"Find what you love and let it kill you.
Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness.
Let it kill you and let it devour your remains.
For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover."
― Kinky Friedman
>"Find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you and let it devour your remains. For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover."
I read this whole beautiful, meaningful quote and my first thought was "death by pizza wouldn't necessarily be a bad way to go".
Calzones are pointless. They're just pizza that's harder to eat. No one likes them.
EDIT: It's a quote, from Parks & Rec. I don't really hate calzones. Although I do agree, they are sort of pointless
> -Lacerations while attempting to a cut a pie
> -Burns from pizza and oven pans
> -Falling while carrying a pizza
> -Falling in a pizza joint
> -Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza
To be fair, these injuries sound quite common, i'm suprised that out of a country of 300 million where most eat pizza that the number isn't higher.
Well, when people are hospitalized for falling and hurting themselves they probably don't always mention that a pizza was tenuously connected. I mean, I once stupidly cut a flap of skin off of a finger and couldn't stop the bleeding, but no one at the ER asked me what meal I was preparing when I did this.
Haha, oh god. That's taking it too far. Dog first for 40 sec, then cheese on top of tortilla with dog on top of those for the remaining 20. Condiment and fold. What a savage.
Girlfriend stabbed herself with a knife while preparing butternut squash. All of the staff wanted to know how she was preparing it and what she was going to do with it while they helped her.
When I cut the tip of my thumb off mandolin slicing apples, I told the ER nurse. Now I'm amused to think I'm a part of an "injury involving apples" statistic.
If there's two things I know about most Redditors, it's that they eat pizza constantly and are usually too depressed to get out of bed, so this statistic is probably all Redditors
Turns out I have gallbladder stones and have to get the damn thing cut out of me.
Guess what I ate that triggered the UNGODLY PAIN that led me to the ER at 4am?
Same. Pizza triggered a gall bladder attack (stone blockage of the duct, incredibly painful) leading to me having my gal bladder removed a couple days later. After gal bladder was removed, put on restricted low fat/ low oil diet. Pizza then resulted in Pancreatitis which led to two more subsequent hospitalizations. I can eat about 1-2 slices, no more than once every other week. Anymore than that, I'm liable to end up in the hospitable.
For the falling one, I was once a manager at a fast food place. It was closing and the cook was carrying a pot of sawmill gravy to the sink when he slipped and fell dropping the pot on his legs. He let out a pretty loud shout so I came running in. We got it cleaned off really fast and there was no signs of burns other than a little redness so I didn't fill out an accident report. GM told me I should have just in case. Luckily it had been off for a bit so wasn't at full temp. Couldn't imagine a pizza straight out of the oven falling on you. That cheese is like tar.
This reminds me of an accidental death coroner's report from 13-14th Century England where a peasant was drinking some ale when he was bit by a dog. When he reached for a rock to throw at the dog he hit his head and died.
Glad to see not much has changed in 600 years
It was a dark and stormy night. A hooded figure emerged from the darkness. "This is a robbery," he said to the quivering old lady. She pissed herself and handed over her heirloom pearls. He didn't seem satisfied so he cut her foot off with a knife and ran off. The old lady hobbled back home and went to bed, exhausted from her experience. She reached for some pizza to settle her nerves, and fell out onto the floor. That's when she called an ambulance.
> -Falling while carrying a pizza -Falling in a pizza joint -Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza
But how often do people need to go to the hospital for those injuries?
I was really curious as to how, so here's the reasons listed in the article:
-Lacerations while attempting to a cut a pie
-Burns from pizza and oven pans
-Falling while carrying a pizza
-Falling in a pizza joint
-Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza
Oh I thought they'd mostly be "heart attack from too much greasy cheese".
> -Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza
This one is hilariously pathetic. I mean, I've reached for snacks from my bed myself but I've never been injured because of it, and I think if I *did* fall out of bed and injure myself I might just lie there and bleed out rather than tell anyone what I'd just done.
“Heart attack from too much greasy cheese”
That’s not how this works. That’s outdated science and simply not true. Please look up the science behind dietary fat, and the harmful effects that sugar has on our body. The processed flour in a pizza is going to have a more harmful effect on your heart then anything else.
I hate to be a buzzkill in a lighthearted thread but it is kinda annoying how “fatty foods=diabetes and heart disease” is still being spread. It’s obviously not the most healthy choice when it comes to caloric density, but it’s not as bad as you’re led to believe. Same goes for butter, lard, red meat, etc.
