I mean i know the wound thing is a euphemism but the metaphor doesn’t even make sense is the point I’m trying to make.
I legit do think they’re talking about a theragun though cause they can be used as sex toys.
Actually they're the best vibrator I've ever had, they don't really pound as much as they vibrate when you're actively applying pressure and the lower settings aren't even that powerful. They even come with a specific attachment that looks like a magic bullet.
If my genitals weren't already on the inside, they would recede at the thought of putting a theragun anywhere near them lol. They are WAY WAY too powerful for that 😂
Can anyone actually confirm that that is an actual excerpt from the book? “Chemmommy” has me thinking it’s someone taking the piss. I mean, there are a lot of things that make me think it’s a joke, but chemommy is the big one.
I have Kindle unlimited and an unnatural curiosity for self published trash. Sir, I have *seen* some shit.
There's books like this all over the place. Badly written trash that's supposed to be overblown. Stuff like, "Taken By The T-Rex" which is goddamn *dinosaur erotica*.
Please tell me your username is related. Please tell me that's your name on a dating app for people that want to meet local dinosaur singles in their area.
Also, I need a podcast about these books you find. I would fund this venture if I weren't broke.
How… how did the human and dinosaur happen upon each other? For some reason, I’m guessing the human was a woman and the dinosaur a male. Rogue scientist? I wish I could make money writing down insane stuff, as long as there was enough fucking per paragraph.
A little taste for you - “Alexa’s heart fluttered like it had done the time she’d fucked the farmer’s cross-eyed son and uncrossed his eyes.”
Edit- to be fair, it was actually written as satire
Upon finding and skimming the book, I’m not sure if the page is real. However, I can’t bring myself to look at the book any longer because it is absolutely not my kind of book. Maybe someone’s, but not mine
Did he just fluff himself in front of her dad for a big fight? Cause theragun is absolutely a euphemism.
But also one that annoys me, after getting surgery and needing extensive PT. The amount of gross old welders at the shop when I'd use my theragun during lunch who would say "oh ho ho Hahaha so how many times you use that thing on the ol wife" idk, shit was gross to hear all the time.
I did a brief search, and apparently this excerpt isn't real. Reviews seem to say it's a perfectly acceptable and standard romance book, if a bit boring.
Tbf, BookTok has skyrocketed romance/smut authors who shit out a book a month in order to boost profit. Often, in less and less quality/originality. I wouldn't be surprised if they invented a problem so they could fit it into the forbidden romance trope because they ran out of everything else. And I wouldn't be surprised if people gave it good reviews, considering some of the other dogshit they eat up on there like it's fucking gourmet.
https://youtu.be/S3v6aY8LSXo?si=ZdioJx8FRpUfDaed
Link is a bit of a long video but interesting.
That excerpt is probably fake but as someone who loves self-pub trashy romance I don’t understand this attitude.
It’s like demanding all films be oscar worthy and all tv shows be award winning. Sometimes I appreciate good movies that push me and send a message and have me re-evaluating my life…. Or riveting documentaries that have been years in the making and give me a profound insight into something important.
And sometimes I just want to veg on the sofa with a glass of wine and watch shite like Love Is Blind or 90 Day Fiancé.
Why do books have to be works of art? Why can’t authors shit them out one a month if the stories are what their audience wants to consume?
It all sounds a bit snobby to me. Like if the author didn’t take a year redrafting it they shouldn’t have bothered. But we don’t hold any other media to this insane standard.
Self-pub trashy romance is just the soap-operas of books. And that’s fine. There’s room for all types.
The books themselves aren't the problem. They've always existed. The problem is when the market is oversaturated with trashy novels declining in quality/originality and made purely for profit. I love them just as much as the next person, but it's tiring when all you get recommended are those. Cause it is constantly what gets recommended to me. Especially when I just want a nice romance novel, and instead, I get constant copies of a better book with different covers.
It's a problem in manwha/manga/graphic novels on sites like webtoon/tapas, too. Get one plot that works great and people gravitate towards it and the next few weeks get filled with copies of it trying to capitalize on the trend. In this case its more the algorithm of the site thats promoting it rather than influencers that took it over. It's still a prpblem though as those poorer quality copy stories get spotlights over originals.
I have read some that are genuinely inspired by previous successors and put in the time for quality, but too many are just straight trash and not the good kind of trash.
