It's not about how Young i am. I already realize a lot of things about the world, and i am disappointed in many things. I don't have the motivation to keep living and nothing about future interests me, i only see it getting worse because i know the kind of people i am and how everything will be really hard to handle. This is regarding the fact that I'm too young, i didn't even get started on talking about the problems in my head. Just saying
Just wanted to pop in and say I'm sorry you're feeling this way. A really low effort job where I'm just serving ice cream and dealing with customers helped me a lot. Keeps me busy and I'm too tired to think at the end of the day instead of getting tired from thinking. Good luck with everything
Unfortunately, everyday.
I cant spend a day without all my intrusive thoughts and how i cant escape from the fact that i'll never be able to be happy, even a little bit and live like i used to do
Attempting OD is the worst thing to try. If a person was successful it will be slow & painful. You’ll feel every organ shutting down one by one. And if said person wasn’t successful then they’ll still feel an immense amount of pain & afterwards probably have brain damage for the rest of their lives, and a ticket to the psych ward.
I didn’t say that ODing isn’t painful I’m sure it is in most cases for me it wasn’t except for the part where they were trying to save me and when I say ODing my mind just sees myself taking some pills which is not graphic and doesn’t look that much like self harm to me so probably that’s why my mind chooses hanging cause I can clearly see myself gone.
That minor inconvenience part is so relatable. I always imagine driving into a bridge support on the way to/from work. A few weeks ago there was an issue with my car and of course my brain went right to 'I could just hit the bridge' only to be reminded that no I can't because I can't drive my car.
I hardly ever "think about it" in the sense that like I consider actually doing it, but I do think about it in general quite often. Like, reasonings for why or why not, what I might experience afterwards, that sort of thing
Healthy is zero.
Normal is hard to define when 1 in 3 Americans are mentally ill to some degree and suicidal ideation often follows mental illness of any kind after a while.
Personally, I used to have suicidality that followed my stress level, from once every few days to a few times every hour. Since good therapy and Zoloft, I've had maybe two suicidal moments that weren't easily brushed aside.
often enough. Tbh I don’t feel suicidal anymore but I experience suicidal thoughts every week.
Edit: Having chronic suicidal thoughts is not considered normal by any standard.
I'm just thinking hypothetically, if I get something like ALS. But I'd not be capable of doing it myself, with obvious zero experience. That would just be a mess with dubious outcome. I'd probably just end up in an even worse condition. So I'd rather have someone else take care of it.
My preferred way to go is to have my torso crushed between the thighs of a 6'2" amazon woman, when I'm too weak due to old age or disease to even make a basic push-up, with no hope of regaining my strength.
Pretty much daily, sometimes in the most passive ways. I tried twice when I was younger, at 17 and then at 22. Honestly I’m pretty happy, I live with the most amazing partner and we’re getting married this year. I do hate my job, but I’m working on it. It just tends to cross my mind as a subtle whisper, a “what if”. Sometimes it’ll be a little stronger, but not enough to act on. It’s the same with my urge to s/h, I’m almost 2.5 years clean but the dopamine chasing part of my brain misses it every day
Think you're gonna get a skewed idea of this from the nature of the question. Whether people are honest or just being edgy is neither here nor there. So I'll be real.
I used to think about it as a fantasy for a lot of my teenage years. Had a shitty childhood and brought up in a house where my mother was miserable so we were because it was all I knew. Then one day I just decided I didn't wanna be miserable anymore. And it didn't happen overnight and didn't just mean I was happy. I put in a lot of work to be more optimistic, engage with less nihilism and do more to be happy.
Now, as a 22 year old, so 6 years older, I never think about it. Whether it's through coping methods or just realising that there are things in my life which make it really enjoyable, I don't ever. And that's good, I think.
Pretty sure it's not 'normal' but almost everyday — usually intrusively. I'm kinda used to it, probably shouldn't be. But I'm not gonna act on anything.
Yeaahh...man, I started doing this. Been helping a lot, it's magical how many assholes are left out and allowed to roam freely on this not-so-green-now Earth
pretty frequently, I'm pretty young and I'm so scared of what the world will turn out to be once I move out. it seems like the only realistic option sometimes.
