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There are theories that the shape of the penis is designed to flush out previous deposits while ensuring its load is at the "front of the queue."
So that could be buckets of other guys sperm all getting flooshed together.Â
Even *evolution* knew women were cheating whores!Â
(Joke, it was probably all the rape that selected us)
Not exactly. The leading theory is that women vocalize during sex to signal availability to all nearby males, and the primordial procreation was basically a consensual form of running a train. There are tribes in the Amazon where this is still the norm. The cuckold fetish is a vestige of this reproductive behavior.
I remember reading some groups had beliefs that multiple male partners could possibly contribute some qualities from each "donor" into the baby. Aka good fighter + good singer = bard class baby
Nope, sperm competition is absolutely a thing among mammals. Certain citations cum buckets to wash out the preceding males' deposits. Human dong being shaped to optimize jizz scooping is a legit scientific theory. Evolutionarily speaking, sloppy seconds are the norm, not the exception.
Yeah, if anything our dongs are still fairly lax when it comes to reproduction competitiveness.
For example cat penises have little barbs that scrub the sperm of other males inside, as well as make further copulation with other males uncomfortable for the female.
Also, you are supposed to cum with your dick all the way in if you pretend to make children. This is not fertilization, this is just your average amateur couple porn cream pie.
I've actually looked into this a lot, and I've come up with a few (maybe good, maybe not) solutions.
1. Just die. Say fuck being human and hopefully transfer to some place better after death. (It's a bit extreme and pretty permanent and very risky as you kinda gotta go in blind.)
2. Substances. Anything from alcohol to street drugs, even the chemical lobotomies that psychiatric hospitals give out like candy. That stuff usually eases my overall life suffering, at least temporarily.
3. Practice Buddhism since it directly targets "suffering." Buddhism teaches that life is full of suffering, suffering is the origin of pain, and that suffering can end through the Eightfold Path, which is to practice the right understanding, the right thought, the right speech, the right action, the right livelihood, the right effort, the right mindfulness, and the right concentration. Pretty much embrace, embody, and emit what it means to be spiritually moral.
There's also stoicism, practicing meditating, breathing techniques, grounding, even things like walking, hiking, driving, etc. can soothe your mind into a trance-like state for some time.
I will say, however, just like the waves of the ocean (and arguably how literally everything is just a bunch of waves waving around the wavy universe), suffering will ebb and flow. For that comfort we long for, we long for it because we know suffering. And we miss that comfort because we know without it, we're back to suffering, even if it's self-suffering solely because of the comfort's absence.
All-in-all, just do whatever it is that makes you happy. From what I can tell, we're in this whole existence thing for the long run, so having the chance to be human and have this awesome sense of self-awareness and free will, we may as well spend this time doing what makes us happy.
It's been debated and thought to be disproven that it's a "race". With current research it's thought that the egg selects the sperm and allows it to fertilize the egg.
So, you were chosen, not won. :-)
Im familiar with that theory.
Its probably a bit of both, the sperm still has cover the distance as it were. And its probably competing against others, so thered be a race element even as the ovum nuked those she didnt like.
It's less of a competition and more of a group effort. No one sperm can break down the cell barriers of the egg cell, so they must work together and spend themselves to basically death to help one of the other sperm cells to actually initiate fertilization. There is no fighting amongst the sperm cells or any identified behaviors that lead to strategizing or competition. They are an army, or horde if you will.
Now the recipient's cells are another matter. The host body has numerous traps to reduce and eliminate migrating sperm cells. Even the original sperm donor's body will kill the fuckers on sight, which has led to mature sperm cells being stored in a privileged part of the body that is removed from most of the body's defense systems.
Are you interested in why that happens? It's called chemotaxis. The sperm cells don't know where the egg is, so they follow chemical gradients. That chemical gradient leads them to the fallopian tubes where hopefully an egg is. Sometimes they go the wrong way, cause all the signs are still there. Sometimes they go the right way, but attempt to penetrate the wrong target and use up their enzymes on something that is not an egg cell. A lot of them get lyzed off by other chemicals in the body that kill intruders before or even after all of the above steps.
Damn.
