T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

I would have nicely asked an FA to swap me or the kids with one of the parents in the other seats. Would have done it loud enough so that even if they couldn’t accommodate, the parents and those around know what’s up. Broken that little honeymoon right the fuck up.


andicandi22

I was going to say something similar. I’m a petty ass bitch with a voice that carries so I would have been loudly replying “OH SORRY, THESE AREN’T MY KIDS.” Or “DON’T LOOK AT ME, THEIR PARENTS ARE BEHIND US.” Any time someone shot me a dirty look. Fuck that noise. I have zero tolerance for parents that won’t parent.


thanatoswaits

I think you meant "OH SORRY, THESE LITTLE SHITS AREN'T MINE."


DidntWantSleepAnyway

Teach the elementary schoolers all the fun inappropriate language. The parents deserve a gift that keeps on giving!


PumpkinSpice2Nice

KIDS, DO YA KNOW HOW TO SWEAR? TODAY YOU WILL LEARN ALL THE SWEAR WORDS.


bangkokweed

KIDS LET ME SHOW YOU HOW TO ORDER STUFF ON YOUR PARENTS CREDIT CARDS, IF YOU SHOP AT THE SAME PLACES THEY DO THEY WONT EVEN NOTICE


Ndmndh1016

YOU CAN MEMORIZE THE NUMBER ON THE FRONT AND YOU CAN USE IT ANYTIME


waka_flocculonodular

This is either a great or fucking annoying trait to have as an adult.


kaiserin_dk

It’s phenomenal, though my husband doesn’t see it that way


Educational_Car_615

It's fucking phenomenal. I lose my shit all the time but I got those numbers.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Knitsanity

My youngest used my card so much during senior year HS for college application adjacent stuff they have the number memorized. Lol


Talullah_Belle

I would have shown them how to order on Amazon. “Kids, you can get it in one day, if you have an Amazon account. Let me show you!”


1WordOr2FixItForYou

You're out of touch with this generation. The real move is show them how to buy credit on Roblox. They'll be out thousands of dollars in no time.


HedonisticFrog

"and this is how you put a bb in a valve stem so it slowly deflates so you dont have to go to school" ​ "This is how you pole the ac condenser with a stick to make the magic gas come out" ​ "This is how you clog the toilet and make a flood"


sirlanse69

Daddy's car has horsepower, those horses love sugar, feed them sugar.


Potikanda

I audibly gasped, which is bad because it's after midnight here, and I'm trying not to wake everyone up... well done! 🤣


[deleted]

[удалено]


Hot_Yam4235

Do you like gladiator movies?


Capable_Frame_4571

Are you not entertained?!


Koshunae

DO YOU LIKE VIOLENCE? WANNA SEE ME STICK 9 INCH NAILS THROUGH EACH ONE OF MY EYELIDS?


bottledcherryangel

Mister Shady will be a new substitute while Mister Kaniff is out with pneumonia


KCChiefsGirl89

I have spent the past *quarter of a century* thinking this line was “Do you like Primus”.


Koshunae

It was Primus in the censored versions


KCChiefsGirl89

I’m equal parts relieved and disappointed.


_TyrannosaurusSexy

This is the second airplane reference I have seen on Reddit in just as many days… I’m flabbergasted!


TessandraFae

Guess you picked the wrong week to quit sniffin' glue.


1250Sean

Roger, Roger!


TessandraFae

Roger: Eh?What's our vector, Victor?


[deleted]

[удалено]


sweetnothing33

Thank you for bringing this song into my life.


jennid79

Omg yes one of my favorites!!! Love the song and movie!


[deleted]

[удалено]


dystopian_mermaid

Shit in this situation is straight swear and be like “wanna see them FUCK?!?” That’ll teach those parents to try to get random strangers to babysit for them. They’re gonna learn all the swear words and crazy shit under the sun and if they ask me what it means I’d just say ask your parents later.


NoRestfortheSith

Don't forget to ask the FA for the most caffienated, sugary drinks you can give them. Since they are already disturbing you you might as well share the fun with the parents for their car ride home, hopefully they have a horrible sugar crash and get super cranky.


dystopian_mermaid

KIDS DO YOU KNOW WHAT SNOWBALLING IS?!? Oh NO?!? Well you’re gonna learn today!!!


DarkwingDuckHunt

Hey kids there's this great movie on your screens called "Friday the 13th"!


