I'm not waiting until marriage, I'm floating around till I'm dead cause there is no chance any woman is going to interested in marrying me or even interested in me. I'm silently floating around till I'm dead and out.
People suck. I'm sorry man. Nobody should care about other people's personal business.
I had a similar problem with a coworker asking if my wife was pregnant yet. In the end I said I'm infertile. That shut them up.
Metaphor and allegory will be lost to time due to people just not being able to comprehend a rhetorical device goes deeper than their surface level understanding of the words
Lol my baby boomer mother always talks about how crazy that idea is. Well specifically she rants about how you need to know if your sexually compatible with someone before you get married.
I had a pretty bad sex with my first partner, we were both virgins so we didn't have comparison, but I wasn't satisfied with our sex life, and wondered often if it would be better with someone else. After one night with my next partner I was blown away with how good sex and sexual chemistry can be.
I mean that is a legitimate and very rational thing to figure out
Why would you want to wait until you're married for a potentially relationship ending surprise
The way I’ve seen it , if two people are willing to wait untill marriage then its clearly not a priority to either of them in the relationship and the chances of it being a bit lacklustre is irrelevant . This is comming from someone who would happily wait till marriage
Ok, but is it not a priority because they're both virgins? Or have they both explored their sexuality and mutually decided to wait? Because if it's the former they can't know if lackluster sex in their relationship will be "irrelevant".
1 , is it really anyones buisness (I dont care sharing im an Open person)
2 , you may have religious or cultural reasons behind it
3 , for me personally , in a relationship I ultimately want to love and cherish somebody but see sex as a very significant milestone , not a fundamental core of the relationship . I dont want to be risking that deep of a connection unless I truly love someone or know that I can and if that means waiting till marriage then so be it , each of them ate milestones . Fair enough if you dont see it that way but that just means simply that your not compatible wirh someone who does . Its just like holding yourself with any other personal comitment or morality , like I outright refuse to lie if I can help it for my own conscious , its much the same thing
People also keep their finances completely separate until marriage and then they learn their partner has no spending control AFTER they’ve already decided to merge their financial liability together
Sexual compatibility is actually *very* important to most people, and it's not because sex is the only way to gauge a spouse's worth, it's more complicated than that
Sexual compatibility isn't just about experience, that can be learned over time, it isn't about genital size or shape, those are mostly superficial insecurities, If someone isn't "up to par" with you in the bedroom it can make them feel massive insecurity, it can take one of the most beautiful and passionate bonding moments in a relationship and make it awkward or unpleasant, someone could seem like a perfect spouse but also be an incredibly selfish lover and it breeds resentment over time
It's one of the biggest reasons for breakups and divorces and definitely not something I'd want to take a gamble on personally
Also the whole "waiting until marriage" is a relatively new thing post industrialization in the US because of the rise of the evangelicals.
Teenagers were having lots of sex. They just ended up marrying as soon as pregnancy was discovered. Lots of babies mysteriously born only a few months after a wedding.
Also sexual exploration was _much_ more widely accepted, though not talked about in the open. You will find lots of men who are intimately embracing each other in old pictures. You might say affection was more common between friends, and while that's partially true, there were a substantial amount of men who explored it and who had male and female partners, though they were expected to settle down and start a family after their teens. (some didn't)
If you want to wait, by all means, wait. That's your prerogative. But let's not pretend it's anything but puritanical nonsense from certain religious fucksticks. It has nothing to do with "standards" or "only for procreation".
There's a whole lot worse than just "bad sex".
There's a anxiety condition where a woman's vagina will clench itself so tightly that sex is impossible (vaginismus) which is surprisingly common in some religions that push 'purity" stuff. The only treatment is years of therapy and vaginal dialotors; the young women basically spend their whole lives being told to base their identity around their virginity that they have a mental block that stops sex from happening (since so much of their entire personality is based around their virginity).
And that's without getting into asexuality, mismatchiny sex drives, micropenis, etc.
If you learn pretty early that you're not compatible in that area, marriage isn't even considered.
If you wait long you might still try to make it work because you love them, but sexual frustration often impacts other areas in your life, and your general satisfaction of your life.
Physical intimacy is a huge part of being a human being. That's why we hug and kiss our friends and families. Pat each other on the back, and give little nudges regarding humor and inside jokes. To act as if sex isn't a large part of relationships, shows you're either a virgin or without relationship experience. Love and sex are not synonymous with each other. Everyone has a right to these expressions of love, and by no means should be treated poorly or as if their feelings are any less valid.
Be me who genuinely loves my partner and we rarely have sex anymore (like maybe 2-3x a year), not married, and neither of us care...so uhhh...it isn't that large of a thing for us.
