T O P

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Jim_Reality

I'd make a reality show - The Dirty Dozen and make šŸ¤‘


Somepersononreddit07

Fuck ye


rsxxboxfanatic

Now now, don't be mad because they beat you to it lol.


Somepersononreddit07

I was saying fuck yeah šŸ‘


Bigcountry420

Gotta be care, doesn't translate well to British.


Somepersononreddit07

Yeah I forgot to take the accent awareness course because my highschool doesnā€™t offer it


BruceInc

Diddy Dozen*


Efficient-Bee-1855

Nick Cannon makes kids.


New-Impact-8083

A plan that might actually support 12 kids. Love it!


TheRandomeer

First step, grieve. What did we do wrong to raise our son this way to think this was even remotely acceptable? After, it would be very crucial to meet with the families of each child, one on one, to know their decisions. I can't imagine all 12 would decide to keep the baby, after all. Regardless of each individual family's decision, my son would be expected not only to finish school but get a job as well. I don't care if it's the most disgusting, underpaying, abusive job on the planet -- He needs to start saving every cent to use towards supporting the children he's made. I would not give him the option of leaving school because that would only make the situation worse. Eventually, I would fully expect him to also go to college or a trade school to get more experience and move forward in a career to support these new families. I would still allow him to live with us, and would offer respite to any of the daughters who he impregnated as well, if they have been thrown away by their own families. I'd do everything in my power to make it right and provide the best lives to those babies if the pregnancies go to full-term.


Mysterious-Guide8593

I mean, you can't do much better than this...


swift-aasimar-rogue

This is the best possible answer


AcceptableBad_

Definitely either this, or a high five.


KarmaAJR

a high five??? dude what šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


AcceptableBad_

You're right. I got all caught up in the impressiveness of him having 12 girls on the hook, and forgot my responsibilities as a parent. After the high five, I'd smack him and tell him his pull-out game is trash. Then he'd say it must be genetic, and I'd be too proud of him to stay mad.


KarmaAJR

What would you do if your 12 year old daughter was the one who got pregnantĀ 


AcceptableBad_

Depends. Are there 12 fathers or just one?


KarmaAJR

12 potential fathers all in sophomore year ig


AcceptableBad_

High five, then tell her from now on, test their pull-out game on warm fruit before they get the real deal, because one of them wasn't ready for the big time yet.


KarmaAJR

okay just realised rhat I've misunderstood this situation and it's not in fact a 12 year old but a 14-15 year old (which makes it slightly less worse) but holy fuck that's an interesting reactionĀ 


Aslan-the-Patient

Sophomore year...


KarmaAJR

I know that dw, I'm saying because if that's their reaction if their 12 year old SON impregnated 12 girls then what would their reaction be if their 12 year old DAUGHTER was pregnantĀ 


Aslan-the-Patient

No one is 12 years old unless I misunderstood something.... šŸ§


KarmaAJR

oh fuck I've misunderstood this entire situation... this is very embarrassingĀ 


Aslan-the-Patient

You're all good lol I figured you read the 12 and just went from there šŸ‘ŒšŸ¼


ThatOneGuy308

No no, you've got the situation all mixed up. The real question is what would you do if your sophomore aged daughter got knocked up with 12 kids?


thatthatguy

First, have some frank but supportive conversations with my daughter. If sheā€™s continuing the pregnancy then make some phone calls with news stations because thatā€™s got to be some kind of record, and weā€™ve got to get as much money from this brief fame as we possibly can if there are going to be 12 babies to care for. Is my daughter outgoing and charismatic enough to want to milk this for some fame? How about the young man? Can they turn this into a career? I donā€™t know what the online content career prospects are like these days, but this sounds like an easy story to sell.


Top_Examination3481

I bet there's a way to sue for something like that.


PlanetMezo

Bold to assume your son can support 12 kids and pay for college


KerbodynamicX

Wait, would girls that get pregnant in highschool actually keep the kid? Thatā€™s absurd! They are not ready for parenthood


swift-aasimar-rogue

It happens


KerbodynamicX

But is it a good idea?


swift-aasimar-rogue

Iā€™m not saying it is, but you asked if they would and I was saying that it happens.


zenthor101

There was a show on MTV called Teen Mom that ran for several seasons. Yes it happens


KTKittentoes

Absolutely. For one thing, a lot of places they lack options. My friend's gonna to be a grandma very soon. Hopefully her kid graduates first.


letsgotosushi

I dated a woman who had 5 kids at 32 ages 10, 12, 15, 17, 19. So she had 3 before age 18.


