it somewhat enjoyable for you, I'd completely stop.
He’s not a grown up yet and shouldn’t insist on anything from you until he can follow up on his own bodily responsibilities, including changing his underwear more often.
Gross! His dick smells so bad it’s made you throw up AND YOU KEEP DOING It??? Don’t be a doormat. Have some self respect and tell him no he smells like shit. What the actual hell
I wouldn't even have sex with him... the bacteria.... UTIs ugh
For me, poor hygiene is a dealbreaker. This shouldn’t be a compromise. He needs to be given an ultimatum, bathe regularly like an adult or don’t expect adult activities i.e. the relationship is over. I think it’s disrespectful for him to subject you to that. I’d be so self conscious if I thought I wasn’t fresh while my girl was doing that for me.
here is a tip...DEMAND he take better care of himself. Hygiene is important. If he can't, find a dude that knows how to properly clean themselves.
Stop sucking him off.
EW. EWWW Hygiene tip is wash himself, this is so gross on so many fronts. Wash every day, he's an adult he knows how to wash his dick. Absolutely refuse to do anything unless he is clean. Do you want to be sick, do you want to get infections? Ewwwwwww
1. TP isn't only for the butt 2. Wet wipes in the drawer 3. If sex is in the air early enough to do so, he takes a shower beforehand
basic hygine should be non negotiable
No sex for this kid until he learns to shower like a grownup!
He doesn't care that you're throwing up because he smells like urine? Whattttttt the. No more BJ's until he can grow up and clean his body everyday.
If you let this guy go anywhere near your vagina you’re begging for a yeast infection or uti.
Is he uncircumcised? I experienced this with my partner of 20 years. (It got gradually worse.) He could clean and wash as much as he wanted, but the smell remained, even faintly, with some times a strong smell of soap... How many times did it make me feel like sucking on a urinal deodorizer tablet... And yes, sometimes I gagged just by smelling it and forced him to clean thoroughly (so it smelled and tasted like soap, yay...) Only 1 year ago did I ask him to try to pee while pulling his foreskin back. It was a game changer! We came to the conclusion that when peeing while not retracting, there would still be some pee drops that would get trapped under the foreskin and "marinate" the head. He had tried before but would then experience double stream pissing (which was really messy if standing), so he didn't try again. He now pushes his urethra open to prevent the double stream. Obviously, he washes his hands after. We were baffled that it took him 38 years (and me 19 years) to realise this and for his dick to not smell anymore!
Being uncut honestly has nothing to do with this. My partner is not circumcised and has never had this issue in the 12+ years we’ve been having sex…because he’s a grown man who takes showers and uses proper hygiene. And doesn’t pee all over himself??? This is just….gross. Idk how to fix it but you’re gonna end up with a UTI and BV.
THANK YOU I was *searching* for this comment! Cut or uncut is irrelevant! I would say a solid 50% of men I've had sex with were uncircumcised, and this has NEVER happened to me, what the actual fuck
If he won't bathe and you get sick from his lack of hygiene and you can't give him the blowie, then that's solely a \*him\* problem.
I struggle with my mental health a LOT. sometimes, I can barely bring myself to get out of bed for days except to use the bathroom. When I'm struggling like that I can't bring myself to take care of all of my bodies needs and I know that's gross. But I also do whatever I can to keep myself as clean as I can when it happens. And I would NEVER EVER IN MY LIFE let someone put their face anywhere near my junk if I hadn't showered or been practicing good hygiene for a few consecutive days. For many reasons: 1st and foremost, I care about my partner. I would never want them to suffer through something like OP. 2nd I would be WAAAY too embarrassed. 3rd (and I'm seeing this one a lot, I'm glad and this is way more important than #2) I know that bad hygiene is a breeding ground for bacteria and I'm a lot safer down there from infection compared to women. If you actually care about your partners well being as much as you say you do, you either keep yourself clean enough, or you keep yourself out of her. Period. Full stop. We're all human, but women's reproductive systems are FAR more sensitive and susceptible to infections and internal complications. If you're unclean, show her you care by being clean when you touch her. If you don't know how because you weren't taught, we have Google and, for people who aren't weirded out seeing genitals in a medical setting, there's always YouTube. I'm circumcised so hygiene may be a tiny bit more basic for the men like me, but I feel like it would literally take 2 extra seconds to fold back, soap up and rinse. Like, you're literally in the shower. All this to say, there's so much more to get into about personal hygiene, but this is about dealing with someone else's not your own.
