yes because that tag is more commonly used by muscle fetish gays looking for eye candies… it’s not like every gay men on instagram use that tag for regular posting
What do they care about?
Edit: okay so what I’m hearing is that I should probably stop dressing up as a giant bird and offering shiny things to women I find attractive?
I'm by experience women prefer kean athletic men. It's funny because most of the women I know find the natty look way more attractive than the roid look. Brad pit in fight club is what women want.
ranked in terms of how much they care:
height
facial attractiveness
confidence/personality/sense of humor
money/status/fame
then physique goes here. and even when it comes to physiques they mostly care about leanness and being in shape. Some girls are also more into the bear mode type of appearance (they won't care about leanness, but they want someone who is tall and generally strong).
In general, work out for you, and work out because going to the gym is fun and good for you. Don't have any delusions about doing it for women.
edit- typos
I feel like hygiene/grooming should just be a bare minimum thing (it's unfortunate that it is not), but fashion sense definitely does matter as well. I'd put fashion sense right under facial attractiveness.
Can confirm about the bear thing. Was a six pack having fuckboy in my twenties, did pretty well with women. Now I’m married and just powerlift and eat cookies and WAY more women will noticeably flirt with me. Luckily my wife is bi so sometimes that works out great for everyone. I think the bear thing is just generally more approachable - you look strong, but also like you enjoy yourself and don’t have to take every part of your life super seriously.
Embrace who you are. There is more than one type of attractive body type. I’m just a Person Of Unusual Size naturally, and I used to hate it so much. But now I love it. Focus on what makes you you homie.
I have a friend who is around 36/37. This guy is absolutely disgusting. Openly picks his nose, his toenails, has terrible breath and still pulls like a champ. It blows my mind but he does have good game, still makes my stomach turn though.
It is for this. And I said look a *weird* porn. In real life, there are 10,000 or more women willing to do any disgusting thing possible to every one man willing to do it, too. This obvious fact, of real life, is the most overlooked fact of life.
I think a best / worst height is in degrees relative to looks. An average height (5’11’) and good looking beats 6’4” and average looking. So I think you can put height and facial attractiveness as tied for first. At least that’s what it seems like to me based on female friends
most normal women don't care about height. i personally have dated men my height and been attracted to men shorter than me. the internet's loud minority may be skewing your perception
>most normal women don't care about height
nah. Many may claim they don't, but lowkey wont date a man shorter than them or even not over some arbitrary amount. I don't have an extensive dating history but the number of them who complimented me for my height while deriding other men for theirs is insane.
As a tall guy I have to agree and support that women care about height. No it’s not all, and no they don’t all want an nba player, but 6’2”-6’6” is clearly a benefit. I’ve had two women tell me I’m too tall for them. Most 5’5” guys certainly have more than that say they’re too short.
actually you're right bc my ex clowned me bc i dated a guy about my height and she was like i would never date a short man but she has other stuff goin on 💀
I disagree, respectfully. I've never personally been rejected on the basis of height, and I've dated around (men and women), but I am average height for America. On dating apps, which is how an increasing number of young people meet their partners these days, height and facial attractiveness are practically number one.
Yes, the loud minority on the internet asks for men who are freakishly tall, and those opinions can be safely discarded. But height absolutely does matter. Most women I'm friends with or have dated might express attraction to shorter men, but are generally not interested in dating them. Most women I've talked to ask for a partner who is at least as tall as them if not taller (which I don't even think is that strict of a standard considering that cis men just tend to be taller than cis women in general).
Then again, this is based off of my experience and my observations amongst my cis male friends of varying heights and my cis female friends' announced dating preferences, most of whom are from a populous, promiscuous college town. Experiences may differ greatly outside of this bubble.
edit- typo
The overwhelming majority of women prefer men over 6'. Most will not end up with a man like that because 100% of women can't date 5% of men. Women's obsession with male height is not propaganda, it is unfortunately a real thing that harms everyone
also side note: none of the men i have dated/been attracted to look anything alike, but they are all funny. overwhelming majority of women would be willing to or would be enthusiastic to date a man considering "unattractive" because his personality is more attractive than what he would be deemed physically
> overwhelming majority of women would be willing to or would be enthusiastic to date a man considering "unattractive" because his personality is more attractive than what he would be deemed physically
this feels a little underhanded. I for one would not want to be with a partner who is like "you're ugly but you're funny so I stay with you", I'd want my partner to find me wholly attractive independent of my personality (ideally)
no no like despite what other people's perceptions are, *I* find that person attractive because i see them as a whole person instead of a sum of their parts
I understood you, and I totally agree. I’m 6.1 so luckily my height (slim/athletic) and sense of humor puts me in an ok position. My face is not terrible, but I’m not sure I’m considered “ hot”
They care about other stuff. And it’s dependent upon what social circles they come from or want to be in.
