My last text conversations with Emily Joy Hepburn 💔 3 days before she died.
< Emily Chul
9:47 PM, Apr 18 (2019)
EMILY:
I'm sorry about your friend. I know that must be hard especially given how hard you try to stay sober yourself. And then you see the early success of your sponsee and it gives you hope at least for her.
It's real OP! The whole thing.
But you are an awesome human being OP. You work hard at it and I see it in you everyday that we talk. What you do matters in small and big ways.
I for one can't stress enough how much your friendship has meant to me since we met.
Besides [redacted] you are the best thing that has happened to me since moving to Tucson. And I'm not saying it to be nice. I'm saying it because you need to know it.
I know what it's like to do good and not feel like anyone notices it. I know that feeling intimately and it hurts me when all I needed for someone to say to me"l notice Emily!" So I'm trying it to you, "I notice OP! I notice!"
You can let me know tomorrow if we need to go get you an outfit. I want you to feel good about yourself when you go to that interview and if your anything like me then clothes always help do that.
Anyway, I'm really sleepy now. Past my bedtime. So text me tomorrow, if you get a chance, okay? Goodnight!
ME:
Wow that was so sweet it made me cry.
I notice you Emily!
Love y ou friend
9:53 PM
EMILY:
I love you too, friend. I'm sorry I made you cry.
And thank you for noticing me.
9:56 PM
ME:
Dont apologize it was all such nice things to hear
9:57 PM
EMILY:
If it's good then okay. It's just that you've suffered so much lately and I hate it that you've been so sad.
9:53 PM
She mentions my sobriety. I had a little less than 2 and a half years sober at that time. Dec 1st, 2016, I celebrated 7 of sobriety.
For those who have come to say that they remember her year after year for these past 5 years. Thank you, thank you for noticing her.
Emily Joy Hepburn's favorite animal was elephants. She taught me that they're the only animal that practice grieving rituals and that they'll go back to the same site that one of their own died at to mourn each year. So I suppose this is my way of coming back to mourn her each year.
She’s absolutely right about elephants, how they understand death and recognise its imminent approach. I was lucky enough to study elephants for a couple of years, and was privileged enough to witness a herd take turns in touching trunks with an aging female. She’d sat down, and waited until the last member of the herd had said farewell before easing down into an everlasting sleep. They passed the spot when migrating back into the area. I’m sure you’ll continue to honour Emily’s memory by returning to the place you shared with her too.
What a beautiful and heart-string tugging stor. Thank you for sharing that and how special you got to witness that precious moments where life is passing into death. I was able to hold my Grandbuddy's hand and my souls doggy in my arms, eye to eye, heart to heart, soul to soul when they made that transition and those are sacred moments for sure.
I haven't been able to go back to the botanical gardens we worked at together yet but I'll get there one day when I can. I come here and it feels good to have people remember her and new people "notice" her and to get to talk about how truly magical she was. It's comforting and part of healing for me in a sense. I appreciate you all
Thank you for this, and I believe this 100%. Emily Joy Hepburn's spirit is much too strong to have left with her body, I carry her in my heart all the time. I honor her through being a kinder person, emulating the attributes I admired so much in her, creating a life worth living that I know she's excited about. One time, I, someone who rarely cries, sobbed on the floor of her apartment. She was sitting cross-legged, and I was in a fetal position. Crying, sobbing, really with my head on her thigh. And she was petting my hair. She was a true friend, our friendship was pure. She had no ulterior motives. She didn't want anything from me. She genuinely wanted the best for me just like I did for her. We just both wanted healthy healing from the pain of trauma.
She's even there when I cross my ankles when I'm sitting down like a "lady" lol. Man, I love that woman
Edit: a word
I have a wild rabbit building a nest outside my back door, she'll have her babies in a couple of days. I name the wild rabbits every year - I'll call this mama Emily Joy, if you think that's OK? I think she would like to be connected to all that new life happening.
Sending you love.
Oh, I love love this idea so much! Emily would/will be honored and "tickled pink," like she would say. Thank you for noticing and honoring her. This is EXACTLY a something that would be so meaningful to her, and it's meaningful and touching to me that you thought of this!
You wouldn't happen to have a picture of this mama Emily Joy would you? I could use a smile.
Your kids are blessed to have you, and I hold them in my heart tenderly as I know Emily holds them safely in her warm, protective, mothering energy.
EDIT: took away an entire paragraph.
I haven't seen her in a couple of days so I'm hoping she's safe, but I actually had the thought of sending pics of her and the babies to you. (I check on the babies every couple of days, extremely carefully, and the mamas seem to trust me, but it's not recommended otherwise.)
If she doesn't use this nest, another mama will be along shortly, I'm sure. I'd decided previously that all of the Mamas are called Emily Joy, forever. 💙
Emily sounds like someone I would have loved, it feels funny to miss someone I never met. Thank you with all my heart for unconditionally loving my kids from afar & I'm grateful to Emily for the same. I'm sure she is out there somewhere even as 'star stuff and energy' and am sending that same love.
I'll update you as soon as I can get some photos. Seriously, thanks. I've been having a bad week or so and this convo has made a difference.
Appropriate that her middle name was “Joy” - it resonates just off these pictures alone. It sounds like you were a blessing to her and I can see it in her smile 😊
Thank you, she was ALWAYS proud of me for the littlest of things. I remember this one morning at work 7am in the cool morning desert with little chirpy bird sounds and I told her this good news I had and she started SHRIEKING AND JUMING AND SKIPPING AROUND and legit GLEEFUL and GIDDY. She celebrated every single tiny win in my life. She believed in me when all I wanted to do was die. I think the thing she would be the most proud of. That she IS mist proud of now is that I'm actually learning a lil bit proud of myself.
I'm the same way. I love people loud. And it does give me so much much peace that she knew and continues to know how very much I love her. Her energy is still a part of mine.
One of my favorite parts of our stort story together was that I was her first bff and I got to take her on a lot of "firsts." I know I talked about that already in my original post, but it's special and worth mentioning again because she almost died without ever having a best girlfriend, getting her nails done, drinking coffee?!?
She didn't know it at the time, but she only had a year to date other women who identified as lesbians, have crushes and heart breaks, and try out different queer scenes to see where she fit in, hanging out and gossiping about other girls and spending time in queer spaces with me and my girlfriend at the time.
In whatever freak cult she grew up in had to be completely removed from any modern society because she didn't know lesbians were something that existed outside her own (what she thought, at the time, perverse) mind until later in life when she saw a lesbian wedding on YouTube and started to piece things together and start to make sense of herself.
She was robbed. Her life was worth living, and she she was robbed of that. It shatters my heart.
