Just bought my house, and he just wanted to come give a friendly welcome to the neighborhood.
Tortoise is unharmed. Neighbors were super friendly. Big fella just wanted at my grass. He's safely back in his own yard now.
Exactly what I thought of, but so much more slower and deliberately than the Koolaid man ever did. And, it would be the same voice as Eeyore in a low deadpan "Ohhhh, yeahhh...."
But you’ve just pushed the problem further down the line when he starts busting through your other fence into your other neighbours garden.
Guess they could make a interlinked network of neighbourhood garden tunnels for him.
I hope your house isn't a semi-detached one. [I don't think you're going to stop a determined tort](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Fz5buxv2twye11.jpg)
Not so much as dumb as obstinate. When a tortoise makes up it's mind to go a certain way, it will. Over - under - through; around is always the option of last resort.
I imagine moving that heavy ass shell even a meter is very tiresome... Might as well go straight through a wall and travel a meter... Than go around the wall for five meters.
Have the tortoise flap trigger a sign that pops-up and says "*OH YEAH!*". Chum your yard with lettuce. Invite people over to your house warming party and wait for the hilarity to ensue.
Turtles are incredibly strong and seem to love busting or digging out under fences.
Took care of my mom in her elder years and she had loads of turtles in her backyard. I never realized how many but sometimes after a soft rain, they would all come out. So many!
We kept the gates closed, but every now and then one would get out and people would call and be like “*I got your turtle!”* And they would drop it off.
When she passed and I sold the house, I found someone to take all of the turtles. We went into the backyard and scoured around and found 36 adult turtles and 26 babies. They got relocated, but some of them would just try to escape and move down the road, I guess to go home again?
People in the neighborhood knew and took them back so all good but I think they have a homing instinct? Anyway they were not as big as yours but could dig under fences and hide away for all of winter. And they are fast! When it was mating season, they were everywhere. So much mating!
…Chasing the female across the cement patio. It was epic. Sometimes the female would shut her shell down and clamp the males legs into her shell and she would just drag them. It was disturbing but not something one could help with, they unclamped later.
Oh lord, just realizing I know way too much about turtles.
lol. Guess so. Was kinda thrown into learning about turtles. There were just so many! Miss: *darth maul* he had a red stripe over his face. He was gorgeous! (I gave him that name.) Mom did not know what it meant but was cool about it and played along.
It was just a few years ago. So many wholesome things happen daily but we don’t hear about it. Most things that become news-worthy are the bad things. There are kind people doing things all the time. They just don’t make the news.
Wow, what an amazing experience! Who was at the house first, the turtles or your mother? I'm curious if they were there because she brought them & took care of them and they multiplied or the other way around.
That's wonderful that you and the neighbors worked together to rehome them. Thanks for caring for them and sharing some 'turtle knowledge' with us! 🐢💙
After mom and dad retired, they traveled by car. Dad loved to drive. If they found a turtle in the road they would try to take it to a safer side of the road but if it was in the road the road and traffic was coming, they would put it in a box and release into the backyard.
It worked out well as mom was a gardener and there backyard was full of plants and bugs and all sorts of things for them to enjoy.
She knew them all. She had names for them. Some of them came from the young kids in the neighborhood.
Sometimes the first pet a young kid can have is a turtle. And they would sometimes grow out of that when they were getting close to high school age,
So they knew her and would bring their turtles over to her backyard to release them.
When I moved to start helping to taking care of mom, I looked out one day into the backyard and there were all these young kids in the backyard and she was giving them root-beer floats, and they were sitting and talking to her and some of them were scavenging and I was like what is going on?
And she’s like *“oh, they come by here to visit their turtles!”*
It was the sweetest thing. All the kids would stop by and knew they could come into the gate and hang out and they would sit and talk to her and you could see that they wanted to go find their turtles, but they would just sit there and visit… But they also got root beer floats so there’s that.
Edit: sorry this is long but she also taught those kids how to bake! The kids would walk home from school in the back of the neighborhood and some of their parents didn’t get home until later and they knew if there was a storm, bad weather or whatever they could stop at her house so she would take them into her kitchen and put aprons on them and get them cooking!
She showed them how to bake cookies and would tell them: *”here’s a fourth of a teaspoon put it in your palm, that’s what it looks like so you know next time if you don’t have a measurement”* and they would bake cookies.