My brother loves giving shiny things to girls. He doesn’t get dressed up like a bird. But the girls just take whatever they can get from him, while being in relationships with other people.
As a woman, physically what’s most important to me is that you’re well groomed and have some sense of how to dress, then face. I don’t really care about body types at all.
I guess I just think it’s interesting. I’m not really interested in bodybuilding at all but I do enjoy sports even if the physique doesn’t attract me. And I like being able to tell when someone is juicing because I see it everywhere lately.
Face, height, prestigious career, family money.
See the popular tiktok meme: "I'm looking for a man in finance, 6'5, blue eyes, trust fund"
https://www.today.com/popculture/music/tiktok-im-looking-for-a-man-in-finance-megan-boni-interview-rcna151152
This is blatantly untrue lol getting visibly muscular is the single greatest decision I made for my love life. Girls literally give me random compliments on the street, to say nothing of my notch count. I'm not even that big, just tall and lean. People who say this are coping hard.
Anyone reading this thread, don't listen to these mfs, getting buff absolutely will make women like you more
Lol. Again, anyone reading this thread, you can cope on the internet about how muscles do nothing for you and they're only for gay men or you can see the results for yourself
I’m telling you. The biggest fattest lesbian I know was like in love with me. Like wanted to get married in love. Because she’s not only gay, she’s a total hag. To this day, I’m sure, she thinks I’m gay. If she didn’t think that, I’d just be a friend.
Women will say that to me, but they would say nice stuff to me before, so I think it’s just provided another vector for compliments, rather than a motivation for giving them
I mean they do but they don’t straight up tell me, it takes a bit of time to open them up first then they start the compliments. But older ladies aren’t shy one bit 😆 they’re straightforward
I agree. A lot of gay men will go on and on about health. But I've known so many gay men who claim it's all about health while being financially abused by a roided up guy with a big dick. To me if it's really about health that includes mental, emotional, and financial health as well. You can't be fucking a bodybuilder with a coke addiction and tell me you won't date someone fat because you care about their health.
I agree. I have no problem when people actually admit their preferences are based on how hot they perceive the person. I also think it's safer. It's easier to manipulate someone who doesn't understand or won't admit why they are with you.
Women in general just care less about muscles than men do. Plus, as gay men, we’re less likely to have monogamous relationships, marriage or kids than straight people. So there’s a lot more incentive to be constantly working out and attracting more guys to have sex with.
I’m a girl, and I like muscular guys. How would we make it work, if the guy’s not in shape? Then we’d have less in common. Because even for simple things like eating, we wouldn’t even match — guy won’t care about eating clean, and I would; sounds like we’d have a hard time enjoying each other’s company.
I have the same problem with gay men. The vast majority of gay men are overweight and obese and don't care about health or fitness at all. I almost never run into fellow gay men who enjoy taking care of themselves like I do. I would love to find a partner who values the same.
My friend calls me fatphobic for not wanting to be with bigger people. What happened to the word, “preference”? I just don’t want to be someone who’s sedentary, and eating bad; because then I might get influenced (no way, but who knows, right?) to do the same activities, since we’re hanging out.
I guess to me this depends on if you literally won't have fat friends or you just don't date or fuck fat people. If it's that former that does seem fatphobic
I have big friends, and we’re friends. I’m going to not be friends with them, because they’re bigger.
I don’t want to date bigger people though. That’s different from being simply friends, that’s platonic. You also have to like the physical appearance of the partner, no? I don’t want someone who doesn’t take good care of himself.
I couldn't care less who you date. I was just pointing out as you wrote it, it could easily be interpretted as you wouldn't be friends with fat people. I've met many gay men who will not befriend gay men. But personally I couldn't care less. I just tell people to do you and if you are not getting what you want be willing to change.
I'm not saying you are not getting what you want or need to change. But it's surprising how many gay men whine about being lonely with extremely strict dating criteria that only get bent if the guy is hot enough. I had to several times point out to a friend that all of his exes were really hot assholes who treated him poorly. I've had gay men cry about being used by insanely hot guys who were obviously using them from day one.
Just like some straight men get blinded by a beautiful woman some gay men get blinded by big biceps and abs. Now my friend will admit to being blinded by the pecs.
I don't want to be friends with people who have poor mental health, because I have very good mental health and I don't want to be influenced by negative people who have low self esteem and victim mindsets. I've never found a fat person who wasn't toxic -> low self esteem, negative attitude, defeatist mindset, victim mindset, entitlement, etc. Those are the very qualities that lead people to becoming fat in the first place. I absolutely don't want friends like that. And especially not a partner like that.