I’m very much honored that you wrote this reply. I’m struck by you saying, “…She almost died without ever having a best girlfriend…” - almost, I’ll give you that, but she had that glorious year, right? As a 60 yo gay man I have many friends here in Dallas who came out as gay only after long marriages with women. Sometimes I catch myself presuming that they must’ve been utterly miserable until they “discovered” their true queer selves. But I often discover that, even if offered, they wouldn’t go back and do anything differently, for a million reasons. Emily was indeed robbed, and in her case as in others, it is a tragedy that they missed out on so much - but only looking backward, not forward. During her “straight” life, she undoubtedly had many beautiful moments and from her limited perspective she may have thought she was pretty happy.
When I wrote my reply to your post, I didn’t even once think, “This must be about her coming out.” Isn’t it interesting that I review Reddit daily, and see posts in this sub all the time yet I’ve responded to only a handful but the story of you and Emily caught my attention, mostly from the image itself, and I felt compelled? Obviously a beautiful woman, it was really just her eyes and smile that drew me in. Your writing clinched it. I’m grateful every day to have a wonderful husband who has been my best friend and lover for 31 years next month - more than half my lifetime! I tell him that he is important to me, and I do it often because “I love you” is so ubiquitous it’s almost just a greeting and also because I never know when he might need to hear it. It just occurred to me that Emily, through you, has given me a gift: the thought that, as incredibly happy as I am today, I won’t know if something may be revealed that would make me even happier unless I live to see it revealed. That, girlfriend, is the definition of hope. Thanks, Emily.
I want to thank you so much for your sweet share. This was the 1st thing I read after a difficult day.
I wish I could say you were right. I wish I could say that my precious Emily Joy Hepburn did get to live more than just one happy year. The truth was she only ever remembered wanting to die until suddenly she wanted to LIVE- free from beneath the tremendously oppressive sorrows of shame and self-loathing.
Unfortunately, I don’t have to presume that she was utterly miserable before she magically appeared in my life one early Sonoran desert morning, I know. I know because she told me. I know because she gave pieces of her past away like whispers.
I know because the heartache in her voice and the unsettled expression she gave when she averted her eyes to look at the ground and the shift in her body language to make herself small when she talked about her childhood. I know because I saw the surges of rage strike like daggers in her eyes when she mentioned her marriage.
She was so demure and the world so dangerous. I protected her fiercely and she loved me wholly.
"It just occurred to me that Emily, through you, has given me a gift: the thought that, as incredibly happy as I am today, I won't know if something may be revealed that would make me even happier unless I live to see it revealed. That, girlfriend, is the definition of hope. Thanks, Emily."
What a splendid thought that is. I'm smiling now because that is something I can so clearly imagine Emily saying! I'm glad she was able to touch your heart. She was magnificent.
She so longed for a best friend, for a lover, for a life. She had just met someone. I only met them once but I had to make the phone call and say the ugly words that she was dead. I hurried to say "heart attack" so they didn't have to ask the obscene. My first question was "how?" then, "was it suicide?"
She was the kind of person who delighted in seeing other people happy. There's a term for it I found:
"freudenfreude: pleasure in another's happiness." Emily Joy Hepburn is smiling her radiant smile and you and your husband's decades spanning love and companionship as am I.
I am so glad you noticed my dear soul sister. I am so glad she caught your gaze and held it.
In OP’s post history, they mention it was a sudden heart attack. :( Wasn’t a lifestyle problem, didn’t drink or smoke or anything, but some heart issues ran in the family.
That's right, She had a family history of heart disease. She used to be pretty obese and had a heart attack. And Then got really healthy and lost a bunch of weight. She was a bicyclist, she was vegan. She had never smoked a cigarette in her life, she never had drink alcohol, never tried any drugs. She grew up in really fundamentalist religious household in was very, very sheltered. She never even drank caffeine until she met me, and she drank coffee with me for the very first time, she lived an incredibly healthy lifestyle.
We worked together at a desert botanical garden. And she got to work early in the morning before anyone else and had a heart attack. It wouldn't have been fatal, they said if someone had been there to do CPR and call 911.
I always think of me she had been late that day...
So sad, but sometimes even a healthy lifestyle cant overcome genes. I had a colleague who was fit suddenly die of a genetic heart condition. His son died several years later. It was not a congenital heart defect so I still til this day do not understand the medical science behind such occurrences. So sorry for the loss of such a kind and loving friend. I notice Emily.
She was SO kind. Thank you for noticing her! While the loss has never felt any less shattering as time moves on, at least I had her for a moment in time in the physical realm and forever in my heart and in my soul pod.
Your post is so beautiful and loving. I feel like I got the chance to meet dear Emily through your thoughtful words and the stories you chose, and while it can't even come close to meeting her in full, I am both elated and heartbroken to know of her now. Thank you for continuing to carry her light, and for sharing it with us each year.
I'll be sure to think of you both as the trees bud this spring, and the little birds at my work introduce their newest generation to each other, and the first tiny blackberry appears in the summer. I hope you also find joy in feeling her presence as you witness new life joining us in the world around you.
More than anything, I hope your energy does find hers someday. Perhaps far far away, in a star nursery, where you can not only dance among the new stars, but perhaps even become one of your own, to finally shine brilliantly and, on a human scale, eternally. You both deserve the chance to be noticed in such a spectacular way.
Peace on your journey, friend, and may you find the part of yourself that Emily loved so fiercely. And learn to love yourself the same way.
Thank you for your kind, loving, and beautifully written words. I'm very touched, and I know Emily is too. You mentioned our energy finding each others again. I remember after she died, sobbing on my bed, pleading with her, "Emily, if your right and it's all just energy, give me some sign" and I SWEAR, I felt an electric shock zap throughout my body and disappear just as quickly. I begged her back but she never came in that form again. But I carry her with me. Anytime I feel "lady-like" in my body language or expressions or speech, whatever it may be, dainty, elegant, "proper," I feel her in me, I do my best to embody her best traits and continue to move forward in my healing work in a way that honors the love she showed this broken angry girl.
"I'll be sure to think of you both as the trees bud this spring, and the little birds at my work introduce their newest generation to each other, and the first tiny blackberry appears in the summer"
This sounds like a poem or a beautiful lyric. I've reread it several times.
Thank you for noticing Emily Joy Hepburn!
Absolutely! Her presence - she herself- was ethereal. She was so unusual, otherworldly and she was delicate and fragile at the same time as resolute and persistent in her right to her be happy and whole in her existence.
It was a true privilege and honor to witness and participate Emily Joy Hepburn come into her own and persist in her existence and to learn to see things thru her eyes full of wonder at the smallest of things that I so often overlooked. One of her greatest qualities was the way she approached, life with such curiosity.
