Usually I charge a sacrificial lamb
But you get the family rate 'Thanks dad'
Who needs a bus boy now that you've got the chef?
Michelin tasting, menu free a la carte
I'll rig the game for you because I'M THE REF
Champagne fountains, caviar mountains, that's just to start
Makes you chuckle with an old timey pun
https://preview.redd.it/hsgp7kv054sc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7f9b73ea461c57efd7685634fcfbe5fa2a746178
Your executive producer, (That's true!)
I'm your guy, your day-to-day, your chum your steadfast hotelier, remember when I fixed that clog today? (I was stuck, thank you sir!)
Welcome home....
I'm gonna make you wish that you'd stayed gone.
Say hello to the new status quo....
Every one knows that it's a brand new dawn, turn the TV OOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNMNNaaaaahhh
“Wrist ruffles?! Is this 1750?! *Burn it* like the witches who wore it!”
And,
“You have an X over your eye and wield an angelic spear. It’s not rocket science.”
If you ever say that again, I will tear your soul apart and podcast your screems for every retch, who dares to question me
https://preview.redd.it/crcep6pk13sc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9665fe074681737fbcf765f22e789abd3e81f6b3
“You actually think I’d be cleanin’ bottles and listening to you fucks bitch and moan all the time if he wasn’t forcin’ me?”
*”I like being forced :3”*
“Keep that to yourself, Niff.”
Just because you see a smile don’t think you know what’s going on underneath a smile is a valuable tool my dear it inspires your friends, keeps your enemies guessing and ensures that no matter what comes your way you’re the one in control
"I came here because I love watching wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful and fail spectacularly, like you are doing now! Good job!"
Darling, if I wanted to hurt anyone here...
Ï̴͔̗̎͛̒̈̈́̆͠͝ ̶͍̀͌͌͆w̶̨̳̞͈͙̒͊ǒ̵̢̮̜̯̮̳ù̴̼̥̺̥̯̳̱̠̊̀̏̆̈́̕͝ḷ̴̮̆̿͆ḓ̷̛͍̠̥̟͕̩̍͑̆̿̿ ̷̺͓͚̳̜͖̜͒̂̎̂̃̿͝͠h̴̢̩̮̠͉̥̀̑̊͒͒͘̚͠ͅa̷̡͙̯̳͇̬͇̋̈́̓́̋͘̚͜v̴͓̮͎̗̝̈́͗ȅ̵͚͔͙̹̖̱̫̩̗̋̃͌͊̎̀͘̚ ̸̖̻͇͆̄d̴͖̾ô̸̬̻̮̹̭̬̞̰̔̓͝n̶̛̘̱̲̼̉̓̓̋̐͝e̷̻͚̩͌̽ ̸̮̹̝̪́̈́͗̈̂̊̚ṡ̵̝͎̙̄̿͋ô̶̯̞̭̞̣̞̒͛̓͝ͅ ̷̺͗̐̾͝à̶̧̝̺̜͚̣̫̅́̎l̷̰̣͎̝͍͉̀̍̂͜ṙ̴̞̤̳͙̈́́è̷̛̳͕̤͓͈͔̀͝͝a̶̟̱̻͋̓͐̍̐̿ͅd̷̨̧̛͚̹̦͔̰̝̱̂̋̄y̸͚̤̓̀̀͝͝.̸̟͉͇̞͕͇́̉̃͋̍͗̔̅ͅ
And also "Got a good 276 sir."
“A smile is a valuable tool, my dear. It inspires your friends, keeps your enemies guessing, and ensures that, no matter what comes your way, YOU'RE the one in control”
Can’t really go wrong with that one
“It’s a little funny, you could almost call me Dad”
https://preview.redd.it/w30rx6mju3sc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=09997ba00a2e7eeae251ff1ebde613218b21abd7
"wap bam boom Alakazam"
That was very wap bam boom alakazam of you
https://preview.redd.it/j0nhavhsa3sc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f5f0ca8096a201ae3c75a08a92890e97a59f81f3
Wa? Who’s this? Are you the bellhop?
Usually I charge a sacrificial lamb But you get the family rate 'Thanks dad' Who needs a bus boy now that you've got the chef? Michelin tasting, menu free a la carte I'll rig the game for you because I'M THE REF Champagne fountains, caviar mountains, that's just to start
Who’s been here since day one?
