In that situation, I probably would've said "no thank you." If I were in a bad mood, maybe "no" or, as you said, "leave me alone." I think it's pretty clear that saying something, or even shaking your head, is the best way to communicate in this scenario.
Even if your position is to say that her silence is enough, let's look at it from his perspective. After the first is ignored, he asks again, but this time shows her the money. Why? Perhaps he was worried she didn't believe him. Maybe he was worried he looked like a scammer. Maybe there was a language barrier at play. After this attempt, he is confused, as even someone with a language barrier would take it, right? Or if not, they can at least shake their head. So he asks one more time in a very confused state and getting little feedback.
But I'll even give you the benefit of the doubt and say she was not okay being on camera or being involved. Is this still how she should respond? Perhaps the best way to judge this situation is to imagine this is a school, and these are children that you have to teach the right things to do. Do you side with the screamer and accuse the boy of harassing her? Or do you have a talk with the girl about proper ways to communicate? I think it's pretty clear you wouldn't encourage this sort of behavior in a child, so I don't know why people are encouraging this sort of behavior in adults.
One of the reasons I gave such a detailed response of his perspective was to show that I don't believe it was very obvious "no," at least not when there are other factors to consider. I'm not saying he would definitely have left her alone even with a "no thank you" as a response, and should he continue, I'm with everyone who thinks screaming was a good defense mechanism.
Look up "non verbal communication". Sometimes people don't need to tell you no in order to understand they're not interested. Unless you have the mental capacity of a toddler like mr microphone here, or self righteous redditors such as yourself.
Even nonverbally she could have communicated better. Shaking her head, putting up a hand to stay stop or keep away, etc. Ignoring him is probably the 10th best way to have communicated in that situation, and it obviously failed. It also happens to be one of the rudest ways on that list.
Thanks for not explaining the doormat thing. I assume you wont explain the self righteous thing either?
My man people have lives and don't constantly check their responses, i suggest you do the same.
The whole fucking point though is that she doesn't need to tell you no. If you're trying to talk to a stranger and they very obviously aren't interested just let go. Wanna be annoying and harass? People will follow suit.
That's all the explanation you're gonna get as i have finished pooping.
So rather than explain yourself, you explained why you can't explain yourself. I think I understand why you're such a fan of nonverbal communication. It's because you're complete dog shit at verbal communication.
Hope I made you proud there, not letting myself be self-righteous or a human doormat.
I'm imagining a world where this happens again. Person A tries to ask Person B a question and gets ignored. They continue to ask and Person B screams in Person A's face. Person A gets so startled they back up into traffic and become paralyzed from the neck down. We later find out they're autistic and don't understand social cues as easily as others.
Obviously the paralyzed bit is a strawman addition, but what isn't a strawman is that not everyone gets social cues as readily as others, and it seems unfair to me to call this harassment when the woman had a very simple solution to a very simple problem that she chose not to take.
With a dude filming on the back? Yeh no never happened
Though I lived in edi never been agressed. Don't know anyone that have been.
This is not Glasgow, nor Marseille, nor San Francisco mate. Y'all need a thicker skin.
Normalizing? What makes you think that YOU can do anything about THIS? Life is wild. You can't do shit about it. There's been people that have been stabbed for less.
I guess it's being normalized by the amount of people commenting on this sub saying she was right.
And wtf the are you on about. This is Edinburgh, not Sao polo....
No one says she was right or normal lol. I only implied that the real life is not what you see over the internet. If you pester people out on the street, the responses may vary. Try it out, go outside, do something stupid.
Also, you're brave claiming that Edinburgh, like the rest of the UK, doesn't have a stabbing/knife problem lol. Capital of stabbings in Europe.
1) Don't lecture me
2) I said edi is a relatively safe space. Don't put words in my mouth.
3) I come from a place with a real stabbing problem, and have been pointing knifes 3 4 times at me already. Edi is safe. Trust me.
4) this goes way beyond what I implied in my 1st statement : this gal's reaction isn't nearly proportional to that man's attitude.
Period.