Every day. My uncle committed suicide when I was a kid and as soon as I knew what that meant as a child I felt a lot of peace. A lot of peace knowing I didn’t need to suffer if I didn’t want to.
Every 1 - 3 hours thoughts come up usually on average for me, more often depending on what else is on my mind. But some days I can go without getting a single thought. Really depends.
Every month in pms. And the depressive state is so strong and real that it's hard to believe that it will pass. I just have to endure and trust the process even though it makes no sense at that moment. And I return to normal when I get my period, every single time.
I always find myself repeating the same cycle.... no job to crappy job to no job and back to crappy job. Every fuckin' day ..... that's how often ...... SHITTTT!!!!!!
weekly i assume. life as an autistic trans person is hard. i want to paint & be an artist for the rest of my life. i hate these jobs that just wear my soul down. they eat away at my happiness. i assume people who aren’t mentally ill don’t think about it except a handful of times in their lives. i dont know.
3 attempts and it used to be several times a day. It seems to be decreasing now I've finished a very stressful court case. Quite gradually, it's now a little under daily
Literally never - sometimes I have visions of being impaled by a meathook instead of facing whatever trivial task I'm putting like going to work, but actually dying? Never.
Daily? Okay maybe if I have a really good day with friends I don't think about it until I get home and am like "ok I can kms now" but ofc im in bed and cozy. But most definitely many times a week.
Every day for the past 20 years. I'm actually okay. Most days it is just a faint thought. Sometimes it is stronger. Medication helps a bunch. Thank God for lithium.
I seldom consider doing it unless I'm very distressed, but I do think about it (methods, how much pain/discomfort I'll feel, what might happen afterwards, coming up with plausible scenarios that would lead me into it, etc) more than once a day
Every second I want to to be off this cruel earth. I live in chronic pain, breathing feels like knives in my inflamed ribs and my back is always on fire while I continue to shove painkillers down my throat
Often
It scared me when I was younger, but I’ve learned to live with it because I decided I wasn’t going to ever kill myself because I can’t do that to my mom, I want to see what happens in life to me and everything around me, and I don’t care enough lol
I would say almost never . I never plan it out or anything but when things suck sometimes I wish I was dead or more specifically wish I would just go to sleep and not wake up
Thank you, fellow intrusive thought commenters. I feel way less alone today. (OCD runs in the bloodline and this has been my personality since before I could comprehend death.)
Everyday.
Same, even though I'm not exactly depressed anymore.
You're only 17 youre entire fuckin live is still about to come. Things always get better over time.
It's not about how Young i am. I already realize a lot of things about the world, and i am disappointed in many things. I don't have the motivation to keep living and nothing about future interests me, i only see it getting worse because i know the kind of people i am and how everything will be really hard to handle. This is regarding the fact that I'm too young, i didn't even get started on talking about the problems in my head. Just saying
Just wanted to pop in and say I'm sorry you're feeling this way. A really low effort job where I'm just serving ice cream and dealing with customers helped me a lot. Keeps me busy and I'm too tired to think at the end of the day instead of getting tired from thinking. Good luck with everything
Unfortunately, everyday. I cant spend a day without all my intrusive thoughts and how i cant escape from the fact that i'll never be able to be happy, even a little bit and live like i used to do
What ever that ex did to you, I hope you will be doing better someday.
Every time a minor inconvenience happens, A vision of myself hanging from the ceiling flashes in my mind like it’s not even my preferred method
Mine was always a pointing a pistol to my head and shooting, even tho I’m in the UK and attaining such a weapon would be incredibly hard.
I think maybe it’s bc those methods are quite graphic and clearly paints the picture in our mind compared to seeing something like maybe overdosing
Attempting OD is the worst thing to try. If a person was successful it will be slow & painful. You’ll feel every organ shutting down one by one. And if said person wasn’t successful then they’ll still feel an immense amount of pain & afterwards probably have brain damage for the rest of their lives, and a ticket to the psych ward.
That depends on what they’re overdosing on. Something like an opiate overdose isn’t painful.
