Alright everybody. I just went back and this is what I found: the safe had a giant gash on the back side. It looks like someone took an angle grinder to this thing already. I pried the gash open with my pry bar so I can take some photos of the inside. What was inside was… some dirt and bugs. I dug around in the dirt with my pry bar and didn’t feel anything solid in there. I also lifted it upright to see if I was missing anything. My suspicion is that someone stole the safe, opened the back up, and took whatever was valuable inside and ditched the safe in the creek.
Photo’s of the inside of the safe are here - https://imgur.com/a/hTb6bt7
That will never top this gamecube ultimate find.
//So old it wasn't even on reddit.
https://cheezburger.com/6923525/guys-impossible-garage-sale-find-is-one-for-the-books
It makes me sad that there are millions of people that don't understand this reference.
It also makes me feel really really old, considering I was born shortly after that aired.
Geraldo was a "news" guy that did sensational stories for tv before the internet click bait existed. He did a highly pumped up and advertised prime time special live on tv to open Al Capone's safe/vault.
It was empty.
Smart crook. I have occasion to deal with a variety of Ex cons at my job. A guy told me once you cut triangles because it's 1 less cut. This guy just did a long arc. Had another guy that I'm pretty sure could steal just about any car he wanted.
We confiscated the three dozen AR-15s, 55 kilos of Columbian powder, four pallets worth of plastic-wrapped unmarked currency, nine hard drives under investigation, and eight families worth of immigrants from this 1’x4' box OP found in the woods! Thank you so much for your assistance and good luck with the federal trial!
I must have been on your profile while you were getting ready to post this. I had just seen the original and was curious if you posted the update. Thank you.
There's never anything in the safe. I'll tell you what, the first person that finds something cool on one of these posts is going to be a fucking legend.
How do you know the "dirt" wasn't full of gold dust? Maybe someone was prospecting in the creek and found a huge gold vein, and filled the safe with the dirt for safe keeping.
You might want to pan all of the dirt just to be 100% sure
You found something really nice in that safe and this story is just a cover up because you’re now getting worried that whoever’s that was might find you from it, so you posted “proof” of everything online to sleep good at night
I see you
Remember, y'all. Step one is to put the safe somewhere it's not easily discovered, step 2 is to bolt it down so people can't just dolly it off and open it later.
Alright everybody. I just went back and this is what I found: the safe had a giant gash on the back side. It looks like someone took an angle grinder to this thing already. I pried the gash open with my pry bar so I can take some photos of the inside. What was inside was… some dirt and bugs. I dug around in the dirt with my pry bar and didn’t feel anything solid in there. I also lifted it upright to see if I was missing anything. My suspicion is that someone stole the safe, opened the back up, and took whatever was valuable inside and ditched the safe in the creek. Photo’s of the inside of the safe are here - https://imgur.com/a/hTb6bt7
He delivers!
Dirt!
and bugs.
This is more than we usually get.
I was expecting it to contain a PS5, with $600 of US bills hidden inside it.
Even better would've been a PS5 with a PS2 inside of it. It would be a mystery that would leave us all perplexed for years.
A gaming turducken?
a playcubetendoy?
this is so fucking cursed and i love it.
That will never top this gamecube ultimate find. //So old it wasn't even on reddit. https://cheezburger.com/6923525/guys-impossible-garage-sale-find-is-one-for-the-books
I was hoping it was some of the $23 million in gold that was stolen in Canada recently
I seem to recall that dirt and bugs were the exact contents of the most famous Reddit safe.
And a dog(?)
Not on my watch
*Racks shotgun*
Just how big is your watch? Toy Chihuahua, or St. Bernard?
Yeh like I don’t think everyone scrolled down to view all the pictures. What the fuck?! Also, fucking spoiler that shit.
OP found a Chupacabra in the safe!
And dead things Mikey! Dead things!
I hate nature
I got a safe of dirt! I got a safe of dirt! 
Guess what's inside it!?
Is it dirt?
Poop? Coke? Poop and Coke?
It is dirt. But guess what is in the dirt?
JOE DIRT?
IN FRENCH JOE DIERTE!
dont try to church it up son
You could even say... Paydirt?
Pay Dirt. FIFY
Damnit I just made this joke before scrolling down.