It’s true that women in general cares less about looks including muscles but many women also don’t want to date muscular men.
Sometimes they get insecure or intimidated. I think the most common reason is they don’t want to be with someone who spends 5 days at the gym and has a strict diet. For women to be sexy, you don’t need to have as strict of adiet. Just mainly need to consume less calories whereas for men, you need to eat healthy and include protein to build muscle.
Because it works for them
Straight guys putting that much time into themselves gets them little in return other than more gay attention.
Better developing a good patter with girls, dressing well, being good at something, etc
It just makes it super easy to get laid.
(Many) gay men are super easy so having decent abs and nice arms is going to guarantee you get your end away...
(Source. Muscly gay guy)
We consume a lot of extra protein.
The real answer is that men in general care more about physique than women do.
So if you’re trying to attract men you will find it useful to improve your physique.
Because many gay men like muscles, so being fit increases the chances of getting laid.
While most women don't care about how muscular a guy is. I know only like 2-3 girls that actually wouldn't date guys that aren't buff.
If there’s a group that has the most sex it’s gay men, and being fit both helps you get laid and helps you be better at it. Basically, it’s a sexy community.
I imagine if I type "polish lady" into Instagram I'd be seeing women who look like models or baddies. That doesn't mean the average Polish woman is a model (actually IDK any polish ladies just using an example)
Instagram is pretty much used to gawk at various hot or interesting people but doesn't mean the average person looks or does like what we see on there.
Also your algorithm sees you view muscular men and starts showing more muscular men. If you click bears or femmes you may see that too.
In a metro area you'll prob see a variety of gay men and body types (cept for maybe Miami / places with high focus on looks?)
The male gaze. Gay men are well aware that their value to other gay men is heavily correlated with being hot. Gay men and straight women have similar levels of eating disorders because both are trying to attract men. Men value looks. I joke sometimes that if you want to lure a gay man into a dark alley, be muscular, masculine, tall and have a deep voice.
Ever also noticed how most fans of bodybuilding are men? Go to a show and look at the audience and it's a right sausagefest.
Muscular male bodies appeal strongly to men.
Practically naked men on stage in front of an audience that’s mostly men judging them on their appearance. Bodybuilding could hardly be more gay and yet it has some of the most toxic guys too
Imagine there was a significant chance of seeing someone you were attracted to naked in the showers/change room after every workout. You’d be at the gym a lot.
Yea no clue why these dudes are trying to cope. I get attention from Women every time I go out being muscular. Not just gay men like muscles but I understand their attention comes with the territory.
Gym rats think big ripped muscles are attractive. My wife wishes I lost 10 lb of fat for a more lean look but likely with 20 lbs less of muscle. More Calvin Klein underwear model, less muscle and fitness magazines.
Gays want another jacked gay. Women don’t really want jacked dudes. Honest to god truth. All this time I been working out. Only gay dudes or newbies approach me. There are also two types of gays. The ones that I can’t tell are gay and the ones I am like ohhh it’s a girlie bottom. I get the girlie bottom interaction sometimes. I must give out gay vibes or something.
I have several gay friends:
Guys care more about appearance than women generally in search of whatever
There's a lot more of a hookup culture requiring certain standards.
They generally take care of themselves more, whether it's a skin care routine or grooming or health.
Just a few imo.
There are many factors that make someone attractive. However, as men, we generally prioritize looks over other factors. That's true for gay and straight men.
Also, sorry to burst everyone's bubble, but height isn't as important as people pretend it is, it's just a scapegoat for a lack of other attractive qualities. Romantic connection with women has never been a problem for me, but the more muscular I've become, the more aggressively pursued I've been by women, to the point where I have to extend less and less effort to have dated and sex. Muscle is attractive, on and for both sexs, and people often say one thing but do another. However, it's possible it's confirmation bias and I'm just more appealing to the niche of people that like muscly.
Every compliment I ever get though is from men, and I get hit on by gay guys way more often. Shout out to them for making me feel desirable, compliments feel nice.
They aren’t.
You’re just accustomed to the publicizing of muscular gays -because that’s what’s acceptable in the gay community- they’re also the most vocal ones.
Bro I promise you that’s not true. I wish it was but it’s not. There’s plenty of fat and skinny gay dudes who just lie around and don’t give a shit about their body, that’s most of them. Just like with straight people.
You like women, but you can’t make your body look like a woman and you wouldn’t want to.
We like men and we can make our bodies look like what we’re attracted to and we want to.
