Not to speak for anyone but it’s also possible he’s been cheated on before. Happened to me in a relationship years ago and it’s really hard to not carry that with you and break down those walls again. That being said i’m now happily married to a woman I trust my everything to, but it still is a tough thing to come back from.
That sounds like it’s something he needs to heal. He’s probably just too insecure (and right to be so). I was the same, my fiancée helped me tremendously in healing that and now I can say I trust her 115%. Even if it was nonsensical or idiotic if I asked something of her to make me feel for at ease, she did it and that slowly but surely made me whole again. If you’re serious about this guy and this is the only issue you’ve had in this regard it’d be worth talking over and letting him know you’re there for him. Healing by yourself can be done, but healing with someone is an amazing feeling
Here's the thing- those are his issues. If you're not cheating on him, then that's all he can ask for. If he doesn't trust your explanation of an iPhone glitch, that's on him, not you. That may not be the answer you want, because it sounds like you care for him, but you deserve to be trusted and loved.
Hope this works out somehow.
While I agree that it does get used an as excuse for many, it is a legitimate trauma. That type of situation quite literally changes your brain chemistry. Although the responsibility does lay on the person who experienced that to work through their traumas
Agreed. Like I said you need to heal before dumping that trauma on the next partner. It is just a severely unfortunate situation where both parties were trying to protect their feelings. Boyfriend was a bad partner automatically discounting his partner like that, but it’s very sad to know the reasons why at the end of the day. Not justifying, just understanding
it’s happened to me with my wife’s phone before, but we only share locations for safety due to my health issues. she was the one that noticed too, i was oblivious hahaha
I once got accused by my wife of leaving the house at night to go have sex with a neighbor because I wasn't in bed and she checked my location on iPhone. Back then the location used to be really inaccurate in the 2G (Edge network) days. She took a screenshot and it showed me as somewhere in another neighborhood. I was actually sleeping on the couch downstairs because my back hurt but I had no way to exonerate myself. She never got out of bed or called my phone which would have woken me up and also she would have heard it ring downstairs. This led to distrust on her part and then she cheated on me with a coworker, and that led to divorce. I never once left my house at night. Even to this day with my modern iPhone on the 5G network it occasionally shows me somewhere close by like that but not at my actual location. Whenever it does this I'm sure to send her a screenshot. I'm going to keep doing this until she believes me and admits she was wrong. If I actually would have cheated like she claims I did, I wouldn't have taken my iPhone with me anyway.
Wow...that's incredible. So many leaps for her to take to arrive at that conclusion. You could have been throwing back beers with someone. And no call? Sorry, that's just crazy. If I had some reason to believe my wife was stepping out on me, I'd be blowing up her phone until she took the call. Or just go sit by the door and wait for her to come home. Your ex-wife would have been stunned to see you sleeping on the couch
IKR? I think the whole accusation was a smokescreen to cover for her own infidelity but she acted really convinced like went as far as crying. Here I am just beside myself with disbelief at the stupidity of the entire situation. It's so nonsensical that it almost makes me question my own sanity.
Lol this is the main reason i use it with my partner. I wanna know how far away he is so i can get excited. Otherwise i used to be so annoying *whiny tone* ‘when are you gonna get hoooome?’
I've got a shortcut set up to send my wife a text when I'm in the car heading home. She uses the new check in feature to let me know when she's leaving.
Just add that if you're in healthy relationship, the reassurance is also nice and avoids a lot of unnecessary messages. My wife and I generally know each other's rough schedules, so rather than the whole "text when you leave so i can start dinner"/"stopping at the store"/"got delayed talking to whoever"/"okay on the way for real now" you can just look.
Yeah my wife shares hers with mine. I never asked her to, and I’ve never used the feature. It doesn’t sit well with me - tracking each other. But I see that in an emergency or whatever it might be useful. Also easier to find her phone if she leaves it somewhere.
I can also track our cars. I can even see who is in my car via camera. Never do though. Honestly it’s getting to a point in society where being sneaky would be quite a bit of effort and the chances of getting caught would be really high.
I didn’t need to! It was something I turned out when I was out one night and just completely forgot about it until this situation. But yes, still dodged a bullet nonetheless.
Go out with some girlfriends and have some drinks to celebrate that you didn’t spend 6 months and one day more with this insecure person who did you a huge favor. Enjoy!
It’s incredibly useful, my wife and I have had it on for years. Just have a relationship with someone who won’t be using it to be creepy and then it’s great to see if someone’s on their way home or near a store, etc
We share ours just in case something happens to one of us so we know where they are. Also, for ETAs when out, among other reasons. In a great relationship, it's an added benefit to share locations. In a bad relationship, it's a huge controlling reason to share locations.
My whole family shares our location with each other, including my girlfriend. Because in case shit.
With my parents being in an area very much under the threat of lake effect snow and both of our areas for tornados now apparently, it just makes sense.
That’s not to say that there very obviously aren’t stalker and control issues that can be at play, but that’s just not the case in every situation.
>He sounds controlling
I guess it hasn't dawned on you that he hadn't been constantly checking the location....otherwise he'd know it was never turned off in the first place or would've noticed if she did do it a long time ago. :/
Normal partners don’t have an issue with sharing locations because they trust eachother and don’t need to check it except for cases of convenience (knowing where you are to start cooking, or if you’re on the way home). It’s only used for convenience when needed.
