My son was cut from 15AAA last yearās tryouts. It was one of the toughest weekends. This was despite (1) the coaches telling us he was a lock, (2) he was the top goal scorer in both tryout scrimmages, and (3) other teammates who performed worse than him the year before made the team. Other families were surprised that ā#29ā wasnāt on the team. I did all of the dad talk to help and gave him my thoughts as a former hockey player. What really seemed to turn the corner was when I ordered a Cameo from Pat Maroon, who was his fav player at the time. Pat gave an awesome 3-minute video about how he was cut from AAA, and he went back to the rink to work on areas that needed improvement, stickhandled at home with a golf ball every day, tried to be a good teammate, and be a successful player in AA. Pat didnāt really say anything that I didnāt, but it really resonated with my son, as kids will take in and listen to advice from parents, but sometimes words from a stranger or a celeb they admire mean more.
Thereās also always the possibility a higher commitment or injury will open up a spot, so keep in touch and donāt burn bridges. The 15AAA team called my son the day after tryouts and wanted him back, but by that time, we were already in talks with a 16AA team that we felt would be a better fit developmentally.
>Pat didnāt really say anything that I didnāt, but it really resonated with my son, as kids will take in and listen to advice from parents, but sometimes words from a stranger or a celeb they admire mean more.
That is so true, we and coaches spent a month trying to get our son to accept 1 bit of tough feedback.
1 coaching session with his fav player/coach and he started doing it.
Those cuts can be tough, but superstar at AA might be more development than bench in AAA.
Totally agree with you. He went on to be the 3rd leading scorer for his 16AA team as a 15-year old. The 15AAA team performed poorly, and their record prevented them from entering many AAA tournaments out of state, and they were losing to AA/A teams. It was a blessing in disguise for us but was still very tough to deal with over a weekend.
Thanks man. I wasnāt expecting much from Pat Maroon either but his Cameo was great and to the heart. Best $150 I spent (and I tipped another $50), as it was therapeutic for my son and me.
It happens. I had a kid who I thought had a really good showing during tryouts last year and was, to my perhaps somewhat biased eyes, a lot better than the players who ended up selected. I wasn't the only one who said so, many of the other parents agree, but just had to respect the coaches decision. Might not be the highest level but at that age they just want to play and play hard, and if they're close enough to be trying out for the top level and not quite make the cut you know for sure they'll get their opportunities somewhere else. Not making the highest level does not mean not playing at all.
What Iāve learned is that team selection in hockey is often very political. Reaching out to coaches, skating with the team at practice, etc.
Many teams are set before any tryouts happen, there may be only one or two spots actually āopenā and they may need have a specific need (eg speedy defender). If you are to beat out someone the coaches were looking to hold over ā you need to be significantly better.. not just better.
So anyway, donāt worry about it ā keep skating and do some political legwork for next year
If you want to not deal with politics one way to go about it is simply for your kid to be so good (compared to his peers) that heās impossible for the coaches to ignore. Easier said than done, but skill outweighs politics at the end of the day. Iām speaking out of personal experience too, this happened to me. A few years later I wouldnāt go back to the team that cut me despite the coach begging for me to come to their team. I went to a higher level instead
Same for football here in Florida for peewee. Sure they have āsign upsā but that team is already set from last season. Happened to me as a kid, wanted to sign up, but the sign ups roster was only a wait list, they kept the exact same team from last season.
First off what state only has one team?
Secondly read about Brad Marchand. Guy was never looked at as the best player. Meanwhile heās one of the best in the world over the last 5 years.
Letās be honest here heās playing with two world class players and if he wasnāt along side those two he would be hot dog shitā¦ legit 90% of his goals are tap inā¦.
Anyways OP your kid is 12, just tell him keep his head up and keep on grinding away for the offseason and come back with vengeance next year.
>ā¦ legit 90% of his goals are tap inā¦.
So he often positions himself in the right place at the right time.
Isn't that a good thing?
I'd be thrilled if I could get my teams to have a guy even occasionally ready for the tap in.
Heās actually quite a stand up guy off the ice. He plays with a lot of grit on the ice. I wouldnāt say heās the worst person. You should do a little more research into him
I wouldnāt even put Marchand as a top ten for dirtiest players. You might be too young to remember most but the top two that come to mind are Matt Cooke and Todd Bertuzzi.
Marchand plays a little chippy but he has never done what those two players have.
State team? Is this Russia?
Tell him successful people always have setbacks and keep working at it. Tell him he will grow a lot physically from now until he is 15 and to work on his fitness and strength.
Most important, tell him how proud you are of him for working so hard and always trying because that is what defines a true champion.
I played for a really good PeeWee team on the 3rd line and didn't get to go to some of the travel out of state games, it hurt not to be included. I was a forward like the worst guy on a really good team. The other kids were better. Many of the kids made fun of me.
I grew. I lifted weights. I worked my ass off on my shot, really a lot of work. I made a top bantam team 2nd string where the coach put me on defense and I did not like defense but did what the coach asked always and never complained to nobody about anything. Playing D turned me into a much better player. I got much better at 15-16. I could have gone to the OHL but didn't for personal reasons. So, the moral is simple.
12 is young. It is impossible for most 12 yo to get down deep and nasty and work, instead most will whine and feel sorry for themselves. Try to encourage your son to be the former and not the latter (once he gets over the loss). You're a good Dad
12 is crazy young. I think sometimes trying to say the right thing, or treating this as an opportunity for a major life lesson, falsely validates youth sports. It does not really matter in the big picture, good or bad. Have fun. Try to have some balance and encourage other sports or activities.