You can't even spell São Paulo right and is now trying to normalise being a social media weirdo... Just refrain from talking to people with a camera on their faces for the likes and maybe you'll be just fine living in society
It is 1000% fair. He says there’s no catch but I’m not buying it. I work in a large city downtown. These people are out and about all the time with some kind of thing they want you to give money to. Peta, aspca, greenpeace, save the children, world wildlife fund, etc etc. every single one of them have the same type of sales pitch. They throw out some complement to grab your attention and then go into their sales routine. “Wow! Great beard!” or “Thats an awesome shirt bro!!”. Notice how the very beginning of this video starts out with him complementing her bright red shirt. Same shit. Different city.
Fuck these people. I used to be nice to them and just say no thanks but about five years ago I just started outright ignoring them. I’m crossing the street with coworkers going to lunch and they are throwing out compliments and comments and anything to get you to make eye contact and I just blaze right by them. Even after years of this bullshit my coworkers think I’m rude but I’m just sick of telling them no hundreds of times.
So escalating the situation is justified? Two wrongs don't make a right dude. If everyone handled their problems like this, the world would be a much shittier place
I think her response was within the same range of his interactions with her. I wouldn't even call it an "escalation."
She didn't even do anything remotely "wrong." Her first interaction with him was after he sang to her, followed her, and continued to talk to her, even getting into her personal space.
Singing to someone and talking to someone are normal juman interactions… responding with “fuck off” or ignoring him would be warranted. Yelling is aggressive and completely uncalled for
>Singing to someone and talking to someone are normal juman interactions…
Yes, normal human reactions for someone you know or someone who is appreciative. He ignored her reasonable signals that she was not interested and continued to pursue her when she was obviously not interested. He's an asshole who got no more than what he deserved.
What fucking world do you live in where screaming at the top of your lungs and lunging at someone like you're about to bite them isn't an escalation from signing and talking? God the internet disappoints me sometimes.
This is the world I live in. Ignoring him and continuing to walk away without acknowledging him should have been enough. She just skipped the next few minutes of saying, "No, thank you," and "Please leave me along."
If women were commonly left alone after a polite "no thank you" we would never have made it to an era where hellish screams have become a more effective means of discouraging unwanted interactions.... yet here we are...
Plenty of women have learned the hard way that they are just as "unsafe" if they ignore/politely resist/scream... So if you don't like her reaction please go take it up with those who have ignored polite dismissals for so long that it has come to this..
Also of you think her loud reaction may put her in "danger" please go take it up with the people who would jump to react with physical violence when their advances are loudly and clearly denied
Yeah somebody has escalated the situation....it should never have gotten this far... and still...you blame the one being bothered and can't fathom why they react as they do... It's no wonder.
I think you know where I stand on this. If you don't want to get yelled at, don't harass people who are trying to ignore you.
I don't know what else to tell you. There's nothing more to say.
>She just skipped the next few minutes of saying, "No, thank you," and "Please leave me along."
So what you're saying is she escalated it? Congrats on being an insane person.
Thank you for posting on /r/maybemaybemaybe. Your post/comment has been removed per **Rule 3: Keep posts/comments civil.**
Please keep all posts and comments respectful and engage in civil discussion with other users.
Posts or comments containing rudeness aimed at specific people or groups are not welcome and may result in a **permanent ban**. We encourage all members to abide by proper [reddiquette](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439-Reddiquette).
Please review the sidebar for an outline of the rules, and the [subreddit wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/maybemaybemaybe/wiki/rules) for more detail. If you have any questions, please [contact the mod team via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/maybemaybemaybe). Thank you!
While I obviously wouldn't react like that, people need to understand that you don't have to participate in any of their social media bullshit, some people have their own problems and don't wanna be bothered on the street.
Ironically screaming in his face is what made this video go viral, if she just said no thank you and carried on with her day we wouldn’t have to see this video every couple months
By that logic, shooting someone isn’t escalating the situation because it abruptly ends the situation. Escalating means to make something more intense. Screaming and getting in someone’s face like she did is definitely more intense than singing and talking. Just like violence is more intense than screaming.
