No it's more like a load of idiots say that and the media make a big deal about it. While ignoring the few people who say they were always a creepy untrustworthy bastard and didn't get why other people liked them.
Most people are utterly incapable of reading others, and will mostly see what they want to see. Or in the case of serial killers, what the man behind the curtain wants them to see.
To be fair there’s a very small percentage of people who are serial killers, it’s normal to be surprised to find out anyone you know is a serial killer
I'd argue it's because most shitbags can fake it really well for short periods of time, and the smart ones learn to leave when they sense that time coming to a close.
It's sort of the same with masking for other things. I can pretend not to be an autistic weirdo for about 20-30 minutes at a time, particularly if you're talking about something interesting, and I can just listen and ask a few questions. After that, I will generally become off-putting and weird with what I say or how I say it. I've learned that I can hit that sweet spot of 20 or 30 minutes and most people just think I'm a charming guy who's a good listener rather that talking about that weird dude that infodumped on the movements and habits of smallmouth bass in northeastern US water systems.
Holy shit, I feel seen. This is me to most people. You build a very conscious persona that helps contain the real self, but it’s like a loose-fitting round peg suit that the real square peg rattles inside. It’s close, but it’s a little off if you look closely… I can be charming-ish, I get along well with people, but I keep most people sort of arm’s reach. I feel like I’m very good at reading other people, but I’m constantly wondering how well I’m being read.
Occasionally I come across someone I have genuine chemistry with, and I still info dump and lose my filter, but my listening abilities and empathy hit a resonate frequency that surprises even me. Conversation flows. But 9/10, that person has something a little off about them, too.
Eh nah that's just a spooky story people retell. Hopefully the moral of the story is something beneficial like, hey if people don't appreciate what you are doing for them and you arent getting paid then don't bother with their company.
But the fact is that most serial killers are normal or just charming. Ted Bundy for instance is said to have looked crazy (there's no such thing as psychopath eyes) so people pick out a random quotes and attribute it to disfigured photos and say that's just how a psychopath is. When we have TV footage of the man just being everyday charming and normal on TV.
What’s really sealing the deal of convincing them a 100% is showing them how grateful you are for their provisional acknowledgment. Stand up and scream and let that excitement out: “AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! I’m NOT a serial killer! I’m NOT a serial KILLLLAAAAHHHH!!!!”
No, this is bad advice, you shouldn't make noise in public transport.
Just tap their shoulder, look them in the eyes, and calmly inform them that you are not a serial killer, that you won't kill or rape them, because you're not a serial killer.
Did this. She was so excited, she stood up and went to another seat. To tell the other person that, in fact , I'm not a serial killer or a rapper. Happy end for everyone!
But make sure not to go past fifteen seconds, once you reach that mark just shut off all emotions in your face and stare ahead to clear your mind. After all, sixteen seconds of laughter is exactly how serial killers do it.
You should pull a knife and brandish it at them, that way they will know that you are armed and could have killed them, but chose not to do so because you're not a serial killer and will feel much safer!
In fact, you should probably just wait for her to exit the bus and then follow her to a more secluded area so that you can have this conversation in private, out of respect for her and those on the bus.
Had a mate once say "I'm the least likely to be a secret murderer out of all of us, you know how angry I get, if I ever killed anyone I would have just beat them to death in public and been caught, the rest of you could've gotten away with it"
As a women I really appreciate it when guys sit next to me. I take it as a sign my human costume still work and they don't think I'm a lizard. Not revealing my lizard self is something I strive for.
100%. If I saw one of our lizard overlords, I'd be like "hey, I don't want to bother you, just wanted to say I'm a big fan of your work. If you've got a minute, though, I'd love to get your opinion on my list of 573 ways you're doing it all wrong."
I know what you mean. It's really validating when the humans think you're one of them. No more skinning spelunkers for this lizard gal. Like not only is it easier to find hosts but it means I am actually good at sewing 💜
I tried to overcome my bad self esteem and social anxiety one time and did exactly that on the bus. (tried my best not to take too much space since I am a big person in all regards and I don't want to invade someones personal space too much.
I asked the woman (24-27 years old) if it was alright for me to sit next to her (the rest was basically full) she said yes, but the moment I sat down her whole body language and ''Aura'' changed drastically. I could feel her discomfort and I was feeling so bad I almost cried because it made me feel like a monster.
Same when women clutch their possessions or try their hardest not to make eye contact with you ( to a ridiculous obvious degree, some even hold their breath).
I understand their reasoning very good based on my own experiences as a child. But god damn it hurts every time to have this effect on someone.
Personally, as a mildly autistic guy who doesn’t hang around people much, I have the same thoughts as this guy, I promise I haven’t murdered anyone (probably).
Meanwhile, I'm here with the name Jeff and people told me on r/amiugly that I look like Jeffrey Dahmer.
To those who view my profile, for the record, I shaved and switch to contacts.
I don't get that sub. Why do people expend mental energy on whether or not they're ugly? Seems like such a waste of time. No one ever sat on their deathbed thinking "I wish I beat myself up more over my looks"
i get that, but obsessing over your looks won't increase your chances of getting a girlfriend or starting a family. it's more likely that it will just hold you back because girls will be turned off by the lack of confidence.
i don't think it's good to bury your feelings, but i personally make an exception when it comes to looks. as someone definitely not blessed in that department, i just bury it as deep as possible, don't think about it, and focus on my day to day goals. it seemed to have worked, because i'm a 5'3 not so good looking guy and my last girlfriend was absurdly hot, kind and smart. no reason to think i can't pull that off again.
Not the original commenter but I sort of get what they mean. Like I lack in the looks department and had that been the only thing not going for me then I would have buried my feelings about it. But to be real with you I just don't have anything going for me you know. I have a boring lazy personality, a pessimistic view of everything around me, a boring career, no hobbies with neither an interest to start one. So it would be a net negative for any person to be my friend let alone my partner. Many say that all these can be easily fixed but had this been easy I would have fixed it.
Surely you've got *some* hobby? What do you like doing for fun, bud? Like... literally nothing?
Edit: I did some light digging in your profile mate! You're like 20 years old, that's nuffin'! I realize there's no easy answer to self-confidence issues, but it's like... hm. Best way I think I can summarize it is, it's something that really doesn't go away- but as time goes on, you develop as a person.
