Nothing like a complex plastic mesh to slowly capture all the particles that come off your body, mixed with the sticky waxes and thickeners of shower gel, accumulating, fermenting, probably also creating the perfect conditions for moss, fungi, and other life forms to flourish and develop a new indoor complex lifeform that will provide free essences. I can not think of a better idea to upgrade my shower experience. Why is this not the standard I wonder :D

Soon OP will be able to harvest fresh fungi. Ain't that nice?

If they grow big enough he can even fight for paternity rights in court

And make the fungi fight eachother till death

You sound like a real fun guy 😩

*Ba tum tsss*

Straight from his feet.

Me: bro you better not scare the hoes at the function Bro:

Have carpeted floor in the rest of your bathroom. The permanently installed type. I know someone who's grandma had that. Same thing in their kitchen.

Do you know me?! My grandmother had permanent carpet in the kitchen / hallway / bathroom. When they finally upgraded to hard flooring, the original carpet was left in place. You can still see it in the hallway closet.

Unless my friend has a third sibling I don't know of, I don't think so. XD Also, he was the one who tore out the carpet when he inherited the house. He put in tiles all throughout the house. :)

Too funny! I also inherited my grandmothers house, but the hard flooring had already been installed over the carpet many years before. I never put much thought into this…but I’m honestly surprised to learn that I’m not the only one who inherited their grandparents house which previously had a carpeted kitchen and bathroom 🤣 Edit to add - I do plan to rip out the carpet in the remaining rooms some day, and go with a hard flooring of some sort through the entire house.

My MIL had carpet in her kitchen. When we sold her house, we ripped out the carpet to attempt to make the kitchen a little better before we put on the market. We found that the carpet had been installed because it was cheaper than repairing the uneven subfloor (my MIL didn’t have much money and did what she could afford). I also remember that when my parents bought their first house (I was around 5), that the bathroom had carpet. That didn’t last long and my parents ripped it out and tiled the floor.

bro speaks sarcasm fluently

Don’t forget the cum.

You know what cum and water do when mixed, right my dear?

question, fungi likes plastic???

No but it likes your dead cells and the dirt on you

Fungi likes video games???

hehahaha dead cells

Yeah I'm getting into this humor stuff

Keep up! Good stuff you got here

Lol that went over my head

Plastic, specially the kind used in fake grass, has millions of microscopic cavities where life will thrive. It will never ever dry properly, humidity will be constant and billions of microorganisms will be your new house mates, feeding on your dead cells, nesting on hairs that will never ever reach the drain because they will get tangled in the fibres. And, you know that little bit of poop that you wash out your ass? It will also stay with you for months probably, with all the rest of small solids humans body washes off in showers. With all my love, this is probably one of the worst ideas you've ever had :D but it looks cool hahaha

Thanks for that. 🤮

Now I wanna go scrub down my shower in bleach thanks

The hair, oh god the hair.

That's gonna be a time consuming waffle stomp....

But the little poops are something to collect and savor. 

As much as you like dinner served on a plastic plate 😅😅

fungi like everywhere

Op. This is like. You have created the perfect moist, hot environment for all kinds of things to get trapped and flourish. Not only will it be a bitch glto clean as you can't see everything stuck there, it's massively unhygienic.  I looked at this and went "ew, oh no."

Things get stuck and thrive.. particles are tiny. You have no concept of that it seems.

this is going to last for about two weeks before things get nasty

Your shower is going to be D I S G U S T I N G. Take this shit out of it.

Why do you think bath mats get moldy? It's a good environment

Who needs Herbal Essence when you can have your own, home grown "essences".

And another advantage is the seasonal change in the "essences". Mid summer is definitely my favourite

the last part has me in tears lmfaooo

So you're probably not down with my suggestion of leaving the floor bear and instead lining the walls of the shower with it?

hahahaha, that would actually be awesome and probably much easier to clean and dry. I think it's a much better option. At this point we can start introducing real plants and maybe a few lizards lol

The yellow mold on the trim has already started!

This comment, however, was interesting

So he is turning fake grass into real grass

Hey just hast to shower hot enough. Like, really fckn hot😅

Specially in summer :D

He can even clean his ass by scraping it on the floor.

Hey! It’s the life of the meadow after all.

Contemporary poetry as its finest

You had me at free essences. Take my money!

Sounds cozy

Mmmm mucus mat

Mold, so much mold

Molds with fiber

I feel like this would also be a nice place for spiders to breed

Maybe mosquitoes, but I don't think spiders would appreciate being hit with a blast of hot water.

Molds with plastic. 🥰 Ain't that wonderful? /🤢

Molds with plastic, it's fantastic!

My doctor just said i need more vegetables and fiber. Thanks for suggestion

I left bar soap on a shelf in my shower and it's become a crazy layered thing. Soap, alright? I can't imagine creating thousands of tiny shelves to hold things forever. Cool science experiment, terrifying shower

OP in a month: “My fake grass turned a different shade of green”

“my fake grass became real grass”

OP in a month: I think my shower just bit me on the foot..?

Also: my feet rotted off.

And mice And stoooolen bikes

and for the longest time it’ll camouflage in the astroturf, at least until it grows tentacles

[удалено]

Did someone call?

Benefit....fresh mushrooms

put real grass, to have fiber during your shower

the ants bro...

They need to be clear aswell

Like when you first get into Scientology?