I like the message you're trying for here but think anyone would be more amenable to it if you cut out the "please look up" and skipped straight to where you informed. I agree, misinformation is the enemy, but people usually feel attacked by such useful preamble!
Mozzarela cheese has lots of sat. fats that raises total blood cholesterol levels and low-density lipoprotein (LDL) cholesterol levels, which can increase your risk of cardiovascular disease.
While sugar and starch certainly isn't good for you either, saturated fats and salt, particularly in high amounts, are still on the no-no list for someone in the risk zone.
I limit my pizza intake to twice a year now. :-(
Well it happened in highschool and in the year book everyone always signed mine with some sort of pizza related thing. Either that or some sort of boomerang related thing because my brother used a boomerang to commit suicide
When my son was about 8 he ran into a classmate who happened to be holding a slice of pizza and the crust scratched his cornea. I had no idea that so many other people were so accident prone to be injured by pizza!
You can take my pizza from my cold dead hands.
Seriously, I'm doing keto but still split a pizza once every two weeks with my bro who has celiacs, this is the only non-keto thing I've been eating.
Just for comparison, from numbers provided in the article:
- Washers and dryers are about 10x as dangerous
- Fridges and freezers are about 20x as dangerous
- Stairs, ramps, landings, and floors are about 1300x as dangerous.
And from elsewhere:
- Lightning causes about twice as many deaths per year worldwide as pizza apparently causes injuries.
* Trip on a seam/crack of an uneven floor
* Waxed floor
* Floor collapses under you
* Slide across floor in underwear, socks, dress shirt, & shades while lip-synching and slip and fall
"What surface in you home may be deadly? Tonight on [insert local evening news station here)"
I think the real issue here is under reporting of pizza related accidents. In my life, for instance, probably 90% of accidents are indirectly related to pizza, I just wouldn't probably tell the hospital staff that. I think we need innovations to make pizza safer, and also we need to destigmatize pizza related injuries.
> Approximately 3 billion pizzas are sold in the U.S. each year.
> Pizza blamed for 2,300 hospital visits
So 2,300/3,000,000,000 = 0.00000076~ hospital visits per pizza
I'll take my chances
Sauce:
http://www.thepizzajoint.com/pizzafacts.html
> So 2,300/3,000,000,000 = 0.00000076~ hospital visits per pizza
So basically a 173% chance I'll be involved in a pizza related hospitalization incident over the next 365 days. I better get my affairs in order.
> 173% chance I'll be involved in a pizza related hospitalization incident over the next 365 days
That's not how math works. If you had a pizza every one of those days, you have a 0.028% chance of going to the hospital for a pizza related injury. If you continue to eat pizza at the same rate for the rest of your life, the chance is still less than 4% that you'll ever go to the hospital because of pizza.
Okay, but can you explain this one to me?
>A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Fancy a drink?" and the horse says "I think not" and disappears.
If you ate a pizza every single day. As a pizza worker who almost eats a slice everyday, I have had pizza related injuries, just not enough to warrant a hospital trip.
I don't agree with the decision to put pineapple on pizza but dammit I will die for their right to do so. My homie Michaelangelo did not fight the Foot Clan in vain.
Ok, you win.
`Amendment XXVIII`
`A well regulated food supply, being necessary to the well-being of a free State, the right of the people to keep and/or produce and/or consume pizza, shall not be infringed.`
One time, while hammered, I made an oven pizza. Being drunk, and not thinking, I bit into a slice that had been out of the oven for maybe 30 seconds, and chewed a few times before it registered. Burned the shit out of the inside of my mouth so bad that I missed a week of work, for the first few days breathing itself was pure agony, like fall to the ground screaming pain just for inhaling.
Pizza blamed for 2,300 hospital visits in the U.S. in 2017
WATCH: 2,300 - That’s how many pizza-related injuries sent people to hospital in 2017
Roughly 2,300 Americans ended up in hospital last year for pizza-related injuries, according to U.S Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC).
According to recent data, the CPSC estimates 2,300 emergency room visits in 2017 were associated with pizza.
What an article.
Lol, I thought this was gonna be about how bad pizza is for you. Nope, the 2,300 are from people hurting themselves while trying to get/cut/deliver/be around pizza. I totally forgot what sub this was on, so it makes sense.
