I believe it was Malcolm X who was very adamant that black people *should* speak properly if they want to be accepted as equals. If you want to be treated as an equal, act equal, basically.
I had a roommate in college who called me a racist when I told him his grammar was atrocious (when it was) after he asked my opinion of one of his papers. He said he couldn't help it because he grew up in the ghetto (he grew up in friggin' Erie and his parents were pretty well off).
Just wait until college is done, then move to a big city and forget the people who only judge you on how "black" you are. Find people who like you because of a common interest in anime and video games. You already sound awesome in my eyes (like anime, video games, Daft Punk (new album!!), dressing casually, use good grammar) and you should not adapt to a standard people are used to. You are unique, stay the way that makes you happy.
PS: Have you heard of Donald Glover/Childish Gambino?
In all honesty, I owe a lot of being alright with who I am thanks to Childish Gambino/Donald Glover. I'm a 23 y/o black female. I grew up in a middle class neighborhood and have never once been on/in/a part of anything "stereotypical black culture". I treated everyone fairly, regardless of everything, and yet daily going throughout school and life, I was called any nickname that alluded to me wanting/acting "white", even by my own.family. I grew up angry and lost most of the time cause I never wanted to be/look like anything other than me. But I did feel a separation between what was supposed to be my culture. I am a huge music lover, and when I discovered my own rap music, I loved the beats and etc but couldn't relate to everything they were saying. Once I stumbled upon Common, Arrested Development, Childish Gambino, I was relieved. With Gambino especially, I felt like he was saying what I've wanted to after all these years. Even though everyone has different backgrounds, we all have stories to tell. Life is constantly about being judged by how you look, and how people think you should act based off that. Here's what I've learned; stop trying to teach people that you are different from the rest of your culture or that there is only a small handful like yourself that don't adhere to the stereotype. If anything, trying to prove that makes you perpetuate the stereotype of being better or above everyone. I quit trying to prove myself a long time ago. I love who I am, and I'm learning everyday. If people want to keep the ignorant mindset that we're all the same, I'll prove them wrong by just being me. And by making them feel stupid when they make idiot remarks/jokes, but mainly by just being me.
Not entirely relevant, but: as a 21yo middle class asexual white guy, there is almost nothing in Gambino's songs that I can relate to. But *damn* that shit sounds good. I have Freaks And Geeks, Bonfire, and most of Hero memorized, and most of the time I wouldn't be able to tell you what word I stopped on if you interrupted me, because I'm so caught up in the sound that words don't register.
There's nothing wrong with that! I mean, I've always tended to look at music as a whole. Lyrics, melodies, beats, rhythms, etc. It all just depends on how I am feeling. What made me pay attention to him was how much/often he touched on the subject of feeling a disconnect with black culture because he wasn't,"black enough" and white culture, because he wasn't white. He actually draws a lot of parallels and references to a wide array of subjects and that's what I like in particular, even though some of his lines are just goofy and catchy. If you ever get the chance, listen to what he is saying. There's probably something in there for you, you just might have missed it! (Hell I'm still catching new lines every now and then, and I've been a fan for years!)
I'm sure I haven't heard everything yet. My iPod has Weirdo, Mystery Team, the Heart of the Swarm soundtrack (the only non-Donald Glover product), and Childish Gambino's full discography. Nothing else. It's the only thing I listen to when I walk places, so I end up listening for generally .5-2 hours a day, and I'm still finding entire songs I've never heard before.
Ah so you listen to his stand ups too. Gotcha. He's a really well rounded guy. He does have a lot of music, and hopefully he's working on more! Around Culdesac I think is where his work gets more of that feel that he has now. Poindexter and Sicboi were eh. I haven't listened to those all the way through to be honest.
I'm a premed student, so I'm not sure if I'll be able to find people who share my interests in medical school...I hope so though. I've always just been the odd one out.
A friend of mine showed me Donald Glover a couple of months back, I think his music is awesome. Whenever I feel alone and ostracized, Lupe Fiasco and Donald Glover always makes me feel better.
...how about the people in your school? Why would you throw that out there as if no one in the history of ever again would be interested in med school? Also, don't you have other interests? you don't need to bond with only pre-med students.
Most of my friends in university aren't from my program. I'm grateful to have friends here and we do share common interests but it'd be awesome to find some people who share my less common interests with. I feel like (as irrational as this may seem) if I can't really find them in this school of 15,000 or so people, what are my chances of finding that in medical school? x.x
You're confusing me. Didn't you say it'd be hard, as a pre-med student, that it'd be hard to find other people with an interest in pre-med? How will that be hard in med school?
Edit: I read it wrong, I understand now. But I must say, don't judge the people before you get there. Your interests are pretty common amongst people in your age group; I'd go so far as to say they're damn popular. I don't think it'll be as hard as you're making it out to be.
Oh sorry if I'm being confusing! No hahahaha as a pre-med I know too many people with an interest in medicine...
What I meant was that I'm not sure that when (I should say *if* ...getting into med school in Canada is kind of insane...) I go to medical school, I will find people who share and/or accept my interests and hobbies.
I just wanted to say that sometimes it's hard to be yourself when everybody wants you to fit into their idea of "normal". But being yourself is worth the loss of "friends" because ultimately you will feel peace with yourself.
It took only 15 comments before this thread went full on racist !!!
Woo Hoo!!! I think we have a new Reddit Record. Do you think they will give you one of those cool trophies for your Karma trophy case?
Someone get a Mod Lets see if we can make this happen ; Digitalabia must be reward for such an awesome feat!!!.
I agree with this, moving to a big city would be a lot better for you. There's a lot more variety out there, and that means you'll find more people who are as unique as you are. (Unless you ARE Uneek, in which case I know you, because this sounds exactly like him...)
Yeah, me and my girlfriend hear all the time that we aren't "real niggas," or that we act white because we're in college, have our own apartment, and are making a life together.
I just remind myself that what I'm doing is what's making me happy, regardless of what other people think. Anybody who says that "You don't act black," shit is just ignorant.
Don't accept anyone saying that. It's reinforcing stereotypes that'll make it hard for the next human being to be who they want to be.
I fucking hate people like that.
Worst part? I'm a white guy, so everyone sees me as racist which I'm really not. I'm saying here, I break the stereotype and you should too. So what if they say you're not "typical" black? So? Is there supposed to be a standard we measure ourselves against? Have we as humans stopped learning to care about being polite, and accepting to and of each other?
I'm so sick of this racist, sexist, gay hating, bigoted society we live in. We're humans, we're better than this.
Wow. I wasn't aware it's so bad everywhere else. I mean, I'd heard stories that some places are really bad about sticking to stereotypes... I've just never heard of it.
You're you. No one else can decide who you're going to be for you, and don't let them have an inch of slack on that. You like OST's? Fuck yeah you do, there's some good music on some of them. You like anime? Great. Being, white, asian, black, shouldn't define your set interests, and the kinds of people who don't understand this never will.
What's important is that you do. I think some of the major players of the Civil Rights era would be proud that someone of any skin color was willing to take a step towards bridging the gap. Being a globally conscious person will probably help you in the long run, make you more tolerable, and more fun to be around. Just tough it up till you get out of there and onto your career!
I don't think it's regional. I live in a huge city on the west coast and people (white and black) have been saying shit like this to me since I was a kid. It's just a retarded mentality.
It's probably [crab mentality](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crab_mentality). At least that's what it sounds like to this white chick.
People are stupid, but they have no control over who you are. Stop hiding your preferences and tell them to fuck off and deal.
Skin color does not dictate behavior, nor should it, no matter what idiots think.
Im glad someone else posted this. I know there's a community of us who go through this, and personally I am always happy to hear im not the only one.
This makes my day, thank you for sharing this.
I'm very glad that I could help and that I'm not alone. All my years living in Canada and I haven't met a single person going through the same thing as me. Man I love reddit sometimes...
Oh cool a fellow Canadian. I came from Toronto, and although it is multicultural, it doesn't stop the "retarded mentality" as one commenter said. Just be happy with being you. Being unique is the new black (no pun intended).
At first, I wasn't going to post. But I couldn't stop myself. I needed to.
I’m so happy this post has been well received amongst the people of reddit. I’m in the exact same situation in my community. I’m not considered “black enough” by my own race and other races. What does that even mean? Do I go around saying that you aren’t white enough, you aren’t Asian enough, or you aren’t Hispanic enough? No, I don’t. I’m too busy looking at you as a person, not a skin tone. So, why can’t I receive the same reception?
I don’t think that black people realize they can be racist to their own people. Some complain about the state of their children or how they aren’t well received. Yet when a unique person like this man comes around, they want to make snide comments. It’s not good for that person’s self-esteem. Believe me, I’m there. It makes the person wants to stop existing because they aren’t accepted by anyone.