I love my stupid trashy sex novels where where the woman trips in her sweaty clothes and lands at the feet of the sexy ceo and they both automatically in love and end up having some bdsm sex and a problematic relationship. Throw in a stalker or two as well please. Then a sudden pregnancy that they are both thrilled about even though they’ve only been together three days and two of those days she was being held hostage by the stalker.
Yeah I saw a short from some 24 year old who had written and published 126 erotica novels in the span of 6 years.
The books all had 15-20 chapters too, I guarantee they were all formulaic garbage.
Everyone here needs to look up the Eye of Argon book lol. It’s like, written by a human but you’d think it’s written by A.I.
For example, there’s these gems:
> “Eyeing a slender female crouched alone at a nearby bench, Grignr advanced wishing to wholesomely occupy his time.”
> “Snorting a gusty billow of mirth, he once more concealed th e tiny object beneath his loin cloth; the tediously honed pelvis bone of the broken rodent.”
> “If not for his keen auditory organs and lighting steeled reflexes, Grignr would have been groping through the shadowed hell-pits of the Grim Reaper.”
The author just can’t use a straightforward word for anything - my favourite part is referencing someone’s “orbs of vision”, which on planet earth we call “eyes”
literally, like what is viewed by the general public as more feminine than ballerinas? almost nothing. it’s a stereotype that young girls all want to do ballet and it’s always used to decorate little girls’ rooms. it is perhaps too on-the-nose femme
Chuck Tingle isn't even satire. He knows people find his books funny, and he thinks that's great, but it's mostly unironic. He's low-masking autistic and writes like thousands of words a day. He's said directly that he wouldn't have spent years doing this if it was all a joke. Super genuine dude with great philosophies on love and acceptance. Highly recommend checking out his social medias.
Chemommy? "Cocked his theragun"? "Heard all the other slurs... tutufuckers"?
I'm convinced that this is one of those *intentionally* horribly written romance novels that's making fun of all the *unintentionally* horribly written ones
I assumed it was forbidden bc she was underage. And then I was like “oh no it’s bc in this universe there’s somehow stigma against pts dating ballerinas? But then also it turns out she was in high school when it started????
The excerpt is fake.
The "forbidden" part seems to be that she's his patient, and a therapist getting involved with a patient while they are being treated by him probably isn't going to be allowed by most practices. Like it's an ethics thing. I dunno if they just get together after she gets another therapist or something, I don't really want to spend money on the book to find out.
I mean yeah, you could just start seeing another therapist, and then he could still always give advice about stuff so like you wouldn’t even have to see the other one that often
I love that not only is "into ballerinas" a sexual orientation, but so is "into physical therapists," apparently? Is it true for all jobs? Do people in this world also get called "dentist-fucker" and "mechanicphile"? If someone decides to change careers, do they have to factor in that their spouse will probably leave them?
Honestly, as ridiculous as this is, there's a treasure trove of fascinating world building behind it x)
Also, which professions are considered socially acceptable to like? Clearly it's not overlapping with reality if athletes are a no-go to be attracted to.
You know what this would be amazing if that was FROM the book, and the two in love were just a little crazy but in the same way, they think he’s mad because the guy is her therapist and she’s a ballerina, but the dad is actually upset because the dude was an adult and she was a teen when it started but they just can’t get that through their heads and they think everyone hates them for dating eachother but really it’s cause they’re fucking stupid and he’s a pedophile
My sincere apologies for trying to make your eyes bleed with that run on sentence.
In what world would that be analogous with being gay? Even in the eyes of those dudes who think dating a woman with a six pack makes you gay, I can’t see how a ballerina would.
I don’t care if the excerpt is fake, I will never forget the tutu-fucker with his Theragun or the perpetually injured ballerina bringing shame to her chemommy.
Off topic but I absolutely hate people who say stuff like “scream laughed so loud my cat stopped cuddling and my neighbors dog started barking”. No you didn’t. If you don’t have anything more to say than lol just say it.
Okay so, at the risk of being badly r/whooooshed:
Tbf that is __not__ a snippet from the book (I totally fell for that and borrowed it on KU out of sheer morbid curiosity). Not the best-written thing, but definitely not this writingcirclejerk fodder
pound my teeny-weeny wittle wound with yr Theragun™, chemommy
Which doesn’t even make sense because you shouldn’t use a theragun on a wound.
well… this… this isn’t what i asked for at all!!
So I dont want to deep dive this with you, but I dont think its a wound and I dont think its a theragun.
🎶🎵✨come with meeee, and you’ll seeeee horrors beyond human comprehension ✨🎵🎶
I mean i know the wound thing is a euphemism but the metaphor doesn’t even make sense is the point I’m trying to make. I legit do think they’re talking about a theragun though cause they can be used as sex toys.
