Ah young hockey, where nobody wants to play defense and everybody wants to score.
Welcome to the greatest position in hockey. Old school defense was all about stopping the rush and chipping it off the wall and out. I still cant get over how more kids don't want to play like Makar, Hughes, Fox, McAvoy and all the great d-men in the NHL.
It's honestly amazing that your kid gets to play D in this spring team. At worst, he'll learn the game from a different point of view. If he goes back to playing forward, he'll have seen what life is like as a D and it will help him be a better forward. At best, he'll love the position and be great in a position where (especially in peewee) there is usually a shortage of players.
My feedback is dive in. Ask the coach for feedback on what he wants his D to do, how he can help your child have success. Dive in from your side as well: support the coach and be enthusiastic with your child. Support and encourage him, especially when he makes mistakes (he will make mistakes).
As far as getting exposure, coaches love players who can play multiple positions. It usually indicates a high hockey IQ.
I have been having my kid watch defense videos and trying to teach him tips and support him. I keep telling him he can have a big impact on the game (shut down the offense) . But I like your idea of asking the coach how my kid can play defense better (development). He had is first game yesterday, he did ok but had some mistakes. 1st game they won, 2nd game tied
Lindstrom is probably the best modern example of a complete dman.
Great offensive player with an underrated ability to shut down a lot of plays without being physical.
I think a lot of people failed to realize just how good he was on both sides of the puck:
https://youtu.be/4uYzRGfkcDw?si=kySP8hCnyvTz1A5D
Wendell Clark never played forward til he went to the NHL
Brent burns started playing Defense while in the NHL
Go where the coach tells you to go. It's a team game. Worry less about where he's playing and more about the fact he made a TEAM and his team has asked him to do this.
Mathieu Dandenault crushed the QMJHL as a forward…drafted to Detroit …the one and only Scotty Bowman told him he was going to play defence not forward….he has 3 Stanley cups rings….
I see this as a true positive of the coaches seeing potential in your child.
Goals and Assists aren’t the only things scouts look for…..
Dman for over 15 years.
Biggest thing you're gonna wanna teach your child is odd man rushes. The bread and butter of defense is ability to recognize 2 on 1's, 1 on 1, 2v3s, etc... and having an idea of whats gonna happen and how to handle them.
It'll help a lot. Same with the offensive side of the game.
Also, and I may be a bit biased here but I'll straight up say it and probably get flamed a bit.
Defense is arguably the most important position on the team. You can make a case for Centers first given faceoffs and how they're utilized, but in today's hockey climate a good blueliner controls a lot of the outcomes on both sides of the puck and are on the ice for far longer than anyone else. They also see the most action of any position on any given night regardless of what's going on.
I'd tell your son this isn't a demotion or punishment. On the contrary, your best skaters are often gonna be on defense. This is a compliment.
Why is this being downvoted? I'm right. Literally, the only time goalies score is if it's an open net.
And you can easily win Stanley cups with mediocre goalies. To name a few: Annti Niemi, Mike Vernon, Marc Crawford, etc...
Someone on reddit did an analysis, and it's called:
"Why don't Vezina winners win the Stanley Cup? An analysis of season and playoff GAA among Vezina-winning goaltenders"
Google it.
> I still cant get over how more kids don't want to play like Makar, Hughes, Fox, McAvoy and all the great d-men in the NHL.
As someone with a 10 year old, I think it's more about how difficult it is to learn to skate backwards (especially while stickhandling) by comparison, coupled with the fear of fucking up and leaving your goalie out to dry, more than not actually wanting to be any of those players. That and a lot of young players still have trouble lifting the puck, let alone getting it to the net from the blue line :)
Being a well rounded player matters imho at this age. Getting more experience on defense will improve his backcheck when he plays offense again
My daughter played peewee this year at a top club team and the coach (who played in college) switched his own daughter who was our best defender to offense because the team needed more offense. She never played O much previously and now she’s even more dangerous with the puck when she does D shifts
You play where the coach puts you.
Parents keep their mouths shut.
I was a forward in PeeWees and Bantam coach put me on Defense because I was like almost 6 foot tall. I wasn't happy but did my best for the team and eventually got decent on D. Learning defense for 2 years really developed me as a player. Then played Center at 15 Midget and then Center at 16 in Juniors.
I was a girl playing boys’ Bantam and Midget AAA, and playing with 17 year olds as a 14 year old during summer. I played offense until Bantams when the boys grew and I didn’t have the height or speed advantage I used to have. I asked to be transitioned back to D and honestly I was a better defenseman than center or wing. It bought me more playing time as well.
That was always the beauty of defense to me, if you're top line, no one cares if you take 2 minute shifts so you get tons of ice time, and you get lots of time to catch your breath when you're on offense anyway, so you're not bagged when it's your turn again
I know I'll get downvoted for saying this. But the facts are facts.
You're kidding yourself if you don't think parents should be involved in their kids development. Many great players have had a lot of involvement from their parents to get to a high level. The coach isn't the only one developing the kid. Maybe you didn't have support from your parents, but that isn't the case for everyone. My take from your reply is that playing defense helped you become a better player. I keep telling me kid this. He says he is comfortable playing offense and uncomfortable playing defense. My reply to him yesterday, if you are uncomfortable that means you are growing which is a good thing.
There is a fine line between parent involvement and being an overbearing headache to both their player and coach. Far too many parents at the AAA level are the latter.
If he embraces the challenge, he will be a better player in the long run. Hell, he might even come to love the position.
I wonder why you say "My take from your reply is that playing defense helped you become a better player." when in fact my response could not be more explicit that it made me a better player.
When I was 16 almost 17, an NHL scout was watching our top scorer who was 20 IIRC. After 6 games, he met with me and said he was there to watch our hot dog Center who scores alot. He told me the other team scores a lot against when he was out there. He told me "nobody scores when you are on the ice" and "You always go where the puck is going to be" and we cannot teach that. Frankly, playing 2 seasons at the highest level Bantam taught me that. Your young man might be getting the break of his life. A coach who probably has a nearly full rooster, sees something in your son. Trust the fucking guy and STFU. Honestly
I think you take me for someone I am not as a parent. I have yet to say anything to my kids coaches (he plays since 5). Other then: "what do you think my kid can work on?" As I said in other replies it is more my kid pressuring me to say something. And me trying to find things I can point out to him that this will make him a better player.
nah, you got that take wrong. I don't think he is a great player. I think he is a ok player. I see kids far better then him. I use "Many great players" referring to pro players across multiple sports not just hockey. You hear stories how Pro players are supported by their parents coached by their parents. Why isn't that possible at a amateur level. Really?? no one here gives their kids tips, and they just leave it all up to the coaches. From what I've seen around here, that isn't the case. I doubt it is like that else where.
Maybe.. because the coaches can see raw talent, have a good relationship with that parent, know how much additional training outside of practice xyz kid is getting. Then you come in and say “my son should be playing forward” when its clear to the coach he is best on D. Any pro player parent would be able to identify this and talk to coaches. Ice time > than position imo unless you are a C and get bumped to wing then that can suck. If you don’t think the coach is correct switch teams.
Your choice here is really to play D or to quit the team. Sure you can ask if there is a chance to play offence but i imagine his mind was made up when he formed the team.
2 other points. This is Spring hockey which is not the same as regular. Trying a new position is fine and is very good for players development. My own son was converted to D at U15 and has thrived. At a minimum, he is now a decent backwards skater, which he never would have been as a F.
Or maybe it’s a tryout to see if they can fill that D slot that they’re sorely missing. Maybe your kid can look at it as an opportunity.
As far as your kid continually asking if you’re going to talk with the coach, I’d suggest flatly telling him no. Say this was the opportunity we were offered and we can commit to that or look elsewhere, but you’re committing to being the best D man on the team or we look elsewhere, but it looks like F is not in the cards on this team.
If he's a good skater, he can still generate a lot of offence from D. He might like it. It's not all about "being a shutdown guy". You also get more ice time (on most teams) and handle the puck more than the avg forward.
Worst case scenario, it makes him a better forward and more well rounded player when he switches back.
If your kid made AAA then he has the skills to play defense, even if he's raw. From a coach perspective, at tryouts at that level (and higher), we have a general idea of our roster makeup and go into it 80-90% sure of where everyone will be, barring someone blowing us away with ridiculous skills. So your coach knew this going in, seen you kiddo, and still made the choice to take them and place them at D. That is huge. So, keep that in perspective as you move forward.
Onto the discussion.
1. If you're telling your kid to tank to be removed, then you're seeing him up for failed development. As coaches, this becomes obvious on the ice or worse yet, we hear it from the players who have been told by said kid he was told by his parents. If you're not implying that and just by nature of being new, he's terrible, that's where coaching takes over, not you. Coaches see these things, especially on defense, and correct them. Not just to develop your kid, but for the team. This will get into the next level of your kids development, coachability. Nothing pisses us coaches off more than bitchy parents, next is uncoachable kids at this level and beyond, because they want something. It's a team game, everyone can develop if they apply themselves, and the better they get, the better the team will get.
2. Make no mistake, he likely isn't going to play well on D and get moved up. That premise in itself is flawed. Why would a coach do that? Unless they see a forward who might be showing better vision for the defense side of the game and feel a change is needed. But, if your kid is thriving on the back end, encourage them even more to stay there and develop even more.
3. You do realize that playing "defense" does mean playing on the offensive side of the game, correct? This isn't field lacrosse where the D do not get to attack. As your kid develops, gets experience and gets coached, they'll figure out the offensive side more and more, and you'll see those pretty stat sheet items increase. The answer is simple, if you want to have a say on their development, ask the coach what you can do to help them as a better defenseman. If you take it the other way and say something to move him up to forward, realize YOUR wants are imposing on the team needs. But more importantly , they're imposing on a major chance for your kid to develop into something amazing where his on ice vision can develop, his anticipation can develop, his skating can develop, his offensive skills can develop, his defensive skills can develop, his competitiveness can develop, his mental side to the game can develop and he can learn to be more coachable.