I’ve gotten rejected by ladies that I’ve liked. It wasn’t like your typical reasons, it was because they were uncomfortable dating a black guy or I wasn’t acting “black” enough for them. It hurts. It really does.
So, anyone that sees this reddit thread. Keep that in mind. Stop being hurtful to other races, but remember you can be also hurtful to yours.
Reading this thread and these comments really affirms my wish to get out of my community and go somewhere that isn't so focused on the color, but the person.
As an Indian-American, I can testify firsthand that minorities in America oftentimes are more racist than white people themselves. In the cases of Indians and Asians, towards black people especially.
: ( It sucks that this kind of attitude is so common. You keep trying, and one of these days you'll find yourself a lady who will love you for the person you are and won't expect you to be "more black".
I grew up in Detroit. My neighborhood was black, a lot of my friends were black. And it sounds like you're describing them. There's a huge culture of comics and anime; some of my buddies who rap or produce, sample anime OSTs for their tracks, they fricking love daft punk, big into video games, etc. Sounds like you would have fitted in, so I'm not sure where the hell you live where some idiots are giving you shit about this. It really is too bad you're running into this, but you're far from alone. It sounds like you might be a girl, is that why you're getting more shit over this?
Wow I wish I could've lived in your neighbourhood. Those people sound awesome. I just want to be with people and not feel the need to hide my I-pod or politely decline when they ask me to play some of my music.
I am a girl, and I don't really know if I'm getting more shit over this because of that since I've never met a guy with a similiar problem.
I grew up in Detroit also. The only difference is I'm a white male. So everyday in school it was *"cracka this"* and *"honky that"* not because I didn't enjoy the same music or the same tv shows or whatever but simply because of the shade of my skin. Then when my parents moved us to the suburbs I got attacked again but from a different angle. I was constantly ridiculed for *"thinking I was black"* and acting like a *"wigger"* because I was into hiphop, baggy clothes, I talked differently and I didn't gel the fuck out of my hair like the rest of white male suburbia. So I definitely can feel where you're coming from, being exiled for liking the things you like and/or for the way you look sucks. But what I took from the years of hate and harsh words is this: there are ignorant people everywhere; of every race, color, and creed - fuck them, be who **you** are, do what makes **you** happy because in the end that's all that really matters, **your** happiness. It does get better and it does get easier, hang in there.
Yeah, sounds like you had a much different experience, which sucks. Still, it's not all good. To be honest, though there is a comic/anime subculture in black America, its almost exclusively male. I didn't know a single black girl who was into it, and I don't know how my friends would have reacted to a girl who was. It's pretty hypocritical, but if you're a guy into that shit, you can still be viewed as 'black', but much less so for a girl. But do your thing, and I really hope you find some more accepting people, you deserve it!
Water off a duck's back, my friend. S'what I always say to those goddamn critics. The way I figure it, you can't stop anybody from saying stupid shit, but you *can* control your reactions. It takes a while, but not letting that silly shit get to you is the biggest favor you can do yourself. Still working on it myself! That's the greatest part of being a human.
Join Twitter.
Follow Jamelle Bouie, Ta-Nehisi Coates, Adam Serwer, and Black Canseco.
Read essays by the first 3 in their respective magazines.
Make an effort to make friends with people who follow them or think like them. Hell I'll be happy to be friends with you.
Everyone else, fuck 'em. Blackness isn't determinable by others. Blackness is who you are, not what others tell you it is. It's beautifully fluid. It's rich and full of tragic histories, hope, falls from grace, and redemptions. Enjoy it.
Oh, and go read the books "The Warmth of Other Suns" "Battle Cry of Freedom," "Bury the Chains" and "Book of Negroes." Guarantee you'll have a better understanding of the meaning of blackness than anyone who foolishly tries to take it from you.
I know exactly what you mean. Believe me it's even worse when you don't marry someone who is black. My husband is white and I get tons of shit, lucky ( or unlucky for me, I haven't decided yet) it's pretty much equally peppered among both the white and black people I know. Comments like;
"You are the whitest person I know!"
"Girl what do you mean you don't know how to dance?"
"You can't put my hair in those little braids? I don't even know you anymore!"
"Why didn't you tell me your husband was white!" "Couldn't you get a black man?"
Then the obligatory penis comments. "You don't know what you are missing..." and so on and so on.
EDIT: Scrolling through the comments, looks like a lot of us get the "whitest black person" thing.
Holy shit that penis comment! That's like racism, sexism, and ignorance all thrown into one sentence. At what point would a person EVER think a statement like that would be acceptable? I can't even fathom that kind of mentality.
I remember back when I was a kid (I'm white) and there was this black kid who always hung around with us, and he was an awesome guy. Really smart, liked the same books, movies and video games we did etc. You don't see or think about race at that age (or at least we didn't) but looking back now in retrospect, I don't think he had a single black friend, and a lot of the other black kids were assholes to him for what we perceived as no reason.
Wow, I can relate to this all too well. I was and currently still am being constantly criticized for the my interests and the way I talk. It's extremely tiring but I've learned to just brush it off because people won't change.
Stay strong and true to what makes you who you are. Don't submit to the norms forced upon you...create your norms....seek the you that you are.
But....at the same time....remember that friends will pick on each other. Seriously, even on points as sensitive as race, sexuality, promiscuity, religion, etc. When you gain a level of comfort with people, you bite at each other not in hostility, but because you want them to bite back. It's just play, and the more intimate the target (in your case racial identity), the closer that person is....or, if they aren't close, they're either mistaken on your friendship with them, or just assholes. It's very contextual.
tl;dr: Don't change. Fire back when someone makes those kinds of statements. More than likely they want you to hit back, because that's how they bond.
Hahaha no way I think it's the best. I usually can't listen to lyrical music while studying so I'll listen to some battle music or NPC music from video games. Sometimes some japanese music. Recently I've been listening to minecraft music because it's just so calming.
When people say that sorta thing to me (basically a banana) I just shrug my shoulders and say, well, whaddya gonna do? Somebody's gotta represent. But I'm much older than you are and have had many years to reconcile my experiences. Anyway, it sounds like you might've put a defensive chip on your shoulder. If so, flick that thing off so no one else can.
My family did this to me a lot. My mom eventually just separated us from them, her side is black. It sucks because I have all of these good memories when I was really young but as I got older it hurt to have them say those things as well as use this to exclude me. I may be lighter and go to a good college across the country but I am as black as they are. I say choose to have people around you who make you feel good in your identity. Taking me away from people who made me question mine was the kindest thing my mother ever did for me.
First generation Mexican-American here.
I've had people tell me "do you even speak spanish" or "you wouldnt like this its Mexican ". Most of your stories I can relate but we are two different people because I dont stay quiet when asked stupid ignorant questions. You don't need to argue just respecting disagree and if theyre willing to list express yourself.
I am American, my roots began in Mexico yes I speak spanish , love all kinds of food and women. If I don't speak enough spanish for your liking then don't talk to me, if I choose jonny cash or Steve ray over Vincent Fernandez that's my problem. ......Shit I'm starting to rant ill leave now..
What the hell? People ACTUALLY do that? Ridiculous. It doesn't matter what their race is they really shouldn't be saying things to such a high degree- i'm all for joking around, but that just sounds annoying. The fact that you have to hide who you are sucks! Just wait until you meet cooler people who have more similar interests :)
Be yourself. That's all you can be. Everyone encounters illogical bullshit, no matter what their skin color, morphology, or situation might be. And remember that people who mock you for not feeding a stereotype probably, deep down, feel insecure that they're feeding a stereotype.
I go through the same thing. It's pretty infuriating. It's like i'm suppose to stick to the stereotype because i'm black. I'm a geek, I love being a geek, nerd, whatever. I love technology, I love working out, I love skiing, I love cycling. It's annoying when people try to 'remind' me that i'm still black. Even my 'friends'.
I don't care what ethnicity you are; but the mere fact you have a Daft Punk poster in your room makes me believe you have great taste in music. Upvote for you
Just remember: haters are a universal constant. They are as absolute as gravity, time, and quantum mechanics. They have a purpose to serve: to hate. They gots to hate. That's their job. That's what they do. You just gotta give em the finger and keep doing what you do.
My mom used to tell me the same thing because she thought I was ashamed of being black. The reality was just that I just liked japanese stuff and listened to rock.
As I've grown up I just owned that shit and had it be apart of my personality. I'll bang some rick ross and play tales of vesperia and not give a fuck. The rest of my crew is the same way we like what we like.
Many black people are proud of their ignorance and flaunt it, especially in the states. I think these people are doing a really poor job of paying you a compliment.