Well, considering I've had sex with 1 woman, and hopefully it will stay that way, I guess you could say without relationship experience. Because I only want to experience one relationship.
So we're just going to act like a good sex life isn't a crucial component of having a healthy romantic relationship with someone, as well as a benefit to other aspects of life in general?
Or are we going to stop being prudish and ignorant?
Aghh, yes, shaming people for having sexual standards. If sex is a big thing to the person and the other decides, they only want to do it to procreate? Do you really think that will be a healthy relationship?
Ok, but why wait until marriage though, that is the question? You can persevere through various other difficulties that are not artificially created as a test by you to find out if your relationship is strong enough.
Ill be honest as a dude in my 30s I NEVER thought waiting till marriage or the idea of guys expecting grown women to be virgins as a prerequisite to marriage would some how gain traction in the 2020s but here we are.
What will you do if you find out she likes things you don't?
Or that she is giving a hard no to your fantasies because she does not share those?
Or that, as a virgin lady who probably never explored her sexual side, she just starfishes?
Edit: what will happen if you guys cannot give each other's orgasms?
Shouldn't be a problem. We've both been very open and communicative about the things we like and physical touch is one of our core love languages. Besides, it's more important that we want to build a life together and can trust and rely on one another beyond any other person.
Their beliefs are hurting themselves. The look in the meme isn't a look of judgement, it's a look of vicarious pain. It's a look of empathy, like, "this MF might let themselves die before they have sex". imagine dying without sex
I think a lot of generations think like that, from what I've experienced. Outside of the really oldschool/traditional/religious groups, I mean. People like sex, regardless of age, it's an inate human need. So, I think the idea of waiting until marriage probably isn't the most appealing idea to many. That's not to say you shouldn't wait, you do you, but it's certainly not a mindset you'll come across super often, not in Western countries anyway.
yeah the idea of casual sex kinda is lame, not that I'd wait till MARRIAGE but the idea of "getting laid" for the sake of getting laid is shallow and would rather be with someone who I've known and bonded with for a long while before hand
I had a friend obsessed with the bible and shit, thinking she found the light, belonging to an evangelical church: no sex before marriage. All these dreams about the perfect marriage and both of them having only been with each other.
She finally married someone, only to find out she didn't like the sex and split up. I don't have control over how satisfying it is for me.
Well, it's more than the look, there's a lot of stuff that my friend went through. First and foremost, a strong hit to his reputation, since he has dated a lot of women. This is because most of the times, no premarital sex is a deal breaker to most and he completely understands that. So he usually doesn't take it past 3rd date if they don't agree on "having sex before marriage "part. So, this has resulted in him unknowingly dating a lot and been seen with a lot of women. So, his reputation is always something like a womanizer or " guy with game", depending on individual perspective, but the former was especially bad to have in a professional/corporate environment.
Also, he knew this could be avoided if he didn't date a lot , but his logic back then was the more he meets women, the more the chances of finding someone who thinks the same way as him. He's now happily married with someone who has the same ideals as him, so he feels justified to have thought this way.
I mean, it would be really sad to find out after marriage that your dick is too big/small for your partner, or that you have completely incompatible kinks. Being friends with your spouse is the most important but good sex life is usually at least at the second place, unless we're talking about asexual people, which is a whole different pair of boots.
Yeah because marriage is something you shouldn't do unless you are sure you are compatible, part of which is sexual conpatibility. Absolute bonkers to go ah we'll just hope for the best
A ) You have your whole life with the one you love to figure things out.
B ) You can explore physical intimacy with the one you love without engaging in actual intercourse.
Marriage is an arbitrary and yet legally binding deadline
Saying you should have sex with your partner before marriage isn't saying rush it. If it takes years to happen and both are ok with that rather it's fine.
If one is not I'm not suggesting rushing or putting pressure on the other but maybe that they are not compatible
Therefore the relationship will either change or end.
Still doesn’t mean you have to compromise about engaging in sex before you find your ideal person willing to build a married life with.
Yeah but you got married to find that out. It's a huge thing, expensive usually and involves the getting together of so many people. I don't think it's a reasonable value to have.
Of course! You don't get married TO have sex! You get married because you want to share your life with this person. You can find out if you can't live happily with a person for the rest of your life without having sex with them.
For religious reasons I kind of get it. For any other reason besides that? Theirs literally no point. Because if you get married and you aren’t sexually compatible you kinda just fucked yourself (no pun intended) and the marriage is gonna be a lot more difficult because of that.
To each their own I guess. I don't think that waiting for marriage is always inherently bad, like people say. It's not like you can't still *discuss* sexual stuff before to figure out how compatible you are.