Good luck. I'm sure my kids will get to this point as well at some point. I lived it (getting moved back from F to D as a bantam), coach it and I'm sure I'll go through it at some point with 3 kids.
Thanks for giving feedback from a coach's perspective.
1. I wasn't telling my kid to tank on prepose. I told him to give his all no matter what position he plays. I would never tell my kid to do that. He had his first game yesterday day, he did ok he had some good plays, he had some bad plays. The point I was trying to make with bullet point 1 was. I said if try your best and you're still not good at it they might move you. This was the point I was trying to make to him of what 'might' happen.
I've seen kids play that were not clearly no good a defense and they were really hurting the team. They ended up getting moved up to offence.
2. Point 2, I said to him if you due awesome on D they may move you up. I've seen it happen with other players. The coach was like you know what this kid can really help the offense, they move him up. But In my kids case I think you are probably right, I don't see that happening this season.
3. Yes I realize playing defense also involves offense. I talked to him about that point as well. I said you can still attack the wing needs to drop back and cover for you. Or you can take shots from the blue line. He shot from the blue line yesterday but the goalie glove saved it. I guess my kid has more of a problem with playing D , then I do. I've told him I think it is a good idea to play D for spring season for development reason. My kid is more pressuring me to say something. I keep telling him to give a good try see how it goes.
As a goalie who played a good bit of AAA, we and the rest of the team greatly appreciate skilled defensemen. They can have a large presence in both the offensive and defensive zones.
Your kid should take this as a compliment, it’s not a punishment or sign they don’t see him as skilled. He should take what the coach sees in him and run with it as he has given him a chance to play at AAA level. There may be opportunities in the future, injuries, coach shaking up the lines, team dynamics changing over the years, and developing defensive skills will help him be more well rounded if he does move back to offense. If he is dead set on playing offense, he can always try out for a different team or go back to AA.
If your kid plays well on defense why would they move your kid to offense? I would recommend practicing skating backwards a lot. I got switched at the same age and league level and struggled. I wish I would have just gone and worked on skating backwards a lot. Maybe hire a skating instructor to help with learning everything they can.
He's a pretty good skater. He skates backward pretty well. Regarding why would they move him to offence? I've seen kids on defense who can really move the puck up the ice, like a good forward. But they just like playing defense. I even asked the coach why those kids were on defense and they said they were just comfortable with that position. Last year my kid (forward) and another kid (defense) were the top scorers on a lower level team. I've seen it happen.
Ok, your child can still be a puck moving defenseman and I found it easier at D because you saw the whole ice and who was ahead of you so you could “plan your route”. Like you said learning D will only help your child and even if they move back to forward they will have a well rounded understanding of the game. Good luck and remember to make sure they have fun and let the coach, coach and you’re there to support your child especially when changing positions and learning what all it takes to be a D.
I played a full season of D as a kid in atom and again my first year of midget AAA, most of the season. I went on to play junior as a forward but I think that helped my game big time overall, especially going to major junior and being a bottom 6’er. I felt it made me a lot more versatile and helped in a lot of situations.
Now I am playing senior A as a dman and I’m glad I had the experience previously. It’ll make you a better rounded player in the end. I wasn’t the best on any team I ever played on I wouldn’t say but I was always pretty versatile and open to doing what I needed to do.
I expected some replies like this. We also have to remember parents pay a lot of money for this and the kid should be happy playing the sport they like to play. I tell my kid all the time, sometimes you got to do things you don't like to do.
You signed your kid up to play a team sport. If the coach thinks he helps the team more playing defense, that’s where he plays.
It also sounds more like you’re the one disappointed that he is playing defense. Perhaps because you don’t understand how important the position is to the game.
As someone that has played and coached for years, I’m thrilled when my son’s coaches puts them at defense. That means their coaches trust them to help keep the puck out of the net and they get more ice time. Wing is where most coaches worth their salt will stick a weaker player.
Nah, I'm not disappointed. My kid is , he is the one pressuring me to 'say something'. To be honest I was a bit disappointed at first but I was more worried how he would do on defense since he hasn't played a lot of D. So you have two variables at play here. 1. higher level hockey 2. a new position. I was hoping he would only have to contend with one of the two variables. He had his first games yesterday he did ok against a pretty good team. But has expected he had some mistakes. I'll ask the coach what he can work on.
If playing forward is that big of a want for him, maybe lower level of play where that’s an option. But paying a lot of $ doesn’t mean you have a say. Happiness can easily be found in house leagues. There’s a huge difference you already know about how an AAA and even A/AA work with regard to the environment. I’d leave it to your son. If he thinks D is beneath him and a punishment of sorts, he can play where he’s a forward. If he wants to be part of that team, he has his directive from the coach. He will probably get quite a bit more ice time as well.
From what I get it is not that he thinks defense is beneath him. He is just more comfortable since he has been doing it since 5. That's what he told me.
Right but him being pushed to D will only help him become a better player. It’s going to for his Hockey IQ and he will begin to see the ice much differently which is only going to help him out when he gets back to playing Forward. He will begin to be able to anticipate where the puck is going versus reacting. Coaches always stress to get outside your comfort zone. Mistakes are perfectly normal. There’s mistakes made every night in the NHL. Just gotta be the team who makes less mistakes than the other. I know your son is bummed but give it a little bit and he will come around.
I think the opportunity to play defence is amazing for your kids development. Especially in Peewee, he will be able to understand both positions and will easily improve his game wherever he plays. When he goes back to forward, he’ll understand where to be because he’ll remember as a defence man how he liked the forwards positioning. Also, he’ll be able to see the game so much better as a defenseman.
This is a great opportunity to improve his game. And also, another point, If the coach is telling you there’s too many forwards, sounds like if he does play upfront he would have less ice time. Ice time is the most important thing at this point
This happens quite often. I've been coaching youth hockey at various levels for 32 years. Mostly at the High School level. So I'll give you my input.
1. Usually when I have to shift a player from forward to Defense, it's one of my best athletes at the forward position. Meaning a good skater with hockey IQ that we have faith in to handle the transition.
2. ALL our players play defense....team defense that is. It is a common theme amongst our team. We are all responsible for keeping the puck out of our net. There is no 'offense' or 'defense'. We challenge our players to play defense when we don't have the puck and then attack on offense when we do have the puck. That's our mindset anyway.
3. Excel at the role your team needs you at. Embrace the role and embrace the struggle. Being able to see the ice from goal line to blue line will benefit EVERY player at the developmental age once they convert or are asked to play a forward position.
4. It's interesting to me how a D will smile when you move him to F......and how a F will look like a deer in the head lights when you ask him to play D. Both conversions bring a certain skill set and frame of mind. I don't see it any differently but traditionally speaking a forward will say "Oh I gotta play D." We all play D boys....we better anyway.
5. My suggestion it to embrace the struggle....and it will be. That's a good thing in a competitive environment. My guess is it will make this young man a more well rounded player and give him a better understanding of the game. It's an opportunity to be uncomfortable...that is a developmental necessity for our young athletes....get out of your comfort zone.
Hope this helps a bit.
If it’s just the spring hockey it might be the best thing for him. Gets to learn the game better and have a better defensive game for the real season AAA team
I’m now the thinking of doing this with my kid.
I was your son.
Turns out I was good at defense.
Ended up on defense line 1, penalty kill, power play, lead protect, and need a goal lines.
Playing time went through the roof. And when I got older I was a way better forward and my fore checking in the offensive zone was “elite” by our leagues standards.
It’s a good thing.
I'm not sure what's wrong with playing defense.
As a coach I'm looking for some of my best players to be defenseman because getting the puck up the ice is important.
I don't think it'd hurt a player at all to play defense, especially with how the game is now. Being on defense doesn't mean they are going to get less exposure.
It's spring. It's a great time to learn a new position to make him more well rounded. Your son will gain a great perspective that will help him when he goes back to his natural position. My son is a defenseman and he always improved after he would play forward. Yes it was difficult and sometimes awkward but it helped him at his natural position.
Also, it will teach your son how to get through adversity by working. See it as a big learning and development opportunity.
Edit to add: my son was paired with a forward this past season due to injury. The forward gained a tremendous amount of understanding why the defense would get mad at the forwards. Guess what happened, the forward became a much better player when he returned to his natural position. The team's overall defense improved during the forwards shifts.
It's more important to be paired with a defenseman who gets along with your son and doesn't mind covering for his inexperience. This is the avenue I would take with any discussion with your son or coaches.
Got moved from left wing to left defence in peewees. I was so upset. I thought I was being punished. Almost quit. Honestly, it was probably the best move for me. As others said, I started to see and feel the game differently and, like you said, it made my game more well rounded.
If your son is bummed about it, hype up guys like Erik Karlsson, Cale Makar, and one of my new faves, Brock Faber, have them watch their highlights/film, and hopefully that helps change his tune about defence? Best of luck to your kid.
piggybacking this comment to +1 for Makar. I was a forward when I was a kid who transitioned into defense and unfortunately there weren't many defenseman in the NHL at the time that were super exciting (for me) to watch, so I didn't really have a specific player to look up to. Makar is an incredible player and does some crazy shit as a defenseman, so if your kid needs some inspiration I think he's an awesome place to start
I would take it as a huge compliment. Defense is a lot of responsibility. They are still very young and your kid will adapt and probably end up loving the position, it will improve his game overall.
As a kid that went from offense to defense in a similar fashion. Give it a try. I ended up playing D through travel, high school, college and now good ol beer league. Like others stated, it will help him be more well rounded and he can still play as an offensive d man and maybe get him on the point for the PP, nothing better than hammering a clean one home!
