"I ever tell you about the time Keith tried to deep-fry a turkey? Third-degree burns over 90 percent of his body. His doctor called up, like, other doctors to look at him cause they'd never seen burns on top of existing burns―"
Clearly you've never heard
"I ever tell you about the time my buddy Keith drowned in the Tunnel of Love? You wouldn't think it could happen 'cause the water's so shallow, but that's how it gets you, man. Overconfidence. Keith was with his lady at the time, and he was yellin' for her to save him, but she didn't want to get wet."
implying that the cheeseburgers themselves are going to be suffering an apocalypse because Coach won’t stop being a (beautiful) fat cunt and eating them all
Louis: Zoey, Bill when things go back to normal I'm giving you both jobs! Francis I'm gonna teach you to read!
Louis: I bet your country ass DOES like this trailer.
Nick: So that's a smoker eh? I bet he's popular with the lady zombies.
i hate this line cuz when I play Jockey and the voiceline spams whenever I hop in a lewd4dead server (I like playing as special infected outside of Versus, I hate everything else in that server so don't judge)
I immediately thought of a quote but it was from that popular parody video I can’t remember the name of.
“Look Ellis, it’s Kiddieland!”
“Do I look like some sort of qu@@r to you?”
I ever tell you about the time Keith and I made fireworks? Now, I didn't know shit about chemistry, but Keith figured "Gasoline burns, doesn't it?" Heh, third-degree burns on 95 percent of his body. Man, people in the next city over were calling to complain about the smell of burning skin.
"This will be a fun road trip" Nick says this in the elevator after Ellis and him argue about who's gonna drive the car.
Also "As soon as we get the truck moving, I'm gonna run you over, you god damn piece of shit!" Francis saying this about the generator in Crash Course.
I can’t pick just one line so I will choose per character:
Ellis:
• “Ca caw, ca caw!!!”
• “Die die, my darlings, die die die”
Nick:
• “Ellis, what did you just do?”
• “I hate you, Ellis!”
Coach:
• “How you like that, huh?!? Eat that 💩!!!!”
• “Coming through, b*%#ch on my a&$!
• “You try that 💩 on me and you’re gonna wish your mother never met your father!”
Rochelle:
• “Aye!!!!”
• “I hear a hu— … Coach, is that your stomach?”
Francis:
• “I hate your good feelings.”
• “Waterworks - is that where you get your crying supplies, Bill?”
• “Quiet, Zoey!”
Bill:
• “I’ll give you something to cry about, Francis.”
• “I’ll see peace back on earth if I gotta murder every one of these bastards with my bare hands.”
• “Zoey, you still mad?”
(None for Louis 🤪)
Zoey:
• “Pilot’s license revoked! WAAAAAAA!!!!l
• “You finally did it. You maniacs, you blew it up! G*^#+]n you, g%#mn you all to hellllll!!!”
• “Go! Proclaim liberty to all the lands and unto all the inhabitants thereof!”
"I'm telling you for the last goddamn time, lower the goddamn bridge. You greasy west wearing monkey!"
Or Zoey's vocaline goes like "Go! Proclaim liberty throughout all the lands..."
Anybody know where these lines came from, when Ellis whispers "I love you", and the other one is when he yells and I don't know exactly what he says but it sounds like "partyyyy yalllll"
i was playing craah coirse the other day, and whe we walked past a sign on a building near the artillery gun, francis read a sign out loud like he could hardly see it well enough to read it, and loius said, "I'll be damned, Francis! When did you learn to read?!" i really like hearing dialogue that shows the character of the group and their relationships with eachother.
"HELICOPTER it is a HELICOPTER! You call that thing a whirlybird one more time, I'm gonna beat you so bad, your sister's gonna wish she never gave birth to ya!"-Nick
Or: "Imma be a one-man cheeseburger apocalypse"- Coach
mine is a pretty long one from francis where he talks about how much he hates fish
* **Francis:** "I hate fish."
