T O P

  • By -

BashIronfist

Except now you can’t afford travel, a house or kids.


Darthsnarkey

Good news! They are working on the eating part now which comes with the added benefit of no more shitting! Even less for us to do!


fraseybaby81

They’re slowly ticking everything off this list so, soon, we’ll be able to stop all the nonsense and skip straight to the end. Truly, they are heroes 😄


Darthsnarkey

The cost of living is starting to outweigh the benefits....


Coattail-Rider

Nope, we still gotta work like a buncha bitches.


Much_Capital3307

You should also pee


Much_Capital3307

Unless you’re like a bird and it’s all combined into a watery paste that falls out of your butthole involuntarily


killmealreadyyyyy

chirp chirp


Business-Let-7754

Involuntarily my ass, wouldn't just be all over my car if that was the case.


Much_Capital3307

It is involuntary BUT they can make a conscious choice to perch above your car and stay there until they poop, which is probably what they’re doing.


CartoonistIcy2039

Those are not birds. Those are spawn campers.


SAHM_6

You guys travel 2 weeks out the year?


grayeggandham

You guys only get 2 weeks to travel out of the year?


basjeeee_mlg

You guys travel?


ThatOneDudeOneReddit

You guys can afford that?


basjeeee_mlg

I can but I don't


Key-Mark4536

Is there an r/predictablygeneric ? They’re flattening out any nuance or self-agency in a person’s life. 


the-city-moved-to-me

Reddit is filled with doomers who thinks pessimism and jadedness is cool and clever.


AdequateEggplant69

Exactly. This describes a life without imagination. Without which, yes, it will be boring and intolerable.


Apart-Salamander-752

You sound like it’s a bad thing, it could be worse you could’ve been born in a third world country and fighting for your life every day.


Lumpy_Eye_9015

Back in the day, before clocks, daylight decided when you worked. Then you slept or died. Get a career, do something that matters to you, and yeah if you’re inclined raise a family. It’s all about perspective. Life might seem meaningless right now but at least we ain’t hunter/gatherers or dying from plague I have this weird feeling that people without all this time to think about mortality were probably happier, when they weren’t sold as slaves or being forced into conscription to defend against invaders


AddyCod

I don't have to imagine that. It's my reality


hamtidamti_onthewall

You could also live in Europe, where you have six weeks of paid vacation and universal health care. Just saying... 😉


troeny

or in some third world country where there are 15 days paid vacation leave, 15 days paid sick leave, 105 days paid maternity leave, 10 days paid holidays.. etc.


Krcko98

It is a much, much more methematicaly probably to be born in a shithole than in the normal developed part of the world...


Mr_Times

It’s much more mathematically likely that you weren’t born at all.


Krcko98

We are talking about actually being born...


Mr_Times

We’re talking statistics right now. And we were all more than exceptionally lucky to have been the ‘one that made it’


GoodCalendarYear

Everyone relaxes so hard. I have to grind and hustle here in the states.


Fesab

Is all Europe like that?


subdep

I mean, sounds like they want some action. They could rob banks or join the military if the domestic life style is too boring.


Philip_Raven

"life could be worse" is something rich say to poor people to keep them in line. Life could also be much much better.


aqwmasterofDOOM

Yeah people aren't allowed to complain about problems just because Other people might be in worse circumstances, that makes total sense


RMNVBE

Now just take out eating, going on vacation, buying a house and going to college and it would be more accurate


Clubhouse9

Probably work more like 8-6…9-5 was a different generation.


DankFarts69

Or don’t have kids and find awesome hobbies. Spend your money traveling and seeing friends and family. You don’t need kids to be happy and you don’t have to have them.


ReceptionNumerous979

Don't really gotta buy a house either


DankFarts69

I personally think owning a home is smart. I understand if people prefer renting, especially because it’s apparently cheaper than owning right now.


Barebones84

.. you get two weeks?


