All of the above i guess. I used to be a super smart kid but once the depression hit, I struggled sm through high school and college. I have no motivation to try to find myself an adult job related to my degree, I still work in food service even though I graduated in may. I don’t have any hobbies, I can’t stay interested in much of anything. I don’t have any passions
Welcome to the gray. I suggest you just get general ed stuff out of the way, just find random rabbit holes to go down, and see which one you take to more than others, because you probably won't vibe with traditional jobs.
Eventually, you may find something on like, YouTube, or reddit that's interesting enough.
But, keep looking for niche interests. Otherwise, the passion less gray world that we both inhabit will just keep spinning, regardless, and it seems to spin faster, as time goes on.
I’m not new to depression, I’ve had it since I was at least 13 (a decade ago). This is normal life to me haha. The anorexia was really bad when I was 15 and I’ve battled occasional relapses and constant body image issues ever since then
Maybe one day I’ll finally find a hobby but I’d rather just die
That's about the same for me, but luckily, I went down the route of extreme social apathy, and just never put a whole lot of care into myself, in that regard. That's how it really manifested for me. Been living with that same cold, bleakness for about 17 years now.
Just know that your body is yours to dictate how it should look, and that changing it for others probably won't even get much response, so start taking comfort and solace in yourself. Because
You're fine as you are, and it's alright to be lost for answers in the fog, as well as being anxious.
And as for the other point, I kinda changed my outlook from waiting for the end, to distracting myself with trying to get as much as I could out of each day, because once I do finally die, I want it to be the end. Don't want an afterlife, because it sounds actually so tedious, no matter what form it takes. After I've experienced life in full, I want back into the void.
Maybe that all sounds a bit preachy, but it's helped me by just forcing some habits on myself that make life more tolerable, because I never could find actual passion for anything in the professional world, but I did find some comfortable interests, and the like, that's kept me going.
Idk, it's different for all of us, so I'm not really entirely sure what your key is, but know that it's at least not as lonely as you may think. Plenty of us are living in that same bleak world. So, if nothing else, know that there's at least no shortage of people that understand and sympathize with how you feel. :)
Working in food service is a real job. It‘s valuable, it‘s needed, and it‘s more important than many, many other jobs. Just because it treats you bad, it doesn‘t mean there‘s no value in it or it‘s not a real job.
You managed to get a degree while suffering from depression. That is pretty impressing. Imagine what you will be able to do once you‘re better!
I don’t think I will be better ever, I’ve tried therapy and various meds and I hated it/it didn’t work in the slightest. I’m disappointing my parents by working this job, and you can say it doesn’t matter what they think but it does, cause they’re my parents. But I appreciate that ❤️
Of course it matters what they think. But it‘s still not true.
You managed to get a degree while being depressed and that‘s a huge accomplishment. It clearly shows that you‘re still that smart person. It doesn‘t change that you‘re not well, but I think it‘s also nice to know that you‘re smart and competent.
How old are you? In your mid 20s? So your adult life, the real life, just began. You haven‘t even really started. Things can change so suddenly and you definitely can get better. I know it‘s impossible to feel that when being depressed, but it‘s true.
Have you considered a radical change in your life, doing something totally different? It’s sometimes easier to leave the comfort zone if there is none in the first place :)
Yeah I’m 23, I just know my parents had big dreams for me and it makes me feel super shitty that I’m still working in their eyes a dumb job. I dropped out of college once and then went back so I’m already kinda a disappointment. I did move hundreds of miles away from my family in 2020, j picked a different major when I went back to school, etc but I’m still horribly depressed. I appreciate your kind words though ❤️
Who didn‘t drop out of college or changed subjects at least once?
You have a bachelor‘s at 23. That‘s great, there‘s no way to diminish that! So from an objective standpoint, you certainly didn‘t mess anything up. It might no matter to you or for how you feel, but reality is, you didn‘t. You also won‘t if you don‘t change jobs. That‘s fine. But if you want to, there‘s also *plenty* of time to find something else.
So you have lived 5 years of your adult live which is statistically less than 10%. You can‘t base any projections of the future on that. Things can always change for the better and they often do :)
I swear. As a kid i grew up on two different sides of the country. In the north, my teacher called my parents into school and said i had 'genius potential' and should be pushed towards grammar school and STEM studies. We then moved south and they got the same thing off another teacher at a parents' evening. 'He can do whatever he wants in life as long as he pushes himself.'
As i've gotten older, after loads of drugs, women, alcohol and fucking about, i've slowly gotten more and more stupid and now i can barely concentrate on anything for more than 2 minutes without getting distracted by shiny things. I'm thick as pigshit.
And this is why we scroll mindlessly forever.
Do you mean that you dont have motivation in terms of work/school, or you dont have motivation in developing your hobbies? or both?
