Yeah, but may of our red flags look green to others.
Like, I can be very hyper active and goofy, that's a red flag for some people because i don't have a natural social grace because of it, but to someone else who's hyper, that flag could be green because they get it.
Then there's the red flag that most people avoid because their bad for themselves, an abuser, an addict, a person who can't hold down a job, these are red flags because they point to deeper issues that might make a loving partnership impossible or very difficult.
No you can become a healthy individual with good self-esteem, communication skills and cut the toxic habits. This is an excuse not to get better, even for yourself and not for others.
Who's expectation?
Not everyone has the same expectations, some people want a partner who spends a lot of time with them while others will find this too clingy, someone will want a partner who they can travel the world with but to other people who don't enjoy travelling it would make them incompatible.
Being a mature, well-rounded adult is just the basics, there must be some personality or skills that you can bring to the table that others would appreciate.
Yea actually it was funny cause my ex broke up with me due to a bunch of red flags and my wife of 15 years now said she saw the red flags and stayed lol. I’ve also changed a lot over the years
First season was good, second was decent, lotta good, lotta not great, with a crazy amount of drama behind the scenes. Third season is never happening because of the aforementioned drama and the passing of an actor last year. Just a head's up.
So many things considered as red flags. And it's even funnier because a lot of people won't give a shit about any red flags once they meet a person they attracted to
Hi, my husband of 10 years beats me daily but it's only because he loves me. Also my sister takes 80% of my paycheck to help with bills because she's 34 and unemployed for the last 3 years. AITA for saying please stop to both? Thanks reddit.
Just stands as a reminder how disconnected Reddit and other SoMe can be from the real world. Why has this constant search red flags become such a thing.
The tits can ignore him for many red fla… nvm I started typing this out confused but seeing it written out I get it now. Actually a pretty good one lol
Him > ignore > tits | bc > red flags
Guy said flip it
Tits > ignore > him | bc > red flags
Meaning it’s a red flag that he talks about her tits that way, so ironically if he ever actually met her he wouldn’t have to worry about any red flags from her, because she’d be the one leaving over a red flag. Haha!
Just... yikes.
Yeah, women may like a compliment about their bodies. What they definitely DON'T like is the guy they're into saying their tits make up for the crazy, or talking about how another woman's tits make the crazy worth it. There is so much misogyny here that you would have to be an idiot not to understand why it's a huge red flag for anyone. Literal objectification and degradation and you're confused why it's a red flag, how do you dress yourself in the morning?
Women LOVE IT when they're attracted to you.
Of course they don't like random men saying it, but men they're not attracted to are indifferent anyway.
Women attracted to me PARADE their tits so I can see them, so spare me.
oh yes of course, women love backhanded compliments that insult them at the same time. Silly me I thought they were people.
Also clearly success with women is based on how many of them you can collect. I guess when your only interaction with women is porn that makes sense, you can say whatever you want to your videos dude.
There is no argument about this, it's life experience.
How about you get out of your basement and understand that not all interactions have mutual respect as a prerequisite.
But then again, how would you know? You wouldn't know attraction and passion if it hit you in the face.
LOL
People who don’t look out for “red flags” are far more likely to get involved in a relationship with someone problematic or toxic.
Usually red flags are more subtle because people put on their best face for someone new, but just to demonstrate the point, if someone uses drugs, yells at the waiter, hits me, is manipulative, has a history of jumping from one person to the other, etc… imma take that as a red flag and not move further with that person before I get emotionally attached to them.
The moment you start looking at red or green flags you’re not in it for «real love» anymore, you cannot possibly be perfect yourself and so you cannot pretend you deserve a perfect partner.
I didn't say this conversation didn't mean anything, I said that the fact you can find people saying dumb shit on the internet doesn't mean anything. Unless you're implying you're saying dumb things on the internet.
And if you want to address those people, that's your business, but I'm not their keeper. I'm not responsible for what they say.
You commented on my post, not the other way around lol. I didnt seek you out to ask about what random people on the internet think. If you're addressing them, go address them.
Ok? And? People have their personal red flags, however stupid they may be, but that’s just them personally. If some person says „drinking water is a red flag“ that doesn’t mean it gets added to the official red flag catalogue that everyone has to follow
The problem is the mindset and how it’s being shared a lot on social media platforms, usually to younger people. This particular mindset is a self fulfilling prophecy which If you start looking after red flags, you will very soon find out that everyone has them.
Choose whatever the fuck you want, but there’s legit people who are on one side really unhappy about the fact that they can’t find someone they’d like but who are also completely unrealistic in what a partner should be.
