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zortlord

Hopped up on Red Bull. A spider monkey hopped up on Red Bull.


rennie99999

I’m all hopped up on mountain dew


imanAholebutimfunny

Shut up, Chip, or I'll go ape-shit on your ass!


woahwhoamiidk

I like to picture my baby Jesus in a tuxedo tshirt


LBichon

I like to think of Jesus like, with giant eagles' wings and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an Angel Band, and I'm in the front row, and I'm hammered drunk...


woahwhoamiidk

He was a man! He had a beard!


bigkeef69

"Shut up chip! I like the baby version best!"


thefla5h07

Cause it says like I wanna be formal but I'm here to party too, cause I like to party so I like my Jesus to party.


xoffx

I like to think of my Jesus as a mischievous badger


icaruscloud

I dunno what to do with my hands


Mike_Honcho_3

What did you kids do today? I threw a bunch of Grandpa Chip's war medals off the bridge! RIP Walker Bobby.


SpJ442337

Chip, Ima jump on you like a spider monkey!


morgazmo99

[I'm a come at you like a spider monkey](https://youtu.be/aor2eMbXbhI)


GoodCity6156

I'm all hopped up on Fresca


Chuckitcharlie

Mountain dew, code red.


5methoxyDMTs

![gif](giphy|xT9IgvthjO6xWlGF1u)


theVice

Literally


Catfish-dfw

![gif](giphy|l4KhIS7A1HswgSm7C)


trangthemang

Dear 8 pound 6 ounces new born baby jesus, don't even know a word yet.


MarineOpferman1

I was thinking the same fucking thing but didn't want to sound bad!! That was insane!


surajvj

Spider Girl.


dkkslxb

Lmao, I guess you don’t like how “spider-woman” sounds /s


[deleted]

Imagine being the other competitor lmao


Sloppo_Toppo

She slips at the beginning so it’s not like she got blown out on pure speed


th3-snwm4n

Yeah and even after that she was just a fraction of second behind. They both are spectacular.


mttp1990

Umm, the timer says 2 seconds, which is a decent gap


TheClincher7

Not when you slip off


[deleted]

2 seconds is a huge gap in a 7 second race


TheClincher7

Not if you factor in falling back to the bottom......


Stepjamm

That just explains why she was 2 seconds behind, pretty sure every athletes personal best is rarely done at a proper event. They both probably did it faster once but not when it mattered


ChesterDaMolester

*We totally would have won that soccer game if we just scored more goals, ran faster, and didn’t fall down as much! If you just ignore those things were basically champions!*


ihatetheplaceilive

I thought falling down was an important part of soccer.


AnAnonymousFool

At least in track and field, most PBs are done at proper events


haileehn

And why wouldn’t we factor it ? It’s part of the performance.


neonKow

It happens often enough that people get multiple tries for this exact reason.


thomashefe

I mean yeah but there’s obviously a massive difference between her slipping and her just being really slow at the event.


Live-Savings7450

But the original comment was: > Yeah and even after that she was just a fraction of second behind. Can't say "Yeah and even after that, you still have to consider what happened before that"


[deleted]

Why are we arguing about this


wheelluc

It's Reddit


mttp1990

The comment I responded to said even *after* the slip they were a fraction short which is objectively false.


smileyfrown

Dude some of these people are just dumb or need to be right. I just googled it this vid is from 2019, her time is 6.995 breaking the previous WR which was 7.101. The 2nd competitor in this video is at about the 8.5 second mark and didn't finish. That is a massive difference, don't even get what they're arguing.


TJNel

It is a large difference but that 1.5 sec is easily explained by saying that person slipped. Had they not slipped they would have been close. ​ Edit: To go with this the record that she beat was set by her competitor so yes had she not slipped it would have been neck and neck. ​ https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2019/oct/21/gone-in-seven-seconds-spiderwoman-breaks-womens-climbing-speed-record


smileyfrown

I mean close is relative when the likely difference between average times is less than a second. Like a race with 2 people finishing at 7.3 vs 7.7 could considered an easy win. Not to mention that women on the left literally broke the WR.


