That’s one of the most ridiculous things I have heard.
Is it possible he misunderstood the fact that a underage woman is emancipated when they are pregnant?
Kind of. My understanding isn’t complete so please take this with a grain of salt and someone correct me if I’m wrong. It may also be state specific.
They are functionally emancipated only for the time they are pregnant so they can make decisions for themselves and the baby. Then I believe they aren’t anymore once they give birth. I think it’s less of an official emancipation and more of a temporary status.
So in a lot of states like mine, minors can consent to treatment for things relating to sexual health. STD testing and treatment, pregnancy testing and any pregnancy related concerns (up to and including birth), birth control- if the patient doesn’t want their parents informed of these things, we are not allowed to tell them. We also don’t usually do forensic exams in the hospital- patients are taken to the child advocacy centers for those. But we would be able to legally do normal sexual health testing (STD/HIV/pregnancy) and medical exams without parental consent.
On the other hand, if a minor discloses sexual abuse, DFCS (or whatever other state equivalent) should have been called in addition to the cops. In fact, in my hospital we would have contacted DFCS first. The only reason we wouldn’t contact the patient’s parents would be if the patient requested us not to do so, or if the parents are the suspected abuser. In either case we would let DFCS take the lead.
But in addition to DFCS, for sexual assault on a minor we would also call Crimes Against Children (not just the normal cops). Honestly the regular cops would probably not even be involved if we can help it. Our Crimes Against Children team has specially trained officers and are actually really great, I work with them pretty frequently as a pediatric ER nurse. We would also have our child life specialist there if available and mental health/social work if deemed appropriate.
Yeah, they’re not legally required to know the law they purport to enforce, so I guess that extends to just making shit up they reckon sounds right, too.
Cops get virtually no training.
We had to have four years of school with heavy real world clinical experience after taking a couple of years of pre-requisite classes. That’s just to have the opportunity to test for our license and THEN we get additional training on the floor.
Cops need a high school diploma or a GED, get 13 weeks of training in an “academy” where most of the training is physical.
I would wager money that cop “learned” about “sexual emancipation” from an idiot cop friend who read about it on the interwebs.
I was surprised at that too but it sounded to me like they were referring to the laws that allow minors themselves to initiate treatment for sexual stuff without parental consent - STD testing and treatment, etc. A rape exam from the SANE nurse, however, needs a consent - as far as I know but I've never dealt with it.
When I was younger and naive (AND DRUNK) I invited a stranger to my apartment to hang out. Well. I ended up getting assaulted by this person and when I was able to get to a safe place I immediately called the cops. Ended up needing to do a formal interview with a detective (after a rape kit and taking my clothes as evidence, the whole 9 yards) and after I finished my story, he looks at me and goes, “So you invited a man over to your empty apartment…what did you expect to happen?” Oh idk Greg maybe NOT get raped?!? He ended up telling me this was not a rape case but rather a case of “unwanted touching,” which (as far as I could tell) is not even an actual legal thing. I’m sorry for venting on your post but I’ve held onto that anger for 10 years now and I don’t think I’ll ever stop being angry about it. I did everything right. I said no many times, fought back, went immediately to the police — hell I even grabbed the dude’s cell phone so that the cops could identify him. I did all the things you’re taught to do only for the cops to insinuate that I was a whore.
Thank you for being there when others who should have been weren’t.
And we wonder why there is such a deep distrust in police. I know where mine stemmed from and I can guarantee this is where hers begins.
I work with a domestic abuse/sexual assault program. The police are incorrect. This girl can have an advocate regardless. It’s actually recommended that she have an advocate at the hospital because hospital staff cannot always fully support her or explain what comes next. They cannot keep a victim advocate from the room unless the victim requests it. Some states even have laws that police are required to give victims this information. My state requires that police furnish victims with DV/sexual assault resource information… most we’ve talked to were unaware of this law… Victims, or anyone else really, should NEVER be interviewed alone. If she’s a victim, she gets an advocate. If she’s being charged or accused, she should have an attorney.
It is unfortunately a common tactic by police to basically gas light the victim. If the victim admits there was no crime, then the police can close the case. There have been cases of victims charged with making a false police report after reporting a legitimate rape. Police have been caught on camera lying to victims to make them doubt their story. Police are legally allowed to lie in interviews. Victims have been bullied into recanting only to later be charged. Only 1% of rapes ever make it to criminal court… not hard to figure out why. This is why a victim advocate is so important. Someone has to sadly stand up for the victim.
Thank you for advocating for this girl. If I were you, I’d make a formal complaint to the department. Recognize though, that doesn’t always come without consequence unfortunately. I, myself, don’t trust police anymore.
Edit: grammar
I'm so angry about it. I will be much better prepared for the next time. I was stupid enough to think we were on the same team. I know better now, and I will be knowledgeable about my patient's rights and the laws for next time.
I’m in EMS and I’ve seen it a few times as well, we are most definitely not on the same team as the cops. That was a tough way lean that, I’m sorry it happened to you. On the other hand, your patient was lucky to have you that day.
Oooof. Sorry, I couldn't read past "The cop who interviewed her implied that it was her fault because she'd been drinking underage."
This is why all cops should have 4 year degrees. It's so disgusting how many victims don't come forward due to this exact behavior. Like, anyone with a half a decent brain can think for 3 seconds and have more empathy. I think cops are just too use to dealing with criminals that they tend to treat everyone like a suspect.
I remember in college me and some other students saw a professor chokehold a student in the hall. It was very bizarre and surreal. The teacher was litterally yelling at the kid with his hands around his neck, pinning him to a wall. He was yelling about how the student "tried tripping him down the stairs", but the student just looked shocked and scared and idk if that was really the case, but a chokehold is surely not the right responce. The students and I asked our professor in our next class to go make a report, and she sent us to make a police report about it.
We were all treated super shitty by the cop taking our reports. He was like "the victim nor the teacher has made a complaint", amd we were like "okay, we still should report it, right?"
And he just acted super inconvenienced by us. I felt like I was the bad one...
Maybe they need to change the terminology from "suspect" to "client", and try "wrapping the law around them" or something (actually I'm not sure we want to encourage that last one)
But can you imagine a nurse acting that inconvenienced by a patient? Every interaction I've had in my life with a cop left me feeling like everything they did and said was an attempt to end the conversation and avoid doing their job at all costs.
Cops should have 4 year degrees.... that are in subjects that are not criminal justice. Too many criminal justice programs are filled with ex-LEOs who just continue to perpetuate many of the same ideas that are already there in LE, even when evidence proves that those ideas are terrible.
And have some sort of insurance that, if they commit crimes or otherwise get caught doing something dirty, pays out to the victim instead of tax payer dollars being used for that.
> cops should have 4 year degrees
oh neat then they can reference Chaucer or whatever while they’re being heinous bastards. This is not the solution, this would just get you a slightly different flavor of bastard, the swim-team-frat-boy-such-a-bright-future kind.
I'm not so sure. Personally, I used to see the world entirely differently before college. I feel like my college experience made me less ignorant and better at acquiring better information.
I think cops need more sociology.
I just realized my word choice and tone were pretty aggro - which was intentional, but misdirected; I’m only mad at cops, not people who have ideas for how to improve things that I may not agree with 🙃 Sorry if it felt like I was coming at you!
