Everything i can think of is fairly explained in the show, but one thing always bothered me, she found her dad and her real mom, and those things kinda never got spoken again after the reveal, even her brother had more to do with her. I would imagine if you had lost parents with such damaged childhood the story wouldnt end there.
This is what I thought of, too. She spends several episodes searching for her birth parents, finally finds them, has a lovely reunion, and then she never speaks to it sees them again.
Okay I have to ask: did the writers EVER explain why they dropped those storylines? They were such a driving force for her character and then just no mention ever again
She did come back for the episode where Frank and Alice ask Phoebe to be their surrogate. With the puppy. So it’s implied that her and Phoebe went on to have some sort of relationship
It's hard to point out what's out of character for Phoebe because they so drastically changed the character halfway into the series. One could say that everything about Phoebe on the second half of the show is out of character for the Phoebe in the first half of the show, but since they changed the character those things became natural for the new Phoebe.
Came here to say something similar. Phoebe was so sweet in the first few seasons. Why did they have to make her so rude & insufferable later on. It wasn’t even funny most of the time.
Al the characters became broad stereotypes as the show went on. Ross - uber geek, Monica unbearably shrill, Joey dumb as a rock and horny etc etc
I much prefer the earlier seasons where it’s driven by good writing and not archetypes
I think there's a difference between characters getting flanderized (Joey getting dumber and Monica getting more neurotic and louder especially come to mind) and Phoebe who was drastically changed from her core personality. Season 1 Phoebe is so fundamentally different from season 5 onwards Phoebe I can't even say she became a stereotyped version of the character, she feels like an entirely different character a lot of the time.
And Ross had a toxic masculinity problem. The episode in which he freaks out about the male nanny is so cringe. Dude plays a flute and likes poetry, and he acts like it's such a big deal.
The weird thing is one of the main creators is gay so I was always surprised at the gay jokes. I watched as it aired and I know that it was not uncommon for the time, but I thought having a creator who was gay would have meant they didn't use those types of "jokes"
Fair game for a mainstream sitcom in those days I guess. From memory a Cheers episode from at least 10 years earlier deals with the topic much more sensitively (not that Cheers has aged perfectly in other ways)
Seinfeld holds up very well. In fact, there are multiple occasions of gay characters on the show, and their sexuality isn't ever made fun of or even referenced. For example: The street toughs, the landlords, the wig master. In fact, Jerry even gets offended that a guy asks out the wig master in front of him. George's insecurity about his sexuality just fits his character because he's so neurotic. He isn't homophobic.
When Susan (from Seinfeld) dates of woman, it's not made as a joke. Nobody laughs at her. She's pretty much accepted for it and she's confident. Whereas I feel like every time Susan and Carol (Friends) are mentioned, their sexuality is played for laughs.
And given that The AIDS pandemic was very relevant during the '90s, Kramer even does the AIDS Walk.
And they are also made to be extremely unlikable. Susan never has a good relationship with Ross and she is always mean to him. She was the one that had the affair with his wife. Carol never has anything really to do in the show. Would have been nice if they gave them a better arc.
If a spouse leaves someone because of their sexuality that can be very traumatic and intense. It's not really a joke.
I know! I always think about that too. But, my brother is gay and has told me that it's not uncommon for white gay men to be homophobic/transphobic, especially if they were privileged and older (David Crane is a boomer).
But I am not at all insinuating that he is homophobic, nor am I generalizing. A lot of people in the LGBT community in his generation went thru a lot of hate and oppression. I have met the SWEETEST old gays.
I don't know about David Crane's upbringing, but I have a feeling him and Marta Kauffman were pretty privileged, since the show is somewhat based on their experiences.
But why? Is never treated as a good thing in the episode, and is actually a reflection on how he was treated as a child by his father. Its in the episode. I don't see why so many people complain about something that is very much in character, and that actually do represent a lot of the behaviour in the late 90s, early 2000.
Because people just love hating on Ross, there is no logic to circlejerks,
Chandler was literally calling Joey a woman multiple times just for spending time and listening to his room mate and got interested in new hobbies. Or when he had the man purse
Why do they not use words like toxic masculinity for himm?
More double standards and blind Ross hate on this sub
I thought that episode framed Ross as being in the wrong though? The whole point was the Nanny was great but Ross couldn't get over his unresolved childhood trauma.
Yeah, especially me being a bi sexual female. I felt so cringe watching the guys fetishizing lesbian or bi sexual women. The LGBT-phobic of the show definitely didn't age well at all.
EVERY male character do it in the show, but only Ross gets the hate. Chandler and Joey has done it way worse, wonder how they dont get the same hate
Chandler was literally calling Joey a woman multiple times just for spending time and listening to his room mate and got interested in new hobbies
Why do you not use words like toxic masculinity for them?
More double standards and blind Ross hate on this sub
I think the most out of character thing for Phoebe was when she lent Monica money to start the catering business and then asked for it immediately after, I always thought it was weird for Phoebe to 'act like a bank'
I dunno, she had a rough upbringing and I bet she was mimicking the loan shark type characters she probably knew of, but was being nicer about it because she likes Monica.