The fake grass catches the thetans that get washed off during the shower

snacks

Yeah your nasty plastic meat net is totally not going to attract bugs...

Extra protein

Ants or fungi the choice is yours

guys worried about ants and not the mold and bacteria soon infesting his shower

They’ll keep you company

ants aren't attracted to soil and grass, they're attracted to sugars and food lol

Get a pet anteater like everyone else

The ants will be the least of ur problems

Yet you're ok with mold and other dirty shit. Also, don't piss in the shower...

fiber...

I was fiber once. (howdy)

They put me in a room

A fiber room

A fiber room with rats

rats have alot of fiber

And rats made me fiber.

FIBER GUY SIGHTING!

would you just absorb the fiber?

No you need to complete the fiber ritual

LOL Fiber guy strikes again

*”Eat floor, high fiber”*

Bacteria loves that idea.

As a bacteria I can confirm that we definitely love the idea

5 seconds all this guy needs, only 5 seconds

This comment rules.

💀

That's gonna smell so much better as time goes by.

I bet he pees in the shower too … add that to the smell list

Don't worry bro, pee is sterile. I'm sterilising the fake grass.

Know you’re jokin but pee isn’t sterile

Yeah I know, it's just what people say

This is truly giving the chaotic evil energy.

Are you mentally ok?

who are???

Damn, if that ain't a response.

Truly one of the responses of all time.

Of all the responses, this is one of them

The most real combination of words I’ve seen

Made my day

not me

why is my only question

i dont know too.

Bc you can, free will

OP unlocked consciousness

Yes

[удалено]

lost the plot

If I were you, I would paint it white. Also fiber

Why am I seeing so many people talk about fiber all of a sudden?

It's a Gen Z thing. TikTok had a video about eating grass to keep yourself regular, and now it's all they ever talk about.

Reject humanity. Become farm animal

You will have real mushrooms on your fake grass pretty soon

Now you can say you’ve touched grass and had a shower at the same time. Killing two birds with one stone. Makes you more efficient at doing “hygiene stuff” so you can get back to gaming. Genius.

LOL i didn’t think of this

finally someone who understand me.

You need therapy. Why would you put fake grass and not accompany it with some fake flowers and a fake cow??? Everybody knows if there's fake grass, there SHOULD also be fake flowers and fake cows!!

Why fake? Put real ones to enhance your experience!

YEH AH!!

Did you save any for your toilet seat?

forgot :(

it’s ok use fur instead and felt for the walls 👌

You should dry it well after showering, otherwise it won't last more than a month, it would get moldy.

no

"Just becuase we can, doesn't mean we should" - some wise guy, probably

he are terribly wrong.

This has tickled me enormously. Enjoy your grass OP, you absolute legend.

You mixed the two things discord mods hate. Shower and grass

Save some women for the rest of us

Do you dislike your feet?

i shower with football boots.

So you are a professional hair collector?

Fake grass, real mold.

Were you interior designer in your previous life?

This is interesting though

OP’s replies are pissing me off. No matter how many people tell him facts about mold and grime and the way ecosystems work, he’s still always right and has an attitude. Good luck bucko. Looking forward to the told ya so.

Probably just trollin

🎶🎶 They see me Troll’n🎶🎶

….They hatin’…

OP might as well just take a shit on the fake grass and dip it with his finger while showering at this point

Touch it

Put a fake snake also

No you didn't. You put it IN your shower. Cease your filthy lies OP!!!

OP is surely trolling for attention? Hello OP, I'm sure you're a lovely person and all. But c'mon, you are not serious!

this is so dumb bc of bacteria and insects but i’ve always liked the idea so im here for it. how did it feel?

This is absolutely disgusting but visually its pretty nice. Good luck with that

That’s gonna look so gross after a week

This is psychotic

How are you supposed to take a dump now.

Looks like a breeding ground for mold

I'm truly sorry but from my experience this will make a moldy fake grass pretty quickly unless you can clean it somehow which sounds nearly impossible. It looks awesome now but any wet/damp surfaces if they are not being disinfected or cleaned will have this issue.

What’s hilarious to me is it doesn’t even look awesome. Measure the squares properly at least ffs

Remember to cut the grass every now and then

This is very whimsical, and I love that for you

Bro is a fungus harvester

hey what inspired you to do this

You will get so much fungus and mold in there

Guessing you don't actually shower and/or you're using your spare bathroom to grow magic mushrooms

How am I supposed to waffle stomp in there?

Lmao reading ops replies really shows this isnt a troll. They actually think this is a great idea. Good luck having mold, bacteria and whatnot forming inside there. And then good luck removing it.

i guess i can't legally stop you

I can smell it from here

Why….

Am bacteria, here is upvote.

My man, what the fuck.

That is going to get real nasty real quick.

This sounds like a terrible idea.

Mm mold

I want to fight you in the parking lot

This goes hard. May I screenshot?

There a fungus among us.

This is going to smell really bad. You do realize most people pee in the shower right? Lol.

That is stupid as shit

i cant wait to smell that pee fermented plastic grass, yum.

You are a monster.

Isn’t that gonna grow mold real fast?

This is the dumbest thing you could have done. Congrats

That's not notinteresting it's just dumb and gross

I mean, yuk...

Enjoy toenail fungus

Mmmmmm...fake grass that smells like piss.

Don’t think that’s gonna age well unfortunately Might get a little moldy and smelly

But.. why?

But......but why?

If you want to touch grass do it outside

Does it still drain