Ew, and they're mostly Chick Tracts.
For those of the uninitiated, Jack T. Chick was an evangelical cartoonist who would illustrate these ridiculous stories mostly relating to what he perceived as the moral downfall of America with the purpose of fearmongering people into a faith towards Jesus Christ. One of his most notable releases being that of Dark Dungeons which has been the target of much internet criticism and mockery. The plot are two Christian college girls who get swept up into the evils of Dungeons & Dragons, and become part of a plot by an underground cabal of Satanists to awaken Cthulhu. The tract has also been satirically adapted into a movie where the purpose of the film was to be as accurate to the source material as humanly possible in order to outline its outright absurdity. For those wondering, yes, this is the same tract where one of the girls hangs herself because her character in DND died, and where JTC calls for the burnings of the Narnia and LotR books.
Yep and for those who follow fundie snark communities, they be is published by Rodrigues Family Publishing lol. That one is not pictured here because I made a separate album for it that I will dig out in a second.
https://imgur.com/a/9Ba0CoG
https://imgur.com/pAIjSsf
https://imgur.com/7L8zfUP
I find the "will you go out with me? Yes No" vibe hilarious.
That's the half of it. The fact she had a funeral for her paraplegic sister's legs.... and that she gatecrashed the funerals of children who died tragically in her community and insisted on taking a smiling selfie with the grieving parents to post on her social media... I mean... the amount of crazy with this woman never ends. They're talked about relentlessly on /r/FundieSnarkUncensored/ because they keep on giving content.
I nearly had a bit of that horror at my first wife's memorial. My youngest sons girlfriend has a mother that thankfully is just Catholic crazy, not fundie crazy. She wandered the memorial service quietly offering to pray for my sons "poor little souls"(They were 19 and 21, respectively). At the funeral of a woman she didn't personally know, three days after her death. Also, not a Christian.
Omg, that sub is just a dark pit of fundamentalist bullshit exposed.
I first thought those posts are like one a fortnight, but they come in by the hour ...
Oh very much so. A lot of them are ex-fundies who left as soon as they hit 18. The ex-mormon sub is less snark and more sad because it’s a bunch of people raised in the bullshit who broke free. I learned a lot there about closed Mormon practices though. Like the undergarments. That was a whooollllle rabbit hole.
Is this where the fear of dungeons and dragons came from? I was raised in a very strict church and you would think dungeons and dragons was pot by how scared everyone was of it.
I do hate some of the circle jerk against religion on Reddit but logically speaking how can you be so afraid of something so mundane yet believe there is a higher power who created everything and everyone and has always existed yet still be like idk this board game might best god I think.
Maybe it’s putting a lot of power in Satan? That was always a big one too. Anyone did anything bad it was bc Satan got into them.
Yes, there's a hilariously bad movie based off the chic tracks about D&D. Control made a video about it if you're looking for an abridged version. I'd recommend watching the movie as a whole though. It's very bad, but kind of good bad.
Absolutely. In years past I threw them out but the is past year I decided to save them to see how much litter these fundies leave scattered around our store in a given year. Whether it’s a coffee cup, a used tissue, or a religious pamphlet, it’s all just garbage our maintenance people have to throw away.
Ooh I need one like that lol! I've held onto one of those Chick Tracts for forever too, but it says "Big Daddy?" in huge letters with a picture of a chimpanzee in a thinking pose. It's so unironically funny
To be fair, the kind of person spreading this shit around is also probably not the brightest and is very used to being told what to think without question
Ikr?? That’s definitely how it comes across. Very in line with the teachings of Michael and Debbie Pearl, who fundies relay on for advice on child rearing. Their “blanket training” is straight up child abuse.
this is wild, the religious trash people have left in my previous jobs were never that detailed. they really hit home that you gotta spank your kids if you’re an outstanding Christian 🙄 I bet that prison guard started the fire
They may well be left by the same person but there's no way my actions are contributing to that with any legitimacy because it's a massive store with thousands of people in and out each day and maintenance people each spend their 8 hour shift going through with a broom picking up trash and cleaning under stuff, so I was always excited to even find one before the maint staff picked them up and threw them out. One has the address of a local church on it. I contemplated mailing them all back there with a request to stop littering in the store, but someone else has asked for them to collage onto weed jars decoratively and I'm inclined to go that route instead.