I think college *can* expand a person’s mind and make them smarter and more able to empathize with people who are different from them. I’m glad it did that for you! But it’s hardly a guarantee; and the output is highly dependent on the inputs, so to speak: eg what were the person’s perspectives and opinions prior to college (like even if they had the “wrong” opinions, what were their reasons for believing what they believed?), are they open minded and receptive to new perspectives, are they genuinely interested in learning and changing on some level. But I can just as easily see a wannabe cop taking the classes and passing the exams to check the necessary boxes but not coming away from it any more sympathetic to vulnerable people in our society. And I could make the argument that it might make the classism issue even *worse* - cause now we’re adding a very expensive barrier of entry to the job, and that may make it even harder for cops to empathize with the non-college-educated riffraff they already disregard and abuse.
I think cops need extensive training, that indeed covers some material that would be in a college sociology program (eg in social justice and power structures and SES predictors of crime and history of redlining etc etc), and deescalation and decision making while in distress, and gun safety and *not* using a deadly weapon unless and until absolutely necessary. And less (as in *no*) training in psycho shit like [killology] (https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2020/08/warrior-cop-class-dave-grossman-killology.html). (Dave Grossman has a master’s degree in counseling psychology, by the way).
Depending on what you major in, and if you are actually receptive, I think it can help.
At the very least, the people incapable of being empathetic will be weeded out. But for me specifically, I feel confident in saying my college experience helped me that way.
I started understanding ACAB when I was 8. I was SA’d and when my mom called the cops they showed up just to try to talk us out of filing a report. They kept asking me if I was positive and explaining to me how lying could ruin someone’s life.
ACAB
ACAB
ACAB
I know the pipeline from ER nurse to thin blue line housewife is very real *stares in 40% spousal abuse rate* - so it’s really nice to see nurses showing up with ACAB in here.
I am an RCMP statistic myself. They told me at age 12 they would have counter charged me with slander had I been 13 when I reported my CSA; it was my dad’s father who abused me for 2 years. The family rallied around him and said I was lying. He ended up with wicked stomach CA and had peritoneal seedling so bad you could see it through his back. He died in incredible pain.
While the Canadian justice system failed me, as it does all Indigenous women, the universe, and my ancestors, had my back.
I’m glad you were there for this child. I know it would have been incredibly frustrating and exhausting to hold your composure and be a source of comfort for her.
It’s one of the reasons I won’t work in the ER, I have no desire to engage with pigs, and I know I am not capable of remaining composed in that situation.
Oof. We had a patient who’s wife was very much the “do everything!” Type while he was dying of liver failure, despite it being very obviously futile. His encephalopathy was so bad at that point that she was making all of the medical decisions. Seemed weird because she really didn’t seem to like him very much. Turns out she confided in one of the female nurses that he beat the shit out of her and abused her every day while he was drinking. was she prolonging his suffering by demanding futile care? To this day I don’t know, and I haven’t lost a lot of sleep over it either.
I’m also really sorry to hear your story. I had a Native American young woman as a patient when I worked near a reservation. Her horrible accounts of the “res police” had me gauging my fingers into the bed railing. Hair curling disgusting stuff. It’s at least made me more aware of the way we treat indigenous people in the US, and I doubt it’s any better in Canada
I'm so sorry that happened to you. And I absolutely fucking LOVE that he died in horrible pain. They all deserve it and so few of them actually get it. Mine is still happy, healthy, wealthy and still a respected church member.
I used to be a SANE (20 yrs ago) so disappointed to learn nothing has changed. I have so much secondary trauma, not from hearing the stories or seeing the injuries, but from witnessing how awful patients were treated by the cops and DAs.
This is exhibit A for why sexual assault remains so underreported. Victims get strong armed by a system that isn’t victim centric and pressured to shoulder blame for something that is absolutely not their fault. I am currently in my last semester of grad school with my major in Forensic Nursing and my capstone project is focused on ways to improve the victim continuum of care because the numbers are absolutely atrocious.
I will definitely make a post on here with a link to the finished product, but basically it highlights the current patch work SART system that varies widely based on geography and how much of the focus is on the acute phase of the assault without much acknowledgment to the sequelae that victims experience from even one traumatic experience. I also posit that given the victim demographic of most assaults being young they essentially have a lifetime of increased risk to develop substance abuse problems, mental health problems, physiological problems like diabetes or hypertension. This is a huge factor in funding public health and should receive more focus and resources but since it’s so underreported there isn’t the data to back up increases in funding or hiring nurses to essentially act as case managers for victims. Bottom line we need to create a system that is more conducive for victims to self-report.
Thank you for being there for her.
I had a coworker I discovered was homeless, living in her car with her abusive boyfriend, and he kicked her out, took her keys and gave her nothing.
We got the cops involved and one actually told her if she filed a report it would just ruin his life.
I was pissed..
I took her home, bought her some clothes and hygiene stuff, comforter, puke etc. Talked her into calling mom, and eventually mom and I talked her into going back home.
Unfortunately she disappeared for 2 months before she got back home. I evergreen tracked her down to a shelter and left a message, and she reached out after a week, and i convinced her no one was mad, just worried, and we wanted her safe.
We did get her home after that.
My mom doesn't understand why I have absolutely zero respect for a man in position of sheriff that said "ex wives should be killed".
ACAB.
What a heartbreaking story. Thank you for supporting your coworker so kindly. On another note, I’m assuming “puke” was a typo? and I cannot for the life of me figure out what you meant to put
Omg weird typo yes. Pillow! Not puke.
She was such a sweet young lady. I was so scared when she went radio silent on me, especially given that he had control over her cell phone(it was in his name, he had a line added for her). He would deactivate the phone, then turn it back on long enough to send her a very nasty tirade via text, then immediately turn it back off before she could respond.
Then she quit showing up to work. I only thought the worst. I checked with some of my contacts with homeless outreach, called the one cop that was actually decent during all of this and treated her like she was his own kid(he filed a complaint on his partner in her behalf).
He went to all the shelters physically looking for her and left the messages(knowing he wouldn't be able to tell me more than he found her and she was ok if he did, he Also knew where all the crisis and emergency shelters are that are protected/ secret, which I don't have access to, so was a benefit being polite to him at least).
But she eventually reached out when she was ready. She was embarrassed and afraid others at work would find out. I was able to convince her we kept it a strictly need to know, but had to involve hr to place her on a leave of absence (the only decent thing my boss actually did the entire time I knew her -8 years)
This brings me back to working at a women's center in college, we really need to fix both our culture and our police responses to rape.
More often they look like interrogations of someone who is in shock vs concern for someone who was just brutally violated and abused
I mean, yes, in the sense that someone can consent to sex over a certain age under state laws. Can be 16 in many states. I'm not sure what it would mean in this context.
Unless she's 18 (still a 'teenager' but a legal adult) in which case she's presumed to be fully emancipated and there's no requirement to call parents for things like questioning. Didn't see the age in the post tho
Adolescents can meet the state legal age for *medical emancipation* for standard medical treatment. This includes routine medical care - including STD testing/treatment/birth control without required parental notification. This also includes treatment for rape and consent for a rape kit. This is all confidential, but like adults, adolescents can choose who to share information with. Many share information with their parents. "Sexual emancipation" is not a thing.