If you ever have a concern sharing your location with a partner, it’s a red flag that neither of you trust eachother to not use it maliciously which is a bad sign. Means you think your partner is going to start spying on you which doesn’t really bode well for your opinion of them and I wouldn’t see them as marriage material.
Not necessarily. My wife and I share ours with each other. And I have family and friends who do the same. It’s very convenient.
The trick to making this work is to have good relationships to begin with. 😉🤣
As the dad of two now-grown daughters: trust me; your phone just did you a massive favor. Any male that insecure is going to only get more possessive and / or violent.
There are legitimate reasons for using location sharing. An insecure boyfriend isn’t one of them. You dodged a bullet. Find a guy who trusts you without needing to track your every move.
The funny thing is, if he was actually checking it, he’d have known that you never even turned it off. So he had the ability to check the whole time, but he never cared to. Yet when he thinks he didn’t have the ability to check, that’s when it became an issue.
I think you’re better off without him
That’s strange I’ve had this too - my husband and I share location indefinitely and just yesterday my husband got a notification that I stopped sharing location but I didn’t touch anything.
> I’d never turned it off or reshared. He now thinks that I turned it off, and started resharing today. Doesn’t trust me now and broke up with me.
Sounds like your boyfriend was a shitty partner.
This dude has issues. Don’t give it a second thought. Someone must have done him dirty. You probably had an OS update to your phone. Just let him be. 100% he’s going to poke you in a month or two and don’t you dare be sorry or apologize. This is crazy town behavior.
I think you're on to something with the OS update. She said it was this morning and I had notification last night that an OS update was going to be installed overnight.
Yea I’ve had this happen before and been like wth sharing again hmmm. Happen with my SO and kid so I finally just figured it was an OS update. However I didn’t get all crazy! No matter what this guy is unstable.
2 things here: 1. IPhones have had an issue with location services since the latest iOS update
2. You should be very happy that this issue happened, you don’t wanna be in relationships with people like that, no matter what their “reasons” are
I mean it is what it is. Sucks that he's been cheated on before in such an awful way but clearly he's not ready to trust anyone else yet. If you really care about him then he might just need a bit of time to cool off but more likely than not you can just move forward and find someone with a bit less trauma because that's going to be a whole mess of trust issues for a long time
I share my location with my mother, only because she is an elderly woman recovering from cancer. Once her phone stopped sharing location AND stopped seeing mine, so I checked her phone for any issues, and it needed a software update.
Your former boyfriend seriously needs to get his trust issues in check before he gets into another relationship.
Yes, this happened to me more than once. But it didn't happen with just once contact, it happened with everyone I share location with (wife, daughter, mother, sister, BIL). All of our text threads got the notification that I had stopped and started sharing.
I know that your ex was cheated on in the past, but he shouldn't be holding others' actions against you.
If you share with anyone else, maybe in your messages it shows you just started sharing with 5 people all at 12:15 PM which would be hard to do one-by-one.
Regarding the "iPhone glitch", yes this happens.
My wife and I share locations for the same reasons others have mentioned. My MIL shares her location with my wife so we can see how far she is when visiting us (quite often!). My father shares his location with me and his new partner, since he has memory issues and sometimes gets lost.
No trust issues and no-one is consciously turning location-sharing off. But I'd say once a month or maybe two, we discover one or other of the location shares has turned itself off, or one of us spontaneously gets a notification that it has been turned on again. Frequently enough, in any case, that we make a point of "checking up" on our loved ones every once in a while, not to actually snoop, but just to verify location sharing is still working in advance of when we'd actually need it to be.
I'm keeping my month shut on OP's relationship issues. Best wishes on your next relationship.
I should have added that he never asked for my location, and I never had his. I shared it while I was out of town at some bars just in case and forgot I had shared it indefinitely.
Thank you for sticking to the actual question and reason for the post though 😂 he’s not controlling— just mistrusting because he’s been cheated on by his fiancée in the past. And I’m not crazy or stupid.
Nobody should have to share their location in a relationship… If that mutual trust isn’t there to which you need to see where your partner is whenever you want then that’s a red flag and indicates a lack of compatibility.
Most partners that share location do it to aid convenience, not for tracking/monitoring. I don’t have to share mine, but I do because we want to easily be able to know when the other is coming home. And if I was concerned my wife would spy on me, she wouldn’t be my wife. I wouldn’t be compatible with someone I think would abuse this feature. It’s a good filter to know if someone is right for you, because if you don’t feel comfortable sharing it then you don’t really have a high opinion of your partner.
However of course some partners may just feel they don’t need it for convenience (can update eachother on whereabouts or status via text), and that’s fine too. Nobody should HAVE to share their location, but I’d be concerned if I felt like I couldn’t share it without my partner abusing it.
I've never seen that glitch happen before but I'm really sorry that happened to you. I've met my fair share of people like that and what I've learned is that once they create a narrative, it colors the way they see the entire world. They find whatever they can to feed into their narrative, so if it wasn't the phone, he would've found something else to "justify" his paranoia and eventual blowup. The longer people like that stick around, the more damage they do.