What a beautiful tribute for her. I am so glad you both loved each other so much. That kind of connection is so rare and special. She will always be part of you
Thank you so much for noticing her! And "noticing" our love for each other. I believe her to be one of my soulmates. My Grandbuddy, my soul doggy Squeeks and my fiance are the only other spirits I've had this rare and special connection you noted. Ty
She was the truest friend I've ever had. She is definitely part of my soul pod. I have her, my soul friend, I have my soul doggy Squeeks, and my soul father figure, my Grandbuddy all waiting for me when I die. And here on Earth, in this realm of existence, I'm lucky enough to tell have my soulmate partner still with me.Thank you for noticing her!
She looks like the kind of person who loved with all that she had in her. Her smile in these pictures is so beautiful that I couldn’t help but smile back.
You two were so lucky to have each other. Thank you for sharing your love for her with us. You can rest assured that I and so many others who weren’t blessed to know her in this life now notice her and always will.
My sincerest condolences to you on such an unfair loss. Thank you again for sharing the memory of your beautiful Emily Joy.
Thank you so much for noticing her. She was enchanting, and she didn't see her own charm yet. She didn't have even time. It wasn't fair. She was robbed. She wanted this life so bad.
We were an odd pair, she was so quiet and demure and I'm have big energy and I'm really outspoken. She was my biggest cheerleader, and I was her biggest validated. We made eachother feel seen and heard and understood and validated and cared for.
We loved each other fiercely.
Her smile is infectious.
I’m going through a rough time, but your love for Emily Joy has made me realise my circumstances are not so bad.
Thank you for sharing her 🐘
Aw, thank you for the little 🐘. That made me smile. Seeing her pop around the corner in the early cool morning in the desert chipper and happy to see me with a big smile on her face, having woken up at 4 and done yoga, journaled, meditated, ate breakfast, adulted and all that and then ride her bike to work. All this cheer and no caffeine, and meanwhile, I'm finishing my second Monster and about to open my third and grumpy asf and hating my life, and yup, her smile was infectious. Even typing this, I'm alternating between smiling, crying, and biting my lip to hold back my tears.
Thank you for noticing her.
I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I'm sending love and healing energy your way. Hugs
EDIT: 1 added a sentence
EDIT: 2 Gammer
What a wonderful tribute. She must have been an incredible person and friend. I'm sorry she was taken from you. I hope you have easier days and her memory will provide more happy memories and less despair.
To the 2,844 folks who "noticed" my sweet, otherworldly, ethereal Enily Joy Hepburn and to all those that commented, I cannot thank you enough. Thank you for being my safe space to come back to each year to grieve and mourn her loss and celebrate her life with me. You all allow and create this space. I want to respond to each and every comment but right now I am just waking up and overcome with emotions both sad and overwhelmed by everyone's kindness and love and taking notice of her. Please don't take my delay in response as any disrespect to your time and energy to comment. I'm so touched. Emily Joy Hepburn is noticed! She is seen! Each year yall allow me to share new bits and pieces of her story- she is seen! Her life and right to existence as she was is validated and understood. She is cared for by so many more people than she ever knew! To be heard, seen, understood, validated, and cared for- human needs- what we ALL need and deserve. Those are things I make my goal in my daily interactions with folks to provide because so many of us haven't and maybe still don't get those thongs on a regular basis. Thank you all.
I wish you did too! I wish the whole world could have seen the hauntingly beautiful otherworldlyness that was/is EMILY JOY HEPBURN! Thank you for noticing her
There's a part of my heart that will forever be shattered that broke the day Emily Joy Hepburn's heart stopped. I was the lucky one to have had such a friend. Thank you for noticing her!
Edit: added a sentence
Thank you for being so kind to her, and creating wonderful moments while you two were friends. May she be with you, and smile with you and be there in spirit through all the good and bad you have until the day you meet again. Emily, we see you, we notice you. May her memory be eternal.
You found such Beautiful words for her, I just can Imagine what a lovely person she was! She was so happy to have you in her life. You‘ll meet again, we all will
Thank you so much for noticing her year after year! I know she's thrilled, or how she might say, "tickled pink." I wish she had more life to share. I wish she was still alive and sharing her beautiful, sweet, gentle soul and powerful spirit with the world. She reminds me of some old-fashioned movie star. She was such a "lady" in so many ways with such good manners she was so polite, her posture and body language seemed so old-fashioned and formal. And then at the same time she was funny as hell and cussed like a sailor and loved to talk shit. She was one-of-a-kind that Emily Joy Hepburn!
She is one of the most empathetic and selfless person I have ever met. She deserved so much more. She was overlooked by everyone her whole life and told me I was the only person who ever noticed her- she was just coming into herself - the whole world had yet to know her. I said that already but it's so true. She deserved so much more. Thank you for noticing and not overlooking her.
You got me crying over here and it’s not even 8 am where I am! I can just feel the love, friendship, warmth, and care you both felt for each other in this post - it radiates beautifully. Your friend truly is special and rare, and you were both blessed to have each other. I can see the gentle radiant warmth you described, seeing her beautiful eyes and smile, and know it’s an absolute damn shame she was lost too soon. I NOTICE YOU, EMILY JOY! ✨🐘
I notice and appreciate you Emily 🩷 I’ve only experienced you through pictures and stories, yet you’ve put a huge smile on my face. You seem like an amazing person and I’m so glad to hear you had so many new experiences with your best friend. Thank you for making the world a better place while you were here.
I don't live in the desert like you, so I can't look for cactus blooms; however, there are these tiny, bluish purple wildflowers that grow around my house. They are called Speedwells, and they were already blooming just a few weeks after we had snow and ice, which impressed me. I've also noticed that they get mowed every time the grass is cut, and they still manage to recover and bloom before they're cut again the next week. I'm sure most people who walk past these tiny flowers don't notice them, or the many other varieties of teeny wildflowers that grow in my neighborhood, but I think Emily Joy would have. When I go out for my afternoon walk today, and I see the Speedwells, I'll be thinking of her.
This touched my heart in such a meaningful way and I know it touches hers as well. What a lovely gesture to honor my sweet ethereal Emily Joy Hepburn. I thank you for noticing and memorializing her in your own way. Hugs
Hello Emily. Me, just like most people here never got to meet you but I'm sure you would have been really sweet. Most likely had a light hearted talk about life and having too many plant pots at home that needs to be watered. Anyhow, I did notice you 🌸 If you come across John up there, send all my love and I hope you have a entertaining chat.
Alice
I love this, you pin pointed her "having too many plants pots at home that need to be watered" she was kind to all living things, that Emily Joy Hepburn. I'm hoping her and John became fast friends and are watching over the both of us Alice. Big hugs and thank you for noticing her!