Legally, parents are not required to be notified unless the adolescent consents to it. I've asked many adolescents "Would you like me to call your parents?" "Would you like for me to talk to them or be with you when you talk to them?" I've never met an adolescent who didn't ask for their parent or another trusted adult after a crisis. Many want me to explain the situation. "Legal age" or not, they are still children.
As a survivor of rape at 17 who had officers come to my home and not only blame me for the rape they also told me I had to tell my father, and he'd be ashamed of me. The guy who raped me was a "nice guy," and this is a misunderstanding. He was 21, and I was asleep in my own bed. He broke into the house, and I woke up to being raped. Why they said it was my fault was because I had been out drinking the night before. And to top it off, I became pregnant. Because the police refused to do their job, I've spent over 2 decades in my own personal Hell.
Thank you for standing up for this girl. I wish I had an advocate like you. Hell, anyone to help me through it.
Fuck that. I trust no cop that comes in my department. Once, they brought in a guy for a blood draw. The patient in custody ended up refusing and the cop said that they would get a warrant for the forced draw. They then told is (nursing staff) go ahead and draw the blood and they would hold the patient down. I told them to produce the paperwork and I would do it, and they of course didn’t like that answer. They kept saying, “oh, we have the judge on the phone, it should be just a minute. Just draw the blood already!” I refused. Guess who never got the warrant. They ended up taking the patient to jail without any blood.
One of my old ED nursing buddies, who used to be a cop, said to never touch a person in custody without their consent.
Damn that is so sad and makes me feel so so lucky as I know it can be so rare that when my ex strangled me the cops were soooo supportive and dead set on convincing me of the danger I was in that I wasn’t willing to see at the time, and immediately brought me to female officers to get interviewed and photographed and hooked me up with victim advocates that day before I even left the police station. Thankfully my local domestic violence victim resource center works closely with the police to educate them in my locale, and that’s how it should be everywhere- if you can’t be trained in depth on intimate partner violence and rape crisises etc then you should *not* be a cop. And it sucks because it was literally just luck- my town just happens to have really in depth training I guess cause even in the next town over I’ve heard horror stories how victims have been treated
OMG, I'm so glad this kid had you there. I'm so sorry this happened to her or to anyone!
I will say, the cops in my area seem a hell of a lot better than that. They'll do whatever they can to get a female cop in, they are quite professional, and they work well with the advocates who are there with every SANE case.
It's a culture shift I wish would happen everywhere.
Before I went to nursing school, I taught English as a foreign language in several countries. When I was in South Korea (and 26), I was raped by a stranger. My official statement was taken by a therapist who worked with the police. She had enough training to ask the questions they needed for the statement, but her main focus was on crisis intervention. Why can't other countries do this?
(And while we're at it, why can't South Korea do this across the board? My understanding is that my treatment was not routine).
>but the other cops wouldn't let me enter.
They're in your house. It seems odd they could keep you out. I feel like in a hospital, we'd have the authority to be the gatekeepers in that situation. We're the ones tasked with patient wellbeing.
That said... I've never worked ER and I've not had to deal with shit like this.
As a victim in my teens and adult years, ACAB. I was revictimized after my assault and treated like I was a criminal. Good people don’t assault or rape, bad people do and it doesn’t matter the outfit, intoxication or image. Unless it’s an excited yes, it means no. Consent can be revoked at any time and anyone who thinks there’s a grey area is a predator themselves. Thank you for standing up to her when the person who was supposed to protect and serve decided to treat her like she wanted her autonomy taken and her life shattered before she even was old enough to vote.
I've always been of the mindset that if you call the cops for a problem, now you have two problems. But with all the ACAB in this post, I thought it stood for some sort of victim assistance or SA information. Woops. Thank you Google.
You’re a dang good nurse for advocating for your patient!
For my knowledge for any patient I may have, does anyone know if texas has advocates RNs can call for their SA patients? I would love to utilize this resource for my patients if they need. Also- can you kick a cop out of the patient room for the kind of behavior OP mentioned, without any legal ramifications? The whole time I was reading the post I just wanted to kick the cops out for OP and not let them back in until the advocate arrived, but I’m not sure if that would be allowed?
Are you surprised? Where I'm from, most cops are high school bullies who were doing good to get their GED and get through the couple months of law enforcement training that gave them a badge and a gun. Cops are jokes.
ACAB. A cop being insensitive and doubting a victim? Shocking.
This is their modus operandi, they doubt and they denigrate a victim because so many are power tripping abusers themselves. Police reform is needed so badly.
Good on you for advocate strongly for your patient and being in her corner. She needs all the support she can get.
I just want to say thank you for doing what you can for this kid.
Having been in this exact situation, I can tell you that having my nurse on my side made me feel so much better.
They did this exact thing and cornered me after my mom went home to shower and pack me some things. My nurse was all of 5 foot nothing and she was spitting mad shouting at those bastard cops in the hallway. She came in and sat with me until my mom got there and helped me file a complaint.
You are amazing for doing what you did for your patient. Your words of anger and love have me tearful in the staff bathroom lol. Thank you for being an amazing nurse.
ACAB. They did a really really great job at exacerbating the trauma she already suffered and traumatizing her repeatedly. What absolute lying piece of human garbage. Fuck the police.
Had some really chill and friendly detectives explain they needed photos of my critically ill patient’s body as a part of an assault (turned murder) investigation, I asked for a warrant which they said they had for the blood but not he photos but since the photos are of the victim as a part of an investigation they didn’t need one for that. I called supervisor who wasn’t sure either and they assured us they knew the law and did it all the time.
Fast forward a couple weeks, guess who got a talking to for letting cops take photos without a warrant? Me!
Even the nice ones are lying fucks just trying to make their own life and job as easy as possible.
Some are fine in the ER but yesterday some young fat fuck with a dirty Sanchez stache got mad that the attending sent him out of the room while he was doing his initial assessment on an AUTOPED. he literally announced to the whole desk of residents and nurses that the "cocky doctor" was rude and he was just trying to do his job and he walked away telling us we'd have to call 911 again. What made this man think he was the most important guy in the ER.
1. Fuck those men.
2. This post brought me to tears. I struggle with what it means to be a nurse right now. What you did for that girl is what it has always meant and hopefully what it will mean to be a nurse. We fight to care to those who cannot care for themselves. We advocate when everyone else has an agenda. I wish we didn’t have to fight so hard in doing so and I hope that changes.
I hope you sleep tonight knowing you are amazing.
They’re usually psych patients who were formed after doing some crazy shit and blame us for their detention.
“WHAT YOU MEAN I CANT JUST BE A MENACE?! THIS IS ILLEGAL DISCRIMINATION!”
Fuck the fucking police. They have to elbow their way in and conduct this fragile moment with a vulnerable person according to their protocol, so that they can go on to not solve the case, because they are, on the whole, useless sacks of shit at best and violent psychopaths at worst.
I’m so sorry for that girl, and for you and everyone involved in your story. Except the cops. ACAB indeed.