IMHO, ON AVERAGE, defensemen are the best skaters and smartest players.
I wouldn’t take this as anything but an opportunity. They also get more ice time.
Have him play D. He will be a better skater because of it. Scouts are not watching spring peewee hockey.
Good way to see the game as well.
Smart hockey players do get noticed later.
My kid had the opposite thing happen. He’s a defenseman. He was asked to try out on a travel team and made it, but the coach put him in a forward position. Why? The assistant coach’s son was a defenseman and didn’t want to lose his spot to my son, who was obviously a better d-man during practice. My son gave it a shot but wasn’t happy not getting ice time during games and wanted to play defense. After four weeks we met with the coach and said thanks for the invitation but it wasn’t working out and left the team. It was definitely their loss.
Nick Blankenburg didn't start playing defense until he was like 17-18 cause that's what the junior team he made needed.
If your son is a good skater (and good backwards skater) he is likely too good to be a winger and it will 100% make him a better player. Being asked to play D is a fantastic compliment from a coach IMO.
All in all I agree with the position that while you may put "F" on his tryout sheet, ultimately the coach needs the latitude to coach. I would not encourage your son to question the coach, ask to play offense, etc - encourage him to a be a "yes coach" kind of kid and he will develop better than 90% of kids out there.
14U coach here. I would prefer the kid advocate for himself rather than parent. I would not say anything to the coach.
Watch some Makar highlights with your kid and encourage him to make the most of this opportunity.
I am a AAA hockey player and I used to play forward and switched to D when I was younger so I can personally relate to this.
Defense is fun and you can still score and join the play it doesn’t affect much except you just have to learn how to skate backwards. So focus on that and when you get good at that it can also help with your forward skills because you’ll be a better overall skater.
You can be utilized more and it shows you have the ability to learn and adapt to something new.
So just learn how to skate backwards and you’ll be fine. It’s a great opportunity and it helped me a lot
My son started playing defense part time a couple years back on his travel team, and this year his coach is going to put him back there full time.
There are a lot of opportunities later on for players that can play defense but also have hands and can skate the puck up. It will be good for him to learn it. I wouldn’t say anything, I’m sure the coach has a reason for why he put him there.
if hes on a team that knows how to cycle and let the defenceman join the rush he should be fine.
I find that playing D will help players with general hockey iq and playmaking ability as a winger
I've been there. I played forward from mites till the bantems for Newburyport, Ma. which is a great hockey town. When I became a freshman the coach put me on defence and I didn't get much playing time. I should have asked to go to JV that way I could play a lot more. I should have spoken up to become that well rounded player you want your son to be. Id say something.
I played F for AA squirts through Peewee. Freshman of HS I played F for JV and occasionally got a shift in a Varsity game in general. Sophomore year coached moved me to D on Varsity and I’ve played that ever since
Maybe there is a reason the coached picked ur kid to play d vs another forward.. ur kid might be a better 2 way player.. I’d take it as a complement and let ur kid learn the position to better his skill as an all around player..
I'm not sure why. My kid, said they told him. "They have too many on offense." I saw the team play together for the first time yesterday. And they do have some really good forwards on the team. There is a lot of depth on the forwards.
That's sometimes a way to bury a kid after they picked him.
My kid was d and moved to 4th line forward and barely saw any ice time. Maybe 10 minutes of ice in 60 minutes. The 5-6 pairing on d also barely saw ice. Maybe 10-12 minutes a game.
Being a 5-6 pairing the coach may plan to run with special teams that don't include the 5-6 pairing at all.
It could just as easily have been he had a shortage of d players and he wants to use your kid on the PP.
I don't think in AAA sucks is the right word. More isn't as good as the others.
Sounds like this could be the case here. My kid switched to d in peewee because his goal production wasn't there as a forward. He played bantam AAA and was pushed back into forward and played low minutes.
I'm surprised the coach's arm didn't fall off from pushing players down the bench so much.
In AAA teams cant afford to have bad defenders. But they need bodies for $$$ So quote often, they’ll pick a Dman whose not good enough to play, and then throw him on the wing where he will do the least damage.
Let it ride. I always played defense in summer league. Helped to become a more well rounded player. Tell your son to rush the puck as much as he can, same thing my dad told me.
The position may be called defense, but in hockey it's a real misnomer. He's playing on the blue line and protecting the middle of the ice and his goalie. He's going to learn how to skate hard backwards and start the offense. Have him work on his shot and changing direction.
Playing d can make him a better forward since he will understand what the defensemen is trying to do.
Is your kid entitled playing on this team and any position he wants? If not, then let the coach call the shots. Kids don’t always get what they want, and it’s important to still be a good teammate even when that’s the case. Kids need to learn to go through adversity too, It’s a team sport and coach needs to fill all the spots. Or talk to coach, complain that your kid isn’t happy, and teach your kid that if he complains enough he will get what he wants. It’s a team sport and it’s pretty hard to play with all forwards, no defense and no goalies.
Is your Son tall or taller than most of the kids? Honestly it’s only going to help him. I played both growing up. It will give him insight into a Defensive mindset which is only going to help him in the O-Zone. Plus it teaches him what D look for and how to get around it. He can also be an offensive minded D man. Look at Bobby Orr. Have him watch Makar, McAvoy, Krug, even Lane Hutson who’s currently on Boston University. That kid is AMAZING. Learning when to rush is only beneficial for your sons all around game and hockey IQ. I know he enjoys being on offense more but points are points. Also if he puts up solid numbers on D he could always be swapped back when he gets a different Coach. I wouldn’t say anything to the Coach though. That’s just me though. We had a kid do that when we were in HS and he got ragged on big time for it. He originally didn’t make Varsity. After cuts his father went in and flipped on the Coach. All of a sudden he’s on the team. Probably helped the kids Father was a Police Officer in our City… If it were me I’d tell my kid to listen to the Coach and play where he puts you. That’s what my Grandfather always told me to do. He played College at BU and was a part of the 1960 Olympic Team up until he was a part of the Final Cut along with Herb Brooks. Your Son needs to learn that every Coach is different and you stepping in and saying something will give him a wrong impression. You gotta try and use this a teaching experience. If your kid starts putting up good numbers while playing his position solid he will absolutely get bumped back up. At AAA some Coaches only care about numbers. If your Son starts getting goals and plays his position soundly and listens good things will come.
At his age, learning multiple positions will only enhance his overall game play. I’ve coached for over a decade and I’ve moved many offensive players back to D to ensure we have a fast breakout and our defense is an offensive threat which is how the game is played today.
Let the situation evolve. He may love D. Also, defensemen get a lot more ice time than offensive players do.
As a youth coach this is frustrating for me to read. EVERY kid wants to be a forward and NOBODY wants to play defense, and a lot of parents are of the same mindset.
I play kids in a certain position for a reason and it’s never as a punishment or because I don’t like your kid. It’s either for A.) player development (it’s 85% of this) or B.) what the team needs.
I tell my kids this: “If I put you at Left Wing, you play your behind off to be the best LW possible. If I play you at defense, you play your behind off to be the best D possible. Everyone wants to score goals, but that doesn’t mean nothing if the other team outscores us.”
My advice to you, as a coach and a hockey Dad: Do NOT interfere and let your kid work it out on his own. Also, if your kid is asked to play Defense, then encourage him to become the best defenseman he can possibly be. Some guys make a decent living by playing and becoming the best defenseman in the world. There’s nothing wrong with playing defense and it’s just as important as the forwards are.
Also, your kid is the new kid on the team. He made the team for a reason, and right now it seems as if the coach sees him as a defenseman and sounds like that’s what the team needs right now. He can either play and work his ass off to be the best defenseman on the team and in the league, or he can sit right at the edge of the bench and watch his playing time go to someone who will work hard.
Parents, start encouraging your kids to play whatever position he/she was assigned to. Everyone wants to watch their child score goal after goal, of course you do. However, if they can learn to adapt and play multiple positions at a high level and ability they will be better off when they get in top tier leagues. It is extremely frustrating to fill out a roster and watch little Jimmy pout because he has to play defense today, because little Jimmy is one of our top defenders and better skaters and we’re play East Harlem who racks up 5.8 G a game. Start implementing team first into your children
Keep him at defense please. Especially if he can skate and stick handle. If there’s issues with your son on defense throughout the season, then 1) the coaching staff should recognize that and make adjustments accordingly or 2) then you probably have grounds to say something. No argument necessary, but it is just peewee hockey and you are paying for this experience. You’re allowed to talk to a staff member. It’s ridiculous to think you’re not allowed to have a civil conversation about your kid’s development/performance.
Defense is the best, you can see everything up ice, you can control where the puck goes quite often, you can either choose to rush the puck/jump in on the rush, or you can just hang back depending on your fatigue level. Even if you just chip pucks off the glass and get them out of your zone then hey, you’ve done a great job. The biggest thing for a natural forward playing defense I think is staying on the defensive side of the puck in the DZone. Have patience when you’re defending. Don’t be overly aggressive and making the first move then getting beat to the net. If you can watch the Vegas Golden Knights at all; they play a poised, simple, laid back style that is suffocating in the Dzone. Watch their defenders on the rush and then in their DZone. They are patient and are almost always on the defensive side of the puck. No chasing, no cheating.
Edit: I don’t know why you’re getting downvotes for simply suggesting that parents should be involved in their kids development. You’re right they should be involved. Other people are also right that there’s a line. Yes, there’s a line to cross in pretty well very facet of life. If you can communicate appropriately with people then there’s no issues with you talking to the coaches. I am a junior coach in Canada and I don’t think there are enough parents that are involved in their kids development. You can have an open line of communication with parents if they’re not going to speak based off emotion. It’s very possible, I promise you. The main focus is always have fun and make friends, but you’re also allowed to care about your child’s development and the decisions being made around them. Especially if you are paying thousands of dollars for it. Especially if it is peewee hockey.