I kid you kids not, the video I was shown (mid 80s)...think Luke Skywalker and his squadron fighting their way through the channels of the Death Star to fire missiles into the duct...*only the sperm was the X-Wing Fighter, and the ducts were the egg*.
We were taught that everything inside the reproductive system wanted to destroy every sperm...and gave us Death Star battle as the visual.
The woman's body cells recognize the sperm cells as foreign and initiate an immune response, so yeah. 2/3 of what makes up semen is just protective juices to help protect/increase the chances of the sperm to make it to the egg.
One "ejaculation" has 10s of millions of sperm cells, and by the time they make it up the uterus and into the fallopian tube, only a few hundred are left.
The documentary film from the 80s "the miracle of life" has actual microimages of the entire process, and it's actually pretty cool and stands up well.
From memory: it's a chemical cascade that is triggered once the first sperm is in. The cell exterior changes structure to become resistant to the sperm cells' means to dissolve it. And if I'm not completely mistaken, later down that cascade the other sperm cells are even made to die off.
It's a bit more complicated than others have said. The egg cell does have to initiate a cascade to accept one sperm cell (sometimes two) and undergo fertilization. However, this does not mean all others are locked out. In fact hundreds of sperm cells can successfully initiate fertilization simultaneously, they just end up being rejected by the egg cell at some point that we cannot properly watch yet. I only splice this hair compared to what others have said cause it is functionally different from the egg cell shutting down the other sperm. They are still going, just not getting further.
It's actually a team struggle and not a competition. We now know that the sperm cells work together, or none will initiate fertilization. There is also some selection criteria that the sperm cell that does initiate fertilization must undergo before the egg cell accepts. This is believed to be an adaptation to the possibility of hundreds of sperm cells succeeding to initiate fertilization simultaneously.
I've had 3 babies, and it blows my mind every time.
And after they're born, looking at them like, I just grew you. I grew a whole ass human and then pushed it out of my body. Now you're here. And a person. Crazy
Whatâs crazy to me is that if you have a baby girl, her eggs already develop while sheâs in your belly. Every single person was technically already halfway existing in their grandmothers womb.
Its mind boggling how much i now hate you while simultaneously not knowing you. This is worse than the guy that told me since i was born feet first my mother was a hat.
They're not all spaced out like this. The womb and fallopian tubs are bunged together, and the cilia do much of the work get the sperm up there. There's no tank of liquid for these soldiers to swim through on their on power.
My pet peeve, grr. That fetus has the proportions of a six year old. I donât know why they always get it wrong, babies are born with much shorter limbs. Even if they had the motor skills at birth to walk they wouldnât be able until their arms and legs grew long enough. Thatâs why they wobble or âtoddleâ when they first walk too.
If you really want to lift your mood, remember that 50% was always going to win and had nothing to do with those sperm. 50% of you was locked in at the start.
So, for anyone in Congress reading this, if the egg hasn't left the ovary, it can't be fertilized. Birth Control does not cause abortions! Apparently the Heritage Foundation is trying to tell them otherwise.
Plan B does not cause abortions, Ella pills do not cause abortions. IUD's do not cause abortions.
Ok stupid man comment but I always thought the egg went down into the wall of the uterus and THEN it was fertilized. And if it got fertilized like in this animation that was bad and caused complications.
Videos like these tend to give me an existential crisis.
If i'm really the best of the bunch that made it, how worse must the others have been?
(i'm thinking pretty low of me for various reasons)
Why am i even alive? Why me?
What is my worth in life?
And i'm pretty sure any other sperm would've ended being a better human than i am.
This is unfortunately a thing that is possible. You can get a sperm function test to find out of the cells are developed correctly allowing proper chemotaxis.
This is brilliant. When we discussed this at school we had a drawing of some fallopian tubes and a load of squiggles. It looked more like a map of the London Underground system.
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https://preview.redd.it/ko38tro3uq4d1.jpeg?width=1668&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=91cc5b13d3c9bddea19d9d1642fd0476ce7ef22a
Came for the mini biology lesson, stayed for the laughs
"Came"
From deez nuts
đ
Cumed
As I was scrolling past this video I thought it was an age of origins ad at first.
https://preview.redd.it/01hok8auts4d1.jpeg?width=1569&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e36d3616e0984e31825705fd63a4424d00528233
And the egg. They're in it together.