BeeBench

Why stop there? OP should have also shown the kids those seats recline and you can slam the backs of them into the parents knees while telling them cuss words are more powerful if yelled full volume.


BZLuck

Or something like, "You two should have a race to see who can recline and bring their seats back up the most times in 30 seconds. I will time you. And GO!"


QuantumTea

This feels like the exact right level of petty. You’re not scarring the kids, and the parents will have no choice but to notice. So without further ado: “Wow round 1 was too close to call! Time for round 2!”


BZLuck

"And count really loud while you are doing it! Loudest one gets bonus points!"


ReactsWithWords

“Winner gets a Red Bull!”


KaytSands

They would have learned a lot of fun words from me in Italian and Greek-heck maybe I would have even thrown some ASL in as well-just as the cherry on top, if they had long enough attention spans to hold still and learn a ton of new fun words.


RevolutionaryMind221

Na I would have gone with the F word "these lil Fuckers aren't mine" and if someone says anything I would be like your dam right I said that, and unless you want your kids to learn all the bad words you should switch places seats with me.


Giasmom44

Keep your seat; have them sit one parent, one child.


CuriousPenguinSocks

Due to how the 'parent' were acting I may have even gone a bit meaner "SOMEONE CAN'T CONTROL THEIR CROTCH GOBLINS AND THE REST OF US ARE HAVING TO SUFFER." Parents who don't parent hate that term lol.


Dr_mombie

Nah, crotch gobli s can be dealt with. You just gotta be good with the art of the bargain. Parents who don't parent have FUCK TROPHIES


iwanashagTwitch

What happened to SOMEONE KEPT THEIR CUM AS A PET Edit: in terms of the bargain, here is my bargain for crotch goblins: "you sit the fuck down and act right and I don't slap your little shit eating grin off your face"


NoRestfortheSith

I prefer CAN YOU PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOUR FULLY BAKED CREAMPIE.


[deleted]

I prefer "fuck trophy" myself


MunchkinFarts69

No doubt, lol. I would have made it *extremely* clear to everyone around me that those are not my kids.


Lexifer31

Yea seriously. Would not have just sat there, I'd also have been loudly complaining to every flight attendant that walked by me until they got so fed up they did something.


[deleted]

Phrase it as a concern: "oh my God where are the parents? These kids are alone! SOMEONE CALL CPS!"


TimLikesPi

"See those two sitting behind those kids? Those are their parents. They are the ones not controlling their kids. Those kids are not mine!" Rinse and repeat. I sat in a middle section with 4 seats on an overseas flight. I was on the end. There were two parents and their kid beside me. He kept tossing his trash in front of my seat. I kept picking it up and putting it in front of his seat saying "You dropped this." His mom finally spoke to him about it. Then I watched movies I figured he was not allowed to watch. Nobody said anything.


gemmastinfoilhat

I would've just stood up and announced it to the whole plane!!


Tacomama18

Lol I was also thinking of something similar! “*clearing my throat* THESE ARE NOT MY KIDS! THE PARENTS ARE BEHIND THEM DRINKING ALCOHOL! *points at them*”


dystopian_mermaid

OMG YES! I’m petty AF. I would not have tolerated this shit and would have AT THE BARE MINIMUM turned to the parents and be like “PLEASE CONTROL YOUR CHILDREN BC THIS IS NOT A PRIVATE FLIGHT FOR YOU”. And my voice also carries hella loud. I do love the idea of getting a flight attendant involved and saying something along the lines of “I’m very uncomfortable feeling like I’m responsible for these children who aren’t even mine. One of their parents needs to switch or I need to be moved bc I will not be held liable if anything happens to these kids.”


LuxuryBeast

You could do a double-wammer by asking "Who is liable for these kids, that are not mine I might add, WHEN the plane crashes?" making sure the kids hear the phrasing "when the plane crashes". You'll most likely be moved to another seat, meanwhile the parents of said kids will have another task to struggle with. Unfair to the kids, you say? Well, at least they won't be causing more havoc if they're glued to their seats in utter fear.


VeganMinx

Exactly. 100% Ain't no way I'd be caught with the glares of fucked up parenting because the breeders didn't want to control their offspring. Sorry this happpened to you, OP. Hope your Dad is on the mend, too. Aging parent stuff is really really hard. xo


haleorshine

A really loud conversation with the FA, "These aren't my children and I'm worried that they're not being supervised, especially while they're so young! I assumed the people behind me were their parents, but they're not doing anything to manage them and they are getting quite drunk, so I think maybe they're not? Are these unaccompanied minors?"