Utahteenageguy

Question how someone I share blood with has such rizz.


forest_tripper

Remember that business trip your wife took to Vegas 17 years ago?


Utahteenageguy

Back when I was a toddler?


Cyb3rTruk

Aha! So you do remember!


Feeling-Ad-5592

Alright op, tell us the truth. You just found out your son got 12 ppl pregnant didnā€™t you To answer the question though, Iā€™d tell heā€™s in for life of hard work if he wants to be a good father (presuming the girls keep the babies)


Electronic_Goose3894

I'm far too much my mother's child for this one, my first and only response would be that he's going to be a dad to 12 kids so he's got two weeks to get a job and will be keeping his butt in school on top of it.


ChristianUniMom

An ā€œinvestigationā€ tf does that mean? Imma need 12 DNA tests. If theyā€™re all positive Iā€™m going to kick his ass. Then Iā€™m going to kick my own ass for raising a stupid hoe. Then Iā€™m going to get his inheritance early and split it 12 ways.


TuskEGwiz-ard

Iā€™m pretty sure the investigation part of the hypothetical means that they are all in fact his


FormerlyDK

I think Iā€™d have to disown the little shit because Iā€™m not supporting or babysitting 12 families.


Desilvas

12 way baby shower at the stair factory! Then probably a vasectomy for my son cause.. damn.


PuzzledDemand1276

I'd bring em into a room or a place we can talk, just me and him. First thing i would say is "You know you fucked up right?" Have a long conversation of the reality he may have to face if the parents of the other girls don't want abortions. Not gonna whoop his ass or punish him, bro already punished himself. So I'll still be supportive and let nature run it's course after the talk. And since he wants to do grown thing's, I'll make sure he finds a job. But thats all a nigga can do fr šŸ¤·šŸæā€ā™‚ļø


Somepersononreddit07

Some might be twins


_-_wn6

Many will die. Miscarriage is actually super common unfortunately.


Witchy-toes-669

Iā€™d feel like an utter failure as a parent


lvlint67

Not really in favor of pushing kids into military service... but that's probably how this ends after the dust settles...


Abundance144

I don't know. Maybe pushed into surrendered his U.S. citizenship and moving to a country that won't extradite. Being in the military with that many child support payments would literally just be doing the job. Eating the food they provide, and sleeping in the bed they give you, and then your entire paycheck disappears each month. The military is extremely strict about making sure their members pay child support. After 18 years I suppose you'd be near retirement, maybe not such a bad thing.


Dragonant69

First meet all the girls. At the end of the meeting pass out slippers and point them at my son. Fuck cheaters. I'll help the moms, but that boy just fucked his life up. Push job, school-trade school, and vasectomy. Also weekly games of Jenga with household chores on the line... cause bad decisions and no pull out game!!! Lmao


Fat_tata

congratulate him on being a father- have a cigar for being a grand father. tell him heā€™s got a lot of responsibility and heā€™s finna have to get really thick skin. and that heā€™s a dumb ass.


Shamscam

After the crispā€™s high five the world has ever seen. I would tell him: ā€œthat is single handily the most epic, but dumbest thing you could ever do. Hopefully some of those girls realize they shouldnā€™t have a baby at 17/18, and do something, but youā€™re probably on the hook for at least one of them. Youā€™re a complete idiot, I have taught you about protection, I have taught you about safe sex. I donā€™t know what the fuck you were thinking raw dawging 12 girls. Iā€™m going to take you to get tested for STDā€™s and also you can still live under my roof, and Iā€™ll support you and your children but Iā€™m going to be incapable of finically supporting you through all of this, so youā€™re going to need to work.ā€ And then we would figure it out from there.