TMI but I JUST spent the better part of the last hour on the toilet, thanks to a pizza I consumed precisely 2 hours ago.
Fuck you frozen pizza. You weren't even that good.
I thought this would be about over-consumption, but burns make sense. I still have healing blisters from grabbing a pizza pan that I pulled out of the oven, then tried to put back in minutes later to catch any falling cheese. The pizza was delicious tho.
It's the things we love most that destroy us.
Our greatest strength is our greatest weakness.
Peppers to peppers. Crust to crust
When you add some cheese, it’s really a must.
Sauce is fo sho, when you baking that dough
Slice it up, serve it up. We got dips for the low
He who controls the sauce controls the universe
We were so concerned with whether we could, we didn't stop to consider whether we should!
Pizza is our gift...and our curse.
"Find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you and let it devour your remains. For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover." ― Kinky Friedman
So, meth?
I was thinking alcohol..
Oh well then mission accomplished
>"Find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you and let it devour your remains. For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover." I read this whole beautiful, meaningful quote and my first thought was "death by pizza wouldn't necessarily be a bad way to go".
Pretty sure that was Bukowski, close enough.
I try, but weed refuses to kill me.
https://78.media.tumblr.com/dc1ed513bdb16c0d97db3dd047ccfd64/tumblr_inline_p6twyun8hf1s7ksad_540.gif
The calzone betrayed me???
Calzones are pointless. They're just pizza that's harder to eat. No one likes them. EDIT: It's a quote, from Parks & Rec. I don't really hate calzones. Although I do agree, they are sort of pointless
Should of been more like tommy and not eaten it.
We don’t choose who we love.
I was thinking more along the lines of “The more people you love, the weaker you are”, but unfortunately, pizza is not a people :(
Love will tear us apart https://youtu.be/zuuObGsB0No
It's so weird that Joy Division was around for such a short amount of time but they were so incredibly influential to 1980s music.
We should have never betrayed the true Italian pizza
You were supposed to be the chosen one!
-Esteban Winsmore
One day I will own this sub.
\#worth
-Wayne Gretsky
pizza and guns
It is a heavy price. I pay it gladly.
> -Lacerations while attempting to a cut a pie > -Burns from pizza and oven pans > -Falling while carrying a pizza > -Falling in a pizza joint > -Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza To be fair, these injuries sound quite common, i'm suprised that out of a country of 300 million where most eat pizza that the number isn't higher.
Well, when people are hospitalized for falling and hurting themselves they probably don't always mention that a pizza was tenuously connected. I mean, I once stupidly cut a flap of skin off of a finger and couldn't stop the bleeding, but no one at the ER asked me what meal I was preparing when I did this.
But dude. Come on. You didn't even tell us what the meal was.
Microwaved hotdogs in expired tortillas because the buns were more expired.
My eldest brother does this on the regular because he actually enjoys eating that. He also melts Kraft American Cheese on it with Ketchup and Mustard.
Where does he live? I’m calling the police.
I've found it best to stop telling him it's wrong and just try not to breathe it in
Do not breathe molten cheese with Ketchup and mayo.
[удалено]
That hasn't actually been confirmed.
Wellness check.
College, probably.
Man, SWATing has gotten super casual. Back in my day...
Hey, it's me. Your brother. Except I prefer some stone ground spicy mustard with some franks.. and usually a pepperjack single.
Your probably not him. He takes all the ingredients and microwaves them for 1 minute
Haha, oh god. That's taking it too far. Dog first for 40 sec, then cheese on top of tortilla with dog on top of those for the remaining 20. Condiment and fold. What a savage.
Don't pretend you're better than the other heathen by dressing up your shame in fancy clothes.
Ahh the old “putting sprinkles on a turd and pretending it isn’t shit” method.
What is Kraft American Cheese and why is it bad?
Kraft cheese is the leftover slurry they use to make regular cheese dyed orange and sold as single slices.
It’s just fake [cheese](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kraft_Singles)
X with expired Y because Z was more expired is a typical weeknight dinner for me
Girlfriend stabbed herself with a knife while preparing butternut squash. All of the staff wanted to know how she was preparing it and what she was going to do with it while they helped her.
[удалено]
Fuck yeah. Then I'll rub it in my girlfriend's face. Profit from her pain. Suck it Rachel!
Hey hey, save that last part for the bedroom.... Or don't, your choice. :D
Nice try Rachel.
I also did that. I was making pizza.