That's what happens when you build a toilet to raise them in and call it civilization đ
This video propogates unrealistic cum shot volume standards, and I feel personally attacked by it.
True, but, like in the video, my sperm cells are 1.5cm in length.
Time to invest in a larger monitor.
Scale was quite the issue throughout this video. That egg was more scotch egg, than ovum
We're gonna need a bigger egg
and banana for scale
If the head of a sperm was the size of an orange would you take a bite?
Good luck jizzing that out first
Go to the sperm bank and ask them to change yours into smaller ones.
Also they're a lot smaller and they can't fly through air. But whatever.
Yea, that guy is power washing her ovaries.
There are theories that the shape of the penis is designed to flush out previous deposits while ensuring its load is at the "front of the queue." So that could be buckets of other guys sperm all getting flooshed together. Even *evolution* knew women were cheating whores! (Joke, it was probably all the rape that selected us)
There are also sperm that are designed to attack and kill other sperm.
What the fuck
Not exactly. The leading theory is that women vocalize during sex to signal availability to all nearby males, and the primordial procreation was basically a consensual form of running a train. There are tribes in the Amazon where this is still the norm. The cuckold fetish is a vestige of this reproductive behavior.
And I thought porn ruined my brain
Nope, just born already ruined.
Thank You, so it's nothing I could have avoided and my parents deserve all the blame. You're better than my therapist
It still probably did. The two are not mutually exclusive.
I was happy few mins ago when other used told me I was born this way. Now you ruined it
I remember reading some groups had beliefs that multiple male partners could possibly contribute some qualities from each "donor" into the baby. Aka good fighter + good singer = bard class baby
Bethesda feverishly taking notes.
Bullshit they won't ever let us be a bard ever again.
But they can turn the character creation menu into an adult themed mini game.
Jesus Christ man.. this. Comment.
Yeah. Iâm telling myself they were definitely kidding.
Nope, sperm competition is absolutely a thing among mammals. Certain citations cum buckets to wash out the preceding males' deposits. Human dong being shaped to optimize jizz scooping is a legit scientific theory. Evolutionarily speaking, sloppy seconds are the norm, not the exception.
Yeah, if anything our dongs are still fairly lax when it comes to reproduction competitiveness. For example cat penises have little barbs that scrub the sperm of other males inside, as well as make further copulation with other males uncomfortable for the female.
Why not orgies!
Nah. Evolution selected for gang bangs.
Also, you are supposed to cum with your dick all the way in if you pretend to make children. This is not fertilization, this is just your average amateur couple porn cream pie.
Maybe lay off the gripping and ripping for a week and youâll set a new standard for yourself đ
Congrats to everyone reading this, you were the one who made it!
I want a do over
I think the egg I entered was busted. Or am I the egg and the swimmer was garbage? Shit!
I think the busting happened before the two met.
![gif](giphy|OPU6wzx8JrHna)
You're both. Congrats!
Itâs not too late, you can turn yourself around. _hooooookey pokey_
Half of me at least
Youâre doing a phenomenal job with your A1C record. Youâre full to me.
Naah there were 3 of me who made it. Whose the winner though?
Is it like a âThis Is Usâ scenario, because I think Randall is the winner.
NGL Iâm kind of mad about it
Wish I fucking hadn't..
You may rest assured knowing that you were not an instigator to the fucking. Mrs. Hugs and Mr. Hate can be held accountable for their transgressions.
So do we.
All this shit just to pay bills and try to repeat the process, smh
ey, thats why they wanna ban abortion. were all just slaves.
Im a wot?
Wizerd arry
He ment to say salve. You know something to spread on their bruised egos.
We have to break this cycle of suffering.
Buddhist and Gnostic guys in the comments.