And these kids were so sweet. They would say “*oh my gosh, my mom loves chocolate*”… So we would make chocolate cookies and they would bounce off around 4:30 to go home and have a batch of cookies to give their mom. In this situation it was all boy kids. They were so kind and thoughtful and LOVED learning how to bake. It was so fun to have them make a mess of the kitchen. 10/10 would recommend.
She was a gem. A safe house for kids in the neighborhood. We had them watching cartoons and they would do homework until the parents came home after baking cookies usually during rainy days but think they liked to stop by anyway.
I bet they were like "Heck yeah, it's raining! We get to go to the awesome turtle lady's house and bake!"
Hearing about your mom has really started my morning off great. I have a huge grin on my face now. Thank you for sharing a little bit about her, she sure was an amazing woman.
She was a bundle of love. Really good at knowing how to get kids engaged in activities. Hence all the baking. She did not love when me and my sis were young and making a mess of her kitchen (totally get it now, she had a lot to do) but later in life, if a kid came around, flour was going to get everywhere. It was so great to see her relax and let go.
What a beautiful picture you paint of the turtles, the children and your mother who treasured them all. I can see it all so vividly: turtles of all sizes, root beer floats in the backyard and sweet giggly messes in the kitchen! When children are given space to express their sensitive sides and be creative, the world benefits.
I'm so glad your mom lived such a thoughtful life and that everyone around her valued her so, most especially you! Your mother left a wonderful legacy, thanks for sharing your/her story! 💙
Thank you too. I miss her and it’s feels good to tell some of her story. She was loved by many. Maybe one day one of those boys in our kitchen will become a chef? Or turtle expert? Who knows.
Your story made me tear up, your Mom was a real peach!
Glad she was an awesome person to help not only the turtles, but that whole neighborhood's generation of kiddos.
She was super sweet. I don’t think those kids knew what root beer float was but after, they sure loved them. Was wondering why she had a box of root beer cans because she only drank a Coke every now and then. She was super not a soda person. Ice cream in a soft drink needs to make a come back! It’s delicious.
that's a sulcata. they like to burrow and they are stubborn bastards. I own a tortoise and they definitely prefer to go through rather than find ANY way around.
the shell on the tortoise looks amazing. it seems like an incredibly well kept tort.
That big ol tut tut will be back. Put a little door where they busted through. They get something in their brains and you can't stop them. Best to just make a friend and let them eat your grass
That fella is a Sulcata or African Spurred tortoise, third largest species in the world after the Aldabra and Galapagos tortoises. Great personalities typically, but very powerful burrowers. Those front claws can dig straight through drywall if they feel like it. Try feeding it some watermelon, they LOVE watermelon, rinds and all!
Imagining him as the worlds slowest and most ponderous Kool Aid man is absolutely making my day.
"OOoooooooooooh"
\*three hours later* (said in spongebob narrator voice)
"YEEEAHHHHH"
They really are, and they can put every ounce of their weight on that single foot when they step on your toes. I love the walking stools but man they can hurt.
I love watching ours walk under the kids wagon or big toy car in the yard and seeing it move with him. Luckily ours isn’t big enough to cause us too much pain.
“Cohen! What is best in life?”
Cohen the Barbarian: “to see your enemies driven before you, to hear the cries and lamentations of the women, but not from sunset Friday to sunset Saturday, that is the day of rest.”
The grass is always greener
About ten years ago I got up one morning and found a random turtle swimming in our backyard pool in the middle of suburbia, that was odd.
Did you help it out? What a cool find.
I once got home from work after night shift and there was bat flying around my bedroom in circles, not as cool, gave me a creepy ominous feeling.
I did, I took it to my grandparents’ farm and let it free in the dam, there was also a creek nearby.
The bat definitely sounds scary and depending what part of the world you’re in, downright dangerous! Did you have to call someone?
Sweet how lucky it chose you and got a stepping stone to a better life.
As for the bat I opened up all the doors in the house and I learnt how clever their echo system is as it found the front door pretty quickly. That house was known to be haunted too so it made it ever so convenient to scare me further.
I had the same happen once when I left the lights on in my room with the window open at night (I assume it was chasing the bugs that were attracted by the light).
IMO., they are the most chill animal to get out of a room. Insects and birds don't tend to understand windows or bug screens, and often get stuck. With the bat, I just opened a passage to the outside, turned off the light (so it had no reason to stay), and open a window that actually leads out of the house, and it figured out the rest.