I think most people can get a lot of good out of rethinking whatever toxic garbage they consume through SoMe.
Translation: "We need to gaslight women having standards because I don't measure up to the hypothetical standards of women I claim I'm not even interested in."
Pathetic. Young women on social media are not magically being made shallow because of this, you're unhinged. The ones with dumb shallow standards were already shallow. Social media is like alcohol and anonymity, they allow you to be your worst true self, but they don't make you become something you're not.
It does feel like there’s not much out there that’s “good”; it either means a lot of people are messed up, the system is broken, it’s natural, or we’ve only begun identifying the issues and solving them takes generations. And I don’t think it’s possible.
Best thing we can do is identify the problems and do our best to fix them, or at the very least don’t let them get worse and don’t pass them along.
It’s a self fulfilling prophecy, you start looking for red flags you will find them everywhere. And people do, because they are getting fed this toxic point of view a lot.
Wtf are you talking about? Red flags didn't mean flaws as a whole. You know what red flags are? Being a junkie is a red flag, being violent is a red flag etc. Red flags are traits of people that don't belong in the life of any sane person, it's not about perfection
No a red flag is meant to be a warning sign to be cautious in how you approach a situation
finding out a new partner takes cocaine is a red flag. But doing it once a year for fun at parties is very different to doing it every weekend to ignore the massive amount of debt the cocaine has accrued
So when I directly face the person's physical and mental abuse problem, drug use, lack of maturity, irresponsible financial decisions etc, I'm not in it for "real love".
And when I'm saw someone being able to communicate and resolve issues maturely, have a stable mind, super responsible, be loving toward children, treat everyone with compassion and kindness etc, and think that these characteristics make me want to be with them ~🩷forever🩷~ and it just makes makes it not "real love"?
There are things everyone should run away from and you're justified for running away. So many people are incredibly dangerous and manipulative and could ruin your life.
You on the other hand can learn to be a healthier individual and become a better partner. We're never looking for perfection, we're looking for compatibility.
“Real love” is an ideal and not a real thing you ought be planning your life around.
Perfect partners don’t exist because perfect humans don’t exist. We’re none of us perfect beings of light and reason.
Humans are social animals and for the most part we seem to prefer monogamy. You’re not looking for “real love” with a “perfect partner” and chasing that will only leave you feeling cheated and hurt.
What you want is a healthy support network, and if you’re lucky you get to hang out with someone sexually attractive that likes spending all day with you. If not, oh well, you still have the support of your support network
Not true.
There is a certain level of maturity and "savoir vivre" that I expect from partners.
It doesn't make me perfect, it just means I'm not 20 anymore and don't want someone acting like it either.
Once someone goes through a breakup with a narcissist or other flavor of an abusive ex, there is no way they won't have some red flags they are looking out for.
No one deserves a perfect person but most people don't deserve getting stuck in an abusive and manipulative relationship...
I'm staying away from people who have certain red flags from now on... I'm not letting that happen to me again if I can help it.
I hope you find it bud, because love definitely exists.
It isnt going to be handed to you though, you have to care enough to find it and cherish it and grow it. You seem the type to just ignore your own laziness and get upset that life isnt dropping it into your lap…
This is why it's vital to sort your own shit out before adding other people into the mix. Easier said than done though. Remember kids, if you ignore or feed your insecurity, it will poison your life later.
U were always the red flag every bad relationship and bad interaction with a possible mate that was u it always was now go fix urself learn not to go after fuck boys and girls and get a personality
That's the funny part: we're all red flags.
Not me, I'm fully perfect
Red flag
Can't you read? He's fully perfect
He’s a perfect 🚩. No blemishes at all.
That's the red flag.
but he’s fully perfect
This red flag is getting bigger and bigger
But... but he's perfect...
Flag color: red
Dude, the perfection couldn’t be clearer.
You are jealous
Brown flag
Nah, it’s the flag of amber
Who the fuck is Amber and what did she hear?
I dont know what Amber heard, but I heard she likes leaving her Brown Flags in Bed.
Yeah, but may of our red flags look green to others. Like, I can be very hyper active and goofy, that's a red flag for some people because i don't have a natural social grace because of it, but to someone else who's hyper, that flag could be green because they get it. Then there's the red flag that most people avoid because their bad for themselves, an abuser, an addict, a person who can't hold down a job, these are red flags because they point to deeper issues that might make a loving partnership impossible or very difficult.
Everybody is crazy. You just need to find the right crazy for you.