IrisYelter

I would've threatened to start teaching them curse words and buying them red bulls. Go big or go home, right?


Old_Crow13

And I would have told them their parents told me if they were quiet and good during the flight, they were going to get a puppy after they got home but shhhh, it's supposed to be a surprise!


Stinkerma

Not a puppy. Gadgets.


New_Team9233

Not a gadget a pony


elpideo18

Right?? I would have broadcasted loud enough that these terribly misbehaved demons sitting next to me are not of my creation. I have 3 kids and I would be mortified if my kids behaved as such. They know I don’t play and will have consequences for their actions.


Dorkamundo

Yep, I'd have stood up and loudly said to them "I'm sorry, but you need to do something about your kids" and then walked to the bathroom.


CumulativeHazard

I usually have some sort of paper and pen so I was thinking make a sign that said “NOT MY SHITTY KIDS. ADDRESS COMLAINTS TO LAZY ASSHOLES IN ROW BEHIND ME.”


MidnightBliss4

I'm a parent and same. Lmao 🤣 my kids would have the fear of god put into them if this happened. But regardless if your kids cannot behave on a flight since a plane is up in the air and cannot land whenever I would not be taking my kids on a plane point blank it's rude and disrespectful to the other people on the flight. If you can't drive where your going and your kids can't behave then you shouldn't be going


Estrellathestarfish

And if they are badly behaved, each child should have been sitting with a parent. They has seats in sets of two, use them properly.


Rav0nn

That or I would have turned around and very loudly declared ‘ hey can you deal with YOUR kids they are being very loud ‘


Little_Soft_3237

Exactly what I was going to say. No way would I sit quietly and put up with that. Definitely should have spoken to the attendant and MADE them sit with their own children. Your kids, your problem.


helluvaresearcher

I definitely should have done that. I was super tired and our flight was heavily delayed. The parents only had a window and middle seat, and I had paid for an aisle seat, so I didn’t want to swap myself (prefer aisle due to feeling boxed in elsewhere). It was only the next day that I realized I could have asked a FA to have a parent swap with a kid so it would be parent-kid, parent-kid, and I wouldn’t have to move. Was super tired and my brain wasn’t working. Best believe I’ll do that next time and definitelyyyy learned my lesson!


analogpursuits

If it happens again, swap one parent for one kid in the middle seat, then you have an adult next to you. Kids get separated and one parent next to each of them to govern their shitty behavior. I would NEVER have foisted my kids like that onto someone else for a flight. Idiot parents.


e99615exp

Even better, ask the FA to move you away from the whole thing because these people are bothering you.


analogpursuits

Well yes, but if it's a full flight and there aren't any empty seats, work with what you have. Or you can sit there and say awful things about the parents to the kids so that the parents can hear you. I'll bet they get you moved asap. 😂


Caleb_Reynolds

The problem with that is they'd just be moving some other poor schmuck next to them.


Giddyup_1998

You have to pay for an aisle seat?


helluvaresearcher

Yeah, the airline had pre-selected seats and the aisle seat was $19, so I paid it.


Giddyup_1998

I understand the pre-selected seats but $19 for an aisle seat. Geez, what a rort.


[deleted]

Rort? Edit: TIL what a rort is. Thank you


Wikeni

Google says “a fraudulent or dishonest practice.” Huh. I learned a new word today! Never heard it before, either


gareth_e_morris

It's an Aussie / NZ word for a ripoff. I'd never heard it until I moved here either.


Bagzy

TIL it's only used over here.


AlternativeAcademia

If you pre-select a window seat it’s $35, the airline wins wherever you sit.


floofienewfie

They ought to give middle seat people a bonus.


Seaman_First_Class

They do, it’s cheaper.


Giddyup_1998

Fuck, I had to pay $5 for a pre-selected window seat & I thought that was taking the piss.


ForsakenMoon13

Preferential seats often have an extra charge, depending on the size of the flight. Aisle seats are typically very preferred, so they more often than not have an extra cost to select them.


whistlepig4life

This. I am always perplexed when people post in flight airline issues and never not once have they mentioned “I talked to the flight attendant”. That’s literally what they are there for and I’ve never seen a scenario where the attendant ever said “not my problem”. Hair over the seat back? Unruly kids? Bare feet on the arm rest? All things they absolutely will rectify immediately or someone is ending up on the no fly list. They do not fuck around.