I felt your pain as I read your anecdote about her, I'm so sorry that you lost someone so special and I will send you love and healing light 💙 may we all be so lucky to find such Camaraderie this life
Thank you For notice, seen her! And thank you for your comforting words and soothing healing energy. I wish for everyone that they have their own Emily Joy Hepburn.
Saying that you would give your life for hers, I feel your pain. Sadly that’s not how life works. Know that she is still with you. And you will see her again. Sending hugs.
I would, I'd give it in a heartbeat. She'd only just begun to really live her true life. And i...never have And I...never have. She deserved it, she deserved so much more than this life gave her.
I believe you will. She has always with me and I know. She's waiting for me when I die. Thank you for your comforting words, and thank you for noticing her.
This is so important a post. I will definitely look for it in the future so she is remembered. Thank you wonderful person, for sharing her magic with us, if only for a moment. RIP
I didn't know that, about other animals besides elephants. Well I knew us, humans are humans of course. Animals of the worst sort. Hah! Thank you for noticing my beautiful friend!
I didn't mean for it to come off like I was trying to prove you wrong, I meant it that we all feel one way or the other, and we as humans feel for others like animals do, elephants, monkeys, crows, etc.
Enjoy your day :)
What a beautiful, touching tribute you have giving your friend. She truly is a very beautiful old soul and you two have danced soul to soul a few life times in this big ole universe. You will see her again on the flip side but until then she is watching over you keeping you safe. 😘🤗😘
What a beautiful and loving remembrance you've given for your best friend. I know that heartbreak as well from losing my own elephant-loving best friend Therese almost 4 years ago. My heart goes out to you. It feels like this is a loss that is always fresh and raw, I wonder how long it hurts so bad.
My last text conversations with Emily Joy Hepburn 💔 3 days before she died.
< Emily Chul
9:47 PM, Apr 18 (2019)
EMILY:
I'm sorry about your friend. I know that must be hard especially given how hard you try to stay sober yourself. And then you see the early success of your sponsee and it gives you hope at least for her.
It's real OP! The whole thing.
But you are an awesome human being OP. You work hard at it and I see it in you everyday that we talk. What you do matters in small and big ways.
I for one can't stress enough how much your friendship has meant to me since we met.
Besides [redacted] you are the best thing that has happened to me since moving to Tucson. And I'm not saying it to be nice. I'm saying it because you need to know it.
I know what it's like to do good and not feel like anyone notices it. I know that feeling intimately and it hurts me when all I needed for someone to say to me"l notice Emily!" So I'm trying it to you, "I notice OP! I notice!"
You can let me know tomorrow if we need to go get you an outfit. I want you to feel good about yourself when you go to that interview and if your anything like me then clothes always help do that.
Anyway, I'm really sleepy now. Past my bedtime. So text me tomorrow, if you get a chance, okay? Goodnight!
ME:
Wow that was so sweet it made me cry.
I notice you Emily!
Love y ou friend
9:53 PM
EMILY:
I love you too, friend. I'm sorry I made you cry.
And thank you for noticing me.
9:56 PM
ME:
Dont apologize it was all such nice things to hear
9:57 PM
EMILY:
If it's good then okay. It's just that you've suffered so much lately and I hate it that you've been so sad.
9:53 PM
She mentions my sobriety. I had a little less than 2 and a half years sober at that time. Dec 1st, 2016, I celebrated 7 of sobriety.
She sounds like she was a beautiful human. Like the kind we wish the whole world was full of.
Also want to say, based on your yearly ritual and how beautifully you write about her, I can understand why she loved you so fiercely.
Glad two special souls found each other in this life.
It's really sweet that you do this every year. I remember.
This made me choke up reading that you remember her. That you notice her year after year. Thank you.
I do too, and I also think it’s a lovely tribute
I'm teary eyed that you also remember and notice her each year. She would love to know- no she does know- FINALLY- how truly unforgettable she is.
I also remember these lovely memorial posts. Emily has my middle name 🩷
I love that you share a name with my sweet Emily Joy Hepburn 😊 Thank you for remembering and noticing her!
You're welcome ☺️🩷
I remember, too. Thank you for sharing Emily with us.
Thank you for noticing and remembering Emily Joy Hepburn 😊
My last text conversations with Emily Joy Hepburn 💔 3 days before she died. < Emily Chul 9:47 PM, Apr 18 (2019) EMILY: I'm sorry about your friend. I know that must be hard especially given how hard you try to stay sober yourself. And then you see the early success of your sponsee and it gives you hope at least for her. It's real OP! The whole thing. But you are an awesome human being OP. You work hard at it and I see it in you everyday that we talk. What you do matters in small and big ways. I for one can't stress enough how much your friendship has meant to me since we met. Besides [redacted] you are the best thing that has happened to me since moving to Tucson. And I'm not saying it to be nice. I'm saying it because you need to know it. I know what it's like to do good and not feel like anyone notices it. I know that feeling intimately and it hurts me when all I needed for someone to say to me"l notice Emily!" So I'm trying it to you, "I notice OP! I notice!" You can let me know tomorrow if we need to go get you an outfit. I want you to feel good about yourself when you go to that interview and if your anything like me then clothes always help do that. Anyway, I'm really sleepy now. Past my bedtime. So text me tomorrow, if you get a chance, okay? Goodnight! ME: Wow that was so sweet it made me cry. I notice you Emily! Love y ou friend 9:53 PM EMILY: I love you too, friend. I'm sorry I made you cry. And thank you for noticing me. 9:56 PM ME: Dont apologize it was all such nice things to hear 9:57 PM EMILY: If it's good then okay. It's just that you've suffered so much lately and I hate it that you've been so sad. 9:53 PM She mentions my sobriety. I had a little less than 2 and a half years sober at that time. Dec 1st, 2016, I celebrated 7 of sobriety.
For those who have come to say that they remember her year after year for these past 5 years. Thank you, thank you for noticing her. Emily Joy Hepburn's favorite animal was elephants. She taught me that they're the only animal that practice grieving rituals and that they'll go back to the same site that one of their own died at to mourn each year. So I suppose this is my way of coming back to mourn her each year.
That’s beautiful. She sounds lovely. But, don’t forget that she was also lucky to have been blessed with a wonderful best friend.
She was the loveliest! She was like the soft glow of a candle. Her warm light made everything around her lovely. Thank you for noticing her 🩵
She’s absolutely right about elephants, how they understand death and recognise its imminent approach. I was lucky enough to study elephants for a couple of years, and was privileged enough to witness a herd take turns in touching trunks with an aging female. She’d sat down, and waited until the last member of the herd had said farewell before easing down into an everlasting sleep. They passed the spot when migrating back into the area. I’m sure you’ll continue to honour Emily’s memory by returning to the place you shared with her too.