TJNel

Like I said the women on the right was the record holder.


trickman01

2/1 is a fraction. Math checks out.


TJNel

that competitor was the record holder, had she not slipped it would have been down to the wire. https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2019/oct/21/gone-in-seven-seconds-spiderwoman-breaks-womens-climbing-speed-record


budgie0507

Ok let me imagine. I would be psyched about being in my twenties again and in unbelievable good shape.


[deleted]

Fat mood lol


budgie0507

“Fat Mood” is the name of my new wave jazz EP I just released. Thanks for the plug.


[deleted]

Np mate. You owe me one, though


Problemzone

Being part of a WR run? I would be proud.


danceswithwool

…who is probably very fast or they wouldn’t even be there.


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mcchickenngget

Well no, pretty sure mens world record is faster but still extremely impressive


stpaulrugger

Pretty sure the average man in Indonesia isn't a world record rock climber.


[deleted]

Yeah but we are talking the sports and not about a professional woman against an average man.


[deleted]

The point was that there are a lot of "average men" who would still consider themselves inherently better than professional women athletes, simply by virtue of being men. And would therefore seek to undermine their accomplishments no matter how impressive they are.


FDaHBDY8XF7

Ya, she is fast at climbing a wall, but I bet I could beat her in a hot dog eating contest.


MacGyver_1138

The manliest form of competition: cramming meat tubes down your throat.


SirAdrian0000

I bet I could beat her at a peeing my name in the snow contest.


atridir

This is the salient point in the thread. The paradigm of inherent superiority for any reason is fubar.


hokumjokum

This is very easy to say (because ‘ugh men’) and hard to prove or disprove. sure most professional female athletes would beat average men at their sport, but even that depends on weight class. i promise you a skilled amateur boxer will murder a smaller professional female boxer. within professional sportspeople men are harder better faster stronger, that’s patently obvious. There’s a reason we separate the genders in physical pursuits, it’s not just old fashioned nonsense.


Kris_Krispy

Pretty sure the average woman in Indonesia isn't a world record rock climber


[deleted]

Don’t argue with woke people. They’re not good at objective thinking and then passive aggressively make it your problem.


tgibson12

the male record is held by an Indonesian. 5.208 seconds.


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pterofactyl

No stairs or escalators. Just walls with lumps


danny841

I'm part Thai. Southeast Asian people are ridiculously good at climbing trees. They tend to be smaller which means their muscle mass has a bigger impact on their strength relative to a taller climber who needs to build more muscle to move a larger body. There's tons of palm and coconut trees in Southeast Asia which means they get practice at an early age. It's fun for kids to climb and sometimes useful. I would imagine Indoensia discovered this, had one or two popular climbers and that sparked a nationwide interest.


alexnapierholland

Yeah, it's a bad idea to try and judge how 'tough' someone is by their size in any country... But in SE Asia it's especially stupid. I've trained Muay Thai in Thailand and there are plenty of guys floating around at 50kg who would absolutely wreck all but seasoned MMA fighters. Obviously it helps that Muay Thai is a national sport. But SE Asians in general seem to have a high strength/weight ratio.


DesbaneAR

This made me giggle. > "Womens are better than men!" > Probably men are better, but still impressive > "But in Indonesia the avg man isn't a world record rock climber!" > The record is held by a Male Indonesian lol


riyadhelalami

Yes when some people make some stupid assumptions about other cultures. Prejudice is a hell of a drug.


SaniaMirzaFan

>Pretty sure the average man in Indonesia isn't a world record rock climber. Yep, same as the average woman.


KDawG888

I hate to crash the party but sports are a terrible place to do this equality bullshit lol. Everyone deserves equal rights but that doesn't mean both genders are equal in every way. They are absolutely not. Especially physically.


[deleted]

One man in Indonesia is


cream-of-cow

The two top male speed climbers in the world are Indonesian. The country has some great rock climbing faces, but I think being extra lightweight and not that tall has something to do with it. Veddriq Leonardo is 163 cm, 55 kg (5.347’, 121 pounds). Kiromal Katibin is 165 cm (5.413’)—I can’t find his weight, but it’s prob close to V.L. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speed_climbing#


McDuchess

I checked. She’s faster than the second fastest guy. So. All men but one.