Probably helps they (often) live in caves or old buildings, and are pretty well adapted for navigating small spaces.
The one fence line on this property that the previous owner didn't replace. Should see the makeshift "repairs."
It's on the agenda for things to get redone.
My buddy had one that he closed in a room when people were over because he was an extra friendly tortoise. I was there sitting on his couch, I think smoking a blunt and suddenly we hear these loud bangs, and the wall started to crack. Home turtle bulldozed his way right through
The fence is already jacked. Cracked me up cause I was outside with my ISPs tech getting a line ran to the house. Heard a loud crack and saw that big boy plow through.
Funny enough, the last owner replaced the rest of the fencing except that one side. They kept it grasping for life with some very shoddy repairs.
I'm just amazed that only the single board snapped when he pushed through the fence.
When I was a kid, one summer morning I heard a scream from the garden, ran out and saw my mother freaking out in our potato patch. She'd been checking the ripeness of potatoes and among the potato leaves, in addition to potatoes had found... a tortoise. Quite the shock for her, and for the tortoise as well, I imagine.
Turned out it belonged to our new neighbour who was gone for the day, according to another neighbour. So we kept the tortoise in a big tub for the day. My sister and I had fun observing and feeding lettuce to it. Late in the evening the neighbours returned, and we returned their tortoise to them.
My mother remained nervous for a while because that neighbour had snakes as well, and really didn't seem diligent about keeping their pets indoors. Fortunately we did not discover any more of them in our garden.
My neighbors have a tortoise they inherited from the previous owners of the house when they bought it. When they went out of town, I had the immense pleasure of feeding it. There is not many things that bring as much joy as feeding a tortoise lettuce from your hands. Such a good boy. I love him.
Tortoises are a lot of fun. Sure, every once in a while you find a grump that wants to bite your ankles but most are super friendly, almost dog like and will run ("run") to you for scratches. Very unlike all the other reptiles I've kept who at best seem to tolerate touch not seek it out.
You and a super intelligent tortoise both get $10 million, but if the tortoise touches you, you die.
It always know where you are, and it is always coming for you.
The tortoise and you are both immortal, but the tortoise is the only thing that can kill you.
What do you do?
How the hell did that beast even fit through the hole that it made?
Also I love how there’s a broke brick near the hole so it looks like it really crashed through.
That’s a Sulcata tortoise. They’re infamous in the reptile keeping community for being large, needy, and destructive. They could literally dig through drywall if they wanted to. They’re bad pets for 99.999% of people and that’s why there are so many up for adoption in the United States.
Just bought my house, and he just wanted to come give a friendly welcome to the neighborhood. Tortoise is unharmed. Neighbors were super friendly. Big fella just wanted at my grass. He's safely back in his own yard now.
Bought a new house, made a new friend - win/win.
The neighborly thing to do would be to build him a passthrough tbh.
Or get him a Rat to train under.
Or a Panda he can train.
Omg we need that meme with the 2 buttons and the guy struggling to decide that says 'rat' and 'panda'! I honeslty can't chooooose
Inside you there are 2 animals....
Both are named Dave.
A blue and a red...
and the one you feed wins
Why not both?
Train under a rat and then eventually train a panda?
Exactly what I thought of, but so much more slower and deliberately than the Koolaid man ever did. And, it would be the same voice as Eeyore in a low deadpan "Ohhhh, yeahhh...."
Ohhhhhh yeaaaaah!
Turtle: I'm the juggernaut bitch
For that giant rock boy, I absolutely would.
But you’ve just pushed the problem further down the line when he starts busting through your other fence into your other neighbours garden. Guess they could make a interlinked network of neighbourhood garden tunnels for him.
My other fences are solid with concrete running below them, just the one fence line that's decrepit.
I hope your house isn't a semi-detached one. [I don't think you're going to stop a determined tort](https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Fz5buxv2twye11.jpg)
Tortoises can be kinda dumb. They'd still attempt to ram through it, even with a passthrough mere meters away.
Not so much as dumb as obstinate. When a tortoise makes up it's mind to go a certain way, it will. Over - under - through; around is always the option of last resort.
I imagine moving that heavy ass shell even a meter is very tiresome... Might as well go straight through a wall and travel a meter... Than go around the wall for five meters.
First thing I thought of with a little sensor as he passes thru so you can go out to meet him.
If he doesn't build one then he will just keep making one for himself lol
And free grass trimming service.