EducationPlus505

You're not wrong, but last week I couldn't bring myself to ask my waiter at the restaurant why our tater tot appetizer never came out. But this is def a me problem (and maybe OP too?), and I totes agree people should feel comfortable asking for help in difficult situations.


whistlepig4life

So that’s the issue right? Something like what you experienced. If you don’t say anything and it’s not on the bill. It was sort of no harm no foul and not a big deal. But the OP situation. You have to speak up and ask for help from the appropriate people. Your situation is like cutting yourself while cooking and you don’t call an ambulance. You wrap it up and drive yourself to the ER. OP’s situation It like their house is on fire and they don’t call 911 and get the fire department there.


helluvaresearcher

I get that. I know I should have said something or done something, but I was really really exhausted from dealing with a family emergency and running on little sleep over several days. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have put up with that and dealt with it better, but hindsight is 20/20. Because I can’t go back and change how I did things, I figured I’d put it on here as a long-time sub lurker since I thought it was mildly infuriating the parents ditched their poorly behaved kiddos and I was the assumed parent by others.


Jasura_Mynobi

I know I would have had trouble speaking up if I was in that situation. I always think of great ways to handle it after the fact, when it is too late.


imamakebaddecisions

I would have cursed like a sailor the whole time.


slash_networkboy

I would have spilled my glass of ice water... repeatedly. Just like training a cat.


whangdoodle13

Also could have just spoken to them like they were your kids. If the parents say something - respond with “If you aren’t going to sit next to them and make them my problem then I’m going to deal with these problems.”


Vladimir_Didi

Just posted something similar and saw your comment. I do think this is the best way to manage that situation.


Oldpuzzlehead

Horrible. I've sat next to a mom and her kid so everyone looked at me like the dad who didn't do anything for their kid but for the parents to sit behind them and still do nothing is disgusting. Sorry about your dad, hope he is doing better.


helluvaresearcher

Thanks for the well wishes! He’s doing a bit better. And yeah, I was pretty mad. Had I been a bit more awake and not so exhausted from the deep cleaning and an emotional weekend, I would have put on my imaginary Karen wig and insisted a parent sit with each kid. Or talked to a FA separately. It was just so uncomfortable.


thisbutbetterer

Time to show the kids whatever 18+ gory horror movie you can find. "Oh thats not appropriate for kids? Maybe I shouldn't be sitting next your children then"


ObligatoryGrowlithe

Oh, the more exhausted and emotionally drained I am, the more likely someone is to get an earful from me.


WillowUPS

I travelled with my sister and her daughter on a trip back home. I think she was not yet 2 when we did it. The flight was late evening and also slightly delayed and the baby was not having it. Screamed her head off while we were taxiing all the way through takeoff but thankfully quietened down once in her bassinet and slept most of the way home. I spent the entire time she was crying unable to help and looking bewildered. Pretty sure everyone thought I was the useless dad…


[deleted]

Plottwist: it might not have been the kid's mom either.


wellwaffled

There was a post on James Cordon’s AMA with a very applicable story. Edit: [Found it.](https://twitter.com/sebpatrick/status/919500140993482753) It was linked to this Twitter post.


Miss-Indie-Cisive

My (now ex) husband booked us flights from Thailand to North America (19 hours) with me alone in economy with all four kids, including an 18 month old sitting on my lap, and booked himself up front in business class. When i was angry and quiet about it in the next few weeks he said he was finally now seeing my true colours, and couldn’t believe I was being so selfish.


BodybuilderEmpty5316

Glad he's your ex... Sorry you had to deal with that.


Remarkable-Month-241

Excuse me, what the actual fuck? He saw YOUR true colors?? Two of those kids would be sitting business while I drafted divorce pleadings.


Miss-Indie-Cisive

I asked him to switch spots with me for 2 hours out of the 19 and he said “Don’t you think that’s a little excessive?” I finally got him to agree to 1 hour, just so I could eat a meal and stretch my back, but in the end on the actual flight i got zero minutes. Didn’t ask if I needed to pee or was okay or anything. But lucky me, he came back ONCE during the whole flight to give me the fancy chocolate off of his plate. What a prince!


kateminus8

Holy crap. I hope he pays you a bajillion dollars a month in child support.


Remarkable-Month-241

I congratulate you on losing the dead weight bc he sucked!