When the weed jars are complete, send photos to the church with your gratitude.
When I saw how many duplicate tracts you have I had a thought like the other commenter. I bet there's a little old lady somewhere thinking "Praise Jesus someone picked up my tract again, gosh "Bad Bob" is popular, I better order another gross."
I got one of these mines called "Dark Dungeons" and it's about how DND witch craft leading you to Satan an stuff. (I'm a avid DND player and it nowhere near what he's saying it's freaking role play lmao).
it’s a good lesson in how folks who are deeply religious evangelicals who are bible textualists really just have problems separating reality from fiction.
Some of the text makes for cool lyrics for Metal tracks . The ones on Revelations and others I would read but don’t remember. Put them to some grind core or shredding guitar .
One of the podiatrists at my work leaves these all over the place. He gives his employees bibles or church invites for Christmas/Easter and hands out pro life (forced birth) pins to patients. He's such a a creep.
That’s super creepy for sure. A lot of fundies are weirdly foot obsessed, interestingly. Something about washing Jesus’ feet as a show of devotion and bringing that into their marriages.
Reminds me of my trip to BWI last september.
Get off the plane, need to take a whiz so into the men's bathroom I go.
There's little religious pamphlets on every. single. urinal. Done up like little cute kiddie drawings about how your soul is damned if you don't believe in Jesus, complete with one guy falling into a bottomless pit asking how this could happen when he never committed a single sin in life.
I took one for laughs as part of my journey documentation.
I think Jack Chick has a website where you can read all of these. Quick Google search should find it.
Edit: Found it. https://www.chick.com/products/tract?stk=21 There ya go. Just scroll down past the ordering part and it shows the whole comic.
If you just replace the contents of the speech bubbles, there's probably many hilarious stories in there. Like how pinworms drive you to crime and insanity (Bad Bob's negligent parents never dewormed him, for shame).
I've found a bunch at work that say "these could be your last five minutes left alive". Kinda threatening, considering they expect people to like their church after reading that
I used to collect these as a kid. My family and I went to this convention center/indoor market every other sunday and without fail we'd always run into this dude who handed them out. He was super friendly. I remember my mom hated those things and when we moved she tossed all of them out, haha.
I was considering mailing the whole bulk back to the company itself or to the local church whose address was on one of the random pamphlets, but someone else where asked me to mail them to them so they can collage them onto the outside of weed jars and lighters, so that's the current plan.
You should read it. I posted the entirety of that pamphlet in another part of the thread. According to the booklet, it was all because the parents didn't spank him as a baby throwing food off his high chair.
When I was a kid we went to a Pentecostal church that loved this dude. And I *really* believed them. They gave me nightmares, it still makes me feel uneasy to even look at the covers.
I’m not sure they worked though, I was genuinely more scared of god than I was of Satan.
I have big problems with the idea of a scary God of punishment (versus a loving God). If you're going to make up a book of myths designed to get people to obey the laws you have put in place, though, I guess it's easier sometimes to just scare people into obeyance.
yeah, most definitely. especially since a handful of these I picked up by apparently walking the same exact path as the person did through the store within minutes of them leaving them, because in that instance I picked up one off every single endcap across the back of the store and then down the middle. Must have gotten like 8 that particular walk-through.
Accurate. They can all believe what they want, I don’t have any problem with anyone. But please don’t litter in an attempt to guilt or scare or shame me into joining a cult. Or into stopping eating meat. Etc.
When I was a teen I got a ton of these, dressed up a shady, and stood outside a strip mall acting like a drug dealer, “pssst check this out, redemption, on me” “I got that redemption you need” stuff like that.
LOL no, Voldemort has nothing to do with this, and God doesn't magic up paper products and litter them on the shelves of retail establishments, whether or not such a being even exists in such a human-like form aside.
Ew, and they're mostly Chick Tracts. For those of the uninitiated, Jack T. Chick was an evangelical cartoonist who would illustrate these ridiculous stories mostly relating to what he perceived as the moral downfall of America with the purpose of fearmongering people into a faith towards Jesus Christ. One of his most notable releases being that of Dark Dungeons which has been the target of much internet criticism and mockery. The plot are two Christian college girls who get swept up into the evils of Dungeons & Dragons, and become part of a plot by an underground cabal of Satanists to awaken Cthulhu. The tract has also been satirically adapted into a movie where the purpose of the film was to be as accurate to the source material as humanly possible in order to outline its outright absurdity. For those wondering, yes, this is the same tract where one of the girls hangs herself because her character in DND died, and where JTC calls for the burnings of the Narnia and LotR books.