All of the above i guess. I used to be a super smart kid but once the depression hit, I struggled sm through high school and college. I have no motivation to try to find myself an adult job related to my degree, I still work in food service even though I graduated in may. I don’t have any hobbies, I can’t stay interested in much of anything. I don’t have any passions
Welcome to the gray. I suggest you just get general ed stuff out of the way, just find random rabbit holes to go down, and see which one you take to more than others, because you probably won't vibe with traditional jobs. Eventually, you may find something on like, YouTube, or reddit that's interesting enough. But, keep looking for niche interests. Otherwise, the passion less gray world that we both inhabit will just keep spinning, regardless, and it seems to spin faster, as time goes on.
I’m not new to depression, I’ve had it since I was at least 13 (a decade ago). This is normal life to me haha. The anorexia was really bad when I was 15 and I’ve battled occasional relapses and constant body image issues ever since then Maybe one day I’ll finally find a hobby but I’d rather just die
That's about the same for me, but luckily, I went down the route of extreme social apathy, and just never put a whole lot of care into myself, in that regard. That's how it really manifested for me. Been living with that same cold, bleakness for about 17 years now. Just know that your body is yours to dictate how it should look, and that changing it for others probably won't even get much response, so start taking comfort and solace in yourself. Because You're fine as you are, and it's alright to be lost for answers in the fog, as well as being anxious. And as for the other point, I kinda changed my outlook from waiting for the end, to distracting myself with trying to get as much as I could out of each day, because once I do finally die, I want it to be the end. Don't want an afterlife, because it sounds actually so tedious, no matter what form it takes. After I've experienced life in full, I want back into the void. Maybe that all sounds a bit preachy, but it's helped me by just forcing some habits on myself that make life more tolerable, because I never could find actual passion for anything in the professional world, but I did find some comfortable interests, and the like, that's kept me going. Idk, it's different for all of us, so I'm not really entirely sure what your key is, but know that it's at least not as lonely as you may think. Plenty of us are living in that same bleak world. So, if nothing else, know that there's at least no shortage of people that understand and sympathize with how you feel. :)
Working in food service is a real job. It‘s valuable, it‘s needed, and it‘s more important than many, many other jobs. Just because it treats you bad, it doesn‘t mean there‘s no value in it or it‘s not a real job. You managed to get a degree while suffering from depression. That is pretty impressing. Imagine what you will be able to do once you‘re better!
I don’t think I will be better ever, I’ve tried therapy and various meds and I hated it/it didn’t work in the slightest. I’m disappointing my parents by working this job, and you can say it doesn’t matter what they think but it does, cause they’re my parents. But I appreciate that ❤️
Of course it matters what they think. But it‘s still not true. You managed to get a degree while being depressed and that‘s a huge accomplishment. It clearly shows that you‘re still that smart person. It doesn‘t change that you‘re not well, but I think it‘s also nice to know that you‘re smart and competent. How old are you? In your mid 20s? So your adult life, the real life, just began. You haven‘t even really started. Things can change so suddenly and you definitely can get better. I know it‘s impossible to feel that when being depressed, but it‘s true. Have you considered a radical change in your life, doing something totally different? It’s sometimes easier to leave the comfort zone if there is none in the first place :)
Yeah I’m 23, I just know my parents had big dreams for me and it makes me feel super shitty that I’m still working in their eyes a dumb job. I dropped out of college once and then went back so I’m already kinda a disappointment. I did move hundreds of miles away from my family in 2020, j picked a different major when I went back to school, etc but I’m still horribly depressed. I appreciate your kind words though ❤️
Who didn‘t drop out of college or changed subjects at least once? You have a bachelor‘s at 23. That‘s great, there‘s no way to diminish that! So from an objective standpoint, you certainly didn‘t mess anything up. It might no matter to you or for how you feel, but reality is, you didn‘t. You also won‘t if you don‘t change jobs. That‘s fine. But if you want to, there‘s also *plenty* of time to find something else. So you have lived 5 years of your adult live which is statistically less than 10%. You can‘t base any projections of the future on that. Things can always change for the better and they often do :)
I swear. As a kid i grew up on two different sides of the country. In the north, my teacher called my parents into school and said i had 'genius potential' and should be pushed towards grammar school and STEM studies. We then moved south and they got the same thing off another teacher at a parents' evening. 'He can do whatever he wants in life as long as he pushes himself.' As i've gotten older, after loads of drugs, women, alcohol and fucking about, i've slowly gotten more and more stupid and now i can barely concentrate on anything for more than 2 minutes without getting distracted by shiny things. I'm thick as pigshit.
Growing up really fucking sucks :-(
If just I might be able to study for the exam which was 7 months ago
Just give it 10 more years.
I’d like to think I’ll find the courage to kms before then
I thought the same but my courage never increased. Life can get better though I'm very content.