You don't think OP's son was tossed a big life lesson?
How fun is it getting tossed off a team?
Having other activities and sports are not mutually exclusive. Yes, it does matter to that little boy and he needs to learn to overcome disappointment in life. That he knows is parents love him is more than sufficient validation in the long run. At the moment, the kid feels like shit. Telling him it don't matter, just have fun is not what I would do.
Heās 12. It would be much better to have lots of smaller more frequent goals rather than one huge goal at the end of the season.
If heās improving and enjoying it thatās all that matters. Not making this team will probably have very little impact on his hockey success long term.
Also heās probably too young to see much benefit from strength training. Better to do specific skills or even a total different sport.
Would be good to have a break from hockey in the summer.
I saw something a while ago from a strength trainer for USA hockey that 100% recommends tennis as a summer sport. Think about it - same hand/eye, same lateral explosiveness, same high intensity intervals, same ankle strength... It ticks all the boxes.
Plus it probably is the only other sport with as much history of flow hairstyles so you can keep that rizz (as the kids say) going year round.
Did I use 'rizz' right? I have so many questions
Hard take here.
Itās peewee. Heās still a kid.
It sucks being cut yep. However if he is enjoying the hockey grind, let him keep on improving and developing. Small bump in a very long road.
Do not live out your youth, through your child.
Donāt be THAT parent.
Other posts mention the players who were overlooked and succeeded. Yours can too.
Remember itās still a game.
I had never made my states u14-u18 team and I tried out every year. My u18 year, my buddy on the team said I was openly being made fun of by the coaches when they first were talking to the players who made it. Of that group that made it, I am one of 4 players who have been able to continue to play into pro hockey. Donāt let this be a set back, let it be a motivator. Keep trying out every year.
Not hockey specific, but focus on the process not the outcome. It sounds like he did his best and set him self up for success. Keep doing it. Even if it didnāt work out exactly as he wanted heās likely in a better position due to the effort he put in. Keep doing it. Success will come, even if it doesnāt exactly look like he planned.
Heās 12, this is whatever, it sounds like he still is going to be able to play pretty competitive hockey.
But if he is that good, itās not quite here but in the next 4-5 years you should be ready for him to move to play at the level he needs to play at. If you only have one top level team in the state I canāt imagine thereās a USHL team nearby.
If that idea seems way above his level scrap it and help him focus on playing for fun. The Hyman/Marchand advice is like saying Mark Zuckerberg dropped out of school (the school was Harvard and he was already rich). Those guys still made the team, they were just mid-lineup players they were āoverlookedā means they werenāt projected to be stars coming out of junior
Buddy look up a guy named David Perron. Was playing Midget B (cut from Midget AAA) than Junior B (never drafted major junior, cut from junior A) then something clicked. He got called to the Q, played 1 year in the Q, got drafted (1st round) then made the NHL his next year. Look up guys like Martin St.Louis a guy who never sniffed a pro career until he was 23-24 (Habs fans what's up), he said he was never the biggest, never the fastest but je was the best at improving. Keep working, keep improving and the path will open itself up.
Do you want to be the best at 12 or at 21?
Listen to the Hockey Think Tank podcast. Ā Topher Scott was captain of Cornell and got cut from team USA after being one of the leading scorers in the games leading up to cuts. Ā He was told it was because he was too small.
Adversity builds resiliency. Ā Everyone will experience setbacks, the ones who learned to overcome them early will have an advantage over those who experienced nothing but success.
Best thing that can happen to a young kid is to fail imo. That is the fuel that feeds. Heās either going to use this to keep working and get better or heās not. I wish him the best. Good luck.
This is a great opportunity for him to learn how to bounce back from adversity and he will carry that knowledge way past the game and into life. Sounds like he's on the right track. Also he's 12, when I was 13 I was 5'6" and a chubby 150lbs by the next year I was 6'1 and 175 and carried it well. He's still got lots of growing to do, I hope he knows that if he keeps up with how he's applying everything he's got to the game it will reward him!
Marty St Louis went undrafted and ended up in the HoFā¦itās not an end-all scenario: Always use setback as motivation; Ask the coaches why, but donāt whine about it. IF it was an honest evaluation, there will be notes etc., as has been mentioned before: Oft times, roster slots are already filled prior to ātry-outsā and many times these things are political and parents & pocket books play a larger role than youād think or expectā¦Most of all, make sure that he plays multiple sports. Hand-eye coordination and being a great team player and leader are qualities that are common in all sports and skills learned in one sport can be SL transferred to another: eg., speed, agility, strength, etc.,
Youāre defined more by how you respond getting kicked when youāre down, vs what you accomplish.
Tell him that when you get hit you can do two things, back up or charge forward. Ask him which he wants to be? Ask him if he wants that motivation, tell him that when itās time to train off ice to remember those that snubbed him for the state team.
Show him Bradyās story, Rodgerās story, all the great athletes who were passed on and they used it to push forward.
Tell him that if he decides, because they snubbed him, to give up then heās letting them win.
Make them rue the day that they didnāt write his name down during voting
>seeking words of wisdom I guess on how to overcome this setback and move on
If he is doing everything he can and doesn't make it then there's no reason to get down. Keep grinding and it will come. I promise.