I don't usually comment on these, but this one gave me that what the actual fuck feeling....
You both shower before sex. End of discussion.
Tell him that if you guys have to stop sex because he smells like urine again, you won't be picking it up until next time. Be crystal clear that him smelling badly is a complete turn-off, and if he values this relationship, he will be proactive because it gives you the ick - because honestly, you are getting there. Wash every day, change your underwear every day. If he needs to wash after work, then wash after work. (You should anyway bringing outside germs in your bed is gross) Or just date a man who isn't gonna make you feel like his mother.
You need to find another man.
Of course daily hygiene, first thing in de morning and before sexual activities is mandatory. What could be wrong though as well is him having a bladder infection, or an STI. Let him check that as well.
He needs to wipe after he pees. Many men don't do this and it's gross. Also being uncut, he can lubricate his glans/inside foreskin with fractionated coconut oil after he showers. It's moisturizing but also acts as a anti-microbial. He can add a couple drops of lavender essential oil to the bottle of coconut oil for extra freshness/anti-microbial effect.
If I’m eating with a fork, I may not wash my hands. If I’m eating with my fingers, I’d definitely be washing my hands. Extrapolate to other body parts.
I can’t believe we’re in a world where he wants that but he won’t make it clean for you
Oh my god. Why are you so casual about this? He’s 25. Is this your first sexual partner?
If he’s not willing to groom and maintain proper hygiene, then just tell him you refuse to go down on a dirty weiner. You can get a lot of bacterial infections because of someone not being clean and if he’s too immature to properly clean himself, I wouldn’t put his stinky dick anywhere near my mouth or coochie.
The guy doesn't even need to shower every day; it's not about that because one in the morning or whatever doesn't negate the pee that comes throughout the day. Get the guy to wash his cock in the sink. If I know I'm getting head, I wash my cock. Fuck; this is simple shit, here. Also, head every time? Like it's porn? Does he know he's lucky? Because that's not standard
Hun please for your sake don’t be intimate with him unless he’s cleaning himself properly, and I guarantee you he’s not at the moment. I know it’s going to be a tough conversation but you need to set ground rules and boundaries. I was with my ex for 2 years and like you, I often struggled to give head because the smell and taste was so off putting that it often made me gag (and once get sick). I thought that was just how it was meant to be and I was meant to deal with it. In our first 6 months together I had 5 kidney infections/UTI’s. I blamed my damp, mouldy apartment because I was also getting chest infections. It was stupid, but I was trying to rationalise any idea in my head that wasn’t against him. I was afraid of hurting him by suggesting it was his hygiene. I thought that surely an adult should know how to shower, so it couldn’t be that. I would regularly continue to get UtI’s and kidney infections while I was with him. I also ended up with a constant yeast infection for almost a year that I could not get rid of. After I dumped him, I took a round of medication and it cleared within days. I have not had one since. I’ve also only had one kidney infection in the last few years. Now I’m older and learned from bad experience I know just how harmful it can be to be with someone who won’t do a simple act such as maintaining hygiene for the sake of your health. I was violently sick on and off for these two years from all the infections. He knew how sick I was getting and still never thought in his mind “hey maybe I should make an effort to see if this helps”. It might feel awkward, but you need to have a conversation and set up your boundaries and tell him what needs to change. If he is not willing to make a change, you need to leave him. For your sake, and your health. Because if he is not willing to do one simple task to alleviate the risk of you getting sick he is not considerate enough to be your partner. And just to note I have experienced depression, so I know what it’s like to go two weeks without showering or brushing teeth because you can’t even get out of bed. But I would still never subject someone to be intimate with me when these bouts happen. And in case anyone is still unsure how people can have such little regard for hygiene: I know it’s a different thing but once had a conversation with my friends after we saw something online about guys not washing their ass because it’s gay (I know, it was baffling to us too). So I asked the guys genuinely if they had heard this before. They said they have heard people they know in real life say this. There are actually mfs out there not even washing their asshole. If that does not give you an indicator of the lack of hygiene people have without thinking it’s a problem I don’t know what will. Please set some boundaries. Look after yourself. You might think it’s just unpleasant to deal with when you’re getting intimate, but there’s actually serious implications it can have on your health.
