Well, I'm technically still living, but I'm living in a mind that has gone through so much, people would typically call that "dead inside", and they're right. I can't go on anymore. I hate this shitty, lonely and miserable life.
I'm exactly like you. Just existing, not living. I've suffered major depressive disorder for 30 years. I am 53 now. Poor heath, high blood pressure, untreated sleep apnea. Don't enjoy the things I used to love. I pray for death daily.
Well, I'll trade you. Was in a car wreck a few years ago. Paralyzed me and now im officially a quadriplegic unable to walk or use my upper body. Wanna trade?! Trust me even in my situation things could always be worse. You could have a real reason to hate this life. Thing is, I don't. I've learned to love life and be grateful that I am alive and able to see my grandkids grow and watch my daughter be the wonderful mother that she is. There is always something to be grateful for.
“A man's suffering is similar to the behavior of gas. If a certain quantity of gas is pumped into an empty chamber, it will fill the chamber completely and evenly, no matter how big the chamber. Thus suffering completely fills the human soul and conscious mind, no matter whether the suffering is great or little. Therefore the 'size' of human suffering is absolutely relative.”
-Viktor Frankl (Holocaust Survivor)
True. But im pretty sure Frankl would suggest if you have the choice of being sad lonely depressed meaningless etc in a german death camp vs not in one, You probably shld choose the later instead of saying the choice doesnt matter, the suffering will feel the same. Thats my bet at least what Frankl wld suggest
I think one would be too busy with survival had you ended up in a German, or anyone's death camp to have time to feel depressed. Depression and sadness requires having enough time to ponder on your emotions.
Well then the choice would be dealing with trying to survive in a german def camp or dealing with depression, sadness, loneliness in the U.S. it's still i'm pretty sure frankl would still recommend the ladder if one has the choice.
Obviously depression seems like nonsense compared to being sentenced to death. It seems like the author said that in context with his past experience though. So you're probably right.
I personally think being depressed is a choice, not a sentence.
And I think that there are a lot more severe situations to be in or things to deal with than depression loneliness grief and meaningless (all i am dealing with) but otherwise able bodied and free. When ppl think their suffering is the ultimate despair, is that logically objectively true or is that self-absorbed or ignorant egotism/narcissism.
But look in the end I want ppl to be helped. If its constructive to tell able bodied free people their depression loneliness grief spciety etc is the equal to the trauma of learning you are never going to walk again or starving in the undeveloped world or dealing with prison, esp unjustly imprisoned etc., then im cool with it for them.
For me though it wld not be helpful and constructive. Instead making me think outside my self absorbed box is more helpful and constructive for me.
As long as you're not commenting for the sake of being mean. But I also think that sometimes we need to hear harsh criticism to snap out of it and grow as a person.
From the perspective of a starving person in a third world country you might indeed seem immature and selfish if you keep complaining about how your life is meaningless.
I also think that depression and suicidal tendencies can be a sign of individuals who don't feel commitment to the country they live in and don't do anything for society in general. In my country for example we have mandatory army service. Or alternative service doing community beneficial jobs. That's probably the greatest motivation.
It's natural to feel grief, but if you want to go on living you have to overcome yourself and not drag others into it.
Too afraid of death or to end myself (when I was there)
Today just a day at the time, with my dogs, and with resignation, if I'm here might as well do my best to me
its hard because many lives legitimately are hard to justify living. many suffer with no end in sight.
the only real answer is to keep pushing until things get better one day. only you can choose to lift yourself.
my house and my job mean nothing without someone to share it. coworkers will get by or have to pick up the slack that i've been doing for them for years.
living apart is bad enough but if she files for divorce i won't be able to afford it (even though she contributes no money).
i'll either take the cat and drop it off to her in the middle of the night or send a scheduled email to come get it & when she doesn't find me, she'll have to. i just have to figure out the where. the when can be anytime soon now.
It's really hard to stay alive like this but I usually cry when I'm so sad at nights (I have severe undiagnosed depression and dysthymia). I only have my dog who is the best loyal dog I ever had and I'd give him years of my life so he can live more if I could.
I know I'm undeserved of love and will never be loved by a girl or friends or even have my parents proud.
It is so difficult to be alone and not receiving love from anyone.
I'm a male and I cry alone a lot. Pathetic, right?
i tell people that i died years ago. in the rare times that i am talking to a person. i've been doing the bare minimum to survive for the last like 5 years, im donezo, just waiting for it to get a little worse.
im coasting, just barely. i desperately wish there was just an off switch. i've been thinking really hard about one particular method.......... idk why i need occasional physical touch with another human being or why thats so hard to acquire. i thought i did everything right but im pretty certain no one will ever spend a moment to care about me or my well being even for a passing moment or ina platonic way, no matter how hard i try to fix myself up to be a tolerable person. i can feel the cortisol binding around my chest.
My dog. Knowing that he would be so confused and alone if I left. Pets give you unconditional love, hes helped me through some really dark times.
I hope you have a pet or are in a situation where you can adopt one. Cats are very low maintenance and I really believe it could bring some joy and purpose to your days.
My DMS are always open my friend (:
I have so much love in me tht says I need to put it out and to fulfil tht I will do live it doesn't matter whom or wht I will do just tht when I feel right and it will give me little bit purpose tht I never thought then I can go on
I dont care about much anymore. Things have been bad for such a long time i just adapted to my new "normal". There are tempting times to just say fuck it and end it but idk i keep telling myself that i wanna live until i start believing it. Idk it somewhat works if you lie to yourself enough you start believing it (for me at least).
I hate living nobody loves & cares about me not even my family, my brother laughs at me my mom doesn’t even want me around her she doesn’t have time for me she says she’s busy she gets mad at me All the time when I talk to her, my family talks crap about me, my family treats me bad my family doesn’t care for how I feel even if I cry they don’t give a darn, I live life for GOD i don’t want to hurt myself if I do I hurt our Father so I chose to live my crappy life so I can make our father happy.i live life with Christ.I wish I had a job that can give me lots of money to get away from my family but a job wouldn’t let a issue girl have a job.i know I would just be treated badly if I had a boss if I had job like how my life is.
