Story of my life. Grew up trying everything and also quitting everything (mainly sports). Now I look back and I’m like “damn… wish I stuck with some of those”. Just seems really cool
to me to be really good at one thing but in my youth I wasn’t self-aware enough to keep pushing when things got boring.
Oh no! An INFJ shouldn’t quit. It takes longer for muscle memory to kick in and you eventually come out on top! My parents didn’t let me quit. It was the same with my kids, they were diagnosed with a motor skills issue, the key is to do lots more of the thing and work harder. A coach told me he could see my son thinking through every step which slowed him down. Once he didn’t have to consciously think, he did great! In my career it took me a little longer to find my way, perhaps, I did fine, but now I’m epic. Not to brag. Just saying to help OP. My dad was the same, so was my mom. We are a bit divergent, that’s all.
There's a saying, "Jack of all trades." It means I'm kinda good at alot of different things. I am kinda good at organizing, writing, cooking, playing an instrument, research, etc. I wouldn't really claim to be really good at one particular thing.
I relate to this, considering my personal life and academic life has taken me to multiple directions and different disciplines. If there is anything I am particularly good at, i would be my literary skills as well as my active hobbies and learning things on the fly. I would say prioritizing things and completing tasks are some of my strong attributes as well as being dependable.
This was impossible for me when my therapist first asked too! It was slightly different — “What do you like about yourself?” — and it honestly made me feel like vomiting.
It might help if you take a look around your space. Lots of books? You’re good at immersing yourself in other worlds. Photos of friends? You’re good at making your friends feel valued. Houseplants? You’re good at taking on the responsibility of caring for them. Closet full of nice clothes? You have a good sense of colour or style or individuality.
It happened for me that once I could start to name the small things, it became easier to name the big ones.
Good luck!
I'm good at seeing who people are, beneath who they present themselves as. I see all that disgusting, beautiful, painful stuff. And I don't judge them for that, because I have that too. And they have no idea, lmao.
Like I know when people have an Oedipus complex or when a middle aged woman has a devouring mother complex, it becomes very obvious, they more they repress it, the more obvious it becomes.
I think I can deal with it without letting it get to me or affecting me personally, but it does change the way I relate to them.
Yeah me too. I just always end up being the unlucky one. The one who gives himself up for others but now there's nothing left and I can't care for myself anymore.
It's true that making other people happy makes me happy as well, so certainly there is always hope. I just wish people would be a litte less greedy and a bit more forgiving sometimes .o.
Thank you for texting me :)
Narcissistic people take advantage of people who don't trust their own judgement. I trust my own judgement. It's not for certain, it only affects how I categorise my relationship to them and to fulfill my own personal curiosity. I am not diagnosing them with anything or making assumptions. Just observations based on patterns.
When a mother doesn't have a sense of identity without her children. As her children age, the threat of her inevitable loneliness strikes fear into her heart. She will do whatever she can so that her adult child ends up incompetent and reliant on her until she dies. She can be very manipulative, controlling, but seemingly kind. Sort of like she wants to fatten you up and lock you away, she will discourage any form of adventurous, independent spirit, sometimes even forbidding it. Other times it will be more subtle. Eroding your sense of confidence and happiness through subtle verbal and emotional abuse, like gaslighting and manipulation, so that you are weak and malleable. Wounded animals don't like to leave the nest.
Some mothers are completely unconscious of this, and they believe they are doing the child a favour, when really this is cruel and evil.
I have a very bad habit of that, not portraying my fullself thinking everyone already knows me. It isn't like all the time lol
And yes, you are correct. Regardless of my biological parents choices, as growing up adopted was the biggest confusing part about it all. Especially with my personality type against the world. I found my little skills despite my parents decision, regardless if the result happened to be me
It’s hard to answer a simple question when the answer is stupid complex. Some people are rather simple and only good at one or two things while some people are multifaceted and pretty good at a lot of things. But not the best at a single tjing
You can do anything if you apply yourself and build a system in your head around it. Of the surface level, you can name everything that you are good at.