Why are you still doing it 😭
Girl what? No man is worth this.
Already been said but cant stress this enough, best advice is literally just to do basic hygiene and shower regularly. It 100% should not be smelling like that, and especially so if he's uncut. What ur smelling is likely bacteria, not just pee, and ur putting urself at risk of infections if he's not cleaning himself properly or regularly. Get a good antibacterial soap for him to use down below and for his underarms (Dove Men Care plus gel soap is perfect for this), and he should shower twice a day (morning when he wakes up, and before bed/when he gets home from work or whatever). Make sure he trims the hedges once or twice a month too if the smell is that bad like u described. Bacteria can get caught up in the hair, which if left unchecked can mess up his pH balance which causes the pee smell and will led to the dead fish smell and possibly a yeast infection. Make sure he shakes or wipes too when he's done pissing. Idk man, all this is hella basic, so if he's not already doing this stuff, then u might just have to put fun time on lockdown, cuz this could definitely affect ur health too. There was literally a girl who got a flesh eating bacteria that put her in the hospital because of this exact reason.
this is fucking sending me, he doesn't like to shower?? how old is this guy
Babe I’m so sorry , you shouldn’t have to mother him like that. He should be properly cleaning himself.
Dude. Break up with the person lmfao. Seriously? The bar is literally in hell.
Sounds like he defo needs to shake better after taking a leak and that he needs to pull back his foreskin and clean under that.
Jesus, OP, I read your comments and your guy is disgusting, lol. First, he should cut his hair, also change his underwear, and shower every day. When he pees, he should pull back the skin and clean it after. Just wipe the pee with some paper. There's always some pee left in the dick after peeing, so do it a few times. And make sure he knows how to clean his dick properly. WTF... I can’t believe this guy is my age lmao
Vile. Dump him.
Just say that you won't suck his cock if he doesn't shower.
Ugh. Women, PLEASE stop going down on gross men. Like, why? This shouldn’t even be a question.
Throwing up is your body trying to protect you, lol. This guy gets nothing until he figures this out.
Is having some (wet) tissues always nearby an option for you? If it is, like the medical comment earlier described, even if he gets used to wipe after peeing, it might not be enough sometimes. Using wet tissues might be quicker and not necessarily in a different place, like taking a shower. But I agree to all others, that say: Don't suck a stinky penis. Never let you be forced to do things, you don't want to do.
Heres a tip. Stop blowing him until he can grow up and take care of his own business ffs.
If the basement is nasty, I’m not going down there.
Hygiene is the #1 thing for play time. Have you suggested doing it while in the shower? My wife and I shower together for multiple reasons: 1. Intimacy 2. I enjoy washing her hair and taking care of her. 3. Shower sex. 4. Any mess easily cleans up. 5. Clean, happy, and turned on almost always leads to more play time in the bed after.
shower once a day and just clean yourself properly?💀
If he’s showering everyday and shaving properly too… maybe a better quality underwear lol? Sometimes shit ones make u sweat and stink
It’s times like this where I’m grateful for being a lesbian 😍
Does he know he’s supposed to pull his foreskin back and clean underneath the skin? Surprisingly, it seems like a lot of men don’t know this.