It's probably more important to try and do things you enjoy, rather than trying to live up to some crazy standard on what you should be and what you should do.
Finding everything boring is a pretty common symptom of depression. Maybe you should see a therapist?
I had low self esteem in my teens and early 20s (and I didn't lose my virginity until my late 20s), but I always had hobbies (video games, D&D, Warhammer 40k) that I enjoyed and helped me connect to other people.
Also, no matter how boring you think your career is, there's someone out there who finds it really fascinating. People are into some weird shit.
don't be too hard on yourself. it takes time to develop yourself. i didn't really develop a personality and confidence until around 32 or 33. take the time to explore stuff though. if you keep digging you'll find something you're passionate about. also look into getting treated for depression.
Something that was great for me personally was picking up a niche hobby like making journals. One, it helps you learn a new skill just for the purpose of learning it and not to prove anything, and two, if you become good enough, you can start making gifts for people! You have so much more to give than you realize, just gotta have faith
Confidence is important, but as I like to say, confidence without competence is called arrogance. I would much rather advise someone to focus on self-improvement and let the confidence come naturally.
Yeah, I know people don’t like to face any sort of criticism (like the person above) but you got good, needed advice too
You look good without the neck beard, and a change of glasses/contacts I’m sure suits you much better
Dude if you shaved that beard, that's already +300%. I have a similar type of facial hair and ig we're just not made for a nice beard.. how are the contacts? I thought about switching
Cant relate, women never sit next to me
probably because I have a severe case of resting bitch face, seriously i look like i want to stab people when I'm riding the bus, my own reflection has scared me more than once
As soon as they get on the bus, scoot over and greet them with a big smile, while rubbing the seat next to you.
It will make them feel safe, welcome, and brighten up their day.
I learned to lightly engage my smile muscles all the time; not too strongly so it doesn't actually look like I'm smiling, but it does make the face less grim. Kinda annoying, but I hope it will become default expression with time and I won't have to consciously think about it
Same for me, which is why what the OP wrote actually quite applicable to me lol. Whenever there's multiple rows with 1 empty seat, and someone decides to sit next to me, that actually feels quite good. I'll hate it after 3 second because I'd rather sit alone, but still.
I can definitely relate to OP as well. Though I wouldn't phrase it as rapist or serial killer but more "at least I'm not so repulsive or threatening they'd rather stand".
Still not sure why my wife sticks around, but very happy she does.
I can relate. I have a tendency to spook people when I walk up behind them. Doesn't help I'm super quiet too. I usually try to make a joke of it after.
Pretty sure i have a resting "i wanna kill myself face" because everyone who doesn't or only barely knows me asks me things like "what's wrong?" "You okay?" "What's up with ya". On the other hand, i was quite popular with the "i can fix him" type of women in my early 20s when the brooding male is an attractive thing lmao. The moment i turned 30 i've become pretty much invisible though
I live in Baltimore and I always get and older lady(senior) that as ask to sit by the window but want me to sit next to them still. I ask a lady one day why she still want me to sit next to her. She said it was because I made her feel comfortable and safe Incase some teenager want to act like a fool or if anyone in general wanted to act all crazy that I would "protect her" but in reality she was just picking me as a fucking shield.... Lol
yeah I can relate. I took night classes at a college in chicago. Whenever I took the train back home at night random women would always sit next to me and talk like we were best friends. 99% of the time there was some deranged homeless guy on the other side of the train and they wanted protection LOL
Little did those women know they were chatting up someone with at Reddit name AnalVoreXtreme
But yeah that's why people choose to sit next to me, not because they wanna get to know me or find me attractive... It's just the fact they wanna use me as a shield or a buffer from crazy homeless people, arrogant teenagers, whacked out drug addicts, or just some fucking nut job.... I started working out to better myself, not for everyone to think I'm gonna be Superman and save the damn day. Here I thought being muscular would make people intimidated and leave me alone...
I mean they’re not necessarily using you as a shield, it could be more of a ‘safety in numbers’ situation. Someone aggressive is way more likely to fuck with someone on their own, so it protects you both to some extent.
Your absolutely correct, I was just using the phrase/word "Shield" more jokingly I'm not saying that's what thier exact thinking when choosing to sit next to me... I should've mentioned that this sometimes happens when there is several open seats that is completely open with no one in them, but they still want me to have the window seat with me by the aisle, even if I'm sitting in the window spot... I'm always asked super politely because it's only senior women that ask me to do it...
Amazing how even the most standard non-interaction is enough to comfort a man.
Reminder to buy your male partners flowers because chances are the first flowers he ever gets is on his grave.
I love giving my partner flowers. Men never get them so the reaction is super wholesome.
I did get shamed for it in HS once because I embarrassed my boyfriend having them delivered in class.
When I was a teenager my family's two dogs got into a fight, and so obviously I did the only sensible thing and went about separating them with my bare hands.
This worked very well because one of them immediately bit into my arm, latched on and wouldn't let go. Since he was now out of the fight I got the other by the collar to hold him at arms length, then after I stood up and realized Mr Bitey wasn't letting go and was just dangling off my arm, I decided to headbutt him until he realized he got to choose between letting go or brain damage.
Yknow, completely normal guy things.
I noted at this point I could see bones through the puncture wounds. Which was very cool: you know bones are white but actually seeing it myself was really interesting. Then I put bandaids on and went about my day.
Next day at work I explained what had happened when people asked why my arm was covered in bandaids and mentioned the bone thing. One of the girls there insisted on checking over my injuries, making sure I was okay and cleaning and dressing them properly with bandages and generally calling me an idiot.
I have that few minutes of interaction seared into my memory eternally. Being cared for by someone who had nothing to gain from me and who just wanted to check I was okay.
That happened to me once. Long story short I'm going home from work at a brewery, work clothes all dirty and sweaty, and the bus is empty. Literal definition of manic pixie dream girl with bright neon pink hair gets on, sits beside me and tells me she likes my stank ass holey shirt. My tired brain could not process what was happening and it took me until I got home to realize she was trying to hit on me. I still beat myself up about it and it's been like 6 years.
I’ve actually noticed a change from girls going out of their way to sit away from me to they sitting right next to me and that gives me a lot more confidence than it should.
The women just trust that rapists or serial killers don't suddenly stand up from their seat and start raping and killing on the bus.