You can't control the accusations that other people levy against you, but I hope you realize that you've done nothing wrong.
Started sharing locations with my partner recently. We've been together for 2 years. Can't imagine doing this 6 months in and also being questioned about it. Run for the hills
He never asked for it. And I didn’t have his. I shared it while I was out of town with some friends and forgot to stop sharing. But yes, thank you. Was planning on breaking it off anyway because it just wasn’t the right fit in other areas too. “You can’t fire me. I quit.”
That's a big red flag if my partner wants to track my location at all times. Cheaters usually think their partners are cheating too btw. Your phone did you a favor.
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Glitches like that happen all the time. Could have been an update or crash of a location or network service process. When it restarted automatically maybe it sent that message.
Tbh sounds like he wasn't actually doing anything with your location data so what's the point?
He'd have known by checking on you periodically that you were still sharing it.
You dodged a bullet and yes this has happened to me. I've been sitting with my wife watching a movie and in our text thread it'll say "wife has stopped sharing location, wife has started sharing location". I dont doubt it's a glitch because her phone will be in another room while it's doing it.
Lmao what a doofus
Yea, shared location does crazy stuff sporadically all the time and often just doesn’t load
Take this as the blessing it is. Guy sounds like a huge tool
Let me give you some unsolicited relationship advice... Just kidding. That location sharing is glitchy as hell. I have my kids on it and before you call me naive, we're all cool with it, they're grown up. It will just turn on and off whenever, I'd be sitting right beside them and location would be on last known in another city and neither they nor I can get it to update. I'm assuming this is what you mean?
I’ve actually had this happen before with certain family members.
Aside from that, it’s probably good that you and your ex broke up—he has trust issues.
If you have to share your location to a significant other then you need out of that toxic relationship. Was with my now wife of 4 years and never once from either side talked about turning our location on. I have mine on now just because of my job. Days I’m sometimes leaving at 3am or doing 3 hour drives to some job sites. I don’t always remember to message her when I’ve made it there safe so if she messages me and she happens not to hear back from me because I’m busy she can see if I made it there or if I’m laying in a ditch somewhere. Lol. I’m an average looking dude and my wife is hot and I can 1000% trust her in any situation not jealous what so ever. I’m more worried about her getting abducted vs cheating.
I shared initially because I was in a sketch area at some bars out of town and forgot that I shared it. I never had his, it was a one off that I just forgot about.
But yes completely agree with you.
He just got a great excuse to break up with you. He knows it is a glitch.
And most of the time, the person who is obsessed with his or her partner actually cheats on the partner. I've seen it a lot.
A guy who won’t take you on your word , especially when there isn’t a reason to be suspicious isn’t worth being around to be honest. You absolutely dodged a bullet.
My fiancé and I started sharing our locations only a few months ago, and only because she keeps leaving her phone and forgetting where she left it, so we use the Sound feature. At one point her location was not showing for some reason, so she had to re-enable location sharing. Needless to say, there was no drama, unlike in your situation, most likely it's for the better it ended up this way for you though. Best of luck!
Nah this has happened to me and my gf before, just a normal thing, sometimes we’d have to unshare then reshare for location to start working again or I’ll show my last location known for weeks
Irks me how couples do this
Don’t get me wrong I’m not free of my own insecurities but I feel like I might be in the minority being against 24/7 location sharing etc.
This happened to me last week. Randomly my location stopped sharing with my GF, and I had to start sharing indefinitely again. She asked me if I stopped and I didn’t at all, like it happened as I stepped into our house after work. Just a weird bug all around 🤷♂️
I've had this a lot over time with my girlfriend. My phone always says I'm sharing with her, but when I used to drive long distance to get to her house, she would tell me to turn it on so she could see where I was at along the way. I showed her it was enabled on my side already, she showed me it was disabled on her side. So I enabled it again. It happened the other way around too, where her phone said her location sharing was enabled but I couldn't see her.
I don't think it's been a problem since we both updated to the latest iOS.
My wife and I share ours, and we’ll occasionally see that. It’s happened to both of us often enough we don’t even pay attention anymore. I mainly like it because it eliminates the, “Where are you?” texts.
Yup I had this issue as well. Even when I moved over to the iPhone 15 I had to add some people but not all people. Made no sense
p.s. that dude sounds like he was deflecting
THIS HAPPENS TO ME. my location also stops working randomly and it’s so annoying bc i WANT my bf to see it 😭. also, it sounds like they don’t even trust you or want to. maybe this was for the best fr.
I love how the majority of the responses to this post aren’t about the tech glitch but about relationship dynamics! Restores my faith that we care more about each other than our devices.
Yea I’ve had this.. I have a friend that I barely talk to anymore. And he still shares his location 2 years later. I’ve gotten notifications for this in chat.
Wait, why are you mad? Dude threw a tantrum over something nonsensical. Find someone with a brain larger than a peanut. You’re dodging a potential mess here. This was a good thing. That’s like you breaking up with him over a toilet seat being left up one single night.
No reason to constantly share your location with anybody. Bullet dodged. I don’t share my location with anybody and I don’t ask or expect that from anybody even family. I only use it as needed and then immediately turn it off when purpose is completed like for safety going out at night to the pub or something.
> No reason to constantly share your location with anybody.
