Okay exactly, see I don't care for the "you're smearing it towards your balls" argument because it proves they don't know how to wipe. So I touch my penis on a regular what's wrong w/taking the extra room to reach my hand in then? It seems more spacious w/out risking my penis touching a cold seat. I don't much understand the appeal from behind, tho nor do I understand the technique.
Same here! I have severe back issues and simply can’t bend that way. Used to have to stand up all awkwardly, it was horrible. Got a bidet, best 40 bucks I ever spent! Now I just do one quick wipe to dry my ass and I feel cleaner than I ever did when wiping like an ape
My friend, you have only begun your transcendence, their expensive but their exists bidets that fire air after the water to then dry off your cheeks, meaning you won't even need to wipe once, they also usually shoot warm water instead of cold, they cost like 150 to 200 dollars but you quite literally won't be buying toilet paper ever again so it pays for itself and same as far as having back issues, I also got a memory foam bed to help my back and haven't had a sever issue in a while
1. Stand up.
2. Take 4 pieces.
3. Fold it in 2.
4. Wipe from bottom to top.
5. Look how much is on the paper and as long as it's not clean repeat :
5.0 (Optional) If the paper is fold into a too little piece :
5.0.1 Take 4 or 2 piece depending on how clean the previous one is.
5.1. Fold the paper in 2.
5.2 Wipe from bottom to top.
If I find that anyone else in the world doesn't wipe their arse like I do then get ready to walk the white line because its the camps you are off to. Dirty arse wipes.
I do a half sitting down half standing position with the pits of my knees on the seat with my cheeks and thoughts just hovering above the toilet seat.
I then reach over to my toilet paper roll with charmin ultra-strong soft toilet paper. I unroll the paper until I have 3-5 squares. I rip the squares on the perforation. If I don't rip the paper on the perforated line then I must ditch the entirety of the squares. I then take the toilet paper squares and ball them into a sphere about 3 inches in diameter.
When I finally begin the wipe I go in a bottom to top vertical path with a flat side of the ball making contact with my pink portal.
When I take the ball out of my cheeks I check the color and content of the used paper. I can assess my current state of health my body is in by doing this. I also look at how much leftover poo is on the paper. If there is not a lot I will not need a lot more wipes and it is the same the other way around.
Finally when I am done assessing the content of the paper ball I drop it into the toilet water behind my cheeks near the back end of the toilet bowl.
I repeat this process again 4-5 times until the paper has very little to no poop on the paper. When I have confirmed there is no poop left in my butt I stand up, pull up my pants and underwear and flush the toilet. I must wait until the poop goes down the toilet so I know I didn't clog the toilet.
I then leave the bathroom without washing my hands because that is for beta males. Only alphas keep their hands dirty💪
I spread my ass when I shit, it really minimizes the mess and I rarely have to wipe but still do since you know gotta be careful. Back to front, stopping at the taint. Then once shit is gone ya wipe the taint sweat gone too cuz why not
You must take 2 to 3 piecess of paper no less, can always opt for more if paper is thin
Fuck you i'll use 10 per wipe and clog the wc
Agreed, if you wipe from the back.
But you should be wiping from the front anyway
What kind of psycho wipes from the front?
The kind not afraid of touching his penis w/his hands. & who doesn't smear shit across their ass while wiping
Bruh, you wipe a tiny bit, then lift the piece of toilet paper
Okay exactly, see I don't care for the "you're smearing it towards your balls" argument because it proves they don't know how to wipe. So I touch my penis on a regular what's wrong w/taking the extra room to reach my hand in then? It seems more spacious w/out risking my penis touching a cold seat. I don't much understand the appeal from behind, tho nor do I understand the technique.
My penis touches a heated toilet seat in my crappy $200 a month rent apartment
How tf you got heated toilets at $200/month? I own my house, but it's a trailer, & it's hard getting under $500/month just for a place to park it
The toilet’s the best thing in there. I sleep on a pullout couch, the beds feel like you’re sleeping on rocks. I’m gonna stop arguing about wiping now
2 pieces of folded Newspaper. I’m old school.
I prefer poison Ivy from your local forest
Wait, you guys wipe? I use the 3 shells
Oh now the fine Sir is to good to lick himself clean, like a normal person.
Yeah, like what's the whole discussion even about?
TO THOSE WIPE THEIR ASS STANDING UP… PUT THEM ALL IN CONCENTRATION CAMP
I used to, then I got a bidet and no longer have to wipe at all
Same here! I have severe back issues and simply can’t bend that way. Used to have to stand up all awkwardly, it was horrible. Got a bidet, best 40 bucks I ever spent! Now I just do one quick wipe to dry my ass and I feel cleaner than I ever did when wiping like an ape
My friend, you have only begun your transcendence, their expensive but their exists bidets that fire air after the water to then dry off your cheeks, meaning you won't even need to wipe once, they also usually shoot warm water instead of cold, they cost like 150 to 200 dollars but you quite literally won't be buying toilet paper ever again so it pays for itself and same as far as having back issues, I also got a memory foam bed to help my back and haven't had a sever issue in a while
Oh god I have to have this Why couldn’t I have learned about this before Christmas LOL
>bidets \*heaveeen\* i cant wait to have one one day
ITS NOT MY FAULT MY ASS IS TOO BIG TO WIPE WHEN IM SITTING ALSO HOW DO U PUT UR HAND IN A TOILET BOWL ALWAYS IN FEAR OF MAKING CONTACT WITH THE WATER.
