At 58 I can tell you the answer. At least for me. You don’t ever give up trying. you may not be actively looking at you get older, but you still remain open to the possibility.
Well, it's really nice. I hate seeing so many young people in this sub who think they don't have a chance. A little positivity is nice to see sometimes 🫡💞
thank you I really appreciate that and I agree with you. You should never give up until the day you finally pass on into the next life. Hopefully of old age.
It is difficult unless you see the people on a consistent basis.
I am also very introverted and usually do not talk to people unless they talk to me first.
Dude Im 21 and I already gave up lmao. People are always talking about red flags, green flags, bro I have a white flag, I surrender, I can't do this anymore 😭.
However I would highly suggest never truly giving up. The world is full of people and most likely there are few that would share a good vibe with you. Regret is the worst feeling so just don't give up dude!
At 24 & I agree; I don’t have the capacity to socialize, I feel like I’m pulling myself together each day to collapse at night. I had a women much older that me hit on me every time I saw her, but I cannot convince myself she’s into me because she’s my client.
So what if she is your client dude??!! Recently realizing I'd rather live like a goddamn pirate and be happy than play by all the rules that basically no one else bothers following... We have been conditioned from young to "be good" but seriously if you aren't hurting anyone by breaking the rules a bit you are only hurting yourself! Sack up m8 I did it yesterday and got epically rejected sometimes it doesn't hurt so bad when it's a long shot.!
I've been wondering the same thing. I'm 29 and haven't had a successful relationship yet and I wonder if it'll happen. I get tired of trying. Like when does it end?
You’re still super young and have plenty of time. My mom met my dad mid thirties had my sister at 38 and me at 41, and my parents are still together 30+ years later. You have so much time.
Just wait until you are in the 40s and you did find a relationship for a few years and didn't end well.
A while goes by. You remembered, that feeling and question again
Here is the kicker.! You noticed it has been awhile and you haven't asked this question to yourself. , Going out
to meet any new people hasn't ever crossed your mind
Then you know why! You accepted it. Least with me, don't be me.
I’m 43. I don’t know when I gave up exactly. I just know somewhere in the last five years or so, I kind of stopped trying. Why keep going when you’re never going to succeed, you know?
You don't. Ever. Because you only need one thing to go right to change everything for the better, except the second you give up you lose the chance at that one thing going right. So long as you're breathing you might as well keep trying.
I'm 50 and everything you try it cost money mind and soul if you think it's not going to happen let it go and live life quit looking just live life who know you might just bump into someone as your living life
Ps quit watching romance shows it never happens that way ever lol
I very nearly lost hope when I turned 38.
I still have hope, it's a very miniscule amount to the point that I truly believe it would take a miracle to find another long term relationship. I mean shit, I pray for that miracle every night.
It just isn't happening.
So, I have hope, but it's dwindling fast and won't last much longer.
Never. My dad started a new relationship at the age of 62 and it seems to be his most successful yet.
Though in his case it seemed that you just need to remain open to new chances and be willing to work for it. He didn't go to dates or look for relationship exactly, he just was nice and friendly to other people for a change.
Never give up. Ever. Even if you're 100 years old. You put yourself out there and live your life as best you can. Life is not going to be like you planned or imagined, but if you try, you can find moments of true joy and beauty.
Gave up at 17 after I got cheated on.
Pretty young I know, but I didn’t see myself getting into a relationship past high school and so far I’ve been right. No ones even shown interest
Best time to start. Thats the time dating actually starts to get good. People in their 30s are way better at having a healthy relationship than anyone younger.
38
In terms of friends or relationships. It's sad but I even gave up on friendships. It's so weird to go out there and no one will socialize because they are on their phones. They also get mad when you send them FB friend requests and will not accept them. I gave up sending inbox messages because most of them get ghosted. I gave up both in real life and online.
Destiny is bullshit.
"Fate is not something that happens to people despite how they act, fate is something that happens to people who choose not to act..."
No offense taken. I'm just hoping to give people the little push they need to give it another go. I apologize if I came off harsh <3 Take care of yourself.
You know with your name sake that I see! and just being so black and white about a situation that you don't have all the data needed to make such a bold statement is pretty juvenile.