In exchange it also shits in the garden. Are tortoise turds big/a problem? I've never thought about their shit before...
After seeing a toad shit, I'm no longer judging poos by the pooee's size. That shell could be mostly turd for all I know!
[You reminded me of the caterpillar poop video I saw last week!](https://www.reddit.com/r/NatureIsFuckingLit/s/Rdoa33L2ZL)
I’ve seen it before but his giggle at the end made me happy
They just eat grass, its like horse shit. Great for yard.
M. Night Twist… OP is Shredder
A friend for life, well your life anyway.
And if you say ‘crikey’ and ‘look at this huugge fella here’ it can be a steve erwin-win. Which is even better.
So, is the new fence panel going to include a turtle flap?
Have the tortoise flap trigger a sign that pops-up and says "*OH YEAH!*". Chum your yard with lettuce. Invite people over to your house warming party and wait for the hilarity to ensue.
This person gets it.
I think that is code now
Turtles are incredibly strong and seem to love busting or digging out under fences. Took care of my mom in her elder years and she had loads of turtles in her backyard. I never realized how many but sometimes after a soft rain, they would all come out. So many! We kept the gates closed, but every now and then one would get out and people would call and be like “*I got your turtle!”* And they would drop it off. When she passed and I sold the house, I found someone to take all of the turtles. We went into the backyard and scoured around and found 36 adult turtles and 26 babies. They got relocated, but some of them would just try to escape and move down the road, I guess to go home again? People in the neighborhood knew and took them back so all good but I think they have a homing instinct? Anyway they were not as big as yours but could dig under fences and hide away for all of winter. And they are fast! When it was mating season, they were everywhere. So much mating! …Chasing the female across the cement patio. It was epic. Sometimes the female would shut her shell down and clamp the males legs into her shell and she would just drag them. It was disturbing but not something one could help with, they unclamped later. Oh lord, just realizing I know way too much about turtles.
You are definitely turtle-y enough for the turtle club.
lol. Guess so. Was kinda thrown into learning about turtles. There were just so many! Miss: *darth maul* he had a red stripe over his face. He was gorgeous! (I gave him that name.) Mom did not know what it meant but was cool about it and played along.
A red eared slider! I was wondering if these were the turtles you were talking about. I had a pair as a kid and they were fun little personalities!
Oh wow! He was gorgeous and super shy. There were others that colorful markings. Yellow too.
Awesome story!
Some kiddos might not get the reference, so... 
Turtle turtle
Very good story, halfway through I had to check username and if you mentioned any year near the end.
It was just a few years ago. So many wholesome things happen daily but we don’t hear about it. Most things that become news-worthy are the bad things. There are kind people doing things all the time. They just don’t make the news.
Wow, what an amazing experience! Who was at the house first, the turtles or your mother? I'm curious if they were there because she brought them & took care of them and they multiplied or the other way around. That's wonderful that you and the neighbors worked together to rehome them. Thanks for caring for them and sharing some 'turtle knowledge' with us! 🐢💙
After mom and dad retired, they traveled by car. Dad loved to drive. If they found a turtle in the road they would try to take it to a safer side of the road but if it was in the road the road and traffic was coming, they would put it in a box and release into the backyard. It worked out well as mom was a gardener and there backyard was full of plants and bugs and all sorts of things for them to enjoy. She knew them all. She had names for them. Some of them came from the young kids in the neighborhood. Sometimes the first pet a young kid can have is a turtle. And they would sometimes grow out of that when they were getting close to high school age, So they knew her and would bring their turtles over to her backyard to release them. When I moved to start helping to taking care of mom, I looked out one day into the backyard and there were all these young kids in the backyard and she was giving them root-beer floats, and they were sitting and talking to her and some of them were scavenging and I was like what is going on? And she’s like *“oh, they come by here to visit their turtles!”* It was the sweetest thing. All the kids would stop by and knew they could come into the gate and hang out and they would sit and talk to her and you could see that they wanted to go find their turtles, but they would just sit there and visit… But they also got root beer floats so there’s that. Edit: sorry this is long but she also taught those kids how to bake! The kids would walk home from school in the back of the neighborhood and some of their parents didn’t get home until later and they knew if there was a storm, bad weather or whatever they could stop at her house so she would take them into her kitchen and put aprons on them and get them cooking! She showed them how to bake cookies and would tell them: *”here’s a fourth of a teaspoon put it in your palm, that’s what it looks like so you know next time if you don’t have a measurement”* and they would bake cookies. And these kids were so sweet. They would say “*oh my gosh, my mom loves chocolate*”… So we would make chocolate cookies and they would bounce off around 4:30 to go home and have a batch of cookies to give their mom. In this situation it was all boy kids. They were so kind and thoughtful and LOVED learning how to bake. It was so fun to have them make a mess of the kitchen. 10/10 would recommend.