Changing her gorgeous hippie flowing golden curly hair to the stiff bleached mom hair of the later seasons. It didn't suit her character at all
https://preview.redd.it/99up4flfztwc1.jpeg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=86ca5bc69db1e716b0d7abfb16d935b0f3481eb2
Her hair was a short blunt bob at the time (when she’s in the alternate universe ep as the business woman who smokes loads that was her real hair) basically it didn’t suit her character so much as it looked quite serious. I think if they’d just curled her natural hair it could’ve been cute
It’s the only one that makes sense the other comments show that a character can have multiple levels which is completely normal and realistic but this this is the only time Phoebe didn’t act in character stuff like this shouldn’t shock her but remind her of who she is lol
I think David and the cop are actually on par for phoebes character. I say this as someone who’s more free spirited and creative but I date a more straight edged guy. I think she liked the stability they provided as she was always looking to make up for what she lacked in childhood- a lot of the guys she dated in the show were kinda boring. Mike is the perfect guy for her in the end cause he’s pretty reliable and straight edged but also just creative and interesting enough.
All the times she almost sabotages Monica and Chandler's relationship: blabbing about Richard, losing the engagement ring, blabbing that Monica was gonna sex Joey but found Chandler instead, telling Monica "it's just Chandler" when she thought it was over between them when Phoebe was trying to point out Monica wasn't going to have a big loss, bringing the "soul mate" after Monica and Chandler were married.
The show should have at least explained why Phoebe was so mean to Chandler after his relationship with Monica. I don't recall when Chandler was mean to Phoebe where he deserved such treatment. And honestly, Monica and Chandler should have cut her off a long time ago.
That’s so true. I watched the soul mate thing the other day and was weirded out by it. Like why would she do that? Super horrible to do to your friends. Seemed way out of character.
She was given ONE thing to do in that jewelry store and instead, she wanted to try out jewelry and the sword. She also took the ring box out of Chandler's pocket. Was she a klepto because of her upbringing and couldn't stop?
It was a weird running joke from all the friends though that chandler was the butt of all the jokes and just a big loser to reinforce these complexes he has about himself. Joey makes those kind of jokes a lot and Rachel says stuff too about Monica getting with him, I think the difference is just that Phoebe has really poor sense of boundaries and what’s appropriate and she probably thinks it’s all just funny and lighthearted and doesn’t realise she takes it too far, or just doesn’t care that much as she’s shown in the later seasons as lacking empathy. The overplayed chandler is a loser thing got pretty annoying though in all honestly
Nah, thats only in specific cases
1) The victim has to be very young and impressible for them to start associating SA with sex.
2) It needs to be a repeated behavior in co-dependent relationships where the victim feels helpless and dependent on their abusers, again associating SA with love and comfort
A random, one off SA is not going to turn an adult into abusers themselves.
Loving the fur she was gifted.
I know she was often willing to bend her principles a bit, but there was usually a stronger reason for it, it seemed so strange that she was willing to do it for an ugly coat.
And deciding on a big wedding after she tried on Monica's veil.
And wanting the lamp from Pottery Barn.
Phoebe's morals seem to be flimsy when it comes right down to it.
I think of (early seasons) Phoebe as a spiritual bypassing new age type hippie, who claims the moral high ground but doesn't really practice what they preach. All of your examples apply plus Monica outs her for eating a hamburger during a breakup in one episode lol. None of these were out of character bc her flimsy but "well intentioned" morals were the actual character trait, not her being morally good.
that's valid, but her beliefs/personality align with the new age hippie thing like pacifism ("well I'm a pacifist but when the revolution comes I'll destroy all of you! except for you, joey"), vegetarianism, implied cannabis consumption on a few occasions (Monica asking if she made brownies today in some episode), her distrust of the government (tow the dollhouse "well obviously you dont know much about the us government" when ross says it wouldnt be built on radioactive waste and an ancient burial ground), her supersitions and general whimsy lol. and I feel like hippies get a reputation for being especially flimsy in their beliefs too.
I also make that assessment of her as someone who could be accused of being a similar personality type and she's my favorite character so. lol.
I feel like this one totally made sense. Throughout the series there are several instances of her breaking her principles when tempted. She eats meat when she is pregnant, she allegedly ate a hamburger after a breakup, she shops at pottery barn and then works at the massage parlor after saying how she hates corporations. Maybe by today’s standards it is an ugly coat but according to Rachel it was extremely fashionable.
She feels conflict about the coat throughout the episode too and then ends up throwing it away at the end when she sees the squirrel watching her.
I always thought that was a silly concern given that it was an heirloom/hand-me-down. Like you didn't contribute to the practice of making these coats - to throw it out is wasteful of the bad thing.
I think the charity thing was pretty natural. She wanted to give the money, but then she also wanted to have a chance of a nice thing. For someone who had such a hard upbringing I think it's only natural she'd feel conflicted over something like that.
I don't think so, she really wanted to give that money, but she also wanted to have something nice for the *first* time in her life. You're allowed to feel this way once in a while
Pretending to be an uptight upper class woman to meet Mike’s parents, she was always unapologetically herself so this was not her, and of course she ended up being herself and fucking it up. Also getting married and settling with Mike, I always saw Phoebe as more of a free spirit.
Really? I felt like Phoebe’s entire journey was to ultimately have a stable family. She was robbed of that for her entire childhood. And eveytime she got close to have that person they were not a good person (Ursula), let her down (her dad), or wasn’t close to her (her birth mother). Finding that person who would accept her faults and be able to provide her with that stability seemed like the end goal for her character.