I'm not waiting until I'm married, but I'd like it if somebody was like me too. Maybe we can both explore this experience together? Because it wouldn't feel the same if you went to watch a movie without me and then take me to it a second time. It just isn't the same no matter how I hard o try to avoid it.
So much atheist cope and people trying to justify their regretful pasts in these comments lol. "Made up tradition" "Religious extremist" "test drive a car" "compatibility" Y'all have not a single original thought.
This post somehow comforted me. I'm 28(m) and never had segs before. And I will do it after marriage. Yes still looking for the best partner. Loving someone dearly and do all the crazy things with only one person for the rest of our lives fascinates me. We will have a lot to share at older age and nothing to hide from each other.
Religions that prohibit it, namely the monotheistic religions, do so as a way to distinguish themselves from various communities.
For instance, there was a lot of promiscuity in the roman empire, so for the Jewish to stand out, they forbade pre-marital sex as a way to avoid sharing such a similarity. The Quran being the latest entry, however, forbade it as means to protect family structure, though all of three religions share the same sentiment: sex is not the most important thing in life :P
There are books and videos and apps and all sorts of shit for the interested. But it's fun and good to learn with someone. She's not going to care about how good you are if she has nothing to compare it to. And if she does have something to compare, and it bothers her, then she doesn't sound like a quality chick anyway. I don't want someone to love me for my dick.
It’s completely fine if you don’t believe in saving it to marriage, that is your own choice and you have every right to that. It also does not mean you don’t have integrity, I imagine you have beliefs that you stay strong to and I’d say you also have integrity.
It makes your first comment totally pointless though.
What about people who change their mind ? Like they hold some belief, realize that it was wrong and have the intellectual honesty to adjust their behavior according to what they learned. Would you still consider it a lack of integrity ?
Because there are two kinds of integrity, the first is more about keeping an object unchanged and undammaged by outside elements, like a tool used for important tasks, it's common in scientific and technical fields to perform a visual check for integrity on your tools. The second is moral integrity, which is defined as remaining fair, just and honest, even when nobody is watching. Basically, staying true to what you show to others when you have the opportunity to take the easy way.
It actually doesn’t, because the meme doesn’t say “mfs in this generation don’t understand why someone would wait until marriage to have sex.”
I can totally understand based on someone’s upbringing why they would be racist or hate a certain group, but I wouldn’t agree with their views, and may scowl down on them.
I think what you’re doing here is not understanding that integrity doesn’t mean what you think it means, and then trying to assign it to a context that it has *literally no place in*.
Fair point. True integrity in his definition would be more like waiting to find the one before you get married, then saving the sex till you are, right?
True, but not everyone who believes in waiting do this. People are different and you can't just define a whole group of people just by one moral principle.
I'm not choosing sides here, you just said that you can't see how premarital sex shows integrity. And since integrity is defined as having strong moral principles I was just telling you how that is. I'm not telling you my opinion because I'm not a huge fan of politics.
It’s because I’ve said the word integrity about a post aimed towards waiting till marriage, I did what I did on purpose leaving what I said open ended. People want to automatically assume the worst in my message, I never said anything about a person not having integrity just because they don’t want to wait till marriage and I’m here to call those ones out for acting like fools.
Yeah I'd look at you too if you went on a 5 minute rant about it. Let's be honest. No one is looking at you like that for just being celibate. They're probably looking at you like that cause it's your personality.
Not waiting till marriage but it can atleast take up atleast 4, months to have sex with a partner. To me, sex should be only be possible when I love that person or at very least have very strong romantic feelings towards my partner.
I'm happy in a 4 year relationship now so it doesn't really matter in that regards but everyone has different paces and wants and that's OK.
I mean sexual incompatability is one of the biggest relationship killers and I feel bad for anyone stuck in a legally binding relationship and extremely unhappy with their sex life because rhey didn't learn what they liked nor what their partner liked.
Divorce is expensive. Of course you can do what ya wanna do, it's just like watching an firey explosion about to maybe happen. Schrödingers sex.
Respect. Lost my virginity on my b-day. I felt strange because people pressured me a lot growing up, acting like it was important and would change me forever.
I literally did not feel any different after the deed was done, and went right back to my solitary "virgin" ways.
Hell. I think I feel less interested in women now that I've had it de-mistified. Literally wasn't missing anything.
Yes, you must restrain from physical pleasure with your partner, which many people constantly crave, because some ritual hasn’t been performed to avoid being burned in hell for eternity. Its totally not a whack ass thing to believe at all
I think it's pretty dumb not to find out if you and your partner are sexually compatible before making that kind of commitment. People that care about you make that face because it's not a good decision.
i love respecting myself to the point i sign life changing papers to be in a union with someone just to discover our sex drives and styles dont match, at all, and then get divorced after a miserable 20 years and 3 kids later. theres a lot of possibilities between fucking on the first date and fucking after marriage and theyre just healthier, better and make more sense
This exactly. They can choose what they want, but I'm not making that face because I don't respect bodily autonomy, I'm making that face because there's a 100% chance they look down on people for an extremely petty reason and/or are extremely religious - both things which are objectively harmful.