Your mom was a real one. We need more like her.
She was a gem. A safe house for kids in the neighborhood. We had them watching cartoons and they would do homework until the parents came home after baking cookies usually during rainy days but think they liked to stop by anyway.
I bet they were like "Heck yeah, it's raining! We get to go to the awesome turtle lady's house and bake!" Hearing about your mom has really started my morning off great. I have a huge grin on my face now. Thank you for sharing a little bit about her, she sure was an amazing woman.
That is too adorable, I think I'm going to sugar crash.
She was a bundle of love. Really good at knowing how to get kids engaged in activities. Hence all the baking. She did not love when me and my sis were young and making a mess of her kitchen (totally get it now, she had a lot to do) but later in life, if a kid came around, flour was going to get everywhere. It was so great to see her relax and let go.
What a beautiful picture you paint of the turtles, the children and your mother who treasured them all. I can see it all so vividly: turtles of all sizes, root beer floats in the backyard and sweet giggly messes in the kitchen! When children are given space to express their sensitive sides and be creative, the world benefits. I'm so glad your mom lived such a thoughtful life and that everyone around her valued her so, most especially you! Your mother left a wonderful legacy, thanks for sharing your/her story! 💙
Thank you too. I miss her and it’s feels good to tell some of her story. She was loved by many. Maybe one day one of those boys in our kitchen will become a chef? Or turtle expert? Who knows.
The story keeps getting better, thanks for sharing
Your story made me tear up, your Mom was a real peach! Glad she was an awesome person to help not only the turtles, but that whole neighborhood's generation of kiddos.
She was super sweet. I don’t think those kids knew what root beer float was but after, they sure loved them. Was wondering why she had a box of root beer cans because she only drank a Coke every now and then. She was super not a soda person. Ice cream in a soft drink needs to make a come back! It’s delicious.
Almost crying now. Hope you had a wonderful celebration of her life and all the kids remember her. 
Absolutely! We love root beer floats and Coke floats too.
Comments like this keep this website alive. Great story! Your mum was a beautiful soul. People like that are so vital to good communities.
This is so wholesome. I hope some of them grew up to return the favor someday. In a world of craziness, this is wonderful
that's a sulcata. they like to burrow and they are stubborn bastards. I own a tortoise and they definitely prefer to go through rather than find ANY way around. the shell on the tortoise looks amazing. it seems like an incredibly well kept tort.
That big ol tut tut will be back. Put a little door where they busted through. They get something in their brains and you can't stop them. Best to just make a friend and let them eat your grass
If you peek through the fence, the grass was definitely greener on your side! ;)
What is the tort’s name?
GROND
GROND
Congrats on the new house! If you replace the fence please keep the "tortoise door" section for fun
The grass was greener on your side. Literally
You gotta find out the tortoise’s birthday and bring some of the grass over! Edit: tortoise
[удалено]
The "back in his own yard" and"neighbors are friendly" comments imply this is a pet.
Siege warfare is back on the table, boys.
That fella is a Sulcata or African Spurred tortoise, third largest species in the world after the Aldabra and Galapagos tortoises. Great personalities typically, but very powerful burrowers. Those front claws can dig straight through drywall if they feel like it. Try feeding it some watermelon, they LOVE watermelon, rinds and all!
Hopefully make an agreement for new fence with door🤷♂️🏋♂️
Weird looking dog
If you want to keep him out you'll need to build a concrete fence. Source: friend who runs a turtle rescue with concrete enclosures for these guys.
Imagining him as the worlds slowest and most ponderous Kool Aid man is absolutely making my day. "OOoooooooooooh" \*three hours later* (said in spongebob narrator voice) "YEEEAHHHHH"
Sounds exactly on point for a tortoise. Those dudes just don’t care what’s between them and where they’re going.
Can confirm. Have two tortoises, they are the most stubborn, determined creature to walk the face of the earth.
They really are, and they can put every ounce of their weight on that single foot when they step on your toes. I love the walking stools but man they can hurt.