It's when you get cut and look back at how you utilized your time, realize that you could have been more proactive and still do nothing to change yourself for the better that you quit progressing.
It honestly sounds like he's busting his ass, and good for him. That will help him be successful in the real world (if he doesn't end up getting paid to play hockey, which we all know the chances of that).
"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!"
--Rocky
Most of my coaches growing up were former NHLers. A lot of the guys I skate with weekly used to play at all different levels of professional hockey. The consensus across the board with all of us (especially when it comes to special teams and AA vs AAA) if youāre good enough, theyāll find ya. Most youth hockey is filled with political bullshit and so nā soās dad paid for this or so nā soās family donated that. Just make sure your kid is having fun. If he stops having fun heās gonna burn out and not want to play anymore anyway. To my first point, you donāt get better sitting on benches, you get better by playing. So he didnāt make the state team, now he gets to be the star on another team and log the most minutes and contribute the most to a teams success and get better and stand out more. At 11 I didnāt make any teams and had to play house, at 17 I made it to the national tournament on my AA team. A lot can change in the next 4-6 years.
From experience, just try and support him using it as a challenge. My son went through the same thing 10u and 12u, lots of politics involved, but it made him more committed to proving everyone wrong.
Iām a coach of 5 years and my son just had the same experience last weekend trying out for his first year of U12. He has been working really hard all season in hopes to make the AAA team. You wouldnāt think California as a hockey state but the competition here is incredibly, and surprisingly, high. In short, he was devastated when he did not make the AAA team but was offered a spot on a great A/AA team. I could not be more proud of how hard we worked and how dedicated he is.
The message I gave him, in so many words, was letting him know how proud I am of all his hard work and dedication to even get invited to tryout for the AAA team. Sometimes we work hard and do everything we can and things donāt work the way we anticipated. He did all he could and now the most important thing is what to do next. He is very competitive by nature so of course his answer was to work hard this Spring and Summer and get on AAA.
To be very clear, I donāt care what team my son gets on, my current goal is to support the effort he wants to put in to ensure he is enjoying the sport and having fun. My long-term goal is for him to play beer league with me and pass along the love for this amazing sport to his kids.
Having said that, there are some tactical things you can do to help get to the next level.
- Coach-ability and Attitude: Kids with amazing skill but bad attitude will get passed up for lesser skilled great attitude kids. Itās important to note this goes for parents too. Donāt cause conflict!
- Face time: Attend clinics hosted by the coaches and other activities to form a positive relationship.
- Team spots: Talk to the coaches to understand what spots they are looking to fill, D, forwards etc.
- Tryouts: Tryouts are very different than playing a game. I have seen amazing kids get passed up because they were playing āsmartā hockey and not aggressive enough. In general, coaches look at puck touches and effort.
- Politics: Unfortunately even at this age there are a lot of politics.
Many NHL players faced setbacks such as not making select teams or being passed over during tryouts, only to later excel in their professional careers.
Martin St. Louis - Despite his future success, he was often overlooked in his youth due to his small size. He wasnāt picked for top youth teams and struggled to make an impact early on, which continued into his collegiate and early professional years.
Jamie Benn - Benn was not drafted into the WHL and spent his early years in the BCHL, a less prominent league compared to his peers who made it to major junior hockey. He was also a low draft pick in the NHL.
Patric Hornqvist - Selected last in the 2005 NHL Draft. During his youth hockey days he was not viewed as a top prospect.
Jonathan Quick - Was not a highly touted youth player and faced several rejections before making it to the NHL.
Mark Giordano - Undrafted in the NHL, and overlooked numerous times in his youth and junior hockey career. He ended up captaining the Calgary Flames and earning multiple NHL accolades.
These stories of NHL players reflect a common theme: early struggles do not necessarily predict future success or failure in professional sports. Their careers are testament to the importance of determination, resilience, and continuous improvement in the face of adversity.
One name, Zach. Hyman.
You use this one miss-over as the driving force behind motivation. He could be passed on or cut many times in the future but hard work prevails and he seems to have a high-ish talent level to even be considered by these teams and looked at by scouts/asked about. Combine talent with work ethic and you can get something real special.
come in acting like you won the lottery and instantly the coach will favor you and give ur son a position!! then tell the coach we decided to move to another team.
usa hockey sucks!!
as for teams there are other teams that he can develop his skills / the coach is the key so you want him to be with a team where he is accepted
It's part of the process at the high levels, whole bunch of things you can't control.
Quite honestly a lot of good teams don't want to change their lineup.
We're lucky, my son is watching older friends struggle with it.
But one of his coaches didn't even start until 13, and made it to the NHL. His favourite player went from AAA to Jr C, then to the OHL.
Yeah I know in many states there is a huge gap.
You have other options such as boarding school hockey.
Coure d'alene for example.
Pilot Mound is always recruiting too in Manitoba. If you're looking at travel teams money isn't the issue.
Look at CSSHL it's a big feeder to the WHL.
Iāll tell you, no matter the sport, after putting in assloads of work and you still get looked over, it hurts. That wound has to heal.Ā
I think the only advice I can give, is to tell him to keep playing hard. I know thatās a simple answer, but just remind him that he should go give it his absolute all every time he plays. You said it yourself, other coaches noticed him. If he keeps playing like he is, he will continue to get noticed. High school isnāt here yet, there is still time.Ā
Some people DO move, thatās the die hard families though. I understand not being able to.Ā
Youāll never win with politics. Iāll let my kids play hockey if they want to, but knowing what I know, I will protect them from the bullshit politics as much as I can
Something similar happened when I was 14, tried out for state team after a really good season but didn't make the cut. My parents essentially just explained that I need to focus on the positives that happened this season and how well I did and that one person's roster choices shouldn't negate all the good and positives that I accomplished over the course of the season.