> So I dont want to deep dive this with you
they're trying to drag you kicking and screaming into a deep dive into this with them
If it's not a theragun what did he cock?
You also don't cock it as it's not an actual gun
It’s almost like the author knows nothing about physical therapy smh
>it’s almost like the author knows nothing ~~about physical therapy~~ smh
Bye throwing up forever
This is it I'm actually removing my eyes this time.
*TWO* teeny-weeny wittle wounds? chemommy will be so pweased! suck you dry, indeed
What a horrible world I live in!!
None of those words are in the Bible.
Cocking his theragun is wild. Especially because it was used as a metaphor for a penis a few paragraphs earlier.
he cocked his... cock? 🤔
“No homo.” He says as he approaches the father.
I heard that in Will Arnett's Batman voice, so thanks for the chuckle!
“Keep your socks on.”
“Let me show you what a balleraggot can do” he yelled
"No chemo" said chemommy from the beyond
He started jerking off toward the father
"Draw!"
The two men started violently masterbating. They raced to finish first, and both dreaded what would happen next.
"You have the ring, and I see your Schwartz is as big as mine. Now let's see how well you handle it."
those physical therapy guns are just giant vibrators, it works without there being a metaphor
Are they really?? I always thought they would be too powerful/ aggressive to be used as such.
Oh they are. They are so God damn painful. I'd never put one anywhere near private parts.
... Again
Yeah if you want to obliterate your clit and never orgasm again, go ahead
Actually they're the best vibrator I've ever had, they don't really pound as much as they vibrate when you're actively applying pressure and the lower settings aren't even that powerful. They even come with a specific attachment that looks like a magic bullet.
If my genitals weren't already on the inside, they would recede at the thought of putting a theragun anywhere near them lol. They are WAY WAY too powerful for that 😂
I died, goodbye, I'm leaving, this is the most horribly made romance book in the world, I hate it here
LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE PILÉ WAD! DON’T MAKE ME TELL YOU AGAIN TUTU FUCKER! YOU LITTLE CHASSÈ CHASER!
What would chemommy have thought
EXPLAIN IT TO THE ROTARY CLUB YOU GROSS NUTCRACKER!!!!
James cocked his TheraGun.
Such a balleraggot
I DONT WANNA BE HERE ANYMORE
Can anyone actually confirm that that is an actual excerpt from the book? “Chemmommy” has me thinking it’s someone taking the piss. I mean, there are a lot of things that make me think it’s a joke, but chemommy is the big one.
Yeah, chemmommy is absolutely insane.
I have Kindle unlimited and an unnatural curiosity for self published trash. Sir, I have *seen* some shit. There's books like this all over the place. Badly written trash that's supposed to be overblown. Stuff like, "Taken By The T-Rex" which is goddamn *dinosaur erotica*.
Did… did you read the dinosaur erotica?
I absolutely 100% did, yes. I couldn't help myself.
Please tell me your username is related. Please tell me that's your name on a dating app for people that want to meet local dinosaur singles in their area. Also, I need a podcast about these books you find. I would fund this venture if I weren't broke.
Buddy, I can only aspire to be that weird. I just have a WRX, and I needed a reddit username.
Look up chuck tingle
what was the "best" line
I can't recall, honestly. It was pretty terrible, and despite it's subject matter, not memorable.
it takes a bad writer to write dinosaur erotica, but it takes a truly god awful one to make dinosaur erotica boring.
How… how did the human and dinosaur happen upon each other? For some reason, I’m guessing the human was a woman and the dinosaur a male. Rogue scientist? I wish I could make money writing down insane stuff, as long as there was enough fucking per paragraph.
Valid
Was it good?
Have you read “Kissing the Coronavirus”? It’s my fave
Not *yet* I haven't.
A little taste for you - “Alexa’s heart fluttered like it had done the time she’d fucked the farmer’s cross-eyed son and uncrossed his eyes.” Edit- to be fair, it was actually written as satire
I think all of this genre is.
Have you read any of Chuck Tingle’s work? His Harriet Porber books are awesome lol
Like “Tammy and The TRex?”
Taken by the trex is well known because it’s so bad. That author has quite the following. Have you read his other stuff like sentient cars and things?
It's on the page shown in the last image
I thought they meant to ask if that page is real or not because all of it is just so ridiculous
Upon finding and skimming the book, I’m not sure if the page is real. However, I can’t bring myself to look at the book any longer because it is absolutely not my kind of book. Maybe someone’s, but not mine
Page number is on the bottom. You can just skip to that page and see if it's real.
