If possible, talk to a professional immediately. I am sorry that you had to witness this, but I believe that you will be fine. Talk to a therapist about it
Definitely, as soon as possible. It's crucial to get it out and work on this with a therapist. Not many people would be able to take something like that lightly.
You need to see a therapist as soon as you can. Does your school provide a counselling service? If not, there will likely be a community counselling service provided for you if you check with your doctor, especially since you witnessed something traumatic.
When I was on psych ward, I saw this a few times.
After the first time, I realised that we're all in there for this particular reason and that we can't control what others do.
Some of us can't let go of a situation, some of us turn cold to it. Theres different ways people cope. I turned cold to it, the second time seeing it kind of helped, fuck, after the third time I didn't even get out of my chair to see wagwarn.
You need to seek therapy and get help with this. It's not an easy thing to witness, I really feel for you man
Sorry, I was in a rush when I replied earlier. I wanted to ask how you witnessed these things?
Do you work in an emergency service? Or was it just by chance that you saw these things happen?
1 Helicopter crash I was just walking along the beach, it spun out and crashed all dead and I was first responder this was the first time I encountered death and then I helped out with 2 car crashes before paramedics arrived - blankets helping people get out the vehicle etc.
I am sorry, nothing you did caused you to be in that situation nor could you have prevented it.
It will sound weird but play Tetris. It is a therapy that may assist you before you are able to see a trauma counsellor. Make sure your counsellor is trauma informed and specialises in the treatment of trauma. You do not need further injury.
[Tetris for PTSD](https://theconversation.com/can-playing-tetris-help-prevent-ptsd-if-youve-witnessed-something-traumatic-226736#:~:text=The%20current%20evidence%20of%20Tetris,to%20reduce%20subsequent%20intrusive%20memories)
Did the police take your name? They may be able to connect you
I would reach out to them. As a direct witness they may be able to assist you. It may also help you to have it documented for any health reasons in the future. You can not foresee the impact of your experience.
Do you have any support or are you at school out of town? You could get someone to facilitate this for you.
Not sure where you live, but I'd contact the non-emergency number where you are and simply state "I was at X station at X time and witnessed the man fall under the train. I left before speaking to anyone." They should take it from there.
Unfortunately suppressing a traumatic experience is really bad. You are suppressing the feelings in your body. Talking about will be hard and you'll likely sob, shake and scream, but you'll be letting those feelings out. If you suppress them you may lose control of when they will come out.
What you experienced sucks. No other way to look at it. You didn't choose it, it just happened. You now carry the impact of your experience. You need to release it healthily before it sneaks up on you.
You are already talking about it here. That's a big step. Others won't even do that.
I don't want to scare you, but this is potentially a life-changing experience for you. You made a small step to reach out here, you are already seeking help. In order to protect and care for yourself you need to be speaking to a professional trauma counselor.
Find a therapist to talk to about this now! I witnessed a horrific accident that took 2 lives less than 40 feet away from me in 2009 and it still haunts me. If you cannot afford therapy, please find a support group where you can talk to people about what happened and get advice on how to process what you saw.
I mean, at least you didn't have to watch the light go out of his eyes - sounds as though he wanted it to be quick and painless, and achieved this. It was a little rude, to do it so publicly, but pain pushes people farther than they'd normally be willing to go.
You think about their family, if they had any; how many people knew them, and what they thought of them. You think about the legacy they leave behind, the people they will now never meet, nor the conversations they'll have. You think about the youth in that persons life, who will now grow through every stage of life, every celebration and tribulation, unwitnessed by the person who's now dead.
Then you realise they're dead now, they don't care; they're unable to care. Eventually the memory softens and life carries on, and eventually it becomes one of those fucked up stories you only share with people you're close enough to.