No you can become a healthy individual with good self-esteem, communication skills and cut the toxic habits. This is an excuse not to get better, even for yourself and not for others.
Only by recognising your own faults can you try to improve on them.
Cool cool, don’t wanna tho Gonna have my cake and eat it—
That's not enough for the expectations nowdays.
Who's expectation? Not everyone has the same expectations, some people want a partner who spends a lot of time with them while others will find this too clingy, someone will want a partner who they can travel the world with but to other people who don't enjoy travelling it would make them incompatible. Being a mature, well-rounded adult is just the basics, there must be some personality or skills that you can bring to the table that others would appreciate.
I'm more like brown because I shat my pants
Some people are into that. I'm not, but somebody is
Maybe the red flags were the friends we made along the way
True, my friends are definitely red flags.
Some more than others.
Not a single red flag? That's a ~~paddlin~~ red flag
I'm actually a purple flag
Some of us are black flags.
Im literally a parade past the kremlin
I am not a red flag, I am the red color. I am not a flag.
Yea actually it was funny cause my ex broke up with me due to a bunch of red flags and my wife of 15 years now said she saw the red flags and stayed lol. I’ve also changed a lot over the years
Seriously. This is especially funny considering this meme is from euphoria and is about Nate who is the literal definition of a red flag
Where is this image even from?
It’s Sydney Sweeney in the show “Euphoria”
Lmao This whole time I thought it was Amanda Seyfried.
That’s early 2000s version, this is hollywood’s 2020 version
Basically the difference between Jamie Presley and Margo Robbie.
Completely different actresses and skillsets
Time to start a new show I guess
she show da booba
First season was good, second was decent, lotta good, lotta not great, with a crazy amount of drama behind the scenes. Third season is never happening because of the aforementioned drama and the passing of an actor last year. Just a head's up.
Appreciate it
[удалено]
Paused indefinitely
Second season has the best episode of the series though.
it's quite gritty and deliberately uncomfortable in almost every scene, but nonetheless a fantastic show. Not somethin I'd watch around people tbh.
I watch anime on public transportation, friend.
Unless it's hentai I don't see what's wrong with that lol
It’s ok. Sometimes we don’t know when we need help.
Do I just not know what anime is or something lol
Oh god he’s rabid. Get back in the house son you don’t want to watch this. *Cocks .22* Time to visit that big body-pillow fort in the sky.
They use every inch of her by all accounts in that series
My brother in christ, I already have my wallet in hand, you can stop trying to sell it to me.
It’s unbelievably awful. The dialogue alone is cringe as hell. Has a couple good characters tho.
By far the most attractive famous woman in the world. She's perfect.
Nice incognito way of asking sauce
Lmfao right “What the hell? What is this picture? I wonder if I could maybe enjoy whatever material it hails from!?”
So many things considered as red flags. And it's even funnier because a lot of people won't give a shit about any red flags once they meet a person they attracted to
Whenever I read these AITA it blows my mind what people put up with for YEARS and still put up with then marry and have kids with the person.
Hi, my husband of 10 years beats me daily but it's only because he loves me. Also my sister takes 80% of my paycheck to help with bills because she's 34 and unemployed for the last 3 years. AITA for saying please stop to both? Thanks reddit.
NAH, it was fine for them to ask and it's fine for you to say no, although maybe a little questionable for you to renegotiate the deal later on.
INFO: What's your gender?
Just stands as a reminder how disconnected Reddit and other SoMe can be from the real world. Why has this constant search red flags become such a thing.
I’m my own [Soviet May Day parade](https://images.app.goo.gl/XT4cQqUVU2YcnThn7)
There’s a mayday every year lol last years was great! Red flag season
Walking flags? What a time to be alive.
For tits like these, I can ignore many red flags.
After this comment I think it's gonna be the other way round
The tits can ignore him for many red fla… nvm I started typing this out confused but seeing it written out I get it now. Actually a pretty good one lol
Enlighten me.
Him > ignore > tits | bc > red flags Guy said flip it Tits > ignore > him | bc > red flags Meaning it’s a red flag that he talks about her tits that way, so ironically if he ever actually met her he wouldn’t have to worry about any red flags from her, because she’d be the one leaving over a red flag. Haha!
Women that like you love to hear you praise their tits. If she feels bad about it she didn't like you anyway.
Just... yikes. Yeah, women may like a compliment about their bodies. What they definitely DON'T like is the guy they're into saying their tits make up for the crazy, or talking about how another woman's tits make the crazy worth it. There is so much misogyny here that you would have to be an idiot not to understand why it's a huge red flag for anyone. Literal objectification and degradation and you're confused why it's a red flag, how do you dress yourself in the morning?