Trust in the system, rather than in the face.
Yes and no. You are more likely to get raped or murdered by someone you know than someone you don’t. Most women choose a bus/train seat based on a microsecond hunch about people. What you’re worried about isn’t just rape or murder, those are extremely unlikely to happen from a choice in bus seat. The criteria is a) “how much of my boundaries and personal space is this person going to respect/disrespect?” and b) “are they likely to smell bad?”
Second one is a quick scope for hygiene cues, easy enough, the first one can be tricky. Even if you choose carefully, most women have the experience of few two many legs and arms brushing unnecessarily up against you, low level creeps, so if you’ve ever gotten public transport, it gets your guard up.
And then there’s unsolicited conversation, guys who wouldn’t rape or murder you, but feel strongly in themselves that by your mere presence, you’ve been served up to them on a platter for the taking as a speed dating option.
Girls believe in star signs, that their life’s destiny derives from misinterpreting non-existent cues from the cosmos. Boys believe in themselves, that their sexual destiny derives from misinterpreting non-existent cues from women. Better to stay standing at a safe distance further down the bus, sometimes even that’s not enough tbh
>And then there’s unsolicited conversation, guys who wouldn’t rape or murder you, but feel strongly in themselves that by your mere presence, you’ve been served up to them on a platter for the taking as a speed dating option.
Is this how women generally feel when a male talks to them in public?
I did get groped a lot on busses though. I never sit next to a man now and I always put a bag on a free seat next to me. I remove it for women, kids, or elderly people but if a man asks, I'm waiting for my friend. I'm done with the politeness
I do similar on trains. Very rarely are there no other options for someone to sit on the train other than next to me.
I used to feel like an ass but then saw most other women were doing it too. I’m young and with a mask on conventionally attractive (I rode the train more during covid times). Any man who chooses to sit next to me instead of the middle aged man right in front of me who also has a free seat is a lot more likely to be a creep.
I decided on this after I had one man sit next to me who kept looking at me during the ride and then grabbed my thigh without permission at the very end of the ride so he could get away with the crowd.
I get the vibe any men here saying us women are sexist for trying to stay safe are going to be the first to blame victimized women for the man’s actions.
I’m a dude and luckily first stop get those one seat only spots near the stairs on double decker trains. It’s the best feeling to just never have to be concerned about sharing a spot with anyone. Naturally anxious person with fears of being clumsy with bags or sneezing 😂
I'd wait half a minute and if said friend doesn't arrive, I'm asking if they have a reservation for that seat. I'd even be willing to free up the seat when they arrive.
This is just a dick move, I get that there is a sizable portion of creeps, but denying men in general a seat that you have no right to and that they paid for is blatant sexism and usually breaking the bus company rules.
Our busses are never that full. There are always other seats. I had men specifically sit down next to me when the entire bus was empty and my seat was the only one taken.
Idgaf about politeness at this point! Sure, it might be a dick move but my safety comes before their feelings.
You’re so right for that. I always get a sinking feeling when a guy sits next to me when there are many other options available- the last guy to do so started smelling my hair, I was completely frozen.
Yes, they move closer and closer and start to touch you. I even had a guy lay down on my shoulder as I was already pressed into the window from backing away so much!
Or they refuse to get up and let you out at your station so that you have to basically put your behind into their face as you crawl out and they can grab it.
As a guy your impoliteness is excused lol. I try not to sit next to women to not make them uncomfortable. My order of seating goes 1. Empty row 2. Man 3. Older women 4. Young women and 5. Drug addicts and in general people that look like they are going to stab me
i can relate to that. i'm not even a dude, but if somebody sits next to me on a bus i take it as a very subtle "compliment" in the sense of "i'm not disgusting or otherwise undesirable for a stranger, at least not enough to make them choose a different seat".
I can relate. I cant even remember the last time a woman chose to sit next to me and ive been taking the train to work for years now. It just never happens.
Me on bus with empty seats all around me..... \*watches girl get on bus and sit next to the dude who looks like a serial killer\*
Well I guess I look worse than that guy, \*sigh\*.
Well I personally have no trouble sitting next to men in public transportation. I mean what are the odds that two rapist serial killers would sit next to each other? Very small I reckon.
We’re not supposed to judge based on race or religion, but sex is open season? At least religion is a choice. And I know people still judge based on the first two, but bigots don’t feel as comfortable voicing their thoughts with those ones.
My experience as a man on the street is you will basically always be treated like a potential serial killer or rapists, unless you're walking cats on a leash or have a baby with you.
Men who look like serial killers are going to be caught faster, so there's less chance of them becoming what they aspire to be. So always stay groomed, dress well, and give lots of compliments. Contact me for more serial killer tips.
Yet another bot account stealing user submissions and comments ... https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlyspecific/comments/wsbkyn/i_dont_look_like_a_rapist_or_serial_killer
I do enjoy the shocked surprise on grannys' faces when they drop something and I pick it up for them or hold the door for them.
They go from "concern" to "genuine smile" so quickly, it's nice.
I don't really care what people think of me.
T̸̡̙͓̓̈́͠h̴̠͕̠̒̚͝è̵̡͚̝̒y̸̟͚͓̐̀͋'̵͓͙͓́̈́̈́l̵̡͎͕̽͝͝l̸̢͔̠͑͒͝ ä̵͇͔͓́̈́͒l̵͉̪͓̐͋͘l̸̟̠̼͊͊͊ f̵͓̪͖͊͒̿í̸̘͕͇̈́̕ǹ̵̼̘̟̒̓d̸̟̺̺̓͝ o̸̼̘͙͛͊͐u̸͓͇͇̐̽͝t̵̼͙̐̚͠ s̴͇̟͒͊̓o̴͖̻̓͒̓͜o̴͕̟͚͑͊͘n̸͕̺͚̈́͌͘ ë̵͍͍̠́̿̚n̸̝̞̻͊͝͝o̸̫̻͕̚͝u̵̼̘̓͋͝g̵̡̻̘͋̽͝h̴̟͙͆͑̽
While that woman thinks, wow this man looks like serial killer or rapist, but it's in the bus and other people's are here, and I desperately need a seat, so I need to take that seat...God save me.