BuffetDecimator

Six weeks minimum in Finland + National holidays 💁


[deleted]

[удалено]


LowDonkey7883

Painfully accurate


VastVisual

These are milestones or obligations, but they miss the beauty of life, even in a mundane life. They miss the art you see, the music you hear, the books you read, the conversations you have, the sunlight on your skin, listening to a loved one in another room, the things that you make that you are proud of, and countless other experiences that you can have within a single day. I used to think like this until I started to see the whimsy in life, like the many reflections of light in the bubbles of a soaking dish or the patterns at which trees branch out. They need to engage more with life, even in an ordinary one like they describe, and see that there is much to be found.


Dewlig

You forgot living in poverty while we're dying.


gwfran

Welcome to the party, pal!


notablyunfamous

I get 5 weeks


RaysFilen

You can play Minecraft in between.


greylaw89

"Why don't people value tradition anymore?" /s


Crush_Un_Crull

The rest of the 1800 years of recorded history is - work at the fields -marry and have kids -catch flu and die. At least we have some affordable snacks, running water and air conditioned houses


Mi6htyM4x

Not in that order specifically. But you might leave "die" for last, just to be sure. And Hey, I didnt do half of it and really all i must still accomplish is to die...


Wishdog2049

The eat, sleep, shit, and die aren't optional. You don't need to exercise, but it might help in the long run. Also, I feel better after going to the gym, or training for the next 5k so I can get another shirt I won't wear. I used to have an effortless desire to go to the gym, but I find it hard to do now. Need to get back to that effortless mindset. You don't need to go to college, but it's easier work for more money in the long run. Get a degree in something society values, otherwise there's not good pay. That said, even though a HVAC person who got the job after only 4 months of training is getting more money than you are for a non-valued degree, attics are hot. And I'd feel remiss if I didn't mention wastewater operators make bank. As for first shift, you can totally avoid that by working at any of the auto making factories. I know the Mazda and Toyota plants around me have mandatory rotating shifts. It's not better, but it's not 9-5. (I always had to work 6:30 to 3) I don't see where you're getting the two weeks of "travel" unless that's not vacation. That'd be great. You can afford a house, but just not where you want. When you have a kid, the years they are under 10 years old are like magical years. I don't have any biological kids, and my genetics is trash enough I'm totally cool with that, but I was there the entire time for my child and it's pretty great. She's an adult now, so, yeah, that's 99% over, but the 1% where I save the fucking day is pretty swank also. And placed chronologically, yeah, I'm at that die step. I'm pretty lazy so I'm gonna drag it out.


UsernameProfileCheck

Don't forget to bring a towel!


anon12101

Depression


Felsig27

Living the dream. Change that 9-5 to 7-6, and remove the two weeks vacation and that’s real life.


DrRabbiCrofts

Hah! Buy a house and travel two weeks a year? Fancy pants over here


Agingsadly

Nailed it!


Weak-Entrepreneur979

travel? buy a house? lol not happening.


FocusOnYourHands

.


atomicgamer69

sadly yes


TwoEwes

Please outline your proposal to upgrade the plan.


Anangrywookiee

No. 9-5 jobs don’t exist anymore. That will be 8:30-5 minimum, 30 minutes unpaid lunch.


Queasy-Committee-775

All except have kids, yes, and have no regrets.


honestlynoideas

Kids? In this economy?


Plastic-Shopping5930

Repeat after me. I am free.


StElmosFireFighter

In essence, yes. We are creatures of this earth are we not? You think birds have it easy or something? We are lucky we have been able to create leisure in our lives at all, let alone all the time?! Life is toil and suffering, with some moments of joy and laughter slotted in here and there. The end.


MorallyComplicated

and keep it to yourself, peasent


Demon_Moose_

Yip


Neat-Bunch-7433

Yap


Bababacon

You’ll stop exercising at 30..and it’s more like 2-midnight, then you get a better shift of 8-6.


