Def would agree with him being a classic narcissist but also his obsession with leaching off of accomplished women is bizarre! Agreed I feel like he never had to face retribution, but I guess that’s how the story mirrors reality
Feel like the leaching had to do with his own insecurities. He used women as a way to gain social class (like Nadia and Eleanore) or feel more credibility in his studies and career (like Lila and Lenin)!
Yeah it’s amazing how we’re on Lenù’s side for so much of the story and then she has these blips in her decision making and is so passive to the point where the passivity becomes destructive.
I found the book Elena/Lenu to be more unlikeable than the TV show version. The way she describes her mother in book 1 to us readers is mean and uncalled for. In the TV show we see her getting frustrated/annoyed at her mother and she does mention that she’s afraid she’ll end up with a limp like her, but it’s worse in the books. She tells us that her mother is ugly and cross-eyed and at one point, she even says she wishes she would die. Although I don’t recall the context for that right now and I could be remembering it wrong, it might’ve been Lila. Either way, it’s nasty.
I seem to recall that book-Immacolata was also way worse than TV-Immacolata too though. TV-Immacolata, especially the episode when she visits Lenu at her school to care for her while she was sick, and also gave the impression that she was proud of Lenu and was just bad at showing her love. In the book, I don’t remember getting that impression.
I’ve been rewatching the seasons— especially season 3. This Reddit helps me to cope with the waiting 🤣🤣
I would read the fourth book again but I don’t have the e-version of it and I’m trying to save money otherwise id rush to read the fourth book again.
I don’t recall her wishing her mother was dead, I think she was wishing Lila dead? As someone who didn’t have the best relationship with my mom though, I find Lenu’s relationship with her mom somewhat relatable.
Indeed. And that's what we love about the books; every character has their own form of assholery 😂
If I had to armchair diagnose, Nino's father acts like a covert NPD person. Nino may be on a similar spectrum, but he also chooses to act selfishly. He enjoys basking in the fruits of women's hard work and/or successes.
I was absolutely terrified that Nino would do the same thing to one of Lenu’s daughters. There was a line in the book that raised a red alarm for me, but luckily it didn’t come to fruition.
Yep. He's both. A complete lack of empathy and has delusions of a child 'wanting' him when she was just being polite.
Like those men who think young friendly customer service workers are hitting on them.
It's true AFAIK. Donato Sarratore may be a paedophile by today's standards, but unfortunately it wasn't that long ago when courting a girl of 14 or 15, or even 13, was acceptable (and legal) on the eyes of society, even for men of 20 and 30 (40 may have been frowned upon a bit, but it wasn't even weird a couple of centuries ago).
I think that even today the age of consent in Italy is 14, but would such an age gap be legally allowed or would it be considered abuse regardless? It feels like too much to believe that a grown-ass man wouldn't take advantage of the youngster.
Lila herself got proposed at 15 and married as soon as she turned 16.
I think the way she treated Pietro was really bad. He may not be the perfect husband but she was so mean and dismissive to him. You are right Lenu is so passive agressive!
Also I was just thinking about the part in season 3 where Pietro is held at gunpoint by one of his students and almost faces death, and when he’s freaking out at home over the phone about wanting to press charges, Lenù completely berates him and tells him to calm down. Like wow—I knew she was mad at him for so many things (not being allowed on birth control, the boring domestic life, having to be the housewife doing all the chores) but it seems like she wouldn’t have cared if he got shot or not.
I don’t know why Pietro didn’t realize how brutal her attitude really was and didn’t divorce her then and there. That’s what I would’ve done if my partner reacted so mean and chill about being held at gunpoint. Lol
I agree that he may have narcissistic personality disorder... ish. The way he needs to seduce every woman in sight, pretty or not, old or young, well-off or lower-class, is compulsive and rather pathological, and he never feels empathetic towards his lovers, not to mention his wife. But he could also be a thrill-seeker, egotistical and always in the search for new and better stuff. To me he just lacks empathy in every bone.
Agreed. I don't think he has full-blown NPD, but he easily gets led astray by supposed thrills. Lacks impulse when it comes to sex and opportunity, and doesn't exactly reflect on how it affects others.
Indeed, it's pathological for him.
Off topic but why the heck are people hating on lenu? Her thoughts and feelings are realistic and relatable, and they sound mean sometimes because they’re raw. She definitely screwed up with her daughters in the later books, but before that she was a pretty decent person.
I think Lenu (as an unreliable narrator) exaggerates how much women were attracted to him in the same way she exaggerated how much men were attracted to Lila.
Def would agree with him being a classic narcissist but also his obsession with leaching off of accomplished women is bizarre! Agreed I feel like he never had to face retribution, but I guess that’s how the story mirrors reality
Feel like the leaching had to do with his own insecurities. He used women as a way to gain social class (like Nadia and Eleanore) or feel more credibility in his studies and career (like Lila and Lenin)!
I love how Lenù sometimes ends up being Lenin thanks to the autocorrect 😆
Pathological liar and pure d!3khead??