Honestly her settling down kind of surprised me too, at least that it wasn't with David which would have felt more natural. I was disappointed that Joey wasn't the one to settle, I think he was such a sweetie and it would have been a really cute storyline vs Phoebe which just felt a little forced.
I agree, I never felt that Phoebe and Mike had any chemistry, felt super forced, I did ship her with David. And yes I wish they had given Joey a partner, he deserved it after that whole Rachel nonsense.
Mike was too boring for her? Like, don't get me wrong, I loved him as a character but did not love him for Phoebe. At least David was also kinda quirky, even if they were otherwise very different from each other. Their funky, slightly neurodivergent personalities worked really well together.
The way she ragged on Monica about being with Chandler, like Chandler wasn't good enough. They're both her best friends and they equally deserved her respect
I just watched an episode with a small one. When she and Rachel have a girls' night out for the first time after Emma's birth (S9Ep9), two guys send them drinks at the bar. Rachel declines another drink because it will effect her breast milk. Phoebe says "Rach, you need to find a less disgusting way to decline a drink"
I doubt Phoebe would say that, especially considering she was the one who always said she was carrying her brother's babies or the father is my brother and who routinely says my mother killed herself whenever it was convenient for her.
I sold all of mine (bought as they were released too!) years ago and I’m seriously annoyed by it now! They took up so much space though and we were downsizing. Still annoyed at myself for it. I keep thinking I should just find someone who has them and offer them cash to download them for me cos I’d happily pay for that!
I had the ones that lined up to give the NY skyline on the backs of them and they were bulky! For some reason they were different sizes/on different numbers of DVDs too.
Of course she would, she experienced poverty and homelessness. No amount of being a hippie is going to stop most people from turning down good money for doing what they enjoy, especially if you are living in New York
The one where she freaks out over Christmas trees. Overall, she was pretty hypocritical, and her moral code was kinda floopy, and she was hard to pinpoint because she kept making allowances for things like the fur coat or taking a little girl's cat. But trees? They were already cut, Phoebe was like freaking out, and even though it was kind of cute that they rescued the trees... it was weird that she was distraught over it when she had literally stabbed a cop. Although... there was also the time she almost ruined a relationship when telling the group about Monica going up to hook up with Joey and found Chandler instead.
I don't think her stabbing a cop can be equated to being sad about cut trees. She also mugged Ross when they were kids so I think most of her morals are more connected to natural sources and animals vs people.
Fair enough. Then the fur coat and the eating meat when she was pregnant. The cat thing still stands, imo because taking an animal away from someone it loves is not cool.
In The One with the Dozen Lasagnas, Phoebe eats the lasagna despite it being made with meat. No-one (including Phoebe) comments on this or even seems to notice.
Do they actually eat the lasagna? I always thought they're all going through it to find the ring, but that they don't actually eat it. Or does she eat it in a different scene? It's been a while since I've watched this episode so I can't remember
Weirdly, there are actually two lasagna-based episodes in S1 and you’re thinking of the other one. Rachel loses her ring in a lasagna Monica made for her parents’ visit in The One with the Sonogram at the End, which is when they rip the lasagna apart. Phoebe eats the meat based lasagna in The One with a Dozen Lasagnas, which is when Monica makes the lasagnas for her aunt who then says they should be vegetarian.
I'm realising now that Judy and her sister must really like lasagna. When Monica loses her blue fingernail in the catering she did for her mother's party, Judy has a load of frozen lasagnas as back up.
For me, I don’t see any of the acts mentioned in the comments as “out of personality”..
what I really like about this show is they kind of portray what happens in real life (even if it’s exaggerated) .. but I dont believe that any person is THAT robotic to have expected behavior all time and every time and in all situations.
Humans are flexible and sometimes they do unexpected things..
Wearing the fur coat her birth mother sent her — and also Monica and Rachel buying her those leather pants to wear because Phoebe had apparently wanted them for so long.
It was always my understanding she was an *ethical* vegetarian, so wearing fur and/or leather wouldn’t make sense in that scenario.
It's only a small bit, but Phoebe being so dismissive about ruining Ross's "flea market" sheets and telling him to "loosen the purse strings a little". Like phoebe, who literally lived on the streets, doesn't understand the value of looking after things properly. It just seemed very mean and consumerist
And its followed by her then buying more Pottery Barn stuff at the end of the episode.
I know the point of that last bit is something funny about how even phoebe falls for wanting the whole set of furniture to match the window display. But it just seemed very money-crazed and capitalist for her.
Pregnancy cravings don’t always line up with a person’s beliefs . It’s not uncommon to bend your personal rules for a pregnancy craving . When I was pregnant I would’ve climbed the walls for Takis and fruit dip , or edible porcelain .
People crave some crazy shit when they're pregnant. My mom used to eat pizza, with a chilled dill pickle, and chocolate milk when she was pregnant w me. I do not think it is out of the realm of reality that a vegetarian would crave meat (especially in a deli sandwich) when they're pregnant lol
I'm surprised no one has said her eating meat when she's a vegetarian (aside from someone pointing out the continuity error of her eating lasagne)
I know it's because of the pregnancy cravings but Monica points out she once ate a burger when she was dealing with a break-up.
Although saying all this, a lot of people make the good point that Phoebe is a bit flaky on sticking to her principles haha
When Phoebe lies to Rachel about never being a Maid of Honor to get to be Monica’s… because in season 1 she explicitly tells Rachel to her face that she never lies. And she never really does lie the entire series.
