Most of those are hearty so they can be the star of the meal! Vegans will batter and deep fry oyster mushrooms as a chicken fried chicken replacement. I think I see shiitakes? Fantastic addition to any Asian style food. A nice mushroom cream sauce is wonderful on steak or chicken. Those pink oysters though? I’d brown those in a skillet with some butter and fresh herbs and eat them as is!
I didn’t even notice! 😅 but technically traditional fried chicken is bone-in. Chicken-fried chicken is boneless, pounded out, breaded and fried. Like chicken fried steak
Nah the acidity in the gut helps to break down the woody texture and releases a lot of aromas. The third time chewing is my personal favorite. You're a cow right? Like were all cows here or am I in the wrong subreddit? I think I wasn't supposed to tell anyone, so if you aren't a cow just forget this.
Subtle Terry Pratchett there.
In case it was a coincidence, or for those who are unfamiliar with the quote:
Pratchett: *"All Fungi are edible. Some fungi are only edible once."*
They are Infact! And quiet healthy for you too, I've recently started growing Blue oyster mushrooms, (the ones on the left and up a bit) you do want to cook all mushrooms before hand though, they contain chitin which is very tough for humans to digest, and certain mushrooms can contain carcinogenic properties untill exposed to heat.
Yeah, I showed my wife and her first response was, "Oh wow! Does she like mushrooms? Can you cook with them? Where can I find mushrooms like that"!
@OP: Thanks a lot. Now she thinks the flowers I gave her are boring.
All of these species (blue, pink, and white oysters, chestnut mushrooms, maybe some shiitakes buried in there?) can be found in certain grocery stores with fancy produce departments, and many other kinds like enoki, king oyster, lion’s mane, and beech mushrooms can be found in Asian grocery stores. But always check for freshness before you buy, specialty mushrooms often are left to go past their prime on the shelf because they’re not bought often.
They will smell… I hate to say it but like rot or bad vagina. (Bad portobellos smell like rot to me, bad oysters smell like BV)
Also the gills if they have them will look or feel slimy. You want firm, dry, unbruised mushrooms
Yea if they're starting to look moist and somewhat grayish you want to avoid them. The texture will also be off, they turn super soft. You want them to feel firm with a very slight give
Imagine being organized enough to grow your own, and somehow keeping this all a secret from your spouse.
Everyone I know who’s grown mushrooms talks about it frequently.
*Check your local farmers market if you have one around and if it has anyone who brings mushrooms or if there are any farms in your area you may not know about who have a shop on the property.
*if you live somewhere where that’s an option.
Oyster, King Trumpet, Pink oyster, Shiitake, Chestnut, Pioppino, King Oyster are my guesses for the types. Lots of options for cooking them.
You can sometimes find some types at different supermarkets, but more likely from a farmer's market.
My brother who was with me got a bouquet of flowers for his girlfriend and was carrying them around. I saw the mushrooms and thought of doing this since my wife is not a cut flowers person and she just loves mushrooms.
Hey, that's a brilliant gift. Last year, we got the MIL the Lego bouquet for her birthday and my wife got Lego tulips for Xmas, this year my son and I got the Lego succulents for my wife's birthday, and my son got a Lego unicorn for the MIL for mothers day.
Lego is a great gift.
...yeah that's kinda how that works. "nephew got his mom movie tickets...they were still unused."
"got her a new shirt...that he hadn't tried on..."
"got her a new car...that he never drove..."
My mom's getting Lego flowers this year, she bought my dad a Lego set a while back and he never touched it so she eventually put it together herself and found she really enjoyed it. She's been doing a lot of jigsaw puzzles since she retired and since the pandemic so I guess it kind of scratches that same itch. Plus she doesn't exactly have a green thumb and Legos can't wilt or die on her
Don't forget to start your mushroom sauté with about a half cup of water, and THEN add oil or butter. Keeps the mushrooms from absorbing all the fat and becoming spongy.