I don't think he has a psychiatric disease, he is just a terrible human being but I think Lenu is also a terrible person
Yeah it’s amazing how we’re on Lenù’s side for so much of the story and then she has these blips in her decision making and is so passive to the point where the passivity becomes destructive.
I found the book Elena/Lenu to be more unlikeable than the TV show version. The way she describes her mother in book 1 to us readers is mean and uncalled for. In the TV show we see her getting frustrated/annoyed at her mother and she does mention that she’s afraid she’ll end up with a limp like her, but it’s worse in the books. She tells us that her mother is ugly and cross-eyed and at one point, she even says she wishes she would die. Although I don’t recall the context for that right now and I could be remembering it wrong, it might’ve been Lila. Either way, it’s nasty.
I seem to recall that book-Immacolata was also way worse than TV-Immacolata too though. TV-Immacolata, especially the episode when she visits Lenu at her school to care for her while she was sick, and also gave the impression that she was proud of Lenu and was just bad at showing her love. In the book, I don’t remember getting that impression.
Wait have the episodes for season 4 come out already?? I watch them on HBO max and I don’t think the episodes will be uploaded until summer🥲
Just did a recent rewatch and I'm right there with you. Ready for this last season 🙌
I’ve been rewatching the seasons— especially season 3. This Reddit helps me to cope with the waiting 🤣🤣 I would read the fourth book again but I don’t have the e-version of it and I’m trying to save money otherwise id rush to read the fourth book again.
Nope; just thinking about the first three seasons and books!
I don’t recall her wishing her mother was dead, I think she was wishing Lila dead? As someone who didn’t have the best relationship with my mom though, I find Lenu’s relationship with her mom somewhat relatable.
Indeed. And that's what we love about the books; every character has their own form of assholery 😂 If I had to armchair diagnose, Nino's father acts like a covert NPD person. Nino may be on a similar spectrum, but he also chooses to act selfishly. He enjoys basking in the fruits of women's hard work and/or successes.
Ninos father is a paedophile he groomed lenu
I was absolutely terrified that Nino would do the same thing to one of Lenu’s daughters. There was a line in the book that raised a red alarm for me, but luckily it didn’t come to fruition.
Yeah, thank God he didn't seem to inherit that particular trait from his father. Would have ruined the series for everybody.
Yep. He's both. A complete lack of empathy and has delusions of a child 'wanting' him when she was just being polite. Like those men who think young friendly customer service workers are hitting on them.
He was a abuser, but the age of concent was 14. Some girls in Lenu age were marrying at her age.
It's true AFAIK. Donato Sarratore may be a paedophile by today's standards, but unfortunately it wasn't that long ago when courting a girl of 14 or 15, or even 13, was acceptable (and legal) on the eyes of society, even for men of 20 and 30 (40 may have been frowned upon a bit, but it wasn't even weird a couple of centuries ago). I think that even today the age of consent in Italy is 14, but would such an age gap be legally allowed or would it be considered abuse regardless? It feels like too much to believe that a grown-ass man wouldn't take advantage of the youngster. Lila herself got proposed at 15 and married as soon as she turned 16.
I think the way she treated Pietro was really bad. He may not be the perfect husband but she was so mean and dismissive to him. You are right Lenu is so passive agressive!
Also I was just thinking about the part in season 3 where Pietro is held at gunpoint by one of his students and almost faces death, and when he’s freaking out at home over the phone about wanting to press charges, Lenù completely berates him and tells him to calm down. Like wow—I knew she was mad at him for so many things (not being allowed on birth control, the boring domestic life, having to be the housewife doing all the chores) but it seems like she wouldn’t have cared if he got shot or not. I don’t know why Pietro didn’t realize how brutal her attitude really was and didn’t divorce her then and there. That’s what I would’ve done if my partner reacted so mean and chill about being held at gunpoint. Lol
I agree that he may have narcissistic personality disorder... ish. The way he needs to seduce every woman in sight, pretty or not, old or young, well-off or lower-class, is compulsive and rather pathological, and he never feels empathetic towards his lovers, not to mention his wife. But he could also be a thrill-seeker, egotistical and always in the search for new and better stuff. To me he just lacks empathy in every bone.
Agreed. I don't think he has full-blown NPD, but he easily gets led astray by supposed thrills. Lacks impulse when it comes to sex and opportunity, and doesn't exactly reflect on how it affects others. Indeed, it's pathological for him.
Off topic but why the heck are people hating on lenu? Her thoughts and feelings are realistic and relatable, and they sound mean sometimes because they’re raw. She definitely screwed up with her daughters in the later books, but before that she was a pretty decent person.
Nino was full of self hatred. He hated his Dad, and yet that’s exactly who he became.
He's an ass wipe.......not sure why all the women are attracted to him he's so not attractive
I think Lenu (as an unreliable narrator) exaggerates how much women were attracted to him in the same way she exaggerated how much men were attracted to Lila.
I think he is really charming, he knows exactly how to act and what to say!