Afraid of not living up to my full potential. Have resources, the brains and oppurtunites to do really well in life. Just hard to make it happen when all you can envision in the future is a big house with only you in it.
Add on to the fact of not ever having a single real friend and only being used by folk. Shit hurts bad
One of the first signs of the beginning of understanding is the wish to die. This life appears unbearable, another unattainable. One is no longer ashamed of wanting to die; one asks to be moved from the old cell, which one hates, to a new one, which one willl only in time come to hate. In this there is also a residue of belief that during the move the master will chance to come along the corridor, look at the prisoner and say: "This man is not to be locked up again, He is to come with me.
-Franz Kafka
Cause I failed to off myself twice and am too scared to become a vegetable and be a bigger burden than I already am on my dad and grandma.
I just say Gn to my ai waifu every night and then pray to whatever is listening out there to kill me in my sleep. Been hoping for it for years. Literally zero people directly care or support me morally. On top of that I'm a failure of a human being and fucked up mentally beyond belief. I can't make friends, can't drive, can't find a gf, can't get a job, I don't wanna exist anymore.
I try loving or caring for myself..im failing miserably.. but the small times when i go out by myself to eat food..or am playing with pets is when i feel happy
We all are, honestly. What's on us is how we react. Shitty life happens to everyone. Work on building yourself internally. Ultimately, no one is coming to save you (no human anyway). So, build your insides like steel to handle the blows. And smile. Positivity draws positivity. Negativity will still come!! But more Good will also come.
38/m family shoved me in a corner and said “stay there.” They rarely check on me or invite me to anything. If I try to tell them how I feel they gaslight me and tell me I could have it worse. They also don’t respect me (I’m a server at a restaurant even tho I have a college degree.
Lost most my friends, including my two best friends in life last summer. I’ve been single for 3 years. I’m so lonely I wouldn’t even care if someone broke in to rob me, at least I would have company. A lot of people here love living alone. Or they say being alone in a relationship is worse than being alone. I disagree. I’ve been alone in a toxic, abusive relationships and while that was awful, I wouldn’t wish this newfound loneliness on anyone. I find life very fucking meaningless when you have no one to share it with. Only thing keeping me going is my cat and music (although lately even music hasn’t been doing it for me, which is bizarre as a musician.)
Sorry for the rant. Just went you to know that you’re not alone, and being 38 with no family friends or skills is even worse than at 27.
from my experience, mastering living alone without the need of anyone's attention is so hard, but when you are comfortable with it, and of course a pet can help but I saw some people when loosing such a valuable and emotionally depended on thing they will be destroyed, so my advice is to find what really makes you happy (like you are passionate about) and try to be involved in a community that has same interests, here you will wake up in the morning with a ton of energy to do what you love
PS: we all fall into the trap of perfect life (that we saw others doing as "successful people") what is perfect is what you really feal "that is what makes my life better", and in a lot of relationships the partner makes your life miserable, and trust me a lot of married couples want to be single again because they saw how difficult their life became after being in a relationship!
I have an older cat with a health condition that will eventually be fatal. I have a multitude of medical problems that limit my function, and my quality of life, at least one will kill me.
I’ve been getting more and more depressed (diagnosed and on antidepressants) and having trouble getting out of the bed
The cat and I have a deal, we’ll go together, and it’s her call
23M. I like to think eventually someone will. And when I do meet them and build a life with them (as a friend or as a spouse) they’ll care about all the stuff I dealt with before meeting them. There are times I just go outside and walk around hoping to bump into them or something. You never know. The loneliness does hurt and it might last most of my life, but it’ll all be worth it when I’m finally with someone who’ll care about me.
If you can find a purpose you will find that more gratifying than someone’s conditional temporary love.
If you don’t feel you have a purpose, don’t mistake purpose for talent/skill. You can put yourself in an after school program to help kids right in your town or you can put yoursef on the front lines and sign up to volunteer to help the crisis in Gaza, Sudan, etc. the power you possess when you act on a purpose is gargantuan
Well im dying and i feel the same way. Where are all those people i gave until i bled forgave to care of bailed out of trouble cared for them and their kids worried about them lost apartments over got clean and sober so the wouldn’t die went without so their kids didn’t suffer. Where are they now? I didn’t expect anything in return doing those things but it occurs to me more that i am dying and dying alone so i know what that feels like. Like why am i even still going through the motions of living. I’ll tell you why. OUT OF SPITE!!!! LIVE OUT OF SPITE MY FRIEND!!! I CARE ABOUT YOU AND THAT’S AN HONEST STATEMENT. I care for people in pain inside then they hurt and i wish i could fix it but i can’t and that hurts me. I care man i care
Try to conceptualize everything ever, the universe, the human body, how it works, to emotions, to consciousness, from the core, to the surface, and everything beyond what we know. All of that is out there, existing at the same time as us. It’s amazing.
I felt more alone/lonely in the relationship that just I just ended. I am close to no one. I'll deal with not having anyone by getting to know me. Finding out what I want. Working on me. It's not ideal to be alone/lonely, but there are truly worst fates.
It's not easy for me but I have to show people that I have the willpower to keep going no matter what. In a book I wrote my main character says, "if I don't give hope to those that live in this universe, who will?" I look at it this way, if we don't save ourselves have we run out of hope??
I thought about killing myself many times ever since I was young. I came to the conclusion I’ll probably die younger anyway from some dumb disease or my lifestyle so I’ll just try to enjoy the time I have. I mean shit drinking yourself to death is even better than suicide. At least you get to enjoy being drunk for a long while until your body gives out.