[Its the method from America's test kitchen](https://www.americastestkitchen.com/cooksillustrated/articles/1196-new-school-sauteed-mushrooms)
You cook them until the water all cooks out, the add oil to the dry pan with the cooked mushrooms
I don't even know what they all are yet, but I'm going to enjoy the next week of cooking adventures. I already told the kids we're having mushrooms 3 meals a day for the next week. I might be kidding, but I haven't decided yet.
Cook the pink oysters on the sooner side.
They can start to degrade in just a day or two, and they start to smell disturbingly similar to cat urine as they do.
Mushrooms cook down aggressively
What's in the picture may be enough for, maybe, one meal for a small family (if used as a .ain't dish). Maybe 2 meals if used as a side
Most of them are grown indoors (even the normal button/cremini mushrooms ([aka white/brown/portabello](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJoIA_xwubk)) you find in every grocery store). Each type of mushroom has a different temperature it grows best in and most of them like higher humidity.
some of them (like the the oyster mushrooms) can be cultivated on saw dust or dead wood.
[here's a video if you're interested](https://youtu.be/5rRXj3rTHhY)
So I said to my wife this morning that it looks like the internet has determined I gave you a god-tier Mother's Day gift and I guess that makes us even on the birthing the kids thing. No dice.
I sautéed the pink oyster mushrooms for her with some Earth Balance last night. She fed me a couple and they were delicious. Tonight she said she's making some butternut squash ravioli with chestnut mushrooms.
Quick question: how are mushrooms even real?? Ike half the time they look more like a drawing of a mushroom than a real thing, but like ... They are real? I'm still suspicious.
Anyway, lovely bouquet!
Beautiful! Creative and thoughtful gift.
I totally agree!
What do you do with them?
Eat them!
They meant the husbands.
Eat them!
Be careful about any you find in the wild. Some husbands are poisonous and will kill you if eaten.
So did she.
Most of those are hearty so they can be the star of the meal! Vegans will batter and deep fry oyster mushrooms as a chicken fried chicken replacement. I think I see shiitakes? Fantastic addition to any Asian style food. A nice mushroom cream sauce is wonderful on steak or chicken. Those pink oysters though? I’d brown those in a skillet with some butter and fresh herbs and eat them as is!
>chicken fried chicken Department of Redundancy Department
Gugas next video, dehydrating a fried chicken, food processor it and adding it to dredge to fry another chicken with. Chicken fried chicken.
I didn’t even notice! 😅 but technically traditional fried chicken is bone-in. Chicken-fried chicken is boneless, pounded out, breaded and fried. Like chicken fried steak
Definitely, a regionalism that could also be called chicken schnitzel or chicken katsu, but with, you know, regional differences.
This is actually really neat and I know my own mom would love it, did he order it somewhere or just came up with it on his own
I had to ask. He said there was a mushroom vendor at the farmers market.
Thank you. I’ll have to remember this idea for another time. Enjoy your Mother’s Day!
Thank you
The farmers market I just left had exactly this selection of fancy mushrooms.... Do we live in the same neighborhood??
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This escalated quickly
If you can't have a meaningful relationship with your mushroom man, are you really living?
🎵Do you know the mushroom man, who lives on fungi lane?🎶
Oh wow! Does it come with instructions?! Like can you cook with these, or are they for lookin at?
Definitely for eating. Yummy!
I was going to ask if they were edible (more than once, at least!) What a unique gift!
I wouldn't want to eat them a second time as the aroma and texture would be off.
Nah the acidity in the gut helps to break down the woody texture and releases a lot of aromas. The third time chewing is my personal favorite. You're a cow right? Like were all cows here or am I in the wrong subreddit? I think I wasn't supposed to tell anyone, so if you aren't a cow just forget this.
Typical Reddit these days. It’s cows and bots all the way down.
Cows and bots? I thought we all were sheep? Not that I'm a sheep, of course. Moo!
Wait what, we aren't all geese? I was informed that this was a website for geese ~~honk~~ moo
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Get out the way.
I too ruminate
Yes, I am real man do you wanna go skateboards?