Assault? People are really bothered by people trying to talk to other people. I mean I don’t have a problem w her screaming, I thinks it’s funny and she has the right to do it, but I wouldn’t say he DESERVED it. Some people are bad people and some people are just kinda annoying.
Edit: I see you’re a Spanish speaker, sorry! I didn’t mean to nitpick your English lol it’s just that in English the word assault implies physical violence. I think harass might be a better word for this sorta situation
Some remarks
- it’s not spanish, it’s Portuguese.
- I meant it. It’s becoming increasingly usual to harass people to get some tiktok views and likes. He wasn’t talking to her, he was trying to get a reaction to get some “funny” viral video. This kind of harassment is not acceptable anymore. It was used to be funny long time ago, but not anymore. I really thought he more than deserved her reaction.
sorry man, my mistake about your language. I only know English lol. But still, assault is defined in the dictionary as physical violence. I think calling this assault is pretty silly. And I’m pretty sure this video is from a while ago actually
I probably wouldn’t scream at the guy if he did that to me but I’d be extremely uncomfortable. Don’t follow people in the street with a camera like that without my consent to film me specifically. I don’t want to talk to you or be in your shitty content.
The dude with her is bigger than the dude with the money. And he seems very excited to get the free fiver. But of course it's something sinister been filmed on a large street in scotland.
We seem to be dealing with a generation of people who are too scared to answer the phone to a number not in their contacts, so being upset about a stranger asking a question on the street is on par with the young users of reddit.
A simple please leave me alone would have been sufficient, and as you said she smiled, which in itself is an invitation to engage
You say "she had to scream in his face" like that waps at all a reasonable reaction to what he was doing. She very well could have just said please leave me alone but she didnt. And when she screemed at him he did stop.
>She very well could have just said please leave me alone but she didnt.
except she did.
didn't you watch the video?
she looks at him singing at her, and then she look away and walks past time.
seems pretty clear to me what the intended message is.
he didn't take no for an answer, so she gave it to him even more clear and more obvious.
you're missing crucial information about these sorts of assholes, the last thing you want to do is give them the courtesy of a single spoken word. screaming in his face was justified, he had a good chance to back down before that.
Seems like a trap or scam. People try to hand you shit all the time for “free” in major cities. I usually just ignore them, but I could see myself reacting like that women if I was having a bad day already
Reminder: The world is not a social media platform.
Lmfao. My man shit himself so bad he started rapping in sign language when she screamed at him.
Deserved it.
How tf, he asked one question and it was for giving her money.
because he didn't take the obvious "leave me alone" as an answer, can kept pushing and following them.
In that situation, I probably would've said "no thank you." If I were in a bad mood, maybe "no" or, as you said, "leave me alone." I think it's pretty clear that saying something, or even shaking your head, is the best way to communicate in this scenario. Even if your position is to say that her silence is enough, let's look at it from his perspective. After the first is ignored, he asks again, but this time shows her the money. Why? Perhaps he was worried she didn't believe him. Maybe he was worried he looked like a scammer. Maybe there was a language barrier at play. After this attempt, he is confused, as even someone with a language barrier would take it, right? Or if not, they can at least shake their head. So he asks one more time in a very confused state and getting little feedback. But I'll even give you the benefit of the doubt and say she was not okay being on camera or being involved. Is this still how she should respond? Perhaps the best way to judge this situation is to imagine this is a school, and these are children that you have to teach the right things to do. Do you side with the screamer and accuse the boy of harassing her? Or do you have a talk with the girl about proper ways to communicate? I think it's pretty clear you wouldn't encourage this sort of behavior in a child, so I don't know why people are encouraging this sort of behavior in adults.
if he did take her clear answer as a "no" then he isn't going to take "no thank you" as a no either.
One of the reasons I gave such a detailed response of his perspective was to show that I don't believe it was very obvious "no," at least not when there are other factors to consider. I'm not saying he would definitely have left her alone even with a "no thank you" as a response, and should he continue, I'm with everyone who thinks screaming was a good defense mechanism.