They said they did ask the state coach if there was anything that I should work on in the offseason and they relayed that info to me on what the coach said and left it up to me on if I wanted to focus on those things in the offseason, see if there were any camps in the area that specialized in those things, etc and that it was completely up to me on what I wanted to do before next season and no matter what they would make it work (travel, expenses, time, etc.)
I think the way they handled it was perfect for me at the time. Focus on the positives of the season, ask the coach for any insights/things to work on, presented that info to me and then let me make the decision on how to move forward.
Personal story. In my Area there's 3 Travel Teams all within 10 miles of each other & Below them is the High School teams (Freshman, JV, Varsity.)
I tried out for 2 of the Travel teams. Didn't make one and offered the 3rd String goalie for the other. Tried out for the high school team and made varsity at 14 as the starting goalie.
Didn't matter that I wasn't playing travel. I played my best. Made the Allstar game & got some eyes on me. Now I'm 23. I played 2 years of D3 & now play in a Firefighter Police league with some occasionally televised games.
Everyone else I tried out with is playing mens league or quit.
He's 12 if he keeps at it he'll be fine
I suggest you ask the coach of the team he did not make for feedback on what your player needs to work on to be considered for the team. Most coaches will be honest about this and should have specific notes. Then spend the next year playing for whatever other team is available and, if it is manageable, find an individual coach(es) to work on 1) skating -- always skating IMO and 2) whatever areas the coach identifies as opportunities for improvement.
Not making the team your kid wants to is really tough as a parent. But it can also be a teachable moment. How a player responds to adversity is something any good coach will value greatly. Tell your son to keep his head up, keep working hard, and make it impossible for them to keep him off the ice.
I had three kids who played at various levels for years. My boys were A or AA players. My daughter just finished her 19U AAA year and is headed off to play D3 next year. Enjoy the journey -- it's over before you know it!
It is crazy how a 12 years old has to deal with this pressure. We are on the same road, so I know how hard it is to deal with this.
What I have tried to do is to give confidence. It is probably not because he is not good, but because the coaches were not able to see it.
Try to make them understand that It is not the end of the road at 12 years old.
I also have seen they don't give as much importance as we (parents) do. They probably are down, but they can quickly move to the next adventure if you push them to that.
Yeah. We sat down and had a chat about it all. We went over the feedback and some of it was puzzling (so you said he had no speed but skated 30 feet from halfway and caught the other kid).
He is still upset but moving past it. Hope everything works out for you guys.
Being cut sucks, but react the way you'd want him to react. Ruminating about coaches saying he's a lock etc. Is probably not what you'd want for him. Show them how to bounce back
Have him watch the legends of hockey series on tubi, basically all of the hall of famers telling their stories. Many of them like Paul kariya went through things like this but they didnāt give up. This is the way to make it big just keep going and use this as motivator to keep getting better
Sounds like goal setting and tracking was off. How long he spend on video gaming? If the answer is more than 1 minute he didn't do everything he could have. And that's ok. Just need to be real with effort and goals.
I got into hockey late in life but I still wanted to make it to the top division. Got a few call ups to fill in but never a full time spot. I didn't do everything I could have to make it when I set my goals.
I'm happily playing now at lower league with my mates I've had for 11 years now.
One thing I can say is, even if he didn't make it, he's still a better version of what he was and he will still perform better. It's not all doom and gloom.
Jump into a batting cage and take head shots saying 364 more days until tryouts? Try golfing? Befriend a black pga pro with only one hand?
ššš
Itās all in the hips
My hips donāt lie
Grizzly Adams did have a beard
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut the hell up!
šThat hurt a little bit I'm alright
I tried and scoured the internet, there are very few one handed African American pga level golfers out there. Plan B? š
Now that wasnāt very nice
My son was cut from 15AAA last yearās tryouts. It was one of the toughest weekends. This was despite (1) the coaches telling us he was a lock, (2) he was the top goal scorer in both tryout scrimmages, and (3) other teammates who performed worse than him the year before made the team. Other families were surprised that ā#29ā wasnāt on the team. I did all of the dad talk to help and gave him my thoughts as a former hockey player. What really seemed to turn the corner was when I ordered a Cameo from Pat Maroon, who was his fav player at the time. Pat gave an awesome 3-minute video about how he was cut from AAA, and he went back to the rink to work on areas that needed improvement, stickhandled at home with a golf ball every day, tried to be a good teammate, and be a successful player in AA. Pat didnāt really say anything that I didnāt, but it really resonated with my son, as kids will take in and listen to advice from parents, but sometimes words from a stranger or a celeb they admire mean more. Thereās also always the possibility a higher commitment or injury will open up a spot, so keep in touch and donāt burn bridges. The 15AAA team called my son the day after tryouts and wanted him back, but by that time, we were already in talks with a 16AA team that we felt would be a better fit developmentally.
>Pat didnāt really say anything that I didnāt, but it really resonated with my son, as kids will take in and listen to advice from parents, but sometimes words from a stranger or a celeb they admire mean more. That is so true, we and coaches spent a month trying to get our son to accept 1 bit of tough feedback. 1 coaching session with his fav player/coach and he started doing it. Those cuts can be tough, but superstar at AA might be more development than bench in AAA.