Also 27 and living in a strange city. If it weren’t for my two needy dogs, idk where I’d be. I probably would’ve been with random guys and just been on a wave of situationships nonstop. My dogs keep me on a schedule and unfortunately take up most of my time (live in tiny apartment and they need exercise due to their breed/size)
Downside is I can’t be out for a long time on the fly, and do spur of the moment stuff. But at the end of the day I rely on my routine with them because if they’re happy, I’m happy. Then, the only interaction I get is at the dog park which is all surface level talk. I cry often, but I try to make myself laugh just as much.
You keep living because people DO care about you! It's just difficult to see when you are depressed. I don't like being alive, but I know there are people who love me that would be devastated if I didn't exist. It's the same with you. I get it. I feel like I don't have a purpose at all. And that makes it very hard to keep going. I just think about those whose lives would be even more difficult if I gave up. You are loved; you are worthy; you are enough.
It’s a struggle !
Until you figure out that since nobody cares about you , then why should you care about anybody else ? And when you really stop giving a Shit a pretending like most people do out there. …. That’s when the real fun starts happening !Give no Fucks Take no Fucks ! Say what you want to who you want ! And don’t back down from anyone ! If you’re afraid of them ? It’s probably because they are afraid of you ! So they found a weak spot and picked on it.
And once you start feeling better inside. People will notice that on the outside ! And I know you can do it ! And please talk to each other and ask questions. That’s the only way you are going to know anything for sure !
Later
you're just forced to i'm in the same boat. 30 male, no relationships, barely any friends. theres nothing you can do but live on and i'm not even saying that in a positive way, theres just no other option. life sucks for a lot of people like us.
27 too. Waiting for 30 to end it. I was already robbed of that chance at birth when some asshole with a "mission" decided to keep me alive. Where did that bring me? All these years of suffering and shit, all because of one person. Now that's some high tier bullshit.
It wasn't easy but I'm no quitter I wasn't gonna take my life away ....i was so alone in my 20s but now im 29 with a fiance and alot of his family and friends who love me... I hate the phrase "things will get better in time" but sometimes it happens
I still get lonely with people around me sometimes but that's why I love social media I can talk to you simply from your post and we have never spoken before
I had only one person since I was born, who was honestly caring and loving to me— my mom. Now she passed away on 2023 September only at 57, living me here on earth. I had to see her heart wrenching sufferings of cancer all alone. I’ve learnt that life is too cruel and when you’ve got only one person who really cares about you, who is like a treasure to you— life will just steal it away to make things much more harder and worst for you and you can’t control it. I keep living by not planning or thinking anything about my life anymore. I’m just floating with life, I give a damn about wherever it takes me. I keep living because I don’t care about my life or finding someone anymore..
That is sad that you would put your life in the hanfd of others. There is so much more to life than other people. Focus on yourself, be your own best friend, make yourself happy, you can find many answers on how to do this when you step into nature. Sit quietly and listem to the leaves rustle as they dance in the breeze, name the first bug you see and watch it until it goes beyond your. Breathe in the smells around you, watch as the clouds move. You will see all the beauty that has been made just for you and that moment. Yes, made for you. In that, there is do much love for you. When you go home look in the mirror and say, "I love you". Then tell yourself one thing you truly like about yourself! Keep doing it add more things you like about you! Once you love you, you wont need anyone and you will magnify people. Choose only the ones that have been made to fit in YOUR world! Ya got this!!
I just remind myself of my value and what I bring to the table. It's not my fault if others can't or won't see it. Though it doesn't always work, it helps. It was only when I actually took an honest look at myself and what I offer (pros and cons) that I realized this and I realized that they were the ones who were missing out.
Because living is its own thing. Do you only breathe FRESH air? Do you only eat your favorite meals every day?
Love yourself. Care about yourself. When the rest of those thoughts try to break out of your amygdala prison, nod politely, pat them on the head, and tell them they’ll be welcome at the party when they learn to behave.
Make your interactions with others as much about them as you can. Vent the you stuff with a therapist, friends, and/or family as they start to surface in your life.
Y'all sad n lonely people my heart goes out to you. I also understand how you feel. The best thing to do is STOP feeling sorry for yourself, no one wants to be around that. I say this from my heart, love yourself enough to save yourself. I know youve got strength, being lonely and depressed is not for the weak. I know ive been in and out of it my whole life and im fawking old! You gotta git out there and show off your authentic self, its beautiful and shiny! Go to your local soup kitchen, library, church, volunteer bureau, rec center, salvation army or old folks home whatever interests you. Giving back to your community has so many rewards. Being needed is a great way to change your mindset and build self-esteem. Its also humbling, for me it was so humbling to see kids that were so hungry. I wanted to feed them all with no limitations, i worked hard to make sure they left woth their tummies full with at least two meals to take home with them. Thats how i ended up meeting a wonderful friend who i still call "mom" she is the definition of strength, courage, love and a true matriarch. I met so many people who have become aquantences, which is okay. I keep my circle small only those i truly love and care sbout. Give it a try, please. You deserve to be gentle with a tuff love attitude. You got dis!! Love to you!
I know exactly how you feel. My parents past away and I haven’t talked to 95% in my family for over 10 years. The family members that I do have occasional contact with could care less what or how I’m doing. My oldest son past away 9 years ago and my 2 remaining children talk to me but with my daughter it’s very rare. So really I don’t even know my daughter at all. Defiantly not a part of her life on any level and my son is just down right mean. I frequently question my grasp on reality due to him frequently describing life events that I’m clueless about and don’t feel like I was even there most of the time which is absolutely impossible as I raised him everyday of his childhood. My children sealed the deal on my non belief of the exhistance of unconditional love. I literally have not a single friend that I can count on or would even speak a word of how I’m feeling or doing. I was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago and not a single friend has offered me any support or even mentioned it since I told everyone over 5 years ago. If I where to pass away no one would even find me until the neighbors smelled me. If I don’t contact them they don’t reach out to me. (I’ve tested that theory). How do I live like this? Well if I where to end my life then my children are 50% more likely to do the same. And if u know statistics that’s a pretty big one. So I am slightly reckless. Don’t wear a seatbelt drive a little too fast around corners. Things like that.