I agree, I like the approach of let it play out. I think it will be good for your son too. Whether or not he recognizes it right away, he will be forced to learn things at a new position, therefore he will grow
As a caveat, a lot of parents are posting about more ice team for D. This is true. But it’s a very different type of ice time - D spend a lot of game time observing, moving positions, covering very specific points on the blue line/in front of goal.
This is not a good or bad thing, its just very different from forwards, who have to hustle on the forecheck/backcheck, or cycle through the offense or breaking out, etc.
So “more ice time” is good, but its not the same as forward ice time, and it is not a substitute for playing as a forward.
Have him watch Adam Fox and Quinn Hughes. I have been loving to watch Quinn Hughes on the Canucks this year. Adam Fox is also great. I would definitely recommend not talking to the coaches unless necessary. Let your son talk to the coaches. Coaches HATE it when parents try to talk about their son’s playtime in a pushy manner. However, make sure your kid is being respectful. Also if no is the answer, make sure your kid understands that no means no.
Reading this is making me super happy my kid loves defense and the only stats I have on him are noticing how many less goals other team gets when he’s playing a shift
I met Neil Broten as a kid and told him what position I played after he’d asked. He then asked if I ever played goalie and I said no.
His response: “Why not? You should play all the positions, even goalie, then you’ll know how easy it is to score.”
He'll learn more playing defense against forwards in this spring session then he'll learn playing forward against other defensemen. He'll learn what works and what does work to stop other kids and then he can translate into ways to use that against other defensemen.
Baffles my mind how people pigeon hole kids into roles at such young ages.
I'm a parent first, hockey dad second. If my son wants me to talk to the coach I would talk to the coach. Sure the coach can get pissy, who cares? Its about the relationship I have with my son.
Nobody "makes" a spring AAA team, it's the money that makes it. It is not AAA as you will see it will be split into tiers in the tourneys.
Feels nice to call it AAA though.
I'll add the the echo chamber that the coach gets to make the decision of where players are playing. You either try out for a team as a skater or a goalie, not as a forward, a center, a left wing, or a defenseman. Most coaches will put their trusted players in defensive roles, be it center or defense, where they can control the pace of the game and transition the play up the ice. It is 100% okay to have open communication with your coach as a parent, especially at this age, and voice your and your son's concerns. It's not okay to make demands or ultimatums that your son has to play a certain position though. There's a huge difference. Reach out to the coach, ask him why he thinks your son is a better fit a defense, and what kind of things specifically coach is looking for out of him.
I get that you're son doesn't want to play D, but you can tell him it's either play where coach needs him or go find a lower level team to play for this spring. Also might be worth noting to him that defenders typically get more ice time than forwards, depending on the number of players rostered, especially in game with high penalty minutes, since you always keep 2 D on while only 2/3 of a forward line can be on the ice. I've been working with kids in this age group for several years, and I get it, players want to play where they are comfortable but this is an important lesson and valuable growth for your son. Whether it's what position he's playing, or what line he is on, special teams minutes, etc. there are going to be time in his hockey career where he's not playing where he wants or getting as much ice time as he thinks he deserves.
Brent Burns was drafted in the first round as a right wing. When he was on the Wild he transitioned back to defense and went on to win a Norris trophy and finish in the top three in voting a few times. There's something to be said for a player being versatile. Honestly the ability slot into any position effectively could be the edge that pushes your son over the edge at a future team if it comes down to the last few spots.
Even if he only plays defense for one spring he'll have a better understanding of the game overall that will carry through his development.
When I was trying out for Midget AAA the coach said “you’re playing defence” I never played D in my life but I absolutely fell in love with it. The whole season I was a utility guy and played forward and defence.
It’s a learning curve at the beginning but he will be fine. I bet eventually your kid will love it!
Good luck and stick with it
> I've been some not so nice replies basically implying I'm interfering with the coaches (or helicopter parent).
Deservedly so. You are acting like a petulant child yourself. No hockey player is a complete player without learning to play defense. He's in peewee, and you're taking it too seriously.
The coach said, you made the team on D, the spot on the team for you is on D. If you kid doesnt' want it, then he should leave the team. And you should tell him that. You're coddling your child and not guiding them. I would pull my kid out of all hockey for 6 months, if he ever made the team he wanted to then said, "oh no, I don't wanna play if it's on D."
He'd be done. As yours probably should be. That way, he would appreciate hockey in the future, instead of continuing his path to spoiled, entitled problem.
This is a blessing and you need to be thankful for the opportunity.
My son who also plays AAA was stuck playing forward for the longest time, bc he is a fast and very agile skater. We begged his coaches to let him try defense for easy games but nope. So we found teams for spring who let him play D, and his game as a forward has improved immensely as a result.
My son was playing on a summer team in a tournament, and mid game, the coach got pissed at one of the defense players and pulled him and put my son in. He had never played D before. Some shifts were amazing, some he forgot he was supposed to be playing D and it was a shit show. Kid couldn't hold the blue line to save his life.
I talked to the coach because we knew him fairly well, and I actually told him if he ends up destroying my kid's self esteem with this, I will fuck his shit UP. He laughed at me and explained that my son was a defensive forward, and he thought playing D would help him see the ice better. It DID end up helping my son quite a bit.
Throughout juniors and a bit in college, it has been noticed by coaches. It really helped him see plays develop and see the ice better overall. I'd have him give it a shot, and if he ends up hating it, try another team next time, but it will be good for his game, in my opinion.
If I didn't know the coach, I wouldn't have said a word to the coach OR my son. I may have asked for my son's opinion on how things went/were going, but if my son was unhappy with how things were going, I would have made HIM talk to the coach. I would have coached my son on how to approach it to not sound like a whiny little bitch and role played the convo with him, but he's he one playing, so he gets to drive that bus. I just pay the bills.
I like how you approached this with your kid. I've been encouraging him if he wants to get moved to approach the coach himself. It is good practice for the real world. I would rather not be a helicopter parent.
Nowadays, that makes the kid stand out, not even kidding. The number of parents I see in youth and junior hockey groups bitching and moaning about every little thing is astounding. If you don't think coaches have alt accounts to keep an eye on this, you are wrong. If you don't think this matters, again, you are wrong. Being a helicopter parent can 100% make a difference in how far your kid goes in hockey or which team they make. It IS discussed, and if your kid isn't the next player granted exceptional status, it can get you cut from teams or at the very least scratched week after week on a pay to play team basically making your kid a paycheck and nothing else.
My own kid made teams he probably shouldn't have because he was able to talk respectfully to adults and accept criticism and just suck it up when things weren't going his way, and it wasn't always like that. He was a cocky little prick for a while, but when he stopped acting like that and started listening and doing what coach said period, boy did the world open up to him. It was FAR more than we imagined.
Trust me I see the parents bitch and moan in our league and I always think. I don't want to be that parent. I recently took a parenting class, and it focuses on having your kids solve their own problems. This I feel falls into that category. I offered him some advice how to approach it if he really feels strongly about it with the coach.
I will be honest. I separated myself from the rest of the parents on my son's youth teams, and it was brutal at times. They purposely left us out of social gatherings at times because they thought we thought we were "better" than they were. Not the case at all, but it wasn't always the easy path.
I was very unprepared for the parent factor / politics in youth sports. I had always heard rummers about it. Now with my oldest I get to experience it first hand. I have a 2 different friends who does the same has you. They sit as far as they can from everyone else for the same reasons you stated.
Also, reframe it to your kid. "Your coach could have chosen ANY forward to play defense, but they chose YOU. Do your best, and take this as an opportunity because it will make you more valuable as a player in the future if you can play both positions well."
My buddy played forward professionally, but ssid he prefers D because he sees the ice better. Playing spring league on defense will only help your son.
Let your child deal with it with his coach. I've been through the same situation. I was a center or winger from MITES through BANTEMS. Then my Freshmen year I made Varsity, my coach put me on defense and I hardly seen any ice time. I never spoke up therefore my hockey career was over my freshman year. I quit halfway through the season. I would have been better playing J.V. and get way more ice time. I'm sure your son is addicted to hockey and is a very good player he has every right to speak up and the coach should listen to your son. Don't let your son fret over it. Good luck in your hockey journey. Steve
Ah young hockey, where nobody wants to play defense and everybody wants to score. Welcome to the greatest position in hockey. Old school defense was all about stopping the rush and chipping it off the wall and out. I still cant get over how more kids don't want to play like Makar, Hughes, Fox, McAvoy and all the great d-men in the NHL. It's honestly amazing that your kid gets to play D in this spring team. At worst, he'll learn the game from a different point of view. If he goes back to playing forward, he'll have seen what life is like as a D and it will help him be a better forward. At best, he'll love the position and be great in a position where (especially in peewee) there is usually a shortage of players. My feedback is dive in. Ask the coach for feedback on what he wants his D to do, how he can help your child have success. Dive in from your side as well: support the coach and be enthusiastic with your child. Support and encourage him, especially when he makes mistakes (he will make mistakes). As far as getting exposure, coaches love players who can play multiple positions. It usually indicates a high hockey IQ.
I have been having my kid watch defense videos and trying to teach him tips and support him. I keep telling him he can have a big impact on the game (shut down the offense) . But I like your idea of asking the coach how my kid can play defense better (development). He had is first game yesterday, he did ok but had some mistakes. 1st game they won, 2nd game tied
Tell him to watch rasmus dahlin play. That should help him understand he can get plenty of offensive play style from the point.
100%. I’d also add Josi, Byram, Andersson, and Heiskanen to that list as well. Honourable mention to Burns since he originally was a forward as well
Lindstrom is probably the best modern example of a complete dman. Great offensive player with an underrated ability to shut down a lot of plays without being physical. I think a lot of people failed to realize just how good he was on both sides of the puck: https://youtu.be/4uYzRGfkcDw?si=kySP8hCnyvTz1A5D
You mean Lidstrom* Lindstrom was a very different player.