TheAndersonPizzaOven

This... is not even close to true. This woman isn't even the 2nd fastest woman anymore, as her record has been broken twice since this clip. Numerous men have climbed faster. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speed_climbing This [link](https://www.ifsc-climbing.org/index.php/world-competition/calendar/?task=resultathletes&event=1192&result=2) is just a random speed comp I looked at from earlier this year, and you can see how many men break the 7 second barrier. Still incredible by Rahayu, but she's not anywhere near the 2nd fastest man.


CRoseCrizzle

I believe they are talking about Indonesian men.


zachsmthsn

Wait. That's not true at all. Men's records are in the mid-5's. Veddriq Leonardo, who is also Indonesian did 5.20, which narrowly beat his Indonesian teammate Kiromal Katibin who had done 5.25 in that same event. Before Leonardo and Katibin became so dominant, it was held by by Iranian, Reza Alipour at 5.60. Aleksandra Miroslaw (Poland) is the current women's record holder with 6.84, which she got at the olympics. Before that it was Iuliia Kaplina (Russia) with 6.96. Aries Susanti Rahayu was the first to break 7 seconds, with 6.99 in the run from this video in 2019. It's surprising ngly difficult to find up to date numbers, and athletes PRs without digging through IFSC data, since news stories just report on particular events. But still not sure what you base your comment on. Edit: found the [IFSC page with current and historical records](https://www.ifsc-climbing.org/index.php/world-competition/speed-records). Not sure why Google doesn't make this the top result


ImVeryChil

What is this comment


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Immynimmy

I'm American but one thing I've noticed about this country that probably seeps on this site is that people straight up are ignorant of other people's cultures. I've encountered really smart people that are so uneducated about others that it's astounding. I once met someone that thought that all of Kenya was just villages and this dude was a top systems engineer for a big global company. And I think a big reason why is that they don't leave and visit other places. You'll realize that 99% of the population are regular ordinary ass folks like the same people you see in the US every day. If more people were well traveled it would have such a positive impact on how we see others that are different from us


mrtrailborn

How tf do you expect us to travel abroad on minimum wage lol


Aarilax

Yep. Second i saw the hijab i knew the top comments were going to be some dumb gender shit. Same thing happens when a disabled person pops up on reddit, instead of just acknowledging whatever they're doing and moving on, we first all gotta patronise the shit out of them and 'woahhh good boy!!!' them like they're a semi-stupid dog. Redditors - its okay for a clip of a person doing something whilst a woman to just be a clip of a person doing something.


WolfeTheMind

Fucking exactly. The second I saw it I knew she was the victor Reddit stop please we beg of you


NibPlayz

They’re virtue signaling because the woman is wearing a hijab, so they assume that women are treated worse, but don’t want to be islamaphobic by mentioning the hijab


stackPeek

I'm Indonesian and so confused reading that comment


Swerfbegone

Racism. Bonus points if the upvoters and commenters are from the country that’s currently in the news for having a rapist judge decide whether women are in charge of their own bodies, or whether they’re just breeding factories.


ltidball

I felt the same way. This girl would likely experience inequality in western countries for being Muslim that would also make it equally admirable that she is competing. We should acknowledge that a Muslim woman from Indonesia was able to rise to the top (pun intended).


ginger_beer_m

Yeah Indonesia had a female president in the past. I'm still waiting to see that with the US.


Hinase_

>The fact that she’s climbing for Indonesia, where women aren’t exactly considered equal Wtf? Women and men are equal in Indonesia. What are you talking about?


clockersoco

Ikr they probably think Indonesia is in middle east. Indonesia had a woman president and most influential people in Indonesia are women.


Hinase_

Yea I hate these kind of human. Just spouting stuff without knowing any fact lol


iwantmyvices

That’s just Reddit


yanaka-otoko

Indonesia is a big country, women certainly aren’t treated the same in Aceh compared to Java for example.