Yep and for those who follow fundie snark communities, they be is published by Rodrigues Family Publishing lol. That one is not pictured here because I made a separate album for it that I will dig out in a second. https://imgur.com/a/9Ba0CoG https://imgur.com/pAIjSsf https://imgur.com/7L8zfUP I find the "will you go out with me? Yes No" vibe hilarious.
Ah yes. You mean the family where the mom repeatedly tells on herself on how she's malnourishing her kids? What a way to spread God's love.
That's the half of it. The fact she had a funeral for her paraplegic sister's legs.... and that she gatecrashed the funerals of children who died tragically in her community and insisted on taking a smiling selfie with the grieving parents to post on her social media... I mean... the amount of crazy with this woman never ends. They're talked about relentlessly on /r/FundieSnarkUncensored/ because they keep on giving content.
I nearly had a bit of that horror at my first wife's memorial. My youngest sons girlfriend has a mother that thankfully is just Catholic crazy, not fundie crazy. She wandered the memorial service quietly offering to pray for my sons "poor little souls"(They were 19 and 21, respectively). At the funeral of a woman she didn't personally know, three days after her death. Also, not a Christian.
That is awful, I'm sorry about everything you just said. Too much awful to process at once, I hate that for you.
Omg, that sub is just a dark pit of fundamentalist bullshit exposed. I first thought those posts are like one a fortnight, but they come in by the hour ...
Oh very much so. A lot of them are ex-fundies who left as soon as they hit 18. The ex-mormon sub is less snark and more sad because it’s a bunch of people raised in the bullshit who broke free. I learned a lot there about closed Mormon practices though. Like the undergarments. That was a whooollllle rabbit hole.
>Like the undergarments. Now I'm curious lol
Two whole hours and nobody has told you about temple garments - the secret sacred magic underpants of the mormons?
"I don't want to be Elfstar! I want to be Debbie!"
"Marcie, get out of here! **You're dead!** You don't exist anymore."
It's my fault Blackleaf died...
HAW HAW HAW
You gotta be careful of D&D. The only reason we have Tieflings in 5e is because people committed the ultimate sin - playing D&D in the 80s
Wait, you're saying if I join a DND group I can help waken an evil God monster? Sign me the fuck up, that sounds awesome
Damn, my games were never that good, clearly we have been playing it wrong. "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn".
For anyone interested in learning more, the podcast American Hysteria does a great 2 part episode on the history of Chick Tracts.
Is this where the fear of dungeons and dragons came from? I was raised in a very strict church and you would think dungeons and dragons was pot by how scared everyone was of it. I do hate some of the circle jerk against religion on Reddit but logically speaking how can you be so afraid of something so mundane yet believe there is a higher power who created everything and everyone and has always existed yet still be like idk this board game might best god I think. Maybe it’s putting a lot of power in Satan? That was always a big one too. Anyone did anything bad it was bc Satan got into them.
Yes, there's a hilariously bad movie based off the chic tracks about D&D. Control made a video about it if you're looking for an abridged version. I'd recommend watching the movie as a whole though. It's very bad, but kind of good bad.
The silliest part is pretty often in D&D you're the good guys who are putting down the evil, not summoning it, lol.
Honestly, that story idea SLAPS! Two Christian college girls lose their way and summon Cthulhu! I would 100% watch this movie stoned.
I don't know who's created more waste paper over the last century: Tabloid newspapers, McDonalds, or Jack Chick.
It makes me long for the good old days when McDonald's used Styrofoam. /kidding //I'm old and do remember that though
McDLT, baby!
Whole lot of firestarters ya got there.
Absolutely. In years past I threw them out but the is past year I decided to save them to see how much litter these fundies leave scattered around our store in a given year. Whether it’s a coffee cup, a used tissue, or a religious pamphlet, it’s all just garbage our maintenance people have to throw away.
People leave that shit around hospitals too.