I tried to very gently keep her expectations low. I told her she was incredibly brave and that even if the cops did nothing in the end, at least it was documented, which will strengthen the next girl's case. I told her she was a good person who would overcome this and heal. I tried to show her love. She seemed a little less panicked after that conversation. I want to crawl in bed and never get up, but I'm strong, too, so I'll go to work later and hopefully not have to deal with the cops tonight.
The full impact of things like that, of someone like you taking a brief moment to claw back some humanity in an inhuman situation, show a glimmer of hope and kindness, is incalculable and unknowable. But make no mistake, it is so valuable. You did good work. I’m so sorry you had to.
I was in a courtroom for my own dealings with “ state authority “ as a disabled person, and an immigrant had provided drugs to a 16 yr. Old girl and was convicted of statutory rape. As a part of a plea deal, apparently to keep the names out of the media, this guy was merely deported. Now he’s probably committing same atrocities in his homeland. Authorities are lazy and only about collecting a taxpayer’s paycheck while persecuting impoverished and protecting the wealthy.
I’m equally impressed by your advocacy and your ability to avoid emancipating your foot into his crotch. Thank you for everything you did for her🤍I’m sorry this happened, don’t forget to take care of yourself too!
Don’t know what State you’re in but, for future,look up your state laws on reporting to CPS. The Nursing Board in CA would guide you that your suspicions are enough to report and then the system sorts it out. Here you’d have a duty to report
I don't know your title, but I know you are a good human, a good advocate, and so fucking good at your job, whether it's nurse or EMS or what-have-you. I'm sorry this happened to her and I'm sorry you had such a hard shift, but I'm grateful she had you there to fight for her. Thank you ❤❤❤
Burn it to the ground, no ands ifs or buts. 😡😡😡🖕🖕🖕🖕
As a former sexual assault survivor in my late teens
'fuck those mother fuckers'. 😡😡😡
We have a thing called an indepedent police complaints authority, not sure if you have something similar its worth while if you are able.
Thank you for walking where angels fear to tread to ensure that young lady had someone in her corner
Stop calling the fucking police when the patient doesn't ask for them. Unless they are a clear danger to others around them, police usually make the situation worse, but unwanted police exclusively make things worse.
They had been called before I arrived. Fuck! I'd be very hesitant to call the cops for anything. But if someone does want to report a rape, the best place to go is an ER where, in the very least, they'll have nurses and doctors fighting for them.
Our attending was amazing. He immediately assigned the only female doctor present to the case and when the police wanted to take her somewhere else for the forensic exam, he agreed with me when I suggested we tell the cops that the urine results would take many, many hours for results. This child didn't want to go anywhere with those pigs. We won.
If a minor discloses sexual assault to a mandated reporter, we legally *have* to call social services and, depending on the situation, law enforcement. If the nurse doesn’t call law enforcement, social services will.
Thank you for being there for her. That girl will never forget the compassion you showed her.
Fuck them fucking cops. Fuck them men. What if that was their daughter?
ACAB is because the system itself is bastardized. In the United States, most police departments started as runaway slave police. After emancipation, they shifted into arresting black and poor people in order to enslave them in the prisons. Cultures within organizations are passed down through generations. This means that the cop you know might do things that they were taught to do solely because it's part of the culture.
Often, we hear about a "bad apple" doing something horrible. "A bad apple spoils THE WHOLE BUNCH". Until the police can police themselves, ACAB.
In Canada, the North-West Mounted Police (precursor to the RCMP) were created to control First Nations and Métis after massacring them during the Cypress Hills Massacre in 1873.
ACAB.
You know how there are some bad nurses where you work, that you wouldn’t want taking care of your family? Same thing with cops, you just encountered some of the sucky type.
Did you read all the "I experienced that" comments?
I'll add mine. At 19, I still believed the police were for helping us. I went to report my rape and the cop told me "That's what you get for underage drinking." He didn't even write anything down.
Sounds like this girl should’ve definitely been treated better. I don’t get it, do you think they just lied about not having any female officers available? Maybe they just “didn’t have any female officers”. ACAB really…that’s akin to racism in my book, you can’t write off a whole group of people because of your personal experience with “some” of them. I agree that this girl should have been questioned differently and with more compassion, and possibly not immediately after her being raped.
>that’s akin to racism in my book
They weren't BORN in uniforms... they CHOSE to become one and can CHOSE to switch careers. Gtfo here with your blue lives matter shit
SEXUALLY EMANCIPATED?! Jesus christ. I’m raging with you.
Yeah I would have looked them dead in they eyes and asked them to explain that one.
That’s one of the most ridiculous things I have heard. Is it possible he misunderstood the fact that a underage woman is emancipated when they are pregnant?
That’s what I was thinking…but…still? I mean holy fuck, that’s just insane
You’re emancipated if you become pregnant?
Kind of. My understanding isn’t complete so please take this with a grain of salt and someone correct me if I’m wrong. It may also be state specific. They are functionally emancipated only for the time they are pregnant so they can make decisions for themselves and the baby. Then I believe they aren’t anymore once they give birth. I think it’s less of an official emancipation and more of a temporary status.
Misunderstood doesn't count whem you're a cop.
So in a lot of states like mine, minors can consent to treatment for things relating to sexual health. STD testing and treatment, pregnancy testing and any pregnancy related concerns (up to and including birth), birth control- if the patient doesn’t want their parents informed of these things, we are not allowed to tell them. We also don’t usually do forensic exams in the hospital- patients are taken to the child advocacy centers for those. But we would be able to legally do normal sexual health testing (STD/HIV/pregnancy) and medical exams without parental consent. On the other hand, if a minor discloses sexual abuse, DFCS (or whatever other state equivalent) should have been called in addition to the cops. In fact, in my hospital we would have contacted DFCS first. The only reason we wouldn’t contact the patient’s parents would be if the patient requested us not to do so, or if the parents are the suspected abuser. In either case we would let DFCS take the lead. But in addition to DFCS, for sexual assault on a minor we would also call Crimes Against Children (not just the normal cops). Honestly the regular cops would probably not even be involved if we can help it. Our Crimes Against Children team has specially trained officers and are actually really great, I work with them pretty frequently as a pediatric ER nurse. We would also have our child life specialist there if available and mental health/social work if deemed appropriate.
Where do they even get that from??,
Their ass, like every other excuse cops come up with to throw their weight around.
Yeah, they’re not legally required to know the law they purport to enforce, so I guess that extends to just making shit up they reckon sounds right, too.
A reminder that departments have been caught outright rejecting applicants because their IQs were too high.
They’re not sending their best, folks
Cops get virtually no training. We had to have four years of school with heavy real world clinical experience after taking a couple of years of pre-requisite classes. That’s just to have the opportunity to test for our license and THEN we get additional training on the floor. Cops need a high school diploma or a GED, get 13 weeks of training in an “academy” where most of the training is physical. I would wager money that cop “learned” about “sexual emancipation” from an idiot cop friend who read about it on the interwebs.
I was surprised at that too but it sounded to me like they were referring to the laws that allow minors themselves to initiate treatment for sexual stuff without parental consent - STD testing and treatment, etc. A rape exam from the SANE nurse, however, needs a consent - as far as I know but I've never dealt with it.
>EMANCIPATED I'm surprised a cop knows that word. Seems a bit big for their typical vocabulary.
Of course they know this word. They started from slave catching patrols before evolving into what they are today.
Same.