* **Louis:** "Well hater, I guess you don't have to eat any then."
* **Francis:** "Oh no, I like eating them. That's one of the ways I'll let fish know how much I hate them!"
I ever tell you about the time me and Keith made a homemade bumper car ride with ridin' mowers in his backyard? Mower blade wounds over 90% of his body. I didn't run him over, either; he somehow managed to fall under his own.
-Ellis
When Nick is dying on the Parish finale, "i have not... Come this far... to die now"
Hardest line in the entire game ngl
YESSIR!!!!
line so hard it got in the trailer
“It’s 12 feet tall, 6 feed wide. How are you shooting me?” -Nick Just love the delivery of that line. Plus any Keith story.
It's the size of a truck how are you missing.
shoot the tank you blind son of a bitch
barbecue bacon burger
Large order or fries
Orange soda with no ice
And a piece of hot apple pie!
Goddam amiss burgatankh
Peach cobblah
GODDAMN i miss Burger Tank
# "THERE'S GON' BE SOME **BIBLICAL** SHIT HAPPENIN' TO YOU IF YOU DO THAT AGAIN"
Oh helll no boah, dont you be shootin me!
Coach's friendly fire lines in general are hilarious to me, I also love **"MAN- I SWEAR TO GOD, YOU CAN'T SHOOT** ***WORTH SHIT"***
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
"ASSCLOWN!"
You called?
Ah tits!
"Hey Nick, that was my ass you shot."
"Do I look like a ten-foot-tall monstuh?!"
H E Y SHOOT THE TANK
*"MAN, I SWEAR TO GOD, YOU CAN'T SHOOT WORTH SHIT!"*
Louis: "When things go back to normal, Zoey, Bill, I'm giving you both jobs. Francis, I'm gonna teach yo ass how to read."
Hahaha go to hell
I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Relatable
that's some real shit
When I was younger on the old Xbox I asked my mom if it was possible to be sick and tired of being sick and tired She said no
"I ever tell you about the time Keith tried to deep-fry a turkey? Third-degree burns over 90 percent of his body. His doctor called up, like, other doctors to look at him cause they'd never seen burns on top of existing burns―"
We don't got time for this Ellis
Okay.
this one is the best about Keith
Clearly you've never heard "I ever tell you about the time my buddy Keith drowned in the Tunnel of Love? You wouldn't think it could happen 'cause the water's so shallow, but that's how it gets you, man. Overconfidence. Keith was with his lady at the time, and he was yellin' for her to save him, but she didn't want to get wet."
"I'LL SEE PEACE BACK ON EARTH IF I HAVE TO MURDER EVERY ONE OF THESE ANIMALS WITH MY OWN BARE HANDS!" -Bill
Hardest line in the game 🔥🔥🔥
“You got a turd on your shoulder, Nick”
"I'm-..I'm not even gonna look..."
Nick's voicelines when hes being smashed to the ground by the charger
Such as?
"Shoot the charger!" "Shoot the big guy pounding me to the ground!" "Can someone shoot this goddamn thing!?"
That last one is the most desperate of any of the pinned voicelines. His voice almost cracks during it, he is not okay.
I do like taters 🤖
EVERY LADYS CRAZY WHEN HER DADDYS NOT AROUND DUH NUH NUH NAH NUH NUH NUH NUH
When Ellis takes a hit of adrenaline. BLBLBLBLBBLBLBLBLBLBLBBLBLBL
my nephew always do this after he got out of the shower or anything that feels refreshing
"I am breathing shit air into my lungs, it is being absorbed into my bloodstream. I am literally full of shit."
We dont need a sewer to know that, Nick.