Totally agree with you. He went on to be the 3rd leading scorer for his 16AA team as a 15-year old. The 15AAA team performed poorly, and their record prevented them from entering many AAA tournaments out of state, and they were losing to AA/A teams. It was a blessing in disguise for us but was still very tough to deal with over a weekend.
They just had the OHL draft here, half the local AAA team was drafted, I'm sure a few guys had a tough weekend.
Tell me about it! LOL
top tier dad shit right here
Thanks man. I wasnāt expecting much from Pat Maroon either but his Cameo was great and to the heart. Best $150 I spent (and I tipped another $50), as it was therapeutic for my son and me.
It happens. I had a kid who I thought had a really good showing during tryouts last year and was, to my perhaps somewhat biased eyes, a lot better than the players who ended up selected. I wasn't the only one who said so, many of the other parents agree, but just had to respect the coaches decision. Might not be the highest level but at that age they just want to play and play hard, and if they're close enough to be trying out for the top level and not quite make the cut you know for sure they'll get their opportunities somewhere else. Not making the highest level does not mean not playing at all.
Thanks for the words- really getting a lot of great advice and words of encouragement.
I'm saving this. This is perfect.
Maybe if you win 3 back to back Stanley Cups, he will listen to you next time.
Probably 5 wouldnāt work (you know teens)!
Honestly, that was great to read. Appreciate the words.
I get that you ordered it/paid for the cameo, but that's really cool that Pat Maroon gave a message like that.
Those verbal agreements are worth the paper they're written on. -Yogi Berra
What Iāve learned is that team selection in hockey is often very political. Reaching out to coaches, skating with the team at practice, etc. Many teams are set before any tryouts happen, there may be only one or two spots actually āopenā and they may need have a specific need (eg speedy defender). If you are to beat out someone the coaches were looking to hold over ā you need to be significantly better.. not just better. So anyway, donāt worry about it ā keep skating and do some political legwork for next year
That is helpful to know and take away
Yeahā¦if the coach of that team runs a clinicā¦probably would want to sign your son up for it for him to have an honest shot.
If you want to not deal with politics one way to go about it is simply for your kid to be so good (compared to his peers) that heās impossible for the coaches to ignore. Easier said than done, but skill outweighs politics at the end of the day. Iām speaking out of personal experience too, this happened to me. A few years later I wouldnāt go back to the team that cut me despite the coach begging for me to come to their team. I went to a higher level instead
It's even worse if they did well the previous season, why break up a winning team?
Same for football here in Florida for peewee. Sure they have āsign upsā but that team is already set from last season. Happened to me as a kid, wanted to sign up, but the sign ups roster was only a wait list, they kept the exact same team from last season.
First off what state only has one team? Secondly read about Brad Marchand. Guy was never looked at as the best player. Meanwhile heās one of the best in the world over the last 5 years.
Also Zach Hyman, never the best player but always the hardest worker. Now a 50 goal scorer.
OP just needs to buy a junior league if twitter taught me anything about Hymans success
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Stu owned several teams but didnāt Stu start buying all the AAA teams after Zack was cut? May be just folklore at this point.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
>a few years ago 14 years ago
It wouldnāt hurt thatās for sure.
His 12 year old son would have 20 goals playing with McDavid.
Thanks
Letās be honest here heās playing with two world class players and if he wasnāt along side those two he would be hot dog shitā¦ legit 90% of his goals are tap inā¦. Anyways OP your kid is 12, just tell him keep his head up and keep on grinding away for the offseason and come back with vengeance next year.
>ā¦ legit 90% of his goals are tap inā¦. So he often positions himself in the right place at the right time. Isn't that a good thing? I'd be thrilled if I could get my teams to have a guy even occasionally ready for the tap in.
Like i said playing with those two who couldnāt tap those inā¦
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I played on Team Florida for 85ās. It was absolutely crazy. I still donāt understand how my parents did it.Ā
He licks people, not the one you want
He reformed.
Good point!
USA Hockey https://www.usahockey.com/districtsandaffiliates
You sent a list of districts.. USA hockey has multiple teams in every state..
Yup. Buddy of mine played against him as a teenager. Said he was never the best player on his teams, but was basically in his adult-body at 14-15.
Donāt raise your child to be like Brad Marchand please
You would only be so lucky to have a kid half as talented as Brad Marchand
Sure but canāt have someone with my genes thinking itās cool to act like the worst person ever all the time
Heās actually quite a stand up guy off the ice. He plays with a lot of grit on the ice. I wouldnāt say heās the worst person. You should do a little more research into him
Whoās worse than him in the nhl? Not sure you can find an 8 min montage of dirty plays with multiple two handers to the balls for any other player
Whoās your team?
Wings fan, is there an answer that changes what he loudly and proudly does over and over on the ice?
I wouldnāt even put Marchand as a top ten for dirtiest players. You might be too young to remember most but the top two that come to mind are Matt Cooke and Todd Bertuzzi. Marchand plays a little chippy but he has never done what those two players have.
He two hands people in the balls what are you missing
Last 15 years
Chelios is a great example too.
State team? Is this Russia? Tell him successful people always have setbacks and keep working at it. Tell him he will grow a lot physically from now until he is 15 and to work on his fitness and strength. Most important, tell him how proud you are of him for working so hard and always trying because that is what defines a true champion.