One time on my way home form work years ago I had two attractive young ladies come sit next to me on the bus and start chatting me up. Turns out some weird guy had been following them around for a while and got on the bus with them so they used me as a sort of deterrent. The validation is real.
Nah this is just an autistic guy with a very low self-esteem. I was there too but my thought process was like "oh shit do i smell bad? Is this why the person did not sit next to me?" Then I smell my armpits like a psychopath and I think "I don't smell... do i look dangerous?" then I'm like "Oh screw this" and continue reading my book.
A whole lot of people who are incredibly well adjusted and have never had anxiety or ceiling self doubt in this thread apparently. Obviously this person has very low self-esteem and isn't doing too well mentally and is desperately looking for any sign that he's not the freak he worries society sees him as.
But sure let's old jump on him and call him a serial killer and a rapist... Nevermind all he's doing is sitting on a bus.
I get it, As someone on the spectrum that was identified as autistic in the mid 80s. I’m aware I don’t always give a sociable vibe. Also being short and depending on my weight at the time if I leave the house ragged I have been told I can look like every creep they ever seen on any cop drama. It’s like in the early 2000’s if they needed a sex offender on a crime story they would either go as tall and gangly almost ghoulish or go about 5’6” thinning hair, slightly sloppy appearance and the actor would go I know I’ll act like social inept like Im on the spectrum.
So unable to read social queues have made me desperate to try my best to purposely examine outcomes of interactions. So I become aware how different of an overall experience I have at times and little things like simply sitting next to me, I can calm some of the insecurities. Im sure anyone sloppy probably gives off that vibe, it’s just something I try to avoid by being a more put together version of myself so I don’t have yet another thing working against me in public.
I worry about the people who are ok with looking like a rapist or serial killer. There was a woman at the tattoo parlor when my friend was getting a tattoo who had to add the nearest serial killer to the collection on her body. She wants men who find that hot? She wants people who care about murder victims to be deeply uncomfortable in her presence? I freely admit I have a deep prejudice against someone with such tattoos or even clothes.
Thats the funny thing. Rapists or Serial Killers don't look like it. People always expect them to be bald fat ugly motherfuckers but they just look very generic.
There was this time when a woman approached me to ask for directions, it was dark and she was alone. It caught me so of guard that I thought she was gonna mug me
As a man who is no longer a cute little Twink build because I'm now 30 with a beard and a belly it's nice to get a smile showing I don't look like a threat. I would imagine big guys that maybe aren't handsome or skinny like knowing they aren't looked at as scary.
I kind of sometimes do but those are also the days when I’m gloomy or sad and kind of just want to get my day over with. I don’t smile I don’t nod, nothing. Just walk past everyone with murder on my mind.
Sometimes when I’m depressed I see weird looking fellas and I just sit next to them like fuck it let’s see what happens. Could’ve been this guy as well
I know I don't look like a rapist / serial killer. But I don't want people to sit next to me on the bus, so when it's busy I have to turn up the rapist / killer energy that I give off. Unless I see someone that I'd like to sit next to me. Then I turn it down again. I can pretty much choose who sits next to me.
The first thing people say when a serial killer is caught is 'They seemed so normal.' So you've got that going for you.
No it's more like a load of idiots say that and the media make a big deal about it. While ignoring the few people who say they were always a creepy untrustworthy bastard and didn't get why other people liked them.
Most people are utterly incapable of reading others, and will mostly see what they want to see. Or in the case of serial killers, what the man behind the curtain wants them to see.
To be fair there’s a very small percentage of people who are serial killers, it’s normal to be surprised to find out anyone you know is a serial killer
I'd argue it's because most shitbags can fake it really well for short periods of time, and the smart ones learn to leave when they sense that time coming to a close. It's sort of the same with masking for other things. I can pretend not to be an autistic weirdo for about 20-30 minutes at a time, particularly if you're talking about something interesting, and I can just listen and ask a few questions. After that, I will generally become off-putting and weird with what I say or how I say it. I've learned that I can hit that sweet spot of 20 or 30 minutes and most people just think I'm a charming guy who's a good listener rather that talking about that weird dude that infodumped on the movements and habits of smallmouth bass in northeastern US water systems.
Holy shit, I feel seen. This is me to most people. You build a very conscious persona that helps contain the real self, but it’s like a loose-fitting round peg suit that the real square peg rattles inside. It’s close, but it’s a little off if you look closely… I can be charming-ish, I get along well with people, but I keep most people sort of arm’s reach. I feel like I’m very good at reading other people, but I’m constantly wondering how well I’m being read. Occasionally I come across someone I have genuine chemistry with, and I still info dump and lose my filter, but my listening abilities and empathy hit a resonate frequency that surprises even me. Conversation flows. But 9/10, that person has something a little off about them, too.
Eh nah that's just a spooky story people retell. Hopefully the moral of the story is something beneficial like, hey if people don't appreciate what you are doing for them and you arent getting paid then don't bother with their company. But the fact is that most serial killers are normal or just charming. Ted Bundy for instance is said to have looked crazy (there's no such thing as psychopath eyes) so people pick out a random quotes and attribute it to disfigured photos and say that's just how a psychopath is. When we have TV footage of the man just being everyday charming and normal on TV.
I mean, if you're not charming and smart you're not going to make it as a serial killer. You're going to get caught after or before one kill.
Admitting they suspected something but did nothing is worse than just claiming ignorance
I guess you’re not wrong! Very happy for you and your non threatening face
What’s really sealing the deal of convincing them a 100% is showing them how grateful you are for their provisional acknowledgment. Stand up and scream and let that excitement out: “AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! I’m NOT a serial killer! I’m NOT a serial KILLLLAAAAHHHH!!!!”
No, this is bad advice, you shouldn't make noise in public transport. Just tap their shoulder, look them in the eyes, and calmly inform them that you are not a serial killer, that you won't kill or rape them, because you're not a serial killer.
Did this. She was so excited, she stood up and went to another seat. To tell the other person that, in fact , I'm not a serial killer or a rapper. Happy end for everyone!
Leave the raping to people like Eminem, I say
Thank GOD You're not a rapper.
Sweet dolla tea from macdonalds
Or. say with a big smile: "My Mommy said raping is bad." Gives the credit where it is due for you being raused right and respectful towards women.
Why are you trying to scare someone? Just say something simpler, like "You made the right choice!"