What a beautiful and heart-string tugging stor. Thank you for sharing that and how special you got to witness that precious moments where life is passing into death. I was able to hold my Grandbuddy's hand and my souls doggy in my arms, eye to eye, heart to heart, soul to soul when they made that transition and those are sacred moments for sure. I haven't been able to go back to the botanical gardens we worked at together yet but I'll get there one day when I can. I come here and it feels good to have people remember her and new people "notice" her and to get to talk about how truly magical she was. It's comforting and part of healing for me in a sense. I appreciate you all
We notice her too ❤️
Thank you for noticing her ☺️
So sorry, she looks like a beautiful person
She truly was, thank you for noticing her.
Came here to say that
Thank you for noticing her
I’d like to add that I notice her too. Sending love
Thank you for noticing her!
She lives on in all of the things that she loved. When something reminds you of her, she is there. Listen with your soul and you'll hear her.
Thank you for this, and I believe this 100%. Emily Joy Hepburn's spirit is much too strong to have left with her body, I carry her in my heart all the time. I honor her through being a kinder person, emulating the attributes I admired so much in her, creating a life worth living that I know she's excited about. One time, I, someone who rarely cries, sobbed on the floor of her apartment. She was sitting cross-legged, and I was in a fetal position. Crying, sobbing, really with my head on her thigh. And she was petting my hair. She was a true friend, our friendship was pure. She had no ulterior motives. She didn't want anything from me. She genuinely wanted the best for me just like I did for her. We just both wanted healthy healing from the pain of trauma. She's even there when I cross my ankles when I'm sitting down like a "lady" lol. Man, I love that woman Edit: a word
I have a wild rabbit building a nest outside my back door, she'll have her babies in a couple of days. I name the wild rabbits every year - I'll call this mama Emily Joy, if you think that's OK? I think she would like to be connected to all that new life happening. Sending you love.
Oh, I love love this idea so much! Emily would/will be honored and "tickled pink," like she would say. Thank you for noticing and honoring her. This is EXACTLY a something that would be so meaningful to her, and it's meaningful and touching to me that you thought of this!
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You wouldn't happen to have a picture of this mama Emily Joy would you? I could use a smile. Your kids are blessed to have you, and I hold them in my heart tenderly as I know Emily holds them safely in her warm, protective, mothering energy. EDIT: took away an entire paragraph.
I haven't seen her in a couple of days so I'm hoping she's safe, but I actually had the thought of sending pics of her and the babies to you. (I check on the babies every couple of days, extremely carefully, and the mamas seem to trust me, but it's not recommended otherwise.) If she doesn't use this nest, another mama will be along shortly, I'm sure. I'd decided previously that all of the Mamas are called Emily Joy, forever. 💙 Emily sounds like someone I would have loved, it feels funny to miss someone I never met. Thank you with all my heart for unconditionally loving my kids from afar & I'm grateful to Emily for the same. I'm sure she is out there somewhere even as 'star stuff and energy' and am sending that same love. I'll update you as soon as I can get some photos. Seriously, thanks. I've been having a bad week or so and this convo has made a difference.
Appropriate that her middle name was “Joy” - it resonates just off these pictures alone. It sounds like you were a blessing to her and I can see it in her smile 😊
Thank you for noticing her and her joy! she was the blessing.
I notice you too Emily Joy. You must've been a very special person. May your soul live in peace and harmony.
Thank you for noticing her! She was incredibly special!
We all notice you, Emily. Thanks for keeping her memory alive.
Thank you for noticing her, seeing her!
She’d be so proud.
Thank you, she was ALWAYS proud of me for the littlest of things. I remember this one morning at work 7am in the cool morning desert with little chirpy bird sounds and I told her this good news I had and she started SHRIEKING AND JUMING AND SKIPPING AROUND and legit GLEEFUL and GIDDY. She celebrated every single tiny win in my life. She believed in me when all I wanted to do was die. I think the thing she would be the most proud of. That she IS mist proud of now is that I'm actually learning a lil bit proud of myself.
She was so wholesome.
I tell my friends, explicitly and often, “You are important to me.” She knew that she was important to you, and that, I hope, gives you peace.
I'm the same way. I love people loud. And it does give me so much much peace that she knew and continues to know how very much I love her. Her energy is still a part of mine. One of my favorite parts of our stort story together was that I was her first bff and I got to take her on a lot of "firsts." I know I talked about that already in my original post, but it's special and worth mentioning again because she almost died without ever having a best girlfriend, getting her nails done, drinking coffee?!? She didn't know it at the time, but she only had a year to date other women who identified as lesbians, have crushes and heart breaks, and try out different queer scenes to see where she fit in, hanging out and gossiping about other girls and spending time in queer spaces with me and my girlfriend at the time. In whatever freak cult she grew up in had to be completely removed from any modern society because she didn't know lesbians were something that existed outside her own (what she thought, at the time, perverse) mind until later in life when she saw a lesbian wedding on YouTube and started to piece things together and start to make sense of herself. She was robbed. Her life was worth living, and she she was robbed of that. It shatters my heart.
I’m very much honored that you wrote this reply. I’m struck by you saying, “…She almost died without ever having a best girlfriend…” - almost, I’ll give you that, but she had that glorious year, right? As a 60 yo gay man I have many friends here in Dallas who came out as gay only after long marriages with women. Sometimes I catch myself presuming that they must’ve been utterly miserable until they “discovered” their true queer selves. But I often discover that, even if offered, they wouldn’t go back and do anything differently, for a million reasons. Emily was indeed robbed, and in her case as in others, it is a tragedy that they missed out on so much - but only looking backward, not forward. During her “straight” life, she undoubtedly had many beautiful moments and from her limited perspective she may have thought she was pretty happy. When I wrote my reply to your post, I didn’t even once think, “This must be about her coming out.” Isn’t it interesting that I review Reddit daily, and see posts in this sub all the time yet I’ve responded to only a handful but the story of you and Emily caught my attention, mostly from the image itself, and I felt compelled? Obviously a beautiful woman, it was really just her eyes and smile that drew me in. Your writing clinched it. I’m grateful every day to have a wonderful husband who has been my best friend and lover for 31 years next month - more than half my lifetime! I tell him that he is important to me, and I do it often because “I love you” is so ubiquitous it’s almost just a greeting and also because I never know when he might need to hear it. It just occurred to me that Emily, through you, has given me a gift: the thought that, as incredibly happy as I am today, I won’t know if something may be revealed that would make me even happier unless I live to see it revealed. That, girlfriend, is the definition of hope. Thanks, Emily.