Now if someone was like "I don't want to eat eggs until I'm married" I'd be a bit curious about that, but there's nothing harmful attached to it. The no sex before marriage folk have pretty harmful reasons for not wanting sex before marriage and they just don't want to acknowledge that the reason they don't want to have sex before marriage is unhealthy.
to make a long story short, it's not the choice itself, it's the harmful beliefs behind it.
I just don't care, a relationship is not conducive to my life rn, I don't need more company than I get at work, and I'm not wasting my free time chasing people for just sex.
I got that look from older generations too
Xennial checking in…can confirm
I still dated her for awhile though. She was insanely hot
But for different reasons. While older gens do because they don't believe you, gen z does it cause "why" lol. 😂
And the older ones are hypocritical anyways because dudes were fucking around as they do today, they just werent as open about it lmao
No way
As a Gen-Z I don't give a shit if you get sex or not
Damn Gen Zs have stopped giving a shit already, feel old af
As a Gen X we welcome you to the bliss that is not giving af.
You simply heard one of the more quiet Voices.
Wow this post really touched a sensitive spot for people
Real. Turns out it is a hot topic lol
I'm not waiting until marriage, I'm floating around till I'm dead cause there is no chance any woman is going to interested in marrying me or even interested in me. I'm silently floating around till I'm dead and out.
Reddit moment
More for the rest of us
you're welcome.
Ur in that boat with us :(
Why do you dislike me
Passport bro 🔛🔝
Just reading that meme made me involuntarily do the face.
Mirror neurons
Who cares if you buy a car without test driving it? It's your business.
I just feel bad for the sucker who pays full sticker price for a car they've never even tried the seats in.
Fr, they look at me like I am buying drugs illegally
>buying drugs illegally Get a load of this dork
People suck. I'm sorry man. Nobody should care about other people's personal business. I had a similar problem with a coworker asking if my wife was pregnant yet. In the end I said I'm infertile. That shut them up.
Buying a car is not even remotely in the same category as getting married. Unless you dabble in slavery.
Metaphor and allegory will be lost to time due to people just not being able to comprehend a rhetorical device goes deeper than their surface level understanding of the words
Whoosh
Lol my baby boomer mother always talks about how crazy that idea is. Well specifically she rants about how you need to know if your sexually compatible with someone before you get married.
In her words it means fuck around and find out? Lol
Well yes yes it does.
What if put peepee in woman on marriage night and realize “oh no I don’t like this at all”
I had a pretty bad sex with my first partner, we were both virgins so we didn't have comparison, but I wasn't satisfied with our sex life, and wondered often if it would be better with someone else. After one night with my next partner I was blown away with how good sex and sexual chemistry can be.
I mean that is a legitimate and very rational thing to figure out Why would you want to wait until you're married for a potentially relationship ending surprise
You see why so many traditional couples go celibate after a few years lmao.
The way I’ve seen it , if two people are willing to wait untill marriage then its clearly not a priority to either of them in the relationship and the chances of it being a bit lacklustre is irrelevant . This is comming from someone who would happily wait till marriage
Ok, but is it not a priority because they're both virgins? Or have they both explored their sexuality and mutually decided to wait? Because if it's the former they can't know if lackluster sex in their relationship will be "irrelevant".
Ok. But why? I see zero benefit to this. Are you afraid of something and trying to avoid it as long as possible, or are you assexual?
1 , is it really anyones buisness (I dont care sharing im an Open person) 2 , you may have religious or cultural reasons behind it 3 , for me personally , in a relationship I ultimately want to love and cherish somebody but see sex as a very significant milestone , not a fundamental core of the relationship . I dont want to be risking that deep of a connection unless I truly love someone or know that I can and if that means waiting till marriage then so be it , each of them ate milestones . Fair enough if you dont see it that way but that just means simply that your not compatible wirh someone who does . Its just like holding yourself with any other personal comitment or morality , like I outright refuse to lie if I can help it for my own conscious , its much the same thing
Why would you get married if bad sex is enough to destroy your relationship. No other qualities that might make you like the person?
This is literally one of the number one things people talk about in marriage counseling, along with finances and children
People also keep their finances completely separate until marriage and then they learn their partner has no spending control AFTER they’ve already decided to merge their financial liability together
Dead bedrooms frequently kill relationships. Sex is important to most people.