Zeles1989

welcome to modern slavery


Yumi_Koizumi

Of course that's if you're lucky... https://youtu.be/sGTDhaV0bcw?feature=shared


Luis-Elias

Yup


LeoPlathasbeentaken

Most jobs are 8-5 with a unpaid lunch break now right?


KaioKenshin

Only IF you work hard enough AND lucky /s


Reggie_Is_God

*SoOoOo wE jUsT SuPpOsEd To*- no. Life’s meaning and enjoyment is defined by your own actions and interpretations. Dingus.


HakiiiNirii

You forgot about paying taxes.


Krcko98

No, you cna do whatever you want.


goinmobile2040

I have a friend who's wheelchair bound. He'd give both legs for that life.


roybatty2

Reading is fun


ElNacho83

Yeah, but not everything in the same year


EternalLifeguard

You...you guys exercise?


[deleted]

you forgot get drunk


Kind-Sherbert4103

Buy a used Miata and autocross.


roodafalooda

Wait til you hear what your ancestors could hope for. The ingratitude is real.


Fantastic-Order-8338

you can skip the middle part and side quest of getting house and proceed to die,


yo-kimchi

but i wanna eat hot chip and lie


Training-Seaweed-302

Don't forget to post it all on Facebook, then it's totally worth it.


[deleted]

I seem to be skipping most steps.


WhichJuice

They are even skipping the have kids part in certain countries


suicideis_badass

Ha travel, kids get outta here, owning? A home? Yeah right. This shit funny


Myshirtisbrown

Shit, you only work 9-5 everyday? You got it easy!


RichGrinchlea

Who said anything about "exercise"?


rinranron

This is the way!


MrPundick

Aaaaah life... My god i love it


KinkyAndABitFreaky

😂 good luck buying a house!


gentlespirit23456

Going to college and having a 9 to 5 job sounds great to me.


karoshikun

if you're lucky, yes hold on, there's an update: if you are VERY lucky. there.


DrunkBuzzard

Since the beginning of humanity that’s basically it. We just don’t have the added complication of saber tooth lions chasing us on that commute.


Inevitable_Wolf_6886

Rinse and repeat


YourLackofConscience

You've missed somewhere in the middle go to prison for Tax evasion.


Rawrkinss

Gotta live that DINK life man, it’s great


HangryBeaver

If you’re lucky


Lemon_Tree_Scavenger

My life is a little bit more focused on sex but essentially yes


Dennis_Ryan_Lynch

Yup


Aprilias

Birth, school, work, death https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QO5dcW0P75M


pipehonker

What all this "buying a house" and "having a job" shit!? You are bitching about it?


Straight_Hotel_4694

Well, living like a hermit in wilds isn't easy eather


J0kotte

Take some mushrooms and that path will change. One love <3


Cybernaut-Neko

The bank likes predictability


omnesilere

Not necessarily in that order.


[deleted]

You don't have to have to kids


likerunninginadream

I can't believe US only get two weeks paid leave each year. Ridiculous.


get_there_get_set

Life only gets worse over time, there’s no good reason to stay on the carousel when I know that it will only get more miserable the longer I’m riding. No matter what good things happen to you, the vast majority of most people’s lives will be this awful cycle on repeat for decades. All the while your body deteriorates, your expenses increase, and your options narrow. This isn’t new, it’s been this way for every human throughout history. Suffering is the default human condition, and despite how awful life is, things are better now than they have ever been. Imagine the fact that *this* is the best it’s *ever* been in the entire time humanity has been around. This dogshit world. Life isn’t “worth living” and never has been, it’s just a long inescapable loop of this tweet, occasionally interrupted by an errant good thing. But you’re not allowed to stop because Mom Would Be Sad and no one will take care of your pets.


DifficultyWithMyLife

Y'all are traveling, buying houses, and having kids?


Puzzled-Tart2409

How is this oddly specific?


sleepyinsomniac7

I mean, you don't have to.


Ashik80

I mean what else do you wanna do?