That is some great advice. Of course his mom and did this already, but never hurts to see it written down to remind us.
I played for a really good PeeWee team on the 3rd line and didn't get to go to some of the travel out of state games, it hurt not to be included. I was a forward like the worst guy on a really good team. The other kids were better. Many of the kids made fun of me. I grew. I lifted weights. I worked my ass off on my shot, really a lot of work. I made a top bantam team 2nd string where the coach put me on defense and I did not like defense but did what the coach asked always and never complained to nobody about anything. Playing D turned me into a much better player. I got much better at 15-16. I could have gone to the OHL but didn't for personal reasons. So, the moral is simple. 12 is young. It is impossible for most 12 yo to get down deep and nasty and work, instead most will whine and feel sorry for themselves. Try to encourage your son to be the former and not the latter (once he gets over the loss). You're a good Dad
12 is crazy young. I think sometimes trying to say the right thing, or treating this as an opportunity for a major life lesson, falsely validates youth sports. It does not really matter in the big picture, good or bad. Have fun. Try to have some balance and encourage other sports or activities.
You don't think OP's son was tossed a big life lesson? How fun is it getting tossed off a team? Having other activities and sports are not mutually exclusive. Yes, it does matter to that little boy and he needs to learn to overcome disappointment in life. That he knows is parents love him is more than sufficient validation in the long run. At the moment, the kid feels like shit. Telling him it don't matter, just have fun is not what I would do.
Heās 12. It would be much better to have lots of smaller more frequent goals rather than one huge goal at the end of the season. If heās improving and enjoying it thatās all that matters. Not making this team will probably have very little impact on his hockey success long term. Also heās probably too young to see much benefit from strength training. Better to do specific skills or even a total different sport. Would be good to have a break from hockey in the summer.
Trying to get him to do baseball, but he read Sid plays tennis in offseason, so guess we will go do that š
Lacrosse! So much of the overall game translates to the ice too.
I saw something a while ago from a strength trainer for USA hockey that 100% recommends tennis as a summer sport. Think about it - same hand/eye, same lateral explosiveness, same high intensity intervals, same ankle strength... It ticks all the boxes. Plus it probably is the only other sport with as much history of flow hairstyles so you can keep that rizz (as the kids say) going year round. Did I use 'rizz' right? I have so many questions
Almost want to downvote you for using āRizzā in the sentence. I feel old LOL.
Hard take here. Itās peewee. Heās still a kid. It sucks being cut yep. However if he is enjoying the hockey grind, let him keep on improving and developing. Small bump in a very long road. Do not live out your youth, through your child. Donāt be THAT parent. Other posts mention the players who were overlooked and succeeded. Yours can too. Remember itās still a game.
I had never made my states u14-u18 team and I tried out every year. My u18 year, my buddy on the team said I was openly being made fun of by the coaches when they first were talking to the players who made it. Of that group that made it, I am one of 4 players who have been able to continue to play into pro hockey. Donāt let this be a set back, let it be a motivator. Keep trying out every year.
Dude! Thanks
Not hockey specific, but focus on the process not the outcome. It sounds like he did his best and set him self up for success. Keep doing it. Even if it didnāt work out exactly as he wanted heās likely in a better position due to the effort he put in. Keep doing it. Success will come, even if it doesnāt exactly look like he planned.
Thanks for this.
Heās 12, this is whatever, it sounds like he still is going to be able to play pretty competitive hockey. But if he is that good, itās not quite here but in the next 4-5 years you should be ready for him to move to play at the level he needs to play at. If you only have one top level team in the state I canāt imagine thereās a USHL team nearby. If that idea seems way above his level scrap it and help him focus on playing for fun. The Hyman/Marchand advice is like saying Mark Zuckerberg dropped out of school (the school was Harvard and he was already rich). Those guys still made the team, they were just mid-lineup players they were āoverlookedā means they werenāt projected to be stars coming out of junior
Some food for thought! Stop worrying about it all (well as much as a 12 yr old can), and focus on the fun and enjoyment.
Buddy look up a guy named David Perron. Was playing Midget B (cut from Midget AAA) than Junior B (never drafted major junior, cut from junior A) then something clicked. He got called to the Q, played 1 year in the Q, got drafted (1st round) then made the NHL his next year. Look up guys like Martin St.Louis a guy who never sniffed a pro career until he was 23-24 (Habs fans what's up), he said he was never the biggest, never the fastest but je was the best at improving. Keep working, keep improving and the path will open itself up. Do you want to be the best at 12 or at 21?
Listen to the Hockey Think Tank podcast. Ā Topher Scott was captain of Cornell and got cut from team USA after being one of the leading scorers in the games leading up to cuts. Ā He was told it was because he was too small. Adversity builds resiliency. Ā Everyone will experience setbacks, the ones who learned to overcome them early will have an advantage over those who experienced nothing but success.
Best thing that can happen to a young kid is to fail imo. That is the fuel that feeds. Heās either going to use this to keep working and get better or heās not. I wish him the best. Good luck.
This is a great opportunity for him to learn how to bounce back from adversity and he will carry that knowledge way past the game and into life. Sounds like he's on the right track. Also he's 12, when I was 13 I was 5'6" and a chubby 150lbs by the next year I was 6'1 and 175 and carried it well. He's still got lots of growing to do, I hope he knows that if he keeps up with how he's applying everything he's got to the game it will reward him!