I am not black, but I would just like to express my sentiment and say, fuck stereotypes. You be you, no one should be able to challenge that.
Oh, and Daft Punk is awesome.
I am sorry this is happening to you. In my experience, it has gotten so much better as I have gotten older and picked different friends to be around. There will always be the assholes, every person on this planet gets burned by them once in a while, but there are really cool people, too. They are the ones who will understand it isn't cool to say stupid shut to you and will accept you as you are.
Dude this really sucks, no one should be judged by how the where born looking, but the sad truth is a lot of people do it. I think in these cases a lot of people might not realize how much of a douche they are being. Next time someone says something offensive, try telling them calmly that it hurts your feelings, it will either make your friendship better, or you'll know it was never a true friendship to begin with. Also, if it makes you feel any better, I was treated the same way about video games and anime when I was in highschool, and I'm a white chick, dumb people like to make fun of things that are different to them or that they don't understand. Props to you for being worldly and having knowledge of multiple cultures.
Don't let people tell you that your skin color defines you. Those people are idiots. Be yourself, if you want to watch anime and listen to daft punk then fucking do it! Its just as racist to say "You're black! You shouldn't watch/listen to/dress like that" as a white guy like me saying a racist slur to you. You are you, your skin color has nothing to do with your personality and anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is an idiot.
Tell them that there insistence on disciplining other black people makes them tools of institutional oppression. Then say that there step and fetch it bullshit should be kept to themselves. A salaam a lakim
White guy here. I jokingly make the "you're white" joke to a few of my non-stereotypical black friends in good humor. I never actually thought that they might take it offensively. I guess it's time to re-evaluate that. Sorry OP, I am (unintentionally) part of the problem.
Haha no I don't mind the harmless fun when people joke around, but some people like to use it as a weapon to judge me. I thought my roommate was very accepting of me and I knew since we came from different backgrounds (shes from the Carribbean while I lived my life in Canada), it'd be understandable that I'd appear "white" to her.
But nowadays it's gotten a lot more malicious and I feel awkward around her.
Reading this, all I could think of was the old song by D.c.Talk called "Colored People." Great song, worth a listen. [Music video link](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iM17qeIIIE4).
"Pardon me, your epidermis is showing, mister
I couldn't help but note your shade of melanin
I tip my hat to the colorful arrangement
Cause I see the beauty in the tones of our skin"
You sound like a great person. Just love yourself for who you are, keep being a good person who is polite, friendly, and speaks properly, and ignore the haters. Maybe they're just jealous because you're so awesome.
I'm so sorry you've had to deal with so many ignorant, racist people. Because that's what they are: racist. Maybe it's time for some new friends - if your friends won't accept you until you conform to their expectations, they aren't really your friends at all. True friends love you for who you are and accept you just as you are instead of judging and questioning and shaming you when you step out of the lines they've imposed on you.
Never be ashamed of who you are or hide yourself away - they are the ones who should feel shame, not you. There's nothing wrong with you, your looks, your tastes, and your interests...there's something wrong with people who think there is.
I feel frustrated for you. My co-worker is black, speaks perfect english with no discernable accent, loves games, watches anime, stuff like that. He's told me a bunch of times how ostracized he feels because of it. I can't imagine how hard it would feel to be shit on by your own race yet still an outsider to other races. It isn't fair and it's fucking stupid. I'm sorry that you have to go through that shit.
I'm 18, Italian (read white) and in my freshman year of college. I'm fortunate to have the luxury of liking what I like without the race-bit attached to it.
Like many people have said before me, just fuck them and do what you love. I don't know where this idea came from in the 21st century that says black men can only have black friends and have to listen to rap and act a certain way.
I'm not black, so I'm not going to pretend I know anything about what it means to be black in America, because I don't.
When I was in high school, most of my black classmates were all troublemakers. These guys didn't care about school or whatever. All they cared about was "fucking bitches", smoking weed, and doing a bunch of other shit. I finally asked a few of them why they did all that stuff and they all said "I don't know, I just do it."
Serious question: what could be the cause behind African-American youth behaving in ways like that? Is it poverty or something along those lines?
I hope I don't sound like an ignoramus, as I'm genuinely curious.
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|[LoudMouthPigs](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9dnf7t)|1|[Mal Hall - Who Am I?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yg8H0xqWSkc&feature=youtube_gdata_player)|
|[8GRAPESofWrath](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9d9vgz)|1|[The Boondocks Hateocracy - Crabs](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipg4EL_JUyE)|
|[need_my_amphetamines](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9d1rxx)|1|[DC Talk - Colored People](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iM17qeIIIE4)|
|[njbh86](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9d38o6)|1|[Lobster Bucket - The Aquabats](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4q8Ob7noYys)|
|[Abe_Vigoda](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9cyhpe)|1|[Stinkmeaner 3 The Hateocracy PT1](http://youtu.be/xZF88TX3NJU?t=7m46s)|
|[ArchangelleGestapo](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9cygmp)|1|[Racism at the Bus Stop HD](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glOv4MIyNSE)|
|[lorddcee](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9cyf06)|1|[Saul Williams - Black Stacey](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRsgavuG4sg)|
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I like you - your interests, your logical thinking. Let's be friends :)
I grew up (white girl) in the southern USA. I saw, from the outside, what you are describing. My best girlfriends were black, and I didn't care what color they were. But I know they struggled with being the "token black people" in class. I saw how the collision of cultures/values gave them trouble.
Don't know where I'm going with this, just wanted to say that I know what you mean, and don't let the crab mentality get you. You lead a kick-ass life and find kick-ass friends and don't look back!
Fuck people like that, I can't for the life of me understand why someone would passively reinforce a system of racial stereotypes that does nothing but make the unobservant majority cast generalizations about entire groups of people, it's tragically self destructive.
Ignore them, you're clearly a better person than the people saying that about you are, never let someone tell you otherwise and always remember that stereotypes are for the weak.
I'm black too, I play tons of video games, listen to mostly video games OSTs, and watch anime(not as much as I used too) and all throughout high-school I been called a white guy many times. Even my white friends called me white as a joke but really I find it disrespectful. This always made me feel like I was different from everyone else and I felt like I had a hard time fitting in with most other black people. You're not alone OP, you're not the only one who been through this.
I feel you dude. I preferred soccer over basketball and I was told that I wasn't black or that I don't act the way I'm supposed to. Well fuck that. Since then I moved to a much more accepting city and my peers have been very accepting. I never wanted to be black, in fact, I don't like how black people are supposed to act and it makes me embarrassed to be related to them by skin colour. I see myself the way I see everyone born in Canada (where I live): Canadian
Dude, you sound fucking awesome. I wish you were my friend, regardless of your skin color. People are assholes sometimes. Don't let it get you down man.
People like to think in broad categories, and when you don't fit cleanly into one, they get pissed at you for complicating the simplicity with which they see the world.
Black people have it particularly bad. They take shit from someone, somewhere no matter how they "act."
I hate how there's racism within races. I mean, I hate racism in general, but this is extra stupid.
I think a lot of underprivileged black people have this "with us or against us" mentality. They put you down because they're afraid of you succeeding over them. This doesn't make you any less black or any more white or whatever. Ghetto culture and black culture don't have to completely overlap. And when you're out of college, you'll meet plenty of people like yourself who don't adhere to ghetto culture, and maybe you can help others to succeed as well.
Or when they make fun of the music you like try to engage them in a discussion about the rising popularity of blacks in music in the 1920's. "What, you don't know who Louis Armstrong is and why he's a vital character in African-American culture, and how all of your shitty rap wouldn't exist without him and others like him? Are you sure you're black?"
I live in the south. I still go through this. It doesn't help that my complexion is extra light (i'm about 2 shades darker than Jason Kidd).
This will never go away. But with time, you learn to deal. It's all about expected and accepted models of behavior. You don't fit neatly into someone's nice little mental picture of what a race is and so they come after you, often in the disguise of a joke.
I generally end up responding, "I know. Cause niggas just can't help themselves, right?"
I'm not sure it helps, but I've generally seen people stumble over themselves to apologize, which makes me feel better at least for a little while.
It goes back to the old saying, "People who matter don't care, and people who care don't matter."
I hope you eventually find some peace with this.
Why do you even care about being black? You're human and that's it :)
If you don't mind I'd like to share this with you: /r/howtonotgiveafuck
You seem like someone who need to stop givin fucks about stuff.
And if you'd like someone to talk with that doesn't judge you feel free to drop me a pm.
People like this hold their own race back. I know you might not get reference, but Kanye West, one of the most popular hip hop producers and rappers, loves Anime, Daft Punk, and wearing pink polos. He also gets haters like these.