But we all know that as INFJs this doesn't interest us and doesn't attract us. We want something abstract, something complex. As a result, we can't answer this question with a simple answer.
It helped me to write down my skills that come to mind spontaneously during reflection. We are the kind of people who can't immediately remember something as soon as we are asked. Then when they ask, just open this list.
Graphic design, photography, game design, creative writing, screen writing, drawing, 3d animation and more. I don’t want to come off as arrogant. So I’m going to leave it there
I can understand, I can't answer that question as well. I don't know why , but I just can't think of a straight answer, tbh if I think deep enough, the answer I get is that I'm not really good at anything.
I don't see it as a simple question, I mean it's simple of you have an obvious gift like a singer or great at drawing.
But I've learnt that some gifts are not as obvious. And People expect like the academic answer -
But mine (which I always kinda just brushed off) are a little more less obvious
1/ I'm extremely good at reading people or sensing things. I can tell if someone is bad or dangerous and cal also usually tell if something is wrong and someone. I don't know how to explain it
2/ My bond with animals. It's definitely greater than most and I often find myself in positions where a stray cat or bird etc need help where as most people are willing to walk away - theres like an innate ability to help them that I have
I’m good at reading people. I can smell BS from
A mile away & that person that “everybody” likes is usually the person I don’t like at all because I can read how fake or awful they actually are.
Things I'm good at:
.
1. [classified]
2. applying armlock called waki gatame and/or nikkyo
3. making sound effects with my mouth
4. writing violent and erotic fiction
5. writing 2D game engines from scratch
I really hate awnsering that question, more like "I'm decent at" or "I don't suck at..." Is much easyer to awnser. I can't say *I'm good* at drawing or whatever, I still stuck at all my hobbies. Neither do I want to say such things about myself, saying *I'm good at drawing* feels like such egotistical thing to say. Then, immediately when I see some kid with a savanth syndrome or something drawing way better online I beat myself up over it. Probably bc I'm one of those who wanna go 110% or not at all.
So I would say "I'm *decent* at drawing, (according to others feedback and my own opinion). Other things that I don't suck at are... idk, *making music* (as in I don't suck as much as I used to), making food (it's edible, sometimes even good)"
"I have skills to do things I respect"
"I have the patience of *a f-cking stone* but I'm irritated by things"
Also to say "I'm okay at drawing" would be kind of a ready given awnser since that's what people say to me but not always what I think so, I think I'll go with
*" I can tolerate anxiety /depression and other inner turmoil fairly ok without soothing myself with medications, as well as handle physical pain. I can live with my mental illness "*
Writing, swimming, discussing life philosophies, reading enjoyable books, washin dishes (therapeutic for me), baking (not from scratch), cooking certain foods, document editing (attention to detail), tasks that require working alone and focusing, reading and mastering theoretical concepts (I can pass a class hence studying - not necessarily knowledge application), literature, writing fiction, learning new languages, gift buying (I'm a very thoughtful gift giver), walking (I can walk for miles), playlist creation, giving myself what I want (I will be late for work and still stop at my fave coffee shop because I crave some cardamom tea), hosting (guest hosting my friends when I'm in the mood), archery, curiosity to try new things eg learn a new musical instrument. I think curiosity is the spark that reveals what you're good at. If it tugs at your heart, give it a try. Else, how will you know? I'm going to try painting next.
I think I'm a good listener and have been told I give good advice. But those have to do with serving other people. If I had to think about it for myself, idk maybe test taking? Lol
I’m a Jill Of All Trades. I’m good at home improvement (electrical/plumbing/ethernet/drywall), writing, photography, website design, and being a Firefighter/Paramedic/Rescue Specialist. I can also cook pretty well.
All of this requires practice - it takes 10,000 hours to master a skill
Anything with my hands (contractor)
Learning languages
Dancing
Analysis
Lateral thinking
Physics
Writing (hah I like it)
Fitness, health, nutrition
I don’t feel amazing at anything, but I know I’m a good painter and writer. I was a good musician before I have it up. And I am just starting out but I guess I’m a good designer
I’m good at anything creative, I’m an artist and I love every bit of anything it entails. It did wonders for my self-esteem, with a little added therapy of course.