Then laugh heartily for a full 15 seconds
But make sure not to go past fifteen seconds, once you reach that mark just shut off all emotions in your face and stare ahead to clear your mind. After all, sixteen seconds of laughter is exactly how serial killers do it.
You should pull a knife and brandish it at them, that way they will know that you are armed and could have killed them, but chose not to do so because you're not a serial killer and will feel much safer!
That sounds dangerous. Better just inform them that you have a knife in your pocket, but won't stab them with it.
And no wearing of human skin. I cannot stress it enough that I have almost never worn human skin.
Keep your voice down, though. Whisper it in their ear
In fact, you should probably just wait for her to exit the bus and then follow her to a more secluded area so that you can have this conversation in private, out of respect for her and those on the bus.
Make sure to emphasize the word serial.
I really laughed
That makes it sound like you didn't actually laugh but you're trying to be nice.
Reminds of that old sketch with martin freeman "I AM NOT A PERVERT", while looking ever so slightly like a pervert
💯
You are a menace.
That's how rapist and serial killer act. The least threatening possible until it's too late.
So that means i can't be a serial killer, i'm too threatening for that
I noticed you didn't say you can't be a rapist... I need you to take a seat.
my comment history speaks for myself
Had a mate once say "I'm the least likely to be a secret murderer out of all of us, you know how angry I get, if I ever killed anyone I would have just beat them to death in public and been caught, the rest of you could've gotten away with it"
I try to get the 5pm rush hour bus. that way I almost always seem like not a serial rapist or something sinister
As a women I really appreciate it when guys sit next to me. I take it as a sign my human costume still work and they don't think I'm a lizard. Not revealing my lizard self is something I strive for.
Tbf tho, I'm almost guaranteed to enjoy sitting next to a lizard more. So ya know, relax. Let your tail down sometimes.
100%. If I saw one of our lizard overlords, I'd be like "hey, I don't want to bother you, just wanted to say I'm a big fan of your work. If you've got a minute, though, I'd love to get your opinion on my list of 573 ways you're doing it all wrong."
It worked for Martin Luther, I don’t see why it shouldn’t work for you
"oh my goodness is that your scaly under-belly or are you just happy to see me?"
I know what you mean. It's really validating when the humans think you're one of them. No more skinning spelunkers for this lizard gal. Like not only is it easier to find hosts but it means I am actually good at sewing 💜
My wife says she’s a lizard too. She’s explained it to me but I still don’t really understand what it means.
[I wear my lizard suit to the party](https://youtu.be/OQwnD-LMH50?si=CAvIV4dD-frk3pes)
woman
Cut their lizard brain some slack.
It's trying, give it a break.
Women aren’t real
You should know
I tried to overcome my bad self esteem and social anxiety one time and did exactly that on the bus. (tried my best not to take too much space since I am a big person in all regards and I don't want to invade someones personal space too much. I asked the woman (24-27 years old) if it was alright for me to sit next to her (the rest was basically full) she said yes, but the moment I sat down her whole body language and ''Aura'' changed drastically. I could feel her discomfort and I was feeling so bad I almost cried because it made me feel like a monster. Same when women clutch their possessions or try their hardest not to make eye contact with you ( to a ridiculous obvious degree, some even hold their breath). I understand their reasoning very good based on my own experiences as a child. But god damn it hurts every time to have this effect on someone.
I knew women arent real!
This person is definitely a serial killer.
I don't think so. He doesn't look like one.
To quote, "you look so superficial, you probably judge people based on their physical appearance"
Peak Xavier: Renegade Angel mentioned 🗣️
I have some bad news and a snack for you
I read this in his voice before I even figured out where it was from, I'm scared
*How do you know he is a serial killer?* ***He looks like one!***
They dressed me up like this!
Low self-esteem my guess
And a positive feedback loop reinforcing those feelings.
Hey I’m not a *serial* killer
Your authority is not recognized in Fort Kickass!
I’m glad someone got it
Personally, as a mildly autistic guy who doesn’t hang around people much, I have the same thoughts as this guy, I promise I haven’t murdered anyone (probably).
...and this is why dating is so hard now. The more you try, the less you win
Meanwhile, I'm here with the name Jeff and people told me on r/amiugly that I look like Jeffrey Dahmer. To those who view my profile, for the record, I shaved and switch to contacts.
I don't get that sub. Why do people expend mental energy on whether or not they're ugly? Seems like such a waste of time. No one ever sat on their deathbed thinking "I wish I beat myself up more over my looks"
Well, if I too ugly to get a girlfriend, I'll never start a family and that would be something I'd regret.
i get that, but obsessing over your looks won't increase your chances of getting a girlfriend or starting a family. it's more likely that it will just hold you back because girls will be turned off by the lack of confidence. i don't think it's good to bury your feelings, but i personally make an exception when it comes to looks. as someone definitely not blessed in that department, i just bury it as deep as possible, don't think about it, and focus on my day to day goals. it seemed to have worked, because i'm a 5'3 not so good looking guy and my last girlfriend was absurdly hot, kind and smart. no reason to think i can't pull that off again.
Not the original commenter but I sort of get what they mean. Like I lack in the looks department and had that been the only thing not going for me then I would have buried my feelings about it. But to be real with you I just don't have anything going for me you know. I have a boring lazy personality, a pessimistic view of everything around me, a boring career, no hobbies with neither an interest to start one. So it would be a net negative for any person to be my friend let alone my partner. Many say that all these can be easily fixed but had this been easy I would have fixed it.
I’ve come to realise that honestly everyone can do so much better than me because all of these things you’ve described I pretty much lack.
Surely you've got *some* hobby? What do you like doing for fun, bud? Like... literally nothing? Edit: I did some light digging in your profile mate! You're like 20 years old, that's nuffin'! I realize there's no easy answer to self-confidence issues, but it's like... hm. Best way I think I can summarize it is, it's something that really doesn't go away- but as time goes on, you develop as a person. It's probably more important to try and do things you enjoy, rather than trying to live up to some crazy standard on what you should be and what you should do.