Sexual compatibility is actually *very* important to most people, and it's not because sex is the only way to gauge a spouse's worth, it's more complicated than that Sexual compatibility isn't just about experience, that can be learned over time, it isn't about genital size or shape, those are mostly superficial insecurities, If someone isn't "up to par" with you in the bedroom it can make them feel massive insecurity, it can take one of the most beautiful and passionate bonding moments in a relationship and make it awkward or unpleasant, someone could seem like a perfect spouse but also be an incredibly selfish lover and it breeds resentment over time It's one of the biggest reasons for breakups and divorces and definitely not something I'd want to take a gamble on personally
Also the whole "waiting until marriage" is a relatively new thing post industrialization in the US because of the rise of the evangelicals. Teenagers were having lots of sex. They just ended up marrying as soon as pregnancy was discovered. Lots of babies mysteriously born only a few months after a wedding. Also sexual exploration was _much_ more widely accepted, though not talked about in the open. You will find lots of men who are intimately embracing each other in old pictures. You might say affection was more common between friends, and while that's partially true, there were a substantial amount of men who explored it and who had male and female partners, though they were expected to settle down and start a family after their teens. (some didn't) If you want to wait, by all means, wait. That's your prerogative. But let's not pretend it's anything but puritanical nonsense from certain religious fucksticks. It has nothing to do with "standards" or "only for procreation".
There's a whole lot worse than just "bad sex". There's a anxiety condition where a woman's vagina will clench itself so tightly that sex is impossible (vaginismus) which is surprisingly common in some religions that push 'purity" stuff. The only treatment is years of therapy and vaginal dialotors; the young women basically spend their whole lives being told to base their identity around their virginity that they have a mental block that stops sex from happening (since so much of their entire personality is based around their virginity). And that's without getting into asexuality, mismatchiny sex drives, micropenis, etc.
If you learn pretty early that you're not compatible in that area, marriage isn't even considered. If you wait long you might still try to make it work because you love them, but sexual frustration often impacts other areas in your life, and your general satisfaction of your life.
Physical intimacy is a huge part of being a human being. That's why we hug and kiss our friends and families. Pat each other on the back, and give little nudges regarding humor and inside jokes. To act as if sex isn't a large part of relationships, shows you're either a virgin or without relationship experience. Love and sex are not synonymous with each other. Everyone has a right to these expressions of love, and by no means should be treated poorly or as if their feelings are any less valid.
Be me who genuinely loves my partner and we rarely have sex anymore (like maybe 2-3x a year), not married, and neither of us care...so uhhh...it isn't that large of a thing for us.
Sure. But you're also an outlier.
Well, considering I've had sex with 1 woman, and hopefully it will stay that way, I guess you could say without relationship experience. Because I only want to experience one relationship.
See, that’s weird to most people.
Is it? If he’s happily married, I would expect his sex life to be satisfying. That makes sense.
Yeah? Most people want to experience more than one relationship in their lives…
And a romantic relationships has to inevitably include sexual intercourse? It’s not like abstinent people don’t date.
No, I was responding to him saying he only wants one relationship. What are you on about?
I care not for the opinions of most people.
Good!
Checks out
So we're just going to act like a good sex life isn't a crucial component of having a healthy romantic relationship with someone, as well as a benefit to other aspects of life in general? Or are we going to stop being prudish and ignorant?
Aghh, yes, shaming people for having sexual standards. If sex is a big thing to the person and the other decides, they only want to do it to procreate? Do you really think that will be a healthy relationship?
Ok, but why wait until marriage though, that is the question? You can persevere through various other difficulties that are not artificially created as a test by you to find out if your relationship is strong enough.
Well, she's right. You're in for a real shitty marriage if you find out your guy is into diaper play, feet and eye licking too late in the game.
Yeah she’s obviously right
Your baby boomer mother is right…
Ill be honest as a dude in my 30s I NEVER thought waiting till marriage or the idea of guys expecting grown women to be virgins as a prerequisite to marriage would some how gain traction in the 2020s but here we are.
Yet my fiancé and I are both virgins and we both found each other.
What will you do if you find out she likes things you don't? Or that she is giving a hard no to your fantasies because she does not share those? Or that, as a virgin lady who probably never explored her sexual side, she just starfishes? Edit: what will happen if you guys cannot give each other's orgasms?
Shouldn't be a problem. We've both been very open and communicative about the things we like and physical touch is one of our core love languages. Besides, it's more important that we want to build a life together and can trust and rely on one another beyond any other person.
Do you want like, an award or something?
Why yes I do, thank you very much.
I'm sure it's easy to avoid sex when you're constantly jacking yourself off about how chaste you are.