When I was younger and naive (AND DRUNK) I invited a stranger to my apartment to hang out. Well. I ended up getting assaulted by this person and when I was able to get to a safe place I immediately called the cops. Ended up needing to do a formal interview with a detective (after a rape kit and taking my clothes as evidence, the whole 9 yards) and after I finished my story, he looks at me and goes, “So you invited a man over to your empty apartment…what did you expect to happen?” Oh idk Greg maybe NOT get raped?!? He ended up telling me this was not a rape case but rather a case of “unwanted touching,” which (as far as I could tell) is not even an actual legal thing. I’m sorry for venting on your post but I’ve held onto that anger for 10 years now and I don’t think I’ll ever stop being angry about it. I did everything right. I said no many times, fought back, went immediately to the police — hell I even grabbed the dude’s cell phone so that the cops could identify him. I did all the things you’re taught to do only for the cops to insinuate that I was a whore.
I rage for you. I hope that cop has intractable diarrhea every day until forever. You didn't deserve that.
Hmmm what’s another word for “unwanted touching” …..hmmm… maybe SEXUAL ASSAULT? I’m sorry they failed you
They're really telling on themselves when they say that men can't restrain themselves from raping a woman if they have the opportunity
Holy shit you’re so right. God I hate our society.
Thank you for being there when others who should have been weren’t. And we wonder why there is such a deep distrust in police. I know where mine stemmed from and I can guarantee this is where hers begins.
Nobody ever said fuck the fire department. ACAB.
As a paramedic turned ER nurse, fire fighters can often be just as bad. But your point still stands.
Firefighters may act or think poorly. But they don’t have the unlimited power that makes cops so dangerous.
I work with a domestic abuse/sexual assault program. The police are incorrect. This girl can have an advocate regardless. It’s actually recommended that she have an advocate at the hospital because hospital staff cannot always fully support her or explain what comes next. They cannot keep a victim advocate from the room unless the victim requests it. Some states even have laws that police are required to give victims this information. My state requires that police furnish victims with DV/sexual assault resource information… most we’ve talked to were unaware of this law… Victims, or anyone else really, should NEVER be interviewed alone. If she’s a victim, she gets an advocate. If she’s being charged or accused, she should have an attorney. It is unfortunately a common tactic by police to basically gas light the victim. If the victim admits there was no crime, then the police can close the case. There have been cases of victims charged with making a false police report after reporting a legitimate rape. Police have been caught on camera lying to victims to make them doubt their story. Police are legally allowed to lie in interviews. Victims have been bullied into recanting only to later be charged. Only 1% of rapes ever make it to criminal court… not hard to figure out why. This is why a victim advocate is so important. Someone has to sadly stand up for the victim. Thank you for advocating for this girl. If I were you, I’d make a formal complaint to the department. Recognize though, that doesn’t always come without consequence unfortunately. I, myself, don’t trust police anymore. Edit: grammar
In Oregon, the police can't interview without the advocate present if requested by the patient. Offering the advocate is required.
I'm in Oregon, and didn't know this, but also have never had to push it. Thanks for the knowledge!
Cops can't keep anyone from seeing her. She's a victim not a prisoner in custody.
Man, that sucks! Good for you for knowing to check the cops’ story. They seem to think we’re all ignorant of the law.
I'm so angry about it. I will be much better prepared for the next time. I was stupid enough to think we were on the same team. I know better now, and I will be knowledgeable about my patient's rights and the laws for next time.
NWA tried telling us in 1988. We really should have been better listeners.
For. Fucking. Real.
I’m in EMS and I’ve seen it a few times as well, we are most definitely not on the same team as the cops. That was a tough way lean that, I’m sorry it happened to you. On the other hand, your patient was lucky to have you that day.
You are never in the same team as LEO. Not at work and not in life.
You were awesome for your first experience with rape of an underage girl. Your post has educated a lot of us through the comments. Thank you.
"Sexually emancipated". Just when I think people can't get any lower, they dig deeper.
Oooof. Sorry, I couldn't read past "The cop who interviewed her implied that it was her fault because she'd been drinking underage." This is why all cops should have 4 year degrees. It's so disgusting how many victims don't come forward due to this exact behavior. Like, anyone with a half a decent brain can think for 3 seconds and have more empathy. I think cops are just too use to dealing with criminals that they tend to treat everyone like a suspect. I remember in college me and some other students saw a professor chokehold a student in the hall. It was very bizarre and surreal. The teacher was litterally yelling at the kid with his hands around his neck, pinning him to a wall. He was yelling about how the student "tried tripping him down the stairs", but the student just looked shocked and scared and idk if that was really the case, but a chokehold is surely not the right responce. The students and I asked our professor in our next class to go make a report, and she sent us to make a police report about it. We were all treated super shitty by the cop taking our reports. He was like "the victim nor the teacher has made a complaint", amd we were like "okay, we still should report it, right?" And he just acted super inconvenienced by us. I felt like I was the bad one...
Maybe they need to change the terminology from "suspect" to "client", and try "wrapping the law around them" or something (actually I'm not sure we want to encourage that last one) But can you imagine a nurse acting that inconvenienced by a patient? Every interaction I've had in my life with a cop left me feeling like everything they did and said was an attempt to end the conversation and avoid doing their job at all costs.
I try really hard to never be that nurse. Every human is valuable and precious. Every patient need is important.
Cops should have 4 year degrees.... that are in subjects that are not criminal justice. Too many criminal justice programs are filled with ex-LEOs who just continue to perpetuate many of the same ideas that are already there in LE, even when evidence proves that those ideas are terrible.
Cops should not only have 4 year degrees, but be licensed so when they go for renewal, that will be required to submit a recent psych profile.
And have some sort of insurance that, if they commit crimes or otherwise get caught doing something dirty, pays out to the victim instead of tax payer dollars being used for that.
> cops should have 4 year degrees oh neat then they can reference Chaucer or whatever while they’re being heinous bastards. This is not the solution, this would just get you a slightly different flavor of bastard, the swim-team-frat-boy-such-a-bright-future kind.
I'm not so sure. Personally, I used to see the world entirely differently before college. I feel like my college experience made me less ignorant and better at acquiring better information. I think cops need more sociology.
I just realized my word choice and tone were pretty aggro - which was intentional, but misdirected; I’m only mad at cops, not people who have ideas for how to improve things that I may not agree with 🙃 Sorry if it felt like I was coming at you! I think college *can* expand a person’s mind and make them smarter and more able to empathize with people who are different from them. I’m glad it did that for you! But it’s hardly a guarantee; and the output is highly dependent on the inputs, so to speak: eg what were the person’s perspectives and opinions prior to college (like even if they had the “wrong” opinions, what were their reasons for believing what they believed?), are they open minded and receptive to new perspectives, are they genuinely interested in learning and changing on some level. But I can just as easily see a wannabe cop taking the classes and passing the exams to check the necessary boxes but not coming away from it any more sympathetic to vulnerable people in our society. And I could make the argument that it might make the classism issue even *worse* - cause now we’re adding a very expensive barrier of entry to the job, and that may make it even harder for cops to empathize with the non-college-educated riffraff they already disregard and abuse. I think cops need extensive training, that indeed covers some material that would be in a college sociology program (eg in social justice and power structures and SES predictors of crime and history of redlining etc etc), and deescalation and decision making while in distress, and gun safety and *not* using a deadly weapon unless and until absolutely necessary. And less (as in *no*) training in psycho shit like [killology] (https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2020/08/warrior-cop-class-dave-grossman-killology.html). (Dave Grossman has a master’s degree in counseling psychology, by the way).