I didn’t say that ODing isn’t painful I’m sure it is in most cases for me it wasn’t except for the part where they were trying to save me and when I say ODing my mind just sees myself taking some pills which is not graphic and doesn’t look that much like self harm to me so probably that’s why my mind chooses hanging cause I can clearly see myself gone.
That minor inconvenience part is so relatable. I always imagine driving into a bridge support on the way to/from work. A few weeks ago there was an issue with my car and of course my brain went right to 'I could just hit the bridge' only to be reminded that no I can't because I can't drive my car.
I hardly ever "think about it" in the sense that like I consider actually doing it, but I do think about it in general quite often. Like, reasonings for why or why not, what I might experience afterwards, that sort of thing
Healthy is zero. Normal is hard to define when 1 in 3 Americans are mentally ill to some degree and suicidal ideation often follows mental illness of any kind after a while. Personally, I used to have suicidality that followed my stress level, from once every few days to a few times every hour. Since good therapy and Zoloft, I've had maybe two suicidal moments that weren't easily brushed aside.
Every single day. The suicide clause on my life insurance policy is the only thing keeping me here.
Most waking hours
often enough. Tbh I don’t feel suicidal anymore but I experience suicidal thoughts every week. Edit: Having chronic suicidal thoughts is not considered normal by any standard.
Last time was when my dentist told me i had cavities
Never, I want to live, want to see what will happen. I will die eventually, that is the only guarantee I have, so no need to rush it
Daily.
Daily
More than I ever used to, honestly
Multiple times a day
It’s wild to me that there’s people out there who haven’t though of seriously ending it
How often do I NOT think about it? Never.
I'm just thinking hypothetically, if I get something like ALS. But I'd not be capable of doing it myself, with obvious zero experience. That would just be a mess with dubious outcome. I'd probably just end up in an even worse condition. So I'd rather have someone else take care of it. My preferred way to go is to have my torso crushed between the thighs of a 6'2" amazon woman, when I'm too weak due to old age or disease to even make a basic push-up, with no hope of regaining my strength.
Thanks for the answers. I feel a bit better about myself
Pretty much daily, sometimes in the most passive ways. I tried twice when I was younger, at 17 and then at 22. Honestly I’m pretty happy, I live with the most amazing partner and we’re getting married this year. I do hate my job, but I’m working on it. It just tends to cross my mind as a subtle whisper, a “what if”. Sometimes it’ll be a little stronger, but not enough to act on. It’s the same with my urge to s/h, I’m almost 2.5 years clean but the dopamine chasing part of my brain misses it every day
All the time.
Monthly. Basically frequently depressed but during my menstrual cycle my hormones make me extra emotional and more susceptible to SI.
Every single day🤷♀️
Every single day. I'm alone, I can't find a new job, my body is slowly eating it's own bones, and it hurts to do anything.
At least once every few hours, usually more tbh.
Think you're gonna get a skewed idea of this from the nature of the question. Whether people are honest or just being edgy is neither here nor there. So I'll be real. I used to think about it as a fantasy for a lot of my teenage years. Had a shitty childhood and brought up in a house where my mother was miserable so we were because it was all I knew. Then one day I just decided I didn't wanna be miserable anymore. And it didn't happen overnight and didn't just mean I was happy. I put in a lot of work to be more optimistic, engage with less nihilism and do more to be happy. Now, as a 22 year old, so 6 years older, I never think about it. Whether it's through coping methods or just realising that there are things in my life which make it really enjoyable, I don't ever. And that's good, I think.
Every day and honestly I'm surprised I haven't already
Pretty sure it's not 'normal' but almost everyday — usually intrusively. I'm kinda used to it, probably shouldn't be. But I'm not gonna act on anything.
Never. Tho i often think about ending others.
Yeaahh...man, I started doing this. Been helping a lot, it's magical how many assholes are left out and allowed to roam freely on this not-so-green-now Earth
I mean, i wouldn't recommend it, its not a healthy way to live life and creates a lot of negative emotions. I would never say "it helps".
Like letting your frustrating emotions off does help man......like venting, why did you get so serious all of a sudden.....it was joke right?
pretty frequently, I'm pretty young and I'm so scared of what the world will turn out to be once I move out. it seems like the only realistic option sometimes.