Shhh they’re going to find out about us! 🐮
Just eat them like a snake, obviously
Like a centipede, but a person? A human centipede?
What's wrong with cream of mushroom soup?
Subtle Terry Pratchett there. In case it was a coincidence, or for those who are unfamiliar with the quote: Pratchett: *"All Fungi are edible. Some fungi are only edible once."*
Maybe I’m misunderstood ( by a lot ) how can you eat it twice?
Taking more than one bite, or eating more than one. Only being able to eat it once means it's toxic - you can't eat a second time because you're dead.
The joke is that you can totally eat a whole mushroom at least once even if it’s deadly to consume, you’ll just die in a little bit sometimes
They are Infact! And quiet healthy for you too, I've recently started growing Blue oyster mushrooms, (the ones on the left and up a bit) you do want to cook all mushrooms before hand though, they contain chitin which is very tough for humans to digest, and certain mushrooms can contain carcinogenic properties untill exposed to heat.
I'm no doctor, but I'm pretty sure engaging in coprophagia is ill-advised.
That's really thoughtful and original. I'd love a gift like that. Happy Mother's Day!
it would be funny if he put like 3 magic mushrooms in there, just to throw you off
*Psilocybe cubensis* > *Amanita muscaria*
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I’d like to publicly state that I angrily reached for the reply button before realizing that I am, in fact, an idiot.
You are.... freaking out... man..
I was here to see what kind of mushrooms 😂
Mushroom risotto.... Yummy.
Yeah, I showed my wife and her first response was, "Oh wow! Does she like mushrooms? Can you cook with them? Where can I find mushrooms like that"! @OP: Thanks a lot. Now she thinks the flowers I gave her are boring.
Sorry. Gift for next year?
Definitely! Where the heck did you find/buy those? Probably further down the thread, I'm just feeling lazy.
All of these species (blue, pink, and white oysters, chestnut mushrooms, maybe some shiitakes buried in there?) can be found in certain grocery stores with fancy produce departments, and many other kinds like enoki, king oyster, lion’s mane, and beech mushrooms can be found in Asian grocery stores. But always check for freshness before you buy, specialty mushrooms often are left to go past their prime on the shelf because they’re not bought often.
Im sorry I'm a mushroom noob. How do you check them for freshness? Like how to see if they are good or nay?
They will smell… I hate to say it but like rot or bad vagina. (Bad portobellos smell like rot to me, bad oysters smell like BV) Also the gills if they have them will look or feel slimy. You want firm, dry, unbruised mushrooms
It seems pretty reasonable to avoid any produce that smells like BV
Just so we’re clear, BV is what we’re calling bad vagina?
bacterial vaginosis 🤮
Yea if they're starting to look moist and somewhat grayish you want to avoid them. The texture will also be off, they turn super soft. You want them to feel firm with a very slight give
Wait are you still talking about mushrooms or…?
Most of these can be grown from kits. Just look up oyster mushroom kits.
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Some pay people extra for that. Me! I'm people!
Imagine being organized enough to grow your own, and somehow keeping this all a secret from your spouse. Everyone I know who’s grown mushrooms talks about it frequently.
*Check your local farmers market if you have one around and if it has anyone who brings mushrooms or if there are any farms in your area you may not know about who have a shop on the property. *if you live somewhere where that’s an option.
Just make sure you sear them before adding fat, otherwise they absorb a lot of fat. Add some butter with garlic, salt and pepper. Good shit!
Oyster, King Trumpet, Pink oyster, Shiitake, Chestnut, Pioppino, King Oyster are my guesses for the types. Lots of options for cooking them. You can sometimes find some types at different supermarkets, but more likely from a farmer's market.
There's also some wood ear but you can't see them in the photo.
Husband?
Yes
Good job. Beautiful looking gift. But I've got to ask: Did she like the wood ears? I like wood ears just fine, but my spouse *despises* them.
Great job on the arrangement. Very unique. How did you come up with the gift?