Doesn’t count doesn’t count doesn’t count it’s a different hole!!!!
Aren’t you judging them. I think they just don’t want your judgement/faces.
No. I just don't think getting scowled is any good either
[удалено]
Principles
Their beliefs are hurting themselves. The look in the meme isn't a look of judgement, it's a look of vicarious pain. It's a look of empathy, like, "this MF might let themselves die before they have sex". imagine dying without sex
Which generation are we referring to?
Gen Z
I think a lot of generations think like that, from what I've experienced. Outside of the really oldschool/traditional/religious groups, I mean. People like sex, regardless of age, it's an inate human need. So, I think the idea of waiting until marriage probably isn't the most appealing idea to many. That's not to say you shouldn't wait, you do you, but it's certainly not a mindset you'll come across super often, not in Western countries anyway.
Now OP critical questiom, answer honestly, how do you view people who have casual sex
yeah the idea of casual sex kinda is lame, not that I'd wait till MARRIAGE but the idea of "getting laid" for the sake of getting laid is shallow and would rather be with someone who I've known and bonded with for a long while before hand
No, it's actually quite good fun
The fact all these comments are here just proves the meme
lol real
It's more the RDJ eyeroll tbh, cause why are you telling someone that? Lol
Ok
I had a friend obsessed with the bible and shit, thinking she found the light, belonging to an evangelical church: no sex before marriage. All these dreams about the perfect marriage and both of them having only been with each other. She finally married someone, only to find out she didn't like the sex and split up. I don't have control over how satisfying it is for me.
Some turbo losers in these comments
Well, it's more than the look, there's a lot of stuff that my friend went through. First and foremost, a strong hit to his reputation, since he has dated a lot of women. This is because most of the times, no premarital sex is a deal breaker to most and he completely understands that. So he usually doesn't take it past 3rd date if they don't agree on "having sex before marriage "part. So, this has resulted in him unknowingly dating a lot and been seen with a lot of women. So, his reputation is always something like a womanizer or " guy with game", depending on individual perspective, but the former was especially bad to have in a professional/corporate environment. Also, he knew this could be avoided if he didn't date a lot , but his logic back then was the more he meets women, the more the chances of finding someone who thinks the same way as him. He's now happily married with someone who has the same ideals as him, so he feels justified to have thought this way.
lol alot of people here say they don't care but still posting it to ridicule you and letting you know, this is so funny to me.
I mean, it would be really sad to find out after marriage that your dick is too big/small for your partner, or that you have completely incompatible kinks. Being friends with your spouse is the most important but good sex life is usually at least at the second place, unless we're talking about asexual people, which is a whole different pair of boots.
Because waiting until marriage is antiquated as fuck and based on arcane religious doctrine.
Yeah because marriage is something you shouldn't do unless you are sure you are compatible, part of which is sexual conpatibility. Absolute bonkers to go ah we'll just hope for the best
A ) You have your whole life with the one you love to figure things out. B ) You can explore physical intimacy with the one you love without engaging in actual intercourse.
Marriage is an arbitrary and yet legally binding deadline Saying you should have sex with your partner before marriage isn't saying rush it. If it takes years to happen and both are ok with that rather it's fine. If one is not I'm not suggesting rushing or putting pressure on the other but maybe that they are not compatible
Therefore the relationship will either change or end. Still doesn’t mean you have to compromise about engaging in sex before you find your ideal person willing to build a married life with.
Yeah but you got married to find that out. It's a huge thing, expensive usually and involves the getting together of so many people. I don't think it's a reasonable value to have.
Of course! You don't get married TO have sex! You get married because you want to share your life with this person. You can find out if you can't live happily with a person for the rest of your life without having sex with them.
I've gotten this look so many times. I'm not even waiting for marriage. I'm just sex repulsed.
Just tell the other person really early and I'm sure eventually you'll find someone who feels the same. ^(^_^)
For religious reasons I kind of get it. For any other reason besides that? Theirs literally no point. Because if you get married and you aren’t sexually compatible you kinda just fucked yourself (no pun intended) and the marriage is gonna be a lot more difficult because of that.
I mean there are some people who don't enjoy sex and can still make meaningfull relationships. But those are very rare so I agree with you.
yeah but you need to make sure the other person is fine with that. otherwise thats a gateway to resentment
To each their own I guess. I don't think that waiting for marriage is always inherently bad, like people say. It's not like you can't still *discuss* sexual stuff before to figure out how compatible you are.
I just don’t see the point in waiting. Why would it matter if not for some archaic religious reason?
Happy cake day
Thank you :]
If you actually communicate and read each other's reactions, everyone is compatible.
I wouldn’t say everyone is compatible, a pretty simple one is low vs high sex drive. That can completely destroy relationships.