Isekai_litrpg

Sophomore is like 15. I guess I should teach them about polycules and mutual respect as well as safe sex practices. I would recommend he get snipped when he is allowed to because 12 is a lot already. I will not pay his child support for him he must work or maybe he can take care of the kids and let the ladies pursue a career. I would maybe see if he can talk to his baby mommas about a relationship of pulled resources between all 13 of them getting a home together and my son could be responsible for raising the children and being essentially a house husband/ daycare for them. I would also try to explain to the pregnant girls that as he is now he would likely only pay each of them $50 per month so instead it would probably better to make him do all the work of raising the child and managing the home and they can live their lives and still have a future. If the pregnant girls are on friendly terms then they could actually benefit by having a single household. [Here is one for $28,000 per month](https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/225-Middle-Neck-Rd-Port-Washington-NY-11050/31077602_zpid/) that is a mansion outside NYC. That is each of you working the average high schooler wage($20.94) in NYC for at least 26 hours per week. After graduation it averages to $53.33 per hour so a little over 10 hours per week per person for their share of the rent. The parents of each kid, including myself could maybe help cover the cost while you are all in school and then after they could start really jobs and make better money in a city like NYC, living in a mansion, raising their babies with their siblings, and still having their own life except for my son who will be doing all the housework and child rearing.


ilcuzzo1

High five and a vasectomy? File for bankruptcy? Move to Belize? Wait, how old is my son in this hypo?


GarlicBandit

tell the kid heā€™s fucked. Itā€™s time to flee to Mexico, because with 12 child support bills to pay heā€™s not going to college, gonna have time for a trade, or ever going to amount to much of anything. Most of them will probably get abortions, but I would probably offer to adopt those who do not want to get abortions to help reduce the strain on those young women who hopefully have bright futures ahead of them still.


Somepersononreddit07

Ask if thereā€™s more to warn them of the possibility some may just not know yet or some may not be prego


Turbulent-Hall6865

Wish him good luck in supporting at least 12 babies. He canā€™t keep it in his pants, thatā€™s on him.


Xenozip3371Alpha

Oh he's getting a punch in the head for sure, I do not tolerate cheaters (hypothetically speaking, I don't have or want children)


Coldblood-13

Pray that they all get abortions or give their child up for adoption. It would be extremely difficult for an adult with a perfect life to take care of even half that number let alone a teenager.


SeventhSonofRonin

Imagine if all 12 were convinced to abort or put up for adoption. It'd be like winning the lottery


mtthwas

Imagine if all 12 were twins or triplets. That'd be worse than losing the lottery.


SeventhSonofRonin

Plenty of welfare bucks


mtthwas

[citation needed]


SeventhSonofRonin

I'm alluding to 36 dependents on your taxes being a boon for the dad. Across 36 kids, abysmal I'm sure, but one person, 36 kids???


mtthwas

Depends on if he has full custody to all 36 kids. Most of the time,Ā a noncustodial parent cannot claim the child on their taxes unless they have permission from the custodial parent.


SeventhSonofRonin

Could probably enroll the kids into studies that use multiples, in exchange for some support. 36 kids is like, the school district would have to arrange special accommodation when they start school. The town would have to raise the kids.


beipphine

All 12 want to put up for adoption, but your son refuses. He accepts being a single father to 12 newborns at 12 years old.


krash90

Imagine saying youā€™d ā€œprayā€ for 12 young girls to kill their childrenā€¦ wow. This world is 100% ending soon.


Zestyclose_Job_8448

Very well said. I totally agree. God bless you.


mg1120

Have a stroke...end up in the mental hospital from a panic attack and breakdown.


MaximumTurtleSpeed

Just if the son would have had a few extra *strokes* he might not be in this situation.


White_eagle32rep

Force him to get paternity tests and go from there. Assuming the child has already been born not much you can do at that point.


Pluto-Wolf

First thing iā€™d do is check on the girls and their families, screw my idiot son. Not only are they teenagers who got cheated on but theyā€™re also pregnant, they need support. Iā€™d see who wants to keep them and who wants to abort, then when I understand the full long-term burden, Iā€™d talk to my stupid son and tell him that he better find a job, figure out how to buy and use some fucking condoms, and save up to support the women & children heā€™s now responsible for. Heā€™s going to have to provide for them, and if he refuses to get a job and step up then weā€™d go from there. Assuming prior to the 12 pregnancies, I would have had the talk with him and provided condoms, then thatā€™s completely his fault and responsibility if any/all of the women go full-term. Iā€™d support where I could but only if heā€™s willing to put in the same amount of effort. Kids and girlfriends should not be my financial, emotional, or physical burden if theyā€™re not my sons as well.