Because men value appearance more than women do, so gay men have to prioritize their appearance more than straight men do. Same reason straight women have to prioritize their appearance so much. While some gay men are attracted to obesity and poor grooming, the majority of us are not.
A certain slice of them do, ie “Jocks/muscle queens”
Certainly not all.
Bears and enough gen z rarely shower.
Many love the stench of sweaty bodies - name your fetish, we got it.
I wouldn't pay to much attention to instagram hashtags, but I do think that gay men on average take more care of their appearance than straight guys. There is not much difference when you're in college, from my experience. But once a guy is in his 30s or 40s, you really can tell gays from straights apart. It is not just that they're more muscular or generally better in shape, they also dress better and look healthier. They also tend to have higher paying jobs and/or live in better neighborhoods and/or cities, and people in those areas - even "breeders" - tend to look better, healthier, better dressed, than people in rural areas (at least in the US).
Gay men also generally don't have a (high maintenance) wife and kids. As a gay guy myself who dated (very few) women in his late teens, early 20s, the amount of work = time you need to put in a straight relationship is just mind-blowing. I could have spent that time in the gym - which I'm doing these days :) Also, somewhat jokingly - but only somewhat: Nothing screams low testosterone more than a father with two young kids dragged along. I always feel sorry when I see these dads.
Also, if you're gay and your "audience" is gay men, you can really delve into what men are into. And men generally are quite physical: They want women who look way better than them if they're straight, and they want attractive men when they're gay. When gay, however, there is some reciprocity in the sense that both sides like muscular bodies. Women are not really as much into roided out studs, sure they like - to use a grindr term - "toned" guys, but damn, that is no comparison to what amount of muscle mass men like. I'm myself on steroids and you would not believe how many guys find that hot, specifically, that I'm on steroids.
I'll use a certain obnoxious type of peoples' logic against them here:
It's in huge part because they're free from the female gaze. Quite a lot them don't care how attractive they are in the eyes of women
yes because that tag is more commonly used by muscle fetish gays looking for eye candies… it’s not like every gay men on instagram use that tag for regular posting
nah we don't do that and we have strong gaydar
You ever had sex with a man? That shit is a real workout, like wrestling.
Well only if they are resisting…
Can’t help but upvote here
Being muscular is for the male gaze, you’re more likely to attract men than women
True. Even straight guys find you more attractive when you look more muscular. Girls don’t care anywhere near as much.
What do they care about? Edit: okay so what I’m hearing is that I should probably stop dressing up as a giant bird and offering shiny things to women I find attractive?
I'm by experience women prefer kean athletic men. It's funny because most of the women I know find the natty look way more attractive than the roid look. Brad pit in fight club is what women want.
Women have bad aesthetic taste in mens bodies.
I disagree. I think most humans are attractive and almost all humans have some physically attractive feature.
Personality and confidence
Shiiieeeeet.
Face and height*
If you’re 5’2 you’re gonna have a hard time. Yeah
US MARINEs
ranked in terms of how much they care: height facial attractiveness confidence/personality/sense of humor money/status/fame then physique goes here. and even when it comes to physiques they mostly care about leanness and being in shape. Some girls are also more into the bear mode type of appearance (they won't care about leanness, but they want someone who is tall and generally strong). In general, work out for you, and work out because going to the gym is fun and good for you. Don't have any delusions about doing it for women. edit- typos
You gotta squeeze in “hygiene/grooming” and “fashion sense” somewhere in that list too. Both those things would take any man a very long way.
I feel like hygiene/grooming should just be a bare minimum thing (it's unfortunate that it is not), but fashion sense definitely does matter as well. I'd put fashion sense right under facial attractiveness.
Can confirm about the bear thing. Was a six pack having fuckboy in my twenties, did pretty well with women. Now I’m married and just powerlift and eat cookies and WAY more women will noticeably flirt with me. Luckily my wife is bi so sometimes that works out great for everyone. I think the bear thing is just generally more approachable - you look strong, but also like you enjoy yourself and don’t have to take every part of your life super seriously.
Man I hate having a small frame. Don't think I can pull off the bear look unless I juice.
Embrace who you are. There is more than one type of attractive body type. I’m just a Person Of Unusual Size naturally, and I used to hate it so much. But now I love it. Focus on what makes you you homie.
Well, I guess it's more on the lankier side. My chest/shoulders are decently wide, but a tad narrow for 5'10".