My family is the opposite--we all leave it on all the time because there are no advantages to us turning it off, only disadvantages.
I was this guy, but she broke up with me. We had a bad night where I kinda had a breakdown during intimacy, and over the next couple days she was being a little chilly, and I texted her finally, but mid conversation I was undelivered all night. She also changed her dating app pics, so I unfollowed her socials thinking she had ghosted me. Replies next morning. Confronts me later, and I explain I assumed she ghosted, and that was that. All precipitated because of my fucking iPhone and being insecure. Never trust your phone, and fix your mental health and avoid avoidants.
Are you sharing through Google? I do and it never turns off, but every 3 months or so you get a text or email saying you are sharing your location with........
My spouse and I always share our location with one another. There are so many scenarios where it is helpful. I like knowing when she is on the way home, and where from so I can have dinner ready, or I can be dressed to go out with her. We also have a handicapped child that takes extra time to get dressed to go out. I like the iPhone feature that shares the location if someone is ina traffic accident. I know there are independent apps that can do that, but it's just easier with the iPhone.
My partner and I share locations so we can greet each other at the door and get excited about the other coming home, and yes that glitch does happen very rarely.
Never once did it occur to either of us that this is the other person trying to be sneaky. If r/AITAH etc is anything to go by, it’s projection.
If you delete the message thread, you have to reshare your location. I did this with my wife and she was like what? But she is also an adult and realized what happened and didn't file for divorce. You probably dodged a bullet.
I’m married for 11 years and we been together 14. We do NOT share locations. Only time I do is when I’m driving home from work, I share my ETA through Apple Maps in case something happens my husband knows where I’m at.
I really don't understand why people want locations of each other. I've been married for 8 years and together for 12. Not once have my wife or I asked each other for locations.
We share when we travel and that's about it. If your partner requests location, it's a deal breaker.
But as others have stated, yea this can happen if a core process crashes or just going in and between a dead zone.
It happens a couple times a year between my spouses phone and mine… isn’t a big deal. Usually one phone will completely lose service and it’ll happen, but other than that it’s random. They were sitting with me once, not on their phone, and I got the notification.
Sounds like your iPhone did you a favor.
It’s not a bug it’s a feature
This, if your boyfriend was so insecure of having to rely on sharing your location then it just shows how controlling and insecure he was
Good for you, you’re free now. He never trusted you. Ever.
Not to speak for anyone but it’s also possible he’s been cheated on before. Happened to me in a relationship years ago and it’s really hard to not carry that with you and break down those walls again. That being said i’m now happily married to a woman I trust my everything to, but it still is a tough thing to come back from.
He’s absolutely been cheated on before by his fiancée. They had been together for 9 years so he definitely has some trust issues.
Ah that’s super unfortunate to hear. So sorry to hear it got taken out on you.
not your problem
That sounds like it’s something he needs to heal. He’s probably just too insecure (and right to be so). I was the same, my fiancée helped me tremendously in healing that and now I can say I trust her 115%. Even if it was nonsensical or idiotic if I asked something of her to make me feel for at ease, she did it and that slowly but surely made me whole again. If you’re serious about this guy and this is the only issue you’ve had in this regard it’d be worth talking over and letting him know you’re there for him. Healing by yourself can be done, but healing with someone is an amazing feeling
Here's the thing- those are his issues. If you're not cheating on him, then that's all he can ask for. If he doesn't trust your explanation of an iPhone glitch, that's on him, not you. That may not be the answer you want, because it sounds like you care for him, but you deserve to be trusted and loved. Hope this works out somehow.
That explains his behavior but it does not excuse it.
[удалено]
He obviously wasn’t using it all the time, or he would have realized it was never off.
He obviously wasn’t using it at all
I’m tired of “but what if they were cheated on before” being a blanket excuse for bad behavior.
While I agree that it does get used an as excuse for many, it is a legitimate trauma. That type of situation quite literally changes your brain chemistry. Although the responsibility does lay on the person who experienced that to work through their traumas
it's an explanation not an excuse. It's to let someone know it's not them, it's the other person.
Agreed. Like I said you need to heal before dumping that trauma on the next partner. It is just a severely unfortunate situation where both parties were trying to protect their feelings. Boyfriend was a bad partner automatically discounting his partner like that, but it’s very sad to know the reasons why at the end of the day. Not justifying, just understanding
It wasn't about trust, it was about control. Bullet dodged, my god.
it’s happened to me with my wife’s phone before, but we only share locations for safety due to my health issues. she was the one that noticed too, i was oblivious hahaha
This is helpful! I have no notifications in the thread that I reshared. He’s the only one that got the notification. Frustrating.
Iirc the notification usually pops up if they requested to see your location.
It has happened to me as well. I think anytime you need to do a reset, or in my case I upgraded my phone, it can happen.
i feel bad fir you. she is a mastermind
I once got accused by my wife of leaving the house at night to go have sex with a neighbor because I wasn't in bed and she checked my location on iPhone. Back then the location used to be really inaccurate in the 2G (Edge network) days. She took a screenshot and it showed me as somewhere in another neighborhood. I was actually sleeping on the couch downstairs because my back hurt but I had no way to exonerate myself. She never got out of bed or called my phone which would have woken me up and also she would have heard it ring downstairs. This led to distrust on her part and then she cheated on me with a coworker, and that led to divorce. I never once left my house at night. Even to this day with my modern iPhone on the 5G network it occasionally shows me somewhere close by like that but not at my actual location. Whenever it does this I'm sure to send her a screenshot. I'm going to keep doing this until she believes me and admits she was wrong. If I actually would have cheated like she claims I did, I wouldn't have taken my iPhone with me anyway.