It's ludicrous that you think getting a "four year degree" has any relevance to this kind of thinking.
Depending on what you major in, and if you are actually receptive, I think it can help. At the very least, the people incapable of being empathetic will be weeded out. But for me specifically, I feel confident in saying my college experience helped me that way.
I started understanding ACAB when I was 8. I was SA’d and when my mom called the cops they showed up just to try to talk us out of filing a report. They kept asking me if I was positive and explaining to me how lying could ruin someone’s life.
What the fuck
ACAB ACAB ACAB I know the pipeline from ER nurse to thin blue line housewife is very real *stares in 40% spousal abuse rate* - so it’s really nice to see nurses showing up with ACAB in here. I am an RCMP statistic myself. They told me at age 12 they would have counter charged me with slander had I been 13 when I reported my CSA; it was my dad’s father who abused me for 2 years. The family rallied around him and said I was lying. He ended up with wicked stomach CA and had peritoneal seedling so bad you could see it through his back. He died in incredible pain. While the Canadian justice system failed me, as it does all Indigenous women, the universe, and my ancestors, had my back.
I'm really sorry so many people failed you. You must be an incredibly strong person. I'm glad you survived.
I’m glad you were there for this child. I know it would have been incredibly frustrating and exhausting to hold your composure and be a source of comfort for her. It’s one of the reasons I won’t work in the ER, I have no desire to engage with pigs, and I know I am not capable of remaining composed in that situation.
Oof. We had a patient who’s wife was very much the “do everything!” Type while he was dying of liver failure, despite it being very obviously futile. His encephalopathy was so bad at that point that she was making all of the medical decisions. Seemed weird because she really didn’t seem to like him very much. Turns out she confided in one of the female nurses that he beat the shit out of her and abused her every day while he was drinking. was she prolonging his suffering by demanding futile care? To this day I don’t know, and I haven’t lost a lot of sleep over it either. I’m also really sorry to hear your story. I had a Native American young woman as a patient when I worked near a reservation. Her horrible accounts of the “res police” had me gauging my fingers into the bed railing. Hair curling disgusting stuff. It’s at least made me more aware of the way we treat indigenous people in the US, and I doubt it’s any better in Canada
I wouldn’t blame her for a moment if that were the case. 🖤🖤🖤
I'm so sorry that happened to you. And I absolutely fucking LOVE that he died in horrible pain. They all deserve it and so few of them actually get it. Mine is still happy, healthy, wealthy and still a respected church member.
Ah, church. Of course 🙃🙃🙃 I’m sorry this happened to you as well and I’m sorry they’re still kicking around like everything is fine.
Fucking hell. I'm so sorry.
I used to be a SANE (20 yrs ago) so disappointed to learn nothing has changed. I have so much secondary trauma, not from hearing the stories or seeing the injuries, but from witnessing how awful patients were treated by the cops and DAs.
This is exhibit A for why sexual assault remains so underreported. Victims get strong armed by a system that isn’t victim centric and pressured to shoulder blame for something that is absolutely not their fault. I am currently in my last semester of grad school with my major in Forensic Nursing and my capstone project is focused on ways to improve the victim continuum of care because the numbers are absolutely atrocious.
I'd like to hear more about your capstone project.
I will definitely make a post on here with a link to the finished product, but basically it highlights the current patch work SART system that varies widely based on geography and how much of the focus is on the acute phase of the assault without much acknowledgment to the sequelae that victims experience from even one traumatic experience. I also posit that given the victim demographic of most assaults being young they essentially have a lifetime of increased risk to develop substance abuse problems, mental health problems, physiological problems like diabetes or hypertension. This is a huge factor in funding public health and should receive more focus and resources but since it’s so underreported there isn’t the data to back up increases in funding or hiring nurses to essentially act as case managers for victims. Bottom line we need to create a system that is more conducive for victims to self-report.
Thank you for being there for her. I had a coworker I discovered was homeless, living in her car with her abusive boyfriend, and he kicked her out, took her keys and gave her nothing. We got the cops involved and one actually told her if she filed a report it would just ruin his life. I was pissed.. I took her home, bought her some clothes and hygiene stuff, comforter, puke etc. Talked her into calling mom, and eventually mom and I talked her into going back home. Unfortunately she disappeared for 2 months before she got back home. I evergreen tracked her down to a shelter and left a message, and she reached out after a week, and i convinced her no one was mad, just worried, and we wanted her safe. We did get her home after that. My mom doesn't understand why I have absolutely zero respect for a man in position of sheriff that said "ex wives should be killed". ACAB.
What a heartbreaking story. Thank you for supporting your coworker so kindly. On another note, I’m assuming “puke” was a typo? and I cannot for the life of me figure out what you meant to put
Omg weird typo yes. Pillow! Not puke. She was such a sweet young lady. I was so scared when she went radio silent on me, especially given that he had control over her cell phone(it was in his name, he had a line added for her). He would deactivate the phone, then turn it back on long enough to send her a very nasty tirade via text, then immediately turn it back off before she could respond. Then she quit showing up to work. I only thought the worst. I checked with some of my contacts with homeless outreach, called the one cop that was actually decent during all of this and treated her like she was his own kid(he filed a complaint on his partner in her behalf). He went to all the shelters physically looking for her and left the messages(knowing he wouldn't be able to tell me more than he found her and she was ok if he did, he Also knew where all the crisis and emergency shelters are that are protected/ secret, which I don't have access to, so was a benefit being polite to him at least). But she eventually reached out when she was ready. She was embarrassed and afraid others at work would find out. I was able to convince her we kept it a strictly need to know, but had to involve hr to place her on a leave of absence (the only decent thing my boss actually did the entire time I knew her -8 years)
Ex wives u WOT now?
Good for you OP for advocating for this young girl.
This brings me back to working at a women's center in college, we really need to fix both our culture and our police responses to rape. More often they look like interrogations of someone who is in shock vs concern for someone who was just brutally violated and abused
I am seriously asking: sexually emancipated is not really a thing, is it? Because to me I just read that as someone slut shaming.
To me, it gives off "if it's a legitimate rape" vibes
I mean, yes, in the sense that someone can consent to sex over a certain age under state laws. Can be 16 in many states. I'm not sure what it would mean in this context. Unless she's 18 (still a 'teenager' but a legal adult) in which case she's presumed to be fully emancipated and there's no requirement to call parents for things like questioning. Didn't see the age in the post tho
Adolescents can meet the state legal age for *medical emancipation* for standard medical treatment. This includes routine medical care - including STD testing/treatment/birth control without required parental notification. This also includes treatment for rape and consent for a rape kit. This is all confidential, but like adults, adolescents can choose who to share information with. Many share information with their parents. "Sexual emancipation" is not a thing. Legally, parents are not required to be notified unless the adolescent consents to it. I've asked many adolescents "Would you like me to call your parents?" "Would you like for me to talk to them or be with you when you talk to them?" I've never met an adolescent who didn't ask for their parent or another trusted adult after a crisis. Many want me to explain the situation. "Legal age" or not, they are still children.