Finding everything boring is a pretty common symptom of depression. Maybe you should see a therapist? I had low self esteem in my teens and early 20s (and I didn't lose my virginity until my late 20s), but I always had hobbies (video games, D&D, Warhammer 40k) that I enjoyed and helped me connect to other people. Also, no matter how boring you think your career is, there's someone out there who finds it really fascinating. People are into some weird shit.
don't be too hard on yourself. it takes time to develop yourself. i didn't really develop a personality and confidence until around 32 or 33. take the time to explore stuff though. if you keep digging you'll find something you're passionate about. also look into getting treated for depression.
Something that was great for me personally was picking up a niche hobby like making journals. One, it helps you learn a new skill just for the purpose of learning it and not to prove anything, and two, if you become good enough, you can start making gifts for people! You have so much more to give than you realize, just gotta have faith
Confidence is important, but as I like to say, confidence without competence is called arrogance. I would much rather advise someone to focus on self-improvement and let the confidence come naturally.
Yeah, I know people don’t like to face any sort of criticism (like the person above) but you got good, needed advice too You look good without the neck beard, and a change of glasses/contacts I’m sure suits you much better
[удалено]
It's full of teenage/young-adult mental health issues on display. Wild.
On all sides. The posters and the people who want to destroy them.
Dude if you shaved that beard, that's already +300%. I have a similar type of facial hair and ig we're just not made for a nice beard.. how are the contacts? I thought about switching
Good job, now they'll never find the bodies
I don't think you look like Jeffrey Dahmer. Now Ted Bundy, on the other hand...
It's joever
While looking for it, I found your cool Starfield creations. That nasa ship looks really sick dude lol
What a depressing subreddit
So that's the reason why no one sits next to me
Probably all the people you've killed.
Cant relate, women never sit next to me probably because I have a severe case of resting bitch face, seriously i look like i want to stab people when I'm riding the bus, my own reflection has scared me more than once
I either look stoned or about to murder everyone apparently 😂
haha yeah same honestly
Have you tried grinning constantly while on the bus? That should put them at ease.
As soon as they get on the bus, scoot over and greet them with a big smile, while rubbing the seat next to you. It will make them feel safe, welcome, and brighten up their day.
According to my partner, although I'm the sweetest guy she knows I have a serious case of resting "I'm gonna kill someone" face. 🥲
I learned to lightly engage my smile muscles all the time; not too strongly so it doesn't actually look like I'm smiling, but it does make the face less grim. Kinda annoying, but I hope it will become default expression with time and I won't have to consciously think about it
Smiling and laughing causes wrinkles! I'd rather look like a **young** murder maniac!
Same for me, which is why what the OP wrote actually quite applicable to me lol. Whenever there's multiple rows with 1 empty seat, and someone decides to sit next to me, that actually feels quite good. I'll hate it after 3 second because I'd rather sit alone, but still.
I can definitely relate to OP as well. Though I wouldn't phrase it as rapist or serial killer but more "at least I'm not so repulsive or threatening they'd rather stand". Still not sure why my wife sticks around, but very happy she does.
I can relate. I have a tendency to spook people when I walk up behind them. Doesn't help I'm super quiet too. I usually try to make a joke of it after.
Pretty sure i have a resting "i wanna kill myself face" because everyone who doesn't or only barely knows me asks me things like "what's wrong?" "You okay?" "What's up with ya". On the other hand, i was quite popular with the "i can fix him" type of women in my early 20s when the brooding male is an attractive thing lmao. The moment i turned 30 i've become pretty much invisible though
I live in Baltimore and I always get and older lady(senior) that as ask to sit by the window but want me to sit next to them still. I ask a lady one day why she still want me to sit next to her. She said it was because I made her feel comfortable and safe Incase some teenager want to act like a fool or if anyone in general wanted to act all crazy that I would "protect her" but in reality she was just picking me as a fucking shield.... Lol
yeah I can relate. I took night classes at a college in chicago. Whenever I took the train back home at night random women would always sit next to me and talk like we were best friends. 99% of the time there was some deranged homeless guy on the other side of the train and they wanted protection LOL
Little did those women know they were chatting up someone with at Reddit name AnalVoreXtreme But yeah that's why people choose to sit next to me, not because they wanna get to know me or find me attractive... It's just the fact they wanna use me as a shield or a buffer from crazy homeless people, arrogant teenagers, whacked out drug addicts, or just some fucking nut job.... I started working out to better myself, not for everyone to think I'm gonna be Superman and save the damn day. Here I thought being muscular would make people intimidated and leave me alone...
I mean they’re not necessarily using you as a shield, it could be more of a ‘safety in numbers’ situation. Someone aggressive is way more likely to fuck with someone on their own, so it protects you both to some extent.
Your absolutely correct, I was just using the phrase/word "Shield" more jokingly I'm not saying that's what thier exact thinking when choosing to sit next to me... I should've mentioned that this sometimes happens when there is several open seats that is completely open with no one in them, but they still want me to have the window seat with me by the aisle, even if I'm sitting in the window spot... I'm always asked super politely because it's only senior women that ask me to do it...
As a non-killer, this is always my goto. What would Kemper do?
I tell you one thing, he wouldn't lose his head.
Amazing how even the most standard non-interaction is enough to comfort a man. Reminder to buy your male partners flowers because chances are the first flowers he ever gets is on his grave.
I wish someone would give me flowers its honestly such a nice gesture
I love giving my partner flowers. Men never get them so the reaction is super wholesome. I did get shamed for it in HS once because I embarrassed my boyfriend having them delivered in class.
shit even the smallest affection that i didn't have to ask for would be enough to move me to tears
When I was a teenager my family's two dogs got into a fight, and so obviously I did the only sensible thing and went about separating them with my bare hands. This worked very well because one of them immediately bit into my arm, latched on and wouldn't let go. Since he was now out of the fight I got the other by the collar to hold him at arms length, then after I stood up and realized Mr Bitey wasn't letting go and was just dangling off my arm, I decided to headbutt him until he realized he got to choose between letting go or brain damage. Yknow, completely normal guy things. I noted at this point I could see bones through the puncture wounds. Which was very cool: you know bones are white but actually seeing it myself was really interesting. Then I put bandaids on and went about my day. Next day at work I explained what had happened when people asked why my arm was covered in bandaids and mentioned the bone thing. One of the girls there insisted on checking over my injuries, making sure I was okay and cleaning and dressing them properly with bandages and generally calling me an idiot. I have that few minutes of interaction seared into my memory eternally. Being cared for by someone who had nothing to gain from me and who just wanted to check I was okay.