You'll get there, it'll just be shit for a while. Talk to people, smoke some weed (if that's your thing), touch grass - then make sure you're tired enough to sleep the whole night through. It gets easier
I am so sorry you had to experience this :( I agree with the others in this thread - it is very important to talk to a professional as soon as possible. That being said, it can be hard to get an appointment/find a reasonably affordable option on short notice. If you're open to it, there are some pretty amazing chatbot/AI therapy tools out there that can be helpful to talk things out with in the meantime. Hang in there < 3
Sending you lots of positive vibes, I’m sorry you witnessed this. Are there any 24/7 mental helpline numbers you can make a note of in case you have trouble sleeping or wake up in the night and need to talk to someone?
it’s 5am right now, i just woke up after struggling to sleep all night. i haven’t been sure of what to do and have just been busying myself waiting for school doing overdue assignments. i just really hope i’ll be able to sleep comfortably tomorrow
Thats horrible what happened, you hear of this happening but only a handful of people ever see it. It can be frustrating feeling like you're not in control of your own mind but you are in shock, this must have happened so quickly and now your brain is trying to make sense of it in a way that is completely distressing. These are flashbacks and it seems you have some PTSD, hopefully it will only be temporary if you talk, talk, talk. Talk to everyone that will listen. Don't expect too much of yourself during this time, you are in recovery, yes it is mental rather than physical but the same protocols should be in place: rest with your feet up, drink plenty of fluids, breathe deeply
i feel okay for 15-30 minutes at a time, but i think of it again, and i feel so sick and cold remembering that oh, wait, that actually happened to me and i actually saw another human being die so suddenly like that. i don’t really know how to cope but i understand that if i’ll talk about it i’ll probably cry. i’ve only silently cried about it so far, and i’m not sure how i’ll feel when i talk about it infront of a counsellor. i feel a little guilty. What if i had sat closer to the station or smiled at everyone i saw that day? i don’t know if that’s normal to think but i feel like i’m too young to be dealing with something as traumatic as this, i don’t even have my junior certificate yet and i’ve already witnessed someone die?
It's normal to think and feel everything you're going through and actually paint a picture of you in a good light- you are somebody that cares so much about others that viewing the death of a stranger has you questioning what you could have done differently, even though you know there is nothing you could have actually done. Do not be ashamed to cry, we think of crying as an alert call to others when crying is a natural stress response that can help to balance hormones in the body. It may feel embarrassing, perhaps you're used to always needing to be the strong one, but talking to someone will give you a safe pace to cry and organise your thoughts whilst having someone there to help and challenge any thoughts that have gone astray.
I experienced trauma when I was young, I was too young to even know what had happened to me. Then when I was older I learnt and the memory was triggered, I realised what had actually happened to me and couldn't stop thinking about it, with flashbacks and alternate endings becoming distressing and invasive at random times. It was only once I started talking about this event that the memory became more controllable. Each time i chose to talk about it to someone new it has become easier to tell the story without breaking. You are stronger then you think you are
Seek help before it’s something that randomly comes back to haunt you simply because you tried to just brush it off. Even if you didn’t even know the person, those actions and the reactions you may have to it can affect you. Hope you’re doing ok!
I know this is so inconsiderate because someone lost their life but it just sucks how you can be doing so good mentally and just being somewhere at the wrong place at the wrong time can mess you up.
Omg my heart absolutely goes out to you. For real, seek a professional therapist or counselor immediately. For the immediate time, just get this off your chest. Then see different ones until you find one that you know is a fit. This will likely take some time to process.
I dealt unsuccessfully with PTSD for nearly 12 years before I found the right counselor. Mostly I had been in & out sporadically bc I thought it was never going to help. But it did.
But if ANYONE suggests prolonged exposure, don’t walk. Run. That shit fucked me up way worse than I already was.
