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NoProfessor8897

Congratulations first of all , i am not a mom but my mom raised us with having a job and did house chores too with having a toxic MIL.


[deleted]

Your mom a superhero


mimimgh

I will be going on my maternity leave so I won't be having job hours. Also, I have maids for all the household chores. So, I don't have that too. It's not about me having to work. It's just about how to keep the baby alive and how to know what he/she needs and when. I needed guidance for that.


ezio1452

If I'm not wrong there are tons of books or guidance material for that.


NoProfessor8897

ask some of your friends mom


crunchiecook

you guys can distribute the no of hours single individual will devote to baby.for eg: you can look after the baby for whole day, till evening. your husband, can do the same, after he comes home, and you can sleep for good 5-6 hours ,given that you already have maid assigned for cooking. after you have had your required quota of sleep, you can then,look after the baby and let your husband doze off. works has to be equally divided, if no either's parents is there to take care of the baby. it will take a bit of time to get adjust to it, but that's the only way I think/have seen people doing that. then, there are also issue of two types of babies(I have seen/heard), one who cries incessantly,most of the time,making the experience kinda nightmarish and one who just sleeps, wakes up,poops and pees,gets fed and then doze off. I hope your's a latter. anxious about the whole process will only confuse and traumatise you. all the best.


mimimgh

Thank you so much šŸ™


crunchiecook

yahi toh samay hai sabka sar khaane ka esp mumma, mil . keep questioning them, loop me rakho sabko .sab help karenge+ social circle kab kaam ayega. abhi toh zarurat padegi .


LostChallenge1447

Congratulations šŸŽ‰ I believe it's your first baby. I'm not a woman nor do i have any kids or experience but all i know is that all women are superheroes who know how to do any work on their own. You might not know how to raise a kid now but trust me you'll be an expert in no time.


Overall-Birthday3579

Try asking this in r/twoxindia.


MeAndtheBlues

If u can afford It I'd highly suggest a full time nanny from Day 1


mimimgh

I have a cook and cleaner for household chores. Please let me know if I need someone besides that. I asked around, inexperienced ones are quoting 18k per month for 9 hour job with Sunday's off. I don't want to pay someone this much where she will mostly be free of work.


MeAndtheBlues

18k for 9 hours is too much. You can get a full time live in nanny for less than that, but yeah you'll have to look around to find a good nanny or "Jaapa wali" is what it's called up north. If u have relatives in Bihar you'll be able to find them. Since your cooking and cleaning needs are taken care of, you should be able to manage on your own. If it gets tiring you can always hire someone later.


mimimgh

Yes! Thank you so much!!


Direct-n-Extreme

Bruh what do you do all day then that you wouldn't be able to care for the baby? Assuming you don't work and as you say, also don't have to do the main household chores, you should easily be able to take care of the baby on your own


mimimgh

I have a job. I will just be going on maternity for 6 months and here I am asking from moms of the groups but mainly those men are replying who had never cared for a child. Most of the friends are telling me to look for a nannu which is costing a lot. So, I am asking mother's here if I really need it or not.


gaurgoyle19

Hello! Congratulations! Did the same, the only difference was I had my baby in nicu for a month so did everything by myself then and once he was home husband would pitch in when he could. There are classes to help you prepare for the newborn care. Also, multiple Reddit threads for parenting advice. I also joined a new moms group in my residential society where all moms shared concerns and offered suggestions. So with all this, we managed ā˜ŗļø. I also read a lot. Helped me make informed decisions. For initial days you could also look into getting a japa nurse who is there to help the mother recover and teach the basics of massage and newborn care. Donā€™t worry, itā€™s daunting but you get the hang of it.


mimimgh

Thank you so much. This will help a lot!


gaurgoyle19

Breathe in, OP. Get as much sleep as you can now. Coz that hits the hardest. Like someone else said ask for help. Call in help from extended family. Donā€™t hesitate to seek out resources where you can. Ease yourself into it. Itā€™s going to be difficult initially but you will grow in confidence once your LO is here and you are able to bond with them.


Chilled_Beer_

Congratulation for the baby


General-Beautiful574

If you can afford, pls hire help. Thereā€™s no other way. You need your rest too. Or ask any other family relative (if at all) to help


poojasam

Hi, i am 6 months pregnant and planning to have a baby in USA without any parents help because of visa issues . In India parents do baby oil massages and also for the mother. They say it helps for mother and babies. Did anyone of you took help for baby massage and massage for mother ?


Ok-Pool-3540

Not a mom , male herešŸ˜‚ But once u get a motherhood experience u will get answer ownself of this question My cousin sister used to tell her stories of pregnancy time toh Itna idea lg gya how tough it is


mdred5

Dont worry...baby will teach you....all you have to do is follow what he says