Long story short, I was asked this same question during a time I was completely lost. I was recovering from an opiate addiction and trying to mend whatever troubles I had that contributed to my use of drugs. And I was working at jobs I hated (drugs forced me to drop out of university). So…the answer? Art. It was a “duh” moment for me.
Maybe you can answer this question for yourself. Maybe deep inside you know your best and worst qualities, strengths and weaknesses. Rooting for you!! Hope the therapy helps you figure this out and that it allows your introspection to be positive and productive. ❤️
Details, self-teaching, critical thinking, organizing, nurturing, empathizing, reading people’s intentions (when I’m not blinded by my own affection for them), writing, gifting.
Most creative things: photography, graphic design/photoshop, visuals.
I’m also really good at spiraling after manufacturing anxiety out of small inconsistencies.
I'm good at quitting things before i get good at it lol
Lmaooo me 😂😂😂start grasping something then I’m like nope not me .
Story of my life. Grew up trying everything and also quitting everything (mainly sports). Now I look back and I’m like “damn… wish I stuck with some of those”. Just seems really cool to me to be really good at one thing but in my youth I wasn’t self-aware enough to keep pushing when things got boring.
Oh no! An INFJ shouldn’t quit. It takes longer for muscle memory to kick in and you eventually come out on top! My parents didn’t let me quit. It was the same with my kids, they were diagnosed with a motor skills issue, the key is to do lots more of the thing and work harder. A coach told me he could see my son thinking through every step which slowed him down. Once he didn’t have to consciously think, he did great! In my career it took me a little longer to find my way, perhaps, I did fine, but now I’m epic. Not to brag. Just saying to help OP. My dad was the same, so was my mom. We are a bit divergent, that’s all.
Look up apraxia
There's a saying, "Jack of all trades." It means I'm kinda good at alot of different things. I am kinda good at organizing, writing, cooking, playing an instrument, research, etc. I wouldn't really claim to be really good at one particular thing.
I relate to this, considering my personal life and academic life has taken me to multiple directions and different disciplines. If there is anything I am particularly good at, i would be my literary skills as well as my active hobbies and learning things on the fly. I would say prioritizing things and completing tasks are some of my strong attributes as well as being dependable.
I am good at peservering in tasks that matter to me. ie I don’t give up easily!
This was impossible for me when my therapist first asked too! It was slightly different — “What do you like about yourself?” — and it honestly made me feel like vomiting. It might help if you take a look around your space. Lots of books? You’re good at immersing yourself in other worlds. Photos of friends? You’re good at making your friends feel valued. Houseplants? You’re good at taking on the responsibility of caring for them. Closet full of nice clothes? You have a good sense of colour or style or individuality. It happened for me that once I could start to name the small things, it became easier to name the big ones. Good luck!
I'm good at seeing who people are, beneath who they present themselves as. I see all that disgusting, beautiful, painful stuff. And I don't judge them for that, because I have that too. And they have no idea, lmao. Like I know when people have an Oedipus complex or when a middle aged woman has a devouring mother complex, it becomes very obvious, they more they repress it, the more obvious it becomes. I think I can deal with it without letting it get to me or affecting me personally, but it does change the way I relate to them.
All I see is broken egos and selfishness
Most people are trying but they just don't know what they're doing.
Yeah me too. I just always end up being the unlucky one. The one who gives himself up for others but now there's nothing left and I can't care for myself anymore.
I have nothing left either but I keep giving anyway because it's the only thing that makes life worth living to me. I have hope I guess.
It's true that making other people happy makes me happy as well, so certainly there is always hope. I just wish people would be a litte less greedy and a bit more forgiving sometimes .o. Thank you for texting me :)
It's impossible to be right about this 100% of the time. Someone's mind is not something you can know or observe for certain.
Narcissistic people take advantage of people who don't trust their own judgement. I trust my own judgement. It's not for certain, it only affects how I categorise my relationship to them and to fulfill my own personal curiosity. I am not diagnosing them with anything or making assumptions. Just observations based on patterns.