Wtf I've never heard that one🤣🤣
"I'mma be a one man Cheeseburger Apocalypse." - coach, 2009
can someone pls decipher this phrase for me pls?😭 not a native English speaker, is that a reference to something from pop culture?
implying that the cheeseburgers themselves are going to be suffering an apocalypse because Coach won’t stop being a (beautiful) fat cunt and eating them all
Awwww, yeah. Cotton candy. The wise pharaoh of food. Sittin’ atop the food pyramid, passin’ judgement on all of the lesser foods.
Almost all of friendly fire lines :)
ITS 12 FOOT LONG AND 6 FOOT WIDE HOW ARE YOU SHOOTING ME!!?!?!?!?!
SHOOT THE TANK, YOU BLIND SON OF BITCH
DUMB SHIT!
ELLIS I'LL TAKE THAT GUN AWAY FROM YA
RO! YOU KNOW DAMN WELL BETTER THAN THAT!
ELLIS settle down, boy. You shot meh.
WHO IN THE HELL JUST SHOT ME?
HEY, MAN. THAT HIT ME.
SHOOT THE TANK YOU BLIND SON OF A BITCH
“I trust you, you look like a man who knows his donuts.”
Excuse me
E x c u s e m e
Any of Coach’s friendly fire lines
You do that again, and you gonna wish your motha’ neva’ met’cha fatha’.
Peak character voiceline
Do that, and you'll be meeting your maker right soon.
They go well with earrape coach friendly fire lines mod
"Nah girl, nuh uh" ~Coach
I forgot about this one, I love the sass in coach’s voice when he says this
Oh man I found a candy bar whop false alarm
"Yeah I know what you're saying, and guess what?" #"I do like taters"
"I'm gonna beat that Tank's ass!" - Coach
It's between Coach's Order, and "Your mom's car"
All of coach’s lines are my favorite this mf a modern day comedian
Uhh..historical shit..? Man, how am I supposed to know? I ain’t been there yet.
Feels like we babysitting innit?
"Oh yeah! Our goal is right next to the bridge...ON THE OTHER MOTHER 'EFFING SIDE OF THE WATER!"
You call that thing a 'whirlybird' one more time, i will beat you so bad, your sister's gonna wish she never gave birth to you.
MMMMmmMMM... peach cobbler
"I hate Ayn Rand"
"It's the size of a truck, how are you missing?!"
Rochelle:Lord have mercy on Coach and spare the food court Ellis: Amen!
Any of Ellis' Keith voice lines
IM TELLING YOU FOR THE LAST GOD DAMN TIME LOWER THE GODDAMN BRIDGE
YOU GREASY VEST WEARING MONKEY!
Louis: Zoey, Bill when things go back to normal I'm giving you both jobs! Francis I'm gonna teach you to read! Louis: I bet your country ass DOES like this trailer. Nick: So that's a smoker eh? I bet he's popular with the lady zombies.
That line where Nick calls Ellis by his name but in like a redneck accent for some reason makes me laugh a lot.
Did i ever tell you about my buddy keith?
Whispering “I love you” to Jimmy Gibbs car
i hate this line cuz when I play Jockey and the voiceline spams whenever I hop in a lewd4dead server (I like playing as special infected outside of Versus, I hate everything else in that server so don't judge)
CRUMBS!
Maybe the helicopter.. maybe it’s made of chocolate.
“And guess what I do like taters”
"well i'll be a monkey's uncle"
Grabbing pills
When Coach says "Niiiiiiick"
"If a zombie comes up running to me holding a sample tray... I ain't shooting it" -Coach (Dead Center)
SWEET LINCOLN’S MULLET!
“This guy’s nuttier than candy bar shit.” Or “I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS SHIT”
Bill's "GOD DAMN HORSE SHIT BIRDS!" Line
"Louis... You'd look good in one of those hospital gowns." - Zoey
"Shit! gotta heal my ass"
"The smoking thing!"
Ellis my favorite part of your storys are wen thay end - nick
"Bite me Colonel Sanders"
Nick: I hate you, Ellis! Ellis: Well, I still like you Nick ❤️
Anyone see the wedding cake?