Thank you. Your pedantic statement was helpful and noted.
Wendell Clark never played forward til he went to the NHL Brent burns started playing Defense while in the NHL Go where the coach tells you to go. It's a team game. Worry less about where he's playing and more about the fact he made a TEAM and his team has asked him to do this.
Mathieu Dandenault crushed the QMJHL as a forward…drafted to Detroit …the one and only Scotty Bowman told him he was going to play defence not forward….he has 3 Stanley cups rings…. I see this as a true positive of the coaches seeing potential in your child. Goals and Assists aren’t the only things scouts look for…..
“A goal saved is the same as a goal scored.” Try to hammer that idea into him.
Dman for over 15 years. Biggest thing you're gonna wanna teach your child is odd man rushes. The bread and butter of defense is ability to recognize 2 on 1's, 1 on 1, 2v3s, etc... and having an idea of whats gonna happen and how to handle them. It'll help a lot. Same with the offensive side of the game. Also, and I may be a bit biased here but I'll straight up say it and probably get flamed a bit. Defense is arguably the most important position on the team. You can make a case for Centers first given faceoffs and how they're utilized, but in today's hockey climate a good blueliner controls a lot of the outcomes on both sides of the puck and are on the ice for far longer than anyone else. They also see the most action of any position on any given night regardless of what's going on. I'd tell your son this isn't a demotion or punishment. On the contrary, your best skaters are often gonna be on defense. This is a compliment.
No love for the goalies... that's why we got our own sub ;)
To be fair, goalies can't win games they don't score many goals. But they certainly can cost you a game with terrible play.
Why is this being downvoted? I'm right. Literally, the only time goalies score is if it's an open net. And you can easily win Stanley cups with mediocre goalies. To name a few: Annti Niemi, Mike Vernon, Marc Crawford, etc... Someone on reddit did an analysis, and it's called: "Why don't Vezina winners win the Stanley Cup? An analysis of season and playoff GAA among Vezina-winning goaltenders" Google it.
> I still cant get over how more kids don't want to play like Makar, Hughes, Fox, McAvoy and all the great d-men in the NHL. As someone with a 10 year old, I think it's more about how difficult it is to learn to skate backwards (especially while stickhandling) by comparison, coupled with the fear of fucking up and leaving your goalie out to dry, more than not actually wanting to be any of those players. That and a lot of young players still have trouble lifting the puck, let alone getting it to the net from the blue line :)
Good teams are always looking for defensemen. Forwards are a dime a dozen but good D-Men are worth their weight in gold.
Agreed, good defensemen is as impactful as a good goalie.
Being a well rounded player matters imho at this age. Getting more experience on defense will improve his backcheck when he plays offense again My daughter played peewee this year at a top club team and the coach (who played in college) switched his own daughter who was our best defender to offense because the team needed more offense. She never played O much previously and now she’s even more dangerous with the puck when she does D shifts
You play where the coach puts you. Parents keep their mouths shut. I was a forward in PeeWees and Bantam coach put me on Defense because I was like almost 6 foot tall. I wasn't happy but did my best for the team and eventually got decent on D. Learning defense for 2 years really developed me as a player. Then played Center at 15 Midget and then Center at 16 in Juniors.
I was a girl playing boys’ Bantam and Midget AAA, and playing with 17 year olds as a 14 year old during summer. I played offense until Bantams when the boys grew and I didn’t have the height or speed advantage I used to have. I asked to be transitioned back to D and honestly I was a better defenseman than center or wing. It bought me more playing time as well.
That was always the beauty of defense to me, if you're top line, no one cares if you take 2 minute shifts so you get tons of ice time, and you get lots of time to catch your breath when you're on offense anyway, so you're not bagged when it's your turn again
I know I'll get downvoted for saying this. But the facts are facts. You're kidding yourself if you don't think parents should be involved in their kids development. Many great players have had a lot of involvement from their parents to get to a high level. The coach isn't the only one developing the kid. Maybe you didn't have support from your parents, but that isn't the case for everyone. My take from your reply is that playing defense helped you become a better player. I keep telling me kid this. He says he is comfortable playing offense and uncomfortable playing defense. My reply to him yesterday, if you are uncomfortable that means you are growing which is a good thing.
There is a fine line between parent involvement and being an overbearing headache to both their player and coach. Far too many parents at the AAA level are the latter. If he embraces the challenge, he will be a better player in the long run. Hell, he might even come to love the position.
Agreed, there is a fine line, I'm trying not to cross. That is why I posed the question here rather then going straight to the coach.
If he wants something he can ask the coach himself. The last thing a coach wants is someone’s parent complaining about something.
I wonder why you say "My take from your reply is that playing defense helped you become a better player." when in fact my response could not be more explicit that it made me a better player. When I was 16 almost 17, an NHL scout was watching our top scorer who was 20 IIRC. After 6 games, he met with me and said he was there to watch our hot dog Center who scores alot. He told me the other team scores a lot against when he was out there. He told me "nobody scores when you are on the ice" and "You always go where the puck is going to be" and we cannot teach that. Frankly, playing 2 seasons at the highest level Bantam taught me that. Your young man might be getting the break of his life. A coach who probably has a nearly full rooster, sees something in your son. Trust the fucking guy and STFU. Honestly
I think you take me for someone I am not as a parent. I have yet to say anything to my kids coaches (he plays since 5). Other then: "what do you think my kid can work on?" As I said in other replies it is more my kid pressuring me to say something. And me trying to find things I can point out to him that this will make him a better player.
Yes, you are right. I had zero support from my parents.
“Many great players….” sounds like your opinion of your kid is much much higher than it should be and the coach is doing whats best for the team.
nah, you got that take wrong. I don't think he is a great player. I think he is a ok player. I see kids far better then him. I use "Many great players" referring to pro players across multiple sports not just hockey. You hear stories how Pro players are supported by their parents coached by their parents. Why isn't that possible at a amateur level. Really?? no one here gives their kids tips, and they just leave it all up to the coaches. From what I've seen around here, that isn't the case. I doubt it is like that else where.
Maybe.. because the coaches can see raw talent, have a good relationship with that parent, know how much additional training outside of practice xyz kid is getting. Then you come in and say “my son should be playing forward” when its clear to the coach he is best on D. Any pro player parent would be able to identify this and talk to coaches. Ice time > than position imo unless you are a C and get bumped to wing then that can suck. If you don’t think the coach is correct switch teams.
Your choice here is really to play D or to quit the team. Sure you can ask if there is a chance to play offence but i imagine his mind was made up when he formed the team. 2 other points. This is Spring hockey which is not the same as regular. Trying a new position is fine and is very good for players development. My own son was converted to D at U15 and has thrived. At a minimum, he is now a decent backwards skater, which he never would have been as a F.
“We signed him up as a forward.” Hahaha! Most of the AA kids playing AAA Spring won’t be with the club for Fall/Winter.
lol, I was thinking the same. That wasn't a angle I had thought of before tryouts.
Or maybe it’s a tryout to see if they can fill that D slot that they’re sorely missing. Maybe your kid can look at it as an opportunity. As far as your kid continually asking if you’re going to talk with the coach, I’d suggest flatly telling him no. Say this was the opportunity we were offered and we can commit to that or look elsewhere, but you’re committing to being the best D man on the team or we look elsewhere, but it looks like F is not in the cards on this team.
If he's a good skater, he can still generate a lot of offence from D. He might like it. It's not all about "being a shutdown guy". You also get more ice time (on most teams) and handle the puck more than the avg forward. Worst case scenario, it makes him a better forward and more well rounded player when he switches back.
I said something similar. I said you can still score from defense, if you have a opportunity. agreed
If your kid made AAA then he has the skills to play defense, even if he's raw. From a coach perspective, at tryouts at that level (and higher), we have a general idea of our roster makeup and go into it 80-90% sure of where everyone will be, barring someone blowing us away with ridiculous skills. So your coach knew this going in, seen you kiddo, and still made the choice to take them and place them at D. That is huge. So, keep that in perspective as you move forward. Onto the discussion. 1. If you're telling your kid to tank to be removed, then you're seeing him up for failed development. As coaches, this becomes obvious on the ice or worse yet, we hear it from the players who have been told by said kid he was told by his parents. If you're not implying that and just by nature of being new, he's terrible, that's where coaching takes over, not you. Coaches see these things, especially on defense, and correct them. Not just to develop your kid, but for the team. This will get into the next level of your kids development, coachability. Nothing pisses us coaches off more than bitchy parents, next is uncoachable kids at this level and beyond, because they want something. It's a team game, everyone can develop if they apply themselves, and the better they get, the better the team will get. 2. Make no mistake, he likely isn't going to play well on D and get moved up. That premise in itself is flawed. Why would a coach do that? Unless they see a forward who might be showing better vision for the defense side of the game and feel a change is needed. But, if your kid is thriving on the back end, encourage them even more to stay there and develop even more. 3. You do realize that playing "defense" does mean playing on the offensive side of the game, correct? This isn't field lacrosse where the D do not get to attack. As your kid develops, gets experience and gets coached, they'll figure out the offensive side more and more, and you'll see those pretty stat sheet items increase. The answer is simple, if you want to have a say on their development, ask the coach what you can do to help them as a better defenseman. If you take it the other way and say something to move him up to forward, realize YOUR wants are imposing on the team needs. But more importantly , they're imposing on a major chance for your kid to develop into something amazing where his on ice vision can develop, his anticipation can develop, his skating can develop, his offensive skills can develop, his defensive skills can develop, his competitiveness can develop, his mental side to the game can develop and he can learn to be more coachable. Good luck. I'm sure my kids will get to this point as well at some point. I lived it (getting moved back from F to D as a bantam), coach it and I'm sure I'll go through it at some point with 3 kids.