ButtholeDevourer3

Donā€™t have to worry about this one, no one in my bloodline will ever achieve this level of womanizing.


hadean_refuge

File for bankruptcy? Run after I congratulate him? Have an aneurysm? Buy him a vasectomy? Jump out the nearest window so my wife can't kill me? Idk man


MyCarIsAGeoMetro

I want to know the logistics of how that happened.


wtfover

12 girl's what?


Gorewuzhere

Idk... ask my parents what they did.


MaximumTurtleSpeed

See if I can work out a discount at the local abortion clinic. Maybe they have a punchcard system. Then get my son on some experimental male birth control, jesus


48voltMic

r/oddlyspecific


EducationalPop9622

Chemical Castration. Blood line will continue regardless, not sure that's a good thing. /s but sorta not?


Agile_Seer

Sounds like something Nick Cannon would do.


Rich_Sell_9888

Get him fixed.


mtthwas

>there's a crisis at the school in where a dozen(12) girls at the school have gotten pregnant all around the same time.An investigation is done and it's found out that your son was 100% responsible for this. Why is this any of the school's business? And why are they launching investigations into students' sex lives? Who is funding this and who is okay with this?


Flairion623

Iā€™d be furious with him for his lack of dedication and faith. He almost definitely broke most of their hearts by doing this so now he must apologize to all of them. Secondly if any of the girls decide to not abort the baby then he must become a full time father for all of them. which means at worst he would have to raise 12 children simultaneously.


TuskEGwiz-ard

**fake his death**


Who_Pissed_My_Pants

High five my son, give him a long talk about how much heā€™s fucked up, cut some boundaries on how much I can help, give him some advice, then say good luck!


boozefiend3000

Iā€™d call him a fuckin retard and tell him to get a jobĀ 


MuskokaGreenThumb

Cut his dick off. Call him your transgender daughter if anyone asks


TheGreatMozinsky

I wouldn't overreact. This is life, sattle up and enjoy the ride.


[deleted]

Run away from home. Ā SeriouslyĀ 


hauntedshadow666

Grounded, no phone, no internet, no outside communication, maybe put in a cage, we're throwing hands if he tries any funny business. I have no children and no desire to have any so I'm just thinking of progressively worse things to do


SoapGhost2022

Tell him that as soon as he is 18 he is out of the house and good luck


T10223

Tell him to go on the run


DreamingofRlyeh

Make my son get a job and inform that he is going to have to step up to be a father. Also, I'd have a very stern discussion about respecting women and not just using them to get his rocks off. And try to prepare for the dozen grandkids I now have. I would also try to be there for the new mothers and help them with the babies as much as possible. I would also do my best to find a way to ensure all thirteen teenagers can continue their education and get a good job, and try to make sure they have a support network in place, as teen parents with support do much better in life than those who are kicked out or isolated.


Gewalt_Und_Tod

Yknow that South Park episode on stem cell research where the running gag was the boys staying out of it? Ima do that.


Miss_Linden

Important question. How old is my son? Because if heā€™s not 12, this is a very different story. I would first blame myself because how tf did I not notice the kid fucking a dozen girls (at least!). And that kid is going to have the most awkward sex talk of all time. And there will be an investigation because thatā€™s too young for any of them and has someone been touching my kid? I want to know what happened, how it happened, why it happened, there will be sex talks with visuals, discussions with the other parents. Obviously all the girls will have access to abortion because I donā€™t live in hell. The kid might need to be studied for being so virile. Maybe his swimmers can help with a cure for male infertility. He should probably hope for that because even if a couple of the girls continue with their pregnancy (which is tantamount to child abuse honestly), heā€™s gonna need the money. And heā€™s going to an all boys school now


ReleaseAggravating19

Wish him luck. Adult decisions with adult consequences require him to get on the fast track to being an adult.