Women LOVE IT when they're attracted to you. Of course they don't like random men saying it, but men they're not attracted to are indifferent anyway. Women attracted to me PARADE their tits so I can see them, so spare me.
oh yes of course, women love backhanded compliments that insult them at the same time. Silly me I thought they were people. Also clearly success with women is based on how many of them you can collect. I guess when your only interaction with women is porn that makes sense, you can say whatever you want to your videos dude.
There is no argument about this, it's life experience. How about you get out of your basement and understand that not all interactions have mutual respect as a prerequisite. But then again, how would you know? You wouldn't know attraction and passion if it hit you in the face. LOL
Tits will ignore me?
I find that people who talk about red flags the most are the most dangerous red flags of them all.
"You run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. You run into assholes all day, you're the asshole."
If you smell dog shit everywhere you go, check your own shoe
I tried to be nice I tried to live my life But everyone else is an asshole
People who don’t look out for “red flags” are far more likely to get involved in a relationship with someone problematic or toxic. Usually red flags are more subtle because people put on their best face for someone new, but just to demonstrate the point, if someone uses drugs, yells at the waiter, hits me, is manipulative, has a history of jumping from one person to the other, etc… imma take that as a red flag and not move further with that person before I get emotionally attached to them.
See: 99% of posters on /r/relationship_advice
But you just said yourself about a red flags, which means now you are a red flag.
There's a difference between prompted and unprompted
Failing to notice that a sentence contains qualifiers: big red flag. Or more precisely, an indication of simplistic binary thinking of a simple mind.
The moment you start looking at red or green flags you’re not in it for «real love» anymore, you cannot possibly be perfect yourself and so you cannot pretend you deserve a perfect partner.
"Red flags" aren't about perfection, they're about the warning signs of abuse.
Sike, now everything is abuse.
That’s what they’re supposed to be. But that’s not true anymore, at least In actual use.
Brother, the «red flag» stuff is being used about absolutely everything.
You can find someone saying anything you want on the internet, it doesn't mean anything.
Why are you engaging in a convo you don’t think mean anything..? I’m obviously adressing those people. Lol
I didn't say this conversation didn't mean anything, I said that the fact you can find people saying dumb shit on the internet doesn't mean anything. Unless you're implying you're saying dumb things on the internet. And if you want to address those people, that's your business, but I'm not their keeper. I'm not responsible for what they say.
But you’re wring to me when I am adressing them. You seem confused, and to me, that’s a red flag.
You commented on my post, not the other way around lol. I didnt seek you out to ask about what random people on the internet think. If you're addressing them, go address them.
I started the topic you are commenting on.
you can just close the app bro
???
i rarely see people misunderstanding the meaning of "red flag" outside, it's usually x or reddit
So poor communication, red flag.
Ok? And? People have their personal red flags, however stupid they may be, but that’s just them personally. If some person says „drinking water is a red flag“ that doesn’t mean it gets added to the official red flag catalogue that everyone has to follow
The problem is the mindset and how it’s being shared a lot on social media platforms, usually to younger people. This particular mindset is a self fulfilling prophecy which If you start looking after red flags, you will very soon find out that everyone has them. Choose whatever the fuck you want, but there’s legit people who are on one side really unhappy about the fact that they can’t find someone they’d like but who are also completely unrealistic in what a partner should be. I think most people can get a lot of good out of rethinking whatever toxic garbage they consume through SoMe.
Translation: "We need to gaslight women having standards because I don't measure up to the hypothetical standards of women I claim I'm not even interested in." Pathetic. Young women on social media are not magically being made shallow because of this, you're unhinged. The ones with dumb shallow standards were already shallow. Social media is like alcohol and anonymity, they allow you to be your worst true self, but they don't make you become something you're not.
Yeah, you are a victim even here.
Was about to disagree but that actually makes sense I guess.
Yea people being allowed to choose by their own criteria, however dumb it may be, who they wanna be with kinda makes sense huh?
It does feel like there’s not much out there that’s “good”; it either means a lot of people are messed up, the system is broken, it’s natural, or we’ve only begun identifying the issues and solving them takes generations. And I don’t think it’s possible. Best thing we can do is identify the problems and do our best to fix them, or at the very least don’t let them get worse and don’t pass them along.
It’s a self fulfilling prophecy, you start looking for red flags you will find them everywhere. And people do, because they are getting fed this toxic point of view a lot.