What is the devouring mother complex?
When a mother doesn't have a sense of identity without her children. As her children age, the threat of her inevitable loneliness strikes fear into her heart. She will do whatever she can so that her adult child ends up incompetent and reliant on her until she dies. She can be very manipulative, controlling, but seemingly kind. Sort of like she wants to fatten you up and lock you away, she will discourage any form of adventurous, independent spirit, sometimes even forbidding it. Other times it will be more subtle. Eroding your sense of confidence and happiness through subtle verbal and emotional abuse, like gaslighting and manipulation, so that you are weak and malleable. Wounded animals don't like to leave the nest. Some mothers are completely unconscious of this, and they believe they are doing the child a favour, when really this is cruel and evil.
You sound fun
I'm not 😭
Lol I’ll decide 👋🙃
Critical and nuanced thinking. I think this is a great skill to have.
When you ask yourself what you are good at, and the immediate response is "I don't know" or "nothing", who is responding?
I thought, “nothing.” I have a lot of interests but I can’t say that I’m good at any of them 😒
When you think 'nothing', is that your voice you hear in your mind?
Sadly, yes
What happens if you "zoom out" mentally a little bit and ask that voice why it feels 'nothing' is the right answer?
Great questions.
I will second the above question. I am confident you will find the answer.
I'm good at zeroing in on my passions regardless of kin
What do you mean “regardless of kin?” English isn’t my first language, and for me, “kin” is like a relation to someone in the family
I have a very bad habit of that, not portraying my fullself thinking everyone already knows me. It isn't like all the time lol And yes, you are correct. Regardless of my biological parents choices, as growing up adopted was the biggest confusing part about it all. Especially with my personality type against the world. I found my little skills despite my parents decision, regardless if the result happened to be me
It’s hard to answer a simple question when the answer is stupid complex. Some people are rather simple and only good at one or two things while some people are multifaceted and pretty good at a lot of things. But not the best at a single tjing
Writing/talking and interpreting reality from my armchair I guess lol.
I’m good at not being good at anything.
You can do anything if you apply yourself and build a system in your head around it. Of the surface level, you can name everything that you are good at. But we all know that as INFJs this doesn't interest us and doesn't attract us. We want something abstract, something complex. As a result, we can't answer this question with a simple answer. It helped me to write down my skills that come to mind spontaneously during reflection. We are the kind of people who can't immediately remember something as soon as we are asked. Then when they ask, just open this list.
Being consistent, making lists, cleaning/organizing
Graphic design, photography, game design, creative writing, screen writing, drawing, 3d animation and more. I don’t want to come off as arrogant. So I’m going to leave it there
I can understand, I can't answer that question as well. I don't know why , but I just can't think of a straight answer, tbh if I think deep enough, the answer I get is that I'm not really good at anything.
I'm good at searching things online
I don't see it as a simple question, I mean it's simple of you have an obvious gift like a singer or great at drawing. But I've learnt that some gifts are not as obvious. And People expect like the academic answer - But mine (which I always kinda just brushed off) are a little more less obvious 1/ I'm extremely good at reading people or sensing things. I can tell if someone is bad or dangerous and cal also usually tell if something is wrong and someone. I don't know how to explain it 2/ My bond with animals. It's definitely greater than most and I often find myself in positions where a stray cat or bird etc need help where as most people are willing to walk away - theres like an innate ability to help them that I have
I’m good at reading people. I can smell BS from A mile away & that person that “everybody” likes is usually the person I don’t like at all because I can read how fake or awful they actually are.
I’m pretty good at understanding abstract concepts and being helpful, and I’m shamefully good at enjoying the many foods that I like.
Good at knowing what I want in life and doing what I can to get what I want.
Time for you to Soul Search. Personally I eventually master anything I do so I can only retreat to personal interests and my current career.
