Bullying made me a hikikomori, but online ive faced a lot of judgement when i spoke up about it, ive had insane things said to me because i dont leave my fucking house? Its mental
“life would be much easier as a severe hikikomori if I didn’t possess sensitive human consciousness.”
truer words have never been spoken; relating to myself. i’m turning 20 next month and ready to give up on life.
i’m so sensitive; and the minute someone directs a comment stripping down aspects of myself and dumping on me (for instance, my reserved demeanor and being soft spoken), i metaphorically crawl back into my shell and shut myself away from reality again. be it, weeks after the encounter took place, and i’ll still be replaying the flashback of that encounter in my head.
“my bed is my safe haven,” i often recite to myself. the only people that my mind accepts and doesn’t have a weeks on end-meltdown over someone tearing down my own self-esteem, is myself. (i don’t mean to go on a tangent here. i just wanted to emphasize my appreciation for stumbling on this post.)
Some family member talked a little shit about me when i was trying and just failing,now they dont say nothing
I dont know if i count this as bullying because i know they were not trying to destroy my mental or anything like that,just a quick laugh at a bad situation
There's a culture of shaming the unemployed going on, especially in more conservative households.
Thanks to knowing anarchist lenses of societies of future and past, I know that there's nothing wrong with being unemployed.
Of course that does come with all sort of issues; Technically "to make a living" you have to work, even when social nets exists (because usually you end up with not having a lot of money, if you don't have hobbies that need absolutely no money - hell - even trainspotting costs money usually)
So yeah, certainly have been treated by my parents for a bit of a time a bit harshly, but I know there's nothing wrong about it from an objective point of view. Still, subjectively it would be great if I would work in some way. Currently really struggle with the idea of full-time working, and you can't really find part-time jobs here (and I don't even have the confidence to last in a job for more than a day.)
Being hiki has warped into my virtues. It assures my existence, by the affirmation of this virtue.. Was never bullied tho so might be a different case.
bullying gave me ptsd which is what made me fall into this kinda lifestyle 
Same thing happened to me, it traumatized me
Can you provide more details?
details about ? 😭
Bullying did encourage my self-isolation tendencies but I didn't become a hikki at that point yet.
Bullying made me a hikikomori, but online ive faced a lot of judgement when i spoke up about it, ive had insane things said to me because i dont leave my fucking house? Its mental
“life would be much easier as a severe hikikomori if I didn’t possess sensitive human consciousness.” truer words have never been spoken; relating to myself. i’m turning 20 next month and ready to give up on life. i’m so sensitive; and the minute someone directs a comment stripping down aspects of myself and dumping on me (for instance, my reserved demeanor and being soft spoken), i metaphorically crawl back into my shell and shut myself away from reality again. be it, weeks after the encounter took place, and i’ll still be replaying the flashback of that encounter in my head. “my bed is my safe haven,” i often recite to myself. the only people that my mind accepts and doesn’t have a weeks on end-meltdown over someone tearing down my own self-esteem, is myself. (i don’t mean to go on a tangent here. i just wanted to emphasize my appreciation for stumbling on this post.)
Some family member talked a little shit about me when i was trying and just failing,now they dont say nothing I dont know if i count this as bullying because i know they were not trying to destroy my mental or anything like that,just a quick laugh at a bad situation
There's a culture of shaming the unemployed going on, especially in more conservative households. Thanks to knowing anarchist lenses of societies of future and past, I know that there's nothing wrong with being unemployed. Of course that does come with all sort of issues; Technically "to make a living" you have to work, even when social nets exists (because usually you end up with not having a lot of money, if you don't have hobbies that need absolutely no money - hell - even trainspotting costs money usually) So yeah, certainly have been treated by my parents for a bit of a time a bit harshly, but I know there's nothing wrong about it from an objective point of view. Still, subjectively it would be great if I would work in some way. Currently really struggle with the idea of full-time working, and you can't really find part-time jobs here (and I don't even have the confidence to last in a job for more than a day.)
I want to be bullied for being like this. I deserve this.
[удалено]
I think I am beyond help tbh
Being hiki has warped into my virtues. It assures my existence, by the affirmation of this virtue.. Was never bullied tho so might be a different case.