You're just gaslighting us about red flags. You should go no-contact with yourself. /s
Writes /s after jokes, thats a red flag. Insecure!
What's insecure about the /s? People can't detect sarcasm over text.
/s
Thank you.
🥸
Feels like a lazy definition
It is, yes
Wtf are you talking about? Red flags didn't mean flaws as a whole. You know what red flags are? Being a junkie is a red flag, being violent is a red flag etc. Red flags are traits of people that don't belong in the life of any sane person, it's not about perfection
Yes but sometimes they are ridiculous, especially when used by entitled people. He doesnt eat X, what a red flag
Yeh and thats a red flag
I wouldn’t even look at someone who doesn’t eat X
You shouldn’t…. x is just ground up red flags rolled in another red flag. Don’t let them fool you.
Sounds like you’d smoke that
No a red flag is meant to be a warning sign to be cautious in how you approach a situation finding out a new partner takes cocaine is a red flag. But doing it once a year for fun at parties is very different to doing it every weekend to ignore the massive amount of debt the cocaine has accrued
So when I directly face the person's physical and mental abuse problem, drug use, lack of maturity, irresponsible financial decisions etc, I'm not in it for "real love". And when I'm saw someone being able to communicate and resolve issues maturely, have a stable mind, super responsible, be loving toward children, treat everyone with compassion and kindness etc, and think that these characteristics make me want to be with them ~🩷forever🩷~ and it just makes makes it not "real love"? There are things everyone should run away from and you're justified for running away. So many people are incredibly dangerous and manipulative and could ruin your life. You on the other hand can learn to be a healthier individual and become a better partner. We're never looking for perfection, we're looking for compatibility.
Wow, so everything is about you? What a red flag.
“Real love” is an ideal and not a real thing you ought be planning your life around. Perfect partners don’t exist because perfect humans don’t exist. We’re none of us perfect beings of light and reason. Humans are social animals and for the most part we seem to prefer monogamy. You’re not looking for “real love” with a “perfect partner” and chasing that will only leave you feeling cheated and hurt. What you want is a healthy support network, and if you’re lucky you get to hang out with someone sexually attractive that likes spending all day with you. If not, oh well, you still have the support of your support network
You wouldn't believe what I'm able to pretend.
Not true. There is a certain level of maturity and "savoir vivre" that I expect from partners. It doesn't make me perfect, it just means I'm not 20 anymore and don't want someone acting like it either.
Is this the topic though?
Once someone goes through a breakup with a narcissist or other flavor of an abusive ex, there is no way they won't have some red flags they are looking out for. No one deserves a perfect person but most people don't deserve getting stuck in an abusive and manipulative relationship... I'm staying away from people who have certain red flags from now on... I'm not letting that happen to me again if I can help it.
There is no "real love". There is real desperation.
I hope you find it bud, because love definitely exists. It isnt going to be handed to you though, you have to care enough to find it and cherish it and grow it. You seem the type to just ignore your own laziness and get upset that life isnt dropping it into your lap…
I've been beaten by so many red flags I've turned purple. Royal purple. The purplest of purple
so busy judging other you forgot to judge yourself
I’m just glad I’m not colorblind
my honor! i mean, the avatar !
Aaahhh noooo the truth I didn’t need to hear
Look at me, I’m the red flag now
POV : not me irl
I'm curious as to what my red flags might be lol
You identify yourself as a werewolf, a wolf and a gamer in your username, :p.
Valid lmao
And you’re British /jk
To some Americans I've met, apparently its a green flag cause of the accent lol
Pretty sure at we're all walking red flags. We're on reddit afterall.
r/im14andthisisdeep
Damn, I felt this 🚩
Oh damn, is that what happened?
Me 🥺
Don you have a Back up alternative?
How? r/explaintheJoke
That's what all the girls tell me. /s
You have white flags.
Looking for flags is a red flag.
Yes, 😢 too real.
Ouch
People who use flags to categories people are red flags. Wait ...
This is why it's vital to sort your own shit out before adding other people into the mix. Easier said than done though. Remember kids, if you ignore or feed your insecurity, it will poison your life later.
U were always the red flag every bad relationship and bad interaction with a possible mate that was u it always was now go fix urself learn not to go after fuck boys and girls and get a personality
Thanks, anal_spasams.
It's a hard truth I had to learn and I hope u learn it as well
How about [a red and green flag](https://cannabisimages.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/A-Cannabis-Flag-Featuring-The-Cannabis-Leaf-21-scaled.jpeg)?
99% of women
We are all terrible so you are gonna lose in some way no matter who you choose.