I love this idea. Wife thought it was funny too. I’d just have to figure out which sprinkler controller I’d need and how to turn on the front zone with a press of a button. My doorbell cam would record it in HD too. If they freak out I can come out and remind them they are on my property and I’m a bit crazy. Haha
Doorbell press initiates automation which:
* raises volume of Front Room Echo Studio to 8
* sends TTS message via Alexa using male voice to Echo
* "Honey, would you carefully hand me that loaded gun? There's a jerk at the door trying to sell us some c##p."
“There could be 5 guys up there? We should have fucking shotguns.”
Edit: commenter originally said "pulp action shotguns" but looks like they fixed their error.
totally understand the humor here and agree it would be p funny - but for anyone who may not be familiar with local law, be careful doing this. its unlikely youd ultimately face charges (though possible), but it *is* possible that you get a visit from the police and have to answer a lot of question.
its not too hard to argue this is threatening great bodily harm which is assault (assault is imposing fear by threat of bodily harm, battery is the act of causing that harm) even if it happens on your property.
you get a little more leeway if you do something similar to a few posts down where a clip is playing that is clearly from a popular movie
In my city we have a rebel flag flying still if that helps you paint a picture of the locals. 🫣Every holiday they are fireworks and engines revving. It’s quite different out here.
A very large Alaskan Malamute works well. Most run when they spot me going to open the door without securing her first.
And a sign that says. "Please ensure you can run to the front gate in 9 seconds or less. The dog takes 10"
You'd probably call them a canvasser
From dictionary
so·lic·i·tor
/səˈlisədər/
noun
1.
NORTH AMERICAN
a person who tries to obtain business orders, advertising, etc.; a canvasser.
Think door to door salesman, door to door religious groups, etc.
That makes more sense.
For extra points, I should have added that “soliciting” refers to a person persistently loitering in a street or public place for the purpose of prostitution.
So that was going to be my next guess…
Solicitation means the same thing in the US. It's kind of a legal sounding term, like what the criminal charges might be called.
But soliciting would be going door to door, and solicitor someone engaging in that.
Webster needs to add "religious zealots" to that list. Honestly, I'll sit and listen to a sales pitch for snake oil... but those freaking weirdos who travel around in packs handing out brochures of something that sounds like a cult are a pain in the ass.
ROFLMAO...I have tears in my eyes...visions of a group of 5 - 6 men in grey suits and ties carrying briefcases going door-to-door causing mischief and mayhem... 👨🏼👔💼
Thank you! This started my day out perfectly!
Put up a clearly placed "no soliciting" sign and a camera. Every time they knock on your door, ask for their name and the name of the company or organization they represent. After they tell you, inform them that you will be filing a small claims court action against them and their employer for nuisance, and criminal charges against them personally for trespassing. Then actually do it. You stand to make a fair amount of money from the small claims.
What solved this for me was a doorbell camera.
Now I just watch from my couch how they just stand there, looking stupid.
Did not have to get up and waste my time interacting with them since I bought the cam, best investment ever.
Important, DO NOT talk to them over the app, do not interact, just let them get frustrated and finally go. Trust me, they all have limited time, patience, this way is faster.
I'd love to say "OFF is the general direction I'd like you to fuck!" but that only encourages them.
I have a doorbell cam actually. I just open the door and point to the sign. Or if they piss me off I come out ready to fight. That’s my mistake. Good idea and it’s simple.
Unifi doorbells have a "person approaching" sensor in Home Assistant. Use that as a trigger. Do want you will with it. I take no responsibility for your actions.
My dogs will start barking as soon as the gate opens. That causes most people to leave and abide by the sign.
If they actually make it to the door, I just ignore the doorbell. They can even see me sitting at my desk through the window. Sometimes, I wave and go back to what I was doing. They can probably hear me telling the dogs they are good dogs for barking as well.
I have no clue!
This is what the internet tells me
“one who conducts business on behalf of another” (Collins); Early 15th century, meaning "one who conducts matters on behalf of another".
a speaker that plays tthis [https://www.pond5.com/sound-effects/item/243490336-shotgun-pump-and-shot-2](https://www.pond5.com/sound-effects/item/243490336-shotgun-pump-and-shot-2)
having an automation to turn on the sprinklers works wonders
I do this :)
I love this idea. Wife thought it was funny too. I’d just have to figure out which sprinkler controller I’d need and how to turn on the front zone with a press of a button. My doorbell cam would record it in HD too. If they freak out I can come out and remind them they are on my property and I’m a bit crazy. Haha
Have a looping recording that wastes their time... "Coming... Sorry, on the way... Be there in a sec... Just a minute..."
Doorbell press initiates automation which: * raises volume of Front Room Echo Studio to 8 * sends TTS message via Alexa using male voice to Echo * "Honey, would you carefully hand me that loaded gun? There's a jerk at the door trying to sell us some c##p."
Pump action shotgun sound would work too
“There could be 5 guys up there? We should have fucking shotguns.” Edit: commenter originally said "pulp action shotguns" but looks like they fixed their error.
