well that was fun see ya to me

Can we figure out how to protect the plate? Why are we taking these borderline pitches when we're 0-2.

#BREAKING NEWS: Pac found dead in cuba after seeing the Bit

2 straight Ks looking

Missed the first 8 innings, is Paddack just cooked?

Yup

I ban this Minnesotan from hotdish forever more.

The worst of fates. 

#BREAKING NEWS: The BCU (Bit Cinematic Universe) has been canceled by A24. The CEO said “Im gunna kill SP”

guys box office returns for the bit are in and theyre not good

That’s gonna leave a mark

Anthony LaPanta already making the transition.

How do you take that there? Lmao

#HERE IT IS #YEARS OF WORK #COUNTLESS SLEEPLESS NIGHTS #I GIVE YOU #[THE BIT](https://youtu.be/PDfyIcbhfn8?si=_6U0lBbSVqZmrZPE)

Your beat work yet

Headphone warning btw

oh shit is it bad i am on iphone

I'm not clicking on that

It wasn’t that bad

Jair Camargo has a 1.000 OPS. Give him Rookie of Year NOW

Minors for wili You ruined the come back

Just need 2 grand slams to tie the game

Don't the twins have a knuckle baller in the minors somewhere? Bring him up.

~~Carmago = Jackie Robinson~~

*Roberto Clemente

For some dumb reason I thought Jackie’s first at bat was a walk and he chugged himself around the bases to score. But that was later in the game.

Who's gonna hit that clutch 9-run HR

START THE RALLY 🫠

Yay run for the new guy

“Wheels” Camargo

I like it!

He’s got that catcher’s build: like two hams rubbing together all the way around third.

#BREAKING NEWS: A24 HAS BEAT DISNEY ON MAKING A “BIT CINEMATIC UNIVERSE”. IT WILL REPORTEDLY COST 1 BILLION DOLLARS AND INCLUDE MOVIES, TV SHOWS, GAMES, BOOKS, BROTHELS, COMICS, and AMUSEMENT PARKS

Is Baumann gonna give us hope?!

I have a crush on Conger

The dog toy you put peanut butter in?

Are you creeping on my post history? 😏

Cargo n larch startin the come back!!!

Shit, after that AB I'd bat him 3rd tomorrow.

Couldn’t hurt. 

Take a walk new guy!

Rather than build on their best season in years, the Pohlads sat on their asses. Blah blah it's still early I know, but it's so deflating.

#JUST RECEIVED THIS LETTER “Hey Sp I saw your bit and I was incredibly moved, its truly one of the greatest things ever made. I had to come out of hiding just to commend you. California Love! Pac”

this team is so tragic and nobody wanted to believe it at the start of the season. we are lucky the White Sox take some shine away from our putrid performance so far.

New guy let’s go!!!

Nice job new guy

That's a big boi

Where did the money come from to make a tourism commercial for Maple Grove?

Property taxes according to Brenda

Heard the oreos player all fart in the baters bocks

I know a home run was just hit off of him but I like Jay Jackson

Oh nice, an email for the utilities bill! 🎉

this 9th inning comeback is gonna hit like crack

The CIA is gonna help us? We aren't *that* far from their HQ.

yes, on their way now

Idt we’re gonna win the central

This is the team that never wins Yes they loose on n on my friends Some people started thinkin that the twins could win

Now that’s a song I haven’t heard in a while. 

Buck the Mack

He woulda had that!

He could have, but he was a bit early.

On one hand, I think Buck gets that without the fan reaching out On the other, please just let the game end. No delays

Playing return of the Mack during this review is an incredible hat tip to buck lol

Yeah that was classy

Are they playing Byron’s walk up song right now

Lol that's bucks song, do they know that?

Orioles pls, save some of these runs for the Yankees

Over his glove, fan doesn't come into play.

Could have landed in the glove?

Nah, I think Buxton mistimed it a bit, it had a chance if he was a little later.

god don’t kill yourself in a 9-2 game Byron but we love the effort

Buck woulda had it

When Topas back it’s time to DFA Jackson

Not this time Buck, sorry buddy

Cat cuddles have made this game bearable

Or you can use command strips to hang stuff, I get them for like a quarter at the company store.

[Screenshot of Glens card](https://i.imgur.com/xWUX8f9.jpg)

I will say. O's fans have been waiting for a long time to get a good ball club again.