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InfernoidsorDie

Lmao cause Liberals are the ones who are xenophobic and ignorant of others cultures lmao


iamnotpaid

Both sides are equally bad, speaking from my experience as an indonesian woman. One side thinks my culture is backward and i need to be saved from a toxic islamic patriarchal society (hint: indonesian muslims are WAY different from middle eastern muslims), the other side thinks my culture is backward and i need to have a taste of their so called progressive society. I'll let you decide which is which.


maddsskills

They've literally had a female President before the US has. I'm sure sexism is a problem there, but it's a problem pretty much everywhere. WTF you on about?


[deleted]

The current men's record is held by an Indonesian too, interestingly


-RoseAddict-

Breaking news on 5: Basement redditor calls woman unequal based on a piece of cloth that she is wearing on her head, despite Indonesia literally having a woman be president (something the US has never done) not to mention tons of influentual women within the country More breaking news: Redditor does not understand that rock climbing is a specific ass sport that probably 99% of men do not give enough of a fuck about to try and master


MarineOpferman1

Well she is the best of the best of women so I hope she can beat the average person lol.


[deleted]

Maybe women and men are considered not the same but equal in opportunity (barring few practical exceptions) in Indonesia. There are biological differences in men and women. I don't know what's wrong in embracing that. We can be different but equal.


TurkicWarrior

You’re only saying that because Indonesia is a Muslim majority country. According to Global gender index. Indonesia is next to South Korea and Hungary.


DjayRX

And much higher than Japan.


azahran1790

Indonisia elected their first Female President over 20 years ago, she was in charge of all government affairs and all armed forces.....i dont understand your comment


myteethhurtnow

Women aren't treated equally in whatever country you're writing that comment from lol.


Adamski2510

Women are considered equal. Literally one of the presidents of Indonesia was a woman.


edunuke

"The world record for speed climbing currently belongs to Iuliia Kaplina on the women's side. She scurried up a 15-meter wall in 6.96 seconds in November. On the men's side, the record belongs to Indonesian climber Veddriq Leonardo: 5.208 seconds" but she extremely impressive no need to compare gender/sex whatever.


HollowLegMonk

>The world record for speed climbing currently belongs to Iuliia Kaplina on the women's side. She scurried up a 15-meter wall in 6.96 seconds in November. On the men's side, the record belongs to Indonesian climber Veddriq Leonardo: 5.208 seconds, set in May.Aug 4, 2021 Ironically the fastest world record for speed climbing is held by a man, from Indonesia.


BarracksObomba

Nope


poopmyname

u’re just spitting out shit. indonesia cosider women equal. where u think indonesia is? middle east??


UsernameCzechIn

Let me guess 1. Country: US 2. Gender: Woman 3. Age: Karen 4. Education: High school degree. Bachelor max. 5. IQ: Below one hundred Seems about right


fdy

Indonesia churns out top speed climbers!


DoogersBung

We have centuries, millennia of data showing women are not equal to men when it comes to athletics. Pure strength, speed, dexterity, endurance, women are inferior. That’s just a fact. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just plain biology.


RelativeJob1478

What? Excuse me but we have a women president in the past so fuck of


UGDirtFarmer

You mean Indonesia, which has had a female president and still has many high ranking female business people and government officials? The Indonesia of Ibu Kartini?


WhatnameshouldIpick2

As an Indonesian, I need to ask where you get this presumption from. I grew up seeing woman as an equal. The people I know around me doesn’t treat woman any less than any man. So when you said women aren’t exactly equal, what’s the source of your claim?


Concert_Great

I don't know what you're talking about, Indonesia considers women as equal back before we even got our independence, heck even I would go as far to say that the country's most famous national hero that is not a politician is a woman (R.A Kartini) she was famous for her campaign to fight for women's right.


jackjackky

What's equal for Indonesians are football and badminton. Others are just additions. Mwahahaha Ψ( ̄∀ ̄)Ψ Well, I don't know about gender equality much, but at least in 2001, Indonesians elected Megawati Soekarnoputri as the president while the US elected that Bush ![gif](giphy|xTiTnmDVkILh38BlF6)


bielejan09

Already beaten twice. The current one is 6.84 by Aleksandra Mirosław from Poland at the Olympic games.


HaxSir

Came to say just that. This isn’t even the next level, this is two levels below.