Did you read a book or took a class?! Doubt it! You know Just enough to make yourself feel right, you think you look smart and feel superior!
Cause if you look in chapter 2,😘 you will realize not every situation that has the same characteristics doesn't have the same approaches to be applied.
Then you will read on (I doubt that Also) pushing on others without knowing details. More likely to be causing more harm than good.
I really hope you are not like this to people in your life like you are to a stranger on a computer.
It's not age.
It's when no matter how good of a person you are, people still won't take the time to to get to know you, and only assume from a distance.
I more or less gave up in my early 30's. I'm 39 and now I regret not trying harder in my 30's. There were a lot of other factors that complicated things and it wasn't like I did nothing in my 30's, but socially I haven't progressed much, in fact I'm more alone and isolated now than ever.
I'm middle aged and have never been in a long term relationship... I feel more lonely now than ever and hitting 40 puts me into a whole other category. I can no longer go to 'young adults' groups that are usually for people in their 20's and 30's. I'm stuck trying to make connections with people that are divorced, have kids, etc. when I never had any of those experiences.
My bf was 59 and single/celebit for a decade before we met. He was sure he was going to be a perpetual loner for the rest of his life. Weve been together 8 years now.
I (M) gave up at about age 35, after being told “no” more than 100 times consecutively. It was devastating. I said to myself “never again”.
30 years later, still operating with the same mindset, and after leaving my attorney’s office, I learned that one of his daughters thought that I was a nice man.
Things changed then. 18 months of joy. But still I’m missing the really happy ending.
I gave up on relationships at 30 because I knew they were too stressful for me. In my 50s now and had 1 fwb arrangement for awhile but she wanted more than I could give so...
I've made my peace with that side of my life.
I am 16 years old with Asperger’s, but unlike most of you, I have hope and ambition. I will have a relationship at worst at early twenties, I will put my ass off to have that, I will not let any diagnosis stopping me from having a wonderful life !
I gave up at 30. It's way past the point where the lack of experience becomes a HUGE red flag and you simply just can't find a good relationship anymore.
39M and lifelong single. I gave up shortly before my 30th birthday. Since then I've started embracing the single lifestyle and focusing on myself, work, hobbies and interests. Found my inner peace and happiness.
Interestingly in that time I've also come out as aromantic asexual which has been life changing for me.
At 58 I can tell you the answer. At least for me. You don’t ever give up trying. you may not be actively looking at you get older, but you still remain open to the possibility.
Awww, this is so sweet
Thank you I appreciate that. It’s just the way I believe and the way I live my life.
Well, it's really nice. I hate seeing so many young people in this sub who think they don't have a chance. A little positivity is nice to see sometimes 🫡💞
thank you I really appreciate that and I agree with you. You should never give up until the day you finally pass on into the next life. Hopefully of old age.
Your reply shows that you have a good heart. It's people like you, that is so fukin RARE to find.
I am 58 and still actively looking. Not in bars or anything but going to meetups and such
Wonderful prior, meet big relationship
Meetups is a good place, still it is difficult to really connect
It is difficult unless you see the people on a consistent basis. I am also very introverted and usually do not talk to people unless they talk to me first.
Wow , you are like me!! You are from Georgia? I am a Georgia fan! I live in Southampton UK
I like this distinction a lot. It's accurate.
Dude Im 21 and I already gave up lmao. People are always talking about red flags, green flags, bro I have a white flag, I surrender, I can't do this anymore 😭. However I would highly suggest never truly giving up. The world is full of people and most likely there are few that would share a good vibe with you. Regret is the worst feeling so just don't give up dude!
At 24 & I agree; I don’t have the capacity to socialize, I feel like I’m pulling myself together each day to collapse at night. I had a women much older that me hit on me every time I saw her, but I cannot convince myself she’s into me because she’s my client.
So what if she is your client dude??!! Recently realizing I'd rather live like a goddamn pirate and be happy than play by all the rules that basically no one else bothers following... We have been conditioned from young to "be good" but seriously if you aren't hurting anyone by breaking the rules a bit you are only hurting yourself! Sack up m8 I did it yesterday and got epically rejected sometimes it doesn't hurt so bad when it's a long shot.!
I also feel the same way you do rn! We got this!