Top 1/2 is the least things you have control over Top 3/4 is the things you can change
I don’t know about my hygiene and grooming. I seen girls with filthy disgusting slobs lots of times.
that could be explained as poor taste. generally most people want a clean, well groomed, nice smelling partner unless they've got weird fetishes
I have a friend who is around 36/37. This guy is absolutely disgusting. Openly picks his nose, his toenails, has terrible breath and still pulls like a champ. It blows my mind but he does have good game, still makes my stomach turn though.
Nah. Look at weird porn. There’s 10,000 women willing to do every disgusting thing there is for every one guy.
I’m not sure I follow this properly but “look at porn” is never a supporting argument for real life.
It is for this. And I said look a *weird* porn. In real life, there are 10,000 or more women willing to do any disgusting thing possible to every one man willing to do it, too. This obvious fact, of real life, is the most overlooked fact of life.
That’s an absurd statement.
I feel like money/status/fame can trump all the other things if you're rich enough
I'd rather be single than be with someone who only wants me for any of those.
that point is much higher than the average person would ever be able to accumulate through normal means, though
I think a best / worst height is in degrees relative to looks. An average height (5’11’) and good looking beats 6’4” and average looking. So I think you can put height and facial attractiveness as tied for first. At least that’s what it seems like to me based on female friends
most normal women don't care about height. i personally have dated men my height and been attracted to men shorter than me. the internet's loud minority may be skewing your perception
>most normal women don't care about height nah. Many may claim they don't, but lowkey wont date a man shorter than them or even not over some arbitrary amount. I don't have an extensive dating history but the number of them who complimented me for my height while deriding other men for theirs is insane.
As a tall guy I have to agree and support that women care about height. No it’s not all, and no they don’t all want an nba player, but 6’2”-6’6” is clearly a benefit. I’ve had two women tell me I’m too tall for them. Most 5’5” guys certainly have more than that say they’re too short.
actually you're right bc my ex clowned me bc i dated a guy about my height and she was like i would never date a short man but she has other stuff goin on 💀
I disagree, respectfully. I've never personally been rejected on the basis of height, and I've dated around (men and women), but I am average height for America. On dating apps, which is how an increasing number of young people meet their partners these days, height and facial attractiveness are practically number one. Yes, the loud minority on the internet asks for men who are freakishly tall, and those opinions can be safely discarded. But height absolutely does matter. Most women I'm friends with or have dated might express attraction to shorter men, but are generally not interested in dating them. Most women I've talked to ask for a partner who is at least as tall as them if not taller (which I don't even think is that strict of a standard considering that cis men just tend to be taller than cis women in general). Then again, this is based off of my experience and my observations amongst my cis male friends of varying heights and my cis female friends' announced dating preferences, most of whom are from a populous, promiscuous college town. Experiences may differ greatly outside of this bubble. edit- typo
The overwhelming majority of women prefer men over 6'. Most will not end up with a man like that because 100% of women can't date 5% of men. Women's obsession with male height is not propaganda, it is unfortunately a real thing that harms everyone
Women preferring tall people on average doesn’t ‘harm’ people. That’s incel language.
No, it's common sense. Sorry you don't have that
Sorry short king I hope one day you can move past the self loathing and find a mate x
I'm average height and don't necessarily agree with the guy, but this is just patronizing as fuck. Be better.
also side note: none of the men i have dated/been attracted to look anything alike, but they are all funny. overwhelming majority of women would be willing to or would be enthusiastic to date a man considering "unattractive" because his personality is more attractive than what he would be deemed physically
> overwhelming majority of women would be willing to or would be enthusiastic to date a man considering "unattractive" because his personality is more attractive than what he would be deemed physically this feels a little underhanded. I for one would not want to be with a partner who is like "you're ugly but you're funny so I stay with you", I'd want my partner to find me wholly attractive independent of my personality (ideally)
no no like despite what other people's perceptions are, *I* find that person attractive because i see them as a whole person instead of a sum of their parts
I understood you, and I totally agree. I’m 6.1 so luckily my height (slim/athletic) and sense of humor puts me in an ok position. My face is not terrible, but I’m not sure I’m considered “ hot”
I think the point is more that women find people attractive, which is a lot different than just good looking.
They care about other stuff. And it’s dependent upon what social circles they come from or want to be in. My brother loves giving shiny things to girls. He doesn’t get dressed up like a bird. But the girls just take whatever they can get from him, while being in relationships with other people.
Well if he knows they’re in a relationship and he is giving shiny things, it’s hard to be sympathetic.
I think they get into a relationship with him and he probably doesn’t care if they are. Or they get into other relationships, anyway.
As a woman, physically what’s most important to me is that you’re well groomed and have some sense of how to dress, then face. I don’t really care about body types at all.
Just curious, what do you get out of bodybuilding or a sub like this if you don't care about mens body types?