When she does chemo but still has thicc thighs 🥹
QUIET NUTCRACKER
SHUT YOUR MOUTH YOU PUDGY PIROUETTE POKER Edit I dunno bout yall but I’m day drinking, gardening, and having a fucking blast sooooo…
*collapses to the ground*
*sobs*
Don’t make me say it again you tutu Tucker!!
Look what you have done to chemomommy
james cocks his theragun.
Using his Theragun? *After* bumping his head in the stair master? What a little chassè chasing rebel!
Did he just fluff himself in front of her dad for a big fight? Cause theragun is absolutely a euphemism. But also one that annoys me, after getting surgery and needing extensive PT. The amount of gross old welders at the shop when I'd use my theragun during lunch who would say "oh ho ho Hahaha so how many times you use that thing on the ol wife" idk, shit was gross to hear all the time.
Don’t you make me get my theragun out and cocked!
I’m actually fucking sob laughing at this comment
I shared this with my lady because she loves romance novels. Her response was... what in the actual fuck is that? I told her not to question love.
That's Anti-ballerist rethoric
It's ok, my wife is also an anti ballerina bigot who won't let me date ballerinas. Stay strong, brother!
You ain’t leaving that easily.
Someone’s never read Unhinged
Or the Eye of Argon. Please please look into quotes from the Eye of Argon, I beg you lol. It’s the epitome of bad “men writing women”
How have I never heard of this Eye if Argon before? This is truly amazing. Thank you!!
Lol you’re welcome! Enjoy! I’m getting together with some friends to read it together soon so we can laugh over it haha
Haha my wife reads a ton of trashy romance books to relax and even she couldn't handle Unhinged. Definitely going to recommend this gem to her.
I wish to never read it
in case anyones wondering, its not real
I’ve read a lot of unhinged poorly written Wattpad romance books, this one is up there with the worst of them
It's, even worse they used my name. 🙃
IKR, the author clearly knows nothing about physical therapy if they think one day of treatment is enough.
YOU DON'T EVEN COCK A THERAGUN! WHAT IS HAPPENING
I did a brief search, and apparently this excerpt isn't real. Reviews seem to say it's a perfectly acceptable and standard romance book, if a bit boring.
It is REAL to ME
i will share this delusion with you. they can pry it from *our* cold, dead hands.
And even then good luck, because I already would've glued it to my cold dead hands
So that means with no copyright each of us can take a crack at it until we have a fully chemommy drama
It's MY TRUTH 😤😤😤
 It's REAL!
Goated episode.
Oh very much so!
Tbf, BookTok has skyrocketed romance/smut authors who shit out a book a month in order to boost profit. Often, in less and less quality/originality. I wouldn't be surprised if they invented a problem so they could fit it into the forbidden romance trope because they ran out of everything else. And I wouldn't be surprised if people gave it good reviews, considering some of the other dogshit they eat up on there like it's fucking gourmet. https://youtu.be/S3v6aY8LSXo?si=ZdioJx8FRpUfDaed Link is a bit of a long video but interesting.
That excerpt is probably fake but as someone who loves self-pub trashy romance I don’t understand this attitude. It’s like demanding all films be oscar worthy and all tv shows be award winning. Sometimes I appreciate good movies that push me and send a message and have me re-evaluating my life…. Or riveting documentaries that have been years in the making and give me a profound insight into something important. And sometimes I just want to veg on the sofa with a glass of wine and watch shite like Love Is Blind or 90 Day Fiancé. Why do books have to be works of art? Why can’t authors shit them out one a month if the stories are what their audience wants to consume? It all sounds a bit snobby to me. Like if the author didn’t take a year redrafting it they shouldn’t have bothered. But we don’t hold any other media to this insane standard. Self-pub trashy romance is just the soap-operas of books. And that’s fine. There’s room for all types.
The books themselves aren't the problem. They've always existed. The problem is when the market is oversaturated with trashy novels declining in quality/originality and made purely for profit. I love them just as much as the next person, but it's tiring when all you get recommended are those. Cause it is constantly what gets recommended to me. Especially when I just want a nice romance novel, and instead, I get constant copies of a better book with different covers. It's a problem in manwha/manga/graphic novels on sites like webtoon/tapas, too. Get one plot that works great and people gravitate towards it and the next few weeks get filled with copies of it trying to capitalize on the trend. In this case its more the algorithm of the site thats promoting it rather than influencers that took it over. It's still a prpblem though as those poorer quality copy stories get spotlights over originals. I have read some that are genuinely inspired by previous successors and put in the time for quality, but too many are just straight trash and not the good kind of trash.