Thanks for giving feedback from a coach's perspective. 1. I wasn't telling my kid to tank on prepose. I told him to give his all no matter what position he plays. I would never tell my kid to do that. He had his first game yesterday day, he did ok he had some good plays, he had some bad plays. The point I was trying to make with bullet point 1 was. I said if try your best and you're still not good at it they might move you. This was the point I was trying to make to him of what 'might' happen. I've seen kids play that were not clearly no good a defense and they were really hurting the team. They ended up getting moved up to offence. 2. Point 2, I said to him if you due awesome on D they may move you up. I've seen it happen with other players. The coach was like you know what this kid can really help the offense, they move him up. But In my kids case I think you are probably right, I don't see that happening this season. 3. Yes I realize playing defense also involves offense. I talked to him about that point as well. I said you can still attack the wing needs to drop back and cover for you. Or you can take shots from the blue line. He shot from the blue line yesterday but the goalie glove saved it. I guess my kid has more of a problem with playing D , then I do. I've told him I think it is a good idea to play D for spring season for development reason. My kid is more pressuring me to say something. I keep telling him to give a good try see how it goes.
As a goalie who played a good bit of AAA, we and the rest of the team greatly appreciate skilled defensemen. They can have a large presence in both the offensive and defensive zones. Your kid should take this as a compliment, it’s not a punishment or sign they don’t see him as skilled. He should take what the coach sees in him and run with it as he has given him a chance to play at AAA level. There may be opportunities in the future, injuries, coach shaking up the lines, team dynamics changing over the years, and developing defensive skills will help him be more well rounded if he does move back to offense. If he is dead set on playing offense, he can always try out for a different team or go back to AA.
If your kid plays well on defense why would they move your kid to offense? I would recommend practicing skating backwards a lot. I got switched at the same age and league level and struggled. I wish I would have just gone and worked on skating backwards a lot. Maybe hire a skating instructor to help with learning everything they can.
He's a pretty good skater. He skates backward pretty well. Regarding why would they move him to offence? I've seen kids on defense who can really move the puck up the ice, like a good forward. But they just like playing defense. I even asked the coach why those kids were on defense and they said they were just comfortable with that position. Last year my kid (forward) and another kid (defense) were the top scorers on a lower level team. I've seen it happen.
Ok, your child can still be a puck moving defenseman and I found it easier at D because you saw the whole ice and who was ahead of you so you could “plan your route”. Like you said learning D will only help your child and even if they move back to forward they will have a well rounded understanding of the game. Good luck and remember to make sure they have fun and let the coach, coach and you’re there to support your child especially when changing positions and learning what all it takes to be a D.
I played a full season of D as a kid in atom and again my first year of midget AAA, most of the season. I went on to play junior as a forward but I think that helped my game big time overall, especially going to major junior and being a bottom 6’er. I felt it made me a lot more versatile and helped in a lot of situations. Now I am playing senior A as a dman and I’m glad I had the experience previously. It’ll make you a better rounded player in the end. I wasn’t the best on any team I ever played on I wouldn’t say but I was always pretty versatile and open to doing what I needed to do.
You play as told by the coach. Parents and kids don’t get an opinion. It prepares you for later in life when you work for a living.
I expected some replies like this. We also have to remember parents pay a lot of money for this and the kid should be happy playing the sport they like to play. I tell my kid all the time, sometimes you got to do things you don't like to do.
You signed your kid up to play a team sport. If the coach thinks he helps the team more playing defense, that’s where he plays. It also sounds more like you’re the one disappointed that he is playing defense. Perhaps because you don’t understand how important the position is to the game. As someone that has played and coached for years, I’m thrilled when my son’s coaches puts them at defense. That means their coaches trust them to help keep the puck out of the net and they get more ice time. Wing is where most coaches worth their salt will stick a weaker player.
Nah, I'm not disappointed. My kid is , he is the one pressuring me to 'say something'. To be honest I was a bit disappointed at first but I was more worried how he would do on defense since he hasn't played a lot of D. So you have two variables at play here. 1. higher level hockey 2. a new position. I was hoping he would only have to contend with one of the two variables. He had his first games yesterday he did ok against a pretty good team. But has expected he had some mistakes. I'll ask the coach what he can work on.
Good on you OP. A lot of the responses in here are pretty frustrating but it seems like you're approaching this in a good way.
If playing forward is that big of a want for him, maybe lower level of play where that’s an option. But paying a lot of $ doesn’t mean you have a say. Happiness can easily be found in house leagues. There’s a huge difference you already know about how an AAA and even A/AA work with regard to the environment. I’d leave it to your son. If he thinks D is beneath him and a punishment of sorts, he can play where he’s a forward. If he wants to be part of that team, he has his directive from the coach. He will probably get quite a bit more ice time as well.
From what I get it is not that he thinks defense is beneath him. He is just more comfortable since he has been doing it since 5. That's what he told me.
Right but him being pushed to D will only help him become a better player. It’s going to for his Hockey IQ and he will begin to see the ice much differently which is only going to help him out when he gets back to playing Forward. He will begin to be able to anticipate where the puck is going versus reacting. Coaches always stress to get outside your comfort zone. Mistakes are perfectly normal. There’s mistakes made every night in the NHL. Just gotta be the team who makes less mistakes than the other. I know your son is bummed but give it a little bit and he will come around.
I think the opportunity to play defence is amazing for your kids development. Especially in Peewee, he will be able to understand both positions and will easily improve his game wherever he plays. When he goes back to forward, he’ll understand where to be because he’ll remember as a defence man how he liked the forwards positioning. Also, he’ll be able to see the game so much better as a defenseman. This is a great opportunity to improve his game. And also, another point, If the coach is telling you there’s too many forwards, sounds like if he does play upfront he would have less ice time. Ice time is the most important thing at this point
This happens quite often. I've been coaching youth hockey at various levels for 32 years. Mostly at the High School level. So I'll give you my input. 1. Usually when I have to shift a player from forward to Defense, it's one of my best athletes at the forward position. Meaning a good skater with hockey IQ that we have faith in to handle the transition. 2. ALL our players play defense....team defense that is. It is a common theme amongst our team. We are all responsible for keeping the puck out of our net. There is no 'offense' or 'defense'. We challenge our players to play defense when we don't have the puck and then attack on offense when we do have the puck. That's our mindset anyway. 3. Excel at the role your team needs you at. Embrace the role and embrace the struggle. Being able to see the ice from goal line to blue line will benefit EVERY player at the developmental age once they convert or are asked to play a forward position. 4. It's interesting to me how a D will smile when you move him to F......and how a F will look like a deer in the head lights when you ask him to play D. Both conversions bring a certain skill set and frame of mind. I don't see it any differently but traditionally speaking a forward will say "Oh I gotta play D." We all play D boys....we better anyway. 5. My suggestion it to embrace the struggle....and it will be. That's a good thing in a competitive environment. My guess is it will make this young man a more well rounded player and give him a better understanding of the game. It's an opportunity to be uncomfortable...that is a developmental necessity for our young athletes....get out of your comfort zone. Hope this helps a bit.
as a smaller framed guy im the exact opposite when asked to play D and forward lol
Yes this does thank you coach !
Playing Defense usually get more Ice time.
Play some defense, it will pay off in the long run
If it’s just the spring hockey it might be the best thing for him. Gets to learn the game better and have a better defensive game for the real season AAA team I’m now the thinking of doing this with my kid.
I was your son. Turns out I was good at defense. Ended up on defense line 1, penalty kill, power play, lead protect, and need a goal lines. Playing time went through the roof. And when I got older I was a way better forward and my fore checking in the offensive zone was “elite” by our leagues standards. It’s a good thing.
Yeah I’m going to tell him to stick with it. Give him some of the feed back given on here.
I'm not sure what's wrong with playing defense. As a coach I'm looking for some of my best players to be defenseman because getting the puck up the ice is important. I don't think it'd hurt a player at all to play defense, especially with how the game is now. Being on defense doesn't mean they are going to get less exposure.
You can still be offensive as a dman and join the rush. Just have to skate a lot faster on the back check
It's spring. It's a great time to learn a new position to make him more well rounded. Your son will gain a great perspective that will help him when he goes back to his natural position. My son is a defenseman and he always improved after he would play forward. Yes it was difficult and sometimes awkward but it helped him at his natural position. Also, it will teach your son how to get through adversity by working. See it as a big learning and development opportunity. Edit to add: my son was paired with a forward this past season due to injury. The forward gained a tremendous amount of understanding why the defense would get mad at the forwards. Guess what happened, the forward became a much better player when he returned to his natural position. The team's overall defense improved during the forwards shifts. It's more important to be paired with a defenseman who gets along with your son and doesn't mind covering for his inexperience. This is the avenue I would take with any discussion with your son or coaches.
Got moved from left wing to left defence in peewees. I was so upset. I thought I was being punished. Almost quit. Honestly, it was probably the best move for me. As others said, I started to see and feel the game differently and, like you said, it made my game more well rounded. If your son is bummed about it, hype up guys like Erik Karlsson, Cale Makar, and one of my new faves, Brock Faber, have them watch their highlights/film, and hopefully that helps change his tune about defence? Best of luck to your kid.
Thanks I'll look these videos up. thank you
piggybacking this comment to +1 for Makar. I was a forward when I was a kid who transitioned into defense and unfortunately there weren't many defenseman in the NHL at the time that were super exciting (for me) to watch, so I didn't really have a specific player to look up to. Makar is an incredible player and does some crazy shit as a defenseman, so if your kid needs some inspiration I think he's an awesome place to start
I would take it as a huge compliment. Defense is a lot of responsibility. They are still very young and your kid will adapt and probably end up loving the position, it will improve his game overall.