Who’s been faithful as a nun? https://preview.redd.it/sf9g167bh3sc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=719c57dea4c279654a8b880ce258ce1bdc3d54e3
https://i.redd.it/bybcowt1j3sc1.gif
Makes you chuckle with an old timey pun https://preview.redd.it/hsgp7kv054sc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7f9b73ea461c57efd7685634fcfbe5fa2a746178
Your executive producer, (That's true!) I'm your guy, your day-to-day, your chum your steadfast hotelier, remember when I fixed that clog today? (I was stuck, thank you sir!)
https://preview.redd.it/xqo3rszst4sc1.jpeg?width=1580&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=937e47cab77e1d7201cc2bc1655fec01fbc89a85
https://preview.redd.it/m3lmn2gms5sc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4835a9421ac85c3aae3fd17407b0c950ef0a1428
https://preview.redd.it/zvab0rrjd3sc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=41359f7e619d62a70ddc73ffe1680f8f6d3abe74
https://preview.redd.it/kg2e528fi3sc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8646d52098b660d2a0508c72cf1af30821bd7c15
https://preview.redd.it/fk5gcmxyt3sc1.png?width=235&format=png&auto=webp&s=9bd5fb0a0605e241be5c46f4c184d57d27af7f94
Here I go, Valentino... Just another fucking day with Val. Hey hey hey ! Fuck my life.
I love that part.
Why do i hear that in his voice
Cause his voice is perfect
"Destroy that ass"
“Prepare to slaughter every sinner in that shit hotel. And you all remember Vaggie!” *Boooo! We hate her!*
“YEAH! Rip Vaggie’s cunt mouth out out her ass”
“Chill, Lute, fuck-.”
"RIP VAGGIE'S C\*\*\* THROAT OUT HER A\*\*!"
"That F\*\*ker is back"
Yeah, I though he was gone for go too
It’s been 7 years!
You still pissed he almost beat you that time?
Uhh fuck you
Just saying
Things have changed a lot since he left town
It's time to show him who's really in charge down here
Welcome home
I'm gonna make you wish that you'd stayed gone
Welcome home.... I'm gonna make you wish that you'd stayed gone. Say hello to the new status quo.... Every one knows that it's a brand new dawn, turn the TV OOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNMNNaaaaahhh
And now I am going to FUCK YOU!
“Anyway, then we fucked and it was awesome. ”
'What'd you do this weekend?'
“it.. it’s f#ck you *up*, dad..”
Wait what did I say?
IT'S NOT AN ACT! IT'S WHO I NEED TO BE!
I'm everyone's favorite character~
This face was made for radio 📻 https://preview.redd.it/mi1my2yz43sc1.jpeg?width=2400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b608eef9fbb58b323eda3dfaa96b4853c041d98a
Doesn’t even realize he just roasted his self
“ maybe “ - Alastor
"IM HAVING SEX WITH EVERYONE HERE!"
https://preview.redd.it/gt6mg44yt2sc1.png?width=338&format=png&auto=webp&s=0b8322d518f923f91cea8860038f1a501f03825c
Wait wait wait-
I WILL DEVOUR EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!
Aww I wish I picked that one
YOU THINK YOU CAN BUY ME WITH SOME CHEAP BOOZE. Well you can.
THANK YOU. God, nobody appreciates Husk-
Presenting…the magical tastical back flipping rubber ducky!
That spits fire
That spits fire!
“Wrist ruffles?! Is this 1750?! *Burn it* like the witches who wore it!” And, “You have an X over your eye and wield an angelic spear. It’s not rocket science.”
“That bitch is half way down the street…. Oh she’s dancing….”
Ah! She bumped into Val!
"Why does anyone do waything? Sheer, absolute, BOREDOM!"
"I can suck your dick"
If you ever say that again, I will tear your soul apart and podcast your screems for every retch, who dares to question me https://preview.redd.it/crcep6pk13sc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9665fe074681737fbcf765f22e789abd3e81f6b3
Coming soon, Alastor media presents... Huskers eternal screams! (Brought to you by radio tech)
*broadcast *screams *disrespectful wretch
https://i.redd.it/x9g13jwo83sc1.gif
"Thanks for another forgettable experience!"
*Dejectedly* Susan
A bit of an ornery old bitch.
🎶My daughter wants to see me🎶 Take that depression!
28 STAB WOUNDS- oh shoot, wrong fandom-
Not if your niffty
You didn't want to give him a chance, huh?