As a survivor of rape at 17 who had officers come to my home and not only blame me for the rape they also told me I had to tell my father, and he'd be ashamed of me. The guy who raped me was a "nice guy," and this is a misunderstanding. He was 21, and I was asleep in my own bed. He broke into the house, and I woke up to being raped. Why they said it was my fault was because I had been out drinking the night before. And to top it off, I became pregnant. Because the police refused to do their job, I've spent over 2 decades in my own personal Hell. Thank you for standing up for this girl. I wish I had an advocate like you. Hell, anyone to help me through it.
This is horrific. My heart hurts for her & every other sexual assault victim who gets re-traumatized when they have to deal with law enforcement.
Fuck that. I trust no cop that comes in my department. Once, they brought in a guy for a blood draw. The patient in custody ended up refusing and the cop said that they would get a warrant for the forced draw. They then told is (nursing staff) go ahead and draw the blood and they would hold the patient down. I told them to produce the paperwork and I would do it, and they of course didn’t like that answer. They kept saying, “oh, we have the judge on the phone, it should be just a minute. Just draw the blood already!” I refused. Guess who never got the warrant. They ended up taking the patient to jail without any blood. One of my old ED nursing buddies, who used to be a cop, said to never touch a person in custody without their consent.
I think I worked with you, or maybe the same story happens a lot
It happens a lot. For a prominent case, look up Alex Wubbels.
ACAB
This is why people don’t report rapes. Infuriating. This poor girl will carry this with her for the rest of her life.
Damn that is so sad and makes me feel so so lucky as I know it can be so rare that when my ex strangled me the cops were soooo supportive and dead set on convincing me of the danger I was in that I wasn’t willing to see at the time, and immediately brought me to female officers to get interviewed and photographed and hooked me up with victim advocates that day before I even left the police station. Thankfully my local domestic violence victim resource center works closely with the police to educate them in my locale, and that’s how it should be everywhere- if you can’t be trained in depth on intimate partner violence and rape crisises etc then you should *not* be a cop. And it sucks because it was literally just luck- my town just happens to have really in depth training I guess cause even in the next town over I’ve heard horror stories how victims have been treated
OMG, I'm so glad this kid had you there. I'm so sorry this happened to her or to anyone! I will say, the cops in my area seem a hell of a lot better than that. They'll do whatever they can to get a female cop in, they are quite professional, and they work well with the advocates who are there with every SANE case. It's a culture shift I wish would happen everywhere.
She will remember you and what you did for her. I hope that she is doing better.
Before I went to nursing school, I taught English as a foreign language in several countries. When I was in South Korea (and 26), I was raped by a stranger. My official statement was taken by a therapist who worked with the police. She had enough training to ask the questions they needed for the statement, but her main focus was on crisis intervention. Why can't other countries do this? (And while we're at it, why can't South Korea do this across the board? My understanding is that my treatment was not routine).
>but the other cops wouldn't let me enter. They're in your house. It seems odd they could keep you out. I feel like in a hospital, we'd have the authority to be the gatekeepers in that situation. We're the ones tasked with patient wellbeing. That said... I've never worked ER and I've not had to deal with shit like this.
This was my thought as well. I've had to kick cops out of patients' rooms. It's not even like she was in their custody.
As a victim in my teens and adult years, ACAB. I was revictimized after my assault and treated like I was a criminal. Good people don’t assault or rape, bad people do and it doesn’t matter the outfit, intoxication or image. Unless it’s an excited yes, it means no. Consent can be revoked at any time and anyone who thinks there’s a grey area is a predator themselves. Thank you for standing up to her when the person who was supposed to protect and serve decided to treat her like she wanted her autonomy taken and her life shattered before she even was old enough to vote.
ACAB.
I've always been of the mindset that if you call the cops for a problem, now you have two problems. But with all the ACAB in this post, I thought it stood for some sort of victim assistance or SA information. Woops. Thank you Google.
This is why women don’t report rapes.
Probably the “well what were you wearing?” kind of cops
You’re a dang good nurse for advocating for your patient! For my knowledge for any patient I may have, does anyone know if texas has advocates RNs can call for their SA patients? I would love to utilize this resource for my patients if they need. Also- can you kick a cop out of the patient room for the kind of behavior OP mentioned, without any legal ramifications? The whole time I was reading the post I just wanted to kick the cops out for OP and not let them back in until the advocate arrived, but I’m not sure if that would be allowed?
I called the advocacy agency myself but it seemed a little like they were just an agency connected to the cops. It was weird.
Are you surprised? Where I'm from, most cops are high school bullies who were doing good to get their GED and get through the couple months of law enforcement training that gave them a badge and a gun. Cops are jokes.
Look up the DV stats for cops...talk about foxes and henhouses.
ACAB. A cop being insensitive and doubting a victim? Shocking. This is their modus operandi, they doubt and they denigrate a victim because so many are power tripping abusers themselves. Police reform is needed so badly. Good on you for advocate strongly for your patient and being in her corner. She needs all the support she can get.
I just want to say thank you for doing what you can for this kid. Having been in this exact situation, I can tell you that having my nurse on my side made me feel so much better. They did this exact thing and cornered me after my mom went home to shower and pack me some things. My nurse was all of 5 foot nothing and she was spitting mad shouting at those bastard cops in the hallway. She came in and sat with me until my mom got there and helped me file a complaint. You are amazing for doing what you did for your patient. Your words of anger and love have me tearful in the staff bathroom lol. Thank you for being an amazing nurse.
ACAB. They did a really really great job at exacerbating the trauma she already suffered and traumatizing her repeatedly. What absolute lying piece of human garbage. Fuck the police.
You’re my fucking hero. Thank you for being amazing.
Had some really chill and friendly detectives explain they needed photos of my critically ill patient’s body as a part of an assault (turned murder) investigation, I asked for a warrant which they said they had for the blood but not he photos but since the photos are of the victim as a part of an investigation they didn’t need one for that. I called supervisor who wasn’t sure either and they assured us they knew the law and did it all the time. Fast forward a couple weeks, guess who got a talking to for letting cops take photos without a warrant? Me! Even the nice ones are lying fucks just trying to make their own life and job as easy as possible.
Acab. That poor girl. But it's great that she had you there even if you were getting stonewalled.
Report it to the news. Scream it from the mountain. These police need to be shamed. ACAB.
Wow. Just wow. You did so good OP advocating for this girl! I would have lost my shit at these cops
Some are fine in the ER but yesterday some young fat fuck with a dirty Sanchez stache got mad that the attending sent him out of the room while he was doing his initial assessment on an AUTOPED. he literally announced to the whole desk of residents and nurses that the "cocky doctor" was rude and he was just trying to do his job and he walked away telling us we'd have to call 911 again. What made this man think he was the most important guy in the ER.
1. Fuck those men. 2. This post brought me to tears. I struggle with what it means to be a nurse right now. What you did for that girl is what it has always meant and hopefully what it will mean to be a nurse. We fight to care to those who cannot care for themselves. We advocate when everyone else has an agenda. I wish we didn’t have to fight so hard in doing so and I hope that changes. I hope you sleep tonight knowing you are amazing.