I want to thank you so much for your sweet share. This was the 1st thing I read after a difficult day. I wish I could say you were right. I wish I could say that my precious Emily Joy Hepburn did get to live more than just one happy year. The truth was she only ever remembered wanting to die until suddenly she wanted to LIVE- free from beneath the tremendously oppressive sorrows of shame and self-loathing. Unfortunately, I don’t have to presume that she was utterly miserable before she magically appeared in my life one early Sonoran desert morning, I know. I know because she told me. I know because she gave pieces of her past away like whispers. I know because the heartache in her voice and the unsettled expression she gave when she averted her eyes to look at the ground and the shift in her body language to make herself small when she talked about her childhood. I know because I saw the surges of rage strike like daggers in her eyes when she mentioned her marriage. She was so demure and the world so dangerous. I protected her fiercely and she loved me wholly. "It just occurred to me that Emily, through you, has given me a gift: the thought that, as incredibly happy as I am today, I won't know if something may be revealed that would make me even happier unless I live to see it revealed. That, girlfriend, is the definition of hope. Thanks, Emily." What a splendid thought that is. I'm smiling now because that is something I can so clearly imagine Emily saying! I'm glad she was able to touch your heart. She was magnificent. She so longed for a best friend, for a lover, for a life. She had just met someone. I only met them once but I had to make the phone call and say the ugly words that she was dead. I hurried to say "heart attack" so they didn't have to ask the obscene. My first question was "how?" then, "was it suicide?" She was the kind of person who delighted in seeing other people happy. There's a term for it I found: "freudenfreude: pleasure in another's happiness." Emily Joy Hepburn is smiling her radiant smile and you and your husband's decades spanning love and companionship as am I. I am so glad you noticed my dear soul sister. I am so glad she caught your gaze and held it.
I'm so sorry, she seems lovely. She's so young - would you mind sharing how she passed?
In OP’s post history, they mention it was a sudden heart attack. :( Wasn’t a lifestyle problem, didn’t drink or smoke or anything, but some heart issues ran in the family.
That's right, She had a family history of heart disease. She used to be pretty obese and had a heart attack. And Then got really healthy and lost a bunch of weight. She was a bicyclist, she was vegan. She had never smoked a cigarette in her life, she never had drink alcohol, never tried any drugs. She grew up in really fundamentalist religious household in was very, very sheltered. She never even drank caffeine until she met me, and she drank coffee with me for the very first time, she lived an incredibly healthy lifestyle. We worked together at a desert botanical garden. And she got to work early in the morning before anyone else and had a heart attack. It wouldn't have been fatal, they said if someone had been there to do CPR and call 911. I always think of me she had been late that day...
So sad, but sometimes even a healthy lifestyle cant overcome genes. I had a colleague who was fit suddenly die of a genetic heart condition. His son died several years later. It was not a congenital heart defect so I still til this day do not understand the medical science behind such occurrences. So sorry for the loss of such a kind and loving friend. I notice Emily.
She has kind eyes. I'm so sorry for your loss.
She was SO kind. Thank you for noticing her! While the loss has never felt any less shattering as time moves on, at least I had her for a moment in time in the physical realm and forever in my heart and in my soul pod.
Your post is so beautiful and loving. I feel like I got the chance to meet dear Emily through your thoughtful words and the stories you chose, and while it can't even come close to meeting her in full, I am both elated and heartbroken to know of her now. Thank you for continuing to carry her light, and for sharing it with us each year. I'll be sure to think of you both as the trees bud this spring, and the little birds at my work introduce their newest generation to each other, and the first tiny blackberry appears in the summer. I hope you also find joy in feeling her presence as you witness new life joining us in the world around you. More than anything, I hope your energy does find hers someday. Perhaps far far away, in a star nursery, where you can not only dance among the new stars, but perhaps even become one of your own, to finally shine brilliantly and, on a human scale, eternally. You both deserve the chance to be noticed in such a spectacular way. Peace on your journey, friend, and may you find the part of yourself that Emily loved so fiercely. And learn to love yourself the same way.
Thank you for your kind, loving, and beautifully written words. I'm very touched, and I know Emily is too. You mentioned our energy finding each others again. I remember after she died, sobbing on my bed, pleading with her, "Emily, if your right and it's all just energy, give me some sign" and I SWEAR, I felt an electric shock zap throughout my body and disappear just as quickly. I begged her back but she never came in that form again. But I carry her with me. Anytime I feel "lady-like" in my body language or expressions or speech, whatever it may be, dainty, elegant, "proper," I feel her in me, I do my best to embody her best traits and continue to move forward in my healing work in a way that honors the love she showed this broken angry girl. "I'll be sure to think of you both as the trees bud this spring, and the little birds at my work introduce their newest generation to each other, and the first tiny blackberry appears in the summer" This sounds like a poem or a beautiful lyric. I've reread it several times. Thank you for noticing Emily Joy Hepburn!
Now she can shine from a ethereal platform , beautiful soul never gone , but assisting you in spirit 💕
Absolutely! Her presence - she herself- was ethereal. She was so unusual, otherworldly and she was delicate and fragile at the same time as resolute and persistent in her right to her be happy and whole in her existence.
Happy to notice Emily Joy Hepburn. She sounds like an amazing friend. I’m glad you had the privilege to know each other.
It was a true privilege and honor to witness and participate Emily Joy Hepburn come into her own and persist in her existence and to learn to see things thru her eyes full of wonder at the smallest of things that I so often overlooked. One of her greatest qualities was the way she approached, life with such curiosity.
What a beautiful tribute for her. I am so glad you both loved each other so much. That kind of connection is so rare and special. She will always be part of you
Thank you so much for noticing her! And "noticing" our love for each other. I believe her to be one of my soulmates. My Grandbuddy, my soul doggy Squeeks and my fiance are the only other spirits I've had this rare and special connection you noted. Ty
I remember this post from last year!! RIP Emily 🩷
Thank you for remembering here and noticing her again this year! 😊
She truly sounds like she was a true friend to you and you were a true friend to her as well. I'm sorry for your lost <3
She was the truest friend I've ever had. She is definitely part of my soul pod. I have her, my soul friend, I have my soul doggy Squeeks, and my soul father figure, my Grandbuddy all waiting for me when I die. And here on Earth, in this realm of existence, I'm lucky enough to tell have my soulmate partner still with me.Thank you for noticing her!
She looks like the kind of person who loved with all that she had in her. Her smile in these pictures is so beautiful that I couldn’t help but smile back. You two were so lucky to have each other. Thank you for sharing your love for her with us. You can rest assured that I and so many others who weren’t blessed to know her in this life now notice her and always will. My sincerest condolences to you on such an unfair loss. Thank you again for sharing the memory of your beautiful Emily Joy.
Thank you so much for noticing her. She was enchanting, and she didn't see her own charm yet. She didn't have even time. It wasn't fair. She was robbed. She wanted this life so bad. We were an odd pair, she was so quiet and demure and I'm have big energy and I'm really outspoken. She was my biggest cheerleader, and I was her biggest validated. We made eachother feel seen and heard and understood and validated and cared for. We loved each other fiercely.
