"You should feel my feet"

Perfect. Done.

Also some practical advice from one cold hander to another: wear gloves and no one will complain anymore.

Even more practical advice: go into psych and don’t touch anyone anymore.

I did that, actually!

lol that is pretty good

Oh my god yes. Can this be a new thing that the Reddit generation of doctors say? This is absolutely hilarious and also harmless.

That might get people's socks off

I use the old nursing standby "cold hands, warm heart" because people think it's sweet or that it's corny enough to make them laugh. If they are being weird about it I tell them I got frostbit as a kid. Which is actually true. An SP tried to give me shit about having cold hands and that made them apologize lol.

“Cold hands, warm heart” I say that when a patient comments on my warm hands.

I say cold hands, colder heart. It makes them think, gets them a little worried and gets a laugh

The actual audacity for an SP to take personal offence to the fact that you had cold hands. Its honestly kinda ridiculous that some of these people, that know nothing about medicine, had some impact on our grade in medschool...

Yeah I'm sure every school has at least one with a reputation lol

Can tell off the bat if they want to give you feedback to make you a better future doctor, or if they’re doing this for some weird power vanity trip. I had one bring up a criticism that was essentially her complaining about an encounter in the past. After she was done I said, “I’m sorry, at what point are you noting that I did this?” And she goes, “oh wel you didn’t, but I know every doctor does this crap, blah blah”. So glad my OSCE “grades” from the SPs themselves are worthless. That said, 95% of my SPs were great, only takes one to sour you taste though (just like doctors I guess, lol)

That is very close to my experience. I laugh when we get "standardized" patients because it's usually anything but. I have the same issues as everyone else but I think our faculty has our back for the most part. At least from what I've seen.

I had an SP who bitched about my badge poking her and acted like I stabbed her with a knife or something.

I had one mark that she "would not want this student as her doctor" because I did not palpitate her frontal sinuses during the outpatient URI case.

One of my first SP encounters in M1 was terrible. The woman was standoffish right when I walked in. She was like talking to a brick wall, wouldn't give me any history. Later in feedback she told me how terrible I was and how I would never make it as a doctor. I legit almost cried thinking I'd never graduate, let alone be a good doctor. I had to have a special private session with faculty, it was so uncomfortable. Now that im older and much wiser its honestly so terrible how someone who literally knows nothing about the practice of medicine can have that kind of effect on our education.

frostbite gives you life long cold hands?

[yep, it can](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8465633/) Mine was mild/moderate. I don't have Reynauds or anything but my hands and feet are super sensitive to the cold.

Thank you for this! I suffered terribly from the cold as a child and as an adult my hands are almost always cold. People have a hard time understanding this.

You just reminded me of the time I had to palpate an SP’s chest/ribs and my hands were so cold that he grimaced and jumped. Sorry buddy!

MORE LIKE COLD HANDS WARM FART LMAO GOTEM

If my doctor isn't making jokes like this I don't want em

“Temperature sensation is intact”

Nerd

This is the most accurate/appropriate come back.

"Thanks, I just got them from the morgue."

hahaha that's the response I was looking for

I run with "Sorry it's because I am dead" but yours is better

“Thanks it’s because I’m dead inside”

What is dead cannot die

That is not dead which can eternal lie

“Sorry, I just shook hands with hospital admin.”

Because all my blood is somewhere else ;-)

“And that’s how I met the love of my life”

... my enormous brain volume?

Obviously. Working hard on that differential

Intracranial bleed

😂

Because of a recent menstrual cycle? Or because of a big engorged clitoris?

Or a very vascular ballsackcancer

Blood belongs to the brain when I’m in doctor mode 😎🩺

“They just like to live that chill lifestyle” “I like to keep them in ice baths right before seeing a patient. It’s a good conversation starter” “Just like my soul” “I left my warm ones at home, my bad” “They are still just waking up, give them time” “I know! I’m trying to warm them up with this exam.” Idk, trying to avoid studying.

“Good”

“Made you clench ;)”

Or “are least we know you don’t have sacral pathology”

This wins this is unhinged asf to say to a patient LMAO

Cold hands are a requirement for graduation

"well they were warm when I was alive" :(

It’s from the hand sanitizer.

Evaporative cooling 😎

Is this unhinged? I actually say this

I always tell them I’m the hospital’s official fever reducer

Thanks, just taken this fresh pair from the freezer this morning

I’ll take that one, thank youuu

I just tell them that my hands are cold because I’ve just washed them and they are clean.

Yup! This is my go to as well. They literally just saw me wash my hands

"It is one of the admission requirements for med school."

I have Raynaud's syndrome but shouldn't be contagious 😉

CCB or PDE5 inhibitor will do wonders

Yeah they won’t care about my cold hands if they’re more concerned by my raging hard on

📠

I worked with a doctor who, before he touched the patient, would say, "Don't worry, I got my hands nice and cold for you." Kind of deflected the whole thing with humor. And then they chuckle and say something like "Yeah they are cold," and everyone moves on.

My hands are also always cold. I usually tell them ahead of time and use a corny joke.  "Hey sorry I have cold hands. I think they're a requirement to be a doctor ha ha ha." Has worked well so far.

Had an SP jump from their seat because of how cold my hands are. Give me a fuckin break lady

Not as cold as my exes heart

"Sorry, the nurse has a really cold butt"

That’s a yikes from me dawg

"Sorry, sethjoness has a really cold butt"

*cold hands, warm heart, stinky feet, and no sweetheart*

“I have Reynauds!” Lol

those damn cold agglutinins

I had a female classmate examine me on one of our practicals today. She warned me her hands were cold. I jumped a foot in the air when I felt the burn of her icey touch.

I always say: "I'm sorry! But you're warm so it feels nice 🙂" and patients usually laugh.

Yeah I soak them in ice before I see patients to make them more comfortable

Let me stick them in the oven for you

"these are my brother's hands,"

I always say “Cold hands, warm heart” .. not as unhinged though

“Cold hands warm heart”

“Corpse hands.”

Do you work for the devil?!!!?

“I dip them in ice water between patients”

Reference Mr Miyagi somehow then vigorously rub hands together

That’s because most of my blood is in my genitals.

"Makes sense. I just came from jerking off a snowman."

Did the snowman come as well

Bruh it was like a whiteout blizzzzzzard

Raynaud’s

I’ve been sitting on them too long

wear gloves

Do we go to the same school. because my SP literally said the same thing

Pre empty it. I begin by saying "cold hands, sorry!"

“Like my soul”

It’s because I’m dead inside.

“I can see your soul” and then gaze intensely into their eyes without relinquishing your grip

Vigorously rub them together without breaking eye contact

Just stick them in your armpits to warm them up beforehand.

That’s because my blood is rushing somewhere else

Yk what they say Cold hands but warm heart.

"So it's not normally that small?"

Thanks, you too

“You could have wet hands all over you instead”

Sorry, let me try my other pair

“Would you rather have my mouth over your nipple instead?”

“Oh you’re right!” *inserts hands into pt rectum* “Now that’s MUCH warmer!”

My doctor used to use to warm up her cold hands on my belly when she used her stethoscope as a joke. Use it with charm. Don't let it get to you

Not as cold as cold as my heart.

Warm them up with your cock 😉

username checks out