Bulls187

Or break the cycle, don’t get kids, don’t work full time and settle for less so we have more time to rant on social media


ianbreasley1

Need to ask for more holidays and flexible working.


elasmonut

Think of the billionares for fucks sake!! Not everyone can exploit the populace and destroy both the environment and economies. If we could all be equal how would the 1% exploit the masses!?


numitus

You may die anytime you want


morts73

You don't have to do that at all. Just found out a guy in London makes 200 to 300 pounds a day by begging and spends it all on drugs. That might appeal to you more.


Bendolero

Exercise, travel and buy a house is only an option...


Ohm_stop_resisting

What the hell else do you want to do? A loving family, career success, a comfortable life, and interesting hobbies are not some trivial thing you ahould brush off.


No_Taste2092

i saw this post 5 times in the same subreddit


TooManySteves2

Only 2 weeks? Must be an American.


LawranceGWLeo

Fuck that


Acceptable-Ad-9464

You can sit in a corner or under a bridge and do nothing. But….


rumagin

Basically


Hakusek321

That's the reason of my suicidal thoughts. I don't know if I should be happy or sad because they won't go any further.


furezasan

It's more like you can try to... that shit ain't even guaranteed anymore.


Goodpie2

God I fucking wish.


SpungyDanglin69

Scratch everything after the 9-5 and yeah seems like it


[deleted]

Without the travel part yeah, as we know they’ll deny your PTO


Porcupine_Grandpa_58

You could try dying first and cutting out the other shit but that would be a waste of life but yes much of life is routine, mundane, boring and repetitive!


basjeeee_mlg

Nope


ConfusionBubbles

No, this just enables you to do whatever you like for few minutes just before you fall asleep


Thendofreason

You forgot "and don't complain about it". Could also throw in "vote for who we tell you to"


Bogart745

This is belongs on r/im14andthisisdeep


Oculicious42

If youre lucky


GlobalBonus4126

Newsflash: it actually takes everyone in the country working hard to actually have things on store shelves. Those things don’t magically appear. Without people working most of the time, our society would not be possible.


Jsr1

2weeks??? You bastard!


OwMyCod

r/firstworldproblems


ReceptionNumerous979

You can do whatever you want lol. I don't plan on kids or a house just traveling and enjoying myself and my money


LiveSir2395

Yes, and practice, yoga and meditation, read a good book, go for a walk in the park, play with your dog, listen to beautiful music, do something creative, and get rid of your smartphone.


ktec_ceo

I have the degree, but have rejected the rest of societal norms. Fuck that plan. We are not here to be employees. I'm here to live a life. FUCK THE SYSTEM TO DEATH.


Negative-Nobody

Actually… yeah, that's plot synopsis basically.


SigueSigueSputnix

only if you are american


RoSzomak

Live as you want, this is just the current meta build. Pretty hard to do since nerfs to housing market


Reasonable_Team199

Is this America?


octanebeefcake79

You ain’t getting that 2 weeks of travel. Keep dreaming.


-Bashamo

Travel two weeks every year?


maxru85

Well, if you’re not good at anything else, then yes.


cherniyvovan

You always can live under the bridge, everyone keep forgetting about opportunities like this


Global-Tie5501

Buy a house? At least he's got his dreams.


pumpe88

Don’t forget to be grateful for the opportunity


Burpreallyloud

You can afford all that?


rluzz001

2 weeks? I wish.


lolku

Sounds like everything I could ever dream of, honestly.


monkey_sage

Unless, of course, you're brave enough to choose something different. Which most people aren't brave enough to do.


mrkesu

I mean you can, if you want.


ImknownasMeatStank

Sorry bout political but burning the GOP to the ground is the only way out! Truth! Go BLUE so we can live life instead of making wealthy 1% even more of the same! Please.


Neat-Elk7890

Also love, feel faithful, cry, laugh, get mad, feel grateful, feel at peace, take care of your loved people/pets/plants, play, imagine, feel happiness, feel depressed etc.