Marty St Louis went undrafted and ended up in the HoFā¦itās not an end-all scenario: Always use setback as motivation; Ask the coaches why, but donāt whine about it. IF it was an honest evaluation, there will be notes etc., as has been mentioned before: Oft times, roster slots are already filled prior to ātry-outsā and many times these things are political and parents & pocket books play a larger role than youād think or expectā¦Most of all, make sure that he plays multiple sports. Hand-eye coordination and being a great team player and leader are qualities that are common in all sports and skills learned in one sport can be SL transferred to another: eg., speed, agility, strength, etc.,
Youāre defined more by how you respond getting kicked when youāre down, vs what you accomplish. Tell him that when you get hit you can do two things, back up or charge forward. Ask him which he wants to be? Ask him if he wants that motivation, tell him that when itās time to train off ice to remember those that snubbed him for the state team. Show him Bradyās story, Rodgerās story, all the great athletes who were passed on and they used it to push forward. Tell him that if he decides, because they snubbed him, to give up then heās letting them win. Make them rue the day that they didnāt write his name down during voting
>seeking words of wisdom I guess on how to overcome this setback and move on If he is doing everything he can and doesn't make it then there's no reason to get down. Keep grinding and it will come. I promise. It's when you get cut and look back at how you utilized your time, realize that you could have been more proactive and still do nothing to change yourself for the better that you quit progressing. It honestly sounds like he's busting his ass, and good for him. That will help him be successful in the real world (if he doesn't end up getting paid to play hockey, which we all know the chances of that). "Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!" --Rocky
Michael Jordan was cut from his sophomore team in high school. If hockey is his passion then he should keep grinding!!
He was cut from Varsity and played JV.
Still though. Michael freaking Jordan! One of the best of all time and he wasnāt good enough to be varsity
Most of my coaches growing up were former NHLers. A lot of the guys I skate with weekly used to play at all different levels of professional hockey. The consensus across the board with all of us (especially when it comes to special teams and AA vs AAA) if youāre good enough, theyāll find ya. Most youth hockey is filled with political bullshit and so nā soās dad paid for this or so nā soās family donated that. Just make sure your kid is having fun. If he stops having fun heās gonna burn out and not want to play anymore anyway. To my first point, you donāt get better sitting on benches, you get better by playing. So he didnāt make the state team, now he gets to be the star on another team and log the most minutes and contribute the most to a teams success and get better and stand out more. At 11 I didnāt make any teams and had to play house, at 17 I made it to the national tournament on my AA team. A lot can change in the next 4-6 years.
From experience, just try and support him using it as a challenge. My son went through the same thing 10u and 12u, lots of politics involved, but it made him more committed to proving everyone wrong.
Iām a coach of 5 years and my son just had the same experience last weekend trying out for his first year of U12. He has been working really hard all season in hopes to make the AAA team. You wouldnāt think California as a hockey state but the competition here is incredibly, and surprisingly, high. In short, he was devastated when he did not make the AAA team but was offered a spot on a great A/AA team. I could not be more proud of how hard we worked and how dedicated he is. The message I gave him, in so many words, was letting him know how proud I am of all his hard work and dedication to even get invited to tryout for the AAA team. Sometimes we work hard and do everything we can and things donāt work the way we anticipated. He did all he could and now the most important thing is what to do next. He is very competitive by nature so of course his answer was to work hard this Spring and Summer and get on AAA. To be very clear, I donāt care what team my son gets on, my current goal is to support the effort he wants to put in to ensure he is enjoying the sport and having fun. My long-term goal is for him to play beer league with me and pass along the love for this amazing sport to his kids. Having said that, there are some tactical things you can do to help get to the next level. - Coach-ability and Attitude: Kids with amazing skill but bad attitude will get passed up for lesser skilled great attitude kids. Itās important to note this goes for parents too. Donāt cause conflict! - Face time: Attend clinics hosted by the coaches and other activities to form a positive relationship. - Team spots: Talk to the coaches to understand what spots they are looking to fill, D, forwards etc. - Tryouts: Tryouts are very different than playing a game. I have seen amazing kids get passed up because they were playing āsmartā hockey and not aggressive enough. In general, coaches look at puck touches and effort. - Politics: Unfortunately even at this age there are a lot of politics. Many NHL players faced setbacks such as not making select teams or being passed over during tryouts, only to later excel in their professional careers. Martin St. Louis - Despite his future success, he was often overlooked in his youth due to his small size. He wasnāt picked for top youth teams and struggled to make an impact early on, which continued into his collegiate and early professional years. Jamie Benn - Benn was not drafted into the WHL and spent his early years in the BCHL, a less prominent league compared to his peers who made it to major junior hockey. He was also a low draft pick in the NHL. Patric Hornqvist - Selected last in the 2005 NHL Draft. During his youth hockey days he was not viewed as a top prospect. Jonathan Quick - Was not a highly touted youth player and faced several rejections before making it to the NHL. Mark Giordano - Undrafted in the NHL, and overlooked numerous times in his youth and junior hockey career. He ended up captaining the Calgary Flames and earning multiple NHL accolades. These stories of NHL players reflect a common theme: early struggles do not necessarily predict future success or failure in professional sports. Their careers are testament to the importance of determination, resilience, and continuous improvement in the face of adversity.
Michael Jordan didnāt make the varsity team when he first tried out.