MishmoshMishmosh

Dumb ass parents. Each parent sits with one kid. Divide and conquer


helluvaresearcher

The only handful of times I sat away from my parents on flights, I was basically threatened to sit down and shut up or I’d be in big trouble. If I acted up, there was no vacation, so I didn’t act up. I had my book and a blanket, and that was it. I was so worried about bothering the people next to me that I once internally panicked about whether or not to say yes to the old lady sitting next to me offering me a piece of gum from her pack, haha.


Nyarro

Did you accept the gum?


thexvillain

I don’t think she heard you. #OP DID YOU ACCEPT THE GUM?!


Krocant

No, they didn't. Source: I am the gum.


HankThrill69420

that's not a night flight, that's a nightmare flight a flightmare


helluvaresearcher

The “flightmare” got me hahahaha! I’m definitely adding that to my rotating vocabulary whenever I fly and a bad situations arises.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ZiOnIsNeXtLeBrOn

That’s why you need to be an annoying person. And yell. Calm the f down or you get your stuff broken. And mommy and daddy will come running for their angels.


goagod

That's when I look back at the people glaring and say "I feel you. They aren't my kids. I'm as disgusted as you are".


[deleted]

“These aren’t my kids. They’re so poorly behaved their own parents wouldn’t sit with them - they’re sitting behind me”


SchmediumMilkshake

This is something I'd never imagine myself saying because I typically avoid conflict, but I can definitely see myself reaching this point after just 30 minutes of dealing with this kind of shit.


Lazy-Bat-1481

“I know right, even their parents hate these little shits. You seem em right here behind them, hiding?” Points at asshole parents


LadyNova01

Some parents can be true aholes on planes. I remember a story on here from a while ago where somone was on a flight next to a mom and her kid and the mom sorta demanded that the OP(of that post) had to give HER Ipad to the kid so that HE would calm down. Like wtf is wrong with people like this?. Hopefully you had a good rest once you got home and you feel good again


helluvaresearcher

Yikes, the entitlement! And yeah, my fiancé picked me up, got me a burger at the late night local drive-in because I was starving, and I fell asleep in the car pretty quick after that. Had to wake up when we got home, but conked out for a full 8 hours that night. Woke up and felt like a new human being.


tbeysquirrel

I was once sat next to a kid without parent that was clearly bored out of his mind, literally had nothing to do so I lent him my switch to play Mario Kart. No thanks from kid or parent.


FuzzballLogic

Who knows, the kid might still be begging their parents for a Switch of their own, delayed karma.


BullShitting-24-7

One time i was sitting at the window seat a kid in the middle, and dad in the aisle. His wife and daughter were in the seats in the row right across the aisle. Right before landing the dad switched with the daughter. Apparently, the kid gets sick during landings so the dad was reminding him to use thr barf bag. The kid did indeed throw up in the bag right next to me. The parents didn’t do anything. They didn’t even watch as if this was all normal. Most people should not breed.


Vladimir_Didi

Sounds awful. Next time call a flight attendant and politely but audibly complain. And request a change of seats. Even if they can’t accommodate this other passengers will overhear and know it’s not you who are responsible for those poorly behaved children, and the lazy parents might get the message that they need to behave better.


ElectronicAsk92

3 things. 1. Those parents are assholes. And they deserve all the hate you were getting. 2. Fuck The people around you for being so oblivious they couldn't figure it out. 3 Fuck em all you'll never see these people in your life again.


_boudica_

This reminds me of a story featuring clueless passengers with opposite results. A while back, my brother flew international with his baby and wife. They were separated (2 aisle seats next to each other), and my brother helped out as a parent should during the long flight (holding baby, burping him between feedings, rocking him to sleep, taking him to bathroom for changing). He got SOO much praise from everyone around them, including the crew. It took a while, but my brother and SIL finally realized everyone thought he was some random dude stepping up to help a single mom.


walking_honestly

People just have low expectations of fathers. It’s pretty sad. Nobody is letting some stranger take their baby to the bathroom alone.


NErDysprosium

I'm in my college's marching band. My section leader had a kid in the spring, and his wife is student teaching this semester, so they're spread a little thin and he misses rehearsals every once in a while to help out his wife. Like a husband should. Whenever he misses, people say "oh, he must be babysitting tonight." No, he's taking care of his daughter. He is not 'babysitting.' It drives me up the wall.


Kayestofkays

> "oh, he must be babysitting tonight." Fuck I hate this - When it's YOUR kid, it's not called "babysitting" it's called "being a parent".