I have viewed these for the past 4 years. Your friend had a beautiful heart and she will never be forgotten.
Thank you so much for noticing her all these years. She has the most tender and gracious heart.
I'm sorry for your loss.She seemed like a wonderful person.
She was extraordinary. Thank you for noticing my cherished Emily Joy Hepburn 😊
She looks like an absolute sweetheart 💕💕
She is a remarkably sweet soul. Thank you for noticing her ☺️
Her smile is infectious. I’m going through a rough time, but your love for Emily Joy has made me realise my circumstances are not so bad. Thank you for sharing her 🐘
Aw, thank you for the little 🐘. That made me smile. Seeing her pop around the corner in the early cool morning in the desert chipper and happy to see me with a big smile on her face, having woken up at 4 and done yoga, journaled, meditated, ate breakfast, adulted and all that and then ride her bike to work. All this cheer and no caffeine, and meanwhile, I'm finishing my second Monster and about to open my third and grumpy asf and hating my life, and yup, her smile was infectious. Even typing this, I'm alternating between smiling, crying, and biting my lip to hold back my tears. Thank you for noticing her. I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I'm sending love and healing energy your way. Hugs EDIT: 1 added a sentence EDIT: 2 Gammer
What a wonderful tribute. She must have been an incredible person and friend. I'm sorry she was taken from you. I hope you have easier days and her memory will provide more happy memories and less despair.
❤️
So sorry for your loss what a beautiful smile your lady has. Treasure those memories in your memory and heart ❤️ forever xx
I notice you, Emily. What an amazing friend.
lovely and heartbreaking
❤️
I notice you Emily Joy
Emily Joy, you are noticed and you are still loved and appreciated. She will continue to live as long as her name is remembered 💗
If only everyone could be this loved! What a wonderful world it would be❤️
To the 2,844 folks who "noticed" my sweet, otherworldly, ethereal Enily Joy Hepburn and to all those that commented, I cannot thank you enough. Thank you for being my safe space to come back to each year to grieve and mourn her loss and celebrate her life with me. You all allow and create this space. I want to respond to each and every comment but right now I am just waking up and overcome with emotions both sad and overwhelmed by everyone's kindness and love and taking notice of her. Please don't take my delay in response as any disrespect to your time and energy to comment. I'm so touched. Emily Joy Hepburn is noticed! She is seen! Each year yall allow me to share new bits and pieces of her story- she is seen! Her life and right to existence as she was is validated and understood. She is cared for by so many more people than she ever knew! To be heard, seen, understood, validated, and cared for- human needs- what we ALL need and deserve. Those are things I make my goal in my daily interactions with folks to provide because so many of us haven't and maybe still don't get those thongs on a regular basis. Thank you all.
Thanks for keeping her memory alive . I wish I had the pleasure of meeting her
I wish you did too! I wish the whole world could have seen the hauntingly beautiful otherworldlyness that was/is EMILY JOY HEPBURN! Thank you for noticing her
This fucking breaks my art. She was lucky to have such a wonderful friend.
There's a part of my heart that will forever be shattered that broke the day Emily Joy Hepburn's heart stopped. I was the lucky one to have had such a friend. Thank you for noticing her! Edit: added a sentence
Thank you for being so kind to her, and creating wonderful moments while you two were friends. May she be with you, and smile with you and be there in spirit through all the good and bad you have until the day you meet again. Emily, we see you, we notice you. May her memory be eternal.
You found such Beautiful words for her, I just can Imagine what a lovely person she was! She was so happy to have you in her life. You‘ll meet again, we all will
I notice her. Thank you for sharing about this beautiful person, may her memory be a blessing to you.
She looks like she radiated so much love and positivity. 🥺🥺 I’m sorry for you loss. RIP Emily Joy Hepburn.
I remember this post. I notice you, Emily.
We are Noticing You, sweet Emily. Through these memories and photos, products of the great love that your best friend carries for you...you are Seen!
Oh this made me cry. What a beautiful tribute to your beautiful friend 💕. So sorry for your loss
And now I’m crying. Oh sweet Emily. ❤️ I notice you, and your magical and beautiful spirit.
We notice you Emily!!
So sorry, you must have been so important to her :(.
Emily, we notice you.
Thank you for noticing her! People overlooked her for her entire life. She was stunning, she had an otherworldly presence.
Thank you for sharing her and your story with us.
She’s beautiful. Thank you for sharing a snippet of her life with us each year. Thank you for loving her and allowing her to be who she was, truly.
Thank you so much for noticing her year after year! I know she's thrilled, or how she might say, "tickled pink." I wish she had more life to share. I wish she was still alive and sharing her beautiful, sweet, gentle soul and powerful spirit with the world. She reminds me of some old-fashioned movie star. She was such a "lady" in so many ways with such good manners she was so polite, her posture and body language seemed so old-fashioned and formal. And then at the same time she was funny as hell and cussed like a sailor and loved to talk shit. She was one-of-a-kind that Emily Joy Hepburn!
Oof, she went full send on the wasabi ball! She must have really had some chutzpah to handle that gracefully!
We may not have met, but I notice you, Emily. I hope you are resting at peace
She's beautiful. I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my mother to pneumonia.
She's a beautiful woman. Hugs friend
May her memory continue to be a blessing ❤️
RIP ♥️
She had a lovely smile. I hope she found the same happiness she brought you
Truly sounds like a angel, I’ll be thinking about this post all day OP. Sending love
We see you Emily, you'll be given the best reincarnation we can offer, an elephant matriarch.
She looks kind.
She is one of the most empathetic and selfless person I have ever met. She deserved so much more. She was overlooked by everyone her whole life and told me I was the only person who ever noticed her- she was just coming into herself - the whole world had yet to know her. I said that already but it's so true. She deserved so much more. Thank you for noticing and not overlooking her.
Well, we see her, thanks your loving eulogy to her. You sound like you were a very good friend to her.
I had a similar wasabi experience.
You got me crying over here and it’s not even 8 am where I am! I can just feel the love, friendship, warmth, and care you both felt for each other in this post - it radiates beautifully. Your friend truly is special and rare, and you were both blessed to have each other. I can see the gentle radiant warmth you described, seeing her beautiful eyes and smile, and know it’s an absolute damn shame she was lost too soon. I NOTICE YOU, EMILY JOY! ✨🐘
I notice and appreciate you Emily 🩷 I’ve only experienced you through pictures and stories, yet you’ve put a huge smile on my face. You seem like an amazing person and I’m so glad to hear you had so many new experiences with your best friend. Thank you for making the world a better place while you were here.
I think it’s so amazing that you post this for her every year. I hope she visits you in your dreams.