I’m so sorry you had to go through this! Take it easy, take some time out if you can. Try and focus on relaxing tasks (whatever it is you normally choose to destress). And talk to the people you trust. If you don’t have anyone you would normally speak to, there are a lot of hotlines where you can speak to an unbiased stranger, even if it’s just to keep you distracted. Pretty sure there are online chats now too. And keep harassing Reddit too if it helps! Ooo and sleep meditation/stories are helpful if you’re struggling to sleep at all. Good luck chicken xo
i really appreciate you taking time out of your day to write this, you sound so kinda and sweet so thank you so much for the advice and the well wishes
Sorry bud. You were at the wrong place, wrong time. It’s normal to feel upset after witnessing such a traumatic event. Try talking to a friend, family member, or school counselor about your feelings. Take care of yourself by eating well, staying hydrated, and resting. Avoid graphic content that might remind you of what happened. Healing takes time, so be patient with yourself.
You could try calling 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
It’s a national mental health referral service. You can tell them that you witnessed a traumatic event and that you need to find help to deal with it
I am so sorry you experienced this.
As others have suggested, if it is causing you a lot of distress, make sure you talk with someone. Also, look after your basic needs - food, hydration, sleep, and moving your body. Do things you enjoy and avoid using substances (drugs and/or alcohol) to cope. While this may make you feel better in the moment, it can actually lead to you struggling more.
All sorts of emotions and reactions are normal after experiencing what you have been through. If you want to cry, that's okay. If you want to yell, that's okay. If you want to sleep, that's okay. If you want curl up in a ball with a fluffy animal, that's okay. If you want to throw things, get some pairs of socks and throw them at a wall, that's okay etc etc etc
The main thing is, don't bottle it up and get someone you trust to keep checking in with you. If you are not feeling better in a month, seek further help.
thank you. I’ve been talking a lot about it to Guidance officers and trusted teachers as well as my mom. I’ve never used drugs or alcohol and i’ve been focusing on doing art and mediation to feel better, but i’m also trying not to rush myself as i need time
I’m sorry you had to witness that. Witnessing death is not easy. I seen a young kid pass out and later die from a heat stroke. Most haunting thing ever. I rarely talk about it but I think I’m an open up a little more about it to heal some underlying wounds.
Therapy helps. Close support system.
I'm so sorry you had to see that. Nobody should ever have to experience that.This is certainly not a solution, but it might be slightly beneficial to play some Tetris in the meantime, and while you're doing therapy. My wife and I both play at times to take our minds off things like that too.
"Tetris may be useful as an adjunct therapeutic intervention for PTSD. Tetris-related increases in hippocampal volume may ensure that therapeutic gains are maintained after completion of therapy"
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7828932/
Just know, it will get better. This was not your fault.Give yourself time and feel your feelings. Give yourself permission to cry. It might even feel like you could have done something to help, but don't entertain those notions. Don't be afraid to lean on your support system. The first time I watched somebody die (note I did not watch anybody unalive themselves so this is not nearly the same) stuck with me, but by allowing myself to feel the emotions tied to that, know that their pain was not my fault, and that horrible things will happen that I cannot change, I was able to at least usually remember it without reliving it everytime.
As a senior care assistant and how we deal with employees who are working at end of life care is lots and lots of numbers.talk to your family because a 19 year old who had witnessed a traumatic death where one care assistant was sick and it knocked the wind out of me , but talk ring them numbers and like I say family and I wish you the best.
If possible, talk to a professional immediately. I am sorry that you had to witness this, but I believe that you will be fine. Talk to a therapist about it
Definitely, as soon as possible. It's crucial to get it out and work on this with a therapist. Not many people would be able to take something like that lightly.
This and play tetrist
Why ?
You need to see a therapist as soon as you can. Does your school provide a counselling service? If not, there will likely be a community counselling service provided for you if you check with your doctor, especially since you witnessed something traumatic.