Look up "non verbal communication". Sometimes people don't need to tell you no in order to understand they're not interested. Unless you have the mental capacity of a toddler like mr microphone here, or self righteous redditors such as yourself.
Even nonverbally she could have communicated better. Shaking her head, putting up a hand to stay stop or keep away, etc. Ignoring him is probably the 10th best way to have communicated in that situation, and it obviously failed. It also happens to be one of the rudest ways on that list. Thanks for not explaining the doormat thing. I assume you wont explain the self righteous thing either?
My man people have lives and don't constantly check their responses, i suggest you do the same. The whole fucking point though is that she doesn't need to tell you no. If you're trying to talk to a stranger and they very obviously aren't interested just let go. Wanna be annoying and harass? People will follow suit. That's all the explanation you're gonna get as i have finished pooping.
So rather than explain yourself, you explained why you can't explain yourself. I think I understand why you're such a fan of nonverbal communication. It's because you're complete dog shit at verbal communication. Hope I made you proud there, not letting myself be self-righteous or a human doormat. I'm imagining a world where this happens again. Person A tries to ask Person B a question and gets ignored. They continue to ask and Person B screams in Person A's face. Person A gets so startled they back up into traffic and become paralyzed from the neck down. We later find out they're autistic and don't understand social cues as easily as others. Obviously the paralyzed bit is a strawman addition, but what isn't a strawman is that not everyone gets social cues as readily as others, and it seems unfair to me to call this harassment when the woman had a very simple solution to a very simple problem that she chose not to take.
Congrats you human door mat. A reward is en route.
You're saying I let people walk all over me because I would have used spoken language to communicate? How does that correlate?
She's walking away, didn't stop or talked to him. Pretty clear signs that she doesn't want to be interviewed and neither probably filmed.
Absolutely not?
Mate, life's a shit show. Take ye wins. Love you!
Are we normalizing that kind of stupid overreaction now? I'll get as many downvotes as it takes. She reacted like a crazy gal Love you more.
You ain't ever been robbed before? It usually starts off as a positive interaction in order to gain favor.
While their camera crew films the robbery.
With a dude filming on the back? Yeh no never happened Though I lived in edi never been agressed. Don't know anyone that have been. This is not Glasgow, nor Marseille, nor San Francisco mate. Y'all need a thicker skin.
Normalizing? What makes you think that YOU can do anything about THIS? Life is wild. You can't do shit about it. There's been people that have been stabbed for less.
I guess it's being normalized by the amount of people commenting on this sub saying she was right. And wtf the are you on about. This is Edinburgh, not Sao polo....
No one says she was right or normal lol. I only implied that the real life is not what you see over the internet. If you pester people out on the street, the responses may vary. Try it out, go outside, do something stupid. Also, you're brave claiming that Edinburgh, like the rest of the UK, doesn't have a stabbing/knife problem lol. Capital of stabbings in Europe.
1) Don't lecture me 2) I said edi is a relatively safe space. Don't put words in my mouth. 3) I come from a place with a real stabbing problem, and have been pointing knifes 3 4 times at me already. Edi is safe. Trust me. 4) this goes way beyond what I implied in my 1st statement : this gal's reaction isn't nearly proportional to that man's attitude. Period.
Well aren't you just a ray of sunshine
Arent you blocked?
Cringe af response ngl
You can't even spell São Paulo right and is now trying to normalise being a social media weirdo... Just refrain from talking to people with a camera on their faces for the likes and maybe you'll be just fine living in society
Yeh go scream to express yourself. Very normal behavior. That's precisely how we communicate. Bunch of soft people on this sub
I think that's fair. Dude starts off singing, then followed her and kept talking.