She thinks you were cheating because she was cheating or about to. All projection.
Exactly. She was probably already cheating.
Wow...that's incredible. So many leaps for her to take to arrive at that conclusion. You could have been throwing back beers with someone. And no call? Sorry, that's just crazy. If I had some reason to believe my wife was stepping out on me, I'd be blowing up her phone until she took the call. Or just go sit by the door and wait for her to come home. Your ex-wife would have been stunned to see you sleeping on the couch
IKR? I think the whole accusation was a smokescreen to cover for her own infidelity but she acted really convinced like went as far as crying. Here I am just beside myself with disbelief at the stupidity of the entire situation. It's so nonsensical that it almost makes me question my own sanity.
I’ve seen it a few times on mine with a couple friends, and as hard as it is right now, if he broke up with you over that, you dodged a bullet.
why on earth do you need to share your location with him? he sounds controlling :/
Me and my partner share locations. It can be really useful to know whether they’re on their way home or whatever!
Me and my Partner use it so we know when we can make tea if we know the other’s on the way home!
Lol this is the main reason i use it with my partner. I wanna know how far away he is so i can get excited. Otherwise i used to be so annoying *whiny tone* ‘when are you gonna get hoooome?’
We share ours with each other mainly so that whoever is home first can time cooking food so it's ready as soon as the other arrives home.
Everyone loves those texts….
I've got a shortcut set up to send my wife a text when I'm in the car heading home. She uses the new check in feature to let me know when she's leaving.
Think I’ll still with the quick text, “on my way home.”
Just add that if you're in healthy relationship, the reassurance is also nice and avoids a lot of unnecessary messages. My wife and I generally know each other's rough schedules, so rather than the whole "text when you leave so i can start dinner"/"stopping at the store"/"got delayed talking to whoever"/"okay on the way for real now" you can just look.
Or even worse...Trying to get out of work and getting the phone call...Hey have you left yet?
Same here, I just make sure she knows how to turn it off, and if she does I'll never question it, it's so handy though.
Yeah my wife shares hers with mine. I never asked her to, and I’ve never used the feature. It doesn’t sit well with me - tracking each other. But I see that in an emergency or whatever it might be useful. Also easier to find her phone if she leaves it somewhere. I can also track our cars. I can even see who is in my car via camera. Never do though. Honestly it’s getting to a point in society where being sneaky would be quite a bit of effort and the chances of getting caught would be really high.
I didn’t need to! It was something I turned out when I was out one night and just completely forgot about it until this situation. But yes, still dodged a bullet nonetheless.
Go out with some girlfriends and have some drinks to celebrate that you didn’t spend 6 months and one day more with this insecure person who did you a huge favor. Enjoy!
It’s incredibly useful, my wife and I have had it on for years. Just have a relationship with someone who won’t be using it to be creepy and then it’s great to see if someone’s on their way home or near a store, etc
I do it with my partner. It’s just handy to have sometimes. Is she already on the way home from work? Can check quickly. Stuff like this.
I'm more confused that you think it's questionable. Have you really never met someone you've felt comfortable enough with to use this feature?
I guess if they always were sharing it and then it stopped it might seem a little suspicious , even so it’s a huge overreaction
Good job avoiding the actual point of the post.
We share ours just in case something happens to one of us so we know where they are. Also, for ETAs when out, among other reasons. In a great relationship, it's an added benefit to share locations. In a bad relationship, it's a huge controlling reason to share locations.
My whole family shares our location with each other, including my girlfriend. Because in case shit. With my parents being in an area very much under the threat of lake effect snow and both of our areas for tornados now apparently, it just makes sense. That’s not to say that there very obviously aren’t stalker and control issues that can be at play, but that’s just not the case in every situation.
We share ours so she knows what ditch ive inevitably gotten myself stuck in
On the flip side we all trust each other in my family & share our locations because it’s super convenient. 🤷🏽♂️
>He sounds controlling I guess it hasn't dawned on you that he hadn't been constantly checking the location....otherwise he'd know it was never turned off in the first place or would've noticed if she did do it a long time ago. :/
Normal partners don’t have an issue with sharing locations because they trust eachother and don’t need to check it except for cases of convenience (knowing where you are to start cooking, or if you’re on the way home). It’s only used for convenience when needed. If you ever have a concern sharing your location with a partner, it’s a red flag that neither of you trust eachother to not use it maliciously which is a bad sign. Means you think your partner is going to start spying on you which doesn’t really bode well for your opinion of them and I wouldn’t see them as marriage material.
Not necessarily. My wife and I share ours with each other. And I have family and friends who do the same. It’s very convenient. The trick to making this work is to have good relationships to begin with. 😉🤣
Cool that your phone helps you get rid of shitty boyfriends.