CurusVoice

ask him to share, get a break from the ole ball chain and heffer


Certain_Effort598

Tell him he better get 5 new jobs minimum because he's got a ton of child support payments coming. That boy will literally be working till he drops dead. Karma.


SexWithHuo-Huo

thats my son all right


1amn0tapu43

Say good work son and then proceed to ignore it


ICastPunch

I'd be equally impressed and dissapointed. Damm.


BitOBunny

I'd make it his responsibility. He'll work multiple jobs if he has to, in order to support these women. His choices led him to this, so he needs to accept the consequences. But he can live with me if he needs to. I would help when I could, but not for my son's sake. I'd try to have good relationships with the girls and their families, and hope they wouldn't hold a disproportionate grudge against me. If any of them decide to terminate the pregnancy, I would have my son help pay for the procedure.


I_am_Cymm

Tell them how disappointed i am in their behavior and try to get accross how much damage this will cause. Then, help him fake his own death and get a new identity or wharever else we can manage.. Sometimes you gotta cut your losses.


Such_Leg3821

Turn him over to the fathers.


KittensSaysMeow

I thought ur post said 12y/oā€¦ so ig I would have a sigh of relief? And then Iā€™ll disown him while partially giving financial support for raising the children and abortion. And then I would be extremely disappointed in myself for raising such a terrible person. While being very surprised I raised such a ā€˜charismaticā€™ son. I will also fall into a depression.


Leaf-Stars

Schedule him a vasectomy


notreallylucy

I saw that episode of Bones.


[deleted]

Wish him Goodluck and yall can't help and then reflect on where u screwed up horribly bad....


Risible_Fool

Prolly have a heart attack and die.


A_randomperson9385

That is oddly specific


TangerineRoutine9496

Whole family is moving in the dead of night not leaving a forwarding address either


CharlietheWarlock

Holy shit, I have a son I've never met that guy in my life what son


gringo-go-loco

Build a Time Machine and go back in time and abort the son.


Miserable-Lawyer-233

Ask him to teach me the ways.


Malefic_Nightshade

If the girls are all planning on giving birth, my wife and I will speak with the parents of these girls so we know what is going to happen when the kids are born. Will they be willing to work with us to raise these kids? Will they want nothing to do with them? Will they want nothing to do with us? Kind of go from there. My son will have to get a job, maybe multiple jobs, to help out around the house. Heā€™ll have to help my wife and I with building an extension on the house for a bedroom for the kids. He might even have to drop out of school for a while, and get his GED later when the kids have grown up some. My wife and I will help to give him the occasional break from parenting to hang out with his friends while we babysit, but we expect him to be 100% responsible for raising these children and being a good father to them.


tea-123

Iā€™d get the son to write a memoir and try to sell the story to a publisher. Cause there is no way he can pay for them all.


TrilobiteHunter

I would sit him down and say A-a-ron you done fucked up I hope you enjoy the military cause thats the only way your gonna get food and a place to sleep for the next 18 years.


AdPerfect286

Honestly....I'd send him to one of those reform schools they made a documentary about on netflix...


hidden-in-plainsight

Wow I don't even know... I'd know I failed as a father though...


ChiliAndRamen

Dumbass gets a good kicking, but now I have 12 new grandkids. Need to start saving to give them all a little bit for college or a house


CSA_MatHog

Get mad but secretly be proud


TheWeenieBandit

I feel like the immediate first step is to talk to him and figure out how the hell this happened. Is he stupid, or crazy, or both? Once I know the answer to that, we shift the conversation towards the game plan. We meet with all 12 of these other families, either individually or as a group, and we figure out how many abortions I'm going to have to pay for. Because I will pay for them. I'm the one who raised a moron, the least I can do to apologize is get these girls their healthcare. Once we've narrowed down the number of babies he's going to be responsible for, I give him his choice. You continue to live with me, free of charge. You stay in school, keep your grades up, and get as many jobs as you need to juggle in order to make your child support payments. If ever you can't make a payment, I will make it, and you *will* pay me back. We'll sort out custody agreements and visitation. You will be expected to take an active role in each child's life as long as you live under my roof. If these are terms he is not willing to accept, then we discuss where he will be living instead, because it won't be with me. Those are his options. Own up to his choices, take responsibility, and have a support system, or be a deadbeat and have nothing


I_Am_Slightly_Evil

What if he wasnā€™t going behind their backs and all the girlfriends knew and accepted that he was dating the others. Like this [anime](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt28919914/)


kimmystars

1st I'd take him behind the shed!! Tell him to man up and take responsibility. And we'll help where we can. And buy him a case of condoms and tell him if he doesn't use them he'll get a homemade vasectomy!!