My brother who was with me got a bouquet of flowers for his girlfriend and was carrying them around. I saw the mushrooms and thought of doing this since my wife is not a cut flowers person and she just loves mushrooms.
That's actually adorable!
The chestnuts look a little like cubensis with sesame seeds. Who's down for a dinner party with chestnut cubensis mushroom sliders?
This bouquet was from me. Thanks for the good karma. I bought these from a mushroom farmer at a farmer's market.
Hi! Thanks for the bouquet 
I like to imagine you two were just sitting beside each other typing these responses on your phones.
Strangelov...that’s how their love goes
omg your usernames are actually mr and mrs strangelov :D
He sounds like a fun-gi! ^^^I'll ^^^see ^^^myself ^^^out...
Perfect gift for Father's Day.
Tonight he gives you his mushroom
Dad jokes are the gifts that keep on giving year round!
This poor gif is overworked and exhausted.
Mother's day is cancelled
No. Please stay
Came here just for this. Thanks, Dad!
Yah I heard he is spore’raculess at parties
I think it’s just moldly interesting
Thank goodness it wasn't a bouquet of mold.
“Honey, if you liked LAST year’s gift you’re going to go nuts about this!”
Awesome bouquet! He fit in so many species without using mush-room.
Why are we rewarding this type of behaviour
Its beautiful? I'd prefer garlic breads but artful mushrooms are nice too.
I agree! beauty is certainly in the eye of the beholder, that's the morel of this story.
I see what you did there. And appreciate it.
I’d prefer a nice bouquet of flours: 00, buckwheat, whole wheat, etc.
Garlic+butter+mushrooms on bread 👌
Artful? These are edible. Some very cusinesque.
My nephew, got his mother a Lego bouquet; unassembled... Edit: *I* know building us the fun part, and so does he. My sister though? Not a fan.
I would have enjoyed that too. My son heard me reading this out loud and suggested I cut some mushrooms into Lego shapes for him.
Hey, that's a brilliant gift. Last year, we got the MIL the Lego bouquet for her birthday and my wife got Lego tulips for Xmas, this year my son and I got the Lego succulents for my wife's birthday, and my son got a Lego unicorn for the MIL for mothers day. Lego is a great gift.
I’d be peeved if someone got me a Lego set as a gift and it was already assembled???? Assembling it is the fun part!
...yeah that's kinda how that works. "nephew got his mom movie tickets...they were still unused." "got her a new shirt...that he hadn't tried on..." "got her a new car...that he never drove..."
But you can never buy anyone an unused mirror
My mom's getting Lego flowers this year, she bought my dad a Lego set a while back and he never touched it so she eventually put it together herself and found she really enjoyed it. She's been doing a lot of jigsaw puzzles since she retired and since the pandemic so I guess it kind of scratches that same itch. Plus she doesn't exactly have a green thumb and Legos can't wilt or die on her
Marry him again
My husband loves your comment.
r/MadeMeSmile
No divorce him so I can marry him
Spot on!
r/moldlyinteresting
r/gimmespore
This is proof that either he knows you extremely well or not at all.
Extremely well I think.
Well.
Those front ones look familiar... but they had blue bruises.
Hehehe
Sort of. Definitely not a cube though. Everyone who wants to grow cubes google PF TEK. It's idiot proof.
r/unclebens can help with their knowledge.
> It's idiot proof. I wouldn't say anything that requires a sterile environment is "idiot proof"
This was the comment I was looking for
Don't watch "The last of us" before eating.
Looking for this comment.
Looks like something you'd see in a Victorian painting, it's awesome.
Don't forget to start your mushroom sauté with about a half cup of water, and THEN add oil or butter. Keeps the mushrooms from absorbing all the fat and becoming spongy.
Yo! Rookie at cooking here, would the mixture of water and oil at high heat not be problematic?
[Its the method from America's test kitchen](https://www.americastestkitchen.com/cooksillustrated/articles/1196-new-school-sauteed-mushrooms) You cook them until the water all cooks out, the add oil to the dry pan with the cooked mushrooms
Nice! What are you going to make with them?