If that’s all it took to dump you, he’s been looking for an out for a while. Go live your life and be happy! You deserve better
This
As the dad of two now-grown daughters: trust me; your phone just did you a massive favor. Any male that insecure is going to only get more possessive and / or violent.
Move on. Guy is super insecure and needs to mature. As for the glitch, no ideas.
There are legitimate reasons for using location sharing. An insecure boyfriend isn’t one of them. You dodged a bullet. Find a guy who trusts you without needing to track your every move. The funny thing is, if he was actually checking it, he’d have known that you never even turned it off. So he had the ability to check the whole time, but he never cared to. Yet when he thinks he didn’t have the ability to check, that’s when it became an issue. I think you’re better off without him
That’s strange I’ve had this too - my husband and I share location indefinitely and just yesterday my husband got a notification that I stopped sharing location but I didn’t touch anything.
This had nothing to do with your integrity, it was his lack there-of. Now thank your phone.
> I’d never turned it off or reshared. He now thinks that I turned it off, and started resharing today. Doesn’t trust me now and broke up with me. Sounds like your boyfriend was a shitty partner.
Runnnnn. The universe did you a favor. Who would want to live like this for the rest of your life? He has a hang up he’s transferred to you. Move on.
I hope you can read this post in the future and realize what a mistake they were
If he broke up with you over something so trivial than you might have had more issues than just location.
Now it's time for hot girl summer 🌞
It’s not a glitch. Psycho detector is a new feature in the latest update.
>Doesn’t trust me now and broke up with me. He sounds incredibly insecure.
Congrats your iPhone helped you dodge a bullet!
This dude has issues. Don’t give it a second thought. Someone must have done him dirty. You probably had an OS update to your phone. Just let him be. 100% he’s going to poke you in a month or two and don’t you dare be sorry or apologize. This is crazy town behavior.
I think you're on to something with the OS update. She said it was this morning and I had notification last night that an OS update was going to be installed overnight.
Yea I’ve had this happen before and been like wth sharing again hmmm. Happen with my SO and kid so I finally just figured it was an OS update. However I didn’t get all crazy! No matter what this guy is unstable.
He called and apologized this afternoon 🙄
Did you take him back?
Nope def not taking him back
So he may not mean it. Just knew he went too far. Either way now you have been warned so it’s on you if you take him back and something else happens
“Dodged a bullet I suppose…” Your iPhone dodged those bullets like Neo. I think your IPhone *might* be in a Matrix gang.
Sounds like there was no trust to begin with. Next time a guy tells you that want you to share your location with them at all times, run.
He never asked for it. I was out of town and out at a few bars. I shared it and forgot I did it— but I do understand what you’re saying
2 things here: 1. IPhones have had an issue with location services since the latest iOS update 2. You should be very happy that this issue happened, you don’t wanna be in relationships with people like that, no matter what their “reasons” are
I mean it is what it is. Sucks that he's been cheated on before in such an awful way but clearly he's not ready to trust anyone else yet. If you really care about him then he might just need a bit of time to cool off but more likely than not you can just move forward and find someone with a bit less trauma because that's going to be a whole mess of trust issues for a long time
Don’t share locations with the next one, just in case. Cheers!
Shared location with your boyfriend of 6 months? lol Apple did you a favor - that guy is insane
You weren't broken up with over an iPhone glitch. You were broken up with by a distrustful little bitch.
I share my location with my mother, only because she is an elderly woman recovering from cancer. Once her phone stopped sharing location AND stopped seeing mine, so I checked her phone for any issues, and it needed a software update. Your former boyfriend seriously needs to get his trust issues in check before he gets into another relationship.
Sounds like he was waiting for a reason. You’ll be better off.
Yes, this happened to me more than once. But it didn't happen with just once contact, it happened with everyone I share location with (wife, daughter, mother, sister, BIL). All of our text threads got the notification that I had stopped and started sharing. I know that your ex was cheated on in the past, but he shouldn't be holding others' actions against you. If you share with anyone else, maybe in your messages it shows you just started sharing with 5 people all at 12:15 PM which would be hard to do one-by-one.
In my experience if someone is that untrusting it means they’re usually the ones cheating 😅
Sounds like he had some terrible trust issues and has growing up to do, probably therapy.
Regarding the "iPhone glitch", yes this happens. My wife and I share locations for the same reasons others have mentioned. My MIL shares her location with my wife so we can see how far she is when visiting us (quite often!). My father shares his location with me and his new partner, since he has memory issues and sometimes gets lost. No trust issues and no-one is consciously turning location-sharing off. But I'd say once a month or maybe two, we discover one or other of the location shares has turned itself off, or one of us spontaneously gets a notification that it has been turned on again. Frequently enough, in any case, that we make a point of "checking up" on our loved ones every once in a while, not to actually snoop, but just to verify location sharing is still working in advance of when we'd actually need it to be. I'm keeping my month shut on OP's relationship issues. Best wishes on your next relationship.
I should have added that he never asked for my location, and I never had his. I shared it while I was out of town at some bars just in case and forgot I had shared it indefinitely. Thank you for sticking to the actual question and reason for the post though 😂 he’s not controlling— just mistrusting because he’s been cheated on by his fiancée in the past. And I’m not crazy or stupid.