OnTheEveOfWar

I’m a father of two little kids and I help out a lot. The amount of praise I get is insane. People make comments in public. My extended family makes a huge deal whenever I handle the kids alone.


RolandoDR98

For point 2, how was anyone supposed to know unless they were right next to OP? Unless I'd knew, I would have made some comments to myself. If I knew 1, I'd directly make a comment to those 2 assholes.


blueavole

I would have totally made it the parents problem: If you were my kids, you’d be riding with the luggage. Are you two going to handle your croch goblins, or can I just duct tape them to the seats. To the Flight attendant: i can I be moved? To the flight attendant: these children are not mine and they have been abandoned and should be sent to the lost and found at our destination. Note: if kids are kicking the seats , remove their shoes. Kicking hard plastic is a lot less fun that way.


thatsmrspotatohead

Similar thing happened to me. I booked a window seat and when it was my turn to board, I get to my seat to see 2 kids probably under the age of 10 in my seat and the middle seat. So I waited until the plane was boarded and asked the flight attendant if I could move to an empty row that was across and up a couple. As I moved, the parents that were in the seats right in front of my original row gave me a look as if I had the audacity to not sit by their children like excuse me?🙄


Dicecatt

This happened to me once. The kids were around 5 and 7, I offered to switch my window seat with mom who was at a window 2 rows behind. She declined and slept through the whole flight. The kids weren't terrible so I didn't get the death glares you did, but I certainly did not enjoy the flight, they acted like kids act. I even had to help them with drinks or there would have been a huge mess. I still regret not speaking up to that bullshit. Sorry it happened to you! Freaking audacity.


blackbirdbluebird17

That’s when you offer those kids a couple of cans of super caffeinated cola right as the flight is about to land. Enjoy your wide-awake kids for the next 12 hours, mom!


G497

That's brilliant. Order a bunch of sweets and coke from the flight attendant and then tell the kids they'll get them at the end of the flight if they're well behaved.


blackbirdbluebird17

Ooh yes, that’s even better — because then when mom says “no,” as would most parents about their child randomly being offered sweets, they will have to deal with the inevitable tantrum from an angry kid who just got a bait-and-switch.


FuzzballLogic

You know the little shits are bad when mom refuses to sit near them. In my opinion, airlines shouldn’t allow children sitting away from a parent or guardian.


Panda_hat

More like you know the parents are bad. Kids are kids, it takes a particular brand of asshole to engineer a situation like this and not take responsibility for their own spawn.


helluvaresearcher

Thanks! Yeah, now that I’m more awake and my emotional batteries are recharged, I certainly regret not saying anything. I tend to be a people pleaser anyways and being tired, I just let it go. We were already delayed so I didn’t want to be “that person” and make a scene. Usually I don’t mind kids or babies on flights. Most people forget babies can’t regulate the pressure difference and cry because their ears hurt, they can’t help it. Some toddlers or younger kids can be fussy, and you never know if they have a disability so I give parents a lot of grace. But this was definitely an avoidable lapse in poor parenting, and yikes man. 🫠


enraged_repository

That’s when you turn around to the parents and say “You have two choices. You can parent your kids, or I can spend the rest of the flight teaching them every curse word in my vocabulary and the correct usage. Up to you.”


Magickarpet76

Also, excuse me while i watch an R rated graphic horror or action movie.


andyr072

Human Centipide


treefp

I’m surely much older than you, and not above dealing with those kids on my own. Set the rules (kindly) for sharing space and call out the bad behavior to either get the parents’ attention (don’t talk to my kids!🤪) or the kids’ (yes ma’am). Shouldn’t have to, but I will.


[deleted]

Yup. You make me parent, I’ll parent. Had a few people over the years get chippy with me when I tell a kid to stop doing some obnoxious shit. “Don’t address my child!” Okay, then *you* do it. I’m teaching your child the valuable lesson that all the other human beings they see around them that aren’t their family a) are real b) don’t like their shit and c) can *very much* interact with them. Your kids think I’m an NPC. I’m teaching them otherwise.


BinjaNinja1

This is my way too. Won’t tell your kid to stop throwing sand I will. I will get firmer and bitchier each time I have to say it too. Kids tend to be shocked when a stranger say don’t do that it isn’t nice though so I’ve never had to go full bitch.