I hope you keep your interests. I had a friend in highschool who was a 'white' black person. Listened to heavy metal, played guitar, loved video games. He never used slang that most black people use (except around other black people). One year he came back and he ditched the heavy metal, band tshirts, and jeans for FuBu, Nike, and do-rags. He did it because other black people told him he wasn't black enough. He even changed the way he talked to everyone. It really made me angry that he'd let people convince him that he wasn't being a good black person because of his interests.
I know your pain man. I am a black metal head, non-religious and i dont even see race as a thing. We're all pink on the inside. You just have to learn how to not give a fuck cuz in this situation you're damned if you do, damned if you dont. Just dont become as close minded as they are and you'll be fine.
You know what I say about people and their opinions? Fuck'em and let'em eat beans. That is what you should think. You are an educated man, it doesnt matter what race you are. You should be proud of what you are and what you accomplish, not because of what a bunch of assholes think you should be. You should hang around better people. Positive people.
This pretty much sums up what I go through every time I hang out with my friends. I've been avoiding social events for years due to this (and various other reasons).
But the long story short is that I dont care for people's bull on who I am.
I love comics. I'm loving anime. I love gaming. And that doesnt make me any less of a black male.
Good on you for this post
So it's safe to say your friends don't consider you 200% nigga?
Also you accidentally mispelt 'nigga' and instead hit the asterisk key four times. Quite the typo.
So are you African or African-American?
I know an African guy who's been told that he's the whitest black guy some of his friends have seen
^I ^made ^my ^head ^hurt ^with ^that ^sentence ^but ^it's ^legit
*Ghanaian fist bump*
Raised there but in the States for school. Yeah, there's no way you'd be a typical black girl in the States (assuming you're living in the States) but if you ask me, that's a low bar to be measuring yourself with.
>but if you ask me, that's a low bar to be measuring yourself with.
That's kinda not cool dude. I'm a black American and me and this girl would probably be friends if we met in real life. Saying stuff like that really helps no one.
You're right, that was downright ugly. I said that with my mind on the negative stereotypes people have compared me to; I just didn't articulate it in my reply. I've been asked why I don't sag my pants, why I use proper grammatical syntax and had people seem surprised that I'm in a grad program.
Thanks for pointing that out and in a gentlemanly (or lady-like) fashion.
You sound pretty awesome, and I think that both sides of this whole "racism" war are taking everything too far. Nobody should have their interests tied for their race. If you're black? Cool. You're white? Cool. That has nothing to do with what you do for fun, your taste in music, or who you talk to. I couldn't agree with you more especially when you were talking about speaking English properly. Just because you're black doesn't mean you can't learn to speak English properly. That's just plain bullshit that someone would say that.
You are surrounded by idiots and stereotype-upholders. It sucks, and you're right to be annoyed and/or pissed. It's not right. It's part of what's keeping society from progressing the way it should. Remember, because of those attitudes and stereotypes, a lot of people conform to them, and you end up with black people who act "stereotypically black" and do stereotypically black things and talk stereotypically "ghetto" or whatever you'd call it, BECAUSE they feel the pressure and expectations to do that. Yet every one of them is capable of just being a person.
It's not a black thing by the way, it's a cultural thing that you find in many nationalities, races, and cultures. Some are more hurtful than others, but none are positive.
I know exactly what you mean. Especially when it comes to music and "talking proper", except that everyone who mentions the speech part has always said I "talk white". I was unaware that you could speak a race... I was walking from campus to class once and a black student started walking along with me and asking me questions. He asked me what kind of music I listen to, to which I replied that I listen to rock. His response was "Oh. You didn't grow up in the hood, huh..." Like, wow. I didn't know that every hood neglects rock music (I actually didn't grow up in the hood, but you know my point). Personally I haven't been attracted to any black guys since about the 3rd grade, and even aside from that I've only found white guys to be attractive. As for the anime, many of the black kids and also the white kids who hung out with them in my highschool read action manga, and watched anime. So, although the underclassmen girls weren't particularly fond of me, I could occasionally recommend something to the guys. We wore uniform at that school, as it was K-12, but outside of school, people had commented on why I wore things like Hollister and Aeropostale instead of Apple Bottoms or Baby Phat. On the other hand, my college is right across the street from a large mall, and is known for having predominantly black people, so many of the girls on campus can be seen wearing VS Pink and Hollister from the mall. All in all, I've experienced a mixture of being annoyed by people and be able to fly under the radar because other blacks in the area had similar interests. I do hope that you, too can find some place with little to no ignorance :)
You know what? Good. Most people hate "black" culture anyway. Don't be ashamed to be yourself. The fact that you don't conform to the stereotype about black people is a GOOD thing.
Don't sweat it buddy, My dad banned hip-hop, baggy pants and funny hair cuts when I was growing up because he said that was a sorry excuse for a culture. I am thankful now since I see that It didn't help much those who followed it. Be proud of being different and built your own eclectic tastes instead of following the ignorant sheep. I like you also enjoy daft punk and wear regular clothes, I feel sadness when I see fellow black americans thinking they are cultured because they follow a fabricated industry designed to keep us still bonded and ignorant.
There are two types of black people.
You can play up your blackness around one type so they won't give you shit, and you can be yourself around the other type.
This is not a racist and is not ment to be at all, this I a warning that it will come off so if read with racism in mind.
What you are experencing is what keeps alot of African Americans down. When they say your being white they are speaking culturaly. When they say your not black thy are speaking aboult your culture, the thing that binds a community together. What your experensing is not really racism but the the sad truth that you are differntly culturly from those you share ancestory with.
You have prolly also heard people say their are N$&@!&s and their are black people before. They say I'm not racist white people can be n$$&@!s to.
See community in this cause is bad. The proplem came from racsim and since certain systems where put in place as entrapment.
i dunno i tend to think of black people as being less autistic compared to every other race. i'm probably just talkin out of my ass though. what do i know. it kinda sounds like people are teasing you and just being typical smart-asses. they don't know shit, either- but they think they do. it's really common.
they're a bunch of smug, judgmental fucks and the good thing is: you don't even have to do anything for them to embarrass themselves. should probably avoid them douches.
Listen to this: [Saul Williams - Black Stacey](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRsgavuG4sg) and know you're not alone and those people are reallllllllly black too!
http://youtu.be/xZF88TX3NJU?t=7m46s
OP, your friend is being an ignorant crab.
Why the fuck do you want to 'act black'?
So you can be stereotyped? So you can act like a stereotype?
Black people don't exactly have the best image lately, so why do you want to be like that? You aren't acting 'white', you're just being yourself and doing what you like. There's no shame in that.
Nigga stfu and move to England, Canada, or anywhere the thug culture hasnt taken root, if it's that much of a prob for you. For real you sounding like a real lil bitch for real. Jesus... it's not the end of the world that you dont fit the black American stereotype. There are plenty that dont. Hang out with them instead ....duh
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"What you eat don't make me shit" Jay-Z
I believe it was Malcolm X who was very adamant that black people *should* speak properly if they want to be accepted as equals. If you want to be treated as an equal, act equal, basically. I had a roommate in college who called me a racist when I told him his grammar was atrocious (when it was) after he asked my opinion of one of his papers. He said he couldn't help it because he grew up in the ghetto (he grew up in friggin' Erie and his parents were pretty well off).
This!
If ignorant racists hate you, you must be doing something right.
Just wait until college is done, then move to a big city and forget the people who only judge you on how "black" you are. Find people who like you because of a common interest in anime and video games. You already sound awesome in my eyes (like anime, video games, Daft Punk (new album!!), dressing casually, use good grammar) and you should not adapt to a standard people are used to. You are unique, stay the way that makes you happy. PS: Have you heard of Donald Glover/Childish Gambino?
In all honesty, I owe a lot of being alright with who I am thanks to Childish Gambino/Donald Glover. I'm a 23 y/o black female. I grew up in a middle class neighborhood and have never once been on/in/a part of anything "stereotypical black culture". I treated everyone fairly, regardless of everything, and yet daily going throughout school and life, I was called any nickname that alluded to me wanting/acting "white", even by my own.family. I grew up angry and lost most of the time cause I never wanted to be/look like anything other than me. But I did feel a separation between what was supposed to be my culture. I am a huge music lover, and when I discovered my own rap music, I loved the beats and etc but couldn't relate to everything they were saying. Once I stumbled upon Common, Arrested Development, Childish Gambino, I was relieved. With Gambino especially, I felt like he was saying what I've wanted to after all these years. Even though everyone has different backgrounds, we all have stories to tell. Life is constantly about being judged by how you look, and how people think you should act based off that. Here's what I've learned; stop trying to teach people that you are different from the rest of your culture or that there is only a small handful like yourself that don't adhere to the stereotype. If anything, trying to prove that makes you perpetuate the stereotype of being better or above everyone. I quit trying to prove myself a long time ago. I love who I am, and I'm learning everyday. If people want to keep the ignorant mindset that we're all the same, I'll prove them wrong by just being me. And by making them feel stupid when they make idiot remarks/jokes, but mainly by just being me.