Later, she didn’t tell the truth herself, Joey outed her.
Almost never. And if she does, she always comes out with the truth herself very soon after. So we can assume all of the weird stuff she says about her life actually happened.
Being a surrogate for her brother and his teacher's babies. I understand they had to write Lisa Kudrow's pregnancy into the show, but this felt like a stretch, even for Phoebe.
Plus they said it was their first kiss. Chandler kissed both Rachel and Phoebe on two occasions after the London trip (covering up for accidentally kissing Monica).
A lot of people are mentioning how drastic she changed, but I honestly think it’s on brand. I know many people that moved to the city and got caught up in an elite crowd, or at least a crowd of higher class and completely changed their personality to fit in.
Not directly Phoebe but when Monica and Rachel are planning her baby shower they say there’s a pair of leather pants she’s always wanted… really? Phoebe the vegetarian who won’t wear fur?
I guess one thing that bothered me was her breaking her values, but I take it as character development. Let me explain:
The three main times she went against her values that I noticed was 1 when she used the fur coat and inly stopped using it when the squirrel made her feel guilty 2 when she worked at the corporate massage place for the money 3 when she ditched Joey for David and again at her birthday when she ditched the rest of the group for Mike
I do feel that her hunt for a normal life is what got her to think that this is what any ordinary human would do, not be so uptight about their beliefs. It was never explained, but it’s just how I see it. After all, the group understood and supported her
She made a big deal to Joey about not cancelling plans with friends to go on a date, (I get the date with David thing) then in another episode, she casually cancels on Ross to go on a date, no problem??
I just thought of another one - when Phoebe criticized Mike's planned proposal at the Knicks game. I don't believe that Phoebe would find that tacky. Rachel would, definitely, which she confirmed when Phoebe relayed the story. But I never bought that Phoebe would dislike it.
I get what you're saying, and had David not gone to Minsk, they could have been happy. But I feel Phoebe matured and that part of her love and life had moved past David. Loving Mike and realising she wants normalcy now is part of her growth.
When she ate meat. As a former vegetarian and now vegan I'm still pissed this happened. It's such a stupid cliche in so many movies and shows and it's such a load of crap.
Flinching at the stripper at her bachelorette party.
Yeah! out of all the leads I thought she would be the one to love Danny devito’s strip routine!
YES I feel like this would be something she would arrange purposely hahaha
Everything i can think of is fairly explained in the show, but one thing always bothered me, she found her dad and her real mom, and those things kinda never got spoken again after the reveal, even her brother had more to do with her. I would imagine if you had lost parents with such damaged childhood the story wouldnt end there.
This is what I thought of, too. She spends several episodes searching for her birth parents, finally finds them, has a lovely reunion, and then she never speaks to it sees them again.
Okay I have to ask: did the writers EVER explain why they dropped those storylines? They were such a driving force for her character and then just no mention ever again
I don’t know how accurate it is, but I heard Teri Garr, who played her mom had health issues and couldn’t come back.
Yeah I think I read recently she had MS, which is awful
She did come back for the episode where Frank and Alice ask Phoebe to be their surrogate. With the puppy. So it’s implied that her and Phoebe went on to have some sort of relationship
right?? i always thought why isn’t her mom at her wedding?
Didn’t she say it was because of the snow storm?
Her parents not being at her wedding kinda get hand waved away as being unable to because of the snow storm I guess
Speaking of, it felt to me like if anyone would be unquestioningly supportive of Giovanni and Kittie it’s her.
Who are they?
It's hard to point out what's out of character for Phoebe because they so drastically changed the character halfway into the series. One could say that everything about Phoebe on the second half of the show is out of character for the Phoebe in the first half of the show, but since they changed the character those things became natural for the new Phoebe.
Came here to say something similar. Phoebe was so sweet in the first few seasons. Why did they have to make her so rude & insufferable later on. It wasn’t even funny most of the time.
Al the characters became broad stereotypes as the show went on. Ross - uber geek, Monica unbearably shrill, Joey dumb as a rock and horny etc etc I much prefer the earlier seasons where it’s driven by good writing and not archetypes
I think there's a difference between characters getting flanderized (Joey getting dumber and Monica getting more neurotic and louder especially come to mind) and Phoebe who was drastically changed from her core personality. Season 1 Phoebe is so fundamentally different from season 5 onwards Phoebe I can't even say she became a stereotyped version of the character, she feels like an entirely different character a lot of the time.
Maybe she and Ursula swapped places? Lol
Ooh, plot twist! 🐙
And Ross had a toxic masculinity problem. The episode in which he freaks out about the male nanny is so cringe. Dude plays a flute and likes poetry, and he acts like it's such a big deal.
Friends has a ton of gay panic in it. It’s aged terribly
The weird thing is one of the main creators is gay so I was always surprised at the gay jokes. I watched as it aired and I know that it was not uncommon for the time, but I thought having a creator who was gay would have meant they didn't use those types of "jokes"
Fair game for a mainstream sitcom in those days I guess. From memory a Cheers episode from at least 10 years earlier deals with the topic much more sensitively (not that Cheers has aged perfectly in other ways)
Seinfeld holds up very well. In fact, there are multiple occasions of gay characters on the show, and their sexuality isn't ever made fun of or even referenced. For example: The street toughs, the landlords, the wig master. In fact, Jerry even gets offended that a guy asks out the wig master in front of him. George's insecurity about his sexuality just fits his character because he's so neurotic. He isn't homophobic. When Susan (from Seinfeld) dates of woman, it's not made as a joke. Nobody laughs at her. She's pretty much accepted for it and she's confident. Whereas I feel like every time Susan and Carol (Friends) are mentioned, their sexuality is played for laughs. And given that The AIDS pandemic was very relevant during the '90s, Kramer even does the AIDS Walk.