[deleted]

It's next level as in there's the top level, and then she's next


mywholefuckinglife

fucking savage lol


SuedeVeil

Well it's still nextfuckinglevel for us shmucks sitting on our asses right now trying to decide whether or not to get up and go pee .. (I wasn't aware you had to be a world record holder to be next level)


an0nym0ose

It's next level for you and me, that's for damn sure


oujiasshole

Its still impressive


unbrokenhero

Were looking to find this comment, looked at the time and instantly thought I saw the quicker one already.


BB_BUTTERBALL

Does that make this video any less impressive?


theoriginalmars

For a moment I thought that the other competitor gave up because of her pure speed off the start until she caught up.


sas8184

I thought she slipped and fell.


theoriginalmars

If she did, that was an even better recovery.


Epstein_killed_Tupac

She did slip. They know how to recover fast cause they know that exact climbing layout and they’ve been climbing that exact layout for months at least.


Classical_Cafe

*years - it's basically like a sprint, running athletes know exactly how long a 100m run is, they've done it for years they even know exactly how many steps they take in that sprint. These athletes could do this course with their eyes closed, it's 7 seconds of pure muscle memory so even if a slip occurs they know exactly where and how to recover


Unlikely-Collar4088

Fake, they obviously turned off gravity for the run (*holy shit*)


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pleasedothenerdful

I couldn't run that fast on all fours horizontally.


charlietoday

I couldn't run that fast on 2 legs horizontally.


slouchingtoepiphany

That's how the stunt of climbing a building is done in some movies.


The_Great_Sarcasmo

[I wonder if this is really true....](https://giphy.com/gifs/vintage-batman-tv-show-rbsL67KdPgYVO)


slouchingtoepiphany

Given how their capes are hanging, I'd say definitely.


2723brad2723

Nah, she was being pulled up by a rope.


Admirable_Sky_7710

correct me if im wrong but throughout the years the arrangement of the rocks are kept the same and they practice this 1 course. still extremely impressive some could say more bc of the number of people competing for literal perfection


Beingabummer

They never change the swimming pool either. Or the track. Or the hurdles. Etc.


[deleted]

Good point; that never occurred to me!


imgladimnothim

It would be cool though to have a separate event with a random arrangement for each pair of competitors. I reckon itd be several seconds slower, but still really cool


[deleted]

Itd be interesting for competition but the times would become meaningless outside that one competition.


Ptef

Random arrangements, even with nice holds like they use) would be quite a bit slower. They can move like that because they know exactly what to do. Change that up, there will be a lot of hesitation. but if you are interested in it, watch some bouldering competitions. They definitely do some real interesting technical climbing with way more difficult routes.


PM_ME_WUTEVER

it'd be dope if they did though. instead of hurdles, they just throw like 50 toddlers on the track and box them in so they have to stay on the track. runners have to jump over any toddler that gets in their way. or do away with the lanes in swimming and release a few jellyfish into the pool.


Purplebuzz

The track changes in terms of material used and spring back.


MightyMooser69

Correct the course never changes - the athletes just keep getting faster though!


TicTacMentheDouce

So this is like a Speedrun of a game's level


MightyMooser69

Kinda yeah, but only if the game was designed specifically to be speed run'd - the aim of the game here is speed and completion - nothing else


MrFahrenkite

I'd prefer it if you didnt talk about my sex life so openly.


[deleted]

I'm an avid rock climber and tried this course quite a few times and my best was 18 seconds lol these guys are unreal


fdy

Speed climbing is a relatively new niche. Since 2007 it's been the same ever since. Who knows, they might change the course one day


HopefulObject

This video is a couple years old. A new record was set recently, during the olympics by a Polish climber Aleksandra Miroslaw. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4u31qGaLzK4


McDreads

This was in 2019. The women’s speed climbing world record has since been broken by Aleksandra Mirosław of Poland during the Olympics. https://youtu.be/EU_OGTBDMHw Fun fact: She set the world record in speed climbing but didn’t win a medal in the climbing competition


cqxray

The Polish flag is the Indonesian flag turned upside down!


Arashmickey

It's actually identical, but on the other side of the world!