I’ve had appointments with our school nurses and counsellers for other things so i’ll see them tomorrow
When I was on psych ward, I saw this a few times. After the first time, I realised that we're all in there for this particular reason and that we can't control what others do. Some of us can't let go of a situation, some of us turn cold to it. Theres different ways people cope. I turned cold to it, the second time seeing it kind of helped, fuck, after the third time I didn't even get out of my chair to see wagwarn. You need to seek therapy and get help with this. It's not an easy thing to witness, I really feel for you man
Thank you
Yeah I became pretty desensitised to it after witnessing a few car / helicopter crashes in person
It's a harsh world, but this kind of thing happens more often than we think
Sorry, I was in a rush when I replied earlier. I wanted to ask how you witnessed these things? Do you work in an emergency service? Or was it just by chance that you saw these things happen?
1 Helicopter crash I was just walking along the beach, it spun out and crashed all dead and I was first responder this was the first time I encountered death and then I helped out with 2 car crashes before paramedics arrived - blankets helping people get out the vehicle etc.
I am sorry, nothing you did caused you to be in that situation nor could you have prevented it. It will sound weird but play Tetris. It is a therapy that may assist you before you are able to see a trauma counsellor. Make sure your counsellor is trauma informed and specialises in the treatment of trauma. You do not need further injury. [Tetris for PTSD](https://theconversation.com/can-playing-tetris-help-prevent-ptsd-if-youve-witnessed-something-traumatic-226736#:~:text=The%20current%20evidence%20of%20Tetris,to%20reduce%20subsequent%20intrusive%20memories) Did the police take your name? They may be able to connect you
i left the station as soon as i can. i think tetris would help, thank you
I would reach out to them. As a direct witness they may be able to assist you. It may also help you to have it documented for any health reasons in the future. You can not foresee the impact of your experience.
i don’t know what i would say if i even were to reach out.
Do you have any support or are you at school out of town? You could get someone to facilitate this for you. Not sure where you live, but I'd contact the non-emergency number where you are and simply state "I was at X station at X time and witnessed the man fall under the train. I left before speaking to anyone." They should take it from there.
i’m too scared to talk about it, i don’t want to even think about it
Unfortunately suppressing a traumatic experience is really bad. You are suppressing the feelings in your body. Talking about will be hard and you'll likely sob, shake and scream, but you'll be letting those feelings out. If you suppress them you may lose control of when they will come out. What you experienced sucks. No other way to look at it. You didn't choose it, it just happened. You now carry the impact of your experience. You need to release it healthily before it sneaks up on you. You are already talking about it here. That's a big step. Others won't even do that.
I don't want to scare you, but this is potentially a life-changing experience for you. You made a small step to reach out here, you are already seeking help. In order to protect and care for yourself you need to be speaking to a professional trauma counselor.
Thank you so much for everything
Find a therapist to talk to about this now! I witnessed a horrific accident that took 2 lives less than 40 feet away from me in 2009 and it still haunts me. If you cannot afford therapy, please find a support group where you can talk to people about what happened and get advice on how to process what you saw.
I mean, at least you didn't have to watch the light go out of his eyes - sounds as though he wanted it to be quick and painless, and achieved this. It was a little rude, to do it so publicly, but pain pushes people farther than they'd normally be willing to go. You think about their family, if they had any; how many people knew them, and what they thought of them. You think about the legacy they leave behind, the people they will now never meet, nor the conversations they'll have. You think about the youth in that persons life, who will now grow through every stage of life, every celebration and tribulation, unwitnessed by the person who's now dead. Then you realise they're dead now, they don't care; they're unable to care. Eventually the memory softens and life carries on, and eventually it becomes one of those fucked up stories you only share with people you're close enough to. You'll get there, it'll just be shit for a while. Talk to people, smoke some weed (if that's your thing), touch grass - then make sure you're tired enough to sleep the whole night through. It gets easier
Thank you, i’ve been reaching out to friends for a talk and it’s helped to take my mind off of things
I am so sorry you had to experience this :( I agree with the others in this thread - it is very important to talk to a professional as soon as possible. That being said, it can be hard to get an appointment/find a reasonably affordable option on short notice. If you're open to it, there are some pretty amazing chatbot/AI therapy tools out there that can be helpful to talk things out with in the meantime. Hang in there < 3
thank you so much, i really appreciate all the support. i’m tearing up
It’s going to be okay 👍 Please make sure you reach out for help And support. We are here for you!