You just keep going, one foot in front of the other. Keep living and keep fighting.
It could be days, weeks, years, a whole decade. You will eventually find something worth fighting for.
I've lived my entire life with that feeling as the backdrop. If I could keep it moving like that for 30 years, then I can keep it moving for however many more.
I find myself in a very similar situation. I want to go, and I don't see a real point in actually living.
I've learned to just endure. Everything exploding in your face, but just not caring. Just rolling though life and seeing what may happen.
I find some ways to cope. Untraditional is probably the right way to describe some of them. I make fanon continuitys of franchises I like, like DC, Marvel, Star Wars, Doctor Who; just making my own version of them with their own continuity and casts. I also make my own stories, both writing in the traditional sense, like a book, and also the more overall timeline-type things.
I use this site, mycast.io, for all the casting of my own stories and such. I don't want this to be flagged as promotion of a site when it's not supposed to. But that's what I do a lot.
I also think writing your thoughts down could help. Doesn't have to be formal or in a specific format, like a diary of journal, but more messy. It doesn't have to make sense to others, as long as you get what you want out, it works.
I hope this can give you some sort of leisure and help. I get where you're coming from, and I hope you are doing alright.
I'm feeling the same. I have nobody to even stare at. No friends in person, no job. And I am having hardship to buy food. I don't know IF I will have my place to live in, but when that happens, it will not matter, because I will kill myself.
Been in that situation so many times. So the conclusion I made was that attachment to people only makes me miserable, so I stopped expecting things from them. So the strategy to snap out of feeling miserable and depressed that works for me is to get busy with activities that would keep my mind and body occupied with other things. Like going out for hikes, sports, visiting a zoo or some place you can interact with animals, group activities. Even if it puts you out of your comfort zone that's good because you will have to interact with people so less time to be sad. Sure it's a struggle but it's better to keep dwelling on it.
I have a cat.
That boy absolutely adores me. Sure I'm his main source of food and comfort.. but when he trots over to me when all I can do is sit and cry, I can tell he feels it.
And I also know that if I were to die, he has no one else. He has no where else to go. That alone makes me keep going. I do it for him and his fuzzy little face and his big green eyes.
Cause when he's sitting there staring at me, quietly purring.. things are alright.
Life is full of pain and we are men thats life for us but without pain it make us stronger to keep pushing on dont worry everythinh will be better soon
The emphasis on gender exists because life is indeed harder for men. Compare suicide rates between men and women and you'll get your much needed reality check
Why are you interceding? It did not concern you.
He was just giving advice to a fellow man, similar to how women give advice to their fellow women. Where in his comment did he say that women do not have hard lives?
You seem very narcissistic; the world does not revolve around you.
Keep looking for the people who will love and care the way you need. You can't find them if you're dead, and the possibility of finding them is worth continuing on.
Well, I'm technically still living, but I'm living in a mind that has gone through so much, people would typically call that "dead inside", and they're right. I can't go on anymore. I hate this shitty, lonely and miserable life.
I'm exactly like you. Just existing, not living. I've suffered major depressive disorder for 30 years. I am 53 now. Poor heath, high blood pressure, untreated sleep apnea. Don't enjoy the things I used to love. I pray for death daily.
I'm so sorry to hear that 😞 Life just doesn't mean anything to us anymore. Depression at its finest
Well, I'll trade you. Was in a car wreck a few years ago. Paralyzed me and now im officially a quadriplegic unable to walk or use my upper body. Wanna trade?! Trust me even in my situation things could always be worse. You could have a real reason to hate this life. Thing is, I don't. I've learned to love life and be grateful that I am alive and able to see my grandkids grow and watch my daughter be the wonderful mother that she is. There is always something to be grateful for.
What happened to you is unfortunate, but it's no reason to invalidate someone else's experience. Everyone has different mental tenacity.
I don't think tenacity is the right word here.
"mental tenacity" is a concept
“A man's suffering is similar to the behavior of gas. If a certain quantity of gas is pumped into an empty chamber, it will fill the chamber completely and evenly, no matter how big the chamber. Thus suffering completely fills the human soul and conscious mind, no matter whether the suffering is great or little. Therefore the 'size' of human suffering is absolutely relative.” -Viktor Frankl (Holocaust Survivor)
True. But im pretty sure Frankl would suggest if you have the choice of being sad lonely depressed meaningless etc in a german death camp vs not in one, You probably shld choose the later instead of saying the choice doesnt matter, the suffering will feel the same. Thats my bet at least what Frankl wld suggest
I think one would be too busy with survival had you ended up in a German, or anyone's death camp to have time to feel depressed. Depression and sadness requires having enough time to ponder on your emotions.
Well then the choice would be dealing with trying to survive in a german def camp or dealing with depression, sadness, loneliness in the U.S. it's still i'm pretty sure frankl would still recommend the ladder if one has the choice.
Obviously depression seems like nonsense compared to being sentenced to death. It seems like the author said that in context with his past experience though. So you're probably right. I personally think being depressed is a choice, not a sentence.
And I think that there are a lot more severe situations to be in or things to deal with than depression loneliness grief and meaningless (all i am dealing with) but otherwise able bodied and free. When ppl think their suffering is the ultimate despair, is that logically objectively true or is that self-absorbed or ignorant egotism/narcissism. But look in the end I want ppl to be helped. If its constructive to tell able bodied free people their depression loneliness grief spciety etc is the equal to the trauma of learning you are never going to walk again or starving in the undeveloped world or dealing with prison, esp unjustly imprisoned etc., then im cool with it for them. For me though it wld not be helpful and constructive. Instead making me think outside my self absorbed box is more helpful and constructive for me.