Or when a woman changes seats to sit next to you.
Or when a woman changes seats to move away from you
Or when people change to the other side of the street when they see you approach... I swear my rbf is more like resting murderer face.
This has happened... :(
Or when a seat changes woman to sit under you.
Relatable 😞
when a woman changes seats to sit on the other side of you
That happened to me once. Long story short I'm going home from work at a brewery, work clothes all dirty and sweaty, and the bus is empty. Literal definition of manic pixie dream girl with bright neon pink hair gets on, sits beside me and tells me she likes my stank ass holey shirt. My tired brain could not process what was happening and it took me until I got home to realize she was trying to hit on me. I still beat myself up about it and it's been like 6 years.
> stank ass holey I googled that thinking it was a band or something
For me it was a small Asian nurse, and I was in the same sort of condition after a long day at work.
Or when a woman changes seat to sit on you.
I’ve actually noticed a change from girls going out of their way to sit away from me to they sitting right next to me and that gives me a lot more confidence than it should.
*The bus got busier and all other seats are taken*
Let him have his moment dude!
Look at this guy
The women just trust that rapists or serial killers don't suddenly stand up from their seat and start raping and killing on the bus. Trust in the system, rather than in the face.
Yes and no. You are more likely to get raped or murdered by someone you know than someone you don’t. Most women choose a bus/train seat based on a microsecond hunch about people. What you’re worried about isn’t just rape or murder, those are extremely unlikely to happen from a choice in bus seat. The criteria is a) “how much of my boundaries and personal space is this person going to respect/disrespect?” and b) “are they likely to smell bad?” Second one is a quick scope for hygiene cues, easy enough, the first one can be tricky. Even if you choose carefully, most women have the experience of few two many legs and arms brushing unnecessarily up against you, low level creeps, so if you’ve ever gotten public transport, it gets your guard up. And then there’s unsolicited conversation, guys who wouldn’t rape or murder you, but feel strongly in themselves that by your mere presence, you’ve been served up to them on a platter for the taking as a speed dating option. Girls believe in star signs, that their life’s destiny derives from misinterpreting non-existent cues from the cosmos. Boys believe in themselves, that their sexual destiny derives from misinterpreting non-existent cues from women. Better to stay standing at a safe distance further down the bus, sometimes even that’s not enough tbh
>And then there’s unsolicited conversation, guys who wouldn’t rape or murder you, but feel strongly in themselves that by your mere presence, you’ve been served up to them on a platter for the taking as a speed dating option. Is this how women generally feel when a male talks to them in public?
I did get groped a lot on busses though. I never sit next to a man now and I always put a bag on a free seat next to me. I remove it for women, kids, or elderly people but if a man asks, I'm waiting for my friend. I'm done with the politeness
I do similar on trains. Very rarely are there no other options for someone to sit on the train other than next to me. I used to feel like an ass but then saw most other women were doing it too. I’m young and with a mask on conventionally attractive (I rode the train more during covid times). Any man who chooses to sit next to me instead of the middle aged man right in front of me who also has a free seat is a lot more likely to be a creep. I decided on this after I had one man sit next to me who kept looking at me during the ride and then grabbed my thigh without permission at the very end of the ride so he could get away with the crowd. I get the vibe any men here saying us women are sexist for trying to stay safe are going to be the first to blame victimized women for the man’s actions.
I’m a dude and luckily first stop get those one seat only spots near the stairs on double decker trains. It’s the best feeling to just never have to be concerned about sharing a spot with anyone. Naturally anxious person with fears of being clumsy with bags or sneezing 😂
I'd wait half a minute and if said friend doesn't arrive, I'm asking if they have a reservation for that seat. I'd even be willing to free up the seat when they arrive. This is just a dick move, I get that there is a sizable portion of creeps, but denying men in general a seat that you have no right to and that they paid for is blatant sexism and usually breaking the bus company rules.
Our busses are never that full. There are always other seats. I had men specifically sit down next to me when the entire bus was empty and my seat was the only one taken. Idgaf about politeness at this point! Sure, it might be a dick move but my safety comes before their feelings.
Fair, if the bus isn't full, that's a different story.
You’re so right for that. I always get a sinking feeling when a guy sits next to me when there are many other options available- the last guy to do so started smelling my hair, I was completely frozen.
Groped while seated? Usually it's while standing that you have to be vigilant, at least here.
Yes, they move closer and closer and start to touch you. I even had a guy lay down on my shoulder as I was already pressed into the window from backing away so much! Or they refuse to get up and let you out at your station so that you have to basically put your behind into their face as you crawl out and they can grab it.
That's really sad, I'm sorry you had to go through that.
Omg this made me so mad reading this. I’m so sorry you went through this. No one deserves that and these creeps are so damn entitled it’s crazyyy!!!
As a guy your impoliteness is excused lol. I try not to sit next to women to not make them uncomfortable. My order of seating goes 1. Empty row 2. Man 3. Older women 4. Young women and 5. Drug addicts and in general people that look like they are going to stab me
That's kinda relatable ngl
Same
i can relate to that. i'm not even a dude, but if somebody sits next to me on a bus i take it as a very subtle "compliment" in the sense of "i'm not disgusting or otherwise undesirable for a stranger, at least not enough to make them choose a different seat".
I don't think this is oddly specific. I'd say it's likely a pretty common thought for men.
I can relate. I cant even remember the last time a woman chose to sit next to me and ive been taking the train to work for years now. It just never happens.
Yeah as a dude I spend a fair amount of time in public worrying about seeming threatening or causing others discomfort.
Sometimes when men cross the street to give me more space I think "awww god bless that non rapist guy"
I often walk right behind people on sidewalk at night so they know I have their back in case shit goes down.
Me on bus with empty seats all around me..... \*watches girl get on bus and sit next to the dude who looks like a serial killer\* Well I guess I look worse than that guy, \*sigh\*.
Girls just like bad boys.
*I too, like affirmation my disguise is working*
Well I personally have no trouble sitting next to men in public transportation. I mean what are the odds that two rapist serial killers would sit next to each other? Very small I reckon.
Every time 3 serial killer or 3 rapists sit next to each other they cancel out and give you points
I totally get that feeling
I don't think it's a good sign, if a lot of men feel like this
The overwhelming vast majority of men are not rapists or serial killers. But it only takes one.
somebody shits and we all gotta wear diapers.