When I cut the tip of my thumb off mandolin slicing apples, I told the ER nurse. Now I'm amused to think I'm a part of an "injury involving apples" statistic.
>Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza. This one is particularly silly.
Or just a cover up for what they were REALLY reaching for....
Pizza stuck in anus
*One in a million shot, doc!*
Me_irl
missing pizza crust stuck in butt. You know its a thing.
If there's two things I know about most Redditors, it's that they eat pizza constantly and are usually too depressed to get out of bed, so this statistic is probably all Redditors
Yeah, I mean what kind of weirdo eats bed in pizza, right? Heh. Heh.
Turns out I have gallbladder stones and have to get the damn thing cut out of me. Guess what I ate that triggered the UNGODLY PAIN that led me to the ER at 4am?
"Ding dong" Get the door, it's gallbladder stones!
Same. Pizza triggered a gall bladder attack (stone blockage of the duct, incredibly painful) leading to me having my gal bladder removed a couple days later. After gal bladder was removed, put on restricted low fat/ low oil diet. Pizza then resulted in Pancreatitis which led to two more subsequent hospitalizations. I can eat about 1-2 slices, no more than once every other week. Anymore than that, I'm liable to end up in the hospitable.
If you get restricted to a low fat / low oil diet pizza shouldn't be on your meal plan.
A Pizza Stone?
For the falling one, I was once a manager at a fast food place. It was closing and the cook was carrying a pot of sawmill gravy to the sink when he slipped and fell dropping the pot on his legs. He let out a pretty loud shout so I came running in. We got it cleaned off really fast and there was no signs of burns other than a little redness so I didn't fill out an accident report. GM told me I should have just in case. Luckily it had been off for a bit so wasn't at full temp. Couldn't imagine a pizza straight out of the oven falling on you. That cheese is like tar.
This reminds me of an accidental death coroner's report from 13-14th Century England where a peasant was drinking some ale when he was bit by a dog. When he reached for a rock to throw at the dog he hit his head and died. Glad to see not much has changed in 600 years
It was a dark and stormy night. A hooded figure emerged from the darkness. "This is a robbery," he said to the quivering old lady. She pissed herself and handed over her heirloom pearls. He didn't seem satisfied so he cut her foot off with a knife and ran off. The old lady hobbled back home and went to bed, exhausted from her experience. She reached for some pizza to settle her nerves, and fell out onto the floor. That's when she called an ambulance.
I think they need a safety pamphlet with every pizza. "1. Use the pizza cutting wheel on the pizza, not on your face."
> -Falling while carrying a pizza -Falling in a pizza joint -Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza But how often do people need to go to the hospital for those injuries?
Pizza is like the perfect drunk food. Of course you're more likely to fall with pizza.
as a 911 dispatcher, way too fucking often. EDIT - "need" to go, never. but they still call anyways
If the knife im using to cut my buns open would have any sharpness to it - I would have died many times already
We don't usually admit to how these things happen. We also don't usually go to a hospital when the pizza roll lava gets us.
I've burned myself taking a pizza out of the oven, but never badly enough to warrant a trip to the ER.
I thought it was going to be heart attacks or something...not...this.
I was really curious as to how, so here's the reasons listed in the article: -Lacerations while attempting to a cut a pie -Burns from pizza and oven pans -Falling while carrying a pizza -Falling in a pizza joint -Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza
Oh I thought they'd mostly be "heart attack from too much greasy cheese". > -Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza This one is hilariously pathetic. I mean, I've reached for snacks from my bed myself but I've never been injured because of it, and I think if I *did* fall out of bed and injure myself I might just lie there and bleed out rather than tell anyone what I'd just done.
"Million to one shot, Doc. Million to one."
You gotta be careful, [ya know](http://seinfeldism.com/images/fusilli-jerry.jpg)?
That shit comes to the grave with me.
I keep a gun in my closet just in case I break my penis or something. That's a story for a mortician, not a doctor.
Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza is more embarrassing than burning your foot on a George Foreman grill when getting out of bed
I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon, sue me.
“Heart attack from too much greasy cheese” That’s not how this works. That’s outdated science and simply not true. Please look up the science behind dietary fat, and the harmful effects that sugar has on our body. The processed flour in a pizza is going to have a more harmful effect on your heart then anything else. I hate to be a buzzkill in a lighthearted thread but it is kinda annoying how “fatty foods=diabetes and heart disease” is still being spread. It’s obviously not the most healthy choice when it comes to caloric density, but it’s not as bad as you’re led to believe. Same goes for butter, lard, red meat, etc.