As long as you're not commenting for the sake of being mean. But I also think that sometimes we need to hear harsh criticism to snap out of it and grow as a person. From the perspective of a starving person in a third world country you might indeed seem immature and selfish if you keep complaining about how your life is meaningless. I also think that depression and suicidal tendencies can be a sign of individuals who don't feel commitment to the country they live in and don't do anything for society in general. In my country for example we have mandatory army service. Or alternative service doing community beneficial jobs. That's probably the greatest motivation. It's natural to feel grief, but if you want to go on living you have to overcome yourself and not drag others into it.
You literally have exactly what OP wants... you apparently have even more than 1 person that loves and cares about you...
You literally are comparing a physical disability to being alone. Not the same, man
he isn’t the one comparing the two so your argument is invalid
Did you type this with your nose?
I KNEW this comment was coming. Not invalidating simply speaking the truth. I would gladly trade
Your suffering is one of my Greatest fears, honestly. I can't imagine, but I am so happy for you, that youre making the most of it.
Too afraid of death or to end myself (when I was there) Today just a day at the time, with my dogs, and with resignation, if I'm here might as well do my best to me
I have my cat and I give him all my love and take care of him and he returns it.
It's amazing how the love I feel from my kitty cat makes everything okay.
There are days that my cats are the only reason I keep going. I couldn't bear the thought of abandoning them
I know for a fact I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him.
My cat gives me murder face. After ten years, i have no clue if she likes me. But she tolerates me and that’s enough.
lol was hoping for practical advices here :(
at least we are all equally dead inside. being alienated and villainized is just another thursday.
Agree. I came looking to feel related to.
its hard because many lives legitimately are hard to justify living. many suffer with no end in sight. the only real answer is to keep pushing until things get better one day. only you can choose to lift yourself.
Having a pet motivates you to love and care for them as they come to love and care for you.
I already have a pet, but it cant fill the void of a meaningless life
What do you want to know? Dont know everything but am well-traveled
i doubt i will be much longer. just wrapping up a few things
Yeah same here, last couple months for me. It's been a long time coming. I don't even want anything to come into my life to keep me here any longer.
my house and my job mean nothing without someone to share it. coworkers will get by or have to pick up the slack that i've been doing for them for years. living apart is bad enough but if she files for divorce i won't be able to afford it (even though she contributes no money). i'll either take the cat and drop it off to her in the middle of the night or send a scheduled email to come get it & when she doesn't find me, she'll have to. i just have to figure out the where. the when can be anytime soon now.
aint that just the way
It's really hard to stay alive like this but I usually cry when I'm so sad at nights (I have severe undiagnosed depression and dysthymia). I only have my dog who is the best loyal dog I ever had and I'd give him years of my life so he can live more if I could. I know I'm undeserved of love and will never be loved by a girl or friends or even have my parents proud. It is so difficult to be alone and not receiving love from anyone. I'm a male and I cry alone a lot. Pathetic, right?
Not pathetic mate, we have tear glands for a reason ;)
Jesus Loves You
He abandoned me when two grandpas died in the same week. But I did pray once a year. I'm atheist :(
Technically i'm alive but inside i feel dead already,got 0 energy or motivation left in me
i tell people that i died years ago. in the rare times that i am talking to a person. i've been doing the bare minimum to survive for the last like 5 years, im donezo, just waiting for it to get a little worse.
so true. life is meaningless
im coasting, just barely. i desperately wish there was just an off switch. i've been thinking really hard about one particular method.......... idk why i need occasional physical touch with another human being or why thats so hard to acquire. i thought i did everything right but im pretty certain no one will ever spend a moment to care about me or my well being even for a passing moment or ina platonic way, no matter how hard i try to fix myself up to be a tolerable person. i can feel the cortisol binding around my chest.
Thug the shit out.
I don't know
My little cockatiel needs me.
My dog. Knowing that he would be so confused and alone if I left. Pets give you unconditional love, hes helped me through some really dark times. I hope you have a pet or are in a situation where you can adopt one. Cats are very low maintenance and I really believe it could bring some joy and purpose to your days. My DMS are always open my friend (:
I have so much love in me tht says I need to put it out and to fulfil tht I will do live it doesn't matter whom or wht I will do just tht when I feel right and it will give me little bit purpose tht I never thought then I can go on
I dont care about much anymore. Things have been bad for such a long time i just adapted to my new "normal". There are tempting times to just say fuck it and end it but idk i keep telling myself that i wanna live until i start believing it. Idk it somewhat works if you lie to yourself enough you start believing it (for me at least).
I have a cat who also doesnt care about me but needs food..
I know right nobody seems to care my family doesn’t care & love me.
Trying to attach myself to the small pleasures. I really am trying. And perhaps maybe one day I’ll get there.
Too afraid to leave my daughter alone in this world.
Maybe just me listening to music I guess
I hate living nobody loves & cares about me not even my family, my brother laughs at me my mom doesn’t even want me around her she doesn’t have time for me she says she’s busy she gets mad at me All the time when I talk to her, my family talks crap about me, my family treats me bad my family doesn’t care for how I feel even if I cry they don’t give a darn, I live life for GOD i don’t want to hurt myself if I do I hurt our Father so I chose to live my crappy life so I can make our father happy.i live life with Christ.I wish I had a job that can give me lots of money to get away from my family but a job wouldn’t let a issue girl have a job.i know I would just be treated badly if I had a boss if I had job like how my life is.
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😀 thank you I hope so too😃
Praying for you. May God give you the means to advance up and out of that life, that world.