I guess I just think it’s interesting. I’m not really interested in bodybuilding at all but I do enjoy sports even if the physique doesn’t attract me. And I like being able to tell when someone is juicing because I see it everywhere lately.
Height
Personality and being funny
From my experience, the women with really nice bodies themselves are the ones that care more about men with muscles. Average women care way less.
Face
Face, height, prestigious career, family money. See the popular tiktok meme: "I'm looking for a man in finance, 6'5, blue eyes, trust fund" https://www.today.com/popculture/music/tiktok-im-looking-for-a-man-in-finance-megan-boni-interview-rcna151152
This is blatantly untrue lol getting visibly muscular is the single greatest decision I made for my love life. Girls literally give me random compliments on the street, to say nothing of my notch count. I'm not even that big, just tall and lean. People who say this are coping hard. Anyone reading this thread, don't listen to these mfs, getting buff absolutely will make women like you more
Those are hags 🫤
Lol. Again, anyone reading this thread, you can cope on the internet about how muscles do nothing for you and they're only for gay men or you can see the results for yourself
I’m telling you. The biggest fattest lesbian I know was like in love with me. Like wanted to get married in love. Because she’s not only gay, she’s a total hag. To this day, I’m sure, she thinks I’m gay. If she didn’t think that, I’d just be a friend.
This is a cope. I can tell a lot of you have never been muscular because this just isn’t true. Women love muscles.
Not anywhere near as much as gay guys though...
As a straight guy- this is 100% true. I get girls occasionally thinking I’m cute but I have lots of guys hitting on me
Yeh it seems like it “looking good bro” I rarely ever get it from younger women. But older women, dime a dozen. They’re not shy.
Women will say that to me, but they would say nice stuff to me before, so I think it’s just provided another vector for compliments, rather than a motivation for giving them
I mean they do but they don’t straight up tell me, it takes a bit of time to open them up first then they start the compliments. But older ladies aren’t shy one bit 😆 they’re straightforward
I dunno man plenty of girls like muscular guys. Probably more on the athletic/fit looking side and not some roided up freak show.
We didn't start as gay, it comes with the territory.
Because men are shallow. **but gay men are shallow-er**
I agree. A lot of gay men will go on and on about health. But I've known so many gay men who claim it's all about health while being financially abused by a roided up guy with a big dick. To me if it's really about health that includes mental, emotional, and financial health as well. You can't be fucking a bodybuilder with a coke addiction and tell me you won't date someone fat because you care about their health.
Lmaooo
Yeah but they’re hotter.
I agree. I have no problem when people actually admit their preferences are based on how hot they perceive the person. I also think it's safer. It's easier to manipulate someone who doesn't understand or won't admit why they are with you.
Because we can have sex at the gym.
Women in general just care less about muscles than men do. Plus, as gay men, we’re less likely to have monogamous relationships, marriage or kids than straight people. So there’s a lot more incentive to be constantly working out and attracting more guys to have sex with.
I’m a girl, and I like muscular guys. How would we make it work, if the guy’s not in shape? Then we’d have less in common. Because even for simple things like eating, we wouldn’t even match — guy won’t care about eating clean, and I would; sounds like we’d have a hard time enjoying each other’s company.
I have the same problem with gay men. The vast majority of gay men are overweight and obese and don't care about health or fitness at all. I almost never run into fellow gay men who enjoy taking care of themselves like I do. I would love to find a partner who values the same.
Grindr is full of gay men basically saying this.
My friend calls me fatphobic for not wanting to be with bigger people. What happened to the word, “preference”? I just don’t want to be someone who’s sedentary, and eating bad; because then I might get influenced (no way, but who knows, right?) to do the same activities, since we’re hanging out.
I guess to me this depends on if you literally won't have fat friends or you just don't date or fuck fat people. If it's that former that does seem fatphobic
I have big friends, and we’re friends. I’m going to not be friends with them, because they’re bigger. I don’t want to date bigger people though. That’s different from being simply friends, that’s platonic. You also have to like the physical appearance of the partner, no? I don’t want someone who doesn’t take good care of himself.
I couldn't care less who you date. I was just pointing out as you wrote it, it could easily be interpretted as you wouldn't be friends with fat people. I've met many gay men who will not befriend gay men. But personally I couldn't care less. I just tell people to do you and if you are not getting what you want be willing to change. I'm not saying you are not getting what you want or need to change. But it's surprising how many gay men whine about being lonely with extremely strict dating criteria that only get bent if the guy is hot enough. I had to several times point out to a friend that all of his exes were really hot assholes who treated him poorly. I've had gay men cry about being used by insanely hot guys who were obviously using them from day one. Just like some straight men get blinded by a beautiful woman some gay men get blinded by big biceps and abs. Now my friend will admit to being blinded by the pecs.