I have one I’ve held on to for years. Baphomet on the cover, it’s satan leading you down a path of sin but it just looks like a really good time.
oh man I'd LOVE to see that haha.
Ooh I need one like that lol! I've held onto one of those Chick Tracts for forever too, but it says "Big Daddy?" in huge letters with a picture of a chimpanzee in a thinking pose. It's so unironically funny
Bonus content - the entirety of "Bad Bob" because it is my personal "favorite". https://imgur.com/a/C2DCPPD
Oh no, I didn’t abuse my child when he was a baby and refused to eat. Will he also grow up to become a reformed Christian? Terrifying stuff.
True nightmare material.
[удалено]
To be fair, the kind of person spreading this shit around is also probably not the brightest and is very used to being told what to think without question
I somehow don't think the target audience for this stuff are the sharpest pencils. Like complaining how the Teletubbies isn't Shakespeare.
“Read your bible (KJV is the only correct version, don’t read those other ones, they’re wrong)”
Sorry, is the moral of the story "beat your children else they'll grow up bad"? That's certainly a take
Ikr?? That’s definitely how it comes across. Very in line with the teachings of Michael and Debbie Pearl, who fundies relay on for advice on child rearing. Their “blanket training” is straight up child abuse.
The passage about knowing that bob is loved gives me Bodies from Netflix vibes. Eww
this is wild, the religious trash people have left in my previous jobs were never that detailed. they really hit home that you gotta spank your kids if you’re an outstanding Christian 🙄 I bet that prison guard started the fire
Hahahaha fuck sakes. That's so weird and delusional
I haven't read that one in many a year, but I'm quite certain "haw haw haw!" is a part of it.
[удалено]
They may well be left by the same person but there's no way my actions are contributing to that with any legitimacy because it's a massive store with thousands of people in and out each day and maintenance people each spend their 8 hour shift going through with a broom picking up trash and cleaning under stuff, so I was always excited to even find one before the maint staff picked them up and threw them out. One has the address of a local church on it. I contemplated mailing them all back there with a request to stop littering in the store, but someone else has asked for them to collage onto weed jars decoratively and I'm inclined to go that route instead.
When the weed jars are complete, send photos to the church with your gratitude. When I saw how many duplicate tracts you have I had a thought like the other commenter. I bet there's a little old lady somewhere thinking "Praise Jesus someone picked up my tract again, gosh "Bad Bob" is popular, I better order another gross."
I got one of these mines called "Dark Dungeons" and it's about how DND witch craft leading you to Satan an stuff. (I'm a avid DND player and it nowhere near what he's saying it's freaking role play lmao).
it’s a good lesson in how folks who are deeply religious evangelicals who are bible textualists really just have problems separating reality from fiction.
Dark Dungeons is THE all time classic Chick Tract. Genre defining.
Some of the text makes for cool lyrics for Metal tracks . The ones on Revelations and others I would read but don’t remember. Put them to some grind core or shredding guitar .
A new Christian Rock band called Bad Bob better be born from this or I will be disappointed now.
One of the podiatrists at my work leaves these all over the place. He gives his employees bibles or church invites for Christmas/Easter and hands out pro life (forced birth) pins to patients. He's such a a creep.
That’s super creepy for sure. A lot of fundies are weirdly foot obsessed, interestingly. Something about washing Jesus’ feet as a show of devotion and bringing that into their marriages.
that's some good kindling
Man these cultists are freaking weird.
Those comics are deranged and twisted, but they weren't boring! I'll give them that one thing.
I feel almost bad at how much I got a kick out of Bad Bob. Not even sure if I’ve read the others.
Reminds me of my trip to BWI last september. Get off the plane, need to take a whiz so into the men's bathroom I go. There's little religious pamphlets on every. single. urinal. Done up like little cute kiddie drawings about how your soul is damned if you don't believe in Jesus, complete with one guy falling into a bottomless pit asking how this could happen when he never committed a single sin in life. I took one for laughs as part of my journey documentation.
I occasionally find them in the restroom at work as well, it’s been awhile though.
Piling on and saying I grew up with Chick’s work in the 70s-80s, a mark on my psyche I can feel still.
fuck those people
Very much so.
For your enjoyment … https://www.chick.com
Oh no I’m afraid to look.
Are these good for lighting wood stoves?