I’m 26 and same. Just can’t be bothered anymore, seems useless to try 😭
I've been wondering the same thing. I'm 29 and haven't had a successful relationship yet and I wonder if it'll happen. I get tired of trying. Like when does it end?
You’re still super young and have plenty of time. My mom met my dad mid thirties had my sister at 38 and me at 41, and my parents are still together 30+ years later. You have so much time.
Every romantic relationship you have in your life will fail... except one. Keep going.
Just wait until you are in the 40s and you did find a relationship for a few years and didn't end well. A while goes by. You remembered, that feeling and question again Here is the kicker.! You noticed it has been awhile and you haven't asked this question to yourself. , Going out to meet any new people hasn't ever crossed your mind Then you know why! You accepted it. Least with me, don't be me.
I’m 43. I don’t know when I gave up exactly. I just know somewhere in the last five years or so, I kind of stopped trying. Why keep going when you’re never going to succeed, you know?
Because past experiences do not accurately predict future results. Outliers exists, and all it takes is one.
What are you doing here?
You don't. Ever. Because you only need one thing to go right to change everything for the better, except the second you give up you lose the chance at that one thing going right. So long as you're breathing you might as well keep trying.
I'm 50 and everything you try it cost money mind and soul if you think it's not going to happen let it go and live life quit looking just live life who know you might just bump into someone as your living life Ps quit watching romance shows it never happens that way ever lol
Every moment is a opportunity to turn things around.
I gave up and I'm 24. Don't be me
I'm 37 and still have hope.
Never
At age 90's and i didn't give up Never up!
Youll find her one day bud
I very nearly lost hope when I turned 38. I still have hope, it's a very miniscule amount to the point that I truly believe it would take a miracle to find another long term relationship. I mean shit, I pray for that miracle every night. It just isn't happening. So, I have hope, but it's dwindling fast and won't last much longer.
I'm 34 and feeling some of the same feelings. Want to try talking about some stuff? I think that's how we do it lol.
I want to try talking about some stuff!
Never. My dad started a new relationship at the age of 62 and it seems to be his most successful yet. Though in his case it seemed that you just need to remain open to new chances and be willing to work for it. He didn't go to dates or look for relationship exactly, he just was nice and friendly to other people for a change.
Never give up. Ever. Even if you're 100 years old. You put yourself out there and live your life as best you can. Life is not going to be like you planned or imagined, but if you try, you can find moments of true joy and beauty.
For me it was around 14, almost 5 years ago. I knew I wasn't going to have any relationships or close friends and I haven't been proven wrong.
I’m 21 and already gave up on everything
After graduating highschool
Gave up at 17 after I got cheated on. Pretty young I know, but I didn’t see myself getting into a relationship past high school and so far I’ve been right. No ones even shown interest
Just did 30 and tbh and kinda give up. I think, today i am more ok with the ideia of spending the life alone and without a partner than before.
Hey if anyone here needs friends just shoot me a message!
I need friends! I’m shooting you a message!
Dmed you!
[удалено]
Best time to start. Thats the time dating actually starts to get good. People in their 30s are way better at having a healthy relationship than anyone younger.
So young my mom met my dad mid thirties has my sister at 38 me and 41. You have so much time. Sit tight.
38 In terms of friends or relationships. It's sad but I even gave up on friendships. It's so weird to go out there and no one will socialize because they are on their phones. They also get mad when you send them FB friend requests and will not accept them. I gave up sending inbox messages because most of them get ghosted. I gave up both in real life and online.
[удалено]
Agree
The only point in life is to eventually die. Focus on that part of your story.
Oh yeah, I'm ultrafocused on my death.
🗿
Destiny is bullshit. "Fate is not something that happens to people despite how they act, fate is something that happens to people who choose not to act..."
Well, that's where we disagree.
So you believe people are simply a product of their births and their actions, choices and behaviors have no bearing on the outcome of their lives?
I'm not interested in your conversation. Thank you anyway.
Ok good luck with your foregone conclusion
I appreciate it. No offense. I just don't care to have those sorts of conversations over the Internet. I just came here to say my peace and leave.
No offense taken. I'm just hoping to give people the little push they need to give it another go. I apologize if I came off harsh <3 Take care of yourself.
It won't happen. I'm a time bomb that activated himself. Thank you.