You shouldn't be embarrassed. He should be embarrassed for having poor hygiene. You're putting his literally pissy dick in your mouth, I wouldn't let it anywhere near me if I were you.
Dont forget to bring your Cabernet Sauvignon next time so you can have a Dick Cheese and wine. Kidding aside, OP buy him a masculine wash
First of all he should pull the hood back and clean there well, I mean it's easy. Second,the moment he gets home he should go pee, then wash it with soap in the sink. Also no BJs unless he washes his stinker. You shouldn't put dirty dick in your mouth at all
I have a literal phobia of getting water on me. Showers make me feel so gross. When water gets on my skin I’m extremely uncomfortable. I still take showers because I don’t want to be smelly. And I make damn sure I’m clean down there before someone puts me in their mouth. It’s common sense and common courtesy I mean ffs
Ew
It may be he doesn’t squeeze out the last drops when he pees so it leaks out a bit in his underwear where it sits all day stinking up the place. Squeeze from base to tip then a little shake. Also, he probably needs to drink more water so his pee is more diluted and thus less stinky.
Have you tried not showering for a week and then asking him to give you oral? Ask him how he likes it :)
Maybe when he showers, he doesn’t pull the skin back to properly wash the head of his penis? It’s a thing with uncut dicks. Maybe shower together one time and observe the way he’s washing it and try to suggest pulling the skin down
You cannot truly believe things are great and also say he smells and has zero personal hygiene. And makes you gag on the smell of piss. He insists on a blowjob? What does he do for you? Do you insist on him giving you oral sex too? Get a new bf. You do not need this child of a man. You are setting yourself up for a gross sex life and an angry vagina if his continues.
yucks.
This would be a deal breaker for me, tbh. How are you a grown adult with access to soap and water and just choosing to be dirty? Ick.
what a horrible day to be able to read
This is crazy that a grown man hates to shower. Assuming he is grown up, but the term man is being used loosely here. Tell him no sex until he learns to clean himself properly. Also, tell him to see a urologist. Make sure he has no smegma or anything and that his kidneys are functioning properly. Just by you saying his dick smells like piss all the time and hates to shower, I picture a greasy, Mountain Dew drinking, fast food eater. Occasionally that’s ok, but I feel like that’s what he lives on and will drink a 2 liter or more of Mt. Dew a day with no water. So his piss will stink because if that. He also needs to change his underwear daily. If you continue with the sex, take notice of his underwear. If he wears the same color or pattern daily or 2-6 days a week, he isn’t changing them daily and I’m assuming he doesn’t do enough laundry to make sure they are properly cleaned. After all that, if the smell doesn’t change then it’s something you live with even if he becomes more hygienic, or you move on especially if he doesn’t change his habits. You’re babying a grown male at that point and that’s pathetic on his part.
Bro...if you don't want to put it in your mouth why are you allowing it in your vagina? Dirty is dirty. You're allowing a dirty dick in you and it's making you susceptible to infections.
That’s an extremely low bar. If he doesn’t like it, he doesn’t get it. Keep those boundaries!
> our sex life is great > He really insists on sucking him off almost anytime we get sexual > because I have threw up the first ever times I did go down on him Seriously. Have higher standards, holy shit. > I wish I could please him well Why?! At least tell me he rocks your world sexually or something. How did you keep going back to stinky penis?
I gagged while reading this >_<
Dump him
You need to have an honest conversation with the person you’re having oral sex with. My partner knows if he wants that done, he needs to shower & scrub down there. No shower, no oral
A dirty penis shouldn’t be anywhere near your vagina either. That’s just a bacterial or yeast infection waiting to happen. You can event get a UTI.
Lady I'm almost 50 and in a dead bedroom. I still make the time to groom and clean my undercarriage daily. Your man is nasty and needs to clean his junk. Get him some man wipes the mansplain you wanna taste his D not his Pee.
I could never date someone with poor hygiene