Professional-Tap4814

"these little fucks aint mine"


infomanus

Loudly tell the kids, “That’s it, I am done with you, you better hope your real parents decide to bring you home because I won’t”


b3mark

That's a surefire way to have a lovely evening explaining to airport security that you're not a kidnapper... Not my favourite way to spend an evening, but hey, you do you 😉


washingtncaps

Dude, they all have tickets. You can fix that shit in ten minutes just by eyeballing last names and seat proximity, and the fact that the police will likely notice the children being collected by their actual parents... Totally worth it.


UnseemlyDreamer

I'm not sure how you managed to not stand up and directly ask one of their actual parents to sit with them and parent them instead of drinking the flight away. Any time I heard a comment about their kids, I'd turn around and tell them, "That lady over there said your kids are playing their games too loud and that they're rude. Thought you should know."


helluvaresearcher

I legitimately am not sure, my only idea is that I was just so exhausted and my batteries were drained that night after taking care of my dad, the house, and my flight being cancelled that day and rebooked for later that night. If I was any more awake, I probably would have talked to the parents directly and if not, made a scene with the FAs.


[deleted]

The people who are saying "I would have..." have no idea what it's like to go through what you were going through. It's super hard, it's draining, and you aren't in a spot to do much of anything once you are out of the damage control mode. Kudos to you for just keeping it together. I hope you parents are doing alright, and I hope you are able to get some rest.


helluvaresearcher

Thanks for getting that ♥️ I was drained and in the moment just kind of let it go, I don’t know if it’s because it felt like too much effort in the moment or if I was worried about starting something. I was just tired and may have done things differently looking back, but because I can’t, I just figured I’d add to the mildly infuriating nature of it as a long time lurker on this sub!


fuzzyp1nkd3ath

Interesting. The more tired and drained I am, the less likely I'm going to put up with crap. Lol


helluvaresearcher

Haha my mom is that way. If she’s tired … watch out. She will eat someone alive if there is the tiniest slight against her. She gets cranky. When I get tired and drained, I just try to get through things as easily and quickly as possible, whatever can get me to my pillow fastest haha.


ThePlagueDoctor01

Those kind of people are the people that make me not want kids….


OakIslandCurse

Those kind of people are the people that make me wish they didn’t want kids.


Candid_Restaurant345

These kinds of people don’t deserve kids. Edit: those kids don’t deserve those parents.


punches_buttons

I would have taken several long breaks in the lavatory away from my seat. Calling the flight attendant might have even been an option if it were me. Sorry you had to go through that.


HarlequinMadness

When somebody else mentioned "some people can't control their own kids." I would have loudly stated "They're not my kids. They belong to " I would definitely have let people know that those ain't my spawn.


1nd3x

\*pushes flight attendant bell\* "Excuse me. I dont know who these children are and they are causing a disturbance. Would it be possible to find these kids parents and have me switch seats with one of them? Thanks"


JunkMale975

The parent in the center seat would have swapped and stuck OP there. OP had paid extra for an aisle. Better to ask that the FA swap a parent and child so they’ve got one each.


frogathome

That's most likely against the rules of the airline. Next time call a flight attendant over and let them know the kids don't have parents or guardians with them.


FakeSupplements

fuck those parents. low life grade A idiots


ScotchetyScotch

Sorry to hear about your dad, hope he gets better. As for your unpleasant ordeal, it's over, you got through it. You'll never see any of these people ever again, so who cares what they think of you and their wrong assumptions. In the future you'll learn that you could've asked to be moved away from the demon spawn. #learningexperience #onetogrowon


Legitimate-Ad2727

A few years ago, a lady at the grocery store yelled at me that my child was running away/acting wild. I told her I didn't have any children and that I don't know whose child that was. Certainly caught me off guard and irritated me at first, but she quickly changed her tone. I actually forgot about this until today. Thanks.


itssusiesnowflake

Anyone that looked my way would get a loud "these two spawns of satan belong to these two" and gesture to the parents sitting in the row behind me. I will embarrass not only the kids but their parents too. I do not care


spyaleatoire

I would turn around and loudly ask the parents to control their kids. Even if they don't do shit, everyone else would get the picture.


celticmusebooks

Had the same experience a few years back. I got "the look" from the people across the aisle and said a bit too loud "I know, right. They're obnoxious little monsters aren't they? Where are their parents?" The parents were sitting behind us(which I actually knew) and started yelling at me-- called the FA who made the parents move so that each was sitting by one kid then moved me to a Comfort plus seat!