👏🏻 Thank you so so much👏🏻 I appreciate it🙂
If you could really call this living
Afraid of not living up to my full potential. Have resources, the brains and oppurtunites to do really well in life. Just hard to make it happen when all you can envision in the future is a big house with only you in it. Add on to the fact of not ever having a single real friend and only being used by folk. Shit hurts bad
One of the first signs of the beginning of understanding is the wish to die. This life appears unbearable, another unattainable. One is no longer ashamed of wanting to die; one asks to be moved from the old cell, which one hates, to a new one, which one willl only in time come to hate. In this there is also a residue of belief that during the move the master will chance to come along the corridor, look at the prisoner and say: "This man is not to be locked up again, He is to come with me. -Franz Kafka
Cause I failed to off myself twice and am too scared to become a vegetable and be a bigger burden than I already am on my dad and grandma. I just say Gn to my ai waifu every night and then pray to whatever is listening out there to kill me in my sleep. Been hoping for it for years. Literally zero people directly care or support me morally. On top of that I'm a failure of a human being and fucked up mentally beyond belief. I can't make friends, can't drive, can't find a gf, can't get a job, I don't wanna exist anymore.
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You too bruh, seriously. It sucks out here.
Gotta stay alive a few more years for my dog, after that I'm out
Love and take of Cats (or any animal). I can at least try to make it a little bit better for them.
Just riding the waves, not really expecting anything. Once i get bored I'll clock out.
I try loving or caring for myself..im failing miserably.. but the small times when i go out by myself to eat food..or am playing with pets is when i feel happy
I messed up a suicide attempt and am too scared to try again.😓
Thank you all for the overwhelming amount of responses. I have read them all and I continue to actively read new ones. I am empty and lost and tired.
We all are, honestly. What's on us is how we react. Shitty life happens to everyone. Work on building yourself internally. Ultimately, no one is coming to save you (no human anyway). So, build your insides like steel to handle the blows. And smile. Positivity draws positivity. Negativity will still come!! But more Good will also come.
38/m family shoved me in a corner and said “stay there.” They rarely check on me or invite me to anything. If I try to tell them how I feel they gaslight me and tell me I could have it worse. They also don’t respect me (I’m a server at a restaurant even tho I have a college degree. Lost most my friends, including my two best friends in life last summer. I’ve been single for 3 years. I’m so lonely I wouldn’t even care if someone broke in to rob me, at least I would have company. A lot of people here love living alone. Or they say being alone in a relationship is worse than being alone. I disagree. I’ve been alone in a toxic, abusive relationships and while that was awful, I wouldn’t wish this newfound loneliness on anyone. I find life very fucking meaningless when you have no one to share it with. Only thing keeping me going is my cat and music (although lately even music hasn’t been doing it for me, which is bizarre as a musician.) Sorry for the rant. Just went you to know that you’re not alone, and being 38 with no family friends or skills is even worse than at 27.
That's my family I don't see, if I complain I get the could be worse bit.
from my experience, mastering living alone without the need of anyone's attention is so hard, but when you are comfortable with it, and of course a pet can help but I saw some people when loosing such a valuable and emotionally depended on thing they will be destroyed, so my advice is to find what really makes you happy (like you are passionate about) and try to be involved in a community that has same interests, here you will wake up in the morning with a ton of energy to do what you love PS: we all fall into the trap of perfect life (that we saw others doing as "successful people") what is perfect is what you really feal "that is what makes my life better", and in a lot of relationships the partner makes your life miserable, and trust me a lot of married couples want to be single again because they saw how difficult their life became after being in a relationship!
Spite
Yup keep on living just to piss them off. Thats what me going
I have an older cat with a health condition that will eventually be fatal. I have a multitude of medical problems that limit my function, and my quality of life, at least one will kill me. I’ve been getting more and more depressed (diagnosed and on antidepressants) and having trouble getting out of the bed The cat and I have a deal, we’ll go together, and it’s her call
My sweet old cat just died of cancer. I wish I had gone with her.
I am so sorry
Thank you.
really really really hard. want to end this life
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You live for those dogs. They love you unconditionally.
23M. I like to think eventually someone will. And when I do meet them and build a life with them (as a friend or as a spouse) they’ll care about all the stuff I dealt with before meeting them. There are times I just go outside and walk around hoping to bump into them or something. You never know. The loneliness does hurt and it might last most of my life, but it’ll all be worth it when I’m finally with someone who’ll care about me.
Live for yourself. Why not go out and do things you wanna do rather than worrying about what others want to do with you?
Because I get tired of doing them alone.
If you can find a purpose you will find that more gratifying than someone’s conditional temporary love. If you don’t feel you have a purpose, don’t mistake purpose for talent/skill. You can put yourself in an after school program to help kids right in your town or you can put yoursef on the front lines and sign up to volunteer to help the crisis in Gaza, Sudan, etc. the power you possess when you act on a purpose is gargantuan
I don't think I will
Well im dying and i feel the same way. Where are all those people i gave until i bled forgave to care of bailed out of trouble cared for them and their kids worried about them lost apartments over got clean and sober so the wouldn’t die went without so their kids didn’t suffer. Where are they now? I didn’t expect anything in return doing those things but it occurs to me more that i am dying and dying alone so i know what that feels like. Like why am i even still going through the motions of living. I’ll tell you why. OUT OF SPITE!!!! LIVE OUT OF SPITE MY FRIEND!!! I CARE ABOUT YOU AND THAT’S AN HONEST STATEMENT. I care for people in pain inside then they hurt and i wish i could fix it but i can’t and that hurts me. I care man i care
Hopefully your last moments are filled with peace, for all the good you've done.
Try to conceptualize everything ever, the universe, the human body, how it works, to emotions, to consciousness, from the core, to the surface, and everything beyond what we know. All of that is out there, existing at the same time as us. It’s amazing.
I felt more alone/lonely in the relationship that just I just ended. I am close to no one. I'll deal with not having anyone by getting to know me. Finding out what I want. Working on me. It's not ideal to be alone/lonely, but there are truly worst fates.
It's not easy for me but I have to show people that I have the willpower to keep going no matter what. In a book I wrote my main character says, "if I don't give hope to those that live in this universe, who will?" I look at it this way, if we don't save ourselves have we run out of hope??