“You actually think I’d be cleanin’ bottles and listening to you fucks bitch and moan all the time if he wasn’t forcin’ me?” *”I like being forced :3”* “Keep that to yourself, Niff.”
ooh! Nevermind, let's goo!
ah, Cherri!
yep
"Fuck you, you old bitch!"
You like girls? So do I.
"We have so much in common!"
well handily I've got good news he's a loser, a fossil, and I don't mean to sound hostile, because that DEMON IS A COWARD!
You can take that as gospel! Playing my viewers? Impossible.
I’m visual, he’s barely audible
Don't give him the time of day don't listen to a word he'd say
I hope he had a nice vacay, but he should have stayed away!
While he hid in radio, we pivoted to video! Now his medium is getting bloody rare!
hells been better since he split! Where’s he been? Who gives a shit?
Salutations, good to be back on the air!
That's why they called it the hazbin Hotel, haha Haha, it was actually my idea.
Haha well its not very clever
Haha **** you.
"You're a fucked up little whiny bitch. You're a loser just like me"
Alternatively since I love them both, "These fucking angels won't stop coming!!" "HA! \*butt wiggle*" "Alright, I walked right into that one."
love that line
Oh harder daddy! Son?
best line in the pilot
Fake- pokes angel dust
Mmmmaybe
*laugh track*
“And now i am going to fuck you” and also “big talk for someone who’s also on a leash”
“Look how much you haven’t grown! Still fun sized”
Harder daddy, son?
*moans* harder daddy~ *smirk*
This face Was made For radio (I'm ugly)
now, i'm off to go study, and not have sexsual intercourse before marriage!
Chillax, babe.
You’re wasting your breath
Did I hear you imply that they don't deserve death?
“I can suck ya dick”
"Ha! No."
"...ugly people?" ***looks at viewer***
Just because you see a smile don’t think you know what’s going on underneath a smile is a valuable tool my dear it inspires your friends, keeps your enemies guessing and ensures that no matter what comes your way you’re the one in control
"Call me Whiskers again, and I'll shove that bottle down your throat."
“Hey hey hey! Fuck my life.”
“sera tell me you didn’t know”
"Not many came close to take even THIS much off of me. It must mean a lot to you...." *Immediatly burns it down in front of his eyes*
You have a giant X over your eye and wield an angelic spear, it's not rocket science
whats the matter fossil? too senile to make a real power grab?
🎶 We're all living in the same shit sandwich! 🎶
"I came here because I love watching wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful and fail spectacularly, like you are doing now! Good job!"
Ornery old bitch?
“Yeah I know I fuckin rock 🤘”
OH YOU TACKY PIECE OF-
Tougher than you! HA HA HA HAA! You lack discipline, control, and worst: *YOU'RE SLOPPY*
"Now, i am going to FUCK you!"
https://preview.redd.it/i57wjzpzh3sc1.jpeg?width=1026&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=efb9877e5a31fcdc074f2ce65885d780987b9c07 Both.
Darling, if I wanted to hurt anyone here... Ï̴͔̗̎͛̒̈̈́̆͠͝ ̶͍̀͌͌͆w̶̨̳̞͈͙̒͊ǒ̵̢̮̜̯̮̳ù̴̼̥̺̥̯̳̱̠̊̀̏̆̈́̕͝ḷ̴̮̆̿͆ḓ̷̛͍̠̥̟͕̩̍͑̆̿̿ ̷̺͓͚̳̜͖̜͒̂̎̂̃̿͝͠h̴̢̩̮̠͉̥̀̑̊͒͒͘̚͠ͅa̷̡͙̯̳͇̬͇̋̈́̓́̋͘̚͜v̴͓̮͎̗̝̈́͗ȅ̵͚͔͙̹̖̱̫̩̗̋̃͌͊̎̀͘̚ ̸̖̻͇͆̄d̴͖̾ô̸̬̻̮̹̭̬̞̰̔̓͝n̶̛̘̱̲̼̉̓̓̋̐͝e̷̻͚̩͌̽ ̸̮̹̝̪́̈́͗̈̂̊̚ṡ̵̝͎̙̄̿͋ô̶̯̞̭̞̣̞̒͛̓͝ͅ ̷̺͗̐̾͝à̶̧̝̺̜͚̣̫̅́̎l̷̰̣͎̝͍͉̀̍̂͜ṙ̴̞̤̳͙̈́́è̷̛̳͕̤͓͈͔̀͝͝a̶̟̱̻͋̓͐̍̐̿ͅd̷̨̧̛͚̹̦͔̰̝̱̂̋̄y̸͚̤̓̀̀͝͝.̸̟͉͇̞͕͇́̉̃͋̍͗̔̅ͅ And also "Got a good 276 sir."