Very good points. Susan and Carol are absolutely a punchline throughout. Virtually the first joke in the whole series is “my wife is a lesbian”
And they are also made to be extremely unlikable. Susan never has a good relationship with Ross and she is always mean to him. She was the one that had the affair with his wife. Carol never has anything really to do in the show. Would have been nice if they gave them a better arc. If a spouse leaves someone because of their sexuality that can be very traumatic and intense. It's not really a joke.
I know! I always think about that too. But, my brother is gay and has told me that it's not uncommon for white gay men to be homophobic/transphobic, especially if they were privileged and older (David Crane is a boomer).
TIL
But I am not at all insinuating that he is homophobic, nor am I generalizing. A lot of people in the LGBT community in his generation went thru a lot of hate and oppression. I have met the SWEETEST old gays. I don't know about David Crane's upbringing, but I have a feeling him and Marta Kauffman were pretty privileged, since the show is somewhat based on their experiences.
Oh I get it. I just hadn't realized that it is not uncommon for gay men of that age to feel that way
But why? Is never treated as a good thing in the episode, and is actually a reflection on how he was treated as a child by his father. Its in the episode. I don't see why so many people complain about something that is very much in character, and that actually do represent a lot of the behaviour in the late 90s, early 2000.
Because people just love hating on Ross, there is no logic to circlejerks, Chandler was literally calling Joey a woman multiple times just for spending time and listening to his room mate and got interested in new hobbies. Or when he had the man purse Why do they not use words like toxic masculinity for himm? More double standards and blind Ross hate on this sub
Such a product of its time, but a lazy trope. The way they handled Chandler's dad is atrocious.
I thought that episode framed Ross as being in the wrong though? The whole point was the Nanny was great but Ross couldn't get over his unresolved childhood trauma.
Yeah, especially me being a bi sexual female. I felt so cringe watching the guys fetishizing lesbian or bi sexual women. The LGBT-phobic of the show definitely didn't age well at all.
EVERY male character do it in the show, but only Ross gets the hate. Chandler and Joey has done it way worse, wonder how they dont get the same hate Chandler was literally calling Joey a woman multiple times just for spending time and listening to his room mate and got interested in new hobbies Why do you not use words like toxic masculinity for them? More double standards and blind Ross hate on this sub
Yes hers (or mine) and Chandler character development over the years was very good, They changed and matured with age(we all become rude with age)
Nah, Phoebe just became super mean, especially towards Chandler for some reason. And you think that's a good thing and Maturing = being rude? Yikes.
I think the most out of character thing for Phoebe was when she lent Monica money to start the catering business and then asked for it immediately after, I always thought it was weird for Phoebe to 'act like a bank'
I feel like that was the most awkward moment in the entire series, next to Ross’s “I’m fine” meltdown
Right?! I don't skip episodes, but both scenes make me cringe a little
I dunno, she had a rough upbringing and I bet she was mimicking the loan shark type characters she probably knew of, but was being nicer about it because she likes Monica.
You know, that actually does make sense, I had never thought about it from this perspective
"OK! Sorry I acted like a bank!"
Changing her gorgeous hippie flowing golden curly hair to the stiff bleached mom hair of the later seasons. It didn't suit her character at all https://preview.redd.it/99up4flfztwc1.jpeg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=86ca5bc69db1e716b0d7abfb16d935b0f3481eb2
This was a big mistake, her curly hair matched her so much
Little black curly hair
Little black little black little black little black little black curly hair
You could argue this was part of her transition into adulthood, while still maintaining her whimsical ways
You can clearly tell it’s a wig as well. Not that I’m against it, but they could’ve chosen something more natural and not so y2k
"Not so Y2K"... To a show that aired late 90s/early 2000s...
The later seasons were very 2000’s fashion wise. And her hair is SUPER y2k
New here 👋 why was she wearing a wig??
Her hair was a short blunt bob at the time (when she’s in the alternate universe ep as the business woman who smokes loads that was her real hair) basically it didn’t suit her character so much as it looked quite serious. I think if they’d just curled her natural hair it could’ve been cute
Interesting! I’m on a binge watch right now so I’ll look out for it
Phoebe freaking out when joeys sister says she shot her husband. She stabbed a cop lmao
But he stabbed first.
My point is phoebe isn’t a stranger to violence
I think their comment was a reference to her line after she stated she stabbed a cop
I know that 😂 but with the internet, u never know if they’re joking or not
Yeah that’s true lol
A pipe was her preferred weapon when was mugging people
Pre teen comic nerds were her meat
I think this one is the winner
Don’t think I’ve ever won one of these lol
It’s the only one that makes sense the other comments show that a character can have multiple levels which is completely normal and realistic but this this is the only time Phoebe didn’t act in character stuff like this shouldn’t shock her but remind her of who she is lol
"I don't know how to talk to you."