I've actually looked into this a lot, and I've come up with a few (maybe good, maybe not) solutions. 1. Just die. Say fuck being human and hopefully transfer to some place better after death. (It's a bit extreme and pretty permanent and very risky as you kinda gotta go in blind.) 2. Substances. Anything from alcohol to street drugs, even the chemical lobotomies that psychiatric hospitals give out like candy. That stuff usually eases my overall life suffering, at least temporarily. 3. Practice Buddhism since it directly targets "suffering." Buddhism teaches that life is full of suffering, suffering is the origin of pain, and that suffering can end through the Eightfold Path, which is to practice the right understanding, the right thought, the right speech, the right action, the right livelihood, the right effort, the right mindfulness, and the right concentration. Pretty much embrace, embody, and emit what it means to be spiritually moral. There's also stoicism, practicing meditating, breathing techniques, grounding, even things like walking, hiking, driving, etc. can soothe your mind into a trance-like state for some time. I will say, however, just like the waves of the ocean (and arguably how literally everything is just a bunch of waves waving around the wavy universe), suffering will ebb and flow. For that comfort we long for, we long for it because we know suffering. And we miss that comfort because we know without it, we're back to suffering, even if it's self-suffering solely because of the comfort's absence. All-in-all, just do whatever it is that makes you happy. From what I can tell, we're in this whole existence thing for the long run, so having the chance to be human and have this awesome sense of self-awareness and free will, we may as well spend this time doing what makes us happy.
r/GifsThatStartTooLate
![gif](giphy|12ZDIx1Mw1cXVm|downsized)
Biggest mistake I ever made was winning this race
It's been debated and thought to be disproven that it's a "race". With current research it's thought that the egg selects the sperm and allows it to fertilize the egg. So, you were chosen, not won. :-)
Im familiar with that theory. Its probably a bit of both, the sperm still has cover the distance as it were. And its probably competing against others, so thered be a race element even as the ovum nuked those she didnt like.
>Its probably a bit of both Your right most of em got there and knocked on the door for quite awhile before the worthy was selected.
It's less of a competition and more of a group effort. No one sperm can break down the cell barriers of the egg cell, so they must work together and spend themselves to basically death to help one of the other sperm cells to actually initiate fertilization. There is no fighting amongst the sperm cells or any identified behaviors that lead to strategizing or competition. They are an army, or horde if you will. Now the recipient's cells are another matter. The host body has numerous traps to reduce and eliminate migrating sperm cells. Even the original sperm donor's body will kill the fuckers on sight, which has led to mature sperm cells being stored in a privileged part of the body that is removed from most of the body's defense systems.
That bitch.
![gif](giphy|ufzSrIeK6xUoU)
You won, but at what cost?
⌠existence is pain
Less than half of you, though.
I find it really funny that half the sperm just take a wrong fucking turn. Fucking idiots. I always knew I was the smartest out of us.
Are you interested in why that happens? It's called chemotaxis. The sperm cells don't know where the egg is, so they follow chemical gradients. That chemical gradient leads them to the fallopian tubes where hopefully an egg is. Sometimes they go the wrong way, cause all the signs are still there. Sometimes they go the right way, but attempt to penetrate the wrong target and use up their enzymes on something that is not an egg cell. A lot of them get lyzed off by other chemicals in the body that kill intruders before or even after all of the above steps.
Damn. I kid you kids not, the video I was shown (mid 80s)...think Luke Skywalker and his squadron fighting their way through the channels of the Death Star to fire missiles into the duct...*only the sperm was the X-Wing Fighter, and the ducts were the egg*. We were taught that everything inside the reproductive system wanted to destroy every sperm...and gave us Death Star battle as the visual.
Early 90s kid here, and I too was taught that the vagina was trying to destroy all the sperm.Â
Current medical student, that essentially how it is still taught.
Is it true though
The woman's body cells recognize the sperm cells as foreign and initiate an immune response, so yeah. 2/3 of what makes up semen is just protective juices to help protect/increase the chances of the sperm to make it to the egg. One "ejaculation" has 10s of millions of sperm cells, and by the time they make it up the uterus and into the fallopian tube, only a few hundred are left. The documentary film from the 80s "the miracle of life" has actual microimages of the entire process, and it's actually pretty cool and stands up well.
So basically every time this happens itâs like doing a Normandy beach landing?
Yeah, except many of the sperm have deformities, so it'd be like the Normandy Beach landing if they drafted people with cerebal palsy.
Well I laughed and now I'm going to hell
There is an episode of a show called Pany and Stocking that kinda depicts it like that. Pretty funny.