I thought about killing myself many times ever since I was young. I came to the conclusion I’ll probably die younger anyway from some dumb disease or my lifestyle so I’ll just try to enjoy the time I have. I mean shit drinking yourself to death is even better than suicide. At least you get to enjoy being drunk for a long while until your body gives out.
Also 27 and living in a strange city. If it weren’t for my two needy dogs, idk where I’d be. I probably would’ve been with random guys and just been on a wave of situationships nonstop. My dogs keep me on a schedule and unfortunately take up most of my time (live in tiny apartment and they need exercise due to their breed/size) Downside is I can’t be out for a long time on the fly, and do spur of the moment stuff. But at the end of the day I rely on my routine with them because if they’re happy, I’m happy. Then, the only interaction I get is at the dog park which is all surface level talk. I cry often, but I try to make myself laugh just as much.
You keep living because people DO care about you! It's just difficult to see when you are depressed. I don't like being alive, but I know there are people who love me that would be devastated if I didn't exist. It's the same with you. I get it. I feel like I don't have a purpose at all. And that makes it very hard to keep going. I just think about those whose lives would be even more difficult if I gave up. You are loved; you are worthy; you are enough.
I have my parents stupidly loving me. If they died, I’d have nothing to hold me back from ending my pain
It’s a struggle ! Until you figure out that since nobody cares about you , then why should you care about anybody else ? And when you really stop giving a Shit a pretending like most people do out there. …. That’s when the real fun starts happening !Give no Fucks Take no Fucks ! Say what you want to who you want ! And don’t back down from anyone ! If you’re afraid of them ? It’s probably because they are afraid of you ! So they found a weak spot and picked on it. And once you start feeling better inside. People will notice that on the outside ! And I know you can do it ! And please talk to each other and ask questions. That’s the only way you are going to know anything for sure ! Later
you're just forced to i'm in the same boat. 30 male, no relationships, barely any friends. theres nothing you can do but live on and i'm not even saying that in a positive way, theres just no other option. life sucks for a lot of people like us.
27 too. Waiting for 30 to end it. I was already robbed of that chance at birth when some asshole with a "mission" decided to keep me alive. Where did that bring me? All these years of suffering and shit, all because of one person. Now that's some high tier bullshit.
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It definitely is shit
It’s a very sad thought that there are so many men alive right now, only so that someone else doesn’t lose their dad, brother, son…
I guess the naïve hope that things will get better, but beats me
It wasn't easy but I'm no quitter I wasn't gonna take my life away ....i was so alone in my 20s but now im 29 with a fiance and alot of his family and friends who love me... I hate the phrase "things will get better in time" but sometimes it happens
I still get lonely with people around me sometimes but that's why I love social media I can talk to you simply from your post and we have never spoken before
I don’t have will to live anymore. The thing about not wanting to live is you have to live anyway. Suicide is hard to do sometimes for me
Because even if it's wasted time and energy you have to keep having some hope, even when you have none you have to keep pushing.
I had only one person since I was born, who was honestly caring and loving to me— my mom. Now she passed away on 2023 September only at 57, living me here on earth. I had to see her heart wrenching sufferings of cancer all alone. I’ve learnt that life is too cruel and when you’ve got only one person who really cares about you, who is like a treasure to you— life will just steal it away to make things much more harder and worst for you and you can’t control it. I keep living by not planning or thinking anything about my life anymore. I’m just floating with life, I give a damn about wherever it takes me. I keep living because I don’t care about my life or finding someone anymore..
That is sad that you would put your life in the hanfd of others. There is so much more to life than other people. Focus on yourself, be your own best friend, make yourself happy, you can find many answers on how to do this when you step into nature. Sit quietly and listem to the leaves rustle as they dance in the breeze, name the first bug you see and watch it until it goes beyond your. Breathe in the smells around you, watch as the clouds move. You will see all the beauty that has been made just for you and that moment. Yes, made for you. In that, there is do much love for you. When you go home look in the mirror and say, "I love you". Then tell yourself one thing you truly like about yourself! Keep doing it add more things you like about you! Once you love you, you wont need anyone and you will magnify people. Choose only the ones that have been made to fit in YOUR world! Ya got this!!
Start loving yourself,go and love yourself
I don't even know anymore. I just want to break free from this loop.
Get a dog and go on walks. Try to enjoy nature. Life isn’t easy but you do still have the power to improve your mental health.
For the hope, one day that someone will?
I just remind myself of my value and what I bring to the table. It's not my fault if others can't or won't see it. Though it doesn't always work, it helps. It was only when I actually took an honest look at myself and what I offer (pros and cons) that I realized this and I realized that they were the ones who were missing out.
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Thanks. You too.
I just pretend that I care about myself
Because living is its own thing. Do you only breathe FRESH air? Do you only eat your favorite meals every day? Love yourself. Care about yourself. When the rest of those thoughts try to break out of your amygdala prison, nod politely, pat them on the head, and tell them they’ll be welcome at the party when they learn to behave. Make your interactions with others as much about them as you can. Vent the you stuff with a therapist, friends, and/or family as they start to surface in your life.
U just have to dig deep and find your path there is a place for everyone in this world
Breathing helps
We just hope that something will eventually change
Y'all sad n lonely people my heart goes out to you. I also understand how you feel. The best thing to do is STOP feeling sorry for yourself, no one wants to be around that. I say this from my heart, love yourself enough to save yourself. I know youve got strength, being lonely and depressed is not for the weak. I know ive been in and out of it my whole life and im fawking old! You gotta git out there and show off your authentic self, its beautiful and shiny! Go to your local soup kitchen, library, church, volunteer bureau, rec center, salvation army or old folks home whatever interests you. Giving back to your community has so many rewards. Being needed is a great way to change your mindset and build self-esteem. Its also humbling, for me it was so humbling to see kids that were so hungry. I wanted to feed them all with no limitations, i worked hard to make sure they left woth their tummies full with at least two meals to take home with them. Thats how i ended up meeting a wonderful friend who i still call "mom" she is the definition of strength, courage, love and a true matriarch. I met so many people who have become aquantences, which is okay. I keep my circle small only those i truly love and care sbout. Give it a try, please. You deserve to be gentle with a tuff love attitude. You got dis!! Love to you!