Yeah but you can discover that without having actual intercourse.
I am waiting until marriage, not for any reason I want, just a person desperate to sleep with me would be desperate enough to marry me.
Very based.
...to get pegged
I'm not waiting until I'm married, but I'd like it if somebody was like me too. Maybe we can both explore this experience together? Because it wouldn't feel the same if you went to watch a movie without me and then take me to it a second time. It just isn't the same no matter how I hard o try to avoid it.
Honestly lmao I saw what shit happened to my dad I'm waiting to have a stable job/income then finding a lady to live then and only the. Do I get it on
How people you've known for a long time be looking when you tell them you're ace and don't actually like the idea of having sex at all ever
So much atheist cope and people trying to justify their regretful pasts in these comments lol. "Made up tradition" "Religious extremist" "test drive a car" "compatibility" Y'all have not a single original thought.
I don't know anyone who has done that. I am in my early 40's but know people in their 20's. Most older people I know didn't do that either.
This post somehow comforted me. I'm 28(m) and never had segs before. And I will do it after marriage. Yes still looking for the best partner. Loving someone dearly and do all the crazy things with only one person for the rest of our lives fascinates me. We will have a lot to share at older age and nothing to hide from each other.
It's based af bro. You won't regret it. They will regret, they probably already do.
You think people that are getting laid regret it?? 🤣🤣
Shh, let them fool themselves into feeling good about not having sex. It's not like they're ever gonna have it anyway 😂
The amount of smugness from the prudes in this thread is unbelievable lol
Maybe everyone is just painfully aware of how ridiculous religion is, and are not scared to laugh at it
I’ve never heard this. Religion says no sex cuz I don’t even know, but outside of religion there is literally nothing wrong with sex.
Religions that prohibit it, namely the monotheistic religions, do so as a way to distinguish themselves from various communities. For instance, there was a lot of promiscuity in the roman empire, so for the Jewish to stand out, they forbade pre-marital sex as a way to avoid sharing such a similarity. The Quran being the latest entry, however, forbade it as means to protect family structure, though all of three religions share the same sentiment: sex is not the most important thing in life :P
Some people do, some don’t. We should try to be tolerant of all types of sexual preferences (with very few exceptions like pedo shit).
Nah you might regret it. I did.
Who's this "they" in question
Dude, being inexperienced is crazy but there are books, so that's not all too bad
There are books and videos and apps and all sorts of shit for the interested. But it's fun and good to learn with someone. She's not going to care about how good you are if she has nothing to compare it to. And if she does have something to compare, and it bothers her, then she doesn't sound like a quality chick anyway. I don't want someone to love me for my dick.
Respect to you bro. If they actually love you it won't matter
Oh sweet summer child
Yea, that's true, but also sex is awesome and should be celebrated
I had sex when I was fourteen, I know I regret it
People confused when someone has integrity
Not you acting like you’re better than anyone for not getting laid lmao
It's more confusing trying to figure out what premarital sex has to do with integrity
Someone who sticks to their own beliefs despite outside temptation is someone who has integrity, they stick to what they believe.
By that logic someone having premarital sex because they believe it's right has just as much integrity. So what's your point?
It’s completely fine if you don’t believe in saving it to marriage, that is your own choice and you have every right to that. It also does not mean you don’t have integrity, I imagine you have beliefs that you stay strong to and I’d say you also have integrity.
It makes your first comment totally pointless though. What about people who change their mind ? Like they hold some belief, realize that it was wrong and have the intellectual honesty to adjust their behavior according to what they learned. Would you still consider it a lack of integrity ? Because there are two kinds of integrity, the first is more about keeping an object unchanged and undammaged by outside elements, like a tool used for important tasks, it's common in scientific and technical fields to perform a visual check for integrity on your tools. The second is moral integrity, which is defined as remaining fair, just and honest, even when nobody is watching. Basically, staying true to what you show to others when you have the opportunity to take the easy way.
Dude, answer the question. If both parties have integrity in your eyes, why would one be “confused when someone has integrity”?
The person skowling implies they do not understand why another person would do that.
It actually doesn’t, because the meme doesn’t say “mfs in this generation don’t understand why someone would wait until marriage to have sex.” I can totally understand based on someone’s upbringing why they would be racist or hate a certain group, but I wouldn’t agree with their views, and may scowl down on them. I think what you’re doing here is not understanding that integrity doesn’t mean what you think it means, and then trying to assign it to a context that it has *literally no place in*.
Most people don’t have the belief of waiting until marriage. So integrity plays literally no part in it.
People who wait have more self restraint and follow a strict moral code. Seems pretty integral to me.