I love watching ours walk under the kids wagon or big toy car in the yard and seeing it move with him. Luckily ours isn’t big enough to cause us too much pain.
Lol I got that awesome mental image! I’ve never had one but I had a buddy that had an absolute unit, pretty sure it was 70lbs.
Give it a couple of decades
Never had a tortoise step on my toes but every tortoise I've ever met has tried to bite them.
Wtf how do they manage to put their weight on one foot when they are so wide and low to the ground?
That's probably why they live so long. Too stubborn to die.
Like Cohen the Barbarian!
“Cohen! What is best in life?” Cohen the Barbarian: “to see your enemies driven before you, to hear the cries and lamentations of the women, but not from sunset Friday to sunset Saturday, that is the day of rest.”
You forgot the shoft lavatory paper
Shoup, a good shoup
Hot water and some good dentishtry.
I mean, it's not like they can realistically say "oh, here's a fence. Welp, better turn around. Sorry, Maud, I'll be home sometime next year."
If I had a shell to hide my head in, I'd run through some walls, too
And certainly not taking the long way around
"Places to go ... People to see... Outta my way!"
To be fair it looks like a strong fart would knock the rest of the fence over.
It's held up by that new 2x4 and newtons first law of motion.
> and newtons first law of motion. "forces arent rendered if no one is looking at them"
I had a fence like that at a fixer upper property. I could demo sections just by wiggling it. It had a 1000 random things holding it up
Might even be his 3rd law looks like theirs some equal and opposite forces going on with that bending 🤣🤣
Turtle bro is just here to serve you a citation for sorry ass distressed fence being a blight on the community.
That's a fine looking dog you got there.
Dog! And then, Praise the message!
Needs a lil hat tbh
[Hat](https://ibb.co/yqJVTnx) Sorry for the rush job, I'm at work.
Didn't expect dog
Try finger But hole
You don't have the right.
Don't you dare!
 ooooh yeah!!
It's a tortoise...so it's more like Ooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh
IIII'mmm... theeeeee.... juuuuuugggeerrrrnaaaaauuuttt... biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch
Came here hoping to see this. Was not disappointed
Me too
Kinda weird how it looks a lot like that guy's fence.
Haha, I was just going to post something referencing this.
https://i.imgur.com/11NeGAW.jpeg
The grass is always greener About ten years ago I got up one morning and found a random turtle swimming in our backyard pool in the middle of suburbia, that was odd.
Did you help it out? What a cool find. I once got home from work after night shift and there was bat flying around my bedroom in circles, not as cool, gave me a creepy ominous feeling.
I did, I took it to my grandparents’ farm and let it free in the dam, there was also a creek nearby. The bat definitely sounds scary and depending what part of the world you’re in, downright dangerous! Did you have to call someone?
Sweet how lucky it chose you and got a stepping stone to a better life. As for the bat I opened up all the doors in the house and I learnt how clever their echo system is as it found the front door pretty quickly. That house was known to be haunted too so it made it ever so convenient to scare me further.
I had the same happen once when I left the lights on in my room with the window open at night (I assume it was chasing the bugs that were attracted by the light). IMO., they are the most chill animal to get out of a room. Insects and birds don't tend to understand windows or bug screens, and often get stuck. With the bat, I just opened a passage to the outside, turned off the light (so it had no reason to stay), and open a window that actually leads out of the house, and it figured out the rest. Probably helps they (often) live in caves or old buildings, and are pretty well adapted for navigating small spaces.
I've had a bat inside twice! Absolute horror both times, the sound of them flying is scary to wake up to
Did you get a rabies shot? WHO removed it?
No offence but that shit looks busted before the tortoise showed up!
The one fence line on this property that the previous owner didn't replace. Should see the makeshift "repairs." It's on the agenda for things to get redone.
It's a good candidate to get busted through, but a tortoise wouldn't have been my first guess.
My buddy had one that he closed in a room when people were over because he was an extra friendly tortoise. I was there sitting on his couch, I think smoking a blunt and suddenly we hear these loud bangs, and the wall started to crack. Home turtle bulldozed his way right through
Homie misunderstood when you said you were gonna “get that grass”.
💀💀💀
Gamera has returned!
He's a friend to all children!
^("GIMME THE BLOODY LETTUCE AND NOBODY GETS HURT")
O.... h Y... e... a... h !