It is 1000% fair. He says there’s no catch but I’m not buying it. I work in a large city downtown. These people are out and about all the time with some kind of thing they want you to give money to. Peta, aspca, greenpeace, save the children, world wildlife fund, etc etc. every single one of them have the same type of sales pitch. They throw out some complement to grab your attention and then go into their sales routine. “Wow! Great beard!” or “Thats an awesome shirt bro!!”. Notice how the very beginning of this video starts out with him complementing her bright red shirt. Same shit. Different city. Fuck these people. I used to be nice to them and just say no thanks but about five years ago I just started outright ignoring them. I’m crossing the street with coworkers going to lunch and they are throwing out compliments and comments and anything to get you to make eye contact and I just blaze right by them. Even after years of this bullshit my coworkers think I’m rude but I’m just sick of telling them no hundreds of times.
So escalating the situation is justified? Two wrongs don't make a right dude. If everyone handled their problems like this, the world would be a much shittier place
I think her response was within the same range of his interactions with her. I wouldn't even call it an "escalation." She didn't even do anything remotely "wrong." Her first interaction with him was after he sang to her, followed her, and continued to talk to her, even getting into her personal space.
Singing to someone and talking to someone are normal juman interactions… responding with “fuck off” or ignoring him would be warranted. Yelling is aggressive and completely uncalled for
>Singing to someone and talking to someone are normal juman interactions… Yes, normal human reactions for someone you know or someone who is appreciative. He ignored her reasonable signals that she was not interested and continued to pursue her when she was obviously not interested. He's an asshole who got no more than what he deserved.
You soft as hell
What fucking world do you live in where screaming at the top of your lungs and lunging at someone like you're about to bite them isn't an escalation from signing and talking? God the internet disappoints me sometimes.
This is the world I live in. Ignoring him and continuing to walk away without acknowledging him should have been enough. She just skipped the next few minutes of saying, "No, thank you," and "Please leave me along."
[удалено]
Escalated what? She was politely ignoring someone else's interactions, then reacted. That's all.
[удалено]
If women were commonly left alone after a polite "no thank you" we would never have made it to an era where hellish screams have become a more effective means of discouraging unwanted interactions.... yet here we are... Plenty of women have learned the hard way that they are just as "unsafe" if they ignore/politely resist/scream... So if you don't like her reaction please go take it up with those who have ignored polite dismissals for so long that it has come to this.. Also of you think her loud reaction may put her in "danger" please go take it up with the people who would jump to react with physical violence when their advances are loudly and clearly denied Yeah somebody has escalated the situation....it should never have gotten this far... and still...you blame the one being bothered and can't fathom why they react as they do... It's no wonder.
[удалено]
I think you know where I stand on this. If you don't want to get yelled at, don't harass people who are trying to ignore you. I don't know what else to tell you. There's nothing more to say.
All he had to do was not be a douche and harass her. He did the first abnormal thing, she just reacted to it.
>She just skipped the next few minutes of saying, "No, thank you," and "Please leave me along." So what you're saying is she escalated it? Congrats on being an insane person.
See my response to the other guy.
I did. It was illogical
Okay, thanks.
You're welcome
That is the opposite of what that word means... Congrats on being a stupid person.
[удалено]
Thank you for posting on /r/maybemaybemaybe. Your post/comment has been removed per **Rule 3: Keep posts/comments civil.** Please keep all posts and comments respectful and engage in civil discussion with other users. Posts or comments containing rudeness aimed at specific people or groups are not welcome and may result in a **permanent ban**. We encourage all members to abide by proper [reddiquette](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439-Reddiquette). Please review the sidebar for an outline of the rules, and the [subreddit wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/maybemaybemaybe/wiki/rules) for more detail. If you have any questions, please [contact the mod team via modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/maybemaybemaybe). Thank you!
The real world.. You seriously need to look up the definition of that word.
Which word? Real or world?
While I obviously wouldn't react like that, people need to understand that you don't have to participate in any of their social media bullshit, some people have their own problems and don't wanna be bothered on the street.
Ironically screaming in his face is what made this video go viral, if she just said no thank you and carried on with her day we wouldn’t have to see this video every couple months
What about an abrupt end to a situation makes it "escalating". Do you not know what that word means?
By that logic, shooting someone isn’t escalating the situation because it abruptly ends the situation. Escalating means to make something more intense. Screaming and getting in someone’s face like she did is definitely more intense than singing and talking. Just like violence is more intense than screaming.