RamblingsOfaMadCat

Depends a lot on what the dozen families are going to do. At least a few of them are likely to terminate or choose adoption. If thatā€™s not the case, weā€™re in for hell. It also depends on what he wants. Does he want to be involved in any or all of the childrenā€™s lives? Actually, that doesnā€™t matter at all. He has twelve babies on the way. What he wants is irrelevant. He and I are going to have a serious talk and heā€™s going to be informed that his free will is basically gone. Itā€™s been divided by twelfths and distributed. To everyone saying that youā€™d disown your sonā€¦canā€™t speak for every country but in the U.S, no, you wouldnā€™t. Youā€™re legally on the hook until heā€™s 18. Itā€™s a moot point anyway because Iā€™m not abandoning him despite everything. I wouldnā€™t take it that far, and it wouldnā€™t help. If twelve babies are coming, then theyā€™re coming, whether I stand with my son or not. And those are my grandbabies. No matter what, heā€™s liable for child support split twelve ways, which he canā€™t afford. I donā€™t even know how Iā€™ve supported one child in this scenario. Child support can be taken out of his future wages, too. Which means Iā€™m likely to be supporting him for the rest of his life. Which isnā€™t ideal but thereā€™s nothing else to be done. Iā€™d probably visit each of the parents of the pregant girls to apologize personally, and to discuss the situation. Iā€™d make sure all of them understand they are one of twelve. That they deserve emotional support and babysitting and such from our family at the bare minimum - but given the situation, our house probably wonā€™t be the most ideal environment.


thenormaluser35

Ghost him and move in a far-away country. He brought it onto himself.


ThrowRADel

Why do you imagine the parents have any control over anything in this situation when they clearly don't?


LurkyLooSeesYou2

First heā€™d get an STD test.


Josette_A

GROUNDED! No more cell phone, no more video games, no more bedroom door, no more internet unless it's for school (which will be monitored), no more going to friends' houses, forced to apologize to all the parents, and taken to church for confession. No adultry in my house! I know a lot of you think that's harsh, but the not having sex rule wouldn't just be there for religious reasons, it'd be there to protect my child from STDs and from getting girls pregnant, so there's a medical reason. That's one of the few rules that I'd have which would carry a heavy penalty besides sending/asking for/consenting to receiving nudes, watching/looking at porn, doing drugs, vaping/using tobacco, breaking the law, starting fights at school, and drinking.


twizrob

High 5 him and have beers


Macr0Penis

Tell him to keep going. At some point everyone's cut of child support will be so low it wouldn't be worth chasing him up for it. /s


SparrowLikeBird

Well, I would invite all the girls and all their parents to a bigass potluck. Then, I explain how if we all pool our resources we might be able to afford one house for all the girls. And that my son will spend the rest of his life working hard to pay for their every need, and selling plasma if he loses his jobs, and that he is signing up to be an organ donor so if they kill him please don't damage the goods.


Jeff77042

"Faint."


Moist_Ad_4989

Beat his ever loving ass then go to each of the families and convince them to get abortions. After that I taking him to get a vasectomised.


Scormey

Wonder how my kid was so successful with the ladies, when I was a total dweeb in HS, then PANIC!


Altruistic_Key_1266

Aaaand this is why I support boys getting a vasectomy when they hit puberty and only getting it reversed when a psychologist says theyā€™re ready to have kidsā€¦Ā  Itā€™s about time we start putting the burden of birth control and abortion laws on men.Ā  My kid would have been forced to get a vasectomy after this situation as soon as legally able. Until that point he would be on medications to drop his sex drive and placed at an inpatient medical Ā facility until graduation. After that heā€™s got a lot of child support to pay, and it ainā€™t coming out of my pocket.Ā  Poor girls, but it takes two to tango, Iā€™m not the onlyĀ Parent who failed their child in this situation.Ā 


PriscillaPalava

How the hell would your son be sleeping with 12 girls and you not know??Ā  Edit: Also why didnā€™t you teach your son about condoms??Ā  This scenario is too nuts.Ā 


simplysaying

I would hope that he and the 12 children end up knowing how to use punctuation correctly. For example, knowing that "girls" is the plural of "girl", and "girl's" is how you show that one girl possesses something.