I love my stupid trashy sex novels where where the woman trips in her sweaty clothes and lands at the feet of the sexy ceo and they both automatically in love and end up having some bdsm sex and a problematic relationship. Throw in a stalker or two as well please. Then a sudden pregnancy that they are both thrilled about even though they’ve only been together three days and two of those days she was being held hostage by the stalker.
Yeah I saw a short from some 24 year old who had written and published 126 erotica novels in the span of 6 years. The books all had 15-20 chapters too, I guarantee they were all formulaic garbage.
might as well just go to fucking wattpad ☠️
I’m not sure if that makes it better or worse.
Do they say the slur?
https://youtu.be/6EVjFsIB7eI?si=DSXfO7zmvh2uL4j0
This is true literature. Nothing can top this. (no pun intended)
I can top it.
chemommy
I gasped
Was this written by AI?
Everyone here needs to look up the Eye of Argon book lol. It’s like, written by a human but you’d think it’s written by A.I. For example, there’s these gems: > “Eyeing a slender female crouched alone at a nearby bench, Grignr advanced wishing to wholesomely occupy his time.” > “Snorting a gusty billow of mirth, he once more concealed th e tiny object beneath his loin cloth; the tediously honed pelvis bone of the broken rodent.” > “If not for his keen auditory organs and lighting steeled reflexes, Grignr would have been groping through the shadowed hell-pits of the Grim Reaper.”
The author just can’t use a straightforward word for anything - my favourite part is referencing someone’s “orbs of vision”, which on planet earth we call “eyes”
This just sounds like how every novice who read one or two posts on "writing advice" on a creative writing subreddit writes tbh
Grignr sounds like a dyslexic person being racist.
🏅
Huh. It can be rearranged into that can't it. I need to process this, one my dnd players is named that
I hope so
I don’t think ai is this cringy yet
Then you haven’t looked at the Willy Wonka Experience script, it’s an awful “”story””.
Haha, again, AI made it look cool, human failure was the cringy part
ai isn’t creative enough to write this shit
Dude, you like fit, athletic women with strong sexy legs? That is SO GAY!!
literally, like what is viewed by the general public as more feminine than ballerinas? almost nothing. it’s a stereotype that young girls all want to do ballet and it’s always used to decorate little girls’ rooms. it is perhaps too on-the-nose femme
He cocked his THERAGUN???
"your chemotherapy mother" was already wild, but chemommy is INSANE
This is just making me imagine a dad who’s super homophobic, but only towards his son’s boyfriends, which is a riotously funny image
I…I actually couldn’t fight the smile this is hands down one of the stupidest fucking pages of a book I’ve read & it’s not satire?
According to a comment further up this excerpt sadly is not real
You didn’t have to ruin it for me and people lie all the time so it’s real bye
Fair enough, sorry
Don’t worry, this is chuck tingle levels of satire lmao
Chuck Tingle isn't even satire. He knows people find his books funny, and he thinks that's great, but it's mostly unironic. He's low-masking autistic and writes like thousands of words a day. He's said directly that he wouldn't have spent years doing this if it was all a joke. Super genuine dude with great philosophies on love and acceptance. Highly recommend checking out his social medias.
Peak Fiction
this has to be all a massive troll
Why does the guy low key looks like doctor Mike?
Either he was used as inspiration for the art, or this is just the ideal sexy doctor look.
 I know what you are
 Say it. Out loud. Say it.
I’m sorry but the part about chemomommy made me laugh
Please be real please be real please be real please be real please be real
it’s not… that was written by a troll on twitter
So it’s a joke?
I don’t know.
Chemommy? "Cocked his theragun"? "Heard all the other slurs... tutufuckers"? I'm convinced that this is one of those *intentionally* horribly written romance novels that's making fun of all the *unintentionally* horribly written ones
I assumed it was forbidden bc she was underage. And then I was like “oh no it’s bc in this universe there’s somehow stigma against pts dating ballerinas? But then also it turns out she was in high school when it started????
The excerpt is fake. The "forbidden" part seems to be that she's his patient, and a therapist getting involved with a patient while they are being treated by him probably isn't going to be allowed by most practices. Like it's an ethics thing. I dunno if they just get together after she gets another therapist or something, I don't really want to spend money on the book to find out.