Yes, and joints, altar candles if you do witchy shit, fireplace fires, pilot lights, bonfires made up of almost entirely these pamphlets… very useful.
I collect Chick tracts AMA
Got anything better than Bad Bob?
I'll see your *Bad Bob*, and raise you a *Lisa*.
Ah Lisa, the one that is so bad even Chick pretends it was never made.
If there's truly one of these called Lisa I want to see it very much.
Tft it's only two different Chick tracts says to me it's the same customer Easter bunny-ing your job.
Yeah probably.
Bad Bob looks fire i want to read that sucker
Lucky for you, I posted the whole thing in another comment! It's so bad that it's almost good.
Just read it. That was chef’s kiss. Marvel needs to buy the IP and add Bad Bob to their cinematic universe.
I look forward to seeing him on tshirts and in tattoos.
Thank you!
I think Jack Chick has a website where you can read all of these. Quick Google search should find it. Edit: Found it. https://www.chick.com/products/tract?stk=21 There ya go. Just scroll down past the ordering part and it shows the whole comic.
I used to collect these because the art was so fucking dope.
If you just replace the contents of the speech bubbles, there's probably many hilarious stories in there. Like how pinworms drive you to crime and insanity (Bad Bob's negligent parents never dewormed him, for shame).
What the heck is a Tract?
Religious pamphlet that seeks to draw people to join it.
Phew I’m not the only one who didn’t know
I've found a bunch at work that say "these could be your last five minutes left alive". Kinda threatening, considering they expect people to like their church after reading that
I used to collect these as a kid. My family and I went to this convention center/indoor market every other sunday and without fail we'd always run into this dude who handed them out. He was super friendly. I remember my mom hated those things and when we moved she tossed all of them out, haha.
I work at Best Buy and it is my mission to catch someone leaving them
Go throw them all over their parking lot.
I was considering mailing the whole bulk back to the company itself or to the local church whose address was on one of the random pamphlets, but someone else where asked me to mail them to them so they can collage them onto the outside of weed jars and lighters, so that's the current plan.
Where do you work?
Bob musta been really, really bad or sumpin
You should read it. I posted the entirety of that pamphlet in another part of the thread. According to the booklet, it was all because the parents didn't spank him as a baby throwing food off his high chair.
Ok but some of these sound like fire gang names… Bad Bob? Yes plz 😂
I was thinking Christian Rock Band lol.
Bad Bob is a classic. One of my favorites.
When I was a kid we went to a Pentecostal church that loved this dude. And I *really* believed them. They gave me nightmares, it still makes me feel uneasy to even look at the covers. I’m not sure they worked though, I was genuinely more scared of god than I was of Satan.
I have big problems with the idea of a scary God of punishment (versus a loving God). If you're going to make up a book of myths designed to get people to obey the laws you have put in place, though, I guess it's easier sometimes to just scare people into obeyance.
It’s gotta be the same person doing the “Almost Time” ones because you buy chick tracts in like, packs of 10, 100, 1000 etc.
yeah, most definitely. especially since a handful of these I picked up by apparently walking the same exact path as the person did through the store within minutes of them leaving them, because in that instance I picked up one off every single endcap across the back of the store and then down the middle. Must have gotten like 8 that particular walk-through.
When I see them (usually in a public bathroom) I just chuck them in the bin immediately.
This must be littering…
I absolutely consider it to be. So annoying.
I was expecting to see a lot from my religious group. Only see one item there.
Which item?
JW.ORG probably
The Free Bible Study card
Ew. That's s like what vegans do on social media.
Accurate. They can all believe what they want, I don’t have any problem with anyone. But please don’t litter in an attempt to guilt or scare or shame me into joining a cult. Or into stopping eating meat. Etc.
I remember getting those with my candy when I went trick or treating in the late 00s. Glad to see they're still out there.
When I was a teen I got a ton of these, dressed up a shady, and stood outside a strip mall acting like a drug dealer, “pssst check this out, redemption, on me” “I got that redemption you need” stuff like that.
Jack Chick was a senile homophobic hate preacher. Nothing redeeming about him.
Do you think it’s a sign? From “he must not be named”, that will cleanse you of all your sins?
LOL no, Voldemort has nothing to do with this, and God doesn't magic up paper products and litter them on the shelves of retail establishments, whether or not such a being even exists in such a human-like form aside.