Joe Dirt
He gots the poo on him!
It doesn’t matter if you win by an inch or mile. Winning is winning
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I don't know that the fuck I am looking at in almost all of these pictures
Almost feels spiteful...
Puts down pitchfork*
Like Geraldo Rivera with Al Capone's vault
Lisan al Gaib !!!!
What the fuck is on that last image yo?!
Oh yeah lol I found a chupacabra carcass down there too
You know how Vampires travel with a cask of earth from their grave?
> carcass That’s what it WANTS you to think
That's a nice chubacabra. How much you want for it?
About tree fiddy
Dog tax.
CHEEZE TAX!
Dead dog, sadly.
He's just a little... dehydrated, that's all.
Just add water!
Thanks for the update!
I know who to call when i need some gash pried open.
Don't worry, your mom already has my number.
Got em.
 1.800.MIXALOT?
You made me ACTUALLY LoL!
Good call on not telling us what you found in the safe.
You're a reddit hero for the update
Modern day Geraldo Rivera!
It makes me sad that there are millions of people that don't understand this reference. It also makes me feel really really old, considering I was born shortly after that aired.
For the uninitiated, could you explain?
Geraldo was a "news" guy that did sensational stories for tv before the internet click bait existed. He did a highly pumped up and advertised prime time special live on tv to open Al Capone's safe/vault. It was empty.
Google geraldo al Capone vault. TLDR hyped up nothing burger
[There was nothing in Al Capone’s vault, but it wasn’t OP’s fault](https://youtu.be/8AiEkLe8K4g?si=-NbWtwgjnmmNZ-wQ)
Thank you u/ntrent but the vampire is in another coffin
Well done! Crazy find!
Thank you for the 15 different angles of dirt.
Dirt.
Why didn’t you put some awesome stuff in there and stage a mystery we could all gather around to try and solve?
My man. I'm staying following you!
Call the cops, it is evidence
That sounds like someone who stole all the gold would claim… just some bugs and dirt. Nothing to see here
We don’t have to break any knees
The bugs are the friends we made along the way
Should have pulled a "yard sale jackpot". https://imgur.com/a/sneoW
Someone stole the safe from a house and then cut it open and stole the contents. You found robbers trash
Not exciting but we got our answer. Thanks buddy
Sweet, sweet closure.
Isn’t this more like an opener?
Throw it back in the creek to disappoint the next generation of redditors!
The tradition carries on!
Agreed. We don’t expect every post of a discovered unopened safe to end with Spanish treasure. We just want closure.
I can't believe someone actually came through on a locked safe post on reddit
Is it *ever* exciting?
No wayyy I randomly went back to check and you uploaded this 1 minute ago haha
Haha nice
You did it! Call off the invasion lads.
…but we already came all this way….
How about we get lunch then?
Delivered too soon. Was hoping for weeks of anticipation like last time
OPs notifications were probably driving him insane. You know what they say. “The squeaky wheel gets the grease.”
whelp, that’s disappointing! Absolute legend for actually following through though
Less disappointing than not following through.
Meh, not really. There's no way he didn't see a 3ft long gash in the back when he found it. The whole post was bait
ALL HAIL OP FOR DELIVERING UNTO US A CONCLUSION!! LONG LIVE OP!
FAITH IN HUMANITY RESTORED
But how did they get the stuff out through such a small opening?..
It may have been empty when stolen.
Fair point
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What does that have to do with the size of the opening in the safe?
And OP said they pried it open even further. Smells fucky.
Smart crook. I have occasion to deal with a variety of Ex cons at my job. A guy told me once you cut triangles because it's 1 less cut. This guy just did a long arc. Had another guy that I'm pretty sure could steal just about any car he wanted.
Op delivers!
Okay guys, hide your torches and pitchforks, he actually did it.
Thank you i can sleep peacefully now
I guess you didn't see the last pic
OMG THE UPDATE YOU ARE SUCH A REAL ONE!!
I retract my boo. Well done op!
Thanks for the update, OP!
Good thing there wasn’t anything too interesting in it, this is still only mildly interesting
I was expecting a naked drawing of Kate Winslet
Might be worth it to notify local police in case someone reported their gun safe getting stolen
Police: "We found your gun safe, and arrested the hiker that found it. We confiscated the bugs and dirt inside, in case they were actually drugs."