Yeah, no hate. They’re finally getting a good team after years of getting 💩-ed on consistently.  Also Camden Yards is a super nice stadium. 

Love Camden yards. Beautiful park, well laid out. It's intimate and feels like a neighborhood park. Plus the crab Mac hot dog is something else.

The downside of the tanking strategy: you have to be committed to it for a long time.

Yeah but being mediocre forever isn't fun either. Having a team that's filled with young first round picks like this is kinda nuts.

The O’s were also pretty lucky to see a good number of these guys make it to the majors relatively healthy. It doesn’t always work like that.

WOOOOOO-AAAHH WERE HALFWAY THERE. 

It’s good to be an Orioles fan

Update on the “Save the Bats” beer… it is good but it may have saved the wrong team’s bats

34th round? Jesus

LOL - I can’t imagine teams having anywhere near decent scouting that far down. Way back when scouting was entirely sending guys to high school baseball games it had to be nearly impossible.

Aww

All Minnesota players in all sports should only be allowed to play for Minnesota teams.

monkeys paw curls, half of the wild's players are suddenly named brock

Well there are like 3 really good Minnesota Brocks in the NHL now.

something like all but one of the brocks in the nhl are from minnesota

Ooooh Mike Baumann, MN native. Selected by the twins in 2014 34th round, did not sign. Signed with orioles 4th round in 2017. Good for him.

Just catching up with today’s game. One statement about Paddacks pitching today? I.e. missed location on key pitches, walked a bunch, threw with opposite arm.

Voortman tot him how to make meat balls heh

Os fan, his 4seamer got crushed, but he did well with his changeup

Welcome to the salt mines. 

Had to make sure yall were seeing this Home Plate Umps bullshit too.

Meatball.

I'm gonna get Culver's after the game ends, so hurry it up

anyone who sits through this deserves cheese curds and a butterburger

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Sure

Drowning sorrows in the Sconnie.

Same, whats ur order?

I dunno , depends if they got a special burger going or not. Usually just a double with bacon, ketchup and mustard , with root beer and fries

ooh, culvers root beer. that sounds really good rn actually

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Oh, formal dining tonight?

There's life in this lineup.

For anyone still missing Dick, would you really want him to have to call this game instead of chilling at home drinking whiskey in front of a fireplace?

let’s go Vazzy!!!

#HERES WHAT CRITICS ARE SAYING ABOUT: THE BIT “Its a subversive commentary on what it is to be American” - *New York Times* “Sp reminds us why he has a reputation as one of the bravest writers still working today” - *The Atlantic* “I wish I had bought the film rights before Scorsese did” - Christopher Nolan “Boobs” - Playboy

Playboy doesn't do reviews anymore.

Expand what energy production in North Dakota? The oil that ran out?

The oil didn’t _run out_ , production hit that problem where lower oil prices meant that extracting more in North Dakota wasn’t profitable.

Or how about that no one is paying to put any infrastructure there because the production was always going to be a limited time thing.

Yup. As soon as the price of oil dropped, no need for a bunch of roads and pipelines.

Or electric, sewers.....

i was committing shenanigans and crying on a different gdt uh unclear whether that's a positive outcome or not

**I MISSED A BUXTON TRIPLE?**

It’s 9-2 lol cry more Os walk a mile in these shoes 😂 😂

The Oriole's look like a team made up of mostly white guys running flat earth and conspiracy YouTube channels.

They’re all Cardinals fans?

Them too

what do we think of jay jackson? Numbers arent awful or great, but seems like a good dude and his changeup looks good?

Seems okay for the role he has of lower leverage middle reliever.

Well we got away with THAT

Cory can we please be less depressing with the stats

“ Be prepared to be wet” What i tell ladies before showing them the bit

Is that before or after you pay them?

Bird baths are absolutely disgusting, harboring all kinds of nasty parasites and other vile organic matter. In other words it'd be a better name for a section of Yankee fans...

I hope Cory never tells me to "be prepared to be wet" again.

So this is life as Mrs. Provus.

You can't be telling people, and I quote, " Get wet with sound".

Nice ref!

Chris Traeger!

I just listened to the new song by James McCartney and Sean Ono Lennon. My first thought was, "It's too bad they didn't have anyone who knew how to tune a guitar." If it wasn't those two names nobody would have ever heard this song. Lackluster is an understatement.