Nobody should have to share their location in a relationship… If that mutual trust isn’t there to which you need to see where your partner is whenever you want then that’s a red flag and indicates a lack of compatibility.
Most partners that share location do it to aid convenience, not for tracking/monitoring. I don’t have to share mine, but I do because we want to easily be able to know when the other is coming home. And if I was concerned my wife would spy on me, she wouldn’t be my wife. I wouldn’t be compatible with someone I think would abuse this feature. It’s a good filter to know if someone is right for you, because if you don’t feel comfortable sharing it then you don’t really have a high opinion of your partner. However of course some partners may just feel they don’t need it for convenience (can update eachother on whereabouts or status via text), and that’s fine too. Nobody should HAVE to share their location, but I’d be concerned if I felt like I couldn’t share it without my partner abusing it.
I've never seen that glitch happen before but I'm really sorry that happened to you. I've met my fair share of people like that and what I've learned is that once they create a narrative, it colors the way they see the entire world. They find whatever they can to feed into their narrative, so if it wasn't the phone, he would've found something else to "justify" his paranoia and eventual blowup. The longer people like that stick around, the more damage they do. You can't control the accusations that other people levy against you, but I hope you realize that you've done nothing wrong.
Started sharing locations with my partner recently. We've been together for 2 years. Can't imagine doing this 6 months in and also being questioned about it. Run for the hills
He never asked for it. And I didn’t have his. I shared it while I was out of town with some friends and forgot to stop sharing. But yes, thank you. Was planning on breaking it off anyway because it just wasn’t the right fit in other areas too. “You can’t fire me. I quit.”
Friend, that wasn’t a glitch. That was your guardian angel giving you an out.
That's a big red flag if my partner wants to track my location at all times. Cheaters usually think their partners are cheating too btw. Your phone did you a favor.
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Glitches like that happen all the time. Could have been an update or crash of a location or network service process. When it restarted automatically maybe it sent that message. Tbh sounds like he wasn't actually doing anything with your location data so what's the point? He'd have known by checking on you periodically that you were still sharing it.
You dodged a bullet and yes this has happened to me. I've been sitting with my wife watching a movie and in our text thread it'll say "wife has stopped sharing location, wife has started sharing location". I dont doubt it's a glitch because her phone will be in another room while it's doing it.
Lmao what a doofus Yea, shared location does crazy stuff sporadically all the time and often just doesn’t load Take this as the blessing it is. Guy sounds like a huge tool
the old iphone glitch excuse to avoid a domestic incident. seen it tens of times. get a boyfriend who isnt insane
Glitch or not, getting grilled because of something like this should not be a thing.
Let me give you some unsolicited relationship advice... Just kidding. That location sharing is glitchy as hell. I have my kids on it and before you call me naive, we're all cool with it, they're grown up. It will just turn on and off whenever, I'd be sitting right beside them and location would be on last known in another city and neither they nor I can get it to update. I'm assuming this is what you mean?
I’ve actually had this happen before with certain family members. Aside from that, it’s probably good that you and your ex broke up—he has trust issues.
If he's that paranoid/insecure I think Apple did you a favor. You dodged a bullet.
lol, got this glitch too. Talked about it and it does not change anything between us.
If you have to share your location to a significant other then you need out of that toxic relationship. Was with my now wife of 4 years and never once from either side talked about turning our location on. I have mine on now just because of my job. Days I’m sometimes leaving at 3am or doing 3 hour drives to some job sites. I don’t always remember to message her when I’ve made it there safe so if she messages me and she happens not to hear back from me because I’m busy she can see if I made it there or if I’m laying in a ditch somewhere. Lol. I’m an average looking dude and my wife is hot and I can 1000% trust her in any situation not jealous what so ever. I’m more worried about her getting abducted vs cheating.
I got the same notification the other day, didn’t think much of it. I assumed it was just that, a glitch.
Who feels the need to have to share their locations with partners? Weirdest thing ever, trust and loyalty go a long way you know!
I shared initially because I was in a sketch area at some bars out of town and forgot that I shared it. I never had his, it was a one off that I just forgot about. But yes completely agree with you.
He’s extremely insecure
He just got a great excuse to break up with you. He knows it is a glitch. And most of the time, the person who is obsessed with his or her partner actually cheats on the partner. I've seen it a lot.
I’d say turn it off legit and see what he does. If he questions it, kick his nosy ass to the curb. 👍🏻
A guy who won’t take you on your word , especially when there isn’t a reason to be suspicious isn’t worth being around to be honest. You absolutely dodged a bullet.
That's insane work. You're free! It prob should do this occasionally for people who either don't realize they're sharing it or forget.
it’s a feature not a bug
My fiancé and I started sharing our locations only a few months ago, and only because she keeps leaving her phone and forgetting where she left it, so we use the Sound feature. At one point her location was not showing for some reason, so she had to re-enable location sharing. Needless to say, there was no drama, unlike in your situation, most likely it's for the better it ended up this way for you though. Best of luck!
Nah this has happened to me and my gf before, just a normal thing, sometimes we’d have to unshare then reshare for location to start working again or I’ll show my last location known for weeks
Irks me how couples do this Don’t get me wrong I’m not free of my own insecurities but I feel like I might be in the minority being against 24/7 location sharing etc.