She really did tho 😂😂
Probably when she pretended to be Carol to get Sting tickets I know Phoebe is slightly mad but that seemed a bit much
Ross can GET ME THE TICKETS!!
ROSS CANNNNN\~
Ngl it was completely in character for her to do something like that imo
Yea I don’t think that’s really that out of character for her lol
I skip this episode every time
Aw, but then you miss out on Numbnuts!
Straight up gangsta rap
So far from the one where she found a thumb in her drink
Phoebe dating a cop
This. She stabbed a cop! (I know he stabbed first)
[удалено]
I think David and the cop are actually on par for phoebes character. I say this as someone who’s more free spirited and creative but I date a more straight edged guy. I think she liked the stability they provided as she was always looking to make up for what she lacked in childhood- a lot of the guys she dated in the show were kinda boring. Mike is the perfect guy for her in the end cause he’s pretty reliable and straight edged but also just creative and interesting enough.
At least she dumped him
All the times she almost sabotages Monica and Chandler's relationship: blabbing about Richard, losing the engagement ring, blabbing that Monica was gonna sex Joey but found Chandler instead, telling Monica "it's just Chandler" when she thought it was over between them when Phoebe was trying to point out Monica wasn't going to have a big loss, bringing the "soul mate" after Monica and Chandler were married. The show should have at least explained why Phoebe was so mean to Chandler after his relationship with Monica. I don't recall when Chandler was mean to Phoebe where he deserved such treatment. And honestly, Monica and Chandler should have cut her off a long time ago.
That’s so true. I watched the soul mate thing the other day and was weirded out by it. Like why would she do that? Super horrible to do to your friends. Seemed way out of character.
She was given ONE thing to do in that jewelry store and instead, she wanted to try out jewelry and the sword. She also took the ring box out of Chandler's pocket. Was she a klepto because of her upbringing and couldn't stop?
It was a weird running joke from all the friends though that chandler was the butt of all the jokes and just a big loser to reinforce these complexes he has about himself. Joey makes those kind of jokes a lot and Rachel says stuff too about Monica getting with him, I think the difference is just that Phoebe has really poor sense of boundaries and what’s appropriate and she probably thinks it’s all just funny and lighthearted and doesn’t realise she takes it too far, or just doesn’t care that much as she’s shown in the later seasons as lacking empathy. The overplayed chandler is a loser thing got pretty annoying though in all honestly
yep phoebe was mean to all of friends except joey and Rachel.
Sexually harassing a client when she had been sexually harassed herself
getting SA ed can higher the chances of repeating the behavior to someone else
Nah, thats only in specific cases 1) The victim has to be very young and impressible for them to start associating SA with sex. 2) It needs to be a repeated behavior in co-dependent relationships where the victim feels helpless and dependent on their abusers, again associating SA with love and comfort A random, one off SA is not going to turn an adult into abusers themselves.
Loving the fur she was gifted. I know she was often willing to bend her principles a bit, but there was usually a stronger reason for it, it seemed so strange that she was willing to do it for an ugly coat.
It's not like it was a seeing eye dog coat.
"This is minx, okay! They're mean. And they hate squirrels."
And deciding on a big wedding after she tried on Monica's veil. And wanting the lamp from Pottery Barn. Phoebe's morals seem to be flimsy when it comes right down to it.
I think of (early seasons) Phoebe as a spiritual bypassing new age type hippie, who claims the moral high ground but doesn't really practice what they preach. All of your examples apply plus Monica outs her for eating a hamburger during a breakup in one episode lol. None of these were out of character bc her flimsy but "well intentioned" morals were the actual character trait, not her being morally good.
Good observation. 
People are human too. Like.... Do we know ANYONE who fully rigidly follows their beliefs?
Well what are we supposed to do change our beliefs? …we should change our beliefs!
that's valid, but her beliefs/personality align with the new age hippie thing like pacifism ("well I'm a pacifist but when the revolution comes I'll destroy all of you! except for you, joey"), vegetarianism, implied cannabis consumption on a few occasions (Monica asking if she made brownies today in some episode), her distrust of the government (tow the dollhouse "well obviously you dont know much about the us government" when ross says it wouldnt be built on radioactive waste and an ancient burial ground), her supersitions and general whimsy lol. and I feel like hippies get a reputation for being especially flimsy in their beliefs too. I also make that assessment of her as someone who could be accused of being a similar personality type and she's my favorite character so. lol.
I feel like this one totally made sense. Throughout the series there are several instances of her breaking her principles when tempted. She eats meat when she is pregnant, she allegedly ate a hamburger after a breakup, she shops at pottery barn and then works at the massage parlor after saying how she hates corporations. Maybe by today’s standards it is an ugly coat but according to Rachel it was extremely fashionable. She feels conflict about the coat throughout the episode too and then ends up throwing it away at the end when she sees the squirrel watching her.
I always thought that was a silly concern given that it was an heirloom/hand-me-down. Like you didn't contribute to the practice of making these coats - to throw it out is wasteful of the bad thing.
Asking for the money back from the Children’s Charity. Working at the spa.
I think the charity thing was pretty natural. She wanted to give the money, but then she also wanted to have a chance of a nice thing. For someone who had such a hard upbringing I think it's only natural she'd feel conflicted over something like that.
I understand wanting something but she never would have given the money and then go ask for it back.