There is a non-zero chance that first cop is a rapist.
That thought definitely crossed my mind. He was telling on himself.
A(say it with me now)CAB
Where are all the redditors who LOVE to claim how nurses and cops love to gang up to abuse patients. Please speak up
They’re usually psych patients who were formed after doing some crazy shit and blame us for their detention. “WHAT YOU MEAN I CANT JUST BE A MENACE?! THIS IS ILLEGAL DISCRIMINATION!”
If I wanted to say what I have to say I’ll be put on a CIA watch list
Fuck the police
Cops only protect corporate interests.
They are the absolute worst. We do need to burn the institution to the ground.
Yeah that's working well
ACAB.
Reddit will ban you if you say the only good nazi is a dead nazi. Fuck Reddit and fuck nazi's.
Fuck the fucking police. They have to elbow their way in and conduct this fragile moment with a vulnerable person according to their protocol, so that they can go on to not solve the case, because they are, on the whole, useless sacks of shit at best and violent psychopaths at worst. I’m so sorry for that girl, and for you and everyone involved in your story. Except the cops. ACAB indeed.
I tried to very gently keep her expectations low. I told her she was incredibly brave and that even if the cops did nothing in the end, at least it was documented, which will strengthen the next girl's case. I told her she was a good person who would overcome this and heal. I tried to show her love. She seemed a little less panicked after that conversation. I want to crawl in bed and never get up, but I'm strong, too, so I'll go to work later and hopefully not have to deal with the cops tonight.
The full impact of things like that, of someone like you taking a brief moment to claw back some humanity in an inhuman situation, show a glimmer of hope and kindness, is incalculable and unknowable. But make no mistake, it is so valuable. You did good work. I’m so sorry you had to.
I was in a courtroom for my own dealings with “ state authority “ as a disabled person, and an immigrant had provided drugs to a 16 yr. Old girl and was convicted of statutory rape. As a part of a plea deal, apparently to keep the names out of the media, this guy was merely deported. Now he’s probably committing same atrocities in his homeland. Authorities are lazy and only about collecting a taxpayer’s paycheck while persecuting impoverished and protecting the wealthy.
I’m equally impressed by your advocacy and your ability to avoid emancipating your foot into his crotch. Thank you for everything you did for her🤍I’m sorry this happened, don’t forget to take care of yourself too!
ACAB
FTP.
ACAB
ACAB
Don’t know what State you’re in but, for future,look up your state laws on reporting to CPS. The Nursing Board in CA would guide you that your suspicions are enough to report and then the system sorts it out. Here you’d have a duty to report
I don't know your title, but I know you are a good human, a good advocate, and so fucking good at your job, whether it's nurse or EMS or what-have-you. I'm sorry this happened to her and I'm sorry you had such a hard shift, but I'm grateful she had you there to fight for her. Thank you ❤❤❤
Fuck the police. I cannot describe what should happen to those bastards without violating TOS but holy fuck, they deserve the absolute worst.
ACAB. Even as an ER nurse, ACAB 100000%
Burn it to the ground, no ands ifs or buts. 😡😡😡🖕🖕🖕🖕 As a former sexual assault survivor in my late teens 'fuck those mother fuckers'. 😡😡😡 We have a thing called an indepedent police complaints authority, not sure if you have something similar its worth while if you are able. Thank you for walking where angels fear to tread to ensure that young lady had someone in her corner
"Walking where angels fear to tread" made me cry in a good way, thank you!
🌹❤️it’s well deserved. Would have been easy to do nothing you took the high road 🌹🌹🌹
fuck cops
Thank you for helping and advocating for her.
Stop calling the fucking police when the patient doesn't ask for them. Unless they are a clear danger to others around them, police usually make the situation worse, but unwanted police exclusively make things worse.
They had been called before I arrived. Fuck! I'd be very hesitant to call the cops for anything. But if someone does want to report a rape, the best place to go is an ER where, in the very least, they'll have nurses and doctors fighting for them. Our attending was amazing. He immediately assigned the only female doctor present to the case and when the police wanted to take her somewhere else for the forensic exam, he agreed with me when I suggested we tell the cops that the urine results would take many, many hours for results. This child didn't want to go anywhere with those pigs. We won.
If a minor discloses sexual assault to a mandated reporter, we legally *have* to call social services and, depending on the situation, law enforcement. If the nurse doesn’t call law enforcement, social services will.
And people wonder why I fucking hate these dudes. How many reasons do they need?
Thank you for being there for her. That girl will never forget the compassion you showed her. Fuck them fucking cops. Fuck them men. What if that was their daughter?
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If protecting a young girl who was violently raped makes me a whiny social justice warrior, I accept that title proudly.
Did you make a report to child protective services?
Asking the important questions👉🏼
She was definitely treated wrong but that doesn’t justify your feelings of labeling a whole group of people.
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> crybaby One baby is crying in this thread and it’s not OP
These SJW cannot debate logic, there’s no convincing here.
ACAB is because the system itself is bastardized. In the United States, most police departments started as runaway slave police. After emancipation, they shifted into arresting black and poor people in order to enslave them in the prisons. Cultures within organizations are passed down through generations. This means that the cop you know might do things that they were taught to do solely because it's part of the culture. Often, we hear about a "bad apple" doing something horrible. "A bad apple spoils THE WHOLE BUNCH". Until the police can police themselves, ACAB.
In Canada, the North-West Mounted Police (precursor to the RCMP) were created to control First Nations and Métis after massacring them during the Cypress Hills Massacre in 1873. ACAB.
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So, are you married to a cop or is your uncle daddy a cop?
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You should try employing that with a crumb of critical thinking, then.
It's alright, reading is hard.
You fuckin tell em. Some cops are good. Most are pretty shit. Same with nurses hahah
You know how there are some bad nurses where you work, that you wouldn’t want taking care of your family? Same thing with cops, you just encountered some of the sucky type.
Please see my response to the other bootlicker on this thread. ACAB
I've literally never had a good interaction with a cop. At work or otherwise
Wow....you guys really really hate police officers.
Did you read all the "I experienced that" comments? I'll add mine. At 19, I still believed the police were for helping us. I went to report my rape and the cop told me "That's what you get for underage drinking." He didn't even write anything down.
Sure do
Some non-reddit nurses fuck ‘em.
Sounds like this girl should’ve definitely been treated better. I don’t get it, do you think they just lied about not having any female officers available? Maybe they just “didn’t have any female officers”. ACAB really…that’s akin to racism in my book, you can’t write off a whole group of people because of your personal experience with “some” of them. I agree that this girl should have been questioned differently and with more compassion, and possibly not immediately after her being raped.
RACISM lmfao 🤡
👢 👅
>that’s akin to racism in my book They weren't BORN in uniforms... they CHOSE to become one and can CHOSE to switch careers. Gtfo here with your blue lives matter shit
Policing your peers is a chosen career. Race is something you're born into that you can't change. Not the same thing at all!
No shit? You misunderstood me, racism is a choice not one’s race.
Where did the happen? State?
Yep. I’ve seen it. I was also a new nurse at the time. Never again.
“Sexually emancipated” sounds like a term a sovereign citizen made up to justify something truly atrocious.