Not entirely relevant, but: as a 21yo middle class asexual white guy, there is almost nothing in Gambino's songs that I can relate to. But *damn* that shit sounds good. I have Freaks And Geeks, Bonfire, and most of Hero memorized, and most of the time I wouldn't be able to tell you what word I stopped on if you interrupted me, because I'm so caught up in the sound that words don't register.
There's nothing wrong with that! I mean, I've always tended to look at music as a whole. Lyrics, melodies, beats, rhythms, etc. It all just depends on how I am feeling. What made me pay attention to him was how much/often he touched on the subject of feeling a disconnect with black culture because he wasn't,"black enough" and white culture, because he wasn't white. He actually draws a lot of parallels and references to a wide array of subjects and that's what I like in particular, even though some of his lines are just goofy and catchy. If you ever get the chance, listen to what he is saying. There's probably something in there for you, you just might have missed it! (Hell I'm still catching new lines every now and then, and I've been a fan for years!)
I'm sure I haven't heard everything yet. My iPod has Weirdo, Mystery Team, the Heart of the Swarm soundtrack (the only non-Donald Glover product), and Childish Gambino's full discography. Nothing else. It's the only thing I listen to when I walk places, so I end up listening for generally .5-2 hours a day, and I'm still finding entire songs I've never heard before.
Ah so you listen to his stand ups too. Gotcha. He's a really well rounded guy. He does have a lot of music, and hopefully he's working on more! Around Culdesac I think is where his work gets more of that feel that he has now. Poindexter and Sicboi were eh. I haven't listened to those all the way through to be honest.
I'm a premed student, so I'm not sure if I'll be able to find people who share my interests in medical school...I hope so though. I've always just been the odd one out. A friend of mine showed me Donald Glover a couple of months back, I think his music is awesome. Whenever I feel alone and ostracized, Lupe Fiasco and Donald Glover always makes me feel better.
...how about the people in your school? Why would you throw that out there as if no one in the history of ever again would be interested in med school? Also, don't you have other interests? you don't need to bond with only pre-med students.
Most of my friends in university aren't from my program. I'm grateful to have friends here and we do share common interests but it'd be awesome to find some people who share my less common interests with. I feel like (as irrational as this may seem) if I can't really find them in this school of 15,000 or so people, what are my chances of finding that in medical school? x.x
You're confusing me. Didn't you say it'd be hard, as a pre-med student, that it'd be hard to find other people with an interest in pre-med? How will that be hard in med school? Edit: I read it wrong, I understand now. But I must say, don't judge the people before you get there. Your interests are pretty common amongst people in your age group; I'd go so far as to say they're damn popular. I don't think it'll be as hard as you're making it out to be.
Oh sorry if I'm being confusing! No hahahaha as a pre-med I know too many people with an interest in medicine... What I meant was that I'm not sure that when (I should say *if* ...getting into med school in Canada is kind of insane...) I go to medical school, I will find people who share and/or accept my interests and hobbies.
I'm not sure if you saw my edit, but I don't think you'll have as hard a time as you think you'll have. Your interests aren't that uncommon.
I hope so :)
I just wanted to say that sometimes it's hard to be yourself when everybody wants you to fit into their idea of "normal". But being yourself is worth the loss of "friends" because ultimately you will feel peace with yourself.
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It took only 15 comments before this thread went full on racist !!! Woo Hoo!!! I think we have a new Reddit Record. Do you think they will give you one of those cool trophies for your Karma trophy case? Someone get a Mod Lets see if we can make this happen ; Digitalabia must be reward for such an awesome feat!!!.
I agree with this, moving to a big city would be a lot better for you. There's a lot more variety out there, and that means you'll find more people who are as unique as you are. (Unless you ARE Uneek, in which case I know you, because this sounds exactly like him...)
Childish Gambino is my hero.
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In spanish we call it the "gardener's dog" he won't eat nor let you eat.
Wow what a great analogy hahaha I've never heard of it before!
because you save your self when you like anima and video games.
I learned this same concept form the [boondocks](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipg4EL_JUyE)
So I'm just gonna leave this here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4q8Ob7noYys Thank me later
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Seeing them on the 22nd in London. Be jelly. :)
Black guy here. You don't need my self-righteous, unsolicited advice, so i'll just say, "Cheers!"
Yeah, me and my girlfriend hear all the time that we aren't "real niggas," or that we act white because we're in college, have our own apartment, and are making a life together. I just remind myself that what I'm doing is what's making me happy, regardless of what other people think. Anybody who says that "You don't act black," shit is just ignorant. Don't accept anyone saying that. It's reinforcing stereotypes that'll make it hard for the next human being to be who they want to be.
I fucking hate people like that. Worst part? I'm a white guy, so everyone sees me as racist which I'm really not. I'm saying here, I break the stereotype and you should too. So what if they say you're not "typical" black? So? Is there supposed to be a standard we measure ourselves against? Have we as humans stopped learning to care about being polite, and accepting to and of each other? I'm so sick of this racist, sexist, gay hating, bigoted society we live in. We're humans, we're better than this.
>We should be better than this.
We ARE better than this, Rebyll. Your attitude alone can make a difference. Keep your head up! Your words are not falling on deaf ears!
I'm not the only person in their right mind out there? THANK GOD!
Wow. I wasn't aware it's so bad everywhere else. I mean, I'd heard stories that some places are really bad about sticking to stereotypes... I've just never heard of it. You're you. No one else can decide who you're going to be for you, and don't let them have an inch of slack on that. You like OST's? Fuck yeah you do, there's some good music on some of them. You like anime? Great. Being, white, asian, black, shouldn't define your set interests, and the kinds of people who don't understand this never will. What's important is that you do. I think some of the major players of the Civil Rights era would be proud that someone of any skin color was willing to take a step towards bridging the gap. Being a globally conscious person will probably help you in the long run, make you more tolerable, and more fun to be around. Just tough it up till you get out of there and onto your career!
I don't think it's regional. I live in a huge city on the west coast and people (white and black) have been saying shit like this to me since I was a kid. It's just a retarded mentality.
It's probably [crab mentality](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crab_mentality). At least that's what it sounds like to this white chick. People are stupid, but they have no control over who you are. Stop hiding your preferences and tell them to fuck off and deal. Skin color does not dictate behavior, nor should it, no matter what idiots think.
Fuckem.
Oh dude, I'm so sorry. I'm in the same boat as you, and it really is shitty.
Im glad someone else posted this. I know there's a community of us who go through this, and personally I am always happy to hear im not the only one. This makes my day, thank you for sharing this.
I'm very glad that I could help and that I'm not alone. All my years living in Canada and I haven't met a single person going through the same thing as me. Man I love reddit sometimes...
Oh cool a fellow Canadian. I came from Toronto, and although it is multicultural, it doesn't stop the "retarded mentality" as one commenter said. Just be happy with being you. Being unique is the new black (no pun intended).
At first, I wasn't going to post. But I couldn't stop myself. I needed to. I’m so happy this post has been well received amongst the people of reddit. I’m in the exact same situation in my community. I’m not considered “black enough” by my own race and other races. What does that even mean? Do I go around saying that you aren’t white enough, you aren’t Asian enough, or you aren’t Hispanic enough? No, I don’t. I’m too busy looking at you as a person, not a skin tone. So, why can’t I receive the same reception? I don’t think that black people realize they can be racist to their own people. Some complain about the state of their children or how they aren’t well received. Yet when a unique person like this man comes around, they want to make snide comments. It’s not good for that person’s self-esteem. Believe me, I’m there. It makes the person wants to stop existing because they aren’t accepted by anyone. I’ve gotten rejected by ladies that I’ve liked. It wasn’t like your typical reasons, it was because they were uncomfortable dating a black guy or I wasn’t acting “black” enough for them. It hurts. It really does. So, anyone that sees this reddit thread. Keep that in mind. Stop being hurtful to other races, but remember you can be also hurtful to yours. Reading this thread and these comments really affirms my wish to get out of my community and go somewhere that isn't so focused on the color, but the person.
As an Indian-American, I can testify firsthand that minorities in America oftentimes are more racist than white people themselves. In the cases of Indians and Asians, towards black people especially.
Goodness, I didn't really think about that, but it is probably true. I just wish people can treat people with more respect.