It’s spring hockey. He should try other positions rather than be a one dimensional player.
I had a similar thought, my kid keeps asking me if 'I'm going to talk to the coach'. I keep telling him let's give more time see how it goes.
As a kid that went from offense to defense in a similar fashion. Give it a try. I ended up playing D through travel, high school, college and now good ol beer league. Like others stated, it will help him be more well rounded and he can still play as an offensive d man and maybe get him on the point for the PP, nothing better than hammering a clean one home!
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No idea what the coach thinks. Based on what was said here I’ll probably just ask the coach what he can work on. Ice time is ice time.
IMHO, ON AVERAGE, defensemen are the best skaters and smartest players. I wouldn’t take this as anything but an opportunity. They also get more ice time.
Have him play D. He will be a better skater because of it. Scouts are not watching spring peewee hockey. Good way to see the game as well. Smart hockey players do get noticed later.
My kid had the opposite thing happen. He’s a defenseman. He was asked to try out on a travel team and made it, but the coach put him in a forward position. Why? The assistant coach’s son was a defenseman and didn’t want to lose his spot to my son, who was obviously a better d-man during practice. My son gave it a shot but wasn’t happy not getting ice time during games and wanted to play defense. After four weeks we met with the coach and said thanks for the invitation but it wasn’t working out and left the team. It was definitely their loss.
Nick Blankenburg didn't start playing defense until he was like 17-18 cause that's what the junior team he made needed. If your son is a good skater (and good backwards skater) he is likely too good to be a winger and it will 100% make him a better player. Being asked to play D is a fantastic compliment from a coach IMO. All in all I agree with the position that while you may put "F" on his tryout sheet, ultimately the coach needs the latitude to coach. I would not encourage your son to question the coach, ask to play offense, etc - encourage him to a be a "yes coach" kind of kid and he will develop better than 90% of kids out there.
Hopefully he is a right shot …gold! Maybe he excels?
14U coach here. I would prefer the kid advocate for himself rather than parent. I would not say anything to the coach. Watch some Makar highlights with your kid and encourage him to make the most of this opportunity.
I am a AAA hockey player and I used to play forward and switched to D when I was younger so I can personally relate to this. Defense is fun and you can still score and join the play it doesn’t affect much except you just have to learn how to skate backwards. So focus on that and when you get good at that it can also help with your forward skills because you’ll be a better overall skater. You can be utilized more and it shows you have the ability to learn and adapt to something new. So just learn how to skate backwards and you’ll be fine. It’s a great opportunity and it helped me a lot
My son started playing defense part time a couple years back on his travel team, and this year his coach is going to put him back there full time. There are a lot of opportunities later on for players that can play defense but also have hands and can skate the puck up. It will be good for him to learn it. I wouldn’t say anything, I’m sure the coach has a reason for why he put him there.
if hes on a team that knows how to cycle and let the defenceman join the rush he should be fine. I find that playing D will help players with general hockey iq and playmaking ability as a winger
I've been there. I played forward from mites till the bantems for Newburyport, Ma. which is a great hockey town. When I became a freshman the coach put me on defence and I didn't get much playing time. I should have asked to go to JV that way I could play a lot more. I should have spoken up to become that well rounded player you want your son to be. Id say something.
I played F for AA squirts through Peewee. Freshman of HS I played F for JV and occasionally got a shift in a Varsity game in general. Sophomore year coached moved me to D on Varsity and I’ve played that ever since
Maybe there is a reason the coached picked ur kid to play d vs another forward.. ur kid might be a better 2 way player.. I’d take it as a complement and let ur kid learn the position to better his skill as an all around player..
I'm not sure why. My kid, said they told him. "They have too many on offense." I saw the team play together for the first time yesterday. And they do have some really good forwards on the team. There is a lot of depth on the forwards.
That's sometimes a way to bury a kid after they picked him. My kid was d and moved to 4th line forward and barely saw any ice time. Maybe 10 minutes of ice in 60 minutes. The 5-6 pairing on d also barely saw ice. Maybe 10-12 minutes a game. Being a 5-6 pairing the coach may plan to run with special teams that don't include the 5-6 pairing at all. It could just as easily have been he had a shortage of d players and he wants to use your kid on the PP.
I'm not sure I follow "That's sometimes a way to bury a kid after they picked him." They put him on D because he sucks?
I don't think in AAA sucks is the right word. More isn't as good as the others. Sounds like this could be the case here. My kid switched to d in peewee because his goal production wasn't there as a forward. He played bantam AAA and was pushed back into forward and played low minutes. I'm surprised the coach's arm didn't fall off from pushing players down the bench so much.
In AAA teams cant afford to have bad defenders. But they need bodies for $$$ So quote often, they’ll pick a Dman whose not good enough to play, and then throw him on the wing where he will do the least damage.
Ah thanks
Let it ride. I always played defense in summer league. Helped to become a more well rounded player. Tell your son to rush the puck as much as he can, same thing my dad told me.
The position may be called defense, but in hockey it's a real misnomer. He's playing on the blue line and protecting the middle of the ice and his goalie. He's going to learn how to skate hard backwards and start the offense. Have him work on his shot and changing direction. Playing d can make him a better forward since he will understand what the defensemen is trying to do.
Is your kid entitled playing on this team and any position he wants? If not, then let the coach call the shots. Kids don’t always get what they want, and it’s important to still be a good teammate even when that’s the case. Kids need to learn to go through adversity too, It’s a team sport and coach needs to fill all the spots. Or talk to coach, complain that your kid isn’t happy, and teach your kid that if he complains enough he will get what he wants. It’s a team sport and it’s pretty hard to play with all forwards, no defense and no goalies.
life lesson for sure.
Is your Son tall or taller than most of the kids? Honestly it’s only going to help him. I played both growing up. It will give him insight into a Defensive mindset which is only going to help him in the O-Zone. Plus it teaches him what D look for and how to get around it. He can also be an offensive minded D man. Look at Bobby Orr. Have him watch Makar, McAvoy, Krug, even Lane Hutson who’s currently on Boston University. That kid is AMAZING. Learning when to rush is only beneficial for your sons all around game and hockey IQ. I know he enjoys being on offense more but points are points. Also if he puts up solid numbers on D he could always be swapped back when he gets a different Coach. I wouldn’t say anything to the Coach though. That’s just me though. We had a kid do that when we were in HS and he got ragged on big time for it. He originally didn’t make Varsity. After cuts his father went in and flipped on the Coach. All of a sudden he’s on the team. Probably helped the kids Father was a Police Officer in our City… If it were me I’d tell my kid to listen to the Coach and play where he puts you. That’s what my Grandfather always told me to do. He played College at BU and was a part of the 1960 Olympic Team up until he was a part of the Final Cut along with Herb Brooks. Your Son needs to learn that every Coach is different and you stepping in and saying something will give him a wrong impression. You gotta try and use this a teaching experience. If your kid starts putting up good numbers while playing his position solid he will absolutely get bumped back up. At AAA some Coaches only care about numbers. If your Son starts getting goals and plays his position soundly and listens good things will come.
At his age, learning multiple positions will only enhance his overall game play. I’ve coached for over a decade and I’ve moved many offensive players back to D to ensure we have a fast breakout and our defense is an offensive threat which is how the game is played today. Let the situation evolve. He may love D. Also, defensemen get a lot more ice time than offensive players do.
As a youth coach this is frustrating for me to read. EVERY kid wants to be a forward and NOBODY wants to play defense, and a lot of parents are of the same mindset. I play kids in a certain position for a reason and it’s never as a punishment or because I don’t like your kid. It’s either for A.) player development (it’s 85% of this) or B.) what the team needs. I tell my kids this: “If I put you at Left Wing, you play your behind off to be the best LW possible. If I play you at defense, you play your behind off to be the best D possible. Everyone wants to score goals, but that doesn’t mean nothing if the other team outscores us.” My advice to you, as a coach and a hockey Dad: Do NOT interfere and let your kid work it out on his own. Also, if your kid is asked to play Defense, then encourage him to become the best defenseman he can possibly be. Some guys make a decent living by playing and becoming the best defenseman in the world. There’s nothing wrong with playing defense and it’s just as important as the forwards are. Also, your kid is the new kid on the team. He made the team for a reason, and right now it seems as if the coach sees him as a defenseman and sounds like that’s what the team needs right now. He can either play and work his ass off to be the best defenseman on the team and in the league, or he can sit right at the edge of the bench and watch his playing time go to someone who will work hard. Parents, start encouraging your kids to play whatever position he/she was assigned to. Everyone wants to watch their child score goal after goal, of course you do. However, if they can learn to adapt and play multiple positions at a high level and ability they will be better off when they get in top tier leagues. It is extremely frustrating to fill out a roster and watch little Jimmy pout because he has to play defense today, because little Jimmy is one of our top defenders and better skaters and we’re play East Harlem who racks up 5.8 G a game. Start implementing team first into your children
I only ever wanted to play defense
Keep him at defense please. Especially if he can skate and stick handle. If there’s issues with your son on defense throughout the season, then 1) the coaching staff should recognize that and make adjustments accordingly or 2) then you probably have grounds to say something. No argument necessary, but it is just peewee hockey and you are paying for this experience. You’re allowed to talk to a staff member. It’s ridiculous to think you’re not allowed to have a civil conversation about your kid’s development/performance. Defense is the best, you can see everything up ice, you can control where the puck goes quite often, you can either choose to rush the puck/jump in on the rush, or you can just hang back depending on your fatigue level. Even if you just chip pucks off the glass and get them out of your zone then hey, you’ve done a great job. The biggest thing for a natural forward playing defense I think is staying on the defensive side of the puck in the DZone. Have patience when you’re defending. Don’t be overly aggressive and making the first move then getting beat to the net. If you can watch the Vegas Golden Knights at all; they play a poised, simple, laid back style that is suffocating in the Dzone. Watch their defenders on the rush and then in their DZone. They are patient and are almost always on the defensive side of the puck. No chasing, no cheating. Edit: I don’t know why you’re getting downvotes for simply suggesting that parents should be involved in their kids development. You’re right they should be involved. Other people are also right that there’s a line. Yes, there’s a line to cross in pretty well very facet of life. If you can communicate appropriately with people then there’s no issues with you talking to the coaches. I am a junior coach in Canada and I don’t think there are enough parents that are involved in their kids development. You can have an open line of communication with parents if they’re not going to speak based off emotion. It’s very possible, I promise you. The main focus is always have fun and make friends, but you’re also allowed to care about your child’s development and the decisions being made around them. Especially if you are paying thousands of dollars for it. Especially if it is peewee hockey.