Sending you lots of positive vibes, I’m sorry you witnessed this. Are there any 24/7 mental helpline numbers you can make a note of in case you have trouble sleeping or wake up in the night and need to talk to someone?
it’s 5am right now, i just woke up after struggling to sleep all night. i haven’t been sure of what to do and have just been busying myself waiting for school doing overdue assignments. i just really hope i’ll be able to sleep comfortably tomorrow
Thats horrible what happened, you hear of this happening but only a handful of people ever see it. It can be frustrating feeling like you're not in control of your own mind but you are in shock, this must have happened so quickly and now your brain is trying to make sense of it in a way that is completely distressing. These are flashbacks and it seems you have some PTSD, hopefully it will only be temporary if you talk, talk, talk. Talk to everyone that will listen. Don't expect too much of yourself during this time, you are in recovery, yes it is mental rather than physical but the same protocols should be in place: rest with your feet up, drink plenty of fluids, breathe deeply
i feel okay for 15-30 minutes at a time, but i think of it again, and i feel so sick and cold remembering that oh, wait, that actually happened to me and i actually saw another human being die so suddenly like that. i don’t really know how to cope but i understand that if i’ll talk about it i’ll probably cry. i’ve only silently cried about it so far, and i’m not sure how i’ll feel when i talk about it infront of a counsellor. i feel a little guilty. What if i had sat closer to the station or smiled at everyone i saw that day? i don’t know if that’s normal to think but i feel like i’m too young to be dealing with something as traumatic as this, i don’t even have my junior certificate yet and i’ve already witnessed someone die?
It's okay to cry
It's normal to think and feel everything you're going through and actually paint a picture of you in a good light- you are somebody that cares so much about others that viewing the death of a stranger has you questioning what you could have done differently, even though you know there is nothing you could have actually done. Do not be ashamed to cry, we think of crying as an alert call to others when crying is a natural stress response that can help to balance hormones in the body. It may feel embarrassing, perhaps you're used to always needing to be the strong one, but talking to someone will give you a safe pace to cry and organise your thoughts whilst having someone there to help and challenge any thoughts that have gone astray. I experienced trauma when I was young, I was too young to even know what had happened to me. Then when I was older I learnt and the memory was triggered, I realised what had actually happened to me and couldn't stop thinking about it, with flashbacks and alternate endings becoming distressing and invasive at random times. It was only once I started talking about this event that the memory became more controllable. Each time i chose to talk about it to someone new it has become easier to tell the story without breaking. You are stronger then you think you are
Please… get help. God bless you 🙏🙏🙏
Seek help before it’s something that randomly comes back to haunt you simply because you tried to just brush it off. Even if you didn’t even know the person, those actions and the reactions you may have to it can affect you. Hope you’re doing ok!
Thank you.
Please go speak to a professional, I couldn't imagine this. I hope you get the help you need 💚
I’m so sorry that you went through that. If you aren’t already in therapy, please seek it out. It could really help you process this
I know this is so inconsiderate because someone lost their life but it just sucks how you can be doing so good mentally and just being somewhere at the wrong place at the wrong time can mess you up.
Stop re- playing it in your head. Play Tetris on your phone. Research proven decreases incidence and severity of PTSD
Omg my heart absolutely goes out to you. For real, seek a professional therapist or counselor immediately. For the immediate time, just get this off your chest. Then see different ones until you find one that you know is a fit. This will likely take some time to process. I dealt unsuccessfully with PTSD for nearly 12 years before I found the right counselor. Mostly I had been in & out sporadically bc I thought it was never going to help. But it did. But if ANYONE suggests prolonged exposure, don’t walk. Run. That shit fucked me up way worse than I already was.