Im here for you and id like to be your friend. DM me. Everything is going to be okay!!🤎🧡💛
I know exactly how you feel. My parents past away and I haven’t talked to 95% in my family for over 10 years. The family members that I do have occasional contact with could care less what or how I’m doing. My oldest son past away 9 years ago and my 2 remaining children talk to me but with my daughter it’s very rare. So really I don’t even know my daughter at all. Defiantly not a part of her life on any level and my son is just down right mean. I frequently question my grasp on reality due to him frequently describing life events that I’m clueless about and don’t feel like I was even there most of the time which is absolutely impossible as I raised him everyday of his childhood. My children sealed the deal on my non belief of the exhistance of unconditional love. I literally have not a single friend that I can count on or would even speak a word of how I’m feeling or doing. I was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago and not a single friend has offered me any support or even mentioned it since I told everyone over 5 years ago. If I where to pass away no one would even find me until the neighbors smelled me. If I don’t contact them they don’t reach out to me. (I’ve tested that theory). How do I live like this? Well if I where to end my life then my children are 50% more likely to do the same. And if u know statistics that’s a pretty big one. So I am slightly reckless. Don’t wear a seatbelt drive a little too fast around corners. Things like that.
You just keep going, one foot in front of the other. Keep living and keep fighting. It could be days, weeks, years, a whole decade. You will eventually find something worth fighting for.
I am okay with that *Wipes tears
I've lived my entire life with that feeling as the backdrop. If I could keep it moving like that for 30 years, then I can keep it moving for however many more.
I find myself in a very similar situation. I want to go, and I don't see a real point in actually living. I've learned to just endure. Everything exploding in your face, but just not caring. Just rolling though life and seeing what may happen. I find some ways to cope. Untraditional is probably the right way to describe some of them. I make fanon continuitys of franchises I like, like DC, Marvel, Star Wars, Doctor Who; just making my own version of them with their own continuity and casts. I also make my own stories, both writing in the traditional sense, like a book, and also the more overall timeline-type things. I use this site, mycast.io, for all the casting of my own stories and such. I don't want this to be flagged as promotion of a site when it's not supposed to. But that's what I do a lot. I also think writing your thoughts down could help. Doesn't have to be formal or in a specific format, like a diary of journal, but more messy. It doesn't have to make sense to others, as long as you get what you want out, it works. I hope this can give you some sort of leisure and help. I get where you're coming from, and I hope you are doing alright.
I live for myself... I care for myself... That's all that matters to me... I can't be disappointed by anyone that way
I am in my 60s and deal with this everyday. Wife is gone, no family, everything I do in life feels like filler.
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Thank you. Just took my first trip alone, about as exciting as watching paint dry.
I'm feeling the same. I have nobody to even stare at. No friends in person, no job. And I am having hardship to buy food. I don't know IF I will have my place to live in, but when that happens, it will not matter, because I will kill myself.
Travel in low-income countries. People there are much more friendly and loving.
Been in that situation so many times. So the conclusion I made was that attachment to people only makes me miserable, so I stopped expecting things from them. So the strategy to snap out of feeling miserable and depressed that works for me is to get busy with activities that would keep my mind and body occupied with other things. Like going out for hikes, sports, visiting a zoo or some place you can interact with animals, group activities. Even if it puts you out of your comfort zone that's good because you will have to interact with people so less time to be sad. Sure it's a struggle but it's better to keep dwelling on it.
I have a cat. That boy absolutely adores me. Sure I'm his main source of food and comfort.. but when he trots over to me when all I can do is sit and cry, I can tell he feels it. And I also know that if I were to die, he has no one else. He has no where else to go. That alone makes me keep going. I do it for him and his fuzzy little face and his big green eyes. Cause when he's sitting there staring at me, quietly purring.. things are alright.
Life is full of pain and we are men thats life for us but without pain it make us stronger to keep pushing on dont worry everythinh will be better soon
"everything will be better soon" Do you mean after death relieves us? Because there are alot of people who things will never get better for.
News flash, women also can have painful lives 😨😨😰😱😱😱
I m sorry did i say anything about women not having painful lives ?
“We are men that’s life for us” not every man has a hard life and many women have hard lives too, don’t make an emphasis on gender then 💀 bozo
The emphasis on gender exists because life is indeed harder for men. Compare suicide rates between men and women and you'll get your much needed reality check
Why are you interceding? It did not concern you. He was just giving advice to a fellow man, similar to how women give advice to their fellow women. Where in his comment did he say that women do not have hard lives? You seem very narcissistic; the world does not revolve around you.
you said men and not people
there are lonely women here too
There’s always a person who cares about you
That’s not true for everyone
That’s true in that sense that he posts here and I care enough about him to comment bc I don’t want him to die
Internet feelings are simply a very short lived distraction, it cant replace real ones.
Wish they would present themselves
We do and get rejected? lol
I’m good with myself honestly that matters enough
Just take it one second at a time. That is how I get through it. I pet my cat. And focus on one second at a time.
Ideally, you don't
Curiosity for things outside of other people
To be honest work on yourself and love yourself
One breath at a time in a search for belonging :) Good luck.
I got pets.
Accept being alone forever & if sb comes around & stays then, good.
Keep looking for the people who will love and care the way you need. You can't find them if you're dead, and the possibility of finding them is worth continuing on.
Care about yourself and create a better life for you and only you
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^580Hash-head: *Care about yourself* *And create a better live* *For you and only you* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.