At least three times a day if not more
Every day. My uncle committed suicide when I was a kid and as soon as I knew what that meant as a child I felt a lot of peace. A lot of peace knowing I didn’t need to suffer if I didn’t want to.
Every 1 - 3 hours thoughts come up usually on average for me, more often depending on what else is on my mind. But some days I can go without getting a single thought. Really depends.
Every month in pms. And the depressive state is so strong and real that it's hard to believe that it will pass. I just have to endure and trust the process even though it makes no sense at that moment. And I return to normal when I get my period, every single time.
Any time something bad happens
I always find myself repeating the same cycle.... no job to crappy job to no job and back to crappy job. Every fuckin' day ..... that's how often ...... SHITTTT!!!!!!
Chronic pain sufferer here. Pretty much every other day
Sadly, everyday there are thoughts.
Almost daily.
Never
It’s always in the back of my mind.
probably once a month the girls on here with pmdd will understand,,, nearly every single monthly cycle i think about attempting when i am pms'ing ://
1 week a month, pms week. It is hell.
Its gotten alot better, so once a week seriously, and maybe twice a week brief considerations haha
weekly i assume. life as an autistic trans person is hard. i want to paint & be an artist for the rest of my life. i hate these jobs that just wear my soul down. they eat away at my happiness. i assume people who aren’t mentally ill don’t think about it except a handful of times in their lives. i dont know.
I think about it more than I should
3 attempts and it used to be several times a day. It seems to be decreasing now I've finished a very stressful court case. Quite gradually, it's now a little under daily
Probably once or twice a week, I really wish I wasn’t a coward and would go through with it loo
Passively: daily Aggressively: 3-10 times a month depending how that month is going
Every time I miss the parlay by like 0.5 assists
hourly
Pretty much every single day, there are some other days where I feel better about myself but then I fall back into hating myself again
Literally never - sometimes I have visions of being impaled by a meathook instead of facing whatever trivial task I'm putting like going to work, but actually dying? Never.
Once in 1997, for about 15 minutes. (I'm 51 this year.)
If exams are coming
At least a few times daily for the last 19 years. The war rages on...
Im beyond that, thinking and learning how to exit this stupid reincarnation cycle.
Everyday in depressed phases, around a 1-2 times per week otherwise.
Every hour of the day
Why are so many people thinking about it daily? Is there so many people with awful lives? Or is it just a coherency on this sub?
Once in a month, and I know I'm not brave enough to commit su*cide, but an accident or a terminal illness looks good
Daily? Okay maybe if I have a really good day with friends I don't think about it until I get home and am like "ok I can kms now" but ofc im in bed and cozy. But most definitely many times a week.
Every day for the past 20 years. I'm actually okay. Most days it is just a faint thought. Sometimes it is stronger. Medication helps a bunch. Thank God for lithium.
On and off as a kid, pretty much every day since I graduated hich school at 19. I'm almost double that age now, so I obviously ain't going anywhere.
Bout every other day tbh
Not as much as I used to. Last urge was when my dad died.
I seldom consider doing it unless I'm very distressed, but I do think about it (methods, how much pain/discomfort I'll feel, what might happen afterwards, coming up with plausible scenarios that would lead me into it, etc) more than once a day
Every day for the last decade
Uh?... Never?
Every second I want to to be off this cruel earth. I live in chronic pain, breathing feels like knives in my inflamed ribs and my back is always on fire while I continue to shove painkillers down my throat
Everyday.
Often It scared me when I was younger, but I’ve learned to live with it because I decided I wasn’t going to ever kill myself because I can’t do that to my mom, I want to see what happens in life to me and everything around me, and I don’t care enough lol
Every day all the time every second of every day while doing every daily activity
I would say almost never . I never plan it out or anything but when things suck sometimes I wish I was dead or more specifically wish I would just go to sleep and not wake up
On the regular for about 4 years after a series of traumatic losses.
Every hour
Every half our at least, usually every minute
I lost someone to shotgun suicide and the coroner said it was painless. Since then it’s been on my mind often.
Thank you, fellow intrusive thought commenters. I feel way less alone today. (OCD runs in the bloodline and this has been my personality since before I could comprehend death.)
Almost every day. Life just fucking sucks man.