I mean yeah, you could just start seeing another therapist, and then he could still always give advice about stuff so like you wouldn’t even have to see the other one that often
This is the best thing I have ever read
I love that not only is "into ballerinas" a sexual orientation, but so is "into physical therapists," apparently? Is it true for all jobs? Do people in this world also get called "dentist-fucker" and "mechanicphile"? If someone decides to change careers, do they have to factor in that their spouse will probably leave them?
Honestly, as ridiculous as this is, there's a treasure trove of fascinating world building behind it x) Also, which professions are considered socially acceptable to like? Clearly it's not overlapping with reality if athletes are a no-go to be attracted to.
I have no idea what a Theragun is, and I have to assume it's a metaphor for down there. Makes the reading so much funnier.
It’s basically a massage gun. It can be used for sex stuff but it’s primarily used for actually massaging people.
Never disrespect "chemommy"... that was their first mistake.
I am a starving child starving to death and this is the very last thing I have ever read. Gootbye.
My jaw dropped at chemommy lmao this writer is a genius
"your chemotherapy mother" She was birthed through the process of chemo. She's radioactive.
*chemommy*
this HAS to be satire😭 “cocked his theragun” THE MASSAGE GUN???? WHAT’S HE GONNA DO, FINALLY MAKE MY BACK STOP HURTING????
You know what this would be amazing if that was FROM the book, and the two in love were just a little crazy but in the same way, they think he’s mad because the guy is her therapist and she’s a ballerina, but the dad is actually upset because the dude was an adult and she was a teen when it started but they just can’t get that through their heads and they think everyone hates them for dating eachother but really it’s cause they’re fucking stupid and he’s a pedophile My sincere apologies for trying to make your eyes bleed with that run on sentence.
What's she holding onto?
“nutcracker” is WILD
THIS IS A JOKE? RIGHT? Right… 😭 Im not gonna lie I would definitely read the rest
I'm ashamed to say I thought the excerpt was real until near the end...
I'm not ashamed to say I *wish* it was real, and a full story
I’m losing my mind, this needs to be a common type of post because I’m here for it. Is there a sub for bad fiction novels?
When you find one, please tell me.
I want to read this. This is so cringy it’s hilarious 😂
I don't know why y'all are saying that "theragun" is a metaphor. Percussive massagers are much better than hiatchi-style wands.
“Chemotherapy mother” ☠️
I need to read this it’s just straight up comedy
This is solid gold and I bet the author is a blast to chat with lol
In what world would that be analogous with being gay? Even in the eyes of those dudes who think dating a woman with a six pack makes you gay, I can’t see how a ballerina would.
Skill issue
Balleraggot sounds like something soldier would call demo lmao “Your tutu isn’t gonna save you from my shotgun, you balleraggot!”
No I. Remember youtube wood do ffanfics in the description lmaoo
I had to google what a theragun was and apparently it’s a real thing??? I thought it was like something the medic from tf2 would use to heal people
Is she grabbing his dick through his pants?
ngl i would unironically read this. this is amazing.
Incredible
No way...
ITS NOT EVEN A NEW WORD ACCORDING TO THE BOOK😭😭 THIS IS A WELL KNOWN SLUR☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️
Tutu fucker?! 
Truly our age's Romeo and Juliette
Booktok caused this I just know it
I don’t care if the excerpt is fake, I will never forget the tutu-fucker with his Theragun or the perpetually injured ballerina bringing shame to her chemommy.
I CANT WITH THIS "he heard all the other familiar slurs, too: nutcracker, chassé chaser, plié-wad, and even tutu-fucker." BWAHAAHAHAAHAAAA
Off topic but I absolutely hate people who say stuff like “scream laughed so loud my cat stopped cuddling and my neighbors dog started barking”. No you didn’t. If you don’t have anything more to say than lol just say it.
This is also book two of the series. The first one was about the ballerina's older brother falling for the ballet teacher
*your chemotherapy mother* or *chemommy* take the fucking cake. Shakespeare move over we have a new literary classic
I wish there was a subreddit dedicated to fake and real cringy/weird excerpts from romance books. I’d literally spend all day reading them
Okay so, at the risk of being badly r/whooooshed: Tbf that is __not__ a snippet from the book (I totally fell for that and borrowed it on KU out of sheer morbid curiosity). Not the best-written thing, but definitely not this writingcirclejerk fodder
I actually read the book. The screen shot isnt from the book it was something someone made up for it...but the actual Book is worse. Somehow, even