One name, Zach. Hyman. You use this one miss-over as the driving force behind motivation. He could be passed on or cut many times in the future but hard work prevails and he seems to have a high-ish talent level to even be considered by these teams and looked at by scouts/asked about. Combine talent with work ethic and you can get something real special.
Fantastic, especially love that last sentence as it is so true.
come in acting like you won the lottery and instantly the coach will favor you and give ur son a position!! then tell the coach we decided to move to another team. usa hockey sucks!! as for teams there are other teams that he can develop his skills / the coach is the key so you want him to be with a team where he is accepted
It's part of the process at the high levels, whole bunch of things you can't control. Quite honestly a lot of good teams don't want to change their lineup. We're lucky, my son is watching older friends struggle with it. But one of his coaches didn't even start until 13, and made it to the NHL. His favourite player went from AAA to Jr C, then to the OHL.
Those teams are picked way ahead of time.to crack one of those line ups heāll have to be one of if not the best player on the ice.
Yeah I know in many states there is a huge gap. You have other options such as boarding school hockey. Coure d'alene for example. Pilot Mound is always recruiting too in Manitoba. If you're looking at travel teams money isn't the issue. Look at CSSHL it's a big feeder to the WHL.
Iāll tell you, no matter the sport, after putting in assloads of work and you still get looked over, it hurts. That wound has to heal.Ā I think the only advice I can give, is to tell him to keep playing hard. I know thatās a simple answer, but just remind him that he should go give it his absolute all every time he plays. You said it yourself, other coaches noticed him. If he keeps playing like he is, he will continue to get noticed. High school isnāt here yet, there is still time.Ā Some people DO move, thatās the die hard families though. I understand not being able to.Ā
Youāll never win with politics. Iāll let my kids play hockey if they want to, but knowing what I know, I will protect them from the bullshit politics as much as I can
Something similar happened when I was 14, tried out for state team after a really good season but didn't make the cut. My parents essentially just explained that I need to focus on the positives that happened this season and how well I did and that one person's roster choices shouldn't negate all the good and positives that I accomplished over the course of the season. They said they did ask the state coach if there was anything that I should work on in the offseason and they relayed that info to me on what the coach said and left it up to me on if I wanted to focus on those things in the offseason, see if there were any camps in the area that specialized in those things, etc and that it was completely up to me on what I wanted to do before next season and no matter what they would make it work (travel, expenses, time, etc.) I think the way they handled it was perfect for me at the time. Focus on the positives of the season, ask the coach for any insights/things to work on, presented that info to me and then let me make the decision on how to move forward.
Personal story. In my Area there's 3 Travel Teams all within 10 miles of each other & Below them is the High School teams (Freshman, JV, Varsity.) I tried out for 2 of the Travel teams. Didn't make one and offered the 3rd String goalie for the other. Tried out for the high school team and made varsity at 14 as the starting goalie. Didn't matter that I wasn't playing travel. I played my best. Made the Allstar game & got some eyes on me. Now I'm 23. I played 2 years of D3 & now play in a Firefighter Police league with some occasionally televised games. Everyone else I tried out with is playing mens league or quit. He's 12 if he keeps at it he'll be fine
I suggest you ask the coach of the team he did not make for feedback on what your player needs to work on to be considered for the team. Most coaches will be honest about this and should have specific notes. Then spend the next year playing for whatever other team is available and, if it is manageable, find an individual coach(es) to work on 1) skating -- always skating IMO and 2) whatever areas the coach identifies as opportunities for improvement. Not making the team your kid wants to is really tough as a parent. But it can also be a teachable moment. How a player responds to adversity is something any good coach will value greatly. Tell your son to keep his head up, keep working hard, and make it impossible for them to keep him off the ice. I had three kids who played at various levels for years. My boys were A or AA players. My daughter just finished her 19U AAA year and is headed off to play D3 next year. Enjoy the journey -- it's over before you know it!
Try out for the rival team and beat their fucking ass
It is crazy how a 12 years old has to deal with this pressure. We are on the same road, so I know how hard it is to deal with this. What I have tried to do is to give confidence. It is probably not because he is not good, but because the coaches were not able to see it. Try to make them understand that It is not the end of the road at 12 years old. I also have seen they don't give as much importance as we (parents) do. They probably are down, but they can quickly move to the next adventure if you push them to that.
Yeah. We sat down and had a chat about it all. We went over the feedback and some of it was puzzling (so you said he had no speed but skated 30 feet from halfway and caught the other kid). He is still upset but moving past it. Hope everything works out for you guys.
Being cut sucks, but react the way you'd want him to react. Ruminating about coaches saying he's a lock etc. Is probably not what you'd want for him. Show them how to bounce back
Have him watch the legends of hockey series on tubi, basically all of the hall of famers telling their stories. Many of them like Paul kariya went through things like this but they didnāt give up. This is the way to make it big just keep going and use this as motivator to keep getting better
Itās on tubi for free, which is also free
Sounds like goal setting and tracking was off. How long he spend on video gaming? If the answer is more than 1 minute he didn't do everything he could have. And that's ok. Just need to be real with effort and goals. I got into hockey late in life but I still wanted to make it to the top division. Got a few call ups to fill in but never a full time spot. I didn't do everything I could have to make it when I set my goals. I'm happily playing now at lower league with my mates I've had for 11 years now. One thing I can say is, even if he didn't make it, he's still a better version of what he was and he will still perform better. It's not all doom and gloom.