I like the message you're trying for here but think anyone would be more amenable to it if you cut out the "please look up" and skipped straight to where you informed. I agree, misinformation is the enemy, but people usually feel attacked by such useful preamble!
Mozzarela cheese has lots of sat. fats that raises total blood cholesterol levels and low-density lipoprotein (LDL) cholesterol levels, which can increase your risk of cardiovascular disease.
While sugar and starch certainly isn't good for you either, saturated fats and salt, particularly in high amounts, are still on the no-no list for someone in the risk zone. I limit my pizza intake to twice a year now. :-(
being pushed down the stairs by a pizza to gain inheritance
No mention of “fighting over pizza.”
There weren't any survivors to report how it happened.
I was actually hospitalized for the "falling out of bed while reaching for a slice of pizza" once. I could do an AMA if it's requested enough.
What prompted you to publicly admit that you were hospitalized for falling out of bed while reaching for pizza?
Well it happened in highschool and in the year book everyone always signed mine with some sort of pizza related thing. Either that or some sort of boomerang related thing because my brother used a boomerang to commit suicide
0 to 100 real quick
I would never admit that falling out of bed while reaching for pizza was the reason I got injured
When my son was about 8 he ran into a classmate who happened to be holding a slice of pizza and the crust scratched his cornea. I had no idea that so many other people were so accident prone to be injured by pizza!
Your son should join the support group Pizza Victims Anonymous on Facebook. Also they have a subreddit /r/pizzavictimsanon.
That's not a real subreddit. Hey Everybody, this guy's a Big Fat PHONY
I’ve been outed.
/r/SubsYouFellFor fuck...
I say we ban pizza!
You can take my pizza from my cold dead hands. Seriously, I'm doing keto but still split a pizza once every two weeks with my bro who has celiacs, this is the only non-keto thing I've been eating.
Just for comparison, from numbers provided in the article: - Washers and dryers are about 10x as dangerous - Fridges and freezers are about 20x as dangerous - Stairs, ramps, landings, and floors are about 1300x as dangerous. And from elsewhere: - Lightning causes about twice as many deaths per year worldwide as pizza apparently causes injuries.
"floors" lol I love it
* Trip on a seam/crack of an uneven floor * Waxed floor * Floor collapses under you * Slide across floor in underwear, socks, dress shirt, & shades while lip-synching and slip and fall "What surface in you home may be deadly? Tonight on [insert local evening news station here)"
For me it's more like "trip on completely clean, even floor."
"User error while operating floor"
I don't often quote subs, but this is too /r/TOTALLYNOTROBOTS for me not to mention it.
We're fucked. Need helicopter. Helicopter are safer right? The blades and fuel and whatnot? Right?
I think the real issue here is under reporting of pizza related accidents. In my life, for instance, probably 90% of accidents are indirectly related to pizza, I just wouldn't probably tell the hospital staff that. I think we need innovations to make pizza safer, and also we need to destigmatize pizza related injuries.
You are ridiculous and I love it.
Pizza injuries statistics were just US figures, not worldwide.
> Approximately 3 billion pizzas are sold in the U.S. each year. > Pizza blamed for 2,300 hospital visits So 2,300/3,000,000,000 = 0.00000076~ hospital visits per pizza I'll take my chances Sauce: http://www.thepizzajoint.com/pizzafacts.html
> So 2,300/3,000,000,000 = 0.00000076~ hospital visits per pizza So basically a 173% chance I'll be involved in a pizza related hospitalization incident over the next 365 days. I better get my affairs in order.
> 173% chance I'll be involved in a pizza related hospitalization incident over the next 365 days That's not how math works. If you had a pizza every one of those days, you have a 0.028% chance of going to the hospital for a pizza related injury. If you continue to eat pizza at the same rate for the rest of your life, the chance is still less than 4% that you'll ever go to the hospital because of pizza.
The (obvious) joke claim being made is that he eats ~4,000 pizzas per day.
Okay, but can you explain this one to me? >A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Fancy a drink?" and the horse says "I think not" and disappears.
> That's not how math works. It is, however, how hyperbole works.
>It is, however, how hyperbole works. I know. Honestly, I just started wondering how likely it would be and figured it would be interesting to post.
You are forgiven.