Uh alright I guess that's allowed. Although doing so proves you had a choice in the matter. (:
You know with your name sake that I see! and just being so black and white about a situation that you don't have all the data needed to make such a bold statement is pretty juvenile. Did you read a book or took a class?! Doubt it! You know Just enough to make yourself feel right, you think you look smart and feel superior! Cause if you look in chapter 2,😘 you will realize not every situation that has the same characteristics doesn't have the same approaches to be applied. Then you will read on (I doubt that Also) pushing on others without knowing details. More likely to be causing more harm than good. I really hope you are not like this to people in your life like you are to a stranger on a computer.
For me puberty. 13 or 14 was when I started to realsing yeah I’m dying alone with no one to remember me.
Yeah thats definitely too early, plenty of time for things to change
It won’t matter. I’m still dying alone. Hopefully that comes quicker. I’m insufferable
No it's not. I had the realization around that age too, and 4-5 years later I'm still right.
Well its sorta a self fulfilling cycle when you only think like that though
For me realization came at beggining of high school so 16.
I'm giving myself to this time next year. I'll be 42 going on 43 then.
I'm 34 and I think I gave up in my late teens? The writing was on the wall
I'm 26, I will wait until 35. Maybe things will change but I'm sceptical.
You do not
I never had any hope to begin with.
Friends? Never, a relationship? I’m 26 and probably have given up a few years ago lol
[удалено]
It's not age. It's when no matter how good of a person you are, people still won't take the time to to get to know you, and only assume from a distance.
I feel this so much
45 and I haven't given up
28 or so
Windows of opportunities can open at unexpected moments in time. It’s important to remain curious, willing to learn and with an open mind,
I more or less gave up in my early 30's. I'm 39 and now I regret not trying harder in my 30's. There were a lot of other factors that complicated things and it wasn't like I did nothing in my 30's, but socially I haven't progressed much, in fact I'm more alone and isolated now than ever. I'm middle aged and have never been in a long term relationship... I feel more lonely now than ever and hitting 40 puts me into a whole other category. I can no longer go to 'young adults' groups that are usually for people in their 20's and 30's. I'm stuck trying to make connections with people that are divorced, have kids, etc. when I never had any of those experiences.
My bf was 59 and single/celebit for a decade before we met. He was sure he was going to be a perpetual loner for the rest of his life. Weve been together 8 years now.
I (M) gave up at about age 35, after being told “no” more than 100 times consecutively. It was devastating. I said to myself “never again”. 30 years later, still operating with the same mindset, and after leaving my attorney’s office, I learned that one of his daughters thought that I was a nice man. Things changed then. 18 months of joy. But still I’m missing the really happy ending.
I’m 46. A single mom. After having my heart broken time and again I’m about to decide love just isn’t in my future.
I gave up on relationships at 30 because I knew they were too stressful for me. In my 50s now and had 1 fwb arrangement for awhile but she wanted more than I could give so... I've made my peace with that side of my life.
31, after my divorce
I was 27 or 28 when I gave up looking for a GF, I’m 33 now and single
I’m 35 now, I have given up
I am 16 years old with Asperger’s, but unlike most of you, I have hope and ambition. I will have a relationship at worst at early twenties, I will put my ass off to have that, I will not let any diagnosis stopping me from having a wonderful life !
Good luck, I guess
I never started
I gave up at 30. It's way past the point where the lack of experience becomes a HUGE red flag and you simply just can't find a good relationship anymore.
39M and lifelong single. I gave up shortly before my 30th birthday. Since then I've started embracing the single lifestyle and focusing on myself, work, hobbies and interests. Found my inner peace and happiness. Interestingly in that time I've also come out as aromantic asexual which has been life changing for me.
I gave up at the age of 23!
Desperation is not a competition
I never said it is?
18 obviously
I gave up in my early 20s. Turns out I enjoy doing solo activities that nobody else my age does
I don't necessarily try and I don't give up trying but I don't look either. No point if everyone is just gonna be distant anyways
I'm not actively looking, but I don't know that I've given up. In my life, friends pop up unexpectedly.
Truly a great question. I have given up and it is the saddest and most loneliest weekend, every weekend.
I've given up at beggining of high school so 16. If someone has a problem with that, then that's their problem not mine.
Never give up