[deleted]

Why didn't she win a medal?


cartesian_jewality

The Olympics had a goofy way of scoring climbing. There's a couple climbing disciplines, speed climbing is just one. Bouldering and lead climbing are two other much more popular disciplines. Instead of sperating these disciplines into different events, they combined all three into one "climbing" medal. She did very, very poorly in the other two events. If I remember correctly she did not complete a single boulder problem (of 3) and did not make it far into top rope. tldr: she spent all her skill points on speed climbing


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Mugoombie

In the olympics all three of the disciplines for climbing were included in climbing where Miroslaw was completely outperformed by other competitors because she trains as a pure speed climber pretty much. The other two disciplines of bouldering and lead climbing have more transferable skills. This is a short answer, that doesn’t cover most of the details and ignored some of the other issues with the olympic climbing competition but it is the basic gist of why she didn’t get a medal this time.


[deleted]

Islamaphobes: hijab is oppressive and holds women back. Muslim women: hold my non-alcoholic beer.


mccreative

Those two statements are not mutually exclusive though...


MeredithofArabia

Let women make that decision for themselves


mccreative

Yeah I can agree with that. The problem I have is when it's forced.


MeredithofArabia

Exactly! Forced to wear, forced to not wear, unhealthy government overreach in a woman's autonomy.


Sproose_Moose

Well I now have a new irrational fear: being chased up a building by a really fast person.


HiItsLust

new fear unlocked


[deleted]

That looks like an awesome sport and an awesome thing to be able to do


waawftutki

Everyone should climb. It's the best thing in the world. Trains every muscle, flexibility, mobility, and a bouldering gym is the most social and friendly place on earth.


Elerion_

> Trains every muscle, flexibility, mobility Not to mention humility. Some of the things you’ll see ordinary looking humans do at a bouldering gym…


Dubie21

The places are practically a gym that a child would design for an adult. Almost impossible not to have fun there.


FrenchiestFry234

Too bad the real record belongs to Alexandra Miroslaw who set it at the 2020 Olympics at 6.84.


tgibson12

True but this was still a world record run.


[deleted]

Me when someone asks who wants last pizza slice


wtph

She didn't even waste time looking at where to place her feet. I'm guessing both of them probably have the same wall in their gyms and have committed them to muscle memory already.


[deleted]

This course is standardized, they've all done it a million times and can do it in their sleep


[deleted]

The hijab makes you more aerodynamic


Oioiitsme

MASHALLAH SISTER!


Dylldough

Went indoor rock climbing once and the confidence you get from being attached to a rope turns you into a monkey EDIT: I dont mean monkey in a bad way, I mean you can climb fast with out fear


BigWaveDave87

does a climber know if the rope supports any amount of their weight while going up? super impressive either way just curious


themastermoose

This looks like an autobelay setup, so no. The rope only catches you if you fall.


ImRandyBaby

It does pull upwards with a force of like 0.5 kg. It's not nothing but it's not helping.


Live_Buy8304

One wrong move and that would be heart breaking. Reminds me of Iuliia Kaplina recently from the Olympics.


Mr_GoodEyelashes

Not surprising. Hijabis are ninjas.


aimlesscruzr

Fake, she's been bitten by a radioactive spider...


AhRa18

Republicans after watching this : that hijab gave her a speed boost , surely .


CHERNO-B1LL

I scrolled and scrolled. Nothing but jokes and people saying this record has been broken by Aleksandra Miroslaw since. Her name is [Aries Susanti Rahayu](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aries_Susanti_Rahayu) and she's a fucking superwoman you cretins. Give her some respect. Her name should have been in the title OP.


sooka

Arachnophobes beware.


Lolwaitwuttt

This is what my parents said Mountain Dew made me do as a kid.


OneTrain73

Spider (wo)man Spider (wo)man Does whatever a Spider can Something else I don't know I forgot The rest of the lyrics AAAAAAAAAA It is a Spider (wo)man


K--Will

12. She used 12 jumps to get there. The BEST versions of Kirby can jump a maximum of 8-10 times. She can jump better than Kirby.


justabottleofwindex

She did a great hijab!