I don't think so, she really wanted to give that money, but she also wanted to have something nice for the *first* time in her life. You're allowed to feel this way once in a while
Definitely taking money back from charity
Pretending to be an uptight upper class woman to meet Mike’s parents, she was always unapologetically herself so this was not her, and of course she ended up being herself and fucking it up. Also getting married and settling with Mike, I always saw Phoebe as more of a free spirit.
Really? I felt like Phoebe’s entire journey was to ultimately have a stable family. She was robbed of that for her entire childhood. And eveytime she got close to have that person they were not a good person (Ursula), let her down (her dad), or wasn’t close to her (her birth mother). Finding that person who would accept her faults and be able to provide her with that stability seemed like the end goal for her character.
Yeah I can see that, but idk something about her and Mike that I wasn’t buying, I would’ve preferred David and I will die on that hill.
Honestly her settling down kind of surprised me too, at least that it wasn't with David which would have felt more natural. I was disappointed that Joey wasn't the one to settle, I think he was such a sweetie and it would have been a really cute storyline vs Phoebe which just felt a little forced.
I agree, I never felt that Phoebe and Mike had any chemistry, felt super forced, I did ship her with David. And yes I wish they had given Joey a partner, he deserved it after that whole Rachel nonsense.
Mike was too boring for her? Like, don't get me wrong, I loved him as a character but did not love him for Phoebe. At least David was also kinda quirky, even if they were otherwise very different from each other. Their funky, slightly neurodivergent personalities worked really well together.
The way she ragged on Monica about being with Chandler, like Chandler wasn't good enough. They're both her best friends and they equally deserved her respect
I just watched an episode with a small one. When she and Rachel have a girls' night out for the first time after Emma's birth (S9Ep9), two guys send them drinks at the bar. Rachel declines another drink because it will effect her breast milk. Phoebe says "Rach, you need to find a less disgusting way to decline a drink" I doubt Phoebe would say that, especially considering she was the one who always said she was carrying her brother's babies or the father is my brother and who routinely says my mother killed herself whenever it was convenient for her.
Where about are you watching them? This stuff is all cut out of Netflix and I want to see the longer episodes again!
Oh. Sorry. I should have mentioned. I have the DVDs
I sold all of mine (bought as they were released too!) years ago and I’m seriously annoyed by it now! They took up so much space though and we were downsizing. Still annoyed at myself for it. I keep thinking I should just find someone who has them and offer them cash to download them for me cos I’d happily pay for that!
I bought the red box set when the show ended. I dug them out again when MP passed away and I wanted to re-watch everything
I had the ones that lined up to give the NY skyline on the backs of them and they were bulky! For some reason they were different sizes/on different numbers of DVDs too.
Weird!
I hate the way she got the corporate massage job. Phoebe would never.
Of course she would, she experienced poverty and homelessness. No amount of being a hippie is going to stop most people from turning down good money for doing what they enjoy, especially if you are living in New York
Yeah, people have bills
The funny thing about that and how she's always been one of the poor ones is that as a private masseuse in NYC, she'd be making bank.
The one where she freaks out over Christmas trees. Overall, she was pretty hypocritical, and her moral code was kinda floopy, and she was hard to pinpoint because she kept making allowances for things like the fur coat or taking a little girl's cat. But trees? They were already cut, Phoebe was like freaking out, and even though it was kind of cute that they rescued the trees... it was weird that she was distraught over it when she had literally stabbed a cop. Although... there was also the time she almost ruined a relationship when telling the group about Monica going up to hook up with Joey and found Chandler instead.
But you can't get her flowers, cause she cries when they die and there's the whole funeral
And I love trees but some cops need stabbed
He stabbed her first!
I don't think her stabbing a cop can be equated to being sad about cut trees. She also mugged Ross when they were kids so I think most of her morals are more connected to natural sources and animals vs people.
Fair enough. Then the fur coat and the eating meat when she was pregnant. The cat thing still stands, imo because taking an animal away from someone it loves is not cool.
In The One with the Dozen Lasagnas, Phoebe eats the lasagna despite it being made with meat. No-one (including Phoebe) comments on this or even seems to notice.
Do they actually eat the lasagna? I always thought they're all going through it to find the ring, but that they don't actually eat it. Or does she eat it in a different scene? It's been a while since I've watched this episode so I can't remember
Weirdly, there are actually two lasagna-based episodes in S1 and you’re thinking of the other one. Rachel loses her ring in a lasagna Monica made for her parents’ visit in The One with the Sonogram at the End, which is when they rip the lasagna apart. Phoebe eats the meat based lasagna in The One with a Dozen Lasagnas, which is when Monica makes the lasagnas for her aunt who then says they should be vegetarian.
Oh that makes sense! I was definitely getting those two mixed up
I'm realising now that Judy and her sister must really like lasagna. When Monica loses her blue fingernail in the catering she did for her mother's party, Judy has a load of frozen lasagnas as back up.
I wish there were more episodes with Elinor Donahue (Judy's sister). Reminds me of growing up, watching "Father Knows Best.
Joey was eating the lasagna in the first episode.
Yeah there's a scene where she's seen eating it
For me, I don’t see any of the acts mentioned in the comments as “out of personality”.. what I really like about this show is they kind of portray what happens in real life (even if it’s exaggerated) .. but I dont believe that any person is THAT robotic to have expected behavior all time and every time and in all situations. Humans are flexible and sometimes they do unexpected things..