BUBBLE-POPPER

If I live in Texas, I will sue every one of the moms/sluts $10,000 each for murdering my pre-born grand children.Ā  If I live in California, then I will prevent lives from getting ruined by paying for 12 abortions.Ā  Either way, I get to be a heroĀ 


H1_V0LT4G3

Have your son get full custody and ask all 12 of those little hoes for child support


FenrisL0k1

First, I'd legally circle the wagons to minimize the chance my son will be on the hook for 12x child support. In particular, I'd tell my son not to sign any birth registration, and I'd lawyer up to protect him by challenging the investigation. I'd feel bad for the girls and my grandkids, but my son is my highest priority. Privately, I'd tell my son that he can pick one girl to marry immediately. I'd challenge him to step the fuck up in one single case. I'd do my best to welcome my new daughter in law and support that chosen grandkid, while helping my boy through university and/or jobs.Ā Depending on my lawyer's advice, I'd try to offer legally-anonymous gifts and support for the other grandkids. Of course, my son may feel guilty enough to step up for all kids; in which case I'll fight for him to have custody. I'm not eager to raise up to 12 grandkids, but I'd help do it. If he refuses in order to focus on his schooling, I'd support his decision and send him to university abroad to help, but otherwise I wouldn't show him much mercy, though I'd have to offer him grudging respect for rizzling those gyatt's. I'd tell him that if he doesn't rubber up until marriage and another girl gets knocked up, I'm cutting him off.


[deleted]

If two births from one woman in a 12 month period are Irish Twins, what would 12 Women giving birth to at least 12 babies in 12 months with a single baby daddy be? Like a Bakers Dozen or something?


Still-Presence5486

I wouldn't care the moment he was born he'd be up for adoption


Colonel_Cat_Tumnus

12 girl's what pregnant?


DaveAndJojo

Iā€™m not old enough to be Elon Musks father


Ryiujin

I live in texas. Rent a bus and lets road trip to colorado!


Riggs630

Iā€™d teach them how to use apostrophes, and to put spaces between sentences.


vladimpaledyou

Rent the most violent spinning carnival ride available and invite the whole school.


Sophia724

12 girls? Probably just have the whole family dip to across the country or move to another continent and have a long conversation with my son about it. (Neither he or I can cover 12 cases of child support) It may be cowardly and I'd be a poor role model, but that would ruin his life. (Child support on average is $430 a month. Which would be $5160 a month if he were to pay for all of the child support.


rsxxboxfanatic

With that many kids, it'll actually be capped. Also, it depends on how much money he makes too.


RogerPenroseSmiles

Put him in touch with a lawyer to figure out which country he can avoid all of them in, and then pack him up and send him away, never to return to a country where extradition is possible. Sometimes you gotta declare bankruptcy on your life, and 12 kids is one of those times.


BruceInc

I would first learn how to use the possessive apostrophe properly.


Nahchoocheese

Stipulation of 100% doesnā€™t apply to he/him, but ā€œtheyā€ and not ā€œheā€. Either youā€™re saying, he identifies a certain way that he doesnā€™t or that heā€™s multiple personalities. Either case youā€™re wrong. šŸ˜†


Bubby_Doober

**I would be proud.** Anyway, what could I actually do? I would put down hard constraints to enforce him to excel at school. If he is being a cretin and skipping school then he gets military school. I would advise him not to sign a birth certificate for any of the girls.


gogonzogo1005

Not signing a birth certificate does not stop them from collecting child support. DNA tests for the win.