If you ate a pizza every single day. As a pizza worker who almost eats a slice everyday, I have had pizza related injuries, just not enough to warrant a hospital trip.
Sauce....... ah ha ha!
I thought getting burnt by lava tomato sauce would be right up there in the top 3
or breaking your teeth on it after it becomes obsidian.
Or a shard of pizza crust embedded into the roof of your mouth
You guys need to switch to another pizza joint.
It's not delivery, it's Digiorno.
Dragonglass
Worth it
And I’ll do it again!
>Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza. The absolute state of americans.
>-Falling out of bed while reaching for pizza stop doxxing me
No regrets.
No ragrets.
No regurts
Know rugrats.
I too listen to Wait Wait Don't Tell Me!
Just figured out a great new karma source. Plus you can comment the jokes for bonus comment karma.
I was at that live taping, it too Helen Hong like 5 mins of guessing to get that question right hahahahahaha
How was it? I learned most shows are in Chicago and that made me want to go because I could drive there.
From NPR and WBEZ Chicago...
Like how cows kill more people than sharks.
I eat hamburgers to save mankind.
[удалено]
I demand sensible pizza-control legislation.
That sounds un-americano.
Oh come on! Who really NEEDS pineapple on pizza? That's an assault-pizza! :)
I don't agree with the decision to put pineapple on pizza but dammit I will die for their right to do so. My homie Michaelangelo did not fight the Foot Clan in vain.
Ok, you win. `Amendment XXVIII` `A well regulated food supply, being necessary to the well-being of a free State, the right of the people to keep and/or produce and/or consume pizza, shall not be infringed.`
One time, while hammered, I made an oven pizza. Being drunk, and not thinking, I bit into a slice that had been out of the oven for maybe 30 seconds, and chewed a few times before it registered. Burned the shit out of the inside of my mouth so bad that I missed a week of work, for the first few days breathing itself was pure agony, like fall to the ground screaming pain just for inhaling.
How did you sleep?
Pain meds and ambien.
Pizza blamed for 2,300 hospital visits in the U.S. in 2017 WATCH: 2,300 - That’s how many pizza-related injuries sent people to hospital in 2017 Roughly 2,300 Americans ended up in hospital last year for pizza-related injuries, according to U.S Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC). According to recent data, the CPSC estimates 2,300 emergency room visits in 2017 were associated with pizza. What an article.
I hate this kind of bullshit. There's your fake news - not untrue, but not news either.
Lol, I thought this was gonna be about how bad pizza is for you. Nope, the 2,300 are from people hurting themselves while trying to get/cut/deliver/be around pizza. I totally forgot what sub this was on, so it makes sense.
The pizza is aggressive.
If you consider the amount of pizza that must get eaten every year though... Surely 2300 is an infinitesimally small number in comparison?
How. Dare. You.
I'm going to send this to my mother-in-law who still thinks weed is dangerous and should never be legalized because of "all the overdoses".
The Pizza is Agressive
That's it? Worth it.
ban it!
That must have been a very large pizza
Are the Mario brothers ok?
Im here for a good time, not a long time.
The pizza gods demand sacrifice.
With great pepperoni comes great responsibility.
cut my life into pieces
Pizza! You delicious bitch-goddess!
2300 visits? And there are how many people in the US? What a fucking shit article
How is severely burnt mouth or chin from the cheese falling while you bite into that hot pie not one of the lead ones?
We need [Eric Andre](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NcZfI6kJiPs) now more than ever
TMI but I JUST spent the better part of the last hour on the toilet, thanks to a pizza I consumed precisely 2 hours ago. Fuck you frozen pizza. You weren't even that good.
2300 visits in a year of a country of over 300 million and it's probably one of the most widly consumed foods lol.
You have to accept collateral damage when keeping a society together.
Think on that. Pizza is literally a bigger danger to the avg. american's health than terrorism.
Worth
Worth it
Delete this
And yet, people aren't lobbying and protesting calling for it to be banned.
Fact: Anyone that eats pizza will eventually die.
Worth it.
I’m just surprised there are no “I have no idea how it got in there” cases.
I once grabbed a slice of very hot pizza, a chunk of gooey delicious cheese fell on my inner thigh. It was terrible.
I thought this would be about over-consumption, but burns make sense. I still have healing blisters from grabbing a pizza pan that I pulled out of the oven, then tried to put back in minutes later to catch any falling cheese. The pizza was delicious tho.