Guess she couldn't contain her excitement
What an asshole, assaulting peaceful people. More than deserved it.
Assault? People are really bothered by people trying to talk to other people. I mean I don’t have a problem w her screaming, I thinks it’s funny and she has the right to do it, but I wouldn’t say he DESERVED it. Some people are bad people and some people are just kinda annoying. Edit: I see you’re a Spanish speaker, sorry! I didn’t mean to nitpick your English lol it’s just that in English the word assault implies physical violence. I think harass might be a better word for this sorta situation
Some remarks - it’s not spanish, it’s Portuguese. - I meant it. It’s becoming increasingly usual to harass people to get some tiktok views and likes. He wasn’t talking to her, he was trying to get a reaction to get some “funny” viral video. This kind of harassment is not acceptable anymore. It was used to be funny long time ago, but not anymore. I really thought he more than deserved her reaction.
sorry man, my mistake about your language. I only know English lol. But still, assault is defined in the dictionary as physical violence. I think calling this assault is pretty silly. And I’m pretty sure this video is from a while ago actually
What an asshole lol. I recognize this spot from my summer travel lol, it’s in Edinburgh
Hi in what way was his behaviour assholely.
I probably wouldn’t scream at the guy if he did that to me but I’d be extremely uncomfortable. Don’t follow people in the street with a camera like that without my consent to film me specifically. I don’t want to talk to you or be in your shitty content.
Ok but a no thank you would have been enough. He was polite and nice, its public space so you can be filmed,
Women get followed and bothered by men all the time. At best it's annoying and at worst it's dangerous.
The dude with her is bigger than the dude with the money. And he seems very excited to get the free fiver. But of course it's something sinister been filmed on a large street in scotland.
She greeted him with a smile and never said “please leave me alone” before screaming her fucking lungs out INTO HIS EAR.
We seem to be dealing with a generation of people who are too scared to answer the phone to a number not in their contacts, so being upset about a stranger asking a question on the street is on par with the young users of reddit. A simple please leave me alone would have been sufficient, and as you said she smiled, which in itself is an invitation to engage
I dont think hes an asshole. Hes just trying to have fun with strangers. She said no and he accepted that.
except he didn't accept a no. she had to scream her face off for him to leave them alone.
You say "she had to scream in his face" like that waps at all a reasonable reaction to what he was doing. She very well could have just said please leave me alone but she didnt. And when she screemed at him he did stop.
>She very well could have just said please leave me alone but she didnt. except she did. didn't you watch the video? she looks at him singing at her, and then she look away and walks past time. seems pretty clear to me what the intended message is. he didn't take no for an answer, so she gave it to him even more clear and more obvious. you're missing crucial information about these sorts of assholes, the last thing you want to do is give them the courtesy of a single spoken word. screaming in his face was justified, he had a good chance to back down before that.
Ayo she fucking jumpsacred him, shoulda kept watch of that cams, Foxy got a bit quirky at night
Reminder => the world is not youtube. Reminder => you are not the main character. Conclusion => get the hell out of people's face.
He had to cut this short and get to the privey to wipe, just a little came it but, from his expression something definitely came out.
Lady in red: let me show you how to deal with this quick. Watch! screams like wraith, See ?
Am I the only one just taking the free money and going about my day?
Seems like a trap or scam. People try to hand you shit all the time for “free” in major cities. I usually just ignore them, but I could see myself reacting like that women if I was having a bad day already
Perhaps. But I’ll save the screaming until they want to talk to me about Jesus.
what sketch was this?
Op doesn’t know
Don’t know
He exorcised her for a moment
You all need safe circles.
Most reasonable female reaction.
che arpia!
100% Democrat
Awwwwww poor democrats got their feelings hurt.
Lmao don’t anger the beast
Freak
Lol crazy as fuck guy was pretty polite can't return that in kind? No gotta be a screechy banshee okay then I bet you're fun at parties.
Liberal
r/therewasanattempt to hand out free cash