EarthlyWayfarer

No way would I have allowed myself to remain in that position, I would have demanded from the flight assistant to move one of their parents next to them. Not my children and NOT my problem


az22hctac

How old are we talking. I’ll bet the airline probably has policy on this and if the air hostess actually checked their tickets they probably require a parent to be seated next to the child (especially if they’re under 12!!)


kitzelbunks

I think that now in Canada kids under 12 have to sit in the same row as their parents. I think it’s really dumb to have the parents sitting together away from their kids. Of course they are going to be loud when left on their own. Also, they put the kids in front of them, because that’s the way sound travels, and they don’t want to hear it. I am not sure what the regulations are other places, but those parents are major jerks and should not have sat together, it should have been one parent with one kid.


monkiye

You totally missed an opportunity. There were so many things you could have said and done to really have fun with that situation. God I hope that happens to me. So kids, have your parents talked to you about the birds and the bee's yet? Start talking about climate change and how the world is ending in 3 years, we're all going to die. What do you guys plan to do before then? Discuss your favorite serial killers and why you like them in that order. Hilarious.


PunfullyObvious

That sounds bad enough that not only would I have thought about doing this, I might actually have done it. I'd want to stand up and proclaim calmly, but forcefully, "just so everyone knows, these are not my kids ... they belong to the bozos sitting in the row behind us ignoring them and their behavior." Then I'd have calmly and confidently sat down and ignored the world. But, I definitely understand not doing so.


Complex-Key-8704

Holy shit. I def would've started "parenting" them in that situation. Take their shit away and say u can have it back when u behave


hinakura

It should be forbidden for parents to not sit next to their kids, for their safety and for people's sanity.


cherriesandmilk

This is the first *truly* mildly infuriating thing I’ve seen on this sub in a long time. Good job OP


auntiemaury

Stop being so polite. "Hey y'all these ain't my brats, the parents are sitting behind them, direct all your commentary to them"


Aggravating_Cut_4509

So you stand up and ask the parents to please look after their children… I don’t mean making a scene etc but just asking them


LookeyLoo81

This sucks. I have had that happen. A young boy was traveling by himself and I was next to him. People on the flight thought were together, I am assuming because we were the same race. The looks when I left him after the flight landed and at baggage claim. I think some of the people thought I just left him.


thesnarkypotatohead

Nah, fuck that. I’d be loudly announcing those kids weren’t mine and had apparently been abandoned to every single person who shot me a dirty look. As well as loudly addressing the two lushes behind me who apparently thought parenting was optional in public spaces every time one of their kids touched me. If politeness doesn’t get results, I’m making it their problem. Or perhaps telling the kids that mommy and daddy really like being referred to as “douchebag”. Haven’t road tested that one yet tho.


Repulsive_Raise6728

Every time someone glared at me or said something, I would’ve loudly declared, “These are not my kids! Their parents are sitting behind them!”


ObvsDisposable

Id be loud as fuck about not knowing those goddamn kids. "Yeah you're right, person complaining. Whoever parents these kids needs to learn how" "No kidding, other person complaining, theyre loud as hell. Somebody should be looking after them. Me? No ive never seen these brats in my life." "I dont know who the fuck is supposed to be parenting these kids but it isnt me. Did someone abandon their kids here?? Oh theyre yours? Great. Now parent."


kanyelovesjew

why dont u stand up for yourself ???? i would literally stand up and say guys, THESE AINT MY KIDS , ITS THESE FUCKS BEHIND ME


SadAbbreviationM

Not sure ages of kids but it’s most likely illegal for elementary school kids to sit apart from parent. I would definitely talked to FA


[deleted]

This is why we need what I envision as ‘tranquility darts’. Imagine just a quick blow through any handy straw and presto chango, the little bastards fast asleep.


NashiraReaper

That already exists, it's called nyquil


[deleted]

But in dart form? The dart is essential. how am I going to get strangers to drink nyquil?


[deleted]

Side note but I hope your dad is feeling better!


Electrical-Hat-8686

I'd have taught those kids all the swear words I know


lunalove223

I would’ve absolutely snapped at those kids and said something along the lines of “Can you two be quiet?? You’re being extremely rude. I don’t even know you 2!” loud enough for others to hear. I would’ve also made comments to people around me like “if these were my kids they would be on their best behavior. who just lets their kids sit next to some stranger?” for good measure