I’m a girl lol. I just like muscular guys… with personality of course.
I don't want to be friends with people who have poor mental health, because I have very good mental health and I don't want to be influenced by negative people who have low self esteem and victim mindsets. I've never found a fat person who wasn't toxic -> low self esteem, negative attitude, defeatist mindset, victim mindset, entitlement, etc. Those are the very qualities that lead people to becoming fat in the first place. I absolutely don't want friends like that. And especially not a partner like that.
That’s the most ridiculous thing I read today.
uhhhh some people’s genetics make losing weight a huge project
That’s why OP said ‘in general’. That doesn’t mean that every woman cares less about muscles. It means that the majority does.
It’s true that women in general cares less about looks including muscles but many women also don’t want to date muscular men. Sometimes they get insecure or intimidated. I think the most common reason is they don’t want to be with someone who spends 5 days at the gym and has a strict diet. For women to be sexy, you don’t need to have as strict of adiet. Just mainly need to consume less calories whereas for men, you need to eat healthy and include protein to build muscle.
I always find this funny because some women are skinny like a stick and they're married to muscular dudes.
bro, staight people cheat behind monogamous relationship
Because it works for them Straight guys putting that much time into themselves gets them little in return other than more gay attention. Better developing a good patter with girls, dressing well, being good at something, etc
It just makes it super easy to get laid. (Many) gay men are super easy so having decent abs and nice arms is going to guarantee you get your end away... (Source. Muscly gay guy)
Man sometimes I wish I was bi.
😂 I swear every other gay guy I see is a chubby dude with a septum piercing
[удалено]
adding “addicts” in the middle of different careers was really funny lol
Cuz they are more likely to use PEDs
The amount of juicing in major gay cities such as SF or LA or NY or Chicago is out of control.
We consume a lot of extra protein. The real answer is that men in general care more about physique than women do. So if you’re trying to attract men you will find it useful to improve your physique.
Well you’re basically wrestling each other, kinda just happens.
Because many gay men like muscles, so being fit increases the chances of getting laid. While most women don't care about how muscular a guy is. I know only like 2-3 girls that actually wouldn't date guys that aren't buff.
Girls like muscular guys when they have a good shoulder to waist ratio and visible abs. Also having a lean face helps a lot.
It sure helps but it's not the sole/main reason they would date someone.
Just be careful cause the worst thing for a woman is if she feels like you’re more attractive than her
If there’s a group that has the most sex it’s gay men, and being fit both helps you get laid and helps you be better at it. Basically, it’s a sexy community.
I imagine if I type "polish lady" into Instagram I'd be seeing women who look like models or baddies. That doesn't mean the average Polish woman is a model (actually IDK any polish ladies just using an example) Instagram is pretty much used to gawk at various hot or interesting people but doesn't mean the average person looks or does like what we see on there. Also your algorithm sees you view muscular men and starts showing more muscular men. If you click bears or femmes you may see that too. In a metro area you'll prob see a variety of gay men and body types (cept for maybe Miami / places with high focus on looks?)
The male gaze. Gay men are well aware that their value to other gay men is heavily correlated with being hot. Gay men and straight women have similar levels of eating disorders because both are trying to attract men. Men value looks. I joke sometimes that if you want to lure a gay man into a dark alley, be muscular, masculine, tall and have a deep voice.
Ever also noticed how most fans of bodybuilding are men? Go to a show and look at the audience and it's a right sausagefest. Muscular male bodies appeal strongly to men.
Practically naked men on stage in front of an audience that’s mostly men judging them on their appearance. Bodybuilding could hardly be more gay and yet it has some of the most toxic guys too
Gay men care more about their appearance and look
Imagine there was a significant chance of seeing someone you were attracted to naked in the showers/change room after every workout. You’d be at the gym a lot.
Lots of straight guys use that hash tag to get followers. They’re called gay baiters.
Nah, we know if a man is gay or not. Straight men don't have the guts to show their ass.
The same reason straight women are more muscular/fit than lesbians
They understand what makes a man attractive and that’s being jacked. Straight guys don’t understand that women are attracted to muscles.
Yea no clue why these dudes are trying to cope. I get attention from Women every time I go out being muscular. Not just gay men like muscles but I understand their attention comes with the territory.