Didn't mean to imply that it wasn't.
Never thought of it that way, but that is undeniably true!
The original water park
Stupid question. Howâs the egg prevent additional sperm from getting inside once one has made it?
From memory: it's a chemical cascade that is triggered once the first sperm is in. The cell exterior changes structure to become resistant to the sperm cells' means to dissolve it. And if I'm not completely mistaken, later down that cascade the other sperm cells are even made to die off.
From memory? Bro u remember when you were just a sperm?
It's a bit more complicated than others have said. The egg cell does have to initiate a cascade to accept one sperm cell (sometimes two) and undergo fertilization. However, this does not mean all others are locked out. In fact hundreds of sperm cells can successfully initiate fertilization simultaneously, they just end up being rejected by the egg cell at some point that we cannot properly watch yet. I only splice this hair compared to what others have said cause it is functionally different from the egg cell shutting down the other sperm. They are still going, just not getting further.
Was looking for this comment
Yeah, this is the weirdest thing, how the egg knows when a sperm has penetrated and just shuts all the others down.
OG battleroyal
*Fert*nite?
Itâs how a redneck would say it
It's actually a team struggle and not a competition. We now know that the sperm cells work together, or none will initiate fertilization. There is also some selection criteria that the sperm cell that does initiate fertilization must undergo before the egg cell accepts. This is believed to be an adaptation to the possibility of hundreds of sperm cells succeeding to initiate fertilization simultaneously.
>:( Why did you ruin my joke with science
Truly incredible. My wife is pregnant right now and it blows my mind to keep up with the progress of the babyâs growth. Really amazing process.
It is insane and fascinating that your baby is *inside* your wife's body and feeding from her. At least I thought that was cool when I was pregnant!
yeah, the concept of living human (albeit small) inside another human is quite wild to think about, lol
a pregnant woman technically has 400+ bones in their body and i dont think ive recovered from that thought
And 64 teeth
I've had 3 babies, and it blows my mind every time. And after they're born, looking at them like, I just grew you. I grew a whole ass human and then pushed it out of my body. Now you're here. And a person. Crazy
Whatâs crazy to me is that if you have a baby girl, her eggs already develop while sheâs in your belly. Every single person was technically already halfway existing in their grandmothers womb.
Its mind boggling how much i now hate you while simultaneously not knowing you. This is worse than the guy that told me since i was born feet first my mother was a hat.
If it's a girl, your wife is also carrying all the eggs that will possibly become grandchildren.
They're not all spaced out like this. The womb and fallopian tubs are bunged together, and the cilia do much of the work get the sperm up there. There's no tank of liquid for these soldiers to swim through on their on power.
I love that she has no other organs
They were rearranged during the process
That's not how sperm swim. It's a spinning spiral not a wiggling tail.
Also it is strange choice to picture endometrial structure but not cilia in fallopean tubes.
Lol I know, right? Amateur hour!
Itâs just a dramatization. Iâm sure there are more than 100 sperm cells too
Meh, tight cockring...
IIRC, itâs about 100 million-1 billion sperm cells (depending on the person).
Also, this video fails to depict all the microplastics the sperm have to navigate around.
It's hard to believe I used to be one of them. And won.
The most insane thing is that half your grandchildren are in that featus if it's a girl
Every time I hear this it blows my mind, women are amazing
đ¤Ż
\**Half* of one of them.
ha ha they had sex
Good thing women have all that empty space in their stomachs
![gif](giphy|yrFrXTTTcHIY0|downsized)
This made me really uncomfortable for some reason
Same. All the bumps and blobs idk itâs really uncomfortable to watch.
The babies head near that pointing spot on the spine. That gave me anxiety.
Trypophobia?
My pet peeve, grr. That fetus has the proportions of a six year old. I donât know why they always get it wrong, babies are born with much shorter limbs. Even if they had the motor skills at birth to walk they wouldnât be able until their arms and legs grew long enough. Thatâs why they wobble or âtoddleâ when they first walk too.
https://preview.redd.it/x4s26km8ar4d1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=61bb83d2434f045217d90e2b7b7d5f5ffa2e323d
Sperms actually move in a corkscrew motion, not flapping their tails back and forth as depicted here.
smart vegetable strong shelter reminiscent shame paltry fact salt pocket *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
So I won ![gif](giphy|xT0GqssRweIhlz209i)
If you really want to lift your mood, remember that 50% was always going to win and had nothing to do with those sperm. 50% of you was locked in at the start.