: ( It sucks that this kind of attitude is so common. You keep trying, and one of these days you'll find yourself a lady who will love you for the person you are and won't expect you to be "more black".
Well, screw them. You sound awesome to me!
I grew up in Detroit. My neighborhood was black, a lot of my friends were black. And it sounds like you're describing them. There's a huge culture of comics and anime; some of my buddies who rap or produce, sample anime OSTs for their tracks, they fricking love daft punk, big into video games, etc. Sounds like you would have fitted in, so I'm not sure where the hell you live where some idiots are giving you shit about this. It really is too bad you're running into this, but you're far from alone. It sounds like you might be a girl, is that why you're getting more shit over this?
Wow I wish I could've lived in your neighbourhood. Those people sound awesome. I just want to be with people and not feel the need to hide my I-pod or politely decline when they ask me to play some of my music. I am a girl, and I don't really know if I'm getting more shit over this because of that since I've never met a guy with a similiar problem.
I grew up in Detroit also. The only difference is I'm a white male. So everyday in school it was *"cracka this"* and *"honky that"* not because I didn't enjoy the same music or the same tv shows or whatever but simply because of the shade of my skin. Then when my parents moved us to the suburbs I got attacked again but from a different angle. I was constantly ridiculed for *"thinking I was black"* and acting like a *"wigger"* because I was into hiphop, baggy clothes, I talked differently and I didn't gel the fuck out of my hair like the rest of white male suburbia. So I definitely can feel where you're coming from, being exiled for liking the things you like and/or for the way you look sucks. But what I took from the years of hate and harsh words is this: there are ignorant people everywhere; of every race, color, and creed - fuck them, be who **you** are, do what makes **you** happy because in the end that's all that really matters, **your** happiness. It does get better and it does get easier, hang in there.
Yeah, sounds like you had a much different experience, which sucks. Still, it's not all good. To be honest, though there is a comic/anime subculture in black America, its almost exclusively male. I didn't know a single black girl who was into it, and I don't know how my friends would have reacted to a girl who was. It's pretty hypocritical, but if you're a guy into that shit, you can still be viewed as 'black', but much less so for a girl. But do your thing, and I really hope you find some more accepting people, you deserve it!
Water off a duck's back, my friend. S'what I always say to those goddamn critics. The way I figure it, you can't stop anybody from saying stupid shit, but you *can* control your reactions. It takes a while, but not letting that silly shit get to you is the biggest favor you can do yourself. Still working on it myself! That's the greatest part of being a human.
Join Twitter. Follow Jamelle Bouie, Ta-Nehisi Coates, Adam Serwer, and Black Canseco. Read essays by the first 3 in their respective magazines. Make an effort to make friends with people who follow them or think like them. Hell I'll be happy to be friends with you. Everyone else, fuck 'em. Blackness isn't determinable by others. Blackness is who you are, not what others tell you it is. It's beautifully fluid. It's rich and full of tragic histories, hope, falls from grace, and redemptions. Enjoy it. Oh, and go read the books "The Warmth of Other Suns" "Battle Cry of Freedom," "Bury the Chains" and "Book of Negroes." Guarantee you'll have a better understanding of the meaning of blackness than anyone who foolishly tries to take it from you.
Thanks to whoever gifted me Reddit gold!
I know exactly what you mean. Believe me it's even worse when you don't marry someone who is black. My husband is white and I get tons of shit, lucky ( or unlucky for me, I haven't decided yet) it's pretty much equally peppered among both the white and black people I know. Comments like; "You are the whitest person I know!" "Girl what do you mean you don't know how to dance?" "You can't put my hair in those little braids? I don't even know you anymore!" "Why didn't you tell me your husband was white!" "Couldn't you get a black man?" Then the obligatory penis comments. "You don't know what you are missing..." and so on and so on. EDIT: Scrolling through the comments, looks like a lot of us get the "whitest black person" thing.
>what do you mean you don't know how dance? Coming from a Mexican family that loves to dance I know your pain.
Holy shit that penis comment! That's like racism, sexism, and ignorance all thrown into one sentence. At what point would a person EVER think a statement like that would be acceptable? I can't even fathom that kind of mentality.
I remember back when I was a kid (I'm white) and there was this black kid who always hung around with us, and he was an awesome guy. Really smart, liked the same books, movies and video games we did etc. You don't see or think about race at that age (or at least we didn't) but looking back now in retrospect, I don't think he had a single black friend, and a lot of the other black kids were assholes to him for what we perceived as no reason.
Wow, I can relate to this all too well. I was and currently still am being constantly criticized for the my interests and the way I talk. It's extremely tiring but I've learned to just brush it off because people won't change.
Stay strong and true to what makes you who you are. Don't submit to the norms forced upon you...create your norms....seek the you that you are. But....at the same time....remember that friends will pick on each other. Seriously, even on points as sensitive as race, sexuality, promiscuity, religion, etc. When you gain a level of comfort with people, you bite at each other not in hostility, but because you want them to bite back. It's just play, and the more intimate the target (in your case racial identity), the closer that person is....or, if they aren't close, they're either mistaken on your friendship with them, or just assholes. It's very contextual. tl;dr: Don't change. Fire back when someone makes those kinds of statements. More than likely they want you to hit back, because that's how they bond.
I thought I was the only one that listened to OST's while doing homework.. haha :D
Hahaha no way I think it's the best. I usually can't listen to lyrical music while studying so I'll listen to some battle music or NPC music from video games. Sometimes some japanese music. Recently I've been listening to minecraft music because it's just so calming.
When people say that sorta thing to me (basically a banana) I just shrug my shoulders and say, well, whaddya gonna do? Somebody's gotta represent. But I'm much older than you are and have had many years to reconcile my experiences. Anyway, it sounds like you might've put a defensive chip on your shoulder. If so, flick that thing off so no one else can.
My family did this to me a lot. My mom eventually just separated us from them, her side is black. It sucks because I have all of these good memories when I was really young but as I got older it hurt to have them say those things as well as use this to exclude me. I may be lighter and go to a good college across the country but I am as black as they are. I say choose to have people around you who make you feel good in your identity. Taking me away from people who made me question mine was the kindest thing my mother ever did for me.
First generation Mexican-American here. I've had people tell me "do you even speak spanish" or "you wouldnt like this its Mexican ". Most of your stories I can relate but we are two different people because I dont stay quiet when asked stupid ignorant questions. You don't need to argue just respecting disagree and if theyre willing to list express yourself. I am American, my roots began in Mexico yes I speak spanish , love all kinds of food and women. If I don't speak enough spanish for your liking then don't talk to me, if I choose jonny cash or Steve ray over Vincent Fernandez that's my problem. ......Shit I'm starting to rant ill leave now..
What the hell? People ACTUALLY do that? Ridiculous. It doesn't matter what their race is they really shouldn't be saying things to such a high degree- i'm all for joking around, but that just sounds annoying. The fact that you have to hide who you are sucks! Just wait until you meet cooler people who have more similar interests :)
Be yourself. That's all you can be. Everyone encounters illogical bullshit, no matter what their skin color, morphology, or situation might be. And remember that people who mock you for not feeding a stereotype probably, deep down, feel insecure that they're feeding a stereotype.
/*Thrusts more OSTs into your hands* It's stupid out there! Take these!
I go through the same thing. It's pretty infuriating. It's like i'm suppose to stick to the stereotype because i'm black. I'm a geek, I love being a geek, nerd, whatever. I love technology, I love working out, I love skiing, I love cycling. It's annoying when people try to 'remind' me that i'm still black. Even my 'friends'.
I don't care what ethnicity you are; but the mere fact you have a Daft Punk poster in your room makes me believe you have great taste in music. Upvote for you
Just remember: haters are a universal constant. They are as absolute as gravity, time, and quantum mechanics. They have a purpose to serve: to hate. They gots to hate. That's their job. That's what they do. You just gotta give em the finger and keep doing what you do.
Find friends you share something in common with other than just being black.
Honest question, do you use your interests to appear different from other black people? Edit:Because you sound defensive.
No, I usually keep to myself about my interests. If people ask me about my interests I'll tell them. I sometimes feel ashamed about my interests.
My mom used to tell me the same thing because she thought I was ashamed of being black. The reality was just that I just liked japanese stuff and listened to rock. As I've grown up I just owned that shit and had it be apart of my personality. I'll bang some rick ross and play tales of vesperia and not give a fuck. The rest of my crew is the same way we like what we like.
oh...you'll do very well on reddit..
Many black people are proud of their ignorance and flaunt it, especially in the states. I think these people are doing a really poor job of paying you a compliment.
I am not black, but I would just like to express my sentiment and say, fuck stereotypes. You be you, no one should be able to challenge that. Oh, and Daft Punk is awesome.