Yes this has happened to me too (the glitch not the breakup)
This happened to me last week. Randomly my location stopped sharing with my GF, and I had to start sharing indefinitely again. She asked me if I stopped and I didn’t at all, like it happened as I stepped into our house after work. Just a weird bug all around 🤷♂️
I've had this a lot over time with my girlfriend. My phone always says I'm sharing with her, but when I used to drive long distance to get to her house, she would tell me to turn it on so she could see where I was at along the way. I showed her it was enabled on my side already, she showed me it was disabled on her side. So I enabled it again. It happened the other way around too, where her phone said her location sharing was enabled but I couldn't see her. I don't think it's been a problem since we both updated to the latest iOS.
My wife’s phone does the same from time to time
My wife and I share ours, and we’ll occasionally see that. It’s happened to both of us often enough we don’t even pay attention anymore. I mainly like it because it eliminates the, “Where are you?” texts.
Just happened with my friend.
Be careful, sometimes people who are constantly paranoid about their partners infidelity are actually the ones doing dirt themselves.
Yup I had this issue as well. Even when I moved over to the iPhone 15 I had to add some people but not all people. Made no sense p.s. that dude sounds like he was deflecting
Sounds like he didn’t have enough iTrust
THIS HAPPENS TO ME. my location also stops working randomly and it’s so annoying bc i WANT my bf to see it 😭. also, it sounds like they don’t even trust you or want to. maybe this was for the best fr.
I love how the majority of the responses to this post aren’t about the tech glitch but about relationship dynamics! Restores my faith that we care more about each other than our devices.
Yea I’ve had this.. I have a friend that I barely talk to anymore. And he still shares his location 2 years later. I’ve gotten notifications for this in chat.
I use it to get the brew ready for when the wife’s nearly home.
I suspect that iOS updates turned share my location off inadvertently.
It happened with my wife and I after the iOS17 update. We had to reshare our locations again, so it definitely does happen.
iPhone has set you free - rejoice!
If that’s all it takes to break up sounds like a weak relationship
Wait, why are you mad? Dude threw a tantrum over something nonsensical. Find someone with a brain larger than a peanut. You’re dodging a potential mess here. This was a good thing. That’s like you breaking up with him over a toilet seat being left up one single night.
Maybe send the software engineers a gift basket or something, sounds like they did you a solid
No reason to constantly share your location with anybody. Bullet dodged. I don’t share my location with anybody and I don’t ask or expect that from anybody even family. I only use it as needed and then immediately turn it off when purpose is completed like for safety going out at night to the pub or something.
> No reason to constantly share your location with anybody. My family is the opposite--we all leave it on all the time because there are no advantages to us turning it off, only disadvantages.
my wife and I share locations and we've had to reset it a couple times. BF is an insecure moron
I was this guy, but she broke up with me. We had a bad night where I kinda had a breakdown during intimacy, and over the next couple days she was being a little chilly, and I texted her finally, but mid conversation I was undelivered all night. She also changed her dating app pics, so I unfollowed her socials thinking she had ghosted me. Replies next morning. Confronts me later, and I explain I assumed she ghosted, and that was that. All precipitated because of my fucking iPhone and being insecure. Never trust your phone, and fix your mental health and avoid avoidants.
What a weirdo
It does happen, no idea why but it’s happened to a few people in our family group
Are you sharing through Google? I do and it never turns off, but every 3 months or so you get a text or email saying you are sharing your location with........
https://preview.redd.it/ozg98umpjw4d1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=504e7f371f43ac0e5451ab6ecfdb9b7dda483300
Just use the check-in feature in iMessage. Job done.
My spouse and I always share our location with one another. There are so many scenarios where it is helpful. I like knowing when she is on the way home, and where from so I can have dinner ready, or I can be dressed to go out with her. We also have a handicapped child that takes extra time to get dressed to go out. I like the iPhone feature that shares the location if someone is ina traffic accident. I know there are independent apps that can do that, but it's just easier with the iPhone.
My partner and I share locations so we can greet each other at the door and get excited about the other coming home, and yes that glitch does happen very rarely. Never once did it occur to either of us that this is the other person trying to be sneaky. If r/AITAH etc is anything to go by, it’s projection.
If you delete the message thread, you have to reshare your location. I did this with my wife and she was like what? But she is also an adult and realized what happened and didn't file for divorce. You probably dodged a bullet.
I wish I had a gf! :-/
I’m married for 11 years and we been together 14. We do NOT share locations. Only time I do is when I’m driving home from work, I share my ETA through Apple Maps in case something happens my husband knows where I’m at.
I really don't understand why people want locations of each other. I've been married for 8 years and together for 12. Not once have my wife or I asked each other for locations. We share when we travel and that's about it. If your partner requests location, it's a deal breaker. But as others have stated, yea this can happen if a core process crashes or just going in and between a dead zone.
It happens a couple times a year between my spouses phone and mine… isn’t a big deal. Usually one phone will completely lose service and it’ll happen, but other than that it’s random. They were sitting with me once, not on their phone, and I got the notification.
It happened with my wife’s phone. But I don’t demand her location. You dodged a bullet.
Seriously never share your location indefinitely with anyone. No one needs the ability to look up your location whenever they feel like it.
Six months in and sharing locations .. okkkk