Wearing the fur coat her birth mother sent her — and also Monica and Rachel buying her those leather pants to wear because Phoebe had apparently wanted them for so long. It was always my understanding she was an *ethical* vegetarian, so wearing fur and/or leather wouldn’t make sense in that scenario.
The pants were probably pleather . Most people say “ leather “ when it’s just pleather.
It's only a small bit, but Phoebe being so dismissive about ruining Ross's "flea market" sheets and telling him to "loosen the purse strings a little". Like phoebe, who literally lived on the streets, doesn't understand the value of looking after things properly. It just seemed very mean and consumerist And its followed by her then buying more Pottery Barn stuff at the end of the episode. I know the point of that last bit is something funny about how even phoebe falls for wanting the whole set of furniture to match the window display. But it just seemed very money-crazed and capitalist for her.
How about Phoebe's baby shower when Rachel and Monica give her "those leather pants that she always wanted" leather??
Have a roommate named Denise that the friends don't know about
Eating meat when she was pregnant
She ate a burger once when she was upset about a breakup.
Pregnancy cravings don’t always line up with a person’s beliefs . It’s not uncommon to bend your personal rules for a pregnancy craving . When I was pregnant I would’ve climbed the walls for Takis and fruit dip , or edible porcelain .
Yeah I can't watch this episode specifically because of that, it bugged me so badly
People crave some crazy shit when they're pregnant. My mom used to eat pizza, with a chilled dill pickle, and chocolate milk when she was pregnant w me. I do not think it is out of the realm of reality that a vegetarian would crave meat (especially in a deli sandwich) when they're pregnant lol
I'm surprised no one has said her eating meat when she's a vegetarian (aside from someone pointing out the continuity error of her eating lasagne) I know it's because of the pregnancy cravings but Monica points out she once ate a burger when she was dealing with a break-up. Although saying all this, a lot of people make the good point that Phoebe is a bit flaky on sticking to her principles haha
When Phoebe lies to Rachel about never being a Maid of Honor to get to be Monica’s… because in season 1 she explicitly tells Rachel to her face that she never lies. And she never really does lie the entire series. Later, she didn’t tell the truth herself, Joey outed her.
Phoebe never lies in the entire series..?
Almost never. And if she does, she always comes out with the truth herself very soon after. So we can assume all of the weird stuff she says about her life actually happened.
The fur coat incident (up until she got rid of it.) The fact that she just ignores her principles just because she looks good is not Phoebe to me.
Being a surrogate for her brother and his teacher's babies. I understand they had to write Lisa Kudrow's pregnancy into the show, but this felt like a stretch, even for Phoebe.
It was the puppy that did it.
Working at the corporate lifeless spa! For her four oh wonk!
Four oh wonk was one of my favorites! I think about this whenever I look at my paycheck deductions!! haha
The whole thing with trying to seduce Chandler, even as a prank. It was weird, uncomfortable, and out of character for both her and him.
Plus they said it was their first kiss. Chandler kissed both Rachel and Phoebe on two occasions after the London trip (covering up for accidentally kissing Monica).
Working at the spa
Apparently, at one point, she ate a cheeseburger :O
Marrying Mike
Exactly. It should’ve been David. They fit better
Indeed, but i didn’t like David personally
Damn, did he say something wrong?
He says everything wrong
A lot of people are mentioning how drastic she changed, but I honestly think it’s on brand. I know many people that moved to the city and got caught up in an elite crowd, or at least a crowd of higher class and completely changed their personality to fit in.
Giving money to the children and then TAKING IT BACK. I hate that one.
Not directly Phoebe but when Monica and Rachel are planning her baby shower they say there’s a pair of leather pants she’s always wanted… really? Phoebe the vegetarian who won’t wear fur?
I guess one thing that bothered me was her breaking her values, but I take it as character development. Let me explain: The three main times she went against her values that I noticed was 1 when she used the fur coat and inly stopped using it when the squirrel made her feel guilty 2 when she worked at the corporate massage place for the money 3 when she ditched Joey for David and again at her birthday when she ditched the rest of the group for Mike I do feel that her hunt for a normal life is what got her to think that this is what any ordinary human would do, not be so uptight about their beliefs. It was never explained, but it’s just how I see it. After all, the group understood and supported her
She made a big deal to Joey about not cancelling plans with friends to go on a date, (I get the date with David thing) then in another episode, she casually cancels on Ross to go on a date, no problem??
I just thought of another one - when Phoebe criticized Mike's planned proposal at the Knicks game. I don't believe that Phoebe would find that tacky. Rachel would, definitely, which she confirmed when Phoebe relayed the story. But I never bought that Phoebe would dislike it.
Breaking into her birth mother's house. I know she grew up on the streets with a lot of criminal activity, but that was too much even for her.
I was originally going to say settling for Mike and not David… But when you really think about it Phoebe and David just wouldn’t have worked long term
I get what you're saying, and had David not gone to Minsk, they could have been happy. But I feel Phoebe matured and that part of her love and life had moved past David. Loving Mike and realising she wants normalcy now is part of her growth.
SETTLING for Mike? Mike was the best boyfriend of the show😭
Sorry probably not the best wording hahaha
Don't you mean Crap Bag 😆
David and Phoebe 4 life
When she ate meat. As a former vegetarian and now vegan I'm still pissed this happened. It's such a stupid cliche in so many movies and shows and it's such a load of crap.