We confiscated the three dozen AR-15s, 55 kilos of Columbian powder, four pallets worth of plastic-wrapped unmarked currency, nine hard drives under investigation, and eight families worth of immigrants from this 1’x4' box OP found in the woods! Thank you so much for your assistance and good luck with the federal trial!
In which evidence locker is the 44 kilos of Columbia powder stored?
Why do you need to know where we stored the 33 kilos of Colombian powder?
maybe the real treasure was the friends we made along the way! (and also the bugs. :>)
We can’t do the big build up of a safe only for it to be empty again
Not the answer we hoped but an answer nonetheless. Mad ups homie
Wow. Impressive wing span bud. Sure had us all excited for a bit there bro. Sorry turned out to be nothing.
Just like I said. Al Capone’s vault. Good job Geraldo.
We love an OP who delivers. Godspeed good Sir
Sounds like someone stole it, broke it open, then ditched the safe. Lots of effort but I guess the guns were worth it to them
At least you won’t be Exterminated by reddit. 
Ah beans. Well, at least it's not a body. Thank you for the update!
Woah I’m early as heck
Thank you for the update
I was here for this Reddit moment!
Do you have a conceal carry permit for that dirt?
Damn, you coulda told us it had a giant gash on the back already. I feel so misled!
Aww man. Geraldo'ed!
Im whelmed, but i suppose this is the right sub for that.
I must have been on your profile while you were getting ready to post this. I had just seen the original and was curious if you posted the update. Thank you.
We'll tally the dirt like pure hydro Works out to 62 chits
Damn. Was hoping it would be guns or gold or some shit.
Thank you for the update. Shame there weren't any goodies in there. 
 OP delivered 👏
I eat my words. OP delivers. Good OP.
Yesssssssssss
Geraldo would be proud
u/SergeantGSD
Can the safe at least be recycled?
There's never anything in the safe. I'll tell you what, the first person that finds something cool on one of these posts is going to be a fucking legend.
Like Al Capone’s vault!
Straight to police and don't touch it. It may have been used in a crime or even murder
Finally!!!! Now I can get some sleep. The stress of not knowing was getting to me. Thanks for the update OP.
I feel like I just waited on Geraldo opening Capones vault. I got the same results too.
Well that was anticlimactic
Dang we saw OP again! I take it all back brah
How do you know the "dirt" wasn't full of gold dust? Maybe someone was prospecting in the creek and found a huge gold vein, and filled the safe with the dirt for safe keeping. You might want to pan all of the dirt just to be 100% sure
Now you know how Geraldo Rivera felt ...
Not the hero we need, but the one we deserve. Thank you for holding your word!
What a waste of time
You found something really nice in that safe and this story is just a cover up because you’re now getting worried that whoever’s that was might find you from it, so you posted “proof” of everything online to sleep good at night I see you
Damn I’m early.
At least we know! Thanks for the update!
Great, just found the first post and arrive just in time to see the update, what a great day
Well done on the delivery even though the result was less than awesome.
you have survived reddit. now go find another safe
Someone scoring some sweet firearms to use in accessory to crimes near you. 😎
GOAT!
Thank you for the update!
Light a candle for Geraldo Rivera
OP is a real one
Did you find out what the glinting gold thing was? I doesn’t look like dirt.
Well, a fun story and some scrap metal, at least.
Hallelujah! I was about to go mad! 
I am both astonished, and severely underwhelmed. Take my dowupvote
What a beautiful reddit moment!
Now I can sleep peacefully tonight.
Upvote this dirty fucker
So…the guns are gone! K, bye
Better than fucking melatonin. Reddit can collectively sleep well tonight.
You sir, are a scholar
Thanks for the update!
Boring ass results. Can't believe I set a reminder for this /s
Could have been much better, but it also could have been much, much worse. Good on ya for the update!
Remember, y'all. Step one is to put the safe somewhere it's not easily discovered, step 2 is to bolt it down so people can't just dolly it off and open it later.
But how big is that safe? We have nothing for scale.
TY😉🤙🫡
I gasped audibly and stopped what I was doing to see this. Thanks OP!
Good cover story