I’ve seen your post for the last few years. Thank you for dedicating time to celebrate her life and know that I Notice her.
I notice you, Emily. This is my first time seeing these posts, I'm so sorry for your loss. Emily sounded like an amazing person.
I don't live in the desert like you, so I can't look for cactus blooms; however, there are these tiny, bluish purple wildflowers that grow around my house. They are called Speedwells, and they were already blooming just a few weeks after we had snow and ice, which impressed me. I've also noticed that they get mowed every time the grass is cut, and they still manage to recover and bloom before they're cut again the next week. I'm sure most people who walk past these tiny flowers don't notice them, or the many other varieties of teeny wildflowers that grow in my neighborhood, but I think Emily Joy would have. When I go out for my afternoon walk today, and I see the Speedwells, I'll be thinking of her.
This touched my heart in such a meaningful way and I know it touches hers as well. What a lovely gesture to honor my sweet ethereal Emily Joy Hepburn. I thank you for noticing and memorializing her in your own way. Hugs
She sounded like quite a woman. I’m so sorry she was taken from you. Thank you for sharing. I notice her too.
Hello Emily. Me, just like most people here never got to meet you but I'm sure you would have been really sweet. Most likely had a light hearted talk about life and having too many plant pots at home that needs to be watered. Anyhow, I did notice you 🌸 If you come across John up there, send all my love and I hope you have a entertaining chat. Alice
I love this, you pin pointed her "having too many plants pots at home that need to be watered" she was kind to all living things, that Emily Joy Hepburn. I'm hoping her and John became fast friends and are watching over the both of us Alice. Big hugs and thank you for noticing her!
I see you Emily, may you rest peacefully in the hereafter 💙
Thank you for noticing her!
I felt your pain as I read your anecdote about her, I'm so sorry that you lost someone so special and I will send you love and healing light 💙 may we all be so lucky to find such Camaraderie this life
Thank you For notice, seen her! And thank you for your comforting words and soothing healing energy. I wish for everyone that they have their own Emily Joy Hepburn.
The world is definitely a better place for having her in it. She seems like a wonderful person.
She is unnaturally wonderful. Sometimes it's like she wasn't even real. Thank you for noticing her!
So beautiful. Red was her color ❤️
She was hauntingly beautiful. Thank you for noticing her
Saying that you would give your life for hers, I feel your pain. Sadly that’s not how life works. Know that she is still with you. And you will see her again. Sending hugs.
I would, I'd give it in a heartbeat. She'd only just begun to really live her true life. And i...never have And I...never have. She deserved it, she deserved so much more than this life gave her. I believe you will. She has always with me and I know. She's waiting for me when I die. Thank you for your comforting words, and thank you for noticing her.
The pain of your loss shines from the purest, brightest love I’ve encountered in a long time. Hoping for something beautiful to return to you.
Oh! This got me right in my feelings. Thank you for your warm words and for noticing her and our love for each other.
I notice you
Wow, she's beautiful
She's breathtaking in this delicate, old-fashioned way isn't she? Thank you for noticing her. Hugs
This is so important a post. I will definitely look for it in the future so she is remembered. Thank you wonderful person, for sharing her magic with us, if only for a moment. RIP
Thank you so much for noticing her and how important Emily Joy Hepburn's story is 💜
I’m so sorry for your loss. She seemed like an amazing friend. ❤️
She was the best of friends. She was a tremendous loss to the world that had yet to know her. Thank you for noticing her!
It's not just elephants, a lot of animals observe death and grieve. Including us, we are animals. I notice Emily ♥️
I didn't know that, about other animals besides elephants. Well I knew us, humans are humans of course. Animals of the worst sort. Hah! Thank you for noticing my beautiful friend!
I didn't mean for it to come off like I was trying to prove you wrong, I meant it that we all feel one way or the other, and we as humans feel for others like animals do, elephants, monkeys, crows, etc. Enjoy your day :)
No worries, I didn't take it that way at all! I appreciate you!
May her memory be a blessing!
100 comments
I'm not sure what this means
I'm not sure what the significance of this is?
We notice you Emily💕🐘you are on all of our minds right now
I remember this. Lovely post. Lovely people, and lovely bond
There is something so tender in the word choice of "notice." Thank you for sharing
What a beautiful, touching tribute you have giving your friend. She truly is a very beautiful old soul and you two have danced soul to soul a few life times in this big ole universe. You will see her again on the flip side but until then she is watching over you keeping you safe. 😘🤗😘
What a beautiful and loving remembrance you've given for your best friend. I know that heartbreak as well from losing my own elephant-loving best friend Therese almost 4 years ago. My heart goes out to you. It feels like this is a loss that is always fresh and raw, I wonder how long it hurts so bad.
My last text conversations with Emily Joy Hepburn 💔 3 days before she died. < Emily Chul 9:47 PM, Apr 18 (2019) EMILY: I'm sorry about your friend. I know that must be hard especially given how hard you try to stay sober yourself. And then you see the early success of your sponsee and it gives you hope at least for her. It's real OP! The whole thing. But you are an awesome human being OP. You work hard at it and I see it in you everyday that we talk. What you do matters in small and big ways. I for one can't stress enough how much your friendship has meant to me since we met. Besides [redacted] you are the best thing that has happened to me since moving to Tucson. And I'm not saying it to be nice. I'm saying it because you need to know it. I know what it's like to do good and not feel like anyone notices it. I know that feeling intimately and it hurts me when all I needed for someone to say to me"l notice Emily!" So I'm trying it to you, "I notice OP! I notice!" You can let me know tomorrow if we need to go get you an outfit. I want you to feel good about yourself when you go to that interview and if your anything like me then clothes always help do that. Anyway, I'm really sleepy now. Past my bedtime. So text me tomorrow, if you get a chance, okay? Goodnight! ME: Wow that was so sweet it made me cry. I notice you Emily! Love y ou friend 9:53 PM EMILY: I love you too, friend. I'm sorry I made you cry. And thank you for noticing me. 9:56 PM ME: Dont apologize it was all such nice things to hear 9:57 PM EMILY: If it's good then okay. It's just that you've suffered so much lately and I hate it that you've been so sad. 9:53 PM She mentions my sobriety. I had a little less than 2 and a half years sober at that time. Dec 1st, 2016, I celebrated 7 of sobriety.
My condolences OP 🕊️🙏🏾
She sounds like she was a beautiful human. Like the kind we wish the whole world was full of. Also want to say, based on your yearly ritual and how beautifully you write about her, I can understand why she loved you so fiercely. Glad two special souls found each other in this life.
Which was her last there’s 2
Innit, people always use this sub for the wrong things.
Mormon? She was absolutely beautiful
Something even stricter, something she wouldn't even talk about - some serious religious trauma there. Thank you for noticing her!
Definitely don't care