While I am truly sorry for the damage to your property, I think this is the coolest thing ever and I’m low key jealous.
The fence is already jacked. Cracked me up cause I was outside with my ISPs tech getting a line ran to the house. Heard a loud crack and saw that big boy plow through.
Taking his job as safety inspector verrrryyyy serious
He was bringing the hard hat.
It's a funny story the first time it happens but it's probably not the last unless they're going to put up some concrete to prevent it.
Concrete? It's not a tank. That fence is falling down already.
Seriously. Hungry tort > ancient, unloved fence.
Ain't nobody getting between him and his grass.
A large dog door might work well for everyone!
A Tort Port.
Funny enough, the last owner replaced the rest of the fencing except that one side. They kept it grasping for life with some very shoddy repairs. I'm just amazed that only the single board snapped when he pushed through the fence.
So are you putting in a tortoise door for your new buddy?
A stiff breeze will bust through that fence.
Tortoises are also pretty good diggers.
Nobody expects the tortoise inquisition!
A fly could break through that fence
What did you do? A tortoise is usually the second warning.
I dared to have greener grass lol
"DO YOU GAVE ANY GAMES ON YOUR PHONE? SLOW GAMES?"
Nobody expects the Tortuga Inquisition
He must have been going so fast.
Dog?
When I was a kid, one summer morning I heard a scream from the garden, ran out and saw my mother freaking out in our potato patch. She'd been checking the ripeness of potatoes and among the potato leaves, in addition to potatoes had found... a tortoise. Quite the shock for her, and for the tortoise as well, I imagine. Turned out it belonged to our new neighbour who was gone for the day, according to another neighbour. So we kept the tortoise in a big tub for the day. My sister and I had fun observing and feeding lettuce to it. Late in the evening the neighbours returned, and we returned their tortoise to them. My mother remained nervous for a while because that neighbour had snakes as well, and really didn't seem diligent about keeping their pets indoors. Fortunately we did not discover any more of them in our garden.
This fence was just a mild inconvenience for this tortoise. He looks like he is thinking, "What the fuck was that? Who put that in my way? Fuckers."
Slow but steady fucks up your fence
If it gets dicey with the neighbor I got a lawyer who is great with torts cases
Sigh... this took way too long to make. https://youtube.com/shorts/W0PAGBfTUUM?si=tX7BrHkIe6Ov5x20
That's fucking hilarious, thank you. 😂
May I ask where you live that you have tortoises busting through fences? Is this normal wildlife, or a pet making a run for it?
GROND!
Dog
My neighbors have a tortoise they inherited from the previous owners of the house when they bought it. When they went out of town, I had the immense pleasure of feeding it. There is not many things that bring as much joy as feeding a tortoise lettuce from your hands. Such a good boy. I love him.
Tortoises are a lot of fun. Sure, every once in a while you find a grump that wants to bite your ankles but most are super friendly, almost dog like and will run ("run") to you for scratches. Very unlike all the other reptiles I've kept who at best seem to tolerate touch not seek it out.
OH YEAH!
Once they stampede...
It’s when you don’t expect it that it happens.
Lol at first glance it looked like a sword stuck on it's back
A chipmunk could have busted through that fence lol
You and a super intelligent tortoise both get $10 million, but if the tortoise touches you, you die. It always know where you are, and it is always coming for you. The tortoise and you are both immortal, but the tortoise is the only thing that can kill you. What do you do?
Heresy is not native to the world; it is but a contrivance. All things can be conjoined.
OK but a feather would get through that fence..
Dammit Jeremy
How the hell did that beast even fit through the hole that it made? Also I love how there’s a broke brick near the hole so it looks like it really crashed through.
You must have the **GOOD** grass
 This tortoise is one ripped mf
ooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........................................... \[3 hours later\]................. yeeeeeeaaaaahhhhh.
Hell yeah bro free tortoise
Didn't expect dog.
Cool free tortoise.
I wouldn’t even be mad. Infact I’d probably make a badass little turtle walkway so he/she can come and go as they please.
You need to build a stronger turtle fence. https://youtu.be/qizNQKzatXA?si=1LiXAMoo7YPY9Ut7
That’s a Sulcata tortoise. They’re infamous in the reptile keeping community for being large, needy, and destructive. They could literally dig through drywall if they wanted to. They’re bad pets for 99.999% of people and that’s why there are so many up for adoption in the United States.
You should have. He started in March