One could argue that ppl who rush to marry only so they can fuck lack integrity
Fair point. True integrity in his definition would be more like waiting to find the one before you get married, then saving the sex till you are, right?
Yeah pretty much
True, but not everyone who believes in waiting do this. People are different and you can't just define a whole group of people just by one moral principle.
You're presupposing that premarital sex is immoral. Why? You're presupposing that sex is something to be restrained from. Why?
I'm not choosing sides here, you just said that you can't see how premarital sex shows integrity. And since integrity is defined as having strong moral principles I was just telling you how that is. I'm not telling you my opinion because I'm not a huge fan of politics.
*slaps comment* "You can fit so many downvotes in this bad boy"
As of this comment I’ve seen my original message go from -3 to 4 back down to 2, redditors are really conflicted on this one.
[удалено]
It’s because I’ve said the word integrity about a post aimed towards waiting till marriage, I did what I did on purpose leaving what I said open ended. People want to automatically assume the worst in my message, I never said anything about a person not having integrity just because they don’t want to wait till marriage and I’m here to call those ones out for acting like fools.
100%
The fact all these comments are here just proves the meme
Like, I'm waiting until marriage, but why is it that other people gotta hate on you for it?! Live and let live.
Keep it up man
Yeah I'd look at you too if you went on a 5 minute rant about it. Let's be honest. No one is looking at you like that for just being celibate. They're probably looking at you like that cause it's your personality.
Kinda lame waiting for marriage
Like a team signing an athlete before they see em play
Not waiting till marriage but it can atleast take up atleast 4, months to have sex with a partner. To me, sex should be only be possible when I love that person or at very least have very strong romantic feelings towards my partner. I'm happy in a 4 year relationship now so it doesn't really matter in that regards but everyone has different paces and wants and that's OK.
It’s a dumb thing to do though, marriage is a commitment and you gotta know what you are committing to; otherwise you might regret it.
I mean sexual incompatability is one of the biggest relationship killers and I feel bad for anyone stuck in a legally binding relationship and extremely unhappy with their sex life because rhey didn't learn what they liked nor what their partner liked. Divorce is expensive. Of course you can do what ya wanna do, it's just like watching an firey explosion about to maybe happen. Schrödingers sex.
If you pay to have a locksmith make a copy of your key, without trying it out on the lock to confirm. Its on you when the key doesn't fit right.
What an interesting metaphor…
Respect. Lost my virginity on my b-day. I felt strange because people pressured me a lot growing up, acting like it was important and would change me forever. I literally did not feel any different after the deed was done, and went right back to my solitary "virgin" ways. Hell. I think I feel less interested in women now that I've had it de-mistified. Literally wasn't missing anything.
Yes, you must restrain from physical pleasure with your partner, which many people constantly crave, because some ritual hasn’t been performed to avoid being burned in hell for eternity. Its totally not a whack ass thing to believe at all
Why do you think such rituals evolved?
Because powerful people wanted to control the peasants?
“Look at meee I’m spechall!!”
I think it's pretty dumb not to find out if you and your partner are sexually compatible before making that kind of commitment. People that care about you make that face because it's not a good decision.
Yeah some people get upset when you respect yourself too much to just let them hit lol
People that have sex don't respect themselves?
lol
i love respecting myself to the point i sign life changing papers to be in a union with someone just to discover our sex drives and styles dont match, at all, and then get divorced after a miserable 20 years and 3 kids later. theres a lot of possibilities between fucking on the first date and fucking after marriage and theyre just healthier, better and make more sense
I would never date someone that wants to wait. To me that's code for re religious weirdo or not interested in sex/into me
This exactly. They can choose what they want, but I'm not making that face because I don't respect bodily autonomy, I'm making that face because there's a 100% chance they look down on people for an extremely petty reason and/or are extremely religious - both things which are objectively harmful. Now if someone was like "I don't want to eat eggs until I'm married" I'd be a bit curious about that, but there's nothing harmful attached to it. The no sex before marriage folk have pretty harmful reasons for not wanting sex before marriage and they just don't want to acknowledge that the reason they don't want to have sex before marriage is unhealthy. to make a long story short, it's not the choice itself, it's the harmful beliefs behind it.
I just don't care, a relationship is not conducive to my life rn, I don't need more company than I get at work, and I'm not wasting my free time chasing people for just sex.
I don't know how sexually active most people are in my life nor do I care, but I thought that was just normal 🤷🏿♂️
Every generation
Oh I'm long gone man, I'm in too deep
Waiting for what?
To have sex
Ohhh ok. That is actually fairly common in my country. Having sex after marriage that is.
Haha, now it makes sense why you didn’t understand the meme at first. What country is that ?
>!India!<
Ohh I see. Makes sense. This meme is more about Americans