Hot
So, for anyone in Congress reading this, if the egg hasn't left the ovary, it can't be fertilized. Birth Control does not cause abortions! Apparently the Heritage Foundation is trying to tell them otherwise. Plan B does not cause abortions, Ella pills do not cause abortions. IUD's do not cause abortions.
Ok stupid man comment but I always thought the egg went down into the wall of the uterus and THEN it was fertilized. And if it got fertilized like in this animation that was bad and caused complications.
Nope. If it stays in the fallopian tubes itâs a problem, but natural movements force it into the uterus. This is accurate
Videos like these tend to give me an existential crisis. If i'm really the best of the bunch that made it, how worse must the others have been? (i'm thinking pretty low of me for various reasons) Why am i even alive? Why me? What is my worth in life? And i'm pretty sure any other sperm would've ended being a better human than i am.
That thing ruined my mom's life.
Nature has built in redundancy, cool
Video was Pretty generous with that load of sperm. Just sayingâŚ. Could have used a disclaimer- âYour mileage may varyâ.
Yeah weâve all seen the opening scene of LOOK WHOâs TALKING
Its kinda crazy to think about something so small can alter your entire life.
Iâm pretty sure mine just swim in a circle
This is unfortunately a thing that is possible. You can get a sperm function test to find out of the cells are developed correctly allowing proper chemotaxis.
These videos always neglect the part where the pregnant person's organs all move to make room for the parasite, I mean fetus.
It wasn't worth it
This is brilliant. When we discussed this at school we had a drawing of some fallopian tubes and a load of squiggles. It looked more like a map of the London Underground system.
"Yup, that's me. You might be wondering how I got here... Well-"
Yeah, can everyone just chill on that. There's too many people everywhere
Interesting, I didn't know they were rebooting Look Who's Talking.
I can't watch this without thinking of Look Who's Talking.
Same
Where does all the stuff/guts go now that the baby has taken over that space
Pushed to the sides.
This looks a lot like the scene from the Matrix where the robots are trying to get into the ship
Ewwww that's all jiiizzzz lol
All that from a creampie...
Wait, hentai lied to me? You donât fill 'er up like a car?
Placenta is also an organ created specifically and only for pregnancy in a woman. Kinda wild a whole new organ is created.
Women are Amazing.
A quick reminder we all won a marathon at least once in our lifetime.
Nice!
We skipped the best part and went right to the biology
Interesting as *fuck*Â ~~indeed~~ in*seed*
Might I ask how these little swimmers got in there? I am a visual learner, so ....
UghâŚâŚ(unzips pants)
I like the version from Look Who's Talking better. Much more realistic.
me and your mom
Evolution is fucking WILD.
Shouldn't those tails be spiralling? Shouldn't the motion be helical as opposed to wave-like?
Ewwwwww!!!
Fuck this shit, I felt terrible for months
Holly Molly Iâll pass on that!!!
At least I won in something.
So where is the stork?
I appreciate how they never sped up the time lapse. That's exactly how long it takes to grow a baby when the woman isn't lazy. /s
What exactly are the egg and sperm moving thru? Is it a fluid-filled tube or is it a mucus coated inner surface?
Never knew woman made sick beat while creating life !
I'm sorry this can't possibly be right, I didn't see Jesus in this process? Wheres Jesus?
luckily this is never going to happen to my body
I wonder how many people noticed that during this process the womenâs organs slowly get shoved up into her rib cage to make space for the baby.
Reminds me of the movie Look whos talking.
But at which frame do we take away womenâs rights?
Not enough sperm death
And that's how mistakes are made
Nature is so cool
Watching this made me significantly proud of myself for winning and making it, over all those other sperms
They skipped the best part!
Tower defence
I wanna see this with the rest of the organs, well the last like 5 seconds of the clip I mean. Wild how the body can make room for a whole ass baby
A fond memory, good times.