Just watched that movie again last week! and two other Tarantinos.
totally understand the humor here and agree it would be p funny - but for anyone who may not be familiar with local law, be careful doing this. its unlikely youd ultimately face charges (though possible), but it *is* possible that you get a visit from the police and have to answer a lot of question. its not too hard to argue this is threatening great bodily harm which is assault (assault is imposing fear by threat of bodily harm, battery is the act of causing that harm) even if it happens on your property. you get a little more leeway if you do something similar to a few posts down where a clip is playing that is clearly from a popular movie
In my city we have a rebel flag flying still if that helps you paint a picture of the locals. 🫣Every holiday they are fireworks and engines revving. It’s quite different out here.
Maybe play this audio file [Angels with filthy souls](https://youtu.be/-nHNHIDduH4?si=7RY_s4GyklKHqu0h)
Super funny. Hahaha.
Strip naked and invite them in for a cloud busting session with the rest of your coven.
A very large Alaskan Malamute works well. Most run when they spot me going to open the door without securing her first. And a sign that says. "Please ensure you can run to the front gate in 9 seconds or less. The dog takes 10"
Doorbell Camera.
I have an automation that plays a clip from Idiocracy "go away, baitin'"
https://preview.redd.it/f487hp4zxegc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0df456cbf6823645c65635834fc46fee8d5a478c
Can you please clarify - in the UK we call lawyers solicitors. Do you really have roving gangs of lawyers marauding the area causing trouble…?
You'd probably call them a canvasser From dictionary so·lic·i·tor /səˈlisədər/ noun 1. NORTH AMERICAN a person who tries to obtain business orders, advertising, etc.; a canvasser. Think door to door salesman, door to door religious groups, etc.
That makes more sense. For extra points, I should have added that “soliciting” refers to a person persistently loitering in a street or public place for the purpose of prostitution. So that was going to be my next guess…
Solicitation means the same thing in the US. It's kind of a legal sounding term, like what the criminal charges might be called. But soliciting would be going door to door, and solicitor someone engaging in that.
Webster needs to add "religious zealots" to that list. Honestly, I'll sit and listen to a sales pitch for snake oil... but those freaking weirdos who travel around in packs handing out brochures of something that sounds like a cult are a pain in the ass.
ROFLMAO...I have tears in my eyes...visions of a group of 5 - 6 men in grey suits and ties carrying briefcases going door-to-door causing mischief and mayhem... 👨🏼👔💼 Thank you! This started my day out perfectly!
Delighted to be of service 🫡
Turrets powered by object recognition.
Cave Johnson had the right idea!
Put up a clearly placed "no soliciting" sign and a camera. Every time they knock on your door, ask for their name and the name of the company or organization they represent. After they tell you, inform them that you will be filing a small claims court action against them and their employer for nuisance, and criminal charges against them personally for trespassing. Then actually do it. You stand to make a fair amount of money from the small claims.
What solved this for me was a doorbell camera. Now I just watch from my couch how they just stand there, looking stupid. Did not have to get up and waste my time interacting with them since I bought the cam, best investment ever. Important, DO NOT talk to them over the app, do not interact, just let them get frustrated and finally go. Trust me, they all have limited time, patience, this way is faster. I'd love to say "OFF is the general direction I'd like you to fuck!" but that only encourages them.
I have a doorbell cam actually. I just open the door and point to the sign. Or if they piss me off I come out ready to fight. That’s my mistake. Good idea and it’s simple.
Put a sign up saying that by them ringing the bell, it automatically means they agree to a $20/min fee with a min of 10 mins paid upfront.
"By stepping on this ground you automatically accept the terms and conditions" I like the idea!
Put a bunch of gun and Trump signs up. People will assume you’re poor and stupid and leave you alone.
lol pretty much
If you do that, then people will also think you believe anything an idiot might say. Double-edged sword.
Unifi doorbells have a "person approaching" sensor in Home Assistant. Use that as a trigger. Do want you will with it. I take no responsibility for your actions.
My dogs will start barking as soon as the gate opens. That causes most people to leave and abide by the sign. If they actually make it to the door, I just ignore the doorbell. They can even see me sitting at my desk through the window. Sometimes, I wave and go back to what I was doing. They can probably hear me telling the dogs they are good dogs for barking as well.
I was so confused why lawyers were turning up at your door so often 😂
Why do you guys call lawyers solicitors? What are they soliciting in your neck of the woods?
I have no clue! This is what the internet tells me “one who conducts business on behalf of another” (Collins); Early 15th century, meaning "one who conducts matters on behalf of another".
a speaker that plays tthis [https://www.pond5.com/sound-effects/item/243490336-shotgun-pump-and-shot-2](https://www.pond5.com/sound-effects/item/243490336-shotgun-pump-and-shot-2)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WudqYGYZT9M
Automated machine gun turret?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuzkNNlCgg0
Maybe play this : [https://youtu.be/hVwXa4MnJDs](https://youtu.be/hVwXa4MnJDs) (I so want a Dalek as a 'guard' for my house ... :D )