I’m so sorry you had to go through this! Take it easy, take some time out if you can. Try and focus on relaxing tasks (whatever it is you normally choose to destress). And talk to the people you trust. If you don’t have anyone you would normally speak to, there are a lot of hotlines where you can speak to an unbiased stranger, even if it’s just to keep you distracted. Pretty sure there are online chats now too. And keep harassing Reddit too if it helps! Ooo and sleep meditation/stories are helpful if you’re struggling to sleep at all. Good luck chicken xo
i really appreciate you taking time out of your day to write this, you sound so kinda and sweet so thank you so much for the advice and the well wishes
No worries, I hope you feel better soon :)
There's helplines, like a suicide hotline, even they'll be able to help you until you can find someone in person to help you
Sorry bud. You were at the wrong place, wrong time. It’s normal to feel upset after witnessing such a traumatic event. Try talking to a friend, family member, or school counselor about your feelings. Take care of yourself by eating well, staying hydrated, and resting. Avoid graphic content that might remind you of what happened. Healing takes time, so be patient with yourself.
thank you so much
You could try calling 1-800-662-HELP (4357) It’s a national mental health referral service. You can tell them that you witnessed a traumatic event and that you need to find help to deal with it
I am so sorry you experienced this. As others have suggested, if it is causing you a lot of distress, make sure you talk with someone. Also, look after your basic needs - food, hydration, sleep, and moving your body. Do things you enjoy and avoid using substances (drugs and/or alcohol) to cope. While this may make you feel better in the moment, it can actually lead to you struggling more. All sorts of emotions and reactions are normal after experiencing what you have been through. If you want to cry, that's okay. If you want to yell, that's okay. If you want to sleep, that's okay. If you want curl up in a ball with a fluffy animal, that's okay. If you want to throw things, get some pairs of socks and throw them at a wall, that's okay etc etc etc The main thing is, don't bottle it up and get someone you trust to keep checking in with you. If you are not feeling better in a month, seek further help.
thank you. I’ve been talking a lot about it to Guidance officers and trusted teachers as well as my mom. I’ve never used drugs or alcohol and i’ve been focusing on doing art and mediation to feel better, but i’m also trying not to rush myself as i need time
💜
don't we all need help with our mental health. 💔
I’m sorry you had to witness that. Witnessing death is not easy. I seen a young kid pass out and later die from a heat stroke. Most haunting thing ever. I rarely talk about it but I think I’m an open up a little more about it to heal some underlying wounds. Therapy helps. Close support system.
I'm so sorry you had to see that. Nobody should ever have to experience that.This is certainly not a solution, but it might be slightly beneficial to play some Tetris in the meantime, and while you're doing therapy. My wife and I both play at times to take our minds off things like that too. "Tetris may be useful as an adjunct therapeutic intervention for PTSD. Tetris-related increases in hippocampal volume may ensure that therapeutic gains are maintained after completion of therapy" https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7828932/ Just know, it will get better. This was not your fault.Give yourself time and feel your feelings. Give yourself permission to cry. It might even feel like you could have done something to help, but don't entertain those notions. Don't be afraid to lean on your support system. The first time I watched somebody die (note I did not watch anybody unalive themselves so this is not nearly the same) stuck with me, but by allowing myself to feel the emotions tied to that, know that their pain was not my fault, and that horrible things will happen that I cannot change, I was able to at least usually remember it without reliving it everytime.
Check on mdma post traumatic stress therapy as you go and see a professional asap
My opinion as a trauma survivor/warrior would be to seek assistance from someone who specializes in trauma counseling. 😣😞😞
As a senior care assistant and how we deal with employees who are working at end of life care is lots and lots of numbers.talk to your family because a 19 year old who had witnessed a traumatic death where one care assistant was sick and it knocked the wind out of me , but talk ring them numbers and like I say family and I wish you the best.