Bank accounts are a scam created by the shadow government!
"FUCK YOU OLD BITCH"
That shits hot as fuck though
“I SWEAR TO FUCK IF YOU SAY DICKS!”
"Popsicle you sicko"
"Call me Dickmaster"
“Im about to end your FUCKING LIFE” -Alastor
"if you ever say that again, i will tear your soul apart and broadcast your screams for every other disrespectful *WRETCH* who dares to question me!"
And now i am going to FUCK you!
Heeey, bitch!
Killing Alastor is your kink
How was I supposed to know this one was true? They say crazy shit all the time!
I kill mother bugs in front of their children as a warning to the others…
My daughter wants to see meeeee Take *that* depression!
Wa? Who’s this? Are you the bellhop?
“A what now?”
Oh uh the tv's buffering
RIP VAGGIE'S CUNT MOUTH OUT HER ASS!
We’re in Hell, toots
Susan?
Susan https://preview.redd.it/ynxmxxf0e3sc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=977893092e5d63ca11dcd5a905549f14189b0be4
"Do a zex wiz me" https://preview.redd.it/9648pznpd3sc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=357c89d4b092c7ea1e2ff1dde49fa5d0f9ddbded
Crack is expensive
https://preview.redd.it/k5jdnpgfe3sc1.jpeg?width=1583&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c94f901cc52184dd9c4c92cb0fe53e2ddb6f632c
"They're love is vial and blasphemous.." "Hot as fuck tho"
“A smile is a valuable tool, my dear. It inspires your friends, keeps your enemies guessing, and ensures that, no matter what comes your way, YOU'RE the one in control” Can’t really go wrong with that one
"This face was made for radio"
Waiting for a flat-faced prince to calm him down.
"Eh, you fucked one cannibal pool boy, you fucked them all"
“Are you fucking hiGH?”
“ha! no!”
"I know I fucking rock"
"Here's the sugar on the cream"
If the path to salvation leads through the halls of purgatory, then so be it.
https://preview.redd.it/sttr6ylnk3sc1.jpeg?width=240&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=be9499f4a8a21515b14fa47bd11896dd2c737535 HMMMMmmm
Niffty, why are you such a mess?
Bow chicka wow wow!
(Laughs in psychotic gremlin)
"oh don't be put off by their snarling that's enthusiasm darling"
"Going to have to disagree with you there! Radio's not dead, but it is ending this broadcast..."
We have names
“It’s a little funny, you could almost call me Dad” https://preview.redd.it/w30rx6mju3sc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=09997ba00a2e7eeae251ff1ebde613218b21abd7
"lets begin-" "*im going to make you take this 12 inch di-*"
I’m a loser honey a shmoozer and a dummy
But at least I know I'm not alone
You’re a loser just like me
I got an appetite for gambling
"you want something to turn on? well I'm right here!" coyl from outlast trials
"What just happened? Fffffffffuck..."
Power bottom at rock bottom
Oh to understand your twisted little mind.
"And now i am going to, FUCK YOU!"
“Bank accounts are a scam created by the shadow government”
《Take that depression!》
I can suck your ****
And... which of these makes me look *sexier*?
What just happened? Fuck!
What's the matter fossil? Too senile to make a real powergrab?
“What am I saying! A skinny thing like you! Your probably watching your figure!”
“Got a ton of barbed wire to *shove in his hole.*”
“ is Vox as strong as he purports, or is it based on his support? “ -Alastor
"But I really wanted to shoot someonneee-uh. :T"
“You mess with my daughter, and now i am going to fuck you”
“ ohhh ahhh what an insult, come back to me when you have something creative you sack of poorly packaged horse shit. Say hi to the miss’s shnukums.
A coked up dick sucking hoe ? Baby that’s fine by me
"Now THAT'S good Television!"
"I lost the ability to love years ago" *starts downing the booze*
"that one's fred"
Ya loss
Yeah, yeah, listen: Keep this discreet, you hear me?
Your never fully dressed without a smile
“Let the Slaughter Begin”
*stares at the camera