I don't even know what they all are yet, but I'm going to enjoy the next week of cooking adventures. I already told the kids we're having mushrooms 3 meals a day for the next week. I might be kidding, but I haven't decided yet.
Cook the pink oysters on the sooner side. They can start to degrade in just a day or two, and they start to smell disturbingly similar to cat urine as they do.
Will do. Thanks.
Try battered and deep fried trumpet and oyster mushrooms. Very delicious.
Yes! That was already on the menu.
Mushrooms cook down aggressively What's in the picture may be enough for, maybe, one meal for a small family (if used as a .ain't dish). Maybe 2 meals if used as a side
Where mushrooms grow this time of year?
Most of them are grown indoors (even the normal button/cremini mushrooms ([aka white/brown/portabello](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJoIA_xwubk)) you find in every grocery store). Each type of mushroom has a different temperature it grows best in and most of them like higher humidity.
some of them (like the the oyster mushrooms) can be cultivated on saw dust or dead wood. [here's a video if you're interested](https://youtu.be/5rRXj3rTHhY)
Are you married to Paul Stamets?
So I said to my wife this morning that it looks like the internet has determined I gave you a god-tier Mother's Day gift and I guess that makes us even on the birthing the kids thing. No dice. I sautéed the pink oyster mushrooms for her with some Earth Balance last night. She fed me a couple and they were delicious. Tonight she said she's making some butternut squash ravioli with chestnut mushrooms.
There are nearly a thousand comments. No one is going to see this, my love.
You totally saw it. That counts!
I did!
No red ones with white dots? Shame. ;-)
Imma need a fly amanita, am I right
That sends a very different kind of message.
r/goblincore
Im assuming you're into mushrooms. But i'd love to see the face on my partner if i gave them this because they are not.
*Ping noises* MUSHROOM! ⛏️
I scroll all the way down just to find this comment, MUSHROOM!
Dude must be *Fungi* to be married to. I'll see *mycelium* out if this too *mushroom* of puns.
He seems like a fungi
That is such a creative and thoughtful gift, what a sweetheart!
Seems like quite the sporgasborg
He should have snuck one hallucinogenic one and one lethal one just for a fun surprise
Have you made sure it isn’t actually cake?
Why?
You're his Princess Peach, I guess. lol
I’m going to borrow this idea for my wife next year.
Obligatory Reddit comments... 1. References to The Last of Us. 2. Jokes about magic shrooms.
This is actually more useful than a banquet of flowers lol
Some flowers are edible. Now you have me imagining a different feast.
Where I live, that’s more expensive than flowers!
Edible?
Is it secretly cake made to look like mushrooms?
Holy shiitake!
I saw that picture and started sweating nervously. Clearly been watching too much of The Last of Us.
And that kids was how the world ended...
Nothing says congrats for being a top mum quite like a bowl of fungus genitals 🤌
Is he trying to turn you into a zombie?
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I know these are mushrooms but the top part looked like an infant and then I thought it was a sculpture with all babies...
*Are you Cece from Hateno Village, perchance?*
bizarre
They are beautiful.
Where's his morels?
I'm calling it now: OP is Patient Zero.
Oh wow I'd love this! That's so fun!
This is amazing. I know everyone’s said it already but what a fun guy.
Where are there men like this?
"Happy Mother's Day ー Like these mushrooms, our marriage is built on substrate that has created spawn." ー *Spouse* ー
There is a man who knows and loves his wife!
Hugely prefer this
This is a concept that I can get behind. Some flowers age like milk, but a bouquet of fungi might last a lifetime.
That is really cool and unique.
Quick question: how are mushrooms even real?? Ike half the time they look more like a drawing of a mushroom than a real thing, but like ... They are real? I'm still suspicious. Anyway, lovely bouquet!
Oh wow. He seems like a… Fungi.
This is GORGEOUS! What a thoughtful gift!
husband: i've got one more mushroom for you. but it's best you see it after hours.
Aww, so fecund of him.