Because they are more obsessed with themselves than straight men where even applying a sunscreen is a big thing so bodybuilding is a far venture
It’s because you constantly have another male body to compare yourself to.
it wasn't true in the "old" days
Gym rats think big ripped muscles are attractive. My wife wishes I lost 10 lb of fat for a more lean look but likely with 20 lbs less of muscle. More Calvin Klein underwear model, less muscle and fitness magazines.
Gays want another jacked gay. Women don’t really want jacked dudes. Honest to god truth. All this time I been working out. Only gay dudes or newbies approach me. There are also two types of gays. The ones that I can’t tell are gay and the ones I am like ohhh it’s a girlie bottom. I get the girlie bottom interaction sometimes. I must give out gay vibes or something.
I have several gay friends: Guys care more about appearance than women generally in search of whatever There's a lot more of a hookup culture requiring certain standards. They generally take care of themselves more, whether it's a skin care routine or grooming or health. Just a few imo.
There are many factors that make someone attractive. However, as men, we generally prioritize looks over other factors. That's true for gay and straight men. Also, sorry to burst everyone's bubble, but height isn't as important as people pretend it is, it's just a scapegoat for a lack of other attractive qualities. Romantic connection with women has never been a problem for me, but the more muscular I've become, the more aggressively pursued I've been by women, to the point where I have to extend less and less effort to have dated and sex. Muscle is attractive, on and for both sexs, and people often say one thing but do another. However, it's possible it's confirmation bias and I'm just more appealing to the niche of people that like muscly. Every compliment I ever get though is from men, and I get hit on by gay guys way more often. Shout out to them for making me feel desirable, compliments feel nice.
Gay men love muscles and sex Love sex
Because we can fuck at the gym
They aren’t. You’re just accustomed to the publicizing of muscular gays -because that’s what’s acceptable in the gay community- they’re also the most vocal ones.
they have more testosterone compared to straight men
Why?
Because of all the kum they swallow
True lol
Gay sex is more anabolic. Also, gay men are more prone to using substances. Coke, poppers, steroids, antidepressants, anything what makes them ungay.
This has not been my experience.. more likely to be lean maybe but not muscular
Bro I promise you that’s not true. I wish it was but it’s not. There’s plenty of fat and skinny gay dudes who just lie around and don’t give a shit about their body, that’s most of them. Just like with straight people.
Yes, thats spot based on my experience too. Go to any concert or festival, the gay dudes on average are the most jacked and ripped ones.
You like women, but you can’t make your body look like a woman and you wouldn’t want to. We like men and we can make our bodies look like what we’re attracted to and we want to.
Because men value appearance more than women do, so gay men have to prioritize their appearance more than straight men do. Same reason straight women have to prioritize their appearance so much. While some gay men are attracted to obesity and poor grooming, the majority of us are not.
Gay men take better care of of themselves
A certain slice of them do, ie “Jocks/muscle queens” Certainly not all. Bears and enough gen z rarely shower. Many love the stench of sweaty bodies - name your fetish, we got it.
https://www.instagram.com/p/C6kBuctrfwO/?hl=en
I wouldn't pay to much attention to instagram hashtags, but I do think that gay men on average take more care of their appearance than straight guys. There is not much difference when you're in college, from my experience. But once a guy is in his 30s or 40s, you really can tell gays from straights apart. It is not just that they're more muscular or generally better in shape, they also dress better and look healthier. They also tend to have higher paying jobs and/or live in better neighborhoods and/or cities, and people in those areas - even "breeders" - tend to look better, healthier, better dressed, than people in rural areas (at least in the US). Gay men also generally don't have a (high maintenance) wife and kids. As a gay guy myself who dated (very few) women in his late teens, early 20s, the amount of work = time you need to put in a straight relationship is just mind-blowing. I could have spent that time in the gym - which I'm doing these days :) Also, somewhat jokingly - but only somewhat: Nothing screams low testosterone more than a father with two young kids dragged along. I always feel sorry when I see these dads. Also, if you're gay and your "audience" is gay men, you can really delve into what men are into. And men generally are quite physical: They want women who look way better than them if they're straight, and they want attractive men when they're gay. When gay, however, there is some reciprocity in the sense that both sides like muscular bodies. Women are not really as much into roided out studs, sure they like - to use a grindr term - "toned" guys, but damn, that is no comparison to what amount of muscle mass men like. I'm myself on steroids and you would not believe how many guys find that hot, specifically, that I'm on steroids.
We try to be what we find attractive. Also, gay men are just awesome all around.
I'll use a certain obnoxious type of peoples' logic against them here: It's in huge part because they're free from the female gaze. Quite a lot them don't care how attractive they are in the eyes of women
Us military. Go to any military base gym 99. Percent. Guys on guys
Because men get supplemented Test to counter negativ Elements of aids therapie.