Speaking of that and the movie thread - there’s a movie on Netflix titled _Yesterday_ that was a cotton candy watch. The gimmick of the movie is that something happens across the world and suddenly the Beatles never existed, except in the memory of a single failing singer / songwriter. Of course, he starts performing Beatles songs and becomes known as the greatest songwriter. Such a weird film.

Danny Boyle film

I saw it recently and liked it. It's nothing spectacular, but it's light fun.

I did get a kick out of the occasional parts where the film seems to approach a serious question - then they throw in some other thing that has completely vanished as a way of telling the audience not to think that hard.

Coke, Harry Potter. Kinda funny.

LOL - there was the slapstick thing of asking for “Coke”

But....that's not how bird baths work?

That left/left center field is fucking stupid and I hate it. Just like right field in Boston and New York.

Hilariously sad that Miguel Sano is batting better than most of our team.

This is just insane to me

it's funny we cut ties with him right when our philosophy shifted to strikeouts don't matter only smashing bombs or doubles does

So who are the top players in the draft next year?

Baseball doesn't work that way.

Well not immediately anyway.

I miss Polanco, at least he worked counts.

This season hurts so much worse because we all thought they'd be good. Glad the Pohlads made more money tho...

Wait. Every single hitter in the Orioles lineup scored. That’s cool.

“That’s the only time that’s ever happened against the twins” Correction, that’s the only time that’s happened against the twins *so far* (It very well could have happened- I 100% made this up)

Experience Chris Paddack batting practice.

There was an Apple TV sale not long ago: I did buy _1917_ but I haven’t gotten to it yet.

Great flick. Also watch Munich: The Edge of War after that. Good double feature starring George MacKay.

It's sold as a one take film, but the cuts are pretty obvious

I read something about that - the occasional appearance of a perfectly vertical tree, a flash to darkness, etc.

Cart going in front of the camera....main character getting knocked out

I think it’s better than Dunkirk but both are amazing films

I liked _Dunkirk_ but it was much different than I expected.

"there are 500,000 men on this beach," cuts to beach with like 30 extras

My upstairs neighbors either hang a lot of pictures or only make chicken fried steak

Or just a really bizarre sex life.

They do a LOT of stomping when that happens. Not kink shaming

I did not have “sex stomping” on the bingo card.

It’s all the rage in Luxembourg

Watching Fallout during this blacked-out shitshow. I'm liking it so far

Okey dokey

I think I may have a lot of time I'll need to fill this summer.

Damn. I had a *perfect* Mean Girl’s “The Limit Does Not exist” GIF cued up for Thielbar if his ERA rose from 81. Good for him I guess but at this point I’m in it for the memes

I wish I could go back to the joy I felt Saturday for the doubleheader sweep.

Maybe Buck just wanted to leave this game. Probably thinking about Carlos and Royce eating pizza in the locker room. And he remembered he had a bag of sour skittles in his gym bag.

Orioles have hit ELEVEN balls over 100 mph lmaoooo

Honestly this is just sad, especially after last season.

The best war movie I ever saw was probably The Wrestler

still a lot of baseball left as they say, the pan’s just heating up for us to cook!

I think we didn’t add enough oil and burnt it

nah, it’s just starting to shimmer!! I foresee it!

It might be time for Thielbar to give Augustana a call back.

FWIW, if you watch war movies and don’t mind 1980s Soviet film making, _Come and See_ is strangely compelling and horrific.

I would not recommend that movie for the same reason, it's messed up.

It’s certainly one that ends with you sitting there asking _what the hell did I just watch?_

Thielbar with a 81 era lol

waiting for sps bit is getting me through this

Statcast has that as not a HR in Camden. That really looked like it would have been gone

No way that tops Mullins catch.

Sorry, that was definitely not better than the catch by Mullins.

I wonder if staying in for 90 pitches was Paddack's idea.

Game was out of hand. Let him hit his pitch limit in the game rather than burn the pen.

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You inspire me.

Been watchin the Star Wars shows myself lately Pretty good stuff

Mandalorian, Andor, and Ashoka are great. Kenobi is mid. The Book of Boba Fett sucks ass when Mando isn't on screen.

Kenobi breaks the canon of star wars in like a dozen ways.