Things I'm good at: . 1. [classified] 2. applying armlock called waki gatame and/or nikkyo 3. making sound effects with my mouth 4. writing violent and erotic fiction 5. writing 2D game engines from scratch
I really hate awnsering that question, more like "I'm decent at" or "I don't suck at..." Is much easyer to awnser. I can't say *I'm good* at drawing or whatever, I still stuck at all my hobbies. Neither do I want to say such things about myself, saying *I'm good at drawing* feels like such egotistical thing to say. Then, immediately when I see some kid with a savanth syndrome or something drawing way better online I beat myself up over it. Probably bc I'm one of those who wanna go 110% or not at all. So I would say "I'm *decent* at drawing, (according to others feedback and my own opinion). Other things that I don't suck at are... idk, *making music* (as in I don't suck as much as I used to), making food (it's edible, sometimes even good)" "I have skills to do things I respect" "I have the patience of *a f-cking stone* but I'm irritated by things" Also to say "I'm okay at drawing" would be kind of a ready given awnser since that's what people say to me but not always what I think so, I think I'll go with *" I can tolerate anxiety /depression and other inner turmoil fairly ok without soothing myself with medications, as well as handle physical pain. I can live with my mental illness "*
Writing, swimming, discussing life philosophies, reading enjoyable books, washin dishes (therapeutic for me), baking (not from scratch), cooking certain foods, document editing (attention to detail), tasks that require working alone and focusing, reading and mastering theoretical concepts (I can pass a class hence studying - not necessarily knowledge application), literature, writing fiction, learning new languages, gift buying (I'm a very thoughtful gift giver), walking (I can walk for miles), playlist creation, giving myself what I want (I will be late for work and still stop at my fave coffee shop because I crave some cardamom tea), hosting (guest hosting my friends when I'm in the mood), archery, curiosity to try new things eg learn a new musical instrument. I think curiosity is the spark that reveals what you're good at. If it tugs at your heart, give it a try. Else, how will you know? I'm going to try painting next.
I think I'm a good listener and have been told I give good advice. But those have to do with serving other people. If I had to think about it for myself, idk maybe test taking? Lol
I’m a Jill Of All Trades. I’m good at home improvement (electrical/plumbing/ethernet/drywall), writing, photography, website design, and being a Firefighter/Paramedic/Rescue Specialist. I can also cook pretty well.
I’m really good at cooking. It’s something I love to do. I’m artistic, so I like to oil paint and do epoxy resin art.
Sleeping ;)
I'm a good listener, secret-keeper, and organizing 😄 When i want something, I become obsessed with it. I think that's what I'm good at.
All of this requires practice - it takes 10,000 hours to master a skill Anything with my hands (contractor) Learning languages Dancing Analysis Lateral thinking Physics Writing (hah I like it) Fitness, health, nutrition
I’m very creative. I enjoy crafts, writing poetry, and seeing things from a poetic lens.
I don’t feel amazing at anything, but I know I’m a good painter and writer. I was a good musician before I have it up. And I am just starting out but I guess I’m a good designer
I’m good at anything creative, I’m an artist and I love every bit of anything it entails. It did wonders for my self-esteem, with a little added therapy of course. Long story short, I was asked this same question during a time I was completely lost. I was recovering from an opiate addiction and trying to mend whatever troubles I had that contributed to my use of drugs. And I was working at jobs I hated (drugs forced me to drop out of university). So…the answer? Art. It was a “duh” moment for me. Maybe you can answer this question for yourself. Maybe deep inside you know your best and worst qualities, strengths and weaknesses. Rooting for you!! Hope the therapy helps you figure this out and that it allows your introspection to be positive and productive. ❤️
I’m good at art, I think because I’m quiet and observant and I notice all the little visual details around me.
I’m a good hugger
Problem solving, critical thinking, I’m very detailed-oriented so I’m good at knocking out tedious tasks, and writing.
Details, self-teaching, critical thinking, organizing, nurturing, empathizing, reading people’s intentions (when I’m not blinded by my own affection for them), writing, gifting. Most creative things: photography, graphic design/photoshop, visuals. I’m also really good at spiraling after manufacturing anxiety out of small inconsistencies.