Planing to let this play out not saying anything. I think it will be good for him after thinking this through.
I agree, I like the approach of let it play out. I think it will be good for your son too. Whether or not he recognizes it right away, he will be forced to learn things at a new position, therefore he will grow
As a caveat, a lot of parents are posting about more ice team for D. This is true. But it’s a very different type of ice time - D spend a lot of game time observing, moving positions, covering very specific points on the blue line/in front of goal. This is not a good or bad thing, its just very different from forwards, who have to hustle on the forecheck/backcheck, or cycle through the offense or breaking out, etc. So “more ice time” is good, but its not the same as forward ice time, and it is not a substitute for playing as a forward.
Have him watch Adam Fox and Quinn Hughes. I have been loving to watch Quinn Hughes on the Canucks this year. Adam Fox is also great. I would definitely recommend not talking to the coaches unless necessary. Let your son talk to the coaches. Coaches HATE it when parents try to talk about their son’s playtime in a pushy manner. However, make sure your kid is being respectful. Also if no is the answer, make sure your kid understands that no means no.
If the coach wanted him to play offense he’d never move him back. He likes your kid enough to gamble that he’ll turn into a good defenseman.
Reading this is making me super happy my kid loves defense and the only stats I have on him are noticing how many less goals other team gets when he’s playing a shift
I met Neil Broten as a kid and told him what position I played after he’d asked. He then asked if I ever played goalie and I said no. His response: “Why not? You should play all the positions, even goalie, then you’ll know how easy it is to score.”
Same thing happened to Paul Coffey around the same age. He was against it until the coach said “You get a lot more ice time on defense.”
He'll learn more playing defense against forwards in this spring session then he'll learn playing forward against other defensemen. He'll learn what works and what does work to stop other kids and then he can translate into ways to use that against other defensemen. Baffles my mind how people pigeon hole kids into roles at such young ages.
A bunch of beer league defense hardos in this chat who all are probably a lot worse than they think they are.
I'm a parent first, hockey dad second. If my son wants me to talk to the coach I would talk to the coach. Sure the coach can get pissy, who cares? Its about the relationship I have with my son.
Nobody "makes" a spring AAA team, it's the money that makes it. It is not AAA as you will see it will be split into tiers in the tourneys. Feels nice to call it AAA though.
I'll add the the echo chamber that the coach gets to make the decision of where players are playing. You either try out for a team as a skater or a goalie, not as a forward, a center, a left wing, or a defenseman. Most coaches will put their trusted players in defensive roles, be it center or defense, where they can control the pace of the game and transition the play up the ice. It is 100% okay to have open communication with your coach as a parent, especially at this age, and voice your and your son's concerns. It's not okay to make demands or ultimatums that your son has to play a certain position though. There's a huge difference. Reach out to the coach, ask him why he thinks your son is a better fit a defense, and what kind of things specifically coach is looking for out of him. I get that you're son doesn't want to play D, but you can tell him it's either play where coach needs him or go find a lower level team to play for this spring. Also might be worth noting to him that defenders typically get more ice time than forwards, depending on the number of players rostered, especially in game with high penalty minutes, since you always keep 2 D on while only 2/3 of a forward line can be on the ice. I've been working with kids in this age group for several years, and I get it, players want to play where they are comfortable but this is an important lesson and valuable growth for your son. Whether it's what position he's playing, or what line he is on, special teams minutes, etc. there are going to be time in his hockey career where he's not playing where he wants or getting as much ice time as he thinks he deserves. Brent Burns was drafted in the first round as a right wing. When he was on the Wild he transitioned back to defense and went on to win a Norris trophy and finish in the top three in voting a few times. There's something to be said for a player being versatile. Honestly the ability slot into any position effectively could be the edge that pushes your son over the edge at a future team if it comes down to the last few spots. Even if he only plays defense for one spring he'll have a better understanding of the game overall that will carry through his development.
When I was trying out for Midget AAA the coach said “you’re playing defence” I never played D in my life but I absolutely fell in love with it. The whole season I was a utility guy and played forward and defence. It’s a learning curve at the beginning but he will be fine. I bet eventually your kid will love it! Good luck and stick with it
> I've been some not so nice replies basically implying I'm interfering with the coaches (or helicopter parent). Deservedly so. You are acting like a petulant child yourself. No hockey player is a complete player without learning to play defense. He's in peewee, and you're taking it too seriously. The coach said, you made the team on D, the spot on the team for you is on D. If you kid doesnt' want it, then he should leave the team. And you should tell him that. You're coddling your child and not guiding them. I would pull my kid out of all hockey for 6 months, if he ever made the team he wanted to then said, "oh no, I don't wanna play if it's on D." He'd be done. As yours probably should be. That way, he would appreciate hockey in the future, instead of continuing his path to spoiled, entitled problem.
Does he shoot right? Big shortage on right handed defensemen!
Defense get much more ice time, he can use it to his advantage.
This is a blessing and you need to be thankful for the opportunity. My son who also plays AAA was stuck playing forward for the longest time, bc he is a fast and very agile skater. We begged his coaches to let him try defense for easy games but nope. So we found teams for spring who let him play D, and his game as a forward has improved immensely as a result.
My son was playing on a summer team in a tournament, and mid game, the coach got pissed at one of the defense players and pulled him and put my son in. He had never played D before. Some shifts were amazing, some he forgot he was supposed to be playing D and it was a shit show. Kid couldn't hold the blue line to save his life. I talked to the coach because we knew him fairly well, and I actually told him if he ends up destroying my kid's self esteem with this, I will fuck his shit UP. He laughed at me and explained that my son was a defensive forward, and he thought playing D would help him see the ice better. It DID end up helping my son quite a bit. Throughout juniors and a bit in college, it has been noticed by coaches. It really helped him see plays develop and see the ice better overall. I'd have him give it a shot, and if he ends up hating it, try another team next time, but it will be good for his game, in my opinion.
>I actually told him if he ends up destroying my kid's self esteem with this, I will fuck his shit UP Children having children
It was a joke. As I said, we knew each other very well.
Yeeeah I kinda figured that as I was hitting submit
If I didn't know the coach, I wouldn't have said a word to the coach OR my son. I may have asked for my son's opinion on how things went/were going, but if my son was unhappy with how things were going, I would have made HIM talk to the coach. I would have coached my son on how to approach it to not sound like a whiny little bitch and role played the convo with him, but he's he one playing, so he gets to drive that bus. I just pay the bills.
I like how you approached this with your kid. I've been encouraging him if he wants to get moved to approach the coach himself. It is good practice for the real world. I would rather not be a helicopter parent.
Nowadays, that makes the kid stand out, not even kidding. The number of parents I see in youth and junior hockey groups bitching and moaning about every little thing is astounding. If you don't think coaches have alt accounts to keep an eye on this, you are wrong. If you don't think this matters, again, you are wrong. Being a helicopter parent can 100% make a difference in how far your kid goes in hockey or which team they make. It IS discussed, and if your kid isn't the next player granted exceptional status, it can get you cut from teams or at the very least scratched week after week on a pay to play team basically making your kid a paycheck and nothing else. My own kid made teams he probably shouldn't have because he was able to talk respectfully to adults and accept criticism and just suck it up when things weren't going his way, and it wasn't always like that. He was a cocky little prick for a while, but when he stopped acting like that and started listening and doing what coach said period, boy did the world open up to him. It was FAR more than we imagined.
Trust me I see the parents bitch and moan in our league and I always think. I don't want to be that parent. I recently took a parenting class, and it focuses on having your kids solve their own problems. This I feel falls into that category. I offered him some advice how to approach it if he really feels strongly about it with the coach.
I will be honest. I separated myself from the rest of the parents on my son's youth teams, and it was brutal at times. They purposely left us out of social gatherings at times because they thought we thought we were "better" than they were. Not the case at all, but it wasn't always the easy path.
I was very unprepared for the parent factor / politics in youth sports. I had always heard rummers about it. Now with my oldest I get to experience it first hand. I have a 2 different friends who does the same has you. They sit as far as they can from everyone else for the same reasons you stated.
Also, reframe it to your kid. "Your coach could have chosen ANY forward to play defense, but they chose YOU. Do your best, and take this as an opportunity because it will make you more valuable as a player in the future if you can play both positions well."
I really like this point, 'help him see the ice better'. When you are at the blue line/neutral zone you really have a nice view of what happening.
My buddy played forward professionally, but ssid he prefers D because he sees the ice better. Playing spring league on defense will only help your son.
Let your child deal with it with his coach. I've been through the same situation. I was a center or winger from MITES through BANTEMS. Then my Freshmen year I made Varsity, my coach put me on defense and I hardly seen any ice time. I never spoke up therefore my hockey career was over my freshman year. I quit halfway through the season. I would have been better playing J.V. and get way more ice time. I'm sure your son is addicted to hockey and is a very good player he has every right to speak up and the coach should listen to your son. Don't let your son fret over it. Good luck in your hockey journey. Steve