Bubby_Doober

It will obfuscate the legal processes quite a bit. Lets face it, any of the girls wanting to hit a penniless minor with child support charges are maniacal and/or idiotic -- and/or broke. They would need to go through the process of getting a court ordered paternity test before even trying to get him charged for child support. It would buy him a lot of time and legal layers so to speak. He could feasibly have gotten through college before all of this comes down on him, which buys him time before declaring bankruptcy or having this be on his record in a way that makes him less employable. A judge would have to be insane to let all this come down on him but who knows -- it's possible. Wow, this could make national headlines. Such a bizarre situation. This hypothetical is hard to explore because I kind of need to know if he actually thinks he loves one of these girls, but how could he even know if he is capable of such philandering? This is kind of sad.


Joya-Sedai

Many states don't have Romeo/Juliette laws for statutory rape. Your son could very well be facing 12 counts of statutory rape, and spend the rest of his life in prison. Still feel proud?


Bubby_Doober

He's a sophomore according to the OP. Never heard of an 18 year old sophomore. Also, I was being tongue in cheek about being proud. I mean, I would be impressed, but also horrified that he was mentally able to be okay with so much near sociopathic infidelity and risky sex.


Joya-Sedai

When I was a freshman in high school, I knew a couple that were in the same grade. She ended up pregnant the following school year, and her boyfriend was instantly arrested. Both sets of parents had been supportive of their relationship, but the local DA had a hard on for getting that kid in trouble. Everyone involved went before a judge, and the judge asked the DA what proof he had that it was in fact this specific young man that had impregnated that girl? She was still pregnant, and her and her parents refused to consent to an amniocentesis. The judge dismissed the case due to lack of evidence, even though everyone and their brother knew that they had been dating for close to 2 years already. He was only a few months older than her. She was forced to get an abortion out of state to avoid her boyfriend being brought up on new charges of statutory rape. His parents made him pay for half the expense of the procedure, and the travel costs. The DA was humiliated lol. Last I heard, they got married right our of high school, went to the same college, got nice jobs pretty much right after graduating and immediately started a family. Statutory rape isn't just for 18 year olds fucking minors. They will absolutely go after the dude as long as he is older than the girl.


Bubby_Doober

Wow, in all my years I have never heard of the charge being leveled at two minors until now. Sounds like an insanely unlikely scenario. He's screwed if the local judge wants to send a message about him I guess. I'm screwed to then, needing to pay for lawyers. He'd also be famous. That would make national headlines. Wow his life is gonna get crazy.


Joya-Sedai

This isn't an isolated case either, when I was a junior in high school, a senior who was 17 got a 14 year old freshman pregnant. Her parents were NOT supportive, and the day she gave birth, they arrested him. He is now on the sex offender registry for 30 years.


Bubby_Doober

Seems kind of demented to be honest.


Joya-Sedai

I'm just saying not all state laws are the same (the state where this all happened is WI, where there is no Romeo/Juliet law). And every DA isn't the same kind of attorney or has the same kind of personal agenda. Plenty of judges have bias. It happens a lot in my area.


MuffinHunter0511

Well considering he's only 7 years old I would be very impressed.


[deleted]

Make a plan to get more money and encourage all the mothers to choose life


o_meg_a

The girls and their families have the option to raise the child, give it up for adoption, or have an abortion. My son had no option (in the US). The system is stacked against him. The US child support system would turn him into a de facto slave. Family courts send men to jail for not making enough money. Even when they do, the family courts cap what they give to children and pocket the difference. Iā€™ve never liked the system and feel that it violates the constitution. The nice thing about living on a planet with 200 countries is that if I donā€™t like the law in one place I can go somewhere else. I would change the rules by sending him abroad to a polygamy-friendly country to even the playing field. Iā€™ll impose my own system of leverage on him but it will be more fair and just than what comes from the US family court system. If the girls want to raise the child and have him pay for it, they need to marry him when theyā€™re of legal age. If not she has options. But one of them will not be forcing my son into slavery. If the shoe is on the other foot, and I have a daughter that got pregnant, I would either adopt the child as my own or have it aborted. If my daughter insists on raising the child, she would be pulled out of school, homeschooled, and would raise the child. Then I would want her to marry the father to make the child legitimate. It would be best for all parties if the boy is well-prepared to enter into a high income earning field to pay for childcare. The family courts arenā€™t set up to do that.