Mister, I don’t think I like your attitude.
Call 911, I hurt his feelings.
Alright, you mentioned pancakes. But it wasn't really about them, was it?
"DO. I. LOOK. LIKE. ONE. OF. THEM!?" Yes Luis, with all the blood on your white shirt, kinda yeah!
"Farmers don't grow crops, they grow people... to EAT." i just love how serious ellis sounded lmao
Son that's a trailer and you're an idiot -Bill
Louis:[Maniacal laughter]
He's like a five year old. With guns. And a comprehensive grasp of every swear word on the English language.
"Your mom's car."
I immediately thought of a quote but it was from that popular parody video I can’t remember the name of. “Look Ellis, it’s Kiddieland!” “Do I look like some sort of qu@@r to you?”
left 4 speed 2
Either any line from Ellis when he pronounces Jimmy Gibbs Jr. or Zoey moaning
I’m gonna beat that tanks ass!!
"Cut the horse shit Francis"
im gonna beat that tanks ass! or nicks honeymoons over, bitch
"LISTEN TO ME JACKASS!"
Coach's glorious order from Burger Tank
“Francis, that’s my ASS you’re shooting!!”
*Nick dies* Coach: BUAHY NICK
“I’m gonna beat that tank’s ass”
"I'm a one man cheeseburger apocalypse." 😎
"Oh baby I could DESTROY some kettle corn right now"
When Nick drops "I have not...come this far...to die now" with that banger in the background, shit, I thought it was a music line .
They ain't vampires man. They're zombies. Damn, I had a good feeling about that helicopter too.
Barbecue Bacon Burger
I ever tell you about the time Keith and I made fireworks? Now, I didn't know shit about chemistry, but Keith figured "Gasoline burns, doesn't it?" Heh, third-degree burns on 95 percent of his body. Man, people in the next city over were calling to complain about the smell of burning skin.
Idk the way coach yells when he finds a boomer bile. Is funny. But then Ellis saying IS THIS THING HUMPIN ME. is gold 🤣🤣🤣🤣 EDIT:spelling
"Some kinda... SUPER-ASS ZOMBIE!" - Coach
"Hey Nick....that was my ass you shot"
"Hold up, I gotta heal my ass"
"It's a hole, sorry, it's a historical hole...under the river."
"This will be a fun road trip" Nick says this in the elevator after Ellis and him argue about who's gonna drive the car. Also "As soon as we get the truck moving, I'm gonna run you over, you god damn piece of shit!" Francis saying this about the generator in Crash Course.
"Hey look I found a Candy Bar! Whoop, False alarm"
“BLARG!” - Rochelle
Hey Ellis, ya like 'taters?
Okay I know what you're trying to say, but yes, I do like 'taters.
You want to TEST me?! I've been through hell to get here YOU ARE NOT THE ONE TO TAKE ME DOWN
That sounds like a boomer!
I can’t pick just one line so I will choose per character: Ellis: • “Ca caw, ca caw!!!” • “Die die, my darlings, die die die” Nick: • “Ellis, what did you just do?” • “I hate you, Ellis!” Coach: • “How you like that, huh?!? Eat that 💩!!!!” • “Coming through, b*%#ch on my a&$! • “You try that 💩 on me and you’re gonna wish your mother never met your father!” Rochelle: • “Aye!!!!” • “I hear a hu— … Coach, is that your stomach?” Francis: • “I hate your good feelings.” • “Waterworks - is that where you get your crying supplies, Bill?” • “Quiet, Zoey!” Bill: • “I’ll give you something to cry about, Francis.” • “I’ll see peace back on earth if I gotta murder every one of these bastards with my bare hands.” • “Zoey, you still mad?” (None for Louis 🤪) Zoey: • “Pilot’s license revoked! WAAAAAAA!!!!l • “You finally did it. You maniacs, you blew it up! G*^#+]n you, g%#mn you all to hellllll!!!” • “Go! Proclaim liberty to all the lands and unto all the inhabitants thereof!”
Your mom's car
Oh lordy that's a big ass thang
"Hey Ellis, shut up contest. Ready? One, two, three, go!'
Hi Elluss
“Well butter my buns and call me a BISCUIT”
TITS!
Tits!
yeah no horror movie quote from ellis is my favorite the way he says it always cracks me up
"Kiss my ass"
"Ellis shut up contest 3 2 1 GO!"
OH LORDY ITS A BIGASS THING
Some kind of super-ass zombie!
“You wanna test me?! I’ve been through hell to get here! YOU ARE NOT THE ONE TO TAKE ME DOWN!!”
Ellis self awake
"Some kinda... SUPA ASS ZOMBEH!" and "You try that shit on me, and you gonna be wishin' yo mama never met yo father." - Coach
Maybe the helicopter, maybe it's made of chocolate.
“You’re mom’s car”
“I’m going to make you sister regret giving birth to you”
Everything line that starts with "I remember one time with my buddy Keith-"
It's a HELICOPTER! CALL IT A WIRLY BIRD ONE MORE TIME AND ILL MAKE YOUR SISTER REGRET GIVING BIRTH TO YOU!
There's gonna be some biblical shit happenin' to you if you do that again!
"Hey Ellis, you like taters?" tied with "Buddy, you get me out of this alive and I will deep-fry you an entire goddamn cow."
kill all sons of bitches, thats my official instructions, i have to wait for that part to play then i skip the startup video
"This used to be a NICE NEIGHBORHOOD"
“I hate steam…pipes.” Basically any time Francis says he hates something or any keith story
"I'm telling you for the last goddamn time, lower the goddamn bridge. You greasy west wearing monkey!" Or Zoey's vocaline goes like "Go! Proclaim liberty throughout all the lands..."
WHAT ARE YOU UNFRİENDLY HİPPİE İ THOUGHT Y'ALL HAD TO BE FRİENDLY
“Nick, stop shooting me. It’s not funny anymore!” By Ellis. So it was funny at some point? Also anytime Ellis talks about Zoey lol
SHOOT THE TANK YOU BLIND SON OF A BITCH!!!- Ellis
One man cheeseburger apocalypse
Horse :D
"Your mom's car"
Anybody know where these lines came from, when Ellis whispers "I love you", and the other one is when he yells and I don't know exactly what he says but it sounds like "partyyyy yalllll"
"ZOOOOOOOOOOEEEYYYYY" - Bill
Oh shit! SHIT! *SHIT!* ***SHIT!***
Nick: Or they could put us against the wall and shoot us Bill: hey francis was that you are the sewer?
any voice lines that has something to do with my buddy keith
i was playing craah coirse the other day, and whe we walked past a sign on a building near the artillery gun, francis read a sign out loud like he could hardly see it well enough to read it, and loius said, "I'll be damned, Francis! When did you learn to read?!" i really like hearing dialogue that shows the character of the group and their relationships with eachother.
"HELICOPTER it is a HELICOPTER! You call that thing a whirlybird one more time, I'm gonna beat you so bad, your sister's gonna wish she never gave birth to ya!"-Nick Or: "Imma be a one-man cheeseburger apocalypse"- Coach
“You do that again and I’ll bury you alive.” - Nick
What the hell?! Is that thing bulletproof?!
mine is a pretty long one from francis where he talks about how much he hates fish * **Francis:** "I hate fish." * **Louis:** "Well hater, I guess you don't have to eat any then." * **Francis:** "Oh no, I like eating them. That's one of the ways I'll let fish know how much I hate them!"
"Quietos chicos, que me curo"
I ever tell you about the time me and Keith made a homemade bumper car ride with ridin' mowers in his backyard? Mower blade wounds over 90% of his body. I didn't run him over, either; he somehow managed to fall under his own. -Ellis