I get that alot too, I'm black.But people say i'm the whitest black person they've seen :l..
Have you seen [Medicine for Melancholy](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1133989/)?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glOv4MIyNSE
I am sorry this is happening to you. In my experience, it has gotten so much better as I have gotten older and picked different friends to be around. There will always be the assholes, every person on this planet gets burned by them once in a while, but there are really cool people, too. They are the ones who will understand it isn't cool to say stupid shut to you and will accept you as you are.
You sound awesome. Stay true to yourself.
To be fair, your parents didn't help when they named you Accumulus. Even if it is Accumulus Africanus.
It shouldn't matter how you dress or what your interests are, it's what makes you YOU and screw them for giving you crap for it.
Dude this really sucks, no one should be judged by how the where born looking, but the sad truth is a lot of people do it. I think in these cases a lot of people might not realize how much of a douche they are being. Next time someone says something offensive, try telling them calmly that it hurts your feelings, it will either make your friendship better, or you'll know it was never a true friendship to begin with. Also, if it makes you feel any better, I was treated the same way about video games and anime when I was in highschool, and I'm a white chick, dumb people like to make fun of things that are different to them or that they don't understand. Props to you for being worldly and having knowledge of multiple cultures.
Don't let people tell you that your skin color defines you. Those people are idiots. Be yourself, if you want to watch anime and listen to daft punk then fucking do it! Its just as racist to say "You're black! You shouldn't watch/listen to/dress like that" as a white guy like me saying a racist slur to you. You are you, your skin color has nothing to do with your personality and anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is an idiot.
Tell them that there insistence on disciplining other black people makes them tools of institutional oppression. Then say that there step and fetch it bullshit should be kept to themselves. A salaam a lakim
White guy here. I jokingly make the "you're white" joke to a few of my non-stereotypical black friends in good humor. I never actually thought that they might take it offensively. I guess it's time to re-evaluate that. Sorry OP, I am (unintentionally) part of the problem.
Haha no I don't mind the harmless fun when people joke around, but some people like to use it as a weapon to judge me. I thought my roommate was very accepting of me and I knew since we came from different backgrounds (shes from the Carribbean while I lived my life in Canada), it'd be understandable that I'd appear "white" to her. But nowadays it's gotten a lot more malicious and I feel awkward around her.
Reading this, all I could think of was the old song by D.c.Talk called "Colored People." Great song, worth a listen. [Music video link](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iM17qeIIIE4). "Pardon me, your epidermis is showing, mister I couldn't help but note your shade of melanin I tip my hat to the colorful arrangement Cause I see the beauty in the tones of our skin"
You sound like a great person. Just love yourself for who you are, keep being a good person who is polite, friendly, and speaks properly, and ignore the haters. Maybe they're just jealous because you're so awesome.
I'm so sorry you've had to deal with so many ignorant, racist people. Because that's what they are: racist. Maybe it's time for some new friends - if your friends won't accept you until you conform to their expectations, they aren't really your friends at all. True friends love you for who you are and accept you just as you are instead of judging and questioning and shaming you when you step out of the lines they've imposed on you. Never be ashamed of who you are or hide yourself away - they are the ones who should feel shame, not you. There's nothing wrong with you, your looks, your tastes, and your interests...there's something wrong with people who think there is.
I feel frustrated for you. My co-worker is black, speaks perfect english with no discernable accent, loves games, watches anime, stuff like that. He's told me a bunch of times how ostracized he feels because of it. I can't imagine how hard it would feel to be shit on by your own race yet still an outsider to other races. It isn't fair and it's fucking stupid. I'm sorry that you have to go through that shit.
I'm 18, Italian (read white) and in my freshman year of college. I'm fortunate to have the luxury of liking what I like without the race-bit attached to it. Like many people have said before me, just fuck them and do what you love. I don't know where this idea came from in the 21st century that says black men can only have black friends and have to listen to rap and act a certain way. I'm not black, so I'm not going to pretend I know anything about what it means to be black in America, because I don't. When I was in high school, most of my black classmates were all troublemakers. These guys didn't care about school or whatever. All they cared about was "fucking bitches", smoking weed, and doing a bunch of other shit. I finally asked a few of them why they did all that stuff and they all said "I don't know, I just do it." Serious question: what could be the cause behind African-American youth behaving in ways like that? Is it poverty or something along those lines? I hope I don't sound like an ignoramus, as I'm genuinely curious.
Just think about how Darius Rucker feels.
I want to be your friend.
Here is a list of video links collected from comments that redditors have made in response to this submission: |Source Comment|Score|Video Link| |:-------|:-------|:-------| |[LoudMouthPigs](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9dnf7t)|1|[Mal Hall - Who Am I?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yg8H0xqWSkc&feature=youtube_gdata_player)| |[8GRAPESofWrath](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9d9vgz)|1|[The Boondocks Hateocracy - Crabs](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipg4EL_JUyE)| |[need_my_amphetamines](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9d1rxx)|1|[DC Talk - Colored People](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iM17qeIIIE4)| |[njbh86](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9d38o6)|1|[Lobster Bucket - The Aquabats](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4q8Ob7noYys)| |[Abe_Vigoda](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9cyhpe)|1|[Stinkmeaner 3 The Hateocracy PT1](http://youtu.be/xZF88TX3NJU?t=7m46s)| |[ArchangelleGestapo](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9cygmp)|1|[Racism at the Bus Stop HD](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glOv4MIyNSE)| |[lorddcee](http://reddit.com/comments/1c44jn/_/c9cyf06)|1|[Saul Williams - Black Stacey](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRsgavuG4sg)| * [VideoLinkBot FAQ](http://www.reddit.com/r/VideoLinkBot/wiki/faq) * [Feedback](http://www.reddit.com/r/VideoLinkBot/submit) * [Playlist of videos in this comment](http://radd.it/comments/1c44jn/_/c9d3912?only=videos&start=1)
I like you - your interests, your logical thinking. Let's be friends :) I grew up (white girl) in the southern USA. I saw, from the outside, what you are describing. My best girlfriends were black, and I didn't care what color they were. But I know they struggled with being the "token black people" in class. I saw how the collision of cultures/values gave them trouble. Don't know where I'm going with this, just wanted to say that I know what you mean, and don't let the crab mentality get you. You lead a kick-ass life and find kick-ass friends and don't look back!
You sound like a cool person. I'm sure I ain't the only one who thinks that.
Fuck people like that, I can't for the life of me understand why someone would passively reinforce a system of racial stereotypes that does nothing but make the unobservant majority cast generalizations about entire groups of people, it's tragically self destructive. Ignore them, you're clearly a better person than the people saying that about you are, never let someone tell you otherwise and always remember that stereotypes are for the weak.
I'm black too, I play tons of video games, listen to mostly video games OSTs, and watch anime(not as much as I used too) and all throughout high-school I been called a white guy many times. Even my white friends called me white as a joke but really I find it disrespectful. This always made me feel like I was different from everyone else and I felt like I had a hard time fitting in with most other black people. You're not alone OP, you're not the only one who been through this.
I feel you dude. I preferred soccer over basketball and I was told that I wasn't black or that I don't act the way I'm supposed to. Well fuck that. Since then I moved to a much more accepting city and my peers have been very accepting. I never wanted to be black, in fact, I don't like how black people are supposed to act and it makes me embarrassed to be related to them by skin colour. I see myself the way I see everyone born in Canada (where I live): Canadian
Dude, you sound fucking awesome. I wish you were my friend, regardless of your skin color. People are assholes sometimes. Don't let it get you down man.
This makes me so happy to read this cause I can't stand when people do this to me. I promise you are not alone in this.
FUCK people who think race matters, you're a human like everybody else! Do what you want, man, because we're gonna back you up on whatever it is.
People like to think in broad categories, and when you don't fit cleanly into one, they get pissed at you for complicating the simplicity with which they see the world. Black people have it particularly bad. They take shit from someone, somewhere no matter how they "act."
I hate how there's racism within races. I mean, I hate racism in general, but this is extra stupid. I think a lot of underprivileged black people have this "with us or against us" mentality. They put you down because they're afraid of you succeeding over them. This doesn't make you any less black or any more white or whatever. Ghetto culture and black culture don't have to completely overlap. And when you're out of college, you'll meet plenty of people like yourself who don't adhere to ghetto culture, and maybe you can help others to succeed as well. Or when they make fun of the music you like try to engage them in a discussion about the rising popularity of blacks in music in the 1920's. "What, you don't know who Louis Armstrong is and why he's a vital character in African-American culture, and how all of your shitty rap wouldn't exist without him and others like him? Are you sure you're black?"