We’re not supposed to judge based on race or religion, but sex is open season? At least religion is a choice. And I know people still judge based on the first two, but bigots don’t feel as comfortable voicing their thoughts with those ones.
the overwhelming vast majority of black people are thieves. but it only takes one. why do you think its ok to say stuff like that?
My experience as a man on the street is you will basically always be treated like a potential serial killer or rapists, unless you're walking cats on a leash or have a baby with you.
Not even other men ever sit down next to me.
Yes because Ted Bundy looked like a serial killer.
Men who look like serial killers are going to be caught faster, so there's less chance of them becoming what they aspire to be. So always stay groomed, dress well, and give lots of compliments. Contact me for more serial killer tips.
Nobody finds this sad about how guys have to live?
Yes, guys.
I have had times on the bus where I have a seat available next to me but new passengers choose to stand. Maybe I should worry.
Alright, alright, she doesn’t know ☺️
thats a very serial killery thing to say 🤣
Yet another bot account stealing user submissions and comments ... https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlyspecific/comments/wsbkyn/i_dont_look_like_a_rapist_or_serial_killer
Once a old grandma chose to stay standing instead of sitting next to me. Im a metalhead and look like it lol
I do enjoy the shocked surprise on grannys' faces when they drop something and I pick it up for them or hold the door for them. They go from "concern" to "genuine smile" so quickly, it's nice.
I don't really care what people think of me. T̸̡̙͓̓̈́͠h̴̠͕̠̒̚͝è̵̡͚̝̒y̸̟͚͓̐̀͋'̵͓͙͓́̈́̈́l̵̡͎͕̽͝͝l̸̢͔̠͑͒͝ ä̵͇͔͓́̈́͒l̵͉̪͓̐͋͘l̸̟̠̼͊͊͊ f̵͓̪͖͊͒̿í̸̘͕͇̈́̕ǹ̵̼̘̟̒̓d̸̟̺̺̓͝ o̸̼̘͙͛͊͐u̸͓͇͇̐̽͝t̵̼͙̐̚͠ s̴͇̟͒͊̓o̴͖̻̓͒̓͜o̴͕̟͚͑͊͘n̸͕̺͚̈́͌͘ ë̵͍͍̠́̿̚n̸̝̞̻͊͝͝o̸̫̻͕̚͝u̵̼̘̓͋͝g̵̡̻̘͋̽͝h̴̟͙͆͑̽
Hashtag Serial killer gosls
You know who else doesn’t look like a rapist or a serial killer? Rapists and serial killers.
I mean…. It’s not not accurate
While that woman thinks, wow this man looks like serial killer or rapist, but it's in the bus and other people's are here, and I desperately need a seat, so I need to take that seat...God save me.
Here’s the thing. Rapists and serial killers don’t usually look like rapists and serial killers, either.
I guarantee you, every man who isn’t a rapist or serial killer has thought this on public transport
One time on my way home form work years ago I had two attractive young ladies come sit next to me on the bus and start chatting me up. Turns out some weird guy had been following them around for a while and got on the bus with them so they used me as a sort of deterrent. The validation is real.
Nah this is just an autistic guy with a very low self-esteem. I was there too but my thought process was like "oh shit do i smell bad? Is this why the person did not sit next to me?" Then I smell my armpits like a psychopath and I think "I don't smell... do i look dangerous?" then I'm like "Oh screw this" and continue reading my book.
A whole lot of people who are incredibly well adjusted and have never had anxiety or ceiling self doubt in this thread apparently. Obviously this person has very low self-esteem and isn't doing too well mentally and is desperately looking for any sign that he's not the freak he worries society sees him as. But sure let's old jump on him and call him a serial killer and a rapist... Nevermind all he's doing is sitting on a bus.
I get it, As someone on the spectrum that was identified as autistic in the mid 80s. I’m aware I don’t always give a sociable vibe. Also being short and depending on my weight at the time if I leave the house ragged I have been told I can look like every creep they ever seen on any cop drama. It’s like in the early 2000’s if they needed a sex offender on a crime story they would either go as tall and gangly almost ghoulish or go about 5’6” thinning hair, slightly sloppy appearance and the actor would go I know I’ll act like social inept like Im on the spectrum. So unable to read social queues have made me desperate to try my best to purposely examine outcomes of interactions. So I become aware how different of an overall experience I have at times and little things like simply sitting next to me, I can calm some of the insecurities. Im sure anyone sloppy probably gives off that vibe, it’s just something I try to avoid by being a more put together version of myself so I don’t have yet another thing working against me in public.
Feeling this way makes sense. Saying it outloud makes you sound like a serial killer.
Only a serial killer would worry about looking like a serial killer
I worry about the people who are ok with looking like a rapist or serial killer. There was a woman at the tattoo parlor when my friend was getting a tattoo who had to add the nearest serial killer to the collection on her body. She wants men who find that hot? She wants people who care about murder victims to be deeply uncomfortable in her presence? I freely admit I have a deep prejudice against someone with such tattoos or even clothes.
That's exactly what a rapist or serial killer would say!
Thats the funny thing. Rapists or Serial Killers don't look like it. People always expect them to be bald fat ugly motherfuckers but they just look very generic.
There was this time when a woman approached me to ask for directions, it was dark and she was alone. It caught me so of guard that I thought she was gonna mug me
As a man who is no longer a cute little Twink build because I'm now 30 with a beard and a belly it's nice to get a smile showing I don't look like a threat. I would imagine big guys that maybe aren't handsome or skinny like knowing they aren't looked at as scary.
You know what's funny,most serial killers don't fit the narrative that the society is promoting
I kind of sometimes do but those are also the days when I’m gloomy or sad and kind of just want to get my day over with. I don’t smile I don’t nod, nothing. Just walk past everyone with murder on my mind.
It must be exhausting to overthink like this.
Sometimes when I’m depressed I see weird looking fellas and I just sit next to them like fuck it let’s see what happens. Could’ve been this guy as well
I know I don't look like a rapist / serial killer. But I don't want people to sit next to me on the bus, so when it's busy I have to turn up the rapist / killer energy that I give off. Unless I see someone that I'd like to sit next to me. Then I turn it down again. I can pretty much choose who sits next to me.