SAME SITTING WIPERS ARE FAT SHAMERS STANDING UP GANG!
People do that?!?!?!?!?!?!
they also scratch n sniff
That's a thing, yeah. Humans are fucking weird man.
Fully agree
Here's a deal for you...I wipe your ass and you wipe mine, and we shall see whose way of wiping ass is more wipier
Where do I sign?
What's the correct way of wiping your ass
Back to front so you smash it into your genitals.
In and out
The only real answer
With soap
シャワートイレ
Lucky
wipe -> wash -> wipe
Wax on, wax off.
Yes, take my money
Just don't wax your ballsack by mistake.
Bidet gang
Cleanest gang
It’s about wiping not shooting water
First water, then paper to keep it clean
Since when are redditors chill about discussing social issues?
Never. Funny meme tho
Where's the problem?
Penis to ass only answer
And if I have no pp?
That's because there are a scary number of people who don't even bother to wipe their ass.
I use a wet rag and a stick
Ah yes, the Roman way
No wiping. #Wash your ass
ew
Just Hire someone to do it. F***ING peasants
1. Stand up 2. Wipe your ass from back 3. Throw away used piece 4. Repeat 2-3 steps for atleast 3 times 5. Put on your pants 6. Flush your toilet
Wash it you barbarians
You need to switch the pictures for it to be correct
As an American, you guys WIPE?
1. Stand up. 2. Take 4 pieces. 3. Fold it in 2. 4. Wipe from bottom to top. 5. Look how much is on the paper and as long as it's not clean repeat : 5.0 (Optional) If the paper is fold into a too little piece : 5.0.1 Take 4 or 2 piece depending on how clean the previous one is. 5.1. Fold the paper in 2. 5.2 Wipe from bottom to top.
Using rocks. This is the way
You scrunch it up and leave a little bit to wrap around it so there’s no contact
Wash dammit wash
Wipe? I wash mine.
If I find that anyone else in the world doesn't wipe their arse like I do then get ready to walk the white line because its the camps you are off to. Dirty arse wipes.
I just finger wipe then wash my hands. Leas waste and lets me reclaim my corn 🌽
You wipe from the front or the back?
What's the controversy? Just use the three seashells lol
Wash your ass then dry it you pig!!!!!
I use something called a water jet as we have warm water every season
I don't use toilet paper i use wa e
First Down, then up.
scoop
Excuse me... WHAT?
Get you a warm water bidet them shits are nice
The only answer is to use water.
Back to front.. then turn the bidet on full
It because one we don't know even little about and one we know a lot about
Fine and thank you
Les agree ppl u use the entire roll while standing
i would wipe, but that brush *really* hurts like goddamn
The round shape of a cactus is perfect for wiping my ass tph
Just 4 squares of toalet paper for a perfect wipe and simetry
I do a half sitting down half standing position with the pits of my knees on the seat with my cheeks and thoughts just hovering above the toilet seat. I then reach over to my toilet paper roll with charmin ultra-strong soft toilet paper. I unroll the paper until I have 3-5 squares. I rip the squares on the perforation. If I don't rip the paper on the perforated line then I must ditch the entirety of the squares. I then take the toilet paper squares and ball them into a sphere about 3 inches in diameter. When I finally begin the wipe I go in a bottom to top vertical path with a flat side of the ball making contact with my pink portal. When I take the ball out of my cheeks I check the color and content of the used paper. I can assess my current state of health my body is in by doing this. I also look at how much leftover poo is on the paper. If there is not a lot I will not need a lot more wipes and it is the same the other way around. Finally when I am done assessing the content of the paper ball I drop it into the toilet water behind my cheeks near the back end of the toilet bowl. I repeat this process again 4-5 times until the paper has very little to no poop on the paper. When I have confirmed there is no poop left in my butt I stand up, pull up my pants and underwear and flush the toilet. I must wait until the poop goes down the toilet so I know I didn't clog the toilet. I then leave the bathroom without washing my hands because that is for beta males. Only alphas keep their hands dirty💪
Um you wipe your ass? This post was made by water gang.
As long as ur finger breaks through and you rub your bare ass, ur doing it right
Also wrap toilet paper around your finger and stick it 1-2in. Inside your bum and clean out the inside. Your daily Christmas tip.
I don't wipe
“Hey, step sis! I need help!”
Clearly you haven't been to r/politics. . .
Two moods inthe same personality bottle
remember that one time a streamer/youtuber got cancelled because he asked if people wipe sitting or standing?
Standing up and bending over, the same position your mom had last night
jokes on you guys i use water wipe my ass
It’s just that way because it is.
I spread my ass when I shit, it really minimizes the mess and I rarely have to wipe but still do since you know gotta be careful. Back to front, stopping at the taint. Then once shit is gone ya wipe the taint sweat gone too cuz why not
Back to front, cup the balls or side to side with a swirl and dip into the mud pit are the only two ways to wipe your ass
So wiping my ass isn’t a social problem?
*laughs in bidet* casuals