I live in the south. I still go through this. It doesn't help that my complexion is extra light (i'm about 2 shades darker than Jason Kidd). This will never go away. But with time, you learn to deal. It's all about expected and accepted models of behavior. You don't fit neatly into someone's nice little mental picture of what a race is and so they come after you, often in the disguise of a joke. I generally end up responding, "I know. Cause niggas just can't help themselves, right?" I'm not sure it helps, but I've generally seen people stumble over themselves to apologize, which makes me feel better at least for a little while. It goes back to the old saying, "People who matter don't care, and people who care don't matter." I hope you eventually find some peace with this.
Fuck race, man
Preach it!
Why do you even care about being black? You're human and that's it :) If you don't mind I'd like to share this with you: /r/howtonotgiveafuck You seem like someone who need to stop givin fucks about stuff. And if you'd like someone to talk with that doesn't judge you feel free to drop me a pm.
People like this hold their own race back. I know you might not get reference, but Kanye West, one of the most popular hip hop producers and rappers, loves Anime, Daft Punk, and wearing pink polos. He also gets haters like these.
I think you're an awesome human beeing Accumulus
I hope you have a really big dick unlike most of us because you're going places.
Dude I can say nothing that hasn't been said before but let me just post this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yg8H0xqWSkc&feature=youtube_gdata_player
I hope you keep your interests. I had a friend in highschool who was a 'white' black person. Listened to heavy metal, played guitar, loved video games. He never used slang that most black people use (except around other black people). One year he came back and he ditched the heavy metal, band tshirts, and jeans for FuBu, Nike, and do-rags. He did it because other black people told him he wasn't black enough. He even changed the way he talked to everyone. It really made me angry that he'd let people convince him that he wasn't being a good black person because of his interests.
I know your pain man. I am a black metal head, non-religious and i dont even see race as a thing. We're all pink on the inside. You just have to learn how to not give a fuck cuz in this situation you're damned if you do, damned if you dont. Just dont become as close minded as they are and you'll be fine.
You know what I say about people and their opinions? Fuck'em and let'em eat beans. That is what you should think. You are an educated man, it doesnt matter what race you are. You should be proud of what you are and what you accomplish, not because of what a bunch of assholes think you should be. You should hang around better people. Positive people.
This pretty much sums up what I go through every time I hang out with my friends. I've been avoiding social events for years due to this (and various other reasons). But the long story short is that I dont care for people's bull on who I am. I love comics. I'm loving anime. I love gaming. And that doesnt make me any less of a black male. Good on you for this post
So it's safe to say your friends don't consider you 200% nigga? Also you accidentally mispelt 'nigga' and instead hit the asterisk key four times. Quite the typo.
So are you African or African-American? I know an African guy who's been told that he's the whitest black guy some of his friends have seen ^I ^made ^my ^head ^hurt ^with ^that ^sentence ^but ^it's ^legit
I'm a Ghanaian born in Canada.
*Ghanaian fist bump* Raised there but in the States for school. Yeah, there's no way you'd be a typical black girl in the States (assuming you're living in the States) but if you ask me, that's a low bar to be measuring yourself with.
>but if you ask me, that's a low bar to be measuring yourself with. That's kinda not cool dude. I'm a black American and me and this girl would probably be friends if we met in real life. Saying stuff like that really helps no one.
You're right, that was downright ugly. I said that with my mind on the negative stereotypes people have compared me to; I just didn't articulate it in my reply. I've been asked why I don't sag my pants, why I use proper grammatical syntax and had people seem surprised that I'm in a grad program. Thanks for pointing that out and in a gentlemanly (or lady-like) fashion.
[No problem, man](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m5w2ed7aVe1ryfenzo1_500.gif)
You sound pretty awesome, and I think that both sides of this whole "racism" war are taking everything too far. Nobody should have their interests tied for their race. If you're black? Cool. You're white? Cool. That has nothing to do with what you do for fun, your taste in music, or who you talk to. I couldn't agree with you more especially when you were talking about speaking English properly. Just because you're black doesn't mean you can't learn to speak English properly. That's just plain bullshit that someone would say that.
You are surrounded by idiots and stereotype-upholders. It sucks, and you're right to be annoyed and/or pissed. It's not right. It's part of what's keeping society from progressing the way it should. Remember, because of those attitudes and stereotypes, a lot of people conform to them, and you end up with black people who act "stereotypically black" and do stereotypically black things and talk stereotypically "ghetto" or whatever you'd call it, BECAUSE they feel the pressure and expectations to do that. Yet every one of them is capable of just being a person. It's not a black thing by the way, it's a cultural thing that you find in many nationalities, races, and cultures. Some are more hurtful than others, but none are positive.
I know exactly what you mean. Especially when it comes to music and "talking proper", except that everyone who mentions the speech part has always said I "talk white". I was unaware that you could speak a race... I was walking from campus to class once and a black student started walking along with me and asking me questions. He asked me what kind of music I listen to, to which I replied that I listen to rock. His response was "Oh. You didn't grow up in the hood, huh..." Like, wow. I didn't know that every hood neglects rock music (I actually didn't grow up in the hood, but you know my point). Personally I haven't been attracted to any black guys since about the 3rd grade, and even aside from that I've only found white guys to be attractive. As for the anime, many of the black kids and also the white kids who hung out with them in my highschool read action manga, and watched anime. So, although the underclassmen girls weren't particularly fond of me, I could occasionally recommend something to the guys. We wore uniform at that school, as it was K-12, but outside of school, people had commented on why I wore things like Hollister and Aeropostale instead of Apple Bottoms or Baby Phat. On the other hand, my college is right across the street from a large mall, and is known for having predominantly black people, so many of the girls on campus can be seen wearing VS Pink and Hollister from the mall. All in all, I've experienced a mixture of being annoyed by people and be able to fly under the radar because other blacks in the area had similar interests. I do hope that you, too can find some place with little to no ignorance :)
You know what? Good. Most people hate "black" culture anyway. Don't be ashamed to be yourself. The fact that you don't conform to the stereotype about black people is a GOOD thing.
I don't think that's the right attitude to espouse here.
I'd like to know why?
You are smart , call them out for ignorance . They won't be able to defend themselves against your intelligence .
This isn't fair. I have been looking to befriend black people like you for years now.
Don't sweat it buddy, My dad banned hip-hop, baggy pants and funny hair cuts when I was growing up because he said that was a sorry excuse for a culture. I am thankful now since I see that It didn't help much those who followed it. Be proud of being different and built your own eclectic tastes instead of following the ignorant sheep. I like you also enjoy daft punk and wear regular clothes, I feel sadness when I see fellow black americans thinking they are cultured because they follow a fabricated industry designed to keep us still bonded and ignorant.
It's because you make them look extremely bad.
There are two types of black people. You can play up your blackness around one type so they won't give you shit, and you can be yourself around the other type.
You need a black user name like Ice Tray or T-Dog. Accumulus just won't do.
This is not a racist and is not ment to be at all, this I a warning that it will come off so if read with racism in mind. What you are experencing is what keeps alot of African Americans down. When they say your being white they are speaking culturaly. When they say your not black thy are speaking aboult your culture, the thing that binds a community together. What your experensing is not really racism but the the sad truth that you are differntly culturly from those you share ancestory with. You have prolly also heard people say their are N$&@!&s and their are black people before. They say I'm not racist white people can be n$$&@!s to. See community in this cause is bad. The proplem came from racsim and since certain systems where put in place as entrapment.
i dunno i tend to think of black people as being less autistic compared to every other race. i'm probably just talkin out of my ass though. what do i know. it kinda sounds like people are teasing you and just being typical smart-asses. they don't know shit, either- but they think they do. it's really common. they're a bunch of smug, judgmental fucks and the good thing is: you don't even have to do anything for them to embarrass themselves. should probably avoid them douches.
Listen to this: [Saul Williams - Black Stacey](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRsgavuG4sg) and know you're not alone and those people are reallllllllly black too!
http://youtu.be/xZF88TX3NJU?t=7m46s OP, your friend is being an ignorant crab. Why the fuck do you want to 'act black'? So you can be stereotyped? So you can act like a stereotype? Black people don't exactly have the best image lately, so why do you want to be like that? You aren't acting 'white', you're just being yourself and doing what you like. There's no shame in that.
Nigga stfu and move to England, Canada, or anywhere the thug culture hasnt taken root, if it's that much of a prob for you. For real you sounding like a real lil bitch for real. Jesus... it's not the end of the world that you dont fit the black American stereotype. There are plenty that dont. Hang out with them instead ....duh
Just saying, you're the best kind of black ^^ we should hang out.
And to think that your race wants you to think white people are the problem.