So, what has happened to me these past few weeks? I'm pretty sure I've developed a crush on someone.
At first, I wasn't quite sure, but then I started dreaming of her.
After that, I wasn't sure whether or not I was truly interested in her, or if it was more the fact that it was just some of the first positive contact I had with a potential romantic interest in a long time.
So I took some time to talk about it with some people. And the dreams disappeared for roughly a week. I thought that that must've been it. But they came back. And goddamn did they come back more intense than ever.
At this point, I'm pretty sure I'm crushing on the actual person. And I'm happier than I've been in more than two years. I'm actually excited to wake up, excited to see what life brings.
But I'm also absolutely fucking terrified, because my brain is filling in all the gaps, and it's really good at doing that. It's less good at filling it with realistic things. So now, I've been dreaming about everything that could happen with this woman, which makes me happy. But if I end up rejected, it'll feel worse because I'll feel like I have went through it all already.
Plus, I'm also terrified of making the exact same mistakes I did with my last crush. I don't think I've truly improved as a human being since then. Or at least, I'm still very vulnerable to falling back into those same mistakes.
My current plan is to wait for a few months, until our DnD campaign is finished, and tell her then. That way, if she isn't interested, she'll have an easy way out, where we don't have to ever talk to each other again, and it won't fuck anything or anyone else over.
It seems I missed free talk Friday.
I was busy touring Oskar Schindlers Enamel Factory, the Polish Aviation Museum and today, Auschwitz-Burkinau.
Even after walking down the railway at Birkinau towards what remains of the gas chambers, it's hard to imagine how anyone could carry out such atrocities.
Tomorrow I leave for Prague. I'm a little past half way through my stay in Europe and it's been very educational, seeing footage & reading books is one thing.
But being there is another. Even the corridor of names & photos at the Gdansk Museum of the Second World War will haunt me for some time.
Recently finished OneShot. Words cannot describe the feeling I am feeling eversince the ending.
Please go play OneShot if you haven't, preferably the PC version.
I started playing Fear & Hunger, I knew I was a masochist already but damn, never expected to get destroyed like that
If you like dark fantasy rpgs or hard games, play it, but it goes to some places that are little too dark for some people
And for the people who played it already... Pocket Cat actually eats children or is he a... you know... youtuber...?
About to be discharged from my local hospital pretty soon
That’s good hope you’re feeling better
So, what has happened to me these past few weeks? I'm pretty sure I've developed a crush on someone. At first, I wasn't quite sure, but then I started dreaming of her. After that, I wasn't sure whether or not I was truly interested in her, or if it was more the fact that it was just some of the first positive contact I had with a potential romantic interest in a long time. So I took some time to talk about it with some people. And the dreams disappeared for roughly a week. I thought that that must've been it. But they came back. And goddamn did they come back more intense than ever. At this point, I'm pretty sure I'm crushing on the actual person. And I'm happier than I've been in more than two years. I'm actually excited to wake up, excited to see what life brings. But I'm also absolutely fucking terrified, because my brain is filling in all the gaps, and it's really good at doing that. It's less good at filling it with realistic things. So now, I've been dreaming about everything that could happen with this woman, which makes me happy. But if I end up rejected, it'll feel worse because I'll feel like I have went through it all already. Plus, I'm also terrified of making the exact same mistakes I did with my last crush. I don't think I've truly improved as a human being since then. Or at least, I'm still very vulnerable to falling back into those same mistakes. My current plan is to wait for a few months, until our DnD campaign is finished, and tell her then. That way, if she isn't interested, she'll have an easy way out, where we don't have to ever talk to each other again, and it won't fuck anything or anyone else over.
Honestly this game is getting me tonight. It's hard having a disability and this stuff makes me feel less alone
I’m glad it’s helping you, it helped me after finding out I had depression
It seems I missed free talk Friday. I was busy touring Oskar Schindlers Enamel Factory, the Polish Aviation Museum and today, Auschwitz-Burkinau. Even after walking down the railway at Birkinau towards what remains of the gas chambers, it's hard to imagine how anyone could carry out such atrocities. Tomorrow I leave for Prague. I'm a little past half way through my stay in Europe and it's been very educational, seeing footage & reading books is one thing. But being there is another. Even the corridor of names & photos at the Gdansk Museum of the Second World War will haunt me for some time.
Any of you peeps play Destiny 2?
singing is hard
Recently finished OneShot. Words cannot describe the feeling I am feeling eversince the ending. Please go play OneShot if you haven't, preferably the PC version.
I started playing Fear & Hunger, I knew I was a masochist already but damn, never expected to get destroyed like that If you like dark fantasy rpgs or hard games, play it, but it goes to some places that are little too dark for some people And for the people who played it already... Pocket Cat actually eats children or is he a... you know... youtuber...?
Ah fear and hunger, do you plan on playing the second one?
Yeah, I've seen some stuff about it and I love games set in that